Reason Morning Links: Minnesota Shuts Down, Tim Pawlenty Files Peanuts, Ohio Cops Tase a Mentally Handicapped Child


  • The Minnesota government shut down this morning after an impasse during budget talks between Democratic Gov. Mark Dayton and GOP lawmakers. 
  • "Dayton police 'mistook' a mentally handicapped teenager's speech impediment for 'disrespect,' so they Tasered, pepper-sprayed, and beat him and called for backup from 'upward of 20 police officers'." 
  • Former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty has raised this fundraising cycle roughly the same amount he raised in 2008, when nobody knew who he was. 
  • Outgoing Defense Secretary Robert Gates apologizes for the unexplained firing and smearing of a defense intelligence analyst in 2009. 
  • Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaiao starts an all-female DUI chain gang.
  • Is there any doubt that British Journalist Johann Hari is a plagiarist

New at "The War on Lemonade Stands! Nanny of the Month."


NEXT: Friday Funnies

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  1. Suki Held Hostage. Day 2.

    Johnny Longtorso is continuing to hold Suki hostage until his amazon review for The Declaration of Independents becomes the most ‘useful’ review of the book. Longtorso spokesperson, STEVE “HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN” SMITH, issed a rambling, off topic statement about unspeakable things done to campers in the name of the empire. Excuse me, [THE EMPIRE].

    Suki’s life partner John fears she will deflate if abused too much, and should only be reinflated with imported air from Osaka. And that I’m a mainstream media tool who will find a way to blame the GOP for all this.

    Again, there will be no Golden Girls links until Longtorso’s demands are met.

    Blogger Andrew Sullivan is here to discuss how these developments impact the 2012 election. Mr Sullivan?

    THIS IS A PLOT BY SARAH PALIN TO DISTRACT US FROM THE TRUTH THAT SHE IS TRIG’S MOTHER AND HURT MY LORD AND SAVIOR BARAK OBAMA WHO IS SO DREAMY!!!!! Did I mention I’m both gay and conservative, giving me a unique, publicity-worthy image, despite agreeing with your standard liberal on every topic imaginable?

    Wait, you’re not Andrew Sullivan.

    I’m one of his blogging interns. If I’m good enough to do his writing for him, I’m good enough to do his interviews.

    Next, someone who knew Suki, a regular Hit and Run commentor, one Choney.

    This whole thing is an externality. Not releasing Suki is inactivity and clearly illegal, so shut up about Obamacare. Externalities. My art collection is better than yours. You are cattle.

    Finally, someone named “MNG”:

    Piltdown Man!!!!!!! I will now take advantage of John’s grief with a 3 day flame war, then hot makeup sex.

    We will continue to cover this breaking story and bring you any new developments.

    1. What’s wrong with “First”?
      Stick with the classics.

    2. Dude, it ain’t happenin. 20 of 63? You’re screwed. There aren’t enough HnR commentators to save you.

    3. I like the cut of your jib.

    4. We don’t negotiate with terrorists.

    5. I thought Koppel was dead.

      1. This just in, I’m dead.

        1. Ted Koppel is a waffle.

        2. Ted Koppel is a waffle.

    6. I’ve done my part, even though you fucked up the history of The Jacket so badly you will surely suffer His leathery wrath.

    7. Don’t blame me. I was on the golf links.

  2. “Arpaio starts all woman DUI chain gang”

    and so begins another Roger Corman movie.

  3. Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaiao starts an all-female DUI chain gang.

    Are they busty?

    1. Will hi-jinx ensue?

    2. They are certainly busted.

      Also: I read that first as “DIY chain gang”…

      1. That’s the best kind.

  4. All-female chain gang? This sounds like the start to a good movie.

    1. Cue the “thumpa-thumpa” music, with Gillespie and his pornstache making an appearance as the prison guard.

  5. That video screencap looks like a anti-pedophilia PSA.

    1. Or a training video for the TSA.

    1. But he’s French!

    2. While there definitely was an overreaction and rush to convict DSK in the public mind, I think the media is now overreacting in the opposite direction.

      In rape cases, attacking the credibility of the accuser is SOP. Hardly something that indicates a collapse in the case.

      The only really big things right now I see are the phone call about profiting from the case and that she doesn’t appear to be the poor African refugee she was first presented as. Maybe that will change the case, but it really depends on what physical evidence they have.

      1. Whilst the media may have overreacted, the credibility doubts are coming from the prosecution rather than the defence.

        1. I misread the article at first. I thought it said the prosecutors had no problem with the case when they do. That certainly is a more serious problem. Still, that doesn’t necessarily mean the case has collapsed, but that they realized there’s a lot more reasonable doubt for what they previously thought was a slam dunk.

      2. Unless the physical evidence shows that she was beaten or restrained, I don’t see how it could make a difference.

        The DNA evidence would be identical whether she’s telling the truth or it’s a setup.

        1. There’s that, but I was also think of any video footage within the hotel that may show how either the accuser or DSK were acting immediately after they left the room.

          Unlikely to be any completely damning evidence there, but there could be something.

          1. If she was doing this it could be a clue.

  6. Do I get a hat tip for the Dayton story?

  7. Fuck, that’s awesome! Three similar comments at the exact same minute.

    1. Certain H&R commenters gravitate to the same stories. Sickos.

      1. it’s my love of B-Movies.

  8. The Minnesota government shut down this morning…

    One down, 49 to go.

    1. You know, when power plants shut down for forced outages, you usually spend large amounts of time and effort to fix them up and return them to service better than they were. I’m guessing there will be no effort to repair or improve Minnesota’s government other than to try to increase funding.

  9. Where’s Fearless Fosdick to tell us that kid refused to comply with a legal order, and those cops were performing a public service by trying to knock some sense into him?

    1. dude shoulda been waterboarded while being sodomized w electric nightsticks

    2. Two words:

      Retard strength.

      The noble public servants feared for their lives.

      1. Two words:

        Retard strength.

        That was a comment on OO, right?

      2. Chicken-shit Heroes

  10. Is there any doubt that British Journalist Johann Hari is a plagiarist?

    Who cares, MSNBC now has a spot open on Morning Joe next to me. He’ll find work.

  11. Fake Babies, Fake Lives

    “Reborn dolls,” seen this way, are closer to drugs than they are to collectibles. Like street drugs, they reduce anxiety by substituting an illusion.

    Wow, he stretched so hard there I think he pulled something in his brain. Still: I can’t wait for the no-knock raids… shooting stuffed dogs and tossing the house for fake babies.

    1. He’s a psychiatrist; what do you expect? He’s pissed because it’s people taking care of their issues without therapy, which cuts into his livelihood.

      1. Just don’t jump on my couch, okay?

  12. “Dayton police ‘mistook’ a mentally handicapped teenager’s speech impediment for ‘disrespect,’so they Tasered, pepper-sprayed and beat him and called for backup from ‘upward of 20 police officers’.”

    Yep. Read that one if you want a pick-me-up this morning.

    1. …Hooper “apparently took Jesse’s speech impediment for disrespect … [and] began yelling at Jesse and after Jesse attempted to communicate with him[.] Jesse, being a minor and mentally challenged/handicapped, turned and rode his bike back to his home in an attempt to ask his mother, Ford, to help him communicate with defendant Cooper,”

      On the way, the mom says, “A neighbor attempted to communicate with Officer Hooper about Jesse’s disabilities and was told to go back into his home, or he would be arrested.”

      As Ford opened her front door, she says, Hooper and co-defendant Officer John Howard, “fired their Tasers, striking Jesse in the back with both probes.”

      “Once inside the house, defendant Hooper and defendant Howard began to struggle with Jesse, who was standing against the back door with his hands up in front of his face, saying ‘Please quit, please quit.’

      Prediction: The internal police investigation will find that the officer, who will have been placed on paid administrative leave, followed proper procedure. The officer will be promoted within 8 months and receive some sort of community award. If civil proceedings are initiated, the result of the investigation, the promotion, and award will all be used as evidence of this police officer’s outstanding service to the community which should not be tarnished by a single “isolated incident.” The civil suit will be settled out of court for an undisclosed sum of at least several hundred thousand dollars, which will be paid by the taxpayers of Dayton. The officer will receive back pay for “potential overtime” that he could have made while on administrative leave. The boy will live the rest of his life in fear of police officers, and the overall prestige and trust of the community for police officers will be lessened.

      1. Don’t forget the massive sado-boners the officers get when they get to fantasize about the day they got to beat up the handicapped kid while he cowered in fear.

        You just can’t put a price on something like that.

        1. I’m sure this story will be told at barbecues and Christmas parties for years to come.

          1. I’ve been at a couple of cop’s picnics…the stories they tell when they think they’re among friends can be infuriating.

            1. Yeah dude, it’s amazing. And by amazing I mean maddening to the point where you want to drink yourself blind in a corner.

            2. You’re surprised to find out that people who seek out a profession that allows them to inflict pain and bodily harm turn out to be sociopaths?


              1. Who said I was surprised? Should I be less infuriated if I expect to hear stories about violating people’s rights and getting away with it?

                1. Just accept it and keep it in mind whenever you have to deal with one of these worthless pieces of shit.

                  Kiss his ass or be prepared to have the living shit kicked out of you.

            3. As is the widespread drunken driving afterwards…

      2. The boy will live the rest of his life in fear of police officers,

        There’s your silver lining, right there.

        1. Yup.

          1. I am a caretaker to a woman with mental retardation. She functions at about the level of a 5 year old. Her parents have drilled it into her that police are people who will help when you’re in trouble. She loves cops. Her father also thinks I’m extremely biased on the subject of abusive policing tactics. I’m thinking he needs to see this story.

      3. Civil proceedings have already been initiated. Note the “defendant” in front of the officers’ names.

      4. Man, you talk like this has happened before. I’m sure this is just an isolated incident and not something I read about every fucking morning.

      5. Maybe that’ll teach the kid not to disrespect the AUTHORITAH. If you ever have a communication problem with the police, just get on your knees and kiss their feet.

    2. It’s like they show Cartman as Sheriff in police academies nationwide. Actually that might be better; he handles disrespect of authoritah himself rather than calling in the whole department.

    3. Wow. Just when you think you couldn’t despise entitled cops and their brutality one iota more…

      That guy deserves to be shamed and hounded till he exiles himself to the wilds of Alaska. I would make it a point to call that guy an asshole and give him the finger every time I saw him. Maybe he’d relearn that constitutional rights trump his bloated sense of self-entitlement.
      If the citizens of that town have any integrity they will clamp down on those thugs and slash the funding that allows so many arrogant brutish assholes the luxury of gang-assaulting a kid on a bike. TWENTY officers had the time to devote to joining in a beatdown like this??? Sounds like a police department budget just waiting to be slashed.

      1. Not the wilds of Alaska! We already have bears to worry about. We don’t need some character out of Deliverance wandering around loose, too.

    4. Am I reading this correctly? This instance aside, if I show disrespect to a police officer, they openly believe an appropriate response is to “Taser, pepper-spray and beat” me and to call twenty more officers to join in on the fun?

      1. Proper procedures will be followed.

      2. the real fun begins w waterboarding while being sodomized w cattle-prods

      3. No, they don’t believe that’s an appropriate response. You also have to pile on made-up charges:

        “Jesse was charged with assault on a peace officer, resisting arrest, and obstructing official business.”

        The only “resisting arrest” was leaving the interview to find help as he was being yelled at. But since there’s likely no reason for the interview in the first place (other than “because I felt like it”), there’s no reason to physically detain the teen. The “official business” being obstructed was the cop yelling at a mentally handicapped teen. And the assault was “covering your face and keeping me from hitting you”.

        I don’t know why police are not held accountable when they file false charges like this. The only thing that saved him from trial was that he was judge incompetent to stand trial. They didn’t even have the decency to withdraw the charges on the basis that they were bullshit.

        1. I think you have that backwards. The “official business” was obviously the beating, and he interfered by covering his guilty, guilty face.

        2. Well in this case, the family is at least seeking civil damages. Not quite the same as the tar and feathering the cop deserves, but astart.

          1. Tar and feathering?

            This guy deserves to be locked up in jail.

            Then all the people he beat up for not showing him sufficient respect can give his the daily beat downs he deserves.

            1. Seriously. This guy should get at minimum what I would if I randomly kicked the shit out of a retarded kid for no reason. Ideally there would be significant enhancements in the penalties for a police officer committing such crimes while on duty.

              1. The job of a police officer is to harass, intimidate, extort, steal, assault and kidnap.

                Occasionally they investigate when other people commit crimes, but for the most part they just go around seeking victims.

        3. ‘peace officer”, that’s a good one!

          1. All the peace makers turn war officers.

            Hear what I say.

        4. STOP RESISTING!

      4. STOP RESISTING!!!!!!!

      5. They can if you are a black kid.….._7359g.jpg

        1. That’s actually him. I’d link to the article it is from, but the sever squirrels chopped up the link (thank goodness for “preview”).


        1. Looks like they used a pretty good portion of it. (Yes, I know what you meant.)

    5. For some reason one of the most disturbing details for me was that police ordered the neighbor, who was trying to help defuse the situation, back into his home under threat of arrest. Police have become too willing to arrest regular people, and it is ultimately going to lead to their downfall. It’s as if we’ve moved from a period where cops tended to have questionable judgement to a new era where they simply have no judgement whatsoever. Their supervisors need to start pounding it into their head that they have no business arresting normal law-abiding people, for any reason, if they want to continue avoiding scrutiny.

      1. It should be actionable every time a cop acts beyond the scope of his authority. That’s the law, of course, but it should actually be enforced.

      2. I’ve been told (by cops) that supervisors will often give poor reviews to guys with calm demeanors, for not being aggressive or dedicated enough.

        Maybe Dunphy can weigh in, if he’s around.

        1. You know, I’d be curious on what he thinks would be the best way to deal with acts outside of the scope of the job. The exclusionary rule clearly isn’t enough, and it doesn’t help at all when the victim of abuse isn’t charged with anything.

        2. The kid didn’t obey lawful orders, so he got tased. Tough shit. He need to learn to respect the law.

          1. Is this a spoof? I’m not even certain..

            1. I think so. dunphy usually aims for a conciliatory tone, except when people are personally giving him a lot of shit for having the same profession as an asshole.

    6. I did a search and can’t find any sign that the local paper, the Dayton Daily News, has any coverage of this case. Jeebus, the DDN sucks!

  13. Who do these kids think they are, greedy Capitalists? Their teachers are obviously failing at teaching them they are supposed be good little Collectivist slaves. We need to give more money to the public schools!

    1. What? Don’t you know that the evil KOCH BROTHERS are the driving force behind Big Lemonade?!! It must be stopped!

  14. Isn’t there a war on lemonade stands every other month?

    Ten bucks says that there will be no reports on how little the MN state bureaucracy’s vacation has actually effected most people. And tens of stories about how the children are suffering on account of it. Tens!

    1. Isn’t there a war on lemonade stands every other month?

      If it makes you feel any better, here are wars on Girl Scouts and pumpkin stands. Enjoy:…..ookie-tax/…

      1. that would be kinetic police activity to you swine

  15. “At no point, even after being advised of Jesse’s mental challenge/handicap by Jesse’s family and numerous bystanders, did defendant Hooper, defendant Howard, or any other police officer present, attempt to communicate with Jesse or explain in terms he could understand as to why Jesse was being chased.
    “Jesse was handcuffed and hogtied before being placed in the back of a police cruiser.
    “Jesse was charged with assault on a peace officer, resisting arrest, and obstructing official business.”


    1. Ha I almost replied to you above with that.

  16. “The Minnesota government shut down this morning after an impasse during budget talks between Democratic Gov. Mark Dayton and GOP lawmakers.”

    I would LOVE for the Federal Government to shut down. It would show people just how counterproductive the Federal Government actually is. “What!!!???!!! You mean my life is actually BETTER without parasites breathing down my neck???”

    1. When a few years ago Michigan had it’s “severe” government cutbacks, the news reported it with the hint of the apocalypse in the making. Funny thing, I never noticed a difference.

      1. The mainstream media almost always argues on the side of more money for the parasites in state capital buildings. They cannot concieve of civilized life without them.

        1. That is because most “news” is nothing more then rewritten government press releases and without the government providing the stories the reporters actually have to go out and find news and that is hard work.

      2. They apparently still have enough government to police beer labels.
        Might be time for another cutback.

      3. I love Maryland government furlough days because my commute is noticeably easier. It’s scary how many people around here are on the government dole.

    2. Looking over the list of services effected by the shut down, it would appear that balancing the state budget should be pretty simple. Contract most of these services to private companies, and problem solved.

      1. “””””State funding for K-12 schools will continue, but the state Education Department will largely be closed.”””‘

        Proving that the Education Department is not needed and does nothing that is required to actually teach children

        1. Those forms aren’t going to fill themselves out, smarty pants.

          1. Give the forms to the kids, they can color them with their crayons.

    3. fucking racetracks will close because there is no government there to regulate them

  17. FLOTILLA TO EMPIRE ISOLATION ? [21 st ] Century Civil Rights Flotilla
    [Overt Military Force]
    The Gaza Flotilla is the first step in the road to the Isolation of the
    American – Israeli Military Industrial Complex – the [EMPIRE] , it can be
    expected that once again the [PURE JEWISH STATE] will act outside of
    International Norms , seeking to place its claims to the entire of the
    Eastern Mediterranean Sea, by an overt show of military force , similar to
    the one that was seen as illegal by the government of Libya sometime
    back, just showing yet another Hypocritical stance by the [EMPIRE ].
    [The First Step to September]
    But, be that as it may, this is a first step, and Mao said that the road to the
    completion of the Six Thousand Mile journey begins with the first step, and
    so it now begins , the first step in the long march to give a people their
    rights back that were taken from them, to the establishment of a
    Palestrina State, will the [PURE JEWISH STATE] once again shed the blood
    of peace loving peoples , and the answer is YES! And, will the American
    Plutocracy of Hypocrisy once again defend its Tip of the Spear, into the
    Islamic World, without even blinking an eye, with glowing reports
    throughout its controlled media, and praise for its master [BIBI ] The Gift
    from God.
    [Flotilla to Empire Isolation]
    This is the first step towards September, and the [UN ] United Nations
    General Assembly Vote, and by its own actions [THE PURE JEWISH STATE]
    will have sealed the deal, it is said that it is working day and night behind
    the scenes to secure votes against the Palestinian State Hood Vote, but by
    its own actions will have shown that time has come for a change, the
    International Community can not allow any nation to have control of the
    Eastern Mediterranean Sea, or the subjugation of a peoples. So bring it on
    [PURE JEWISH STATE] the more blood and overt naked handed military
    force the better for the turn of events that will follow
    in September, created by the Flotilla to [EMPIRE] isolation.

    1. It’s the Flotilla in Manila.

      1. I WANT JOE Joe FRAZIER!

    2. What is this “Pure Jewish State” of which you speak? Obviously you are unaware that there are Muslims, Christians, Druze, Baha’i’s and many others who are citizens of Israel.

      1. PRIS SAYS: What is this “Pure Jewish State” of which you speak? Obviously you are unaware
        that there are Muslims, Christians, Druze, Baha’i’s and many others who are
        citizens of Israel.
        TRIATHLON REPLYS: These are not full citizens but tokens of the Pure Jewish State sector of the [EMPIRE], if the [EMPIRE] Occupied Palestine is for full citizenship then why not have a full Democratic [ONE STATE] Solution? Israel [EMPIRE OCCUPIED PALESTINE] is as much a Pure Jewish State as Apartheid South Africa was a Pure White State.

        1. You are referring to the people in the Palestinian territories. I am referring to the people in Israel itself. Even within Israel proper there are full Israeli citizens who are Muslim, Christian, Druze, Baha’i and of other faiths as well.

          1. How much is the [EMPIRE] paying you to spread these half-truths? Thirty pieces of silver, perhaps?

            1. LOL, Oh I know the Atlas I read must have been written by Zionists. I am just spouting propaganda.

              Funny thing is, I don’t always agree with all of Israel’s policies either but lately I have been finding myself defending Israel against blatantly anti-Semitic / anti-Jewish rhetoric. Israel is not run by angels ? nowhere on Earth are politicians angelic in nature. But it is surrounded by countries that are even worse and want to do it harm. I am against all governments but if I have to take sides between [as an example] Syria and Israel, I will side with Israel in a heartbeat.

        2. Once again, I have to say that as deranged as Hercules might be, I admire his formatting. It’s a nice change of pace from the no caps no punctuation losers or the ALL CAPS !!1!ELEVENTY! crowd.

    3. Oh good, HERCULE is here. I was worried that I wouldn’t have to scroll endlessly on the Morning Links’ comments today.

      1. I take it this is not his first appearance?

        1. Nope. He even replies occasionally. His knuckleballs of commentary always serve to make this place a little brighter.

          1. “knuckleballs of commentary”

        2. oh no, we’re running him for president.

          1. Like Hugo, he will have a daily tv broadcast called “Alo Herc!

          2. LORD HUMUNGUS SAYS:oh no , we’re running him for president.
            TRIATHLON REPLYS: We cannot be Preisdent-Emperor of the [EMPIRE] as We were born in Brampton, Ontario, of the [CC] Canadian Confederation and as such we are [FORBIDDEN] and barred from running under the terms of the [IMPERIAL CONSTITUTION], nor are We or have We ever been [EMPIRE] Subjects in any event. However, for [2012] Twenty-Twelve, We endorse DR. RON PAUL for Preisdent-Emperor of the [EMPIRE] and GOV. JERRY BROWN for Vice-Emperor President. HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN

            1. This person’s writing style reminds me of the Time-Cube guy. Remember him?


              1. I always enjoyed his nonsense. Especially his inability to understand that a cube has six sides, and what he’s *attempting* to describe would actually be more like an octahedron.

            2. Are you of Indian heritage? Your writing style reminds me a great deal of a friend of mind and Brampton has a huge “South Asian” population. Just curious.

            3. wait a sec – since we currently have a gay muslim kenyan as prez, we can also elect canucks…or deceased persons

              1. …or dicks

            4. sooo… has anyone seen waffles lately?

            5. “We were born in Brampton, Ontario”

              Canadian. It all makes sense now.

          3. HERC 2012!!!

  18. Dayton said. “I cannot accept a Minnesota where young people cannot afford the rising tuition at the University of Minnesota or a MnSCU campus so that millionaires do not have to pay $1 more in taxes.”

    The two sides are at odds over how to best craft a two-year budget that erases a $5 billion budget deficit.

    Yeah. $1. Because there’s 5 Billion millionaires in Minnesota.

    1. Give us just a little more time.

      1. Let me be clear. We will only raise taxes on people making over $250,000 per year. Which, by 2018, will mean all of you.

      2. You better have a cloning operation on the side.

  19. The Minnesota government shut down this morning after an impasse during budget talks between Democratic Gov. Mark Dayton and GOP lawmakers.

    I know where I’m going to get my rogue back-alley lemonade.

    Maybe I should re-phrase that…

  20. “I cannot accept a Minnesota where people with disabilities lose part of the time they are cared for by personal care attendants so that millionaires don’t have to pay $1 more in taxes,” Dayton said. “I cannot accept a Minnesota where young people cannot afford the rising tuition at the University of Minnesota or a MnSCU campus so that millionaires do not have to pay $1 more in taxes.”

    This is especially convincing if you imagine it being said in Margaret Dumont’s voice.

    1. I want everyone to go to college.

      Why are high school diplomas not worth as much as they used to be?

    2. The funny thisng is that this guy is a multi-millionaire (his grandfather founded Target) who lives off a trust fund that is located in the no-state-income-tax satate of South Dakota. NTTAWWT, but it bocomes hypocritical when he rails against the rich not paying their fair share.

      1. We’all think Ya’all ought to pay more taxes.

        1. I think y’all need a big fat carbon tax on breathing.

  21. “Dayton police ‘mistook’ a mentally handicapped teenager’s speech impediment for ‘disrespect,’ so they Tasered, pepper-sprayed, and beat him and called for backup from ‘upward of 20 police officers’.”

    Owe, my balls!!

    1. The thing that makes me most angry is that if the kid HADNT been handicapped and had just been disrespecting the cops, SO FUCKING WHAT?

      This isnt the proper response for disrespect. The proper response for disrespecting a cop is: absolutely nothing. No one has a right to respect. No one.

      1. Well, except the court. Apparently some dude subtly flipped the bird in the background during the trial of Casey Anthony in Orlando yesterday. He got 6 days in jail for contempt of court. It seems there was a $400 fine too.

        So yes, you will respect their au-thor-a-tai.

        1. I don’t have a problem with this in a court of law. Trials need to be conducted with dignity and professionalism, and if someone in the peanut gallery wants to disrupt the proceedings, throw them out.

        2. contempt is different than disrespect. And as db said, courts do need to be conducted professionally. That said, flipping off a cop or a judge OUTSIDE the courtroom should be a-ok.

      2. when people choose to refuse to stop whether on foot or in a vehicle, it’s because they have warrants. you create a perverse incentive for people to refuse lawful orders to stop if you reward such people by not stopping them.

        1. Anybody that runs is VC. Anybody that doesn’t run is a well-disciplined VC.

          I do hope this is a spoof.

  22. Kid got what’s comin’ to him. Maybe next time he’ll think twice before being born with a mental handicap.

      1. Is that a new one? I didn’t read any of the threads after 5 or so.

        1. Tulpa “coined it”

          1. Reading back over that, I now suspect Tulpa was being spoofed. He’s a contrary jerk with a poor grasp between what’s allowed by the law and what is moral, but he’s not a whiner. And he welcomes being attacked, and doesn’t withdraw and call us mean poopyheads.

        2. Read yesterday’s halal meat thread. Tulpa went all Lonewacko. AD HOMS

          1. I found that particularly amusing, since he’s mocked people for using precisely that phrase.

            1. It’s very possible that he was being spoofed, since he’s smart enough to know what an ad hominem is.

              1. It sure sounded like Tulpa in most of the comments.He didn’t deny the others as a spoof.

                1. It did, but crying about ad homs like Lonewacko is a weird thing to do.

                  1. Tulpa was riding the cotton pony.

              2. Did anyone check to see if the first letter of each word spelled out a message?

                1. Wow. It does!

                  C.I.T.I.Z.E.N.N.O.T.H.I.N.G. S.U.C.K.S.W.I.E.N.E.R.

                  How rude!

                  1. And shockingly ad hominem!

                    1. Yes, the irony is quite delicious.

  23. That retarded kid ignored a lawful order, so the police took lawful measures to subdue him. You don’t have a right to be handicapped perpindicular to traffic.

  24. I wouldn’t have beat up that retarded kid. Unless he made a pass at me!

  25. The thing about Pawlenty’s money is you know it was all from a very small group of so-called insiders. He’s got no grassroots support whatsoever. Let’s see, $5 million divided by $2500 limit; yeah, I could see just 2000 people donating to his campaign. Hell, it could be even fewer people if they each gave the max for the primaries and for the general.

    Meanwhile, Ron Paul made about the same amount from probably 100,000 donators.

  26. Anti Union law good for schools in Wisconsin.…..l-district

    1. H.A.T.E. unionz

      1. lol i no rite

  27. Of course they have to crackdown on lemonade stands. They take away business from the lemonade stands that have worked years to establish their business and pay property taxes.


  28. LEECHES!

    1. The MSNBC article about it was vicariously fellating Chavez:

      The whole article reminds me of the way people in North Korea responded to the death of Kim Il-Sung. Creeepy.

    2. I bet joe is in mourning. He probably took the day off to reflect back on the life of his hero.

      1. How can he get cancer? He was democratically elected. That totally makes him not a caudillo.

        1. joe’s deformed wife knocking on the bathroom door, asking him what’s wrong while he’s curled around the toilet, weeping and vomiting in fear for his beloved strongman is a delicious mental image.

          1. I hear she has 14 toes.

            1. Webbed toes, at that. And a giant clinis. (Peentoris?)

            2. “I hear she has 14 toes.”

              On just the one foot.

              1. Yes, but she has three feet. And a slack vag that gapes open like a mystified redneck’s mouth at a hygiene symposium.

        2. Really. They need to immediately vote for him not to have cancer. Then everything would be OK!

    3. Hope he dies from some sort of bacterial infection whilst in Cuba. I would love to see Michael Moore spin that one.

    4. Chavez will get the best treatment he can purchase with Venezuela’s oil proceeds.

      It’s likely he will survive and bolster his rule with the claim that he beat cancer. He’s just that insane.

    5. If your cancer treatment plan starts with ‘fly to Cuba’, item two on the list needs to be ‘make will’.

      1. You can probably get decent care if you’re powerful.

        1. I hear the hospitals get electricity almost 24 hours a day.


    This is bullshit. Either MSNBC needs to admi they are an arm of the White House or the White House needs to admit they strong arm the media.

    1. H.A.T.E. msnbc

    2. I think the whole thing is hilarious. He said he thought the president “was kind of a dick” during the speech. That is what everyone is bending over backwards to profess they find profoundly offensive? Really?

      But war criminal, baby killer, nazi, Hitler, racist, homophobic, sexist, traitorous, evil, stupid, senile, vacuous, etc…. those are all fine and dandy in the rough and tumble world of DC politics.

      Flipping channels on the radio last night I heard Juan Williams pretending offense and complaining the “to use reference to male genitalia in regard to the President is beyond the pale”. He was far to genteel and mannered to use the word “dick”. Everyone else danced around and wouldn’t say it either. Come on, people. Saying someone is a dick is probably less offensive than using the words “male genitalia” – as most people use the term without specific reference to its root. Just as you say something “sucks” knowing this is a reference to fellatio but really only meaning “it is bad”.

      Dick, douche, knob, tool…. they are all generic versions of “ass”, each with their own connotation. In colloquial use they are no more offensive than “jerk”.

      As proof of this false indignation, take a moment to google the phrase “Bush Sucks”. Making a homophobic reference to the president as a fellator is certainly more disrespectful than comparing the president to the male member. I don’t recall a great hue and cry about that.

      1. I thought he was commenting on how much Obama is like Nixon. No?

  30. Maybe wannabe cops should be forced to work retail for a year before they are allowed to join the academy so they learn how to deal with disrespect without resorting to tasers and beatings. Anyone who has ever worked in customer service has been called every name under the sun and somehow they still manage to do their jobs without incident.

    1. You want random shoppers and people calling customer service to be murdered?

  31. Former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty has raised this fundraising cycle roughly the same amount he raised in 2008, when nobody knew who he was.

    So who else gave Ron Paul money? I’m really annoyed that he’s giving me a little bit of optimism again, just like last time.

    1. I donated to the money bombs, but forgot to chip in again for the end of quarter thing. I’ve also got a small monthly contribution going for Johnson. Talk about flushing money down the toilet on that one.

      1. Thank you for your continued support. At RPFEC, providing comfort and false hope to libertarians is our top priority.

    2. TRIATHLON donated.

    3. Me. Meanwhile, a nice man from Johnson’s campaign called last night, so I gave him some more, too.

  32. Fourth of July is hard for vegetarians, as it should be.

    Americans was made by killing. Ergo, killing animals is patriotic, because it involves killing living creatures.

    NY Times: Doubts raised about the Strauss-Kahn accuser.

    Goddamn, if he isn’t guilty, the French will be so snooty about it.

    1. Remember, the crazy stripper in the Duke Lacrosse deal was above suspicion (even though she was lying), but this woman must be a liar. Fucking power fellators.

      1. Entirely different cases. The Duke lacrosse case involved a woman of color lying about four evil white males involved in an evil white male game. Clearly they were guilty of being evil white males even if they weren’t guilty of rape and deserved to have their lives and reputations torn to shreds by mere virtue of existing.

        DSK is different. He’s French. And a Socialist. He’s the right kind of people which makes this hotel maid of color and obvious liar and probably plant intended to trap and discredit Socialists everywhere.

  33. Texas police testing drones. Some day we will pine for the days when they just shot our dogs.…..80969.html

    1. H.A.T.E copz

      1. Fuck off, asscunt.

        1. %*&@

          1. ^^^^THIS

    2. Soon all police forces will be like the dystopian caricatures featured in 80s action movies. And all women will have big hair, tiny dogs, and spandex workout montages.

      1. How long before they have those big walker things out of Robocop?


          1. I demand an apology!

  34. Holy shit, I was completely unaware of that Halperin deal. That’s hilarious.

    The really amazing thing is, I would never have expected him to be capable of that sort of nuanced, thoughtful analysis.

    1. Then Carney calls to whine and they suspend him. Yeah, that is some real independent journalism there. And I love Carney’s “that would be inapropriate to say about any President”. Yeah, I am sure he was real torn up when people said shit about Bush. And regardless, since when does the 1st Amendment not apply to the President. What a dirtbag.

    1. It is better than that. Government inspectors inspected the pool and didn’t notice the body.…..ver__pool/

    2. …city health inspectors had visited the pool on both Monday and Tuesday and did not notice Joseph’s body. On Tuesday the inspectors tested the water and only noted the pool was “cloudy.”

      1. Well, it’s not Pool World sells a “Dead Body Test Kit.” What do you want them to do?

        1. If there’s a dead body, the water turns purple.

    3. If the details in that story are accurate, that “lifeguard” is in deep doo-doo.

      1. A Fall River municipal employee? I doubt they get in trouble for things like “not doing their job”.

  35. The EVIL Roger Ailes plan for a partisan, narrative shaping network, started in the Nixon Years.

    The third day in a row of Slate’s Michelle Bachman coverage.

    I don’t think I have ever seen this level of vitriol to a candidate this quickly. I mean, yeah, she says some dumb shit and is much too socially conservative for me, but Jesus H. do people hate this woman.

    1. It is the Palin template. They will act this way towards any candidate who stands up to the establishment. Just scream throw shit and make something stick by pure volume.

    2. Dude, there’s something about conservative females that drives them insane. Probably mommy issues.

    3. I’m sorry, I find the idea of the woman running for POTUS taking the biblical “wives be submissive to your husband” too literally a bit precious. There’s a whole case of dog-whistles to various progressive constituencies in that piece.

      1. Depends on the definition of “submissive.” (wink wink nudge nudge)

  36. The thought of equipping Wal-Mart greeters with tasers just sent a chill down my spine.

    1. They will have to be in a union now.

  37. This makes me fucking sick.

    1. SugarFreeing a link makes you fucking sick?

    2. SugarFreeing a link makes you sick? I’ve gotten used to it.

      1. Whoa.

          1. We have quantum entangled our brains! OUR BRAINS!

    3. Bad HTML coding is always puketastic.

      1. I tried a link earlier with proper HTML and it didn’t work. But I used “preview” so I didn’t fuck it up.

  38. According to the story I just read, Halperin was apparently pretty much distraught at the thought he had actually slandered the ascended One, and slobbered and groveled for the remainder of the show.


    1. The First Amendment is alive and well…so long as you criticize the right people.

  39. Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaiao starts an all-female DUI chain gang.

    Sounds like a rock band…

    1. And a good one at that.

      1. They need a better name though. Maybe “The Boozy Floozies”

  40. In other news, I got a box of gun parts in the mail yesterday.

    The “custom” 1911 project has officially commenced.

    1. If you haven’t already, pick up Kuhnhausen’s books on the 1911.

  41. I would rather issue tasers to one hundred random Walmart greeters (or retards) than to cops.

    1. That is an interesting idea. How much skill and tools does it require for such a project if I may ask?

      1. wrong thread. I mean the 1911 project not the taser for wall mart greeters.

        1. Hahahahahaha… no, I think the Taser idea is “interesting” as well. In the same way that walking through a mindfield blindfolded would be interesting.

          1. Actually wall mart greeters are always nice old people. I don’t get the hate for them.

            1. Yeah, I always try to be polite to them. What good does it do to disdain a person whose job title is “greeter?

              1. It proves my moral and intellectual superiority to WalMart greeter cattle to be rude to them.

              2. anyone working for an honest wage deserves to be treated with respect. One of the worst things to come out of the 1960s was the idea that some jobs were degrading and beneath people. A wall mart greeter is more worthy of respect than some fucking politician.

            2. I don’t hate them. I fear their vests. Especially if they’ve packing concealed Tasers.

            3. I’ve heard this before, but my local Wal-Mart seems to have a “hire the hostile” policy. Perhaps it’s an anomaly.

              1. Or maybe they just don’t like the looks of you CN.

                1. That’s certainly within the realm of possibilities.

                2. They can probably tell he reads above a -3rd grade level.

            4. Do people hate wal-mart greeters? I thought they pitied them.

              1. Yeah, I also thought it was pity.

                I thought the meme “…that guy is now a Wal-Mart greeter” was supposed to signify how former mill workers fall out of the middle class, and have to take humiliating jobs, and/or how America hates the elderly and forces them to work undignified service jobs to supplement their retirement income.

                1. I think they resent my top hat and monocle.

                  1. This may sound like total BS but a good greeter can really make a difference in my experience at wally world. I hate going there as the atmosphere reminds me of the planet venus but if the greeter is genuine and engaging i find it a little more bearable. Ohh, and fuck MNG the elitist fuck.

      2. It depends. You need to know how to fit the sear and hammer properly. Usually you have to fit the safety, trigger, and grip safety as well. Unless you buy “drop-in” parts, which usually don’t give quite the same crispness of pull as a true custom job, there’s a bit of fitting needed. But if you go and get Ed Brown’s 1911 customization guide, you can do it with care. Fitting a barrel and slide is a little more difficult than just doing the fire control group though.


    Obama really is a dickhead. What is the point of making the “my kids finish their homework” remark other than being a tool?

    1. President Dick didn’t bother to do his homework when he mailed in his disgrace of a budget.

      1. And he has never signed a budget despite his party controling Congress for the first two years of his presidency.

    2. Behind the scenes, White House officials pointedly noted that several Republicans were scheduled to hold fundraisers on Thursday as well.

      Well it’s clear they all have their priorities straight. No time to deal with the budget when you’re trying to raise funds to get elected for another term of not dealing with the budget. Reminds me of that old anti-cocaine PSA.

    3. Obama really is a dickhead. What is the point of making the “my kids finish their homework” remark other than being a tool?

      No kidding. All this guy ever does is go on vacation and play golf at Andrews AFB! Congress is a bunch of workaholics compared to this putz.

    4. That little line was very Carteresque. That’s Obama. Half Nixon, half Carter, all dick.

      1. Fatty Bolger is suspended from commenting indefinitely.

    5. So either his kids have him fooled, or his kids are kinda dumb & aren’t able to fool their super-busy father.

  43. I’m building it from commercially available parts, so it’s not like I’m whittling it out of a chunk of metal. There are a couple of special tools required, which I will make, but it’s mostly hand-fitting and “fettling” the parts.

    I just like the idea of building it myself, and everything is readily available for the 1911. I’m going cheap (this time), but you can easily spend a couple grand on parts.

    1. I like the idea of building it myself too. My older brother builds his own rifles. I have one he built and it is a wonderful weapon. A good hobby.

    2. I recommend Ed Brown’s 1911 guide for info on how to properly fit the barrel hood and link. A good link fit can make the difference between an unreliable, inaccurate gun, and a smooth tack driver. Make sure the slide contacts the barrel only on the hood. The link pin hole for the slide stop should follow the curve of the bottom barrel lug closely or you will bend and break the slide stop pin in a hundred rounds or less.

      1. Are you working toward something like this?…..n_Darkness

    3. I had an uncle who was a tool and die man. He built a pistol out of a chunk on nickle. It was beautiful.

      1. Then again, maybe it was a chunk of steel. I guess I am not sure. But it was beautiful none the less.

  44. This just in, Johnny Longtorso sited commenting on this post by a nitwit socialist.

    Garret Epps at The Atlantic: This Week’s Blaze of Notoriety for Constitution: Bad for the Republic

  45. Just so no one forgets:

    Twenty cops responded to the retard beat-down, yes? I don’t see any indication that any of them tried to stop it.

    What was that about “a few bad apples”, again?

    1. And we don’t have enough cops on the street yet twenty of them had enough time to come and watch the beatdown.

      1. It’s almost like these cops rushed to judgment without knowing wtf was really going on.

        1. Yeah, and unlike the silly back and forth on this site, their actions had real consequences.

        2. Said it before and I’ll say it again — The Tulpa of the Left.

          1. Shorter CN-How appalling that you would hold people to what they actually say and write, we’re trying to get our uninformed, assumption-filled outrage on here!

            BTW-Tulpa is one that reeeeaaally is going to have to do some walking back on this one if it pans out the way it is looking, which of course, it may not.

            1. “Shorter” usually means, you know, shorter.

              1. OK.

                Shorter CN: Careful thinkin’? We don’t need no careful thinkin!

                1. Dammit, Spock, we need action, not your green-blooded blathering!

                  1. McCoy was quite a dick, wasn’t he?

              2. Words only mean what he wants them to mean. That’s one of the powers that comes with being Dr. Dipshit, PhD. He can also bend spoons with the power of appeals to his own authority.

                1. Shorter SF: Fuck you for chiding us on our careless conclusions!

                2. He can also bend spoons with the power of appeals to his own authority.

                  Really? Because I’m tired of bending spoons the Uri Geller way. This seems much easier. MNG, do you give seminars on your spoon-bending technique?

                  1. The problem is, deciding which way to bend them before all the evidence is in.

                    1. See, most of the audience would like to see me bend the handle up, but there may be a few in the back who would prefer that I bend it down. And you can never discount the value of bending it from side to side, although that has fallen out of favor recently.
                      It’s really a conundrum, fellas!

                    2. The scary thing is, don’t you work for a newspaper? You’d think you of all people would be big on waiting to get the whole story before rushing to make half-assed assertions. Is this why my calling people on this threatens you so, it hits close to home?

                    3. Fuck that shit! I’m made a good career out of half-assed assertions!

                    4. Actually, now that I think about it, he’s more like the male rather.
                      “Love me, you stupid fuckers!”

                  2. Save your money, T. I know the shortcut. First you go get a worthless PhD from a clown college. Then you get a job that has nothing to do with that PhD (rendering an even larger waste of time and money.) Then you start trolling a message board. Now, you have to do it for years. And you have to fool yourself into thinking that people give a shit about the crap you blather on about and it helps to adopt a morally bankrupt pseudo-philosophy. After all that you can re-define words at will, bend spoons and–most importantly–dismiss a general criticism of your bullshit trolling for a particular complaint just because it’s in some random thread.

                    1. SF, it’s ok for you to admit you jumped to conclusions.

                    2. Nice deflection. It doesn’t fool any one but you, but self-delusion has always been your strong suit.

                    3. Lot’s of young people make impuslive conclusions SF, it’s ok, really. You don’t have to shoot the messenger.

                      Saying you are wrong is just to admit you are wiser today than you were yesterday.

                      This is likely going to be a delicious next couple of days.

                    4. Okay, that’s way more work than I’m willing to do for spoon bending. For that much work, I could do something with my life.

        3. Owww..Stop the beating!

          1. Oh no, oh no. Many people here jumped to conclusion and got their outrage on for days, nay WEEKS, so if it is going to blow up in their face I’m going to at least make a day of it!

            1. fap fap fap fap fap fap fap

            2. ‘Taint rape if she’s a no good drug user.
              Can’t trust a no good drug user, nope.
              Besides she probably consented or took money because she’s a no good drug user.
              Did I mention that she’s a no good drug user?

              1. Keep digging sarcy, keep digging.

                Double down, don’t retreat, re-load!

                1. I’m agreeing with you!

                  It ain’t rape if the victim is a no good drug user.

                  Her story can’t be trusted because she’s a no good drug user, therefor it didn’t happen.

                  Even if it happened she probably consented because she was high, or took money to buy drugs.

                  If it wasn’t consensual, since nobody has sympathy for a no good drug user it doesn’t matter.

                  Case closed.

                  1. Keep digging!

                    1. Use a spoon! But remember, some would use a shovel. And I hear that in New Guinea they often use crocodile skulls for excavating. So consider that, too.

                2. fap fap fap fappity Fappity FAP FAPPITY FAP!

                  1. Fuck you for chiding us on our careless conclusions!

      2. And we don’t have enough cops on the street yet twenty of them had enough time to come and watch the beatdown.


        If this happened in Chicago, 20 cops would have watched the beatdown in person and another 500 would have watched it live on video monitors.

    2. It was 22 isolated incidents simultaneously at the same address.

    3. 99% of cops give the rest a bad name.

    4. Too many cooks spoil the soup.

    5. The kid ran from the police. they were completely justified in tasing him when he refused lawful orders to stop.

    6. What’s really amazing is that the bad apples are attracted to this type of situation like moths to a flame.

      This kid must’ve drawn every bad apple for miles in every direction.

  46. What is the point of making the “my kids finish their homework” remark other than being a tool?

    And, of course, he’s lying. Homework (with the exception of a very few projects) is not assigned days in advance. You assign it to be turned in the next day. L’il Sasha and Malia can’t finish it two days in advance, because it doesn’t even exist two days in advance.

    1. And as I said above he will more than likely finish his entire Presidency without ever once completing a budget. He really is totally unself aware.

      1. obama calls himself obama

        1. It’s like having Deion Sanders for President.

    2. Maybe he meant book reports and projects? But so what – the kids take orders from Dad and Mom. I don’t see anything in Constitution requiring Congress to take orders from him. What a clueless tool – it took months for them to select a puppy but he expected Congress to pass a 2,500 page health insurance bill in a matter of days.

      1. Of course he did. He wanted to find out what was in the bill, after all.

        1. It was worse than waiting for the next Harry Potter book.

      2. I don’t see anything in Constitution requiring Congress to take orders from him.

        Nope. Congress came up with that all by themselves!

    3. It’s a little known provision of the PATRIOT act – intelligence assets inform the President of what the homework will be so his children can get a good start on it. Only costs $700 million a year, a bargain, really.

      We cannot allow a homework gap.

  47. Of course Jezebel supports fireworks bans.

    New York Times thinks Supreme Court needs to restore trust.

    Well, I’m sure upholding the individual mandate and striking down Citizens United would be a good start, followed by reversing Heller.

      1. What a bunch of nonsense. That is all.

  48. So come on John, what’s your response to the Strauss-Kahn news? Ready to take that oh-so-familiar walk?

    1. Shouldn’t you be advising him to withhold judgment until all evidence is in?

      1. Not if what I’m saying is that he should walk back from concluding his guilt.

        Logic, how does it work?

        1. Asshcunting, how does it work?

      2. Consistency is for chumps like you.

        1. Haha, I agree you have your problems with it and I think it is important.

          1. Yeah, it’s so sad that we all can’t have a toilet paper PhD in Labor Parasite Studies like you.

            1. You don’t have to have a PhD to know not to jump to conclusions based on press releases and emnity towards a person’s nationality, political orientation and/or post.

              1. And yet, at the moment, that is exactly what you are doing.

            2. AXIS OF GLIB!

    2. My take is real simple, he got lucky and chose the right victim. So what if she is a drug money launderer? Does that mean that she can’t ever be raped? His actions certainly showed a real conscience of guilt.

      If he is innocent, I have about as much sympathy for him as a do for people who get bit by Gaboon vipers after playing with them. He had a sex with a random hotel maid despite being a powerful, well known person wiht many enemies. I can’t see what good he thought would come of that.

      Beyond that I still that he is probably guilty. The maid’s problems with her past and credibility probably do create reasonable doubt and make him legally innocent. But that in no way makes him factually innocent.

      1. I currently also possess reasonable doubt that YOU didn’t rape this chick while wearing a disguise, John.

        But I guess that doesn’t mean you didn’t do it.

        1. You posses more than reasonable doubt in that case. Reasonable doubt just means that there is a possible explination for the facts in evidence that involves you not being guilty. That is it. There can be a whole lot of evidence against you. And you can be guilty as hell and still not be “legally guilty” beyond a reasonable doubt. Think of the OJ murder case. He was aquitted in the criminal trial and lost the civil trial. Assume the criminal trial was correct and there was reasonable doubt. It is entirely consistent for the civil jury to conclude that there is reasonable doubt but that by a preponderence of the evidence he was guilty. Same situation here. Her credibility problems create the reasonable doubt that she is lying. But the evidence of sex and his behavior afterwards mean he was probably guilty.

    3. Did the poor hotel maid also convince other women to come forward with allegations against the man? I wonder how much of her cut she promised them.

      1. Well, the other “accusation” against him boiled down to “He made a pass at me and I didn’t like it so I slapped him and left.”

    4. MNG I can’t understand why you would think that her friends who are too shady to get a bank account use hers has anything to do with the credibility of the rape charge.

  49. Attention everybody
    I said it ain’t hard 2 do
    U just walk, walk
    Let your body talk
    Walkin’ so cool (Walkin’ so cool)

  50. Thanks, db.

    I’ve been doing my “homework” but good info is always welcome.

  51. Cuomo pushing for fracking, NY Times readers are sad.

    Another Great Progressive Hope bites the dust.

    1. Cuomo would be a great candidate for President. He got serious concessions from the unions without gutting them, he got gay marriage passed where his predecessor could not, he made serious budget cuts while rejecting the ‘millionaire’s tax.’ He’s the kind of Democrat that should be running in these small government times, but the Democrats like to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory so, you know.

  52. PWNAGE

    We’re no match for MNG’s idiot dog savant argumentation and quibbling superpowers.

    1. Was P Brooks also caught up in the jump to conclusion game too? Whodathunk it?

  53. It was a “Jump to Conclusions” mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor… and would have different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO.

    1. On the revelation that she’s a no good drug user, the immediate conclusion is that her story is not credible.
      Not that anyone is jumping to any conclusions based upon this revelation.

      1. But I thought you were agreeing with me upthread?

        Speaking of threads, keep clutching at them. Doubling down is indeed one form of doing the walk.

        1. Did I say he was guilty?
          I don’t recall saying he was guilty.

          I’m pointing out the hypocrisy in chastising people for jumping to conclusions as you jump to conclusions.

          1. ^^^^THIS

            1. Ah, but nowhere have I jumped to the conclusion that he is not guilty. I’m chiding allt he people who jumped to the conclusion that he was guilty now that new doubts are in, and that’s not the same thing as anyone who has even flipped through a logic 101 book can tell you. And yet that is beyond you, and of course Gobby too.

              Logic, how does it work?

              1. Ah, but nowhere have I jumped to the conclusion that he is not guilty.

                By saying “You were wrong” to those who said he is guilty, the implication is that he is not guilty.

                Logic, how does it work?

              2. If you were just saying that it was wrong for them to jump to conclusions, then yes, you are right.

                But what you’re ACTUALLY doing is saying they were wrong to jump to conclusions BECAUSE of these new doubts, which assumes that the doubts are true and will cause the case to be thrown out.

                So, yes, you have jumped to a conclusion yourself.

          2. He doesn’t care that he’s wrong; he just cares about riling up us. Which he’s done.

            I apologize to the board for feeding him. It was wrong and I’m going to do my best not to from now on.

            1. Tail tucked firmly beneath his legs with his vagine, SF exits state left!

            2. Dammit, SF. We need action, not your glucose-deficient-blooded blathering!

              1. He only has the power we give him.

                1. 120 volts at 1 or 2 amps seems like a reasonable amount of power to give him.

                  1. I think John owes us for doing his work today. How many hours you think we can bill him for?

                    1. Well, it’s a respite from the usual John vs. MNG show, so there’s that. Minge takes on all-comers!

                    2. John’s a lawyer, right? They have 36 hour days…

                    3. Well MNG is a Doctor, and he has plenty of time on here.

                    4. Is MNG a real doctor? I thought he was just a Ph.D. doctor.

          3. “I don’t recall saying he was guilty.”

            Well, there is this archive search thingee, we can test that later when I get back, but off to work now.

            You may want to practice your walk while I’m gone…

            1. Good luck with your, um, “research”! Obsess much?

      2. I don’t think that’s the conclusion process here. At all.

        I think drugs should be legal, but I also acknowledge that if you’re currently in jail for selling drugs the odds are that you are a “hustler”. In other words, my pro-drugs stance does not blind me to the fact that if you’re a drug dealer it’s pretty likely you won’t stoop from committing conspiracy to commit fraud, either.

        And if you are on the phone looking for advice on how to profit from your accusation from a hustler, I might conclude that there’s enough of a chance that you’re a hustler too that I might want to doubt your story a little.

        1. All that does is create reasonable doubt and make him legally innocent. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t do it. Drug dealing hustlers get raped sometimes too. I would say that he lives a charmed life and choose just the right maid to rape. Or his enemies made a really poor choice in picking the woman to try to frame him with.

          1. Well, if you’re going to importune a false rape accusation, you have a limited pool of women you can ask.

            They could have asked anyone who posts at Jezebel, but I bet not a lot of them work as maids. If DSK had gone to some kind of Prozac conference maybe they could have gone that route, but I guess he didn’t.

            In any event, I’m just trying to point out to sarcasmic that the argument here isn’t “Anyone who uses drugs must be a liar”. It’s “If your associates are hustlers and grifters, and you ask them for advice on how to make money, maybe I kinda sorta should assume that you would be willing to make shit up to score a payday.”

            It would be particularly funny if this WAS a huge set-up, and the reason it failed was because Sarkozy’s people were too dumb to realize that their pigeon might go out with her other criminal associates to try to increase her payday.

            1. Very true. And it amazes me that he could be that stupid and craven that Sarkozy could set him up that easily. It is a simple rule if you are a powerful man “don’t fuck anyone who has less to lose that you do.”

              1. so… I can fuck just about anybody!

            2. I’m just trying to point out to sarcasmic that the argument here isn’t “Anyone who uses drugs must be a liar”

              I understand. I also am rarely serious, hence my chosen handle.

  54. P Brooks:
    I appreciate your principled opposition and rejection of threaded comments. The only reason I use them is because doing the whole copy-and-blockquote thing is immensely tedious on a smart phone.

    1. It just proves his Paleo-cred.

  55. P Brooks actually chisels his comments on stone tablets and mails them to the squirrels, who do the input.

    1. The board was much better back before threaded comments. I think it’s because we had a higher caliber of lunatic here then, though.

      1. It’s hard to get good lunatic, these days. I here there was a blight up in Montana, and it pretty much wiped out the crop.

      2. As Episiarch pointed out, serial comments keep the attention whores and trolls from commenting on multiple threads. It made it harder on them to troll every little thing anyone said. For example, could OO or the Anonotroll exist without threaded comments?

        1. Yes, we did have a higher caliber of troll as well. You and Epi might be correct that threaded comments are what allows the trolls to ruin the place.

        2. I agree. It would be too much work for them to reference everything they want to shit on.

      3. If you had said” Postrel” I could have started early. Im MDT remember!

  56. I apologize to the board for feeding him. It was wrong and I’m going to do my best not to from now on.

    Sometimes, when he drops that nasty slobbery slimy stick at your feet, and looks expectantly up at you with those big doggy eyes and wags his tail; it’s hard to resist.

  57. Former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty has raised this fundraising cycle roughly the same amount he raised in 2008, when nobody knew who he was.

    Wait. Who is he again?

  58. Penguins withdraw offer to Jagr

    1. Am I a fool to be hopeful about the Jackets’ chances with the addition of Wisniewski and Jeff Carter?
      Really, at this point I’d settle for a freaking playoff appearance and a win or two in the first round.

  59. Happy Canada Day, you hosers…..le2083432/

    1. Take off! To the Great White North!
      Take off! It’s a beauty way to go.
      Take off! To the Great White North!

      1. and here is William Shatner singing O Canada…..anada.html


          I am feeling much better now.

        2. Just ran across that on BuzzFeed and posted it on my blog. I mean, come on, it’s the Shat!

  60. common, do not fight with lemonade stands!

  61. I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by fed3x. I will never again pay expensive r3tailprices at stores.I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff, buzzsave. c0m……

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