Let the Gaymes Begin

Ed Brayton of the terrific blog Dispatches from the Culture Wars has the find of the day, an hilarious goof from OneNewsNow, the news-ish publication of the American Family Association (AFA).  AFA apparently has implemented a policy of substituting "homosexual" whenever the word "gay" appears in wire stories that appear on its website.

That resulted in a fantastic write-up of this weekend's Olympic track and field trials, which were dominated by sprinter Tyson Gay.  AFA has since corrected the article, but before they did, it read like juicy, possibly libelous gay sports porn.  A few excerpts, courtesy of Brayton:

Tyson Homosexual was a blur in blue, sprinting 100 meters faster than anyone ever has.

His time of 9.68 seconds at the U.S. Olympic trials Sunday doesn't count as a world record, because it was run with the help of a too-strong tailwind. Here's what does matter: Homosexual qualified for his first Summer Games team and served notice he's certainly someone to watch in Beijing.

"It means a lot to me," the 25-year-old Homosexual said. "I'm glad my body could do it, because now I know I have it in me."

[…]

Wearing a royal blue uniform with red and white diagonal stripes across the front, along with matching shoes, all in a tribute to 1936 Olympic star Jesse Owens, Homosexual dominated the competition. He started well and pulled out to a comfortable lead by the 40-meter mark.

This time, he kept pumping those legs all the way through the finish line, extending his lead. In Saturday's opening heat, Homosexual pulled way up, way too soon, and nearly was caught by the field, before accelerating again and lunging in for fourth place.

[…]

After the race, Homosexual and Dix looked at each other and slapped palms, then hugged.