Cheney! Come Back, Cheney!

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Ira Stoll reviews Stephen Hayes' Cheney bio:

My own guess—okay, hope—is that Mr. Cheney has taken a look at the Republican presidential field and sees an opening. If Iowa and New Hampshire Republicans start receiving copies of " Cheney" in their mailboxes, Mr. Cheney's popularity may yet begin to climb.

I'm not old enough to remember this: Does the country always go crazy in the death throes of a failed presidency? Was there a last-ditch "Draft Agnew" movement in 1976 or something? Because if the cadaverous stench of the Iraq War was enough to bring down John McCain—who, remember, used to be the most popular politician in America—then you couldn't dream up a worse 2008 candidate than Dick Cheney. Not from a policy perspective, not from a political perspective. At this point he'd probably lose Utah and Wyoming to a Gravel/Sharpton ticket.

… adding, I've read some of Cheney and its combination of fishing/baseball anecdotes and rosy-glasses Iraq War history didn't win me over to the Cult of Dick. But if someone wants to Fed Ex a bunch of books to Hawkeyes, have a blast.

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  1. Umm, yes. From a policy perspective too.

  2. David, your belief that Iraq derailed McCain shows what an idiot you are. Conservatives still support the war, but they don’t support infringements on free speech, the gang of fourteen and tax increases.

  3. A Gravel/Sharpton ticket? Hell, a Palpatine/Maul ticket would win.

  4. I was ten in 1973. No there was no “draft Agnew” movement, and as far as I can remember, even Nixon loyalists were happy to see him gone. Still, Agnew was just wildly corrupt; he wasn’t the architect of the stupidest war since the one about Jenkin’s Ear, so he might have had a better chance.

    I don’t think at this point it’s necessary to nominate an actual human to defeat Cheney. My Fox News-addicted in-laws despise the man; he’s lose Texas to a stuffed animal, even one Cheney didn’t shoot.

  5. I don’t think Agnew was Vice President in 1976. I also don’t think we were in the midst of a horribly failed Presidency in 1976. We were in the midst of a mildly failed one. The horribly failed Presidency ended some time before that.

  6. Steve Austin, I think you’re reading the paragraph backwards. It’s awkwardly phrased, but it appears to be saying that Cheney is in fact the worst possible candidate from a policy perspective.

  7. Who could possibly still support Cheney? I just don’t get it and it makes my head explode. Were these people brainwashed during a 9/11 PTSD phase, were they crazy beforehand, or are they all part of a neocon, Haliburton, big oil conspiracy? What is it? Please help me.

  8. Tim-

    I don’t know who actually supports Cheney, but I do know that if you meet him you should have some courtesy, some sympathy, and some taste. Use all your well-learned politesse, or he’ll lay your soul to waste.

    You think I’m joking, but he did hatch the plan to go to Iraq and kill their version of a czar (and all his ministers).

  9. David, your belief that Iraq derailed McCain shows what an idiot you are.

    You ignore my point that McCain used to be the most popular politician in America. Three years ago pundits speculated whether he could win as a third party candidate, even. The Iraq War killed his image among independents and Democrats, taking away one of the arguments for nominating him, and that played a huge role in his tumble.

  10. Who could possibly still support Cheney? I just don’t get it and it makes my head explode.

    Oh, you know: Hannity, Limbaugh, Mike Gallagher, Hugh Hewitt … America’s delusional class.

  11. Joe Lieberman has as much of a shot at a GOP nomination as John McCain. Which has always been none.

  12. My friend the cop supports Cheney. In fact, he was one of the earliest supporters of the “Impeach Bush” movement, because it would have put Cheney in charge. I’m afraid to ask him what Cheney’s appeal is, though.

  13. “John McCain-who, remember, used to be the most popular politician at the Washington Post

    There, Weigel, I fixed it for you.

  14. Cheney spelled backward is Yenehc, that sound you make when you have a chicken bone caught in your throat.

  15. Hey, now – lay off Walpole. He was a bit of a doofus, but even he wasn’t stupid enough to go to war for the sake of a chopped off ear. Said incident was just a pretext to start up the latest round of squabbling over access to the wealth of the Caribbean and South America, and pretexts don’t have to be smart, they just have to get the job done. (Cheney knows all about that, not so?)

  16. Mreh Mreh Mreh, I’m back. Boy, that satan character sure gets testy when you make suggestuion on how he could do his job better. Mreh Mreh.

  17. I haven’t read Cheney, but am reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Voldemort is based on Cheney, right?

    Voldemort in 2008!

  18. Dick Cheney would lose to Zombie Dick Nixon at this point.

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