Ebony Mag, Circa 1985, Predicted What Michael Jackson Would Look Like in The Year 2000. They Were Wrong.


Nobody gets the future right! Where's my jet pack? Why did super-science fail us?

And here's what Ebony mag, in 1985, thought Michael Jackson would look like in the year 2000:

I remain convinced that the best commentary on Jackson's odd and ultimately enormously disturbing life comes from RU Sirius, jefe at the indispensable H+, who eulogized the performer as "a signpost on the road to post-humanity… the future will study him from that perspective, and in some odd way, it will learn from his many mistakes." 

NEXT: Freedom Blasters

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  1. Sorry, Ebony. Try Albino Diana Ross instead of Billy Dee Williams.

  2. Landau, is that you?

  3. Xeones,

    Go to the Ebony 1985 link. It’s assume. They grayed Emmanuel Lewis and stuck a mustache on him. Bam! This is what he should look like in 2000. It’s awesome.

  4. Not sure how “It’s assume” crept into that post. Damn gremlins.

  5. Wow, so this was life before photoshop. I’d almost forgotten.

  6. The man horse is dead. Please do not Beat It.

  7. I was watching this TV guide show and this dude was talking about how MJ’s nose was removed at the time of death. Is that true? So South Park was right?

  8. So Tycho Brahe and Michael Jackson did have something in common.

  9. This sorta look like MJ is missing the tip of his schnoz.

  10. “In number, his fans will have grown tenfold by the year 2000”.

    There weren’t enough people on the planet for his fans to grow tenfold from 1985. Unless you count the dead, but that doesn’t work as well outside of Chicago.

  11. Xeones

    Billie Dee Williams was the first person I thought of when I saw the “pic”

    Art-P.O.G. wins the “Most Obscure Reference of the Week” award. Here are your winnings. Don’t blow it.

  12. Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.

  13. “At age 40, he will have aged gracefully and have a handsome, more mature look.”


  14. I wonder how they thought Oprah would look. Fat?

  15. Growing up in the 90’s, I’d sort of assumed Jackson always looked like a monster. I was shocked to discover that in 1985, he was actually a very handsome man, who for whatever reason decided to butcher himself.

    That picture is probably pretty close to what Jackson would look like were he not bugfuck crazy.

    Man, that guy.

  16. Even the tie was way off.

  17. I guess they assumed that hair and clothing styles were going to remain 1985-forever. Sadly, it was not to be.

  18. Rhywun | July 24, 2009, 3:59pm | #

    I guess they assumed that hair and clothing styles were going to remain 1985-forever. Sadly By the Infinite Grace of the FSM, it was not to be.


    (All praise to the FSM)

  19. Apart from the hair, the mustache and the outfit, I would’ve been much happier with that look compared to where the poor guy ended up.

    And yeah, what’s with this idea that hair and clothing and mustache were going to remain 1985 forever???

    Sloppy journalism. 🙂

  20. He’s not dressed all that different from Kanye West….just sayin

  21. Maybe this picture drove him towards the plastic surgery…

  22. you guys seriously need to stop bashing on MJ. so what. who cares. it was his decisions and not yours, and i know for a fact that he didn’t do it for your judgments. so stop judging and hating, let him be. okay, so ebony mag was wrong, but this was the 80’s..nothing was really ever right with those kinds of things. so calm down and if you don’t have anything nice to say, than don’t say it at all. cause your negative comments doesn’t make you any better.

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