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It's All Over But the Banging of the Shoe

Matt Welch | 12.3.2004 4:02 PM

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Christmas may be coming early for Cold War nostalgiacs. I still hope the Russians love their children too.

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NEXT: I've Seen the Future

Matt Welch is an editor at large at Reason.

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  1. db   21 years ago

    "Even if dictatorship is packaged in beautiful pseudo-democratic phraseology, it will not be able to solve systemic problems," Putin said. "It may even make them worse."

    Are you sure this wasn't said about Putin, rather than by him?

  2. Tator   21 years ago

    Dick calls Penis white.

  3. Dan   21 years ago

    Are you sure this wasn't said about Putin, rather than by him?

    Yeah, seriously. Was there a camera on Putin when he said that? Did he manage to keep a straight face?

  4. Brian   21 years ago

    I figured restarting the Cold War with Russia would probably be the crowning achievement of the Bush administration.

    Yeah, I know, it takes two to tango - if Putin wasn't a tyrant at heart they couldn't restart it even if they wanted to.

  5. Mo   21 years ago

    Alterna-headlines:
    Pot Calls Kettle Black
    Irony Defined

    I really dislike Bush and his Iraq policy, but Putin has less than zero room to talk. Last I checked Bush wasn?t helping to rig elections in the Philippines (closest analog to Ukraine vis-a-vis former status) or suspending democracy at home.

    Proving once again, nothing will get an administration support of their domestic enemies like being called a tyrant by foreign tyrants.

    What?s next, the Ayatollah or a Saudi prince calling Bush a religious extremist?

  6. Brian   21 years ago

    The problem is when dealing with a country with nukes, you need a reality-based foreign policy.

    Rather than think too much about that, I think I'll have a beer.

  7. Adam   21 years ago

    In somewhat less dramatic Putin news, the Times of India is reporting that his security team cleans his silverware with vodka.

  8. Stevo Darkly   21 years ago

    I've got it! I've got it! The perfect headline for the Putin article!

    Ex-Red Tinpot Calls Cattleman Black

    (By the way, whoever writes the various headlines for REASON is exceptionally clever and good.)

    (I once saw a movie magazine do an article about The Day After Tomorrow titled "Icy Dead People" -- that wasn't bad either.)

  9. Tim Cavanaugh   21 years ago

    Excellent, excellent, excellent work, Stevo. I'm afraid we're all still fleas in the armpit of the NY Post headline writer who ran the famous picture of the smoking Marine with the headline "Marlboro Men Kick Butt In Fallujah." The Post headlines have declined drastically over the past 20 years, but once in a while they still come up with a pearl richer than all our tribe.

  10. Twba   21 years ago

    "Headless Body In Topless Bar" was another good NY Post headline.

  11. Eric II   21 years ago

    Seeing that he was in New Delhi at the time, I wonder if this story has something to do with Putin's PMS-like ire:

    NEW DELHI - US President George W Bush's first tenure was good for India, and Bush II promises to be even better, with the United States formally offering a range of military hardware, including an anti-missile radar system and maritime spy planes, to India. The offer includes the much-touted Patriot anti-missile defense system that tackles aircraft and also tactical and cruise missiles, C-130 stretched medium-lift transport aircraft, P-3C Orion maritime surveillance planes, and even F-16 fighters. The US has also offered Perry-class frigates and Sea Hawk helicopters, while special-operations forces will be looking at chemical and biological protection equipment.

    Between the shifting winds of the Ukraine saga and what might be the final nail in the coffin to India's status as a Soviet-Russian client state, this clearly wasn't Putin's best week from a Cold War revivalist standpoint. A few more like this and all he'll have left is Kaliningrad and the occassional Eisenstein film festival.

  12. joe   21 years ago

    Totally off topic, what's Stalingrad called these days?

  13. Tim Cavanaugh   21 years ago

    Volgograd.

  14. Stevo Darkly   21 years ago

    Ithaca, New York.

  15. Penisgrabed   21 years ago

    joe and Tim,
    You are playing with us.

  16. David Moynihan   21 years ago

    Speaking of 'lines -- from yahoo! fanball

    Giants: Hand pulls groin

  17. Yo   21 years ago

    Thank you, David.

  18. Akira MacKenzie   21 years ago

    GAH! Thanks Matt! Now I'll have that f---king Sting song in my head ALL DAY!

  19. Stevo Darkly   21 years ago

    Tim Cavanaugh -- Thank you very much, I consider that high praise indeed from a member of REASON's staff. I'm not too familiar with the NY Post (aside from the "Headless Body Found in Topless Bar" classic noted by Twba), but I think you guys hold your own. (That was not intended to be one of the hand/groin comments, although I enjoyed David M's post.)

  20. Gary Gunnels   21 years ago

    Eric II,

    Are they sure they want a Patriot II missile system? It might bring down their shiny new C-130. Of course the U.S. might be selling it so as to knock down some of the new Mirage fighters France has sold India.

  21. Eric II   21 years ago

    "Are they sure they want a Patriot II missile system? It might bring down their shiny new C-130."

    Yeah, I've heard about the accuracy issues as well. But the article doesn't state which version of the Patriot is being offered. If past reports have any value, it's the supposedly more accurate (but shorter-range) PAC-3 that's likely to be offered.

    The F-16 offer, if true, would be interesting. Whereas Orions and C-130s have been offered to Pakistan for a while, it looks like Musharraf was shot down once again last week in his attempt to procure new F-16s.

  22. Jason Ligon   21 years ago

    "Are they sure they want a Patriot II missile system? It might bring down their shiny new C-130. Of course the U.S. might be selling it so as to knock down some of the new Mirage fighters France has sold India."

    What is up with the Mirage revival these days? The Chinese have apparently scrapped their knock off Flanker project due to engineering issues and have bought a boat load of Mirages to fill the gap temporarily.

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