Royal With Cheese

Prince Charles finally gives a little something to the beleagured reporters assigned to cover him, blurting out his desire to ban McDonald's.

Charles, a strong advocate of organic food, was touring the Imperial College London Diabetes Centre in Abu Dhabi with the Duchess of Cornwall.

He asked nutritionist Nadine Tayara: "Have you got anywhere with McDonald's, have you tried getting it banned? That's the key."

Royal observers said that Charles would have been aware that his comments would be picked by the media.

"He knew there was a reporter there and this is a subject close to his heart," said one source.

Question: Why is this "the key?" Long before Ray Kroc's leviathan slithered onto Charles' shores, Britons had some of the worst dietary habits on the planet. They breakfasted on a mound of saturated fats—black pudding, sausages, the rest of the "fry-up." They drank heavy, liver-mutilating beers. They ate seafood and potatoes fried in enough oil to power a retrofitted Aston Martin. The chief evolution of British food in the last few decades was the mainstreaming of Indian cuisine, carbohydrates and barely-legal meats slathered in creamy sauces. Oh, and then there are the British hamburger chains which predate the franchising of McDonalds.