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My Little Badnarik

Jesse Walker | 3.7.2006 5:51 PM

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Wonkette reports that my seven-month-old daughter is "the front-runner in the '08 Libertarian Party primaries." I attribute her success to her cagy campaign platform of "da da ga ga ga."

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NEXT: Hit or Schmidtz

Books Editor Jesse Walker is the author of Rebels on the Air and The United States of Paranoia.

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  1. MainStreamMan   19 years ago

    From
    http://www.thismodernworld.com/

    "The ?I?m really a libertarian? trend has been picking up steam lately among conservatives who want to seem reasonable in the face of undeniable corruption, but it should be pointed out that a real libertarian (assuming you can find one) wouldn?t spend half their time complaining about abortion, homosexuality, drug use, violent video games, etc. People who favor ?small government? tend to do so because they want to be left alone, but conservatism has shown us time and time again that when push comes to shove, imposing regressive social values always trumps any professed love of limited government."

    You guys are everywhere these days... strike while the climate is ripe. If you can only get the baby to explain the difference between positive and negative obligations inherent in compossible natural rights in a way that gets the voters out
    |-)

  2. dhex   19 years ago

    what a cute baby!

    and nick's kinda letting himself go, eh?

  3. Jeff P.   19 years ago

    Forgive me if someone else has mentioned this (i've been away for a few days): Would it constitute "irony" that the foremost Libertarian chatroom has an ad for a device that lets you endlessly tread water?

  4. smacky   19 years ago

    Congratulations, Jeff P.

    You win best comment of the day. And you're nominated for best comment of the week.

  5. Brian   19 years ago

    If only I had hair lush and rampant as Nick.

    Reynolds seems to be evolving into the soft, chinless look of the hard-ridden Bush bunboy.

  6. thoreau   19 years ago

    Excellent comment, Jeff!

    And that is one cute baby. Although I will arm wrestle any and all takers to defend the honor of my nieces and nephews, whom I maintain are the most adorable children on the planet.

  7. Warren   19 years ago

    We?ve said it before, we?ll say it again: Getting drunk with libertarians is fun!

    Hey the word is getting out. Sing it loud sister! And when you're ready, we'll introduce you to the rest of the anti-prohibition platform.

  8. Frank_A   19 years ago

    Mr. Walker, that's one cute baby you got there!
    And if it's lucky enough, it will achieve political obscurity by 5! Yay!

  9. mediageek   19 years ago

    "And that is one cute baby. Although I will arm wrestle any and all takers to defend the honor of my nieces and nephews, whom I maintain are the most adorable children on the planet."

    You're on. There's none cuter than my 4-year-old nephew.

  10. Totally uncalled for   19 years ago

    I've confused Gillespie and Welch before but now I'm sure. Gillespie is the fat one.

    Must be the HFCS.

  11. Jeff P.   19 years ago

    I was a damned cute baby, and I have the photos to prove it.

    I'm challenging everyone to a baby-photo cute-off over at Grylliade. I'm at work until 10p, so someone else will have to start it.

  12. johnl   19 years ago

    Good looking baby but I don't think you can train her enough in the next two years. My 5 year old got some 9 year old girls wigged out the other day by repeating a story I tell him often that girl scout cookies are so good because they are made from real girl scouts. He's off to a good start. Also, he eats trout eyeballs. I got to get some video of that.

  13. Native NYer   19 years ago

    So we're supporting the baby now? I thought the kid who stole the bus during the New Orleans flood and got his neighbors to the shelters in Texas was going to be a shoe in.

  14. Jason S.   19 years ago

    I attribute her success to her cagy campaign platform of "da da ga ga ga."

    Makes more sense than blowing up the U.N. Building or chaining prisoners to their beds for 12 hours a day.

  15. linguist   19 years ago

    Looks like a pretty fun night!

    And...very cute baby.

    And Jeff P., you rule.

  16. Karen   19 years ago

    Having produced two perfectly adorable babies of my own, I am qualified as an expert witness on the subject. That is one cute little girl, Mr. Walker.

    Also, it looked like a fun party. Politics should have more events involving both booze and babies. Kudos also for the line "take what you want, but drink all you take."

  17. thoreau   19 years ago

    Who are the people in the picture near the bottom, with the caption "someone's trying to regulate something. I can feel it"?

  18. biologist   19 years ago

    Native NYer:

    that kid is the candidate for VP for the LP

  19. biologist   19 years ago

    Jesse

    where does your daughter stand on:

    medical MJ?
    recreational MJ?
    evolution vs ID?
    parental notification for abortions for minors?

  20. Jesse Walker   19 years ago

    Da da ga ga ga.

  21. biologist   19 years ago

    that's more coherent than the answers we get from any other candidates

  22. happyjuggler0   19 years ago

    If it weren't for the part of the Constitution that says you have to be at least 35 years old to be elected POTUS then I'd say the baby has the best chance of getting elected of any LP POTUS candidate to date.

    On second thought, the baby has the best chance of getting elected of any LP POTUS candidate to date. 🙁

  23. Frank_A   19 years ago

    Not only that, it's better than complaining about how you support fascism when you get a driver's license from the DMV.
    Da da, ga ga ga, that's political money in the bank! Count me SOLD!

  24. joshua corning   19 years ago

    I really want to make fun of nick's middle aged gut but considering that a bald guy with a red a white raindeer sweater is standing next to him with an even bigger gut sort of kills it.

  25. Rhywun   19 years ago

    A big gut doesn't provide the humor it once did for me, now that I have one.

  26. Tymothi Loving   19 years ago

    ??someone?s trying to regulate something. I can feel it."

    OK, that's just funny to me.

  27. Warren   19 years ago

    cute kid Jesse, who is the four-eyed raven haired babe he's got strapped to his back?

  28. Mr. F. Le Mur   19 years ago

    http://www.thismodernworld.com/
    Which is worse, "This Modern World" or "Boondocks"?

    "the front-runner in the '08 Libertarian Party primaries."
    and
    Would it constitute "irony" that the foremost Libertarian chatroom has an ad for a device that lets you endlessly tread water?
    "Libertarian candidate" is self-contradictory in a way. Sorta. Someone like Burt Rutan, who builds his own spaceship rather than petitioning NASA, strikes me as a libertarian role model more than any political candidates (please don't nail me with the details about his probably federal grants!)

    I don't expect the gov't to do much of anything to secure my freedoms (just the opposite), so I do it myself in small ways.
    -- Would never be caught dead working for the gov't (income by force 'n' theft 'n' deception).
    -- Haven't filed a tax return in about 12 years (my income is not their business).
    -- Don't use the State's licensed representatives for medical care; if I want pills, I don't ask for permission, I get a friend to smuggle them from Mexico.
    -- Half the people in the little towns around here are getting some sort of bogus (really!) disability payment; I could do the same but don't.
    -- Etc. I'd like to get arrested for not having a driver's license, but ya gotta draw the line somewhere.

    Oh yeah - babies evoke my "cute response."

  29. emme   19 years ago

    Nick's managed to pull off something that few men can actually do. He's become fat and skinny at the same time.

  30. Jesse Walker   19 years ago

    Warren: My wife appreciates the compliment. She'd also like me to remind you that the baby is a she, not a he.

  31. Stormy Dragon   19 years ago

    How do libertarian babies rebel when they reach their teenage years?

  32. happyjuggler0   19 years ago

    The fact that your initial post says she is your daughter strongly implies she is a she, however when the baby is in blue it is normal to assume she is a he until proven otherwise. So if the poster missed your "daughter" remarks....

    Or do most parents these days not care about baby clothes colors anymore, giving boys pink clothes now too? Or is there a double standard nowadays that says it is ok to put baby girls in blue but not baby boys in pink?

    I'm not really trying to cause trouble, just seems a natural instinct. 😮

  33. keith   19 years ago

    Stormy Dragon,

    Funny you should ask. No foolin', my second college girlfriend gave me a subscription to Workers Vanguard.

  34. Jesse Walker   19 years ago

    Or is there a double standard nowadays that says it is ok to put baby girls in blue but not baby boys in pink?

    Bingo.

  35. happyjuggler0   19 years ago

    How do libertarian babies rebel when they reach their teenage years?

    They vote for, and campaign vigorously for Chelsea Clinton, making her the third POTUS from the same family, which is a record. Or....

    They vote for candidates who say "We need to raise taxes to reduce the deficit". Or....

    They move to Germany because "they are more socially responsible". Or....

    They join a citizen's watch group that keeps tabs on prostitutes and people who smoke in doorways or the bathroom and turns them in to police.

  36. mk   19 years ago

    Happyjuggler0,
    Stop it man. You are scaring me.
    I can see it now "Dad, I've decided to join the ROTC at my school" Me: "NOOOO!! You are no child of mine!"
    I'm gonna have enough trouble during the teen years if my daughter ends up looking at all like her mother.

  37. mediageek   19 years ago

    "How do libertarian babies rebel when they reach their teenage years?"

    They stop listening to RUSH and start listening to Rage Against the Machine.

  38. Stevo Darkly   19 years ago

    ... and they register for the draft.

  39. thoreau   19 years ago

    When they're 16, rebellious teens with libertarian parents go to the DMV and get a driver's license.

    In the Badnarik household, that would be a bold statement of defiance!

  40. Rick Barton   19 years ago

    Wonkette has miss-translated the infantese spoken by Jesse's adorable daughter. "Da da ga ga ga" actually means that she's ga ga for her Da da : crazy for her daddy. This may be interpreted not as a statement of the precious child's own candidacy, but rather as her endorsement of her daddy, our Jesse, for the '08 Libertarian Party presidential nomination!!

    Wonkette, to avoid this type of error in the future, I suggest that you check into the volume; Infantese for Democrats and other Dummies

    (Please note that I am, of course, in no way inferring here that the quite hep Wonkette is a Democrat)

  41. Stevo Darkly   19 years ago

    At Wonkette's site, I clicked a link in the comments that led to another link ... and stumbled across this very focused blog:

    http://www.functionalfate.org/

  42. Rick Barton   19 years ago

    Stevo,

    Hep. Very hep.

  43. CharlesWT   19 years ago

    Pink
    HBC has noted pink used for children's clothes as early as the 18th century. We do not, however, yet fully understand the gender connotations. We have noted pink use in paintings and variety of observations. At one point pink was considered more of a boy's color, as a watered-down red, which is a fierce color) and blue was morefor girls. The associate of pink with bold, dramatic red clearly affected its use for boys. An American newspaper in 1914 advised mothers, "If you like the color note on the little one's garments, use pink for the boy and blue for the girl, if you are a follower of convention." [
    The Sunday Sentinal, March 29, 1914.] A woman's magazine in 1918 informed mothers, "There has been a great diversity of opinion on the subject, but the generally accepted rule is pink for the boy and blue for the girl. The reason is that pink being a more decided and stronger color is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is pertier for the girl." [Ladies Home Journal, June, 1918] This undoubteldy strikes modern readers as very surprising indeed. Some sources suggest it was not until the 1940s that the modern gender associations with color became universally accepted.
    Gender and Color

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