A'Jad: Breakin' Teeth, Hatin' on Cowboys

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President Obama "is under the pressure of capitalists and the Zionists," says Iran's lilliputian dictator Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and is a "cowboy" like former President George W. Bush. Ahmadinejad was responding to an Obama administration pledge to reduce the scenarios in which nuclear weapons are "on the table," excepting the case of Iran and North Korea. Unless the administration shuts up and alters its policy, he blustered, Iran will commence with its "tooth-breaking" response:

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad derided Obama on Wednesday, depicting him as an ineffective leader influenced by Israel to target Iran more aggressively.

"American materialist politicians, whenever they are beaten by logic, immediately resort to their weapons like cowboys," Ahmadinejad said in a speech before a crowd of several thousand in northwestern Iran.

"Mr. Obama, you are a newcomer (to politics). Wait until your sweat dries and get some experience. Be careful not to read just any paper put in front of you or repeat any statement recommended," Ahmadinejad said in the speech, aired live on state TV.

Ahmadinejad said Obama "is under the pressure of capitalists and the Zionists" and vowed Iran would not be pushed around. "(American officials) bigger than you, more bullying than you, couldn't do a damn thing, let alone you," he said, addressing Obama.

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  1. “(American officials) bigger than you, more bullying than you, couldn’t do a damn thing, let alone you,” he said, addressing Obama.

    The worst thing about this is – it’s true.

  2. Since when is Ahmedinejad considered a dictator?

    1. Since when is he not?

      1. 1 – He doesn’t have authority over the military.
        2 – Unless the Iranian constitution is changed he will not be able to run for president in 2013.

        Yeah, he says crazy shit. But he doesn’t have all that much power or authority within or outside of Iran. So, again, how is he a dictator? Has the definition of the word really gotten to this point?

        1. Pretty much. The guy’s an insane midget clown, but that’s about it.

        2. Ahmedinejad maybe not the top leader of Iran. But he is the Iranian goernment’s spokesperson & has a seat at the oligarchical table. He would not be able to say what he does if he didn’t have the backing of the Revolutionary Guard.

    2. He is the designated front man for an authoritarian and dictatorial hierarchy. Plenty close enough for government work.

      1. Don’t you think that a dictator needs some actual power to dictate? As far as I can gather, the president is really not in charge in Iran.

    3. I’ll arrest anyone who says he is.

      1. And put something cancerous in their rectum, right? Like your penis.

    4. That is a good question. He really isn’t. That is the job of the supreme Islamic council, or whoever it is in charge in Iran. Ahmedinejad just gives silly speeches.

  3. I’m going to have to move “Obama” into the “neocon” section of my bookmarks.

  4. I’m going to enjoy seeing Ahmonnajihad swinging from a gallows one day.

  5. I haven’t finalized my views on Iran, but it is possible that here the neocons are right, like the proverbial stopped clock (or, more pertinently, like the boy who cried wolf and finally encountered a *real* wolf).

    Under its present regime, Iran has engaged in acts of war against the USA several times, starting with the hostage takeover in 1979, going through the proxy terror wars, and the death threat against US-protected persons (Salman Rushdie’s publisher). A case could be made for declaring war right back at the Iranians, before they get the capacity to back up their warmaking with nukes.

    However, I haven’t really made up my mind. It’s hard to make a firm decision in an area where people are promoting what they *wish* to be true – ‘Iran can’t be a threat, that would strengthen the military-industrial complex;’ or ‘Iran must be a threat, it gives us a chance to show National Greatness and help out allies!’

    1. Actually, Iran is currently and continuously engaged in acts of war against the US right now, through its proxies in Afghanistan and Iraq.

      1. I didn’t know that anyone around here understood that.

    2. Please refrain from using the word “regime.”

      After all, none of us called the Shah’s government a “regime.”

    3. “Iran has engaged in acts of war against the USA several times, starting with the hostage takeover in 1979,”

      Yeah, countries tend to do that when you try to overthrow their governments…

      Actually, you have to go back a little further in Iranian history. The US started it when the US helped the UK install the dictatorial Pahlavi dynasty over a democratically elected leader in Iran for our oil interests. The Islamic Revolution of ’79 was a reaction to our meddling in their politics. Beyond that, its been tit-for-tat ever since, sanctions & freezing of assets for hostages, medical aid and comfort for the Shah, etc.

      The best thing the US could now do would be to normalize relations with Iran and re-open trade. The more western ideas that enter Iran through trade, the faster the population will turn completely away from the mullahs. Hard line religion simply can’t compete with western ideas like MTV, Twitter, internet porn and gambling, and freedom to criticize your government. Who would you rather watch and listen to; Lady Gaga or the Grand Ayatollah?

      Better relations with Iran would go far in solving our issues in the middle east – its their proxies in Iraq, Pakistan and Afghanistan that are causing so much trouble for us. Moreover, while the US is wasting billions of dollars every month making enemies through stupid wars there, China is quietly buying assets and securing oil contracts.

  6. I would actually respect Obama if his response was simply “blow me bitch”.

    Damn those so-called “rules” of diplomacy that frown on such behavior.

    1. Or pointed to his crotchal area and said “Yo, Ahmadinejad, I got your nukes hangin low.”

    1. Lou Meengo is my favorite bot ever.

  7. “Mr. Obama, you are a newcomer (to politics). Wait until your sweat dries and get some experience.”

    I like the cut of his jihad.

    1. + 1-1/2

  8. “American materialist politicians, whenever they are beaten by logic, immediately resort to their weapons like cowboys,”

    I wondered where Chad was.

    1. Furiously typing into the teleprompter, sounds like.

  9. “American materialist politicians, whenever they are beaten by logic, immediately resort to their weapons like cowboys,” Ahmadinejad said in a speech before a crowd of several thousand in northwestern Iran.

    I recently watched a documentary on Iran where Ahmadinejad was speaking in front of a crowd, and people in the crowd were yelling back “30 years of revolution, and still the roads are not paved!”.

    Just sayin’

    1. Good revolutions never come to an end — they just keep right on revolutin’.

  10. start the war with Iran….pass carbon tax and the VAT….the country needs to collapse sooner rather than later. I hope I’m not 50 yet when the rebuildinng starts

    1. You’re very optimistic if you think rebuilding is going to commence that quickly.

  11. Yeehaw! And you just THOUGHT Blazing Saddles was a comedy.

  12. Pardon me while I whip this out…

  13. Ya know what? Fuck him! I’m gonna get Deepok Chapra really loaded and have him meditate the whole country into rubble.

  14. [sic]…drunk fingers.

  15. Well, he’s got one thing right – Obama IS an ineffective leader. By far the most ineffective president in US history. Millard Filmore accomplished more.

    1. Obama sucks, but after the health care thing can we really say he is ineffective? With the passage of the health insurance scam, I think we have to move Obama from the “Trying to do stupid shit and failing at it,” to the “Trying to do stupid shit and getting some of it done.” Unless you are giving Pelosi and Reid all the credit for the bill’s passage, and/or think that the GOP or the Supreme Court is somehow going to reverse the whole thing.

  16. The man speaks the truth.

  17. Fuck that two inch tyrant and the napoleon complex he rode in on. I may not agree with Obama on mostly everything but he’s our president, and I’ll take America over I-fucking-ran any day. Same thing for the smug eurotrash during the Bush administration, if you think America is so provincial and aggressive maybe you can defend yourself from now on, pissants.

    Not that I would like to see a war with Iran, but if their leaders started getting taken out head exploding, Barrett .50 style I would not shed a tear.

  18. When I read things like this, I want my army to kill lots of people in faraway countries where people think they can kill me for stupid shit my president says. Is that wrong?

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