The GOP Presidential Primary Online Dating Game

Not sure who to commit to in the Republican primary race? Let Reason help you out. 

Picking a presidential candidate is like sorting through online dating profiles—nobody's quite right, but once a meet-cute is out of the question, the best you can hope for is to pick a mate out of a self-selected digital lineup.

Thus our handy candidate profiles and dating quiz. We've got the candidates' horoscopes, their nick-names, and catalog of flip-flops. (Here's looking at you, Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney.) Is Rick Perry the real deal when it comes to small government? We can tell you. What are Herman Cain's hang-ups? We've got those too.

Take our quiz to help select your ideal whatever-in-chief, or just prowl through the offerings by checking out our profiles of all the GOP wannabes.

The quiz!

The candidates:

Gary Johnson

Ron Paul

Rick Perry

Rick Santorum

Mitt Romney

Michele Bachmann

Herman Cain

Jon Huntsman

Newt Gingrich

Sarah Palin (not a candidate, but just in case!)  

Bone up before tonight's GOP debate in Las Vegas!

Comments

[Joe M]

You know, you guys really should include Fred Karger and Buddy Roemer, to be fair.

[prolefeed]

Politics isn't about fair. Your fellow citizens voting on which sociopath gets to rob you and steal your liberty, ostensibly for your fellow citizens' benefit, is not a process conducive to massive levels of "fair", unless you use the twisted version of that word favored by statists.

[Just Dropping By]

That "Religion" question is a real tough one!

[Fatty Bolger]

Sometimes there is no right answer.

[Lost_In_Translation]

The only answer is not to play

[Kobayashi Maru]

I know, right?

[WHOPPER]

I...BELIEVE...HE...WAS...TALKING...TO...ME

[Pro Libertate]

Already did this one. Johnson. Too bad the media says he isn't running.

[Drake]

Wow - Cain.

I assumed it would be Gingrich or one of the Libertarians.

[Fatty Bolger]

Same thing for me (except for the Gingrich part).

[QuietDesperation]

I got Princess Celestia. WTF?

[Lurker]

Lucky!

[Spencer]

This quiz is broken.

[fuck, marry, kill]

Jon Huntsman

Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich (hell, who could stand him)

[Joe]

Marry for the Tiffany's ring?

[How dare you!]

Gingrich's $500000 revolving line of credit at Tiffanys had absolutely nothing to do with my choice 😉

[Lost_In_Translation]

Caaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!

[Joe]

Q: What's Cain's favorite sex position?

A: 999! Santorum agrees!

[How dare you!]

well it ain't all dressed 🙂

[Tab Spangler]

Admit it. No matter what you pick, Ron Paul always comes up in the end!

[Jozef]

Romney?! WTF?!?!?! But in all honesty, I had a very difficult time trying to find the least evil answer.

[QuietDesperation]

Eh, I think I'll stick with hiring an escort. At least that's an honest and open business transaction.

[sarcasmic]

Last time I got Romney, this time I got Johnson.

[Joe]

You actually still got Romney, he just found out that the polls say Americans support Johnson's positions, and adjusted his views accordingly.

[d]

Whom to commit, not who.

[mr simple]

Palin is running for president?

[Just Dropping By]

The post actually says right after her name "(not a candidate, but just in case!)," so I'm unclear on your problem. She's said she's not running, but until the registration deadlines actually start passing at the end of October, there's always the risk that she'll change her mind.

[Joe]

I couldn't help but notice that the names aren't listed in alphabetical order. Are you trying to tell us something about your preferences?

[Barely Suppressed Rage]

This quiz definitely is broken. I got Bachmann, fer god's sake. And I think she's batshit crazy.

[Lurker]

At least you don't have the gay.

[Lurker]

Assuming you're a dude...

[Entropy Void]

Cain!
Wonder what would happen if they threw BarryO in the mix just for funsies?

[cw]

I got Huntsman...ugh.

[David Friedman]

I came up with Gary Johnson, which is about right, since Mitch Daniels isn't running.

But I was disappointed to see that Reason thinks Sarah Palin said that the Iraq war was a mission given us by God. As you can easily check by listening to webbed recordings of her speech, what she said was that her audience should pray that it was a mission given us by God, which not only does not imply that it is but at least suggests that she was afraid it might not be.

I'm not terribly surprised that the mass media repeatedly misrepresented that particular quote, but I expect better of Reason.

[Game NBA Live Stream]

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[Sports Matches]

This is a smart blog. I mean it. You have so much knowledge about this issue, and so much passion. You also know how to make people rally behind it, obviously from the responses. Youve got a design here thats not too flashy, but makes a statement as big as what youre saying. Great job, indeed.