Do Not Taunt Water Yo-Yo!

Reader Kevin "kevrob" Robinson points to this story about a prospective Illinois ban on those rubbery yo-yo-ball toys and notes its eerie resemblance to a certain Saturday Night Live sketch. The toys are apparently blamed for "about 400 choking and strangulation injuries nationwide." Next: A ban on rope.

Comments

[David]

Couldn't you garrote someone just as easily with a regular yo-yo?

[Lowdog]

I remember that skit. Reading the transcript had me laughing out loud!

Ok, on the serious stuff: "What I'm most pleased about is the state of Illinois believes child product safety is of key importance, and we need to send that message loud and clear to every governor in the country." Lisa Lipin

Ok, she goes and gets Wal-Mart and some other places to stop carrying the product, but that's not enough. She has to save even more children from their own stupidity.

Look, maybe the product is a bad product and shouldn't be sold to kids, or anyone else for that matter, but why can't you just make some fucking flyers, or start a phone campaign or something? Get the news stations to run a story on how dangerous the "happy fun ball" is. But you go to your governor and the legislature and have them create some new shitty law...give me a damn break!

These are the kinds of people that are weighing us down. Thank gad her child didn't actually die - she woulda started getting everything banned. (And yes, I'm glad little Jimmy didn't die regardless. Unless he's just stupid, then maybe mother nature should take care of his ass.)

[thoreau]

Forget yoyo balls. Let's ban the real killer: Dihydrogen monoxide!

[TheDumbFish]

Toy telephones with their dangerous cords can be dangerous as well.

[joe]

"She has to save even more children from their own stupidity." Can't be taking a patriarchal attitude towards children, now.

Sometimes, an odd sort of genius emerges on these threads. It's almost like performance art.

David, the combination of a weight at the end and the elasticity of the "string" makes it much easier for this to wrap around a neck and tighten than a normal yo-yo.

[Julian Sanchez]

Ok, joe... would you settle for some kind of sticker saying "don't buy this for children under 10" or something? I wouldn't give a 2-year-old a plastic bag to play with either, but I don't know if we need to ban everything--or every toy--that's not toddler safe. I'm going to go out on a limb and assume the vast majority of these purported injuries were among very young children whose parents probably ought have known better.

[David]

The combination of a weight at the end and the elasticity of the "string" makes it much easier for this to wrap around a neck and tighten than a normal yo-yo. At least the soft water-filled rubber ball won't knock someone's teeth out.

[joe]

"I'm going to go out on a limb and assume the vast majority of these purported injuries were among very young children whose parents probably ought have known better."

And the sins of the father shall be visited on the son.

I don't think we need to ban every toy that isn't toddler safe, either. Nor, as far as I can tell, does Gov. Blagovich or anyone else. But this particular toy seems to a have a design problem.

[drf]

argh. who can we vote for here in illinois?

ritchie is in trouble if Jesse junior runs. Blago (aka gov chicagovich) is such a tool who looks like a mon-chi-chi. maybe we should ban those toys, too.

joe: as for the labeling, there were no labels on nuthin' in denmark, yet there were no stories about killer toys or what-not.

just an observation.

[joe]

David,

Bumps a bruises are a normal part of growing up. A toy that, through normal kiddie play, can wrap around your neck and squeeze without being able to be removed by those same kiddies is something else entirely.

[scape]

Can we ban Yo-Yo Ma? He hurts my ears.

[R C Dean]

A toy that, through normal kiddie play, can wrap around your neck and squeeze without being able to be removed by those same kiddies is something else entirely.

How is it, again, that (absent some extraordinary circumstances) a child cannot remove a string that is wrapped around his chubby little neck, even if it has a few ounces of weight at one end?

[Franklin Harris]

"Toy telephones with their dangerous cords can be dangerous as well."

What? Haven't all kids upgraded to toy cell phones yet?

[Ben]

joe--Do you honestly believe this is the most pressing matter the legislature should be focusing on, or are you just trying to antagonize a bunch of libertarians?
I'm sure we could all sit here and come up with a bunch of toys that are just as "dangerous" as this one. Should they all be banned?

[TheDumbFish]

Cordless phones are dangerous as well. To the extent that they could be considered weapons.

[joe]

RC,

It's a stretchy elastic material. You swing the toy, the cord stretches. If the cord hits something, the ball continues to revolve, wrapping the cord around the object. Then, when it stops, the centrifigul force that stretched the cord goes away, and the cord shortens, ie, the circle tightens.

A little kid could certainly be able to swing something like that around, but lack the strength and dexterity to git his fingers under the tightly stretched material to remove it.

[Lowdog]

Yes joe, I didn't remain perfectly calm and knowingly said some "crazy" things about kids being stupid and dying as a result. But you didn't even address my actual points. Things like "Get the news stations to run a story on how dangerous the "happy fun ball" is. But you go to your governor and the legislature and have them create some new shitty law..."

That's what makes me mad about crap like this. There are other avenues than running to your pols, crying about some "evil" product endangering your children.

What about the BBB? From their site: Since the founding of the first BBB in 1912, the BBB system has proven that the majority of marketplace problems can be solved fairly through the use of voluntary self-regulation and consumer education.

But no, just go running to your protectors. That's just what they want you to do. That way you can blame someone else for your mistakes...

[Phil]

a toy consisting of a liquid-filled ball and elastic cord that has been blamed for about 400 choking and strangulation injuries nationwide . . .

Can they be more specific here about what "injuries" covers? Are there any fatalities involved here? 1? 100? Zero? Maybe these "injuries" are no worse than the "bumps a bruises [sic]" that joe feels are "a normal part of childhood." Without a little more specificity, that 400 sure sounds scary, but I want more info. And what time frame does that cover, anyway?

The governor's move comes as a result of a two-year nationwide lobbying push against the toy by Lisa Lipin, a Skokie mother whose 5-year-old son was nearly strangled by a yo-yo water ball in 2003.

"Nearly strangled?" To death, or . . . what? This is bad writing.

Despite hundreds of injuries attributed to the toy, the Consumer Product Safety Commission has determined it does not meet federal standards for a recall.

Well, I guess the Governor of Illinois is better at figuring these things out than the CPSC. Right, joe?

[Jason Ligon]

Question: Should we ban the Red Rider BB Gun? Answer: Hell no!

Slap a sticker on it and call it a day.

[free form]

TheDumbFish, thanks for the link--that's a riot! The Bag o' Glass hits home in an uncomfortable way, as The Bad Parent remembers an incident from several years ago. I found an Altoids tin that made a pleasant tinkling sound, and opened it up to find -- you got it-- broken glass! My kid had a hard time explaining what he wanted with it, but it turns out not only did he like the color of the pink glass, but he and his friend used it for game pieces for some game they made up.

I didn't take it away from him.

[Stretch]

This reminds me of a lable I saw on a bucket the other day. Warning: Small children can fall into bucket and drown.

Apparently, they can drown in the time it takes to answer a telephone. But does that mean we should ban buckets? What about older children who want to play with this toy. Hell, I'm 27 and I think it sounds fun. Maybe I'll go buy one before they're gone forever.

[Jeff]

Where's Irving Mainway's Jonny Human Torch costume? "a bag of oily rags and a lighter."

[thoreau]

Stretch-

Buckets don't drown people, Dihydrogen Monoxide does!

[joe]

Phil, "strangled" is one of those words like "drowned" that has "to death" implied. If it wasn't almost "to death," the better word choice is "choked."

[joe]

I'm open to the idea that the proper regulatory action for the government to take is to label the toy, rather than ban it, Phil. Happy?

[free form]

Actually, I think the strangling/choking distinction is this:

Strangling happens from outside (hands or ligatures around the neck), and choking happens from inside (objects blocking the air passage to the lungs).

[Phil]

I'm not taking a side either way here on whether it should be banned or not, joe. I was questioning the quickness to which you jumped to defend the governor's actions -- I suspect for no other reason than to take yet another glorious moment to bash what you charmingly call "libertoids" -- when all we have is, apparently, 400 unspecified injuries, a statement from the CPSC that the product does not rise to the level of a safety recall, and that's pretty much it.

If it killed all 400 kids, and did it in a year? Fuck yeah, get it off the market. It's a genuine hazard. If it's 400 bruised necks in five years? No, sorry. That's life.

[metalgrid]

I just don't get the reasoning of you 'liberal' nanny staters.

You want to stop stupid people from killing themselves. You want to stop stupid people's kids from killing themselves. You want to interfere with the way evolution and natural selection works.

Then you get pissed off when these people you save become republicans and/or want to teach intelligent design in schools.

Obviously you people are not smart enough to see where your patch leads you.

[Stretch]

Yes, thoreau, dihydrogen monoxide is indeed the dangerous part. Even a very tiny amount can be lethal.

[jc]

If anyone's worked in a factory, you know the problem with labelling or "flagging" is that eventually so many things get flagged that the flags get ignored. Same with bans - see "War On Drugs" for details.

And blaming the retailers for putting the product on the shelf still does nothing to correct the design problem of the product. I'm not expecting Lipin to behave rationally in such circumstances, but that's the whole fucking point behind the concept of the legislature. If knee-jerk reaction is all a legislature can come up with, we can pretty much do that on our own without them. Instead we have perverted to the point where the legislature has carte blanche to be driven by emotion while selected portions of the general public must be completely rational if they don't want to be subject to the criminal sanction.

I find it very sad that a resident of Skokie is pleased that the target of all the criminal sanction is directed at the merchant class. Sounds an awful lot like Europe 70-80 years ago.

[thoreau]

Stretch-

Did you know that dihydrogen monoxide is the primary component of acid rain?

I hear that the Navy is conducting top secret experiments on ways to exploit dihydrogen monoxide for warfare.

[ed]

Just ban childhood and get it over with already.

[scape]

Back in the day I imagine cave-moms grunted at their kids whenever they stuck a rock in their mouth or crawled too close to the fire. Now the government should grunt for us?

The yo-yo water ball is an updated version of the rock and string. In the 70's they used two rocks and called them clackers. I think we'll survive without a ban or a warning label.

[kanabiis]

400 injuries in no specified amount of time and the product is banned by law. Looks like the supplier company is from China or something. 400 injuries, none of them death is nothing.

I cant believe they havent banned bicycles yet then, according to this website:
http://depts.washington.edu/hiprc/practices/topic/bicycles/
750 people die each year riding bicycles, half a million are treated in emergency rooms each year. 400 people over the life of the product being sold is nothing. Hell my son has had a bloody nose twice this week from his stupid basketball, you dont see me screaming for its bannation....

I blame this on stupid parents....

[joe]

free form,

A choke-hold. A choker (jewelery). Choke the life out of her.

Methinks chocking can be internal or external, but strangling is always external.

[Number 6]

Whatever else is true here, it is the case that the Sun-Times story was a biased piece of shit. No comment from the company. No comments from people opposing the ban, or an explanation of why someone might oppose it. No clear explanation of what the supposed threat is. No specifics about the supposed strangulation episode. In other words, pathethic, irresponsible journalism.

[kevrob]

Is there any more insidious element of the ratchet-effect of bigger and bigger government than the way local TV news whores itself out to scaremongers looking to ban the next "dangerous product"? Without that pressure, even hacks like Blagojevich would be more sensible.

Folks should stop ragging on joe. His contrarian (to us, anyway) posts are an inevitable result when a social democrat chooses to troll on a libertarian board. If we lived in the same town I'd invite him over for some beers and a friendly game of lawn darts.

Kevin

[David]

I miss my old Jarts.

[Number 6]

Honestly, without people like Joe and GM, we would all just be a bunch of like minded people intellectually jerking each other off. Despite the fact that they occasionally infuriate me (GM more so than Joe), I'm personally glad that they are here.

[R C Dean]

joe, you've got one highly unlikely scenario where a kid would wrap it around his neck and not be able to get it off. Its not impossible that a kid could stand right next to something that the ball could wrap around after it wrapped around his neck, but it strikes me as next to impossible. After all, if the ball was going to wrap around this hypothetical object after wrapping around the little crumbcruncher's neck (that is, on the second orbit), why didn't it wrap around the object on the first orbit, before wrapping the neck? Color me unimpressed.

More likely that the little bugger's sibling tried to garrote him with it, in my opinion.

We can pretty well take it as read there have been no fatalities or serious injuries. If there were, the article would have trumpeted them.

[jc]

Perhaps joe is a plant by Reason to pump up the number for the margin ad sales.

If he's not, he's helping them out anyway.

[19th Century Bumpkin]

Stretch said:
"Apparently, they can drown in the time it takes to answer a telephone. But does that mean we should ban buckets?"

Actually, I'd be happy if it was the telephone they banned. Them things is EVIL! The work of the Devil, if ever there was!

Buckets, at least, have actual utility. Phones are just ways for other people to annoy the shit out of me.

[ChicagoTom]

Although I think that in this particular instance legislation to ban the product is huge overkill, I am curious.

It seems that this product is be unsafe for younger kids. What would be an acceptable level of action? Asking the company who makes them to stick a label on them? Asking for a recall of the product? What if the company refuses? And who should do the asking?
Individual consumers?
The government?

I'm guessing complaints have been filed and that is how they got the attention of legislators to begin with. It seems like there is a valid concern about the safety of children using this toy. (Although I am not expert, I imagine that the number of injuries caused by this toy is higher than most other toys for that age group or even compared to similar families / types of toys) So I guess I am asking, what is the appropriate (if any) level of government action that would not upset the libertarian minded individual? Mandatory labeling? Mandatory recall ? Or do we just stick to self policing and hope that the comapny is gonna do the right thing despite the risk of lost profits if it recalls or warns that their product may not be safe for the targeted demographic?

On a side note, is it really that acceptable for people we judge to be less intelligent (because they get hurt by toys or such) to just get hurt or die? Is survival of the fittest really the philosophy that should be the bedrock of society??
I always believed that it is that sense of enlightenment and community and allegiance to our fellow people that sets us apart from wild animals. Id be curious to hear what others think.

[Akira MacKenzie]

Heh heh... I had one of the most dangerous toys of all time as a kid: The Battlestar Galactica Viper from Mattel. Unlike the child who was involved in the incident that prompt it's maker to glue the missiles in place, I wasn't stupid enough to stick mine in my mouth.

[Lowdog]

Look, I was being somewhat silly when I said that "She has to save even more children from their own stupidity. I don't think society should be based on survival of the fittest.

However, why I feel the way I do is because in my mind, one of the biggest problems this world is facing is the fact that people don't take responsibility for their decisions and actions. Not only that, but people are actually encouraged to not take any personal responsibility by people in power - politicians, psychiatrists, teachers, etc.

If everyone took their licks when they fucked up without crying about it or at least without blaming someone else for every little problem that happens to them, we'd all be much better off. And thing about all the regulations and agencies we have to "help" others or to "protect" others are actually counterproductive because it furthers the attitude that you don't have to be responsible for yourself, because see, there's always a crutch to lean on.

Does that help?

[Jason Ligon]

Akira,

I got the Viper that shot the missile, and then Raider that broke my heart when its twin missiles only moved slightly forward when you pushed the button. I wound up destroying the Cylon ship in a futile attempt to remove the safety.

Ahh, the memories ...

[Akira MacKenzie]

Ahh, the memories ...

That page has a lot of cool toys I remember as a kid. I had the StarBird and the StarBird Intruder. I used to love running around my back yard with those things pretending I was blasting aliens or something. I even had that StarBird base, but my mother wouldn't let me put it together on the grounds that she thought she could actually "laminate" it so it would never get ruined. Being both lazy and insane, she never got around to it. I think she eventually threw it out when I got "too old" for it.

My all time favorite toy was the large Mego (I think) Space 1999 Eagle Transport.

[Happy Jack]

Wow. I feel deprived. So many cool, deadly toys after my time.

Back in the day, we only played with sticks and dirt.

Fortunately, as a builder, I'm doing my part to dispose of those dangerous relics by cutting down trees and paving Paradise.

[kevrob]

Santa didn't bring me all the cool toys, either. I lusted after the Johnny 7 - OMA (One Man Army) rifle myself, but my brothers and I got something almost as good: toy rifles - I think they were called "Okinawa" rifles - that had a magazine built-in that carried 4-6 plastic orange rounds. Cock that sucker and you could hit cars in the street from the front porch.

After our first test firings, Mom immediately confiscated the ammo.

Levom

[mk]

I remember reading that John Waters collects all the toys that end up here. A fun hobby, I think.

http://www.toysafety.org/worstToyList_index.html

[ed]

Wimps. Best toy ever was a model car with real wheels that we strapped a rocket engine to. That sucker could move. And it came at you real fast.

[crimethink]

Did you know that dihydrogen monoxide is the primary component of acid rain?

Yeah! And did you know that significant quantities of DHMO are found in the bongs of heavy marijuana users?

[Stevo Darkly]

I'm a bit older than most of you guys, I think. The coolest toy I ever had was Major Matt Mason. Eventually the wire armature that made the astronaut poseable would break at the joints and sometimes protrude from the rubber body. I never heard of anybody getting scratched by the wires, but I bet they would keep the toy off the market if it was made today.

I also remember a spinoff from the Mattel "Hot Wheels" -- "Hot Birds." Little metal airplanes. You would attach a thin plastic line (fishing line, basically) to an object, then launch the planes from a special handheld platform. The planes would then "fly" along line and create a kind of "Wheeeeee" noise as they went.

I remember one time I attached the line to the handle of our family car that was parked in front of my parent's house, and launched planes from the front porch to the car. Unfortunately, my cousin Mike was riding a bike at the time, and he came zooming down the sidewalk at full speed, and didn't see the nearly invisible fishline strung across the sidewalk at the height of his neck. He said something like, "Gluckaaoww!" when the line neatly clotheslined his Adam's apple, broke, and wrapped itself around his neck. To this day, this incident has sparked many laughter-filled childhood reminiscences. For me, anyway. For my cousin Mike, maybe not as much.

Other great childhood toys:

- G.I. Joe Eye-Piercing Missile

- Ken and Barbie's Secret Cellar of Dark Pleasures

- Little Yakuza (tm) Finger Guillotine and Tattoo Kit

- Lucrezia Borgia Tea Set

[Stevo Darkly]

PS: Thinking upon it a bit more, it wasn't so much "Gluckaaoww!" as "Gwwwockkkkkk!"

[keith]

Maybe some parents should come with a warning label. "Not fit for use by children six and under." You know, I did dumb things as a kid, as all kids do, and the general reaction when I hurt myself was, "Well, I guess you learned not to do that again, didn't you?"

-K

[Lazlo]

Dead thread, I know. But for posterity's sake (and the catch-up-on-Saturday crowd) I'd like to point out that even if the Yo-Yo Water Ball has a design problem, its packaging certainly doesn't. If "Caution:To avoid the sharp matter & point" isn't a sufficient safety warning, I have no idea what would be.

[kwais]

following up on the knowledge that this is a dead thread. My favorite toys were breaking of a joint of the neighbors fence to make a sword.