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:)

Jesse Walker | 4.26.2005 3:11 PM

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The John Bolton affair is explained with emoticons.

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NEXT: Flattening Friedman

Jesse Walker is books editor at Reason and the author of Rebels on the Air and The United States of Paranoia.

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  1. Jim Walsh   20 years ago

    This is very funny. My favorite is the forehead-slapping "D'oh" emoticon.

  2. Anon   20 years ago

    I wanted with every fiber of my being not to like this.

    Anon

  3. Rick Barton   20 years ago

    Bolton 🙁

    The UN 🙁

    Individual liberty 🙂 🙂

  4. Ellie   20 years ago

    Love it.

  5. Ken Shultz   20 years ago

    I wanted to convey the story of the Abu Gharib tragedy by way of hamster dancers, but who has the time?

  6. SPD   20 years ago

    Truly, this is the 21st century.

  7. David   20 years ago

    They needed a moustachoed emoticon :{)

  8. panurge   20 years ago

    Terrific piece. Makes you wonder what this guy could have done with a story on the Lewinsky scandal...

    As for Bolton, my support has waned as well. We NEED someone tough at the UN, someone who can help reorganize and bring some dignity back to the organization, but the more I hear about his conflicts with Colin Powell and his hand grenade-like use of office supplies, the more hesitant I become.

    A GOP senator I generally respect, Chuck Hagel, has expressed discontent. I guess I could live with him as UN ambassador (who knows, maybe he will knock those guys back into line), but you think Condi and George could have come up with someone a little more... diplomatic?

  9. R C Dean   20 years ago

    panurge, I think your basic disconnect over Bolton has do with not realizing that bitch-slapping subordinates and submarining Colin Powell are actually reasons to believe that Bolton is just the guy to get tough with the UN and start some reforms rolling.

    The joint is chock full of diplomats, one more is going to make about as much difference as another lobbyist on K Street. The old definition of insanity applies to international affairs, you know. If you just keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same results.

  10. panurge   20 years ago

    R C Dean-

    You have a good point. But will the UN diplomats react with scorn and just ignore anything he says?

    I do not want a suck-up or pushover to go to the UN. I just want someone who can outsmart rather than outshout.

  11. panurge   20 years ago

    Another note- bear in mind that one of the most damning testimonies against him came from a fellow conservative Republican who agrees that the UN needs to be reformed.

  12. Jason Ligon   20 years ago

    Ken,

    Not hamsters, squirrels. Don't compromise on the talent, man!

  13. Brad LeVeck   20 years ago

    R C Dean, could you tell me in specific terms what the Bush admin is trying to do in the UN right now that it can't do, but could do if it had someone there who was a little bit meaner?

  14. Dan   20 years ago

    bear in mind that one of the most damning testimonies against him came from a fellow conservative Republican who agrees that the UN needs to be reformed

    Who are you referring to?

  15. J. Goard   20 years ago

    Those aren't emoticons; they're rich iconic graphics or something else, but I object to their being confused with the important linguistic function of your standard :), :-), ;-), or my preferred :->. :->

  16. Lazlo Nibble   20 years ago

    The Bolton affair might be more accurately conveyed by the SA Forums emoticon set.

    Actually you could do the whole thing with just :tinfoil:, :raise:, :nyd: and :byewhore:.

  17. panurge   20 years ago

    Dan-

    I don't remember his name, but he was the bearded guy who made the phrase "kiss up, kick down" famous.

  18. Dan   20 years ago

    Carl Ford?

    I admit that I haven't been following the testimony (since I rate the importance of UN Ambassador somewhere between the White House wine steward and the guy who parks Dick Cheney's car) but I had gotten the impression that there had been accusations considerably more serious than "he treats his underlings like shit". Is that really the "most damning testimony" that was heard -- that he abuses underlings?

  19. Herve Hamster   20 years ago

    ^_^

    Who says squirrels have more talent than hamsters?! Talent my ass! You take that back, ya hear? Lest I be crawling up your special place when you least expect it....

  20. panurge   20 years ago

    Dan-

    I said "one of" the most damning. There is clearly some worse stuff out there, most likely whatever Colin Powell is whispering into Hagel, Chafee, and Voinivich's ears.

  21. joe   20 years ago

    Dan,

    There are the illegal intercepts of NSA cables, about which the White House is stonewalling Lugar's committee; and there is the dissemination of known/should have been known bogus intel about the alleged Cuban offensive bioweapons program.

    On top the inability to behave like a professional.

  22. Dan   20 years ago

    There is clearly some worse stuff out there, most likely whatever Colin Powell is whispering into Hagel, Chafee, and Voinivich's ears

    "Here's a chance to be on TV"? 🙂

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