Reason Morning Links: Mideast Protests Spread, Berlusconi to Face Trial, Obama Budget Hit From the Left

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NEXT: Loco Over Four Loko

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  1. I wonder how Obama plans to handle Iran round II? More ass kissing of “The Supreme Leader”?

    1. Yeah. It’s just absolutely pathetic that Hillary Clinton feels like she has to show leadership on the Iran issue because her boss doesn’t give a crap.

    2. He is busy Wishing Mohammad a happy birthday, celebrating Mawlid al-Nabi.*

      *Tried to add the Arabic script but racist reason only allows English script.

      1. In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

        Instead of sitting around on the internet all day, posting pointless messages about “freedom” and abusing yourselves to pictures of loose women, why not do something productive and surrender your lives to Allah?

        Western society has become decadent, weak, and lazy, and is soon to collapse. The upcoming generation, people such as yourselves, want nothing more from life than to grow fat sitting around on computers all day, masturbating, drinking, and taking drugs. You are encouraged in this behavior by corrupt politicians and absent new age parents while your societies and economies collapse around you. Meanwhile the Muslim Ummah, or brotherhood, grows rich on oil wealth and trains its upcoming generation to serve Allah, and to fight, willing to give their lives if necessary for the cause. The 19 hijackers of 9/11 have surely earned their place in paradise as do the suicide bombers who strike daily into the heart of the devil state of Israel. We are living among you, in Europe and America, and we are outbreeding you day by day, slowly taking over.

        Allah has a plan for each of us. He means us all to be good Muslims and live by his rules, as set out to the Prophet Muhammed (pbuh). Your sinful lives and wicked ways go against His plans, and you will be tortured for eternity in hell for your iniquities. Repent now and revert back to the one true faith.

        Where your joke of a faith, which no one in your society believes in anyway, tells you to love, be tolerant, and turn the other cheek, the Quran teaches us to “Kill the unbelievers wherever you find them, capture and besiege them and prepare for them every kind of ambush.”

        It also says “Against them make ready your strength to the utmost of your power, including steeds of war, to strike terror into (the hearts of) the enemies, of Allah and your enemies”.

        How can you hope to win your futile so called ‘war on terror’ against us? You have become weak, and no longer willing or able to fight. You even elected a pacifist president with Muslim sympathies to try and placate us. It’s only a matter of time until we win. Even now your soldiers contine to die on the battlefields of Afghanistan, and for what? The moment you leave, it will be back to traditional Sharia law. Your technological advances count for nothing if all you do with them is watch porn and play video games. We will continue our jihad on the west, to maim and kill those who oppose or insult us. See the truth for what it is and revert to Islam immediately. It is your only hope of survival.

        Abu Akil Walid ibn Tarekh al-Hindi

        1. “people such as yourselves, want nothing more from life than to grow fat sitting around on computers all day, masturbating, drinking, and taking drugs. ”

          I told you guys to physically disable those web cams.

          1. Tim, cameras or no, I like the sounds of that sittin around masturbatin, drinkin and takin drugs thing. Where do I sign up?

            1. I approve of this message.

            2. Its the American dream.

        2. Re: Waldi Al-Hindi,

          Instead of sitting around on the internet all day, posting pointless messages about “freedom” and abusing yourselves to pictures of loose women, why not do something productive and surrender your lives to Allah?

          We already surrendered our lives to Allah – posting naked pictures of loose women on the internet while espousing freedom is part of the paradise we were promised.

          Not that somebody would not appreciate 72 virgins, but a virgin is not known for the best sex ever, so…. I prefer MY paradise, Allah be praised.

        3. Or just visit the blog. It is Mawlid al-Nabi from sunrise to sunset there.

        4. You have to do that whacky “lu-lu-lu” tongue thing now.

          1. I have “lu-lu-lu” tongue thing” rage.

            Holy fuck, when the news drones stick a camera in the face of one of those trilling cows, it’s all I can do to not shoot the tee-vee.

        5. P.S. Walid are you a Sunni or a SHiite? Which is the true path?

          1. Which is the true path?

            I thought it was Presbyterianism.

            1. But only Mormons get into heaven… even though God is a Buddhist.

          2. Enough of this innuendo, can we get the skinny on the Code Pink-Hamas effort to create the Islamic Socialist Caliphate?

          3. I am the true path.

            1. Then AC DC’s gonna walk all over you…

          4. Neither. The Khawarijite path is the true form.

            1. Did Reason censor your original comment? I see a large gap between Suki and all the responses.

        6. We are living among you, in Europe and America, and we are outbreeding you day by day, slowly taking over.

          Sorry, dude – you cannot outbreed young Latina (and very Catholic) women. We Mexicans will outbreed YOU.

          1. Yeah, but since half the latinos will grow up to be gang-bangers and wind up dead or in prison with their very own MSNBC weekend lockup show, won’t that cancel out the numerical advantage?

            1. Re: Spoiler Alert,
              No if through education we teach our Latino men that La Virgencita is in peril if we allow Muslims to outbreed us – THAT will do the trick!

              1. Just bring back the Order of Santiago.

                1. Re: Brett L,

                  Admission to the order is determined if the applicant has noble ancestry.

                  Bad deal, my ancestry was not noble. Kind and mild mannered to be sure, just not noble.

                  1. I figure just about everyone who has a hispanic surname can claim noble bastardage since the order was founded in 1171. Or we could democratize.

        7. Don’t forget the child-rape! Wheeeeee!

        8. Yeah? Well China is going to KICK YOUR ASSES!

          1. For much of Modern history, China’s top generals have been Hui.

    3. Ah conservatives. Bombing Iran would have done such wonders with our budget woes…

      1. No instead lets not support a popular movement against one of the worst regimes on earth in the name of “stability”.

        So anyone who thinks Obama ought to be less of a crapweasel the next time there is a popular uprising in Iran now wants to bomb them?

        Seriously MNG, is there any regime on earth liberals won’t defend provided they are sufficiently anti-American?

        1. WTF? Are talking about the silence on Egypt at CPAC and among the GOP?

          1. You know what we are talking about MNG, we are talking about Obama’s horrific performance during the Iranian uprising. And he was no better this time. I would encourage you to read British Historian Niall Fergason’s piece in Newsweek. He describes how Obama, because he has all the depth of a birdbath, has managed to alienate everyone from the Egyptian people to the Saudis to the Israelis on this.

            And lastly, start thinking and stop fucking yelling “They did it to”. It is just fucking pathetic.

          2. Egypt =/= Iran. Iranians are in far worse shape than the Egyptians were. In fact, the Iranian gov’t is a worst-case scenario of how Egypt might work out. Ergo, if you could only support one revolution, it should be Iranian one.

  2. Now: sidewalk rage.

    On Facebook, there’s a group called “I Secretly Want to Punch Slow Walking People in the Back of the Head” that boasts nearly 15,000 members.

    Journalists have finally crossed the border into Retardville by citing Facebook groups as meaningful entities. What next…tweets?

    1. “Follow Reason on The facebook, Twiitter, blah blah”

        1. I’m fascinating! Who wants to follow me?

          1. We will follow you in the pit of Hell, dog!

      1. Can I get the icon in cornflower blue?

        1. [sheeck, sheeck]

    2. I bet Trevor Gilles and Matt Martin are members. Oh, sorry, I misread that as, “I secretly want to sucker punch opposing players in the back of the head, then taunt them while they are receiving treatment.”

      1. Those guys deserve bonuses.

        1. Those guys deserve bonuses.

          For what, another season at the bottom. Fuckers can’t even goon it up without being bitches. Godard should of stayed on the bench and let Johnson beat Haley’s ass like he did to DiPietro.

          1. Haley and Gillies really can’t be blamed for the Islanders’ position in the standings.

            If the Islanders played every game like they played against the Penguins [not just the goonery, but the general intensity] they would be a playoff team.

            Right now, the Islanders are where the Tampa Bay Rays were a few years ago: a young team everyone smacks around and considers an easy win. But like the Rays, they’re likely about to break out in a big way, if they can stay healthy and keep the team together long enough to do it. But they need “statement” games between now and then, just like the Rays did.

            Nobody was more surprised than the Yankees and Red Sox when the Rays suddenly wanted to brawl over every slight, and then put a competitive team on the field.

            1. If the Islanders played every game like they played against the Penguins [not just the goonery, but the general intensity] they would be a playoff team.

              I needed a good laugh this morning and you provided it. Y’all can’t even make the salary minimum because no one wants to play in a shithole for a shithole team. Garth Snow and Kim Jong-Il make the p-burgh Pirates seem like a well oiled machine.

              Congrats on winning against an AHL team, though.

              1. Congratulations on your franchise bankruptcy.

                How’s Pittsburgh doing on that program to knock abandoned buildings and factories and shit down and turn it into green space?

                BTW, the Islanders have lost more man games to injury than the Penguins this year.

                1. I accuse you of using the puckdaddy message board talking points below, and you don’t disappoint.

                  Let’s see you mention PA’s decline in industry, check(even though this area has one of the lowest unemployment rates in the country). I fucking hate Pittsburgh, don’t make me defend it again.

                  You threw in the Bettman conspiracy angle(which you use an excuse for the islanders trying to hurt other players when they are not looking), check. Who the fuck were the Islander players sticking up for with their chickenshit performance, exactly?

                  Of course you didn’t forget that the Pens were once bankrupt(and saved by Le Magnifique, who isn’t allowed to talk of team matters because he once left the penalty box OMG!).

                  Haven’t hit all the notes yet, so I’ll save you some time.

                  islesfan’83: Sidney Crysby sux!

                  islesfan’83: teh MattCooke!

                  There now you don’t have to go scouring message boards for more worn out insults…again-Joke.

      2. April 8th, I cannot wait.

        1. Neither can I.

          BTW: Given the fact that Mario once left the penalty box to get into a fight, he really should shut his yap.

          1. Oh he did? Once? Wow, I guess he, as an owner, should never call out chickenshit cheapshot artists because he left the bench one time like 30 years ago to fight.

            Why not bring up Matt Cooke and use all of the talking points that you learned on puckdaddy this morning…joke.

            1. That’s right, he shouldn’t.

              And you know what else?

              I’ve been watching this game long enough to remember Mario’s first week in the NHL. And you know what he did?

              The first time anyone messed with him he threw down the gloves and kicked the guy’s ass.

              The bottom line is this: the NHL has been notorious for favoritism for many years now. Heck, decades. If you’re not on one of the favored franchises or one of the marquee players, you don’t matter. Ovechkin could take a butcher knife on the ice with him and cut up any Islander he wanted and get a four game suspension MAX. The league routinely refuses to review incidents committed when “Who cares? It’s just the Islanders.” Hell, recently they even waived a guy’s automatic one-game suspension, because the next game was against the Islanders, and who the hell cares if you enforce the rules when someone’s playing that crappy team, right?

              Every last man on the Islanders knows that Colin Campbell and Gary Bettman don’t give a shit what happens to them, and that only their teammates do. So all of this “Wah wah wah” stuff means dick to me, and to them too, I’m sure.

    3. Retardville – isn’t that a Facebook game?

      1. If it isn’t, it should be. I’m forming a group! Who wants to be my friend? We can tweet and shit!

  3. In Bahrain, where a Sunni Muslim ruling family governs a Shiite Muslim majority, the government recently offered 1,000 dinars (about $2,650) to each family as a means of offsetting economic complaints.

    So who’s protesting in Bahrain? As Americans we understand that free money is one of the keys to domestic fat & happy. I won’t believe it’s the Muslim men who are sacking up and taking on the government. It has to be a women’s or worker’s revolt to really make it happen.

    The best thing about these uprisings is the shaking up of class and society. As each dictator falls, the patriarchy loosens his grip on the marginalized peoples of the world.

    1. Re: Sarah Korneberg,

      I won’t believe it’s the Muslim men who are sacking up and taking on the government. It has to be a women’s or worker’s revolt to really make it happen.

      You’re such a good humorist!

    2. As Americans we understand that free money is one of the keys to domestic fat & happy.

      No, that’s called welfare, rent-seeking, and in the cases of wealth redistribution schemes, theft. Perhaps a review of Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac, TARP and the Stimuli are in order?

      Or should we start with GE?

      1. are == is. Damn subject/verb agreement.

    3. Re: Sovereign Immunity

      I’m starting to come around to the idea that wealth redistribution can be problematic. But is corporate welfare really the same as cutting a check to each family? Also is the Bahrain money even tax money? Wasn’t stolen from the people or is it just the filthy lucre of a petro-state?

      In Kuwait, Bahrain, UAE, it isn’t the people who have real grievances, hell it isn’t even the women (eh, sorta) It’s the immigrant workers who are denigrated to the bowels of society and stripped of their means.

      Who build the pyramids of Dubai?

      1. Re: Sarah Korneberg,

        I’m starting to come around to the idea that wealth redistribution can be problematic.

        Starting???
        He he he!!

        But is corporate welfare really the same as cutting a check to each family?

        But are red herrings flying today?

        Also is the Bahrain money even tax money?

        Yes, the red herrings are plentiful, the catch bountiful.

        Who build the pyramids of Dubai?

        When Israel was in Egypt’s land
        Let my People Gooooooo.
        Opressed so hard they could not stand,
        Let my people Gooooo.

      2. But is corporate welfare really the same as cutting a check to each family?

        Rent-seeking is rent-seeking. The is no difference without distinction. It is merely a multiplier effect.

        Also is the Bahrain money even tax money? Wasn’t stolen from the people or is it just the filthy lucre of a petro-state?

        False equivalency. The country is an autocracy. They get scraps whenever the mood strikes the benevolent leader. Authoritarian command economies are so efficient huh? They are quite fortunate to be sitting on a vast reservoir of decayed dino carcasses.

        In Kuwait, Bahrain, UAE, it isn’t the people who have real grievances, hell it isn’t even the women (eh, sorta) It’s the immigrant workers who are denigrated to the bowels of society and stripped of their means.

        Dhimmitude sucks.

      3. Corporate welfare as defined by…?

    4. The best thing about these uprisings is the shaking up of class and society. As each dictator falls, the patriarchy loosens his grip on the marginalized peoples of the world.

      While I’m pretty sure your life centers around penises, which is one of the great ironies of militant feminists, I think people tend to revolt against tyranny. Well, at least that’s what history, when not viewed from the penis skew, tends to show.

    5. Men aren’t workers?

    1. Thank goodness the circuit breakers took it off line.

      1. Oats are a gateway to child molestation!

        1. Like you can even get it up. Bwahahahahaha!

  4. Berlusconi to face trial on charges of paying for sex with an underage prostitute, abuse of office.

    He paid for sex with an underage prostitute? To whom? Another prostitute that takes underage prostitutes as currency instead of regular cash???

    1. 2500 years of Roman tradition down the drain.

    2. Do Italians even have money? I thought they still had a barter system where pasta is traded for hand-jobs.

      1. You’re the reason that Walid al-Hindi hates us.

        1. His name doesn’t sound very Italian.

          1. I like your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

          2. It ends in a vowel, close enough.

          3. That’s true. There’s no W in the Italian alphabet.

            1. Then how the fuck do they spell Wop?

              1. Or “Wario”?

                1. Or “Watsamattayou”?

      2. Their army is still paid in salt, key ingredient when preparing pasts.

      3. Hmm, what could I get for a cup of rigatoni?

      4. Coming to pay cable in the Fall: “Berlusconi: Blood and Sand”

      5. Just two days ago I bragged that when the shit hits the fan, I’m going to use my twice-used pasta machine to make spaghetti for the neighborhood. Good to know what it will get me.

    3. If sex with a girl that looks like she is 25 enrages a nation, why isn’t an eyebrow even raised at the Catholic church and all of the alleged cases of abuse there?

      Fuckin’ Eye-talians, how do they work?

      1. enrages a nation

        I don’t think the Italians are enraged. I believe the medical term is gossip boner frenzy.

        1. Sorry, I mixed up my hyperbolic adjectives. Your’s is much more accurate. Although the article mentioned a protest of 500k; if that many women are outside the prime minister’s office, who’s at home making the pasta?

      2. Ever since they hung Il Duce from a lamp post, bringing down the government has pretty much been a major Italian sport. It isn’t about sex.

      3. Fuckin’ Eye-talians, how do they work?

        Have you seen the Italian economy? Mostly, they don’t. (I kid, I kid.)

        1. Fuckin’ work, how does it work?

          How’s that for meta!!

  5. “A lot of us have ‘shoulds’ in our head,” says Dr. Deffenbacher. Ragers tend to think people should do things their way, and get angry because the slow walkers are breaking the rules of civility. It’s unclear exactly why some people harbor such beliefs, Dr. Deffenbacher says.

    Ratbagging teafuckers!

    1. The same dynamic is at work here.

    2. Actually, this is a case of excessive empathy.

      The tree-huggers love to use empathy as a buzz word, because they assume that having an ability to read the emotional states of others and put yourself in their shoes [and that’s what empathy actually is] will invariably lead to peace, love and understanding.

      The problem is that sometimes when you read another person’s emotional state, the text reads: “Fuck you, I can walk as slow as I want, and if you don’t like it you can kiss my ass.” And reading that text makes you want to beat the shit out of the person.

      While driving, I know that if I’m being tailgated and refuse to pull over so that the faster traffic can get by, I’m thinking to myself, “Fuck you, drivers who want to go faster. I’m going to deliberately sit here, to demonstrate to you how little respect I have for you, and how much I want you to go fuck yourself. I could pull over, and usually I do, but I’m choosing specifically to sit here in this lane on this occasion because you have annoyed me and I am fucking with you on purpose to punish you.” Now, if someone behind me had a lot of empathy, and could successfully read my emotional state at that moment, what do you think they’d want to do?

      1. I, for one, would either slow down or pass you. It’s not rocket science.

        And screw tree-huggers with a rusty chainsaw. I hope they feel my empathy.

        1. Yes, those would be mature and sensible responses.

          But you would be overlooking the insult directed at you by the other person, and choosing to be tolerant.

          I’m just addressing the whole “Huh? Wha? Why would people harbor such beliefs?” nonsense from Dr. Deffenbacher quoted by P Brooks.

          For a shrink he really seems pretty clueless. “People become agitated when they perceive that someone is insulting them.” – Don’t they teach that at shrink school? And the perception is actually valid; the ragers need to be taught to suppress or ignore or rise above their valid perception that other people are deliberately fucking with them.

          1. Or perhaps the ragers need to realize the world doesn’t fucking revolve around them.

            The difference between an adult and a child is when that realization is achieved.

            1. Or perhaps the ragers need to realize the world doesn’t fucking revolve around them.

              That idea makes me very angry.

              1. Good. I was fucking with you. Isn’t empathy all puppies and unicorn farts?

            2. You have insufficient empathy.

              But see? In this case, that’s a good thing.

              That’s my whole point.

              You aren’t in touch with what the people around you are thinking about you. You fail to pick up on their social cues. And because of that failure, you’re better positioned to live with them in peace.

      2. I am amazed at the amount of communication drivers can render unto each other. The things that piss me off the worst are the drivers who seem completely oblivious to those around them. Particularly, old people and asian women.

        Also, screw tree-huggers with a rusty chainsaw Oh come on, it’s not like they hurt anyone with their batshit stupidity. They do plenty to themselves, pfftt, empathy.

        1. Re: Sarah Korneberg,

          Particularly, old people and asian women.

          Oh, burka-clad women! They’re a menace! I live in Houston, so I know!

          1. I’d worry more about fiery latinas who park their cars on men’s heads when they get pissed off if I still lived in Houston. Or has that fad passed?

            1. fiery latinas who park their cars on men’s heads

              If that’s a euphemism, and I hope it is, sign me up!

              1. Sadly, no. There was a spate (3 or 4) in a 6 month period in the mid-oughts where women of latin descent ran down men in fits of rage. The most famous one was the wife of the dentist who caught him coming out of a hotel where he’d been cheating, ran him down, backed up the Mercedes, and left it in park on his head. With his daughter in the car.

      3. As Sarah pointed out, I have a problem with the people who don’t know what the hell is going on around them. There are examples of slow people not moving over for faster traffic; but there are far more examples of people who aren’t even aware of faster traffic behind them. That’s why distracted driving is a huge factor in so many accidents. People just don’t pay attention when they are driving.

        Regarding speeding, I can drive a hell of a lot safer than the people I’m passing. It’s them driving slow in both lanes and clogging up any flow of traffic that is more hazardous than my going 10 mph over the limit.

      4. “Fuck you, I can walk as slow as I want, and if you don’t like it you can kiss my ass.”

        Ahh the ghetto street crossing mentality. Yes I know racist, but spend a little time in the ghetto and you too will know exactly what I mean. Maybe it’s just the low pants and lack of geometry skills that stops some thugs from crossing the street perpendicularly and in a timely manner.

    3. Trying to get through a college campus in the snow makes this come up a lot.

  6. Wife of Rep William Lacy Clay (the person who lied about Tom DiLorenzo’s background during a hearing last week) was so charming to announce, through the media, to his wife, that he’s divorcing her…

    http://www.politico.com/blogs/…..media.html

  7. It has to be a women’s or worker’s revolt to really make it happen.

    Don’t you have some knitting to attend to?

    1. It has to be a women’s or worker’s revolt to really make it happen.

      Provided, of course, that they are lead by the appropriate Vanguard of the Proletariat.

      Which, oddly, always seems to be made up of middle and upper class men.

      Who, weirdly, generally wind up exercising power pretty much like the Evil Tyrants they “overthrew”.

      1. When was the last time you saw either Gloria Steinem, Babs Streisand, or Jane Fondle date a guy with less money and power than themselves.

        Even The-Smartest-Woman-In-The-World(tm) didn’t come into real prominence post grad until she attached herself to a certain charming, bloated chubby chasing meatsack…

        It’s not weird RC: Girls marry up.

    2. And we wonder why H&R doesn’t have very many women… *sigh*

  8. Rep William Lacy Clay informed his wife that he will divorce her… through the media, not face to face:

    http://www.lewrockwell.com/blo…..78662.html

    (Sorry, the direct link was blocked by whatever spam filter H&R is using…)

    1. Ah, the Guliani! Cold, baby, cold…

      1. I love his style.. It’s so… it’s so… so… Gingrich.

        http://www.politicsdaily.com/2…..ast-wives/

    2. He represents North County above HWY 40 and Saint Louis, not exactly a hub of budding geniuses and thinkers. Most of the common sense moved west and south.

  9. Berlusconi to face trial on charges of paying for sex with an underage prostitute, abuse of office.

    If her name is Aysha, he is just pandering to Islamists.

  10. I don’t have sidewalk rage, I have people standing in the entrance rage. I can always get around someone on the sidewalk. There ought to be a law…

    Something better than the fire codes, something with prison time.

    1. I hate women with shopping carts who stop to chat about their pointless lives and block the aisles. One day I used my own cart to push one of their parked carts out of the way, so I could proceed. The looks I got! The end.

      1. In muslim countries you could rape those unsecorted whores. Convert now and every trip to Sam’s club will be an Arabian Night of hot, erotic jihad action.

        1. I ain’t converting unless there’s stonings and beheadings afterward so I can upload the video to my Facebook page and tweet all about it to my followers.

        2. Muslim men are the worst sackless cowards in the world. It takes a real man, a whole person to treat a woman as an equal.

          1. Re: Sarah Korneberg,

            It takes a real man, a whole person to treat a woman as an equal.

            It takes a REAL man not to be affraid of my wife. So I beat you all to the end!

            1. LOL – ^^this^^ OM! Your wife and my wife must be cut from the same cloth!

          2. Muslim men are the worst sackless cowards in the world. It takes a real man, a whole person to treat a woman as an equal.

            But men and women aren’t equal–by design. So why should they be treated as such.

            All men are created equal, we have all the same parts. Women, however, are engineered differently. They tend to be more emotional than logical, they are physically weaker than men, and if they become pregnant they can be out of commission for 5-7 months.

            Don’t get me wrong. I love women. I treat them with respect and at times affection. I give them equal opportunity to speak their mind, and I listen to their opinions, but I don’t treat them as equal.

            I’m not opening doors for every guy I see as I do for women. I’m not pulling out the chair for my buddy when we go out to eat. In our society women are put on a pedestal. Are you saying you want off that and men should treat you equally? Or are you trying to make the case that women are somehow seen as lower than men?

            1. Insisting that men and women are “equal” is like insisting that poodles and pit bulls are equal. Men and women should–and do–have the same civil rights, but they are no more “equal” than red is to orange.

  11. As each dictator falls, the patriarchy loosens his grip on the marginalized peoples of the world.

    *presents mean face*

  12. Guilty verdict in the Minuteman[sic] murder trial.

    “Be mindful
    of the company you keep,
    for some internet mag
    may declare you guilty
    by mere association.”

    [Disclaimer: I don’t like the Minutemen, but I hate free innuendo even more.]

  13. BTW: How dare those Iranian MP’s call for the execution of opposition figures?

    Who do they think they are – Sarah Palin?

    1. An attack on conservative darling Palin and a reference to Iran, when Suki starts her rant-a-thon I blame you fluffy.

        1. I am so going to walk slow in front of you!

          1. Provocateur!

      1. Godless one you shall die in anguish!

      2. Strange, I read it as an attack on the absurd characterization of Palin’s statements.

        It’s not like Palin is Paul Kanjorski (D-PA), who actually did call for an opposing politician to be put up against the wall and shot.

  14. Obama budget rankles the left.

    “I’m sorry, but do we care? Are we caring about this?”

    A better headline would read “Irrational Absurdity of New Normal Fails to Register With Statists and Other Slavers.”

    1. Even better would be: “Budget baseline increased. Women, children and minorities hardest hit.”

    1. ..and turn our sons gay.

    2. That is possibly the greatest headline/tease in the history of….2011 anyway. Awesome

    3. Can we get a cage match between Hercule and Abu Akil?

    4. Should I just assume this link was going to the Golden Girls article?

    5. Thank you Johnny for brightening my day. My wife thinks i’m out of my mind as I sit here giggling uncontrollably.

  15. For instance, instead of thinking about how much of an idiot the pedestrian is and how he shouldn’t be allowed on the sidewalk, imagine the person is lost or confused, or simply doesn’t see you

    In other words, think about what an idiot he is. Rather than lumping him in with a mass of faceless run-of-the-mill idiots, contemplate the depth and breadth of his idiocy. Personalize his idiocy.

    Then, punch him in the back of the head. The satisfaction will be that much more intense.

    1. There are people with diminished lung capacity, atrophied muscles and other maladies not discernible to the naked eye who have the sheer audacity to walk slowly on the sidewalk, slowing down their betters, we healthy folk.

      And if that isn’t bad enough, these selfish asshole walk even slower down the halls of the hospitals, trailing their IVs and oxygen tanks, completely oblivious to all of the inconvenience they impose on healthy visitors like me.

      Fuck ’em.

    2. And now what should a lost or confused person do? Perhaps…step aside? Out of my fucking way? And open his eyes while he’s at it.

  16. Obama blah, blah, useless blah, blah…

  17. You don’t understand, rankling the left is EXACTLY what Obama 2012 wants. He’s trying to pull a Clinton, first with the tax cut deal, now this. Suggest enough cuts to piss off the far left (who will not support his eventual opponent in 12) but not enough to alarm independents. He’s loving that rankle.

    1. And the left knows this, which is why their “outrage” is completely contrived to make it look like Obama has gone to the center.

    1. Gee, I don’t know: open your eyes in public, maybe?

    2. ^
      I see dead masturbators.

      1. Throw water on them!

    3. Serious question: Some of you call masturbating fapping, correct? Then, can a girl fap?

      I maintain that feminine fapping is both possible and healthy. Everyone touches themselves and I think fapping is a wonderful word for it.

      1. Re: Sarah Korneberg,

        Serious question: Some of you call masturbating fapping, correct? Then, can a girl fap?

        Maybe, but she can also wap, tap and cap.

      2. Considering that “fap” is onomatopoeic, I suppose it would largely depend on the anatomy and skill of the girl in question.

        1. You should see how far I can shoot a ping-pong ball!

          1. Didn’t you used to be called “Rather”?

            1. That was low! Why didn’t you just call her a juggalo instead?

          2. Sarah, if you really want us to see your prowess there is youtube…

      3. Then, can a girl fap?

        Girl, we need to have a talk…

      4. Sure, why not?

    4. *presses nose to hit n run and inhales deeply*

      That smells like semen!

      1. ** face turns red and he runs from the room **

    5. This Page Cannot Be Displayed

      Based on your corporate access policies, access to this web site ( http://christwire.org/2010/05/…..sturbator/ ) has been blocked because the web category “Tasteless & Offensive” is not allowed.

      If you have questions, please contact your corporate network administrator and provide the codes shown below.

      I suppose it’s for the best…

    6. Science, SF, you are a freak. How in the hell do you find such stuff?

      Countless couples have been destroyed by porn addiction, many other men have just given up on the idea of marriage because they prefer to pleasure themselves whenever they choose, free from the interruptions of family life.

      I wonder if any married men have “given up on the idea of marriage” once the sex ends, or is greatly reduced? Nah, teh pron made me do it!

      1. Yesterday’s Morning Links mentioned Christwire. It’s a beautiful website and Stephenson Billings is a god.

        I started crying when I saw this:

        http://i42.tinypic.com/sqi2ic.jpg

        1. As much as I despise Snookie, I’d still take her over the scarecrow with the hideous rictus for a smile.

    7. it has been known to lead to such dire scenarios as retarded ejaculation

      Well, duh.

      1. “retarded ejaculation” would be an excellent name for a rock band

    8. I love the side by side celebrity comparisons. They can tell just by looking that Matt Damon does not masturbate.

    9. I’m fapping right now!!

    10. Christwire: This is how heathens really believe Christians think.

    11. Bonus footage:

      Pot Smoking Radicals Are Using the Internet to Turn America Into a Socialist Sex Utopia
      .

      “Yet young people will do anything for this grungy skanky weed. They will lie and cheat. They will steal car stereos or trade their delicate, yearning bodies to bearded ex-cons. They will flirt with biker gangs or cruise skid row.

      And once they grab hold of a bag of this deadly drug, they become paranoid and greedy, often turning to violence to knock off their fellow addicts so they will have more for themselves. To do their smoking, teens and 20-somethings seek out the very places that a serial killer would likely prowl? empty parking lots and abandoned buildings…”

      Bonus Bonus:

      About The Author:
      Stephenson Billings is an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children’s Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package!

  18. New crime invented!

    Student Arrested For Returning Property He Found In The Street.

    http://www.express.co.uk/posts…..ing-honest

    1. Kiddies: Don’t talk to the police! Ever!

      1. I was seriously hassled by the pigs when I turned in a wallet (with 50 bucks in it) to a passing squad car.

        It was one of many unpleasant encounters I’ve had with the po.

    2. Chilling phrase: “But officers arrested him for ‘theft by finding'”

    3. Ok, let’s cut them some slack here! After all, after the Great Gun Ban of the 90s, Britain ran out of criminals and now the police are idle, so what are they going to do?

    4. Now they have his DNA in their system. It almost seems like they made up a crime for the sole purpose of swabbing his cheek or collecting his stool or whatever. What fuckers.

      1. That was my first thought, but it doesn’t seem to weigh on the mind of the commentators there.

        At least a few of them realize that “fuck the police” is a valid thought. Where are my PG Tips?

    5. Wow. It does, sadly, confirm the wisdom of the old advice: never, ever come to the attention of the authorities in any way at all.

    6. Chief Superintendent Ian Pilling said: “We are reviewing the circumstances of the arrest.”

      Fast forward two months –

      In a news conference today, Chief Superintendent Ian Pilling said “After a thorough internal investigation it has been determined that the officers acted properly and in accordance with established procedures”.

  19. Nice to see so many people finally fed up and actually DOING something about it.

    http://www.privacy-online.au.tc

  20. The Germans have swiped our stock exchange!

    The Chinese are gonna be pissed.

  21. New protests break out in Iran, Algeria, Bahrain, Libya, and Yemen.

    And in Iraq

  22. This whole pedestrian rage thing is all because no one says “Excuse me” any more. If people are in your way, say “Excuse me” and then if they don’t move just kick them in the heels until they do. And conceal carry.

  23. Sidewalk rage? Supermarket rage? Why the attempt to make it sound irrational and pathological? The simple fact is that people walk too fucking slowly. Because really? I don’t avoid malls out of a fashionable disdain for that lefty bogeyman “rampant consumerism.” I don’t pass up buffets and salad bars because I’m afraid of a contagious “obesity epidemic.” I don’t limit my trips to WalMart to Sunday mornings at 7 because I love the early morning air. Nope. I have enviably low blood pressure and a relatively clean criminal record, and I aim to keep it that way. Avoidance may be less morally edifying than silent suffering or pure hearted empathy, but it’s a hell of a lot more practical and pleasant.

  24. “For those for whom anger is a personal problem, we’re trying to develop and evaluate ways of helping them.”

    NO!! It is YOU who are wrong!!

  25. “To all those under 30 who worked so hard to get this man elected, know this: he just screwed you over. He thinks you’re fools. Either the US will go into default because of Obama’s cowardice, or you will be paying far far more for far far less because this president has no courage when it counts. He let you down. On the critical issue of America’s fiscal crisis, he represents no hope and no change. Just the same old Washington politics he once promised to end.”

    I’m not cruel enough to link you to the excitable old queen’s blog, though.

    1. Is there anyone left in Obama’s corner at all? I never thought HRC would be the one person to go down with the ship.

  26. British National Health Service ombudsman Ann Abraham has just released a scathing report about how the N.H.S. routinely ignores the basic needs of Britain’s elderly patients.

    People like the Donald Berwick who actually believe this is a system we should emulate here are either morons or psychos.

    1. Re: Mike M.

      British National Health Service ombudsman Ann Abraham has just released a scathing report about how the N.H.S. routinely ignores the basic needs of Britain’s elderly patients.

      NOW we know why Donald Berwick just loves the NHS!

  27. From the “rankling” link:

    The Progressive Change Campaign Committee, a liberal organization that boasts 700,000 members, took Obama to task before the budget was even officially released.

    “Proposing even more tax breaks for Wall Street banks while slashing and burning necessary government programs is right-wing radicalism, and no Democratic president should be part of it,” the group said in a statement.

    “Reality Based” Community indeed. These people live in a whole other universe.

  28. If the news reports that Mubarak has fallen into a coma are true, just let me say:

    PLEASE DO NOT BRING HIM TO THE UNITED STATES FOR MEDICAL TREATMENT. GIVE HIM MEDICAL CARE WHEREVER HE CURRENTLY IS.

    1. String his comatose ass up in Tahir square…red meat and such.

      GIVE HIM MEDICAL CARE WHEREVER HE CURRENTLY IS.

      Where he is now is a beautiful resort town that he pretty much owns, under very heavy security…all bought with your fucking money. Skin that thieving murderous fuck alive on youtube.

    2. PLEASE DO NOT BRING HIM TO THE UNITED STATES FOR MEDICAL TREATMENT. GIVE HIM MEDICAL CARE WHEREVER HE CURRENTLY IS.

      C’mon Fluffy, show some compassion for once in your life. Mubarak’s a a former head of state and a billionaire. He deserves the best. And, as we all know, the very best in health care is found in Cuba.

  29. Slow walkers…pfft, go around ’em.

    What about the fuckers that walk shoulder to shoulder (four wide) towards you and don’t move an inch. I’ll knock you down lady, don’t fuck with me. Now, get back to the office you pear shaped fucks.

  30. A very odd email exchange:

    From Ari ****** to Me:

    Mike did you send me the wrong plan or is there really a pool in your apartment.

    From Me to Ari ******:

    Oh, yes. I should have mentioned the pool. I had an exercise pool installed in the apartment because I was training for a swimming marathon. It is a really nice pool. It is 39 inches deep with powerful jets and a vinyl liner. The pool is great if you like to swim.

    Mike

    From Ari ****** to Me:

    Thats a pretty important thing to forget to mention, doncha think?! It takes up the whole f-ing apartment! How is there no bathroom?? Where am I supposed to shower and sleep?

    From Me to Ari ******:

    I know, it is a really nice pool. I usually use the kitchen as the bathroom. You can either pee in the sink, or out the window. The window overlooks an alley behind 5th St, and most of the time nobody walks below you. Even if you do piss on someone, you are on the 7th floor so they will probably have no idea where it came from. By the time it hits them, you will most likely be zipped up and have the window shut. The sink has a garbage disposal in case you need to take a dump.

    http://www.dontevenreply.com/

  31. Damn right we’re upset. Obama should be raising taxes on rich old white men, which is the only way to solve all our problems.

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