Endangered species

NYC Kangaroo Dinners Now Legal, Delicious

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don't eat this one

I've long been an advocate for dining on kangaroo. Not just because Greenpeace endorses the 'roo as a low-emissions option—if anything, that made me slightly more wary. Nor is it because kangaroos are fast-reproducing, free-range pests in the native land and have to be culled anyway, making them the most guilt-free meat out there.

Nope, I've been a kangaroo booster for years because that stuff is downright delicious. Personally, I like my kangaroo cooked on the grill (or under a broiler for city-dwelling kangaroo connoisseurs) after some quality time in a fig marinade. I give my recipe at the bottom of this article.

Naturally, I was thrilled to learn that the New York legislature has repealed a misinformed law banning kangaroo meat on the grounds that the marvelous marsupials are endangered. (Only one species is in trouble. The commonly eaten varieties are as plentiful as they are savory.)

Esquire spoke with Andrew Jorda, co-owner of the SoHo restaurant Eight Mile Creek about the joys of kangaroo meat and his speedy victory over the kangaroo banners.

ESQ: So it's imported from Australia? Or do you have an "arrangement" with the Bronx Zoo?

AJ: It comes vacuum-sealed from Australia, and certainly doesn't taste frozen or freezer-burned. Kangaroo meat isn't from animals in captivity; it's completely organic, free range — not farms. They're culled every year by professional kangaroo shooters who shoot 'em in the head, which is very humane because the animals are dead before they hit the ground. They don't even know what's happening.

Read the whole thing. Lucky D.C. locals can pick up a cut of kangaroo at the butcher featured in this video by Reason.tv's Meredith Bragg.

NEXT: Reason.tv: Nanny of the Month for August 2010 - Police Chief Busts Guy Who Keeps Drunks Off the Street

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  1. They have hands Mangu Ward and they mate for life and carry their babies around in cute pouches. You might as well eat a little person.

    Actually they do taste good. And are basically like eating a deer.

    1. MIDGET! Not “little person”, MIDGET!

    2. You know what she is?

      Katherine Mangu-Ward is like the Cruella de Vil of kangaroos!

  2. I was going to say the same thing about their little quasi-humanesque hands. It’s like eating Kanga and Roo.

    1. My crush on Mangu Ward is over. She wants to eat the Winnie the Poo gang.

      1. Mine is only strengthened.

      2. Even Christopher Robin?

        1. If you will eat kanga, why not?

        2. ‘specially christopher robinnsss

        3. I hear he tastes a lot like Piglet.

          1. Long piglet – the other white meat.

      3. three words

        Bed room eyes

        She could eat human babies and my love would be unfazed.

  3. I hope they come out with a Hot Pockets version now.

  4. Thread jack — Zsa Zsa Gabor unresponsive . . . . .

        1. Indeed. I cannot stop laughing at this, just a perfect set-up.

          1. Glad to be of service

    1. That’s supposed to suck. Right? I don’t really care.

    2. She was an icon, but I’m more of an Eva guy, being a fan (as a kid, anyway) of Green Acres.

      1. Eva was awesome. Zsi was an annoying bimbo. But Eva was the goods.

      2. An icon of what? A weird Hungarian accent? Mostly famous for being famous though I remember her s movie from the 50s where she looked good. Couldn’t act though.

        1. A icon of iconishness.

        2. “Mostly famous for being famous”

          The original Paris Hilton. Hmmm, I wonder where Paris learned that skill?

          1. Paris isn’t famous for being famous. She is a porn star.

            1. Paris Hilton unresponsive…

              1. Yeah. The embarrassing thing about the sex tape she released was what a lousy lay she appeared to be. She might as well have been doing her nails in most of it.

                1. Does your hallway respond when you throw a pickle in it?

                  1. Hmmm, vagipickles!

                  2. The phrase is “throwing a hot dog down a hallway”, not a pickle.

                    My wife had not heard that phrase until about a month ago when I broke it out in reference to some bimbette.

                    1. Near Boston I always hear “hockey stick in a garbage can”. Same idea.

      3. And Eva was in her late 40s during the Green Acres days. She was Cougar before anyone knew what one was.

        1. I still hear Eva’s voice whenever Arianna Huffington opens her yap. Why is that? How can a Hungarian and Greek accent be so similar? Or is it just me? Why am I asking you?

          1. Yew know, Mister Douuuuglas, yer wife has a bodacious set of ta-tas…

          2. I hear Eva (and Zsa Zsa too, but Eva I actually liked). I like listening to Arianna speak, too.

  5. who shoot ’em in the head, which is very humane because the animals are dead before they hit the ground

    killing is not humane. there are only various crueler versions of taking away an animal’s entire future.

    i still eat them, just not in denial about what that entails.

    1. That’s just the guy making the normal excuses for douchebags who still eat meat but are too pussy to accept that if you want to be an omnivore, somebody has to kill something.

      Kangaroo meat is pretty good, but my most recent enjoyments (not that recent, actually) have been geoduck and alligator.

      1. At least the geoduck are local.

        1. Local is relative.

      2. How was the alligator served?

        1. It was breaded and fried. It was good. Had it at Bite of Seattle.

          1. Alligator in Seattle lacks freshness. For good ‘gator, you have to get it where it lives. Like New York.

            1. It was pretty juicy, dude. I was impressed. It was like tastier dark meat chicken.

              1. ‘Round these parts, we have The Meat Guy. Great way to get turducken, croc feet and half pigs delivered to your front door.

                The croc was surprisingly tender at a barbecue I had this summer. Ostrich is damn good and tastes a lot like prime beef. Also, you can scare children with the leftover croc claws.

            2. Just a byproduct of the gator hide industry. Like the “lucky” key chains they make across the street from the Pel Freez plant.

              1. Meat or pets?

                1. can’t they be both?

            3. Small, breaded cubes of alligator meat are delish. I’ve had it fresh. In FL where they don’t have to live in sewers.

              1. I had some crappy gator at Gatorland in Orlando. You think if any place would have good gator it’d be Gatorland.
                I ended up feeding it to the peacocks, which is kind of messed up when you think about nature’s plan and what.

                1. I think nature’s plan is that anything will eat anything, if it’s hungry enough.

            4. The best place to eat gator is in the Atchafalaya Basin. They shoot ’em out back in the Bayou. Great in an Etouffee:

              Ingredients
              2 sticks butter
              2 medium onions chopped
              2 cloves garlic chopped
              4 stalks celery chopped
              1 bell pepper chopped (optional)
              1 can tomatoes or Rotel Brand tomato
              salt black pepper and cayenne
              1 pound alligator meat cut in thin strips
              1/2 cup green onions
              1/4 cup parsley

              Directions
              Saute’ onions, garlic and celery (bell pepper optional) in the butter until soft. Add the tomatoes and simmer for twenty minutes in a covered iron pot.

              Add the alligator meat and cook over a low fire until tender about one hour. If the gravy thickens too much while cooking or at the end add water. Add the onion tops and parsley in the last 10 minutes of cooking.

              Serve over rice but especially nice with jasmine scented rice, a fresh tomato and lettuce salad and a thick slice of French bread for mopping your plate clean.

              1. I’ve never had it this way but I’ll have to try it out next time I’m back home.

                1. Where is back home?

                  1. Lafayette. Not too far from the Atchafalaya.

                    1. I enjoy that area, stayed in Breaux Bridge several times and Lake Fausse Point once. Wouldn’t mind moving down there at some point. Warmer than Minnesota and there are some pretty cool old houses.

        2. IT’S A COOKBOOK!

      3. Alligator has to be marinated or beaten thoroughly, as it tends to be pretty tough.

        Ostrich is pretty good, and buffalo is decent.

        1. I don’t think beating the old alligator means what you think it does…

        2. I had the Buffalo ribeye at Ted’s in Atlanta last week. Best steak you’ll ever have. (don’t bother with the buffalo filet, not nearly as good). Ordered it medium rare and it came out like a piece of seared ahi tuna. It was absolutely fantastic. I raved about it so much that the whole team at work wanted to go a couple of nights later. 12 people ordered the ribeye at our table and nobody said a word for 15 minutes as they dissected the last morsels out of the end-fat. Yep, it is that good.

      4. I’ve never eaten ‘roo.

        Does it go well with Spotted Owl as an appetizer?

        1. Yes, but baby seal works better.

        2. With a nice Komodo dragon gravy.

        3. I like it with a side of Whooping Crane, or, if in season, Bald Eagle.

          1. Every time I’ve had Bald Eagle it’s been stringy.

          2. Easy, dude, you’re giving me a woody.

      5. but are too pussy to accept that if you want to be an omnivore, somebody has to kill something.

        you can be an omnivore and not kill shit.

        Ever heard of the word “Carrion”?

        1. Eating meat is not murder. It is recycling.

    2. Yeah, it would be better if they starved to death.

  6. Zsa Zsa Gabor unresponsive . . . . .

    Send in the boxing kangaroo.

    1. H&R has thoroughly corrupted me. I saw the headline on Google News, and my first thought was “I have to post his on H&R before anyone else does”.

  7. Better not drink beer with it. That’d be too many hops.

    1. da da bump

      1. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen! Don’t forget to tip your waitress!

        And now, the comedic stylings of Shecky Greene…

  8. I’m not saying it should be illegal to eat Bambi’s mom, but…

    You are eating Bambi’s mom.

    1. Bambi’s mom was a kangaroo?

      That’s some fucked up animal husbandry, right there.

      1. You know what I mean.

        Just because Bambi’s mom is delicious…

        Doesn’t mean it isn’t Bambi’s mom.

      2. I was debating making a comment about the deer-kangaroo business, then decided that Ken was well aware that Bambi was a deer.

        1. Disney sucks.

          1. This can’t be overstated.

            1. I always thought they sucked for killing the parent(s) off in the first act.

              Why they gotta jerk little kids around like that? Little did I realize the alternative was the princess parade.

              1. Disney cartoons regularly include very disturbing themes and kill off parents with the zeal that George Lucas removes limbs. In his films, I mean.

                1. Or like Michael Eisner does in real life.

              2. Bambi is an awesome movie, and Bambi’s father isn’t dead, he just has other Does to fuck ’cause he’s the king of the forest and what.

                1. is the plural of Doe, doe?

          2. Disney was a sadistic fucker who loved noting more than killing off cute animals to make small children cry.

        2. I don’t care if it’s a kangaroo, sea otter, seal or white tailed jackalope…

          If it has cute furry babies that don’t go *cluck*, *baa*, *oink* or *moo*, it might as well be Bambi’s mom.

    2. I used to know a babe named Bambi. And her mom was quite the MILF.

      Your accusation was my dream, actually.

    3. You can’t eat Bambi’s mom, because Bambi’s mom was made of acetate and ink.

  9. Can you eat the pouches?

    1. Of course. What else are you supposed to put the ground-up lungs and heart in? I mean, you have to wash them out pretty good. A baby kangaroo shit in it for a few months, after all.

      1. Sounds kinda like an Australian version of haggis…

    2. I’m guessing that’s made into sausage, hot dogs, jerky or head cheese.

      Not that I’d know–I’m no expert on the tasty bits of Bambi’s mom.

    3. Stuff the pouch with barley & meat and call it haggis… but you’d never catch me eating that nasty shite.

      1. Lots of displaced Scots in Australia, so the threat of a kangaroo haggis is very real.

    4. I hear the rooterus is quite delish.

  10. “Springfield Man Loses Pants, Life.”

    The title reminded me of the above title where Homer fakes his death to get out of picking up litter for work.

  11. As far as the alt-text is concerned, couldn’t we see what she looks like out of the costume before making that decision?

    1. Mangu Ward is supposed to be the innocent one. She would never think of her alt text like that.

    2. What makes you think it’s a girl?

      I thought all furries were gay males.

      1. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

      2. Really?

        And here I just thought they were atheists!

        1. “Really?

          And here I just thought they were atheists!

          Do you guys have any idea how fucking funny I am?

      3. I thought furries were asexual. Isn’t that the point of the suit? All you need is a slit for an orifice and it doesn’t really matter what sex it is right?

        1. I always thought that furries were gay men filled with so much self-loathing that they needed to assume a false cartoon character identity [along with their partner] in order to feel comfortable sexually. Sort of like only doing it with the lights out – to the hundredth power.

          But maybe I don’t completely understand the phenomenon.

          1. I only know about Furries from hearing about a CSI episode. But I thought there were girl furries to. But maybe not. And the self loathing gay man theory makes too much sense for it not to at least be partially true.

            1. Jennifer did a sort of undercover/infiltrator Furry story for one of her papers once, or I wouldn’t have known much about them either.

              Again, I know this isn’t true for each and every one of ’em, but for a lot of them, I think that’s another case of it being a lot easier to tell their parents they’re a furry than to tell them the truth.

              1. I would much rather my kid tell me he or she is gay than tell me they are a furry. I can’t believe I am alone in thinking that.

                1. Well aren’t you open-minded!

                  ; )

          2. From Wikipedia

            Differing approaches to sexuality have been a source of controversy and conflict in furry fandom. Examples of sexual aspects within furry fandom include erotic art and furry-themed cybersex. The term “yiff” is most commonly used to indicate sexual activity or sexual material within the fandom?this applies to sexual activity and interaction within the subculture whether online (in the form of cybersex) or offline.

            According to a study, 19-25% of the fandom members report homosexuality, 37-48% bisexuality, 30-51% heterosexual, and 3-8% other forms of alternative sexual relationships. In 2002 about 2% stated an interest in zoophilia, and less than 1% an interest in plushophilia.

            1. Early portrayal of the furries in articles such as Loaded, Vanity Fair, and the syndicated sex column “Savage Love” focused mainly on the sexual aspect of furry fandom. Fictional portrayals of furry fandom have appeared on television shows such as ER, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, The Drew Carey Show, Sex2K on MTV, Entourage, 1000 Ways to Die, and 30 Rock. Most furry fans claim that these media portrayals are misconceptions, while the recent coverage focuses on debunking myths and stereotypes that have come to be associated with the furry fandom. A reporter attending Anthrocon 2006 noted that “despite their wild image from Vanity Fair, MTV and CSI, furry conventions aren’t about kinky sex between weirdos gussied up in foxy costumes”, that conference attendees were “not having sex more than the rest of us”, and that the furry convention was about “people talking and drawing animals and comic-book characters in sketchbooks.”

              = = = =

              4 minutes a day like the rest of us unfortunate bastards.

          3. “I always thought that furries were gay men filled with so much self-loathing that they needed to assume a false cartoon character identity [along with their partner] in order to feel comfortable sexually. Sort of like only doing it with the lights out – to the hundredth power.”

            The projection is strong in this one.

          4. Former H&R commenter “Jennifer” wrote a newspaper article on a convention of furries. It was pretty funny – she went there expecting lurid goings-on, and found none.

            1. “she went there expecting lurid goings-on”

              The only reason she goes anywhere really.

              I keed, I keed!

          5. Maybe they just watched too many cartoons with anthropomorphic animals during their sexually formative years and it fucked them up good. Shit, if Jessica Rabbit actually had bunny ears, I’d probably be a furry too.

        2. Wouldn’t that be bisexual? Asexual is “without sex”. Only a bi would be indifferent.

          And Fluffy, you’re confusing furries with “the guys at Disney who wear the Tigger costume”. The second is a small subset of the first.

          1. Transsexual I guess.

  12. That’s what these damn kangaroos get for disguising themselves as giant mouses and getting into boxing fights with cats and such.

    If you do that shit you should expect to get eaten.

    1. That’s where I got all of knowledge of kangaroos.

      1. All knowledge. Not just my knowledge.

    2. Oh Father! The shame of it all…

  13. I order gator cubes and you’re giving me croc feet?

    Do you know who I am? I’ll have you arrested you young punk!

  14. I wonder if this law also banned kangaroo leather baseball gloves?

  15. So are there any laws against importing live kangaroos and then letting them run free to create our own home grown stock of meat?

  16. This thread has given me lots of interesting ideas!

    1. Just a word of warning… I don’t think the Aussies brand the roos that kick.

    2. Hope so. We could use the rest.

  17. Suckers.

    -The Koalas

    1. Don’t give KMW any ideas.

  18. And the PETArds offically lose their shit in 3….2…..

    1. I say chaps, it seems I’ve misplaced my feces. Can someone help me find them?

  19. I’d go down there and pay the Aussies for a chance to shoot the little pests but they are so gay about firearms.

    1. Actually, yes, they have extremely restrictive firearms laws, but there’s still a strong shooters and hunters community. Wild hog hunting has a following there as well a ‘roo.

      As long as you have a clean record, you would have no trouble getting a non-resident gun permit issued practically on the spot.

      In rural areas you’ll get no hassel at all.

  20. Can’t get it at the site listed. I emailed him a few months ago and he couldn’t get it anymore. He heard Russians were buying it all. Seriously

  21. The Rooskies are coming! The Rooskies are coming!

  22. Kangaroo hides also make great leather which is a lot tougher and more durable than cowhide.

    1. Maybe you and Cruella Mangu-Ward should go bowling…

      What you need is something that’s softer than puppy but tastes better than kangaroo! A delicious mink, if you will.

      …with skin tougher than leather.

      1. Oh, you mean kitten.

  23. Kangaroo meat was illegal? When I lived I in NYC we used to eat it now and then at this place in Brooklyn. Who knew we were breaking the law!

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  26. : It comes vacuum-sealed from Australia, and certainly doesn’t taste frozen or freezer-burned. Kangaroo meat isn’t from animals in captivity; it’s completely organic, free range ? not farms. http://www.vendreshox.com/nike-shox-oz-c-6.html They’re culled every year by professional kangaroo shooters who shoot ’em in the head, which is very humane because the animals are dead before they hit the ground. They don’t even know what’s happening.

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