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Will the Senate Do Carrots?

Tim Cavanaugh | 5.12.2005 4:38 PM

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John Bolton held hostage, Day 653: Senate Foreign Relations Committee votes 10-8 to send the anal-explosive public servant for a full Senate vote. Will he make the cut? Will it matter? Why hasn't he ever been seen together with Dr. Phibes? Which ten floors of the UN building will he cut out? Stay tuned.

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NEXT: John Walters' Suicide Fraud

Tim Cavanaugh
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  1. E. Steven   20 years ago

    Oh man, Dr. Phibes would be way cooler as ambassador to the UN. Especially if he whipped off that mask and showed his skull face to the general assembly!

  2. Smith   20 years ago

    When, oh when, is Larry Flynt's John Bolton sex club scandal, per Sploid, going to start waking waves?

  3. joe   20 years ago

    Orgy guys usually keep their 'staches neater than that, don't they?

    Bad day for right wingers with weird sex lives.

  4. The Real Bill   20 years ago

    At the risk of repeating myself, I must say that if government can't be good, it might as well be entertaining. I hope Bolton is nominated and hijinks at the UN ensue. He reminds me a bit of Yosemite Sam. Loony Toons for the loony UN.

  5. Happy Jack   20 years ago

    No, it won't matter.

    More importantly, why was Dr. Phibes so pissed off? It seems he was doing quite well. Vulnavia was hot and kept her mouth shut. What more could you want, besides world domination?

  6. Douglas Fletcher   20 years ago

    Is it just me or does Dr. Phibes look a lot like John Kerry?

  7. Anonymous   20 years ago

    John Bolton held hostage, Day 653: Senate Foreign Relations Committee votes 10-8 to send the anal-explosive public servant for a full Senate vote.

    Hey now, no need to make public Mr Bolton's flatulence problem. So he farts on subordinates and the UN heiarchy, whats the big deal? He's just naturally responding to years of his older brothers' tormenting him.

  8. Rick Barton   20 years ago

    Bolton's attitude toward the UN is one of his only
    redeeming qualities vis a vis a government job.

  9. McClain   20 years ago

    Gotta love Bush's knack for theater: nobody knew who this Bolton guy was a few months ago. Now he's the AntiChrist of the U.N.
    It always SEEMS like sheer dumb luck everytime Bush judo-flips the Democrats, but he pulls it off time and time again.
    The U.N. functionaries won't be saying "So - who's this Bolton guy?"
    They'll be, like, "Oh shit! Those fucking asshole Americans actually sent that fucking asshole Bolton to represent them!? Damn, son, that's cold...."

  10. Mike H.   20 years ago

    Helicopters... UN helicopters!

  11. joe   20 years ago

    I don't know if it applies in this case, McClain, but I've often wondered whether "dissident" American political figures who attract howling right wing outrage are actually in on a good cop/bad cop game.

    "Listen, Slobodan/Leonid/Kim, this guy's CRAZY!"

  12. McClain   20 years ago

    Hope you're right about that, Joe!

  13. rob   20 years ago

    McClain - Yeah, it's the ONLY reason I can see for actually submitting the guy. I often think that was the UN & specifically European reaction when Bush got re-elected. Kinda like they did with Reagan - that whole "they really ELECTED that insane cowboy??? Twice?!?" It never fails to get a chuckle from me...

  14. McClain   20 years ago

    😉

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