Born to Run the Rebuilding of Third World Countries


Trust me. I dress like a gypsy

Wait, did Bruce Springsteen's guitar player take to the pages of Politico (!) and urge readers not to help rebuild Haiti, but instead help "reimagine" it? Did the former Sopranos actor and host of Little Steven's Underground Garage suggest, in the pages of Politico (!), that Sean Combs, Angelina Jolie, and The Beatles (does he mean Ringo and Paul?) band together and "make [Haiti] the high-tech capital of the world?" Just what kind of disaster capitalism are these rock stars demanding? 

The Haitian people need a partnership with a group of individuals that will help them, for the first time in their existence, establish a state-of-the-art infrastructure that will last 100 years, unencumbered by political and economic corruption. Then let the ingenuity, work ethic and spirit of the people do the rest.

So it's time to call on Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Larry Ellison, Sergey Brin, Larry Page, Michael Dell, Jeff Bezos, Oprah Winfrey, Steve Jobs, Paul Allen, George Clooney, Robert Johnson, Angelina Jolie, Jay-Z, Brad Pitt, Wyclef Jean…

You get the idea. 

Next week, according to sources at Politico HQ in Arlington: Ernest "Boom" Carter on the Iranian nuclear threat.

Speaking of "disaster capitalism," Naomi Klein has discovered "a document" that outlines a sinister free market plan for remaking the Haitian economy, which was so awesome and egalitarian (i.e. everyone was equally poor) before the earthquake. The "document," this Protocols of the Elders of Port-au-Prince, turns out to be a brief, vacuous blog post on the Heritage Foundation website.