Kate's Comeback

You knew it was only a matter of time that Kate Moss would adopt the "throw yourself at the mercy of the public" strategy. In a statement (no doubt penned by a battery of lawyers), she admitted: "I take full responsibility for my actions… I also accept that there are various personal issues that I need to address and have started taking the difficult, yet necessary, steps to resolve them."

Indeed, but particularly odd was the shocked denial of her lawyer that Moss had smoked crack cocaine at a party at home. That she should get high like a celebrity is one thing, but that she should do it like a vulgar street waif is something altogether different. Next, expect the recovery phase, where Moss' agents will leak photos of her attending some rehab program, followed by her transformation into a model of resurrected cleanliness, which should win her back a contract or two, though Kate will have to frequently issue boilerplate remarks about how much she really hated doing drugs, but was, well, you know, a desperate prisoner.

Don't sniff, it'll probably work.