Politics

Two Reasons to Vote Against Obama

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Obama, who has received a significant amount of celebrity endorsements, will be the beneficiary of a fundraiser at which rock legends Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel will perform together.

More here.

All right. Who should do benefit concerts for:

John McCain?

Chuck Baldwin?

Ralph Nader?

Bob Barr?

NEXT: Uncle Satchmo?

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  1. Two good reasons not to vote for Obama?

    More like two good reasons not to attend this fundraiser.

  2. McCain? I’d say Cream for that Vietnam feeling and Ted Nugent.

    Chuck Baldwin? Someone religious.

    Ralph Nader? Joan Baez and Paul Simon.

    Barr gets Rush, of course.

  3. Ralph Nader? Joan Baez and Paul Simon.

    I can call you Betty if you call me…

    OH NOES!

  4. Only two?

  5. John McCain? Charlie Daniels Band

    Chuck Baldwin? Who?

    Ralph Nader? Indigo Girls

    Bob Barr? a drunk beating on a bent shitcan

  6. PL posted my answers before I could type them out 🙁

    You snooze you lose.

  7. McCain: The U.S. Marine Corps Wind Ensemble with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

    Chuck Baldwin: The Summit (NJ) High School Stage Band — or some other group you never heard of.

    Ralph Nader: Pete Seeger, Arlo Guthrie and other folkies.

    Bob Barr: Rage Against the Machine.

  8. Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel will perform together.

    I do believe, in the King James bible, this is a bonafide portent of the coming apocalypse.

  9. Nader’s history with the Edsel should give him that one-hit wonder from the 60’s about the Nash Rambler whose horn went beep beep beep.

    Since Barr has now found religion on medical marijuana, he can use Afroman.

    McCain… Zombie John Philip Sousa and the Marine Corps Band for the national service warmonger.

  10. Andrew, I think McKinney should get RATM. Chuck Baldwin should get Lee Greenwood.

  11. John McCain – GBH
    Chuck Baldwin – TSOL
    Ralph Nader – No Means No
    Bob Barr – Negative Approach

  12. McCain: Country Joe and the Fish
    Baldwin: Black Sabbath
    Nader: Skrewdriver
    Barr: Gang of Four

  13. Nader should get GWAR.

    McCain should get the rolling stones (it needs to be someone older than him).

    Barr should get Ted Nugent.

    Baldwin should get Gaye Bikers on Acid.

  14. BakedPenguin, you are probably right. Barr is too hard-core for RATM. As for Chuck, Lee Greenwood is a good choice.

  15. McCain … The Rolling Stones. Standing next to Keith Richards would make McCain look young and sane.

  16. John McCain?
    Jewel

    Chuck Baldwin?
    Stryper

    Ralph Nader?
    The Cars

    Bob Barr?
    ZZ Top

  17. McCain should have Hanzel Und Gretyl doing “Fukken Uber Death Party”.

  18. All right. Who should do benefit concerts for:

    John McCain?
    Crothchety old man, Jerry Lee Lewis.

    Chuck Baldwin?
    Prussion Blue.

    Ralph Nader?
    Peter Paul and Mary.

    Bob Barr?
    Tina Turner. I don’t know what her politics are, I just love her.

  19. … Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel will perform together.

    Why not throw in Barbara Streisand? The Unholy Trinity of screeching, overrated, middle-aged hacks will awaken Cthulhu and end it all. And oblivion is looking pretty good right now.

  20. I saw Billy Joel and Elton John in concert. But they weren’t campaigning for anyone.

  21. I was going to defend Springsteen and Joel but I checked my iPhone and strangely, I find I don’t have a single cut from either.
    So apparently they DO suck.

  22. Wow! Billy Joel is looking as bad and old as McSame.

  23. mccain: old and in the way

    baldwin: the minutemen

    nader: crash test dummies

    barr: cosmo kid

  24. ralph nader: radiohead

    bob barr: one of the marley brothers

    chuck baldwin: his church’s choir

  25. All right. Who should do benefit concerts for:

    John McCain?

    Pat Boone and Lawrence Welk.

  26. joe,

    Welk is dead. As for Pat Boone, do you mean Heavy Metal Pat Boone? Or that other one?

  27. You almost got me with Billy Joel. Yikes!

  28. John McCain: The Andrews Sisters (so what if they’re dead? It never stopped Keith Richards…)

    Chuck Baldwin: Pat Boone (in his metal phase, with apologies to joe)

    Ralph Nader: Spinal Tap circa “(Listen to the) Flower People”

    Bob Barr: Robbie Fulks (with bonus points if he can get Rhymefest to join him on stage like during this year’s Hideout Block Party).

  29. McCain: Ol’ Dirty Bastard
    Baldwin: Missing Persons
    Nader: Death Cab for Cutie
    Barr: X and/or Cypress Hill

  30. Oh, and Episiarch:

    McCain should have Hanzel Und Gretyl doing “Fukken Uber Death Party”.

    Only if they play their song “Starf*cker” for Cindy…

  31. McCain: ABBA

    Chuck Baldwin: Question Mark and the Mysterions

    Ralph Nader: Sammy Hagar

    And Obama doesn’t need Billy or Bruce, he has a chorus of elementary schoolers!

  32. I saw Billy Joel and Elton John in concert. But they weren’t campaigning for anyone.

    Yes they were, they were campaigning for mediocrity.

  33. “They were campaigning for mediocrity.”

    They did a good job.

  34. Since Obama broke his promise to abide by campaign spending limits he can have big $$$ concerts, McCain cannot. So the question is moot ;(

  35. McCain – any generic, teased-blonde-hair country gal-singer. [`cept Cindy might veto that, as she knows Mac has a thang for that type.]

    Obama – Living Color and The Bus Boys!

    Baldwin – Sandy Patty

    Bob Barr – Mojo Nixon and the Kinkster!

    Kevin

  36. Only if they play their song “Starf*cker” for Cindy…

    Finally, someone else who listens to them. They could do “Number 1 In Deutschland” for Obama, “Mutant Starseed Creation” for Palin, “Transplutonian Annihilation” for Biden, “Kaiser Von Shizer” for Baldwin, and “Pleiadian Agenda” for Barr.

  37. “Barr – Mojo Nixon and the Kinksters.”

    Mojo would totally do it.

  38. rock legends Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel

    Rock is a subset of pop. Billy Joel is no more a “rock legend” than are the Bee Gees.
    Not that it matters.

  39. Steven W., that is one raggedy-ass web site you have there.

  40. ed | October 1, 2008, 1:36pm | #
    rock legends Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel

    Rock is a subset of pop. Billy Joel is no more a “rock legend” than are the Bee Gees.
    Not that it matters.

    I agree. Billy Joel’s induction in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, along with the induction of James Taylor, and the exclusion of The Stooges and MC5, are among the many reasons why I would like to see the RNRHOF destroyed.

  41. McCain: Too bad Johnny Ramone isn’t still with us. Ricky Skaggs, Gary Sinise and The Lt. Dan Band

    Nader: The Dixie Twits, Holly Near

    Bob Barr: The Kinks, Ted Nugent

  42. John McCain?
    The Eagles

    Chuck Baldwin?
    DC Talk

    Ralph Nader?
    Green Day

    Bob Barr?
    Psychadelic Furs

  43. Peter Paul and Mary.

    J sub, I kid you not, I thought the exact same thing!

    Baldwin should get Justice. He’d at least approve of their album title.

  44. John McCain?
    Kid Rock if he wants it loud
    The last surviving Andrews Sister if he wants it mellow

    Ralph Nader?
    Tom Morello (The Nightwatchman)

    Bob Barr?
    Rush

  45. McCain: Billy Joel, preferably driving McCain to the event.

    Balwin: Anti Nowhere League

    Nader: NAS/Diddy “Hate Me Now”

    Barr: GnR, scheduled to perform and then cancels at the last minute.

  46. Balwin: Anti Nowhere League The John Birch Society Barbershop Quartet

  47. A related question: Which candidate is the most metal?

  48. Baldwin – 10,000 Maniacs (one of Lonewacko’s favorites, coincidence?)

  49. Baldwin should get Justice. He’d at least approve of their album title.

    The German Justice or the French Justice?

    Who is the most soporific? They could have Troum.

  50. In related news, has the Techno Viking endorsed a candidate yet?

  51. I have to second jimmy on the Crash Test Dummies for Nader.

    Bravo, jimmy!

  52. Barack Obama yesterday:

    “I don’t think me calling House Republican members would have been that helpful. I tend not to be that persuasive on that side of the aisle”
    Barack Obama today in Wisconsin:

    “I’ve been reaching out to leaders in both parties to do whatever I can to help pass this plan.”

  53. Sausage Swingin’ Libber,

    WOW. I had the exact same thought for Baldwin. Damn, man. I was briefly considering Officer Negative (“Kick Satan in the face/with our steel toe boots”), but they’re too, um, noisy.

    McCain: Merle Haggard

    Nader: Flux of Pink Indians

    Barr: Hank III

  54. Rick
    Bob Barr: The Kinks, Ted Nugent
    The Nuge is a GOPer. But the Kinks is a damn good libertarian choice.

  55. Balwin: Anti Nowhere League The John Birch Society Barbershop Quartet

    You owe me a new keyboard, PC.

  56. The ultimate video for any major party political party has to be Dr. Mabuse, by Propaganda.

  57. The German Justice or the French Justice?

    French, obv. Fun French techno beats scary German metal any day. Sorry to break it to you.

    They could have Troum.

    See what I mean? Throw in Schoenberg and his freakin’ Austrian 12-tone misadventures, it’s enough to condemn the entire region.

  58. Dagny,

    The Techno Viking mocks Gallic and Teutonic pretensions. There is only the Dane and his music.

  59. I just done did the guitaring on a jazz cover of Billy Joel’s Just the Way You Are for my buddy’s wedding. It was a real aspirational middle-class kind of classy. And it made me want to vote Obama, so undoubtedly this fundraiser will be successful.

  60. See what I mean? Throw in Schoenberg and his freakin’ Austrian 12-tone misadventures, it’s enough to condemn the entire region.

    Yes, the Germans are not what they once were. Which is good for the world. But what about KMFDM?

    These guys are pretty good, in a straight-up rock sort of way.

  61. Barr – Rush and DEVO

  62. The Techno Viking mocks Gallic and Teutonic pretensions.

    The Techno Viking is you, isn’t it, ProL? No need to be ashamed. Those dance moves were superhot, and the jiggling of your pecs was trance-inducing.

    (That video caused me to laugh to lunch-choking extremes. Is it possible that the Techno Viking causes seizures?)

  63. Someone needs to do a concert for Charles Jay.

  64. What’s funny is that the Techno Viking is all over the Internet, but no one has claimed to be him or to know him. He’s too powerful for the web.

  65. Barr – Rush and DEVO

    Devo play for no man, for they are not men. Remember: nobody knows, so let’s find out.

  66. Good point.

    Recordings of DEVO, then.

  67. Top lyrics overheard at the fundraisers for:

    Nader:
    “Everything causes cancer”

    Barr:
    “I don’t care what you say anymore, this is my life.”

    McCain:
    “I’m free, free fallin’.”

    Baldwin:
    “… that saved a wretch like me.”

  68. Indeed, for Baldwin it has to be DCTalk . . .
    “what will people think when they hear that I’m a Jesus Freak?”

  69. Here’s a Third Reason | October 1, 2008, 2:44pm | #

    Barack Obama yesterday:

    “I don’t think me calling House Republican members would have been that helpful. I tend not to be that persuasive on that side of the aisle”
    Barack Obama today in Wisconsin:

    “I’ve been reaching out to leaders in both parties to do whatever I can to help pass this plan.”

    I agree: knowing the difference between the Congressional leadership and the back benchers is crucial for a presidential candidate. If Jeanne Schmidt rises up into your airspace, you have to know right away if you can zap her.

  70. Jamie Kelly-

    Congratulations! See, you can post without using expletives. I’m sorry, Jamie, forgive me for being presumptuous-expletives are naughty words.

  71. That sounds like a challenge, Jamie.

  72. McCain – Alice in Chains

    Baldwin – The Pretenders

    Nader – Asleep At The Wheel or Motorhead

    Barr – The Cure

    And a special VP bonus….

    Biden – Grin

    Palin – Bonzo Dog Band

  73. Palin’s totally the Nuge. In fact, I think we should breed them to create the perfect hunter.

  74. Pro Lib . . .
    Terah Nulin.

  75. Congratulations! See, you can post without using expletives.

    What the fuck are you talking about, you shit-smelling ball sac?

  76. Zed Impalin.

  77. you win.

  78. They should all get some sort of German Oom-pah band wearing leather shorts.

  79. think about THIS !
    President Palin
    VICE-PRESIDENT PELOSI !!!!!!!!!!!

    two EXCELLENT reasons to vote AGAINST McCain

  80. J Sub D,
    Yeah, I thought the Kinks was a great choice for Barr As far as the Nuge, you’re right. He’s a GOP boy. He was my nod to the 2nd Amendment.

  81. Obama – Propagandhi

  82. I see the clouds that move across the sky
    I see the wind that moves the clouds away
    It moves the clouds over by the building
    I pick the building that I want to live in

    I smell the pine trees and the peaches in the woods
    I see the pinecones that fall by the highway
    That’s the highway that goes to the building
    I pick the building that I want to live in

    It’s over there, it’s over there
    My building has every convenience
    It’s gonna make life easy for me
    It’s gonna be easy to get things done
    I will relax alone with my loved ones

    Loved ones, loved ones visit the building,
    take the highway, park and come up and see me
    I’ll be working, working but if you come visit
    I’ll put down what I’m doing, my friends are important

    Don’t you worry ’bout me
    I wouldn’t worry about me
    Don’t you worry ’bout me
    Don’t you worry ’bout me

    I see the states, across this big nation
    I see the laws made in Washington, D.C.
    I think of the ones I consider my favorites
    I think of the people that are working for me

    Some civil servants are just like my loved ones
    They work so hard and they try to be strong
    I’m a lucky guy to live in my building
    They all need buildings to help them along

    It’s over there, it’s over there
    My building has every convenience
    It’s gonna make life easy for me
    It’s gonna be easy to get things done
    I will relax along with my loved ones

    Loved ones, loved ones visit the building
    Take the highway, park and come up and see me
    I’ll be working, working but if you come visit
    I’ll put down what I’m doing, my friends are important

    I wouldn’t worry ’bout
    I wouldn’t worry about me
    Don’t you worry ’bout me
    Don’t you worry ’bout ME……….

  83. John McCain? Gotta be Nugent. Just a proud Amurrican.

    Chuck Baldwin? John Ashcroft

    Ralph Nader? Kim Jong Il

    Bob Barr? Kinky Friedman

  84. That guy who did “Tax Freedom Day” for Barr.

  85. Biden needs a band too…

    How about Anal Cunts – Teenage Enema Nurses?

  86. Man, I’d crap my pants if Barr could get the Kinks (as long as it were the Kinks circa 1967 and not the tired, boring shell of their former selves they became.) Still, best rock band ever. But they’re…British. I think that kind of disqualifies them. Also, Rush is Canadian. Maybe we can find a way to resuscitate Hasil Adkins.

    I’m not a Boss fan, but is he that bad? Then again, Billy Joel alone accounts for several reasons to vote against Obama.

  87. I blame Semiapies for dragging me into this sordid mess.

    McCain: Electric Six, “Nuclear War on the Dance Floor.” Scissor Sisters, “Filthy / Gorgeous.” Ted Nugent (preferably in full Uncle Sam Nuge regalia, because, damn, he doth rock and is a smart GOPer)

    Beyond that, I got nothin’. Hail Satan!

  88. John McCain? Tom Jones

    Chuck Baldwin? Cristy Lane

    Ralph Nader? Bruce Hornsby

    Bob Barr? KISS

  89. Nader: “Everything causes cancer” – Jamie Kelly

    That’s Everything gives you cancer.
    There’s no cure. There’s no answer.

    I loves me some Joe Jackson.

    Kevin

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