Friday (Hideous) Fun Link: 30 Most Absurd VHS Tape Covers
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There's a STEVE SMITH cameo on the Tanya's Island one.
Ya know, I've always said, Don't ever let 'em off easy with a simple live meat grinding - always give 'em a couple good body hacks on the way down.
And I have to admit, naked lilliputian chicks are kind of a turn-on, really.
They show just about as much of that chick's bottom as they can.
If you liked that, don't miss the exaggerated camel toe on the "Dr. Sadism" cover at the link. . .
Sort of looks like Patrick Swayze on the cover of White Fury. Alas, no.
Danny is a professional snowboarder who decides to take a little R&R before his next snowboarding competition with his girlfriend Christine, and friends Greg and Lesley to a remote cabin in the snow-covered mountains north of Boulder, Colorado. But their idle weekend is interrupted when two sadistic and murderous bank robbers, Tyler and Marcus, stumble into their cabin and hold the four couple hostage while they wait out a blizzard that hits. In the meantime, a bounty hunter named Martin Towers, relentlessly tracks down the ruthless robbers to find and either capture or kill them to claim the huge bounty on their heads.
I smell an Oscar. Back in 1990.
Buono is bueno!
Better than the covers was checking out the link to "Death Bed: the Bed That Eats People".
I wonder if the bed says, ironically, "Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!"?
I MUST see "Death Bed" now...MUST see it.
"That gives me an idea for my own movie.
Rape Stove: The Stove That Rapes People.
You'd do a lot better with bored housewives and the washing machine.
3,000 volts couldn't kill him... it just gave him the truly amazing idea to put a sniper scope on a jackhammer...
That's so he could zero in on those shovel-ready jobsites.
I'm disappointed there was no Don't Answer the Phone or Invasion of the Blood Farmers.
Not sure how to do the linky thing, but Motel Hell
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081184/
Love the Zombie vs Ninja teaser:
Didn't see Inbred Redneck Vampires (It made IMDB as Bloodsucking Redneck Vampires but they didn't post the art.) or Inbread Redneck Alien Abduction.
Then there's Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter, which, God help us, is a musical.
That one is actually pretty freaking hilarious. Look it up at tvtropes.org. You can currently stream it on Netflix.
No Sorority Babes at the Slimeball Bowl-A-Rama? No Fat Guy Goes Nutzoid?
Disappoint.
My friends and I loved Hawk: The Slayer of course we were D&D geeks...
And shit, man, no Gatorbait II?
My friends and I spent a substantial portion of our high school careers renting these movies. Our decisions were guided almost exclusively by how ludicrous the covers were. I vaguely recall The Mad Butcher being quite disappointing. In fact, I'd say a good 90% of this schlock failed to meet our expectations of blood, guts and boobies alluded to in the cover art. Mother's Day was one of the few very notable exceptions...
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081186/
Also, I believe that Wizard Video (see Mutant Hunt at the very bottom) placed that warning on absolutely every single one of its releases no matter what the actual content was. It should have read TOO SHITTY FOR THE SILVER SCREEN.
I recall seeing Invasion of the Bee Girls on broadcast TV one late night around 30 years ago or so. I don't think the folks at KPLR-TV in St. Louis were aware of the vast amounts of female nudity contained in the movie.
It did feature Anitra Ford of The Price is Right fame, sans clothing. Very stunning looking woman.
ew York Times columnist David Brooks at the American Enterprise Institute yesterday, the ostensible topic of debate was "How much government is good government?" But for a