Iowa Bans Erotic Corn Dogs
A ban on the Iowa State Fair's traditional erotic corn dog eating contest is in the works. The contest is organized by a radio station, but the fair is government-sponsored.
"I was waiting for that," [Steve "Round Guy" Pilchen, one of the radio personalities who invented the contest] said Tuesday in a telephone interview from the Urbandale radio station. "While it's very popular and, I think, ingeniously creative, it makes sense that this would be just the thing that conservative, politically correct people would be up in arms about."
Pilchen defends the contest's educational value:
"We stress technique," Pilchen said.
But regardless of Iowa's decision on educational censorship (it's practically book-burning, no?) the event was never "for the children":
Radio station staff shooed away children, Pilchen said. He said that when he asked a small group of young boys to leave, the parents assured him that they didn't care if the boys watched. "I said, 'You know what? I care. Get 'em outta here,' " he said.
For other Iowa State Fair grotesqueries/politicians go here.
Via Mark Lambert
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Here's one time when I agree with Reason; governments shouldn't sponsor stuff like this.
The raido show can always host their own event and pay for it themselves.
Seriously, though, both KMW's headline "Iowa Bans Erotic Corn Dogs" and lede "A ban on the Iowa State Fair's traditional erotic corn dog eating contest is in the works." are both at best misleading and at worst wrong, according to the linked story.
E-ROTIC! E-ROTIC!
What else could erotic corndog eating be?
the money quote:
"We had ketchup and mustard, but the big hit was mayonnaise," he added.
And how could the same thing be called blowing and sucking at the same time?
...wait. Erotic corn dog contest?
Since when does anyone past puberty and with an IQ above 70 even eat corn dogs? Never mind use them to inflame unwary men's hearts!
The competition...is too tasteless according to at least one State Fair board member.
Because everything else about a state fair screams good taste.
the money quote
I think that is called the money shot.
Radio station staff shooed away children, Pilchen said. He said that when he asked a small group of young boys to leave, the parents assured him that they didn't care if the boys watched. "I said, 'You know what? I care. Get 'em outta here,' " he said.
That tears it. The Radio station can have whatever rules it wants on it's own dime. But if they're going to have this at the "State Fair" it is not they're place to override the wishes of parents on what is and is not appropriate for young boys to witness. It's practically state establishment of religion, no?
in re: eating corndogs, they're fucking delicious, as far as I can remember. So no hating on the delicious corndog.
Ottawa Reader is clearly ignorant of the deliciousity of the corn dog. Fucking Canadians.
FOOLS! TRAINING WOMEN TO BITE THE "CORNDOG" AFTER PLEASURING IT? ARE YOU INSANE? THE URKOBOLD MUST SIT DOWN.
Don't sweat it, URKS, old chap. It's Iowa, so they probably play David Allen Coe's "Don't Bite The Dick" at least 15 times a night.
THE URKOBOLD FEELS WOOZY.
Clearly regulators have previously been too soft on Big Corn Dog.
BOUNCY BOUNCY!
so this is what people do in Iowa eh?
I'm actually from iowa, and this seems pretty extreme for us. Our politicians don't usually try to censor much.
Cheer up, URKS, it's not like Maine is banning it's annual lobster smooching contest.
You guys are getting slack. Where's the outrage over the true injustice here - the government of Iowa forcing citizens, at the point of a gun, to fund a Marxist "state fair"?
Since when does anyone past puberty and with an IQ above 70 even eat corn dogs? Never mind use them to inflame unwary men's hearts!
I'm both and I do. Blow it out yer ...! 😉
Since when does anyone past puberty and with an IQ above 70 even eat corn dogs?
and I'm neither. So there.
"Ottawa Reader is clearly ignorant of the deliciousity of the corn dog. Fucking Canadians"
Haven't we annexed them yet?
the fair is government-sponsored
End of story, end of debate.
You guys are getting slack.
They have always been slack on government assistance to the business / wealthy sector. They only really oppose welfare that poor people receive.
Fair helps KGGO (until now). KGGO is a proud member of the Citadel Broadcasting family. Citadel Broadcasting is the largest pure play radio company in the United States, with a strong national footprint reaching more than 50 markets. Our company is comprised of 177 FM stations and 66 AM stations in the nation's leading markets. In addition to our strong national footprint, Citadel Broadcasting also owns and operates ABC Radio Networks, which creates and distributes programming to more than 4,000 affiliates. Corporatarian Reason is not going to be critical of fair, unless and until it acts contrary to the best interests of Citadel. QED. Won't somebody pls think of the shareholders.
JBinMO, Shh!
We're waiting till Quebec secedes, then we'll roll up the rest of 'em like a Rastafarian's joint! Didn't you get the memo?
Quick, guys! A couple of whiny assholes have figured us out! Hide! Our actions could never be explained by the fact we like making corn dog jokes!
Katherine, I've been too harsh on you. Whatever I may differ with you on, it's clear that you come up with some pretty awesome topics. And often better graphics than the other bloggers.
OK, not as awesome as Jacob Sullum's topics, but dude got dibs on the hallucinogens beat. Them's the breaks.
Could this be wurse than the New Braunfels Wurst Fest?
"The fest kicks off with the traditional 'biting of the sausage'..."
Ha! I finally got one of you to admit "the memo" exists!!!!!!!!
c'mon guys. hay guys. GUYS! c'mon. It makes that whining sound from all the Five Alarm Chili Sauce.
Mmmmmoooooommmmm. I ordered a cheeseburger.
And Rudi is a "libertarian"*
C'mon. You don't want the terrorists to win. Guys. Hay. Come back hier. Hay. wait.
oooooooohhhhh. Who pantsed me?
ow. I don't want a purple nurple.
Ewwww. Wet willie. with a corn dog, soaked in... oh you did not.
runs off to find Awik Dunderooooo and Edwardddddddd(ild)oooooooooooo.
*even in jest, this citizen couldn't type that phrase in straight form...
I need pictures to evaluate this properly.
"You didn't complain about something in the way we wanted you to complain so that we could complain about your complaining! Wah!"
[runs off to tell Mommy about the mean kids]
Gee, Dave, it's amazing how you always find exactly what you expect to find, isn't it? Do you take that as evidence of your prescience and perspicacity?
TRUE, THOREAU. AFTER ALL, WHO INTRODUCED THE URKOBOLD TO THE GLORIES THAT ARE THE WEIBSKOBOLD (FKA "LOBSTER GIRL")?
you mean we can't make corn dog jokes and make fun of conservative state fair people because that's somehow in conflict with not wanting the state to fund the damn fair?
I'm so confused
Dave,
You couldn't have worked in a bit about how the trans fat-fried corn coating causes diabetes? Or how the Reason Foundation won't make mention of that because they're in the pocket of Big Corn? You must be slipping.
David:
I think we know why
It also offered a "White Trash Scavenger Hunt," where contestants had to find and photograph fairgoers with a mullet haircut, a fanny pack, missing teeth, visible thong underwear or a lower-back tattoo it called a "tramp stamp."
Wow... and how long did they expect this "scavenger hunt" to take? 3, maybe 4 minutes?
The scavenger hunt was canceled when it was discovered that all the entrants met the criteria that they would have been searching for.
[With an eye towards fairness] KGGO's James said. "I got several comments about an erotic taco-eating contest for next year."
Wait, lower back tattoos are "white trash" now? Damn, every other woman under a certain age here in Manhattan, White, Black, Hispanic or Asian, has one of those tattoos. I guess its like how Burberry stuff went from chic to "chav" while I wasn't looking.
Ottawa Reader is clearly ignorant of the deliciousity of the corn dog. Fucking Canadians.
If you mean we're unaware of corn dogs, that's not quite true. Here, though, we call them pogos (why, I don't know).
Americans for their part are ignorant of the deliciousness of poutine...;)
(Fries+Gravy+Cheese=Bliss.)
Americans for their part are ignorant of the deliciousness of poutine...;)
(Fries+Gravy+Cheese=Bliss.)
I can feel my arteries harden just thinking about them. Sounds like they'd be yummy after closing time.
Fries+Gravy+Cheese=Bliss
This American is not ignorant of this deliciousness 🙂
Mitch:
I know what you mean about the prevalence of the lower back tatoo. Maybe it's only white trash if you have one in conjunction with a muffin top?
An Ottawa Reader,
WHAT? POON TANG? NO, THE URKOBOLD IS FAMILIAR WITH THAT. ARE YOU CLAIMING THAT CANADIANS INVENTED IT?
I agree, the tramp-stamp has long served as an identifying mark of female proles of all persuasions.
Ah, it has come to my attention that HRC was at said fair.
All she had to do was compete in this competition and she would have been undefeatable in the race for the POTUS.
The lower back tattoo isn't a sign of white trash. It's a sign of herd following.
Lamar,
Spot on.
If you're going to get some art, at least get something even a little bit interesting.
Read: no one's paying any attention my trolling today! Hey everyone!! Look at me!!!
*to
teh lower back tattoos are social signals as well. i mean c'mon guys i know most of you are sci fi fans and all but you know what boys and girls do together sometimes if the mood is right and the beer is near? (or vice versa)
and no i will never get tired of baselessly slandering sci fi.
It also offered a "White Trash Scavenger Hunt," where contestants had to find and photograph fairgoers with a mullet haircut, a fanny pack, missing teeth, visible thong underwear or a lower-back tattoo it called a "tramp stamp."
Bonus points for any of the following:
--skinny pit bull
--married (to each other) siblings
--meth lab
An Ottawa Reader,
How come my name doesn't get capitalized? I'm hurt.
WHAT? POON TANG? NO, THE URKOBOLD IS FAMILIAR WITH THAT. ARE YOU CLAIMING THAT CANADIANS INVENTED IT?
Of course they did. Look it up.
A Canadian girl had my favourite lower back tattoo of all time: AMOR VINCIT OMNIA. "Love conquers all."
(Think about it--just not for too long or you'll go blind.)
an ottawa reader,
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
ITALICS ON, ITALICS OFF.
PLEASE READ THIS BOOK. IT'S WRITTEN IN ENGLISH, NOT CANADIAN, BUT PERHAPS YOU CAN STRUGGLE THROUGH IT.
There are Canadians on the blog? Slandering corn dogs and corn-fed, tattooed American sluts?
Damn maple sucking puck slappers.
they can have my corn dog when they pry it out of my cold, dead, mustardy fingers.
Not that I spend an excessive amount of time with my fingers wrapped around my corn dog
I want a corn dog with Thai chili sauce.
Me so hungry.
You've obviously never been to a SF convention.
Those ladies with the carts change a lot of sheets at the hotels...
zu sp?t, Hr Doktor T. Zu sp?t.
hier
Since when does anyone past puberty and with an IQ above 70 even eat corn dogs?
I certainly do. Well, I did until today.
VM,
We're wacky.
I can't possibly judge how scandalous this is unless I can see a video clip. YouTube has got nothin'.
Not that I spend an excessive amount of time with my fingers wrapped around my corn dog
And then only at night, under the covers, right?
hier Stevo. Enjoy.
thanks, ProGLib - answered on the same thread!
What is the special "social signal" of butt-antlers, anyway?
What is the special "social signal" of butt-antlers, anyway?
"Come'n get it?" Just guessing.
Well played for #69 on this thread. Well played.
*imagines moose with butt antlers... hmmmmm.
Sad. But I believe "suckin' on a chilli dog outside the Tastee Freez" remains legal in Indiana.
Wurstfest Rules BTW
Thanks for the link, VM. You're an amazing human being.
"I'll do you, but please don't come inside me."
What is the special "social signal" of butt-antlers, anyway?
it's like connect four, but just above the ass.
or something. i may be confusing that with connections, that show with that british guy.
Ah, yes. "Connections".
A great show.
Chili sauce. Hammer-sickle jewelry. A Whithered Taint, and a gently-loved neck stump.
Those are connected in beautiful ways.
"Fries+Gravy+Cheese=Bliss"
I think steak n shake has that. Chilly chees fries sound familiar?
poutine, right?
Fool! You haven't lived until you've had the corn dogs at the Jiffy Deli!
Gee, Dave, it's amazing how you always find exactly what you expect to find, isn't it? Do you take that as evidence of your prescience and perspicacity?
No, everybody has got their own hypocrisy (even joe). Nobody like to hear about it (even joe). Still, everybody needs to hear about it occasionally whether they like it or not. It makes people better over time.
For example, T. is much better to take than he used to be. I have never had a young Jedi protest so much, but a year or two later and I can see that all the effort and aggravation was worth it. He posts about the Iran and Iraq wars, for example, in a new way that means I don't have to. Brings a tear . . .
Now if I could just get "Weigs" Weigel to realize that Flight 93 was shot down, I might only show up on the Baillespie-Ward corporatarian thds -- and even there it look like they are finally letting Doherty kick out the hard jams just a bit on corporate subversion of the market issues.
Or the Corn Dogs at Charlie Biggs Chicken and Sauce.
What is the special "social signal" of butt-antlers, anyway?
I'm a rebel. I'm a wild child. I got a shitty, unimaginative tattoo just like 80% of my peers. Let's do jager-bombs!
de stijl: Do no hate on the jager blaster, man. Five of those + five long islands = AWESOME SWEET.
Dave, if everyone has their own hypocrisies, what's yours?
Randolph: He's a fat, lazy slob who loves delicious corn-sweetened cola.
I have a compromise for the whole sitchiashen:
The conservative assholes can sponsor a proper conservative lady who just sits their and refuses to participate. You know, abstinence and all that shit. I bet that would really turn them on.
to add to de stijl (who's absolutely right):
I'm not a mild mannered accountant who spends my life in a cubicle....I'm ass-antler babe!!!
if everyone has their own hypocrisies, what's yours?
Probably many.
I have a history of not appreciating my clients and/or employers as much as I should.
I returned from Canada even though my taxes will now be used to pay for a war I don't support. I did that, at least partially, for selfish reasons.
I am a brilliant artist yet I have not put out a new record album in almost a year (see farceswannamo.com for the last one).
I'm sure there's more.
Mr. Corndog Risin', Mr. Corndog Risin'
Mr. Corndog Risin', Mr. Corndog Risin'
Got to keep on risin'
Mr. Corndog Risin', Mr. Corndog Risin'
Corndog Risin', gotta Corndog Risin'
Mr. Corndog Risin', gotta keep on risin'
Risin', risin'
Gone risin', risin'
I'm gone risin', risin'
I gotta risin', risin'
Well, risin', risin'
I gotta, wooo, yeah, risin'
Woah, ohh yeah
In Soviet Union corn dog fellates YOU!
Is Dave Woycechowsky drunk or is it just me?
By the way, I don't know if I can say this,
or even if it's already been said,
but cato, jr. should "win" this "thread."
(Sorry no "double" ""quotes."")
...I mean this seems really funny right now, like just the perfect Aquaman reference...
I'm the Black Manta to Dave Woycechowsky's Aquaman!
There it is!
More Oktoberfest for me!
Any time someone says "Rubric" you gotta drink!
I am fond of reading magazines...prefer to purchase all my reading stuff from Couponalbum.com at discounted prices.....!!
So because its 'government-sponsored' they can't have any 'erotic' material??? First of all, I'm pretty sure (as Minnesota did when I lived there) they allow religious organizations to have booths and/or events on the premises, and secondly, since when did anything 'erotic' be considered in any way some sort of 'religious' activity. From a legal perspective the state could sponsor an 'Iowa orgy' and face no legitimate constitutional issues. As for corn dogs (aka Pronto Pups), I eat them every time I'm at the fair and as for erotic food contests we can do 'em with corn dogs, peaches, tacos, ice cream, etc.... so the nature of the food is really irrelevant.
Completely disgusting! Shows how perverted this country is.