Mao's Little Red Video Guide

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Is there any website more entertaining than the Maoist International Movement's collection of movie reviews? Some excerpts:

On Patch Adams: "All through the film we were quietly rooting for Patch to take his struggle to the masses. And in the final tribunal scene he does. Over the loud objections of the tribunal, Patch Adams turns his back on the doctors passing judgment to speak to the medical students in the balcony. Regardless of the outcome of the tribunal, Patch calls on the next generation of doctors, the medical students, to serve the people."

On Men in Black II: "Being a sequel, MIBII operates within the framework of the original reactionary premise; nonetheless, important new elements do arise within MIBII. The movie opens with a space alien deciding to take the form of a 'Victoria Secret' model."

On That Obscure Object of Desire: "For MIM, the film is realistic but dangerously subtle."

On the anti-Cultural Revolution film The Blue Kite: "One of the brothers in the family is clearly a Rightist by all that he says and does, and he is sent off to a rectification camp where he seems to learn some things."

On Spider-Man: "Ironically, it was the romantic plot that provided the most important political message in the movie. When the woman Peter Parker was in love with finally declared her love for him, he decided he could not be more than friends with her. In order to devote his life to fighting evil in the world he walked away from romance. This is the asexuality that MIM praises as a superior romantic practice. It reflects a devotion to the people and an understanding of responsibility to the people that supersedes romantic cultural influence."

The site welcomes freelance submissions from the masses, and includes guidelines for would-be reviewers. Be forewarned, though: Writing these pieces is a grave responsibility. "When MIM disapproves of a movie or song today, even in today's politically backward conditions, it means that that work is especially backward and will only look more so if the political situation advances enough to put MIM in power. Hence, when we disapprove of something we mean to ban it upon seizure of state power. Reviewers should keep that in mind and avoid a strictly academic or review-for-its-own-sake approach."

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  1. Sheesh… I knew Hollywood has left-leaning tendencies, but this is reading a little too much into it.

  2. Jonah Goldberg will never be able to watch “Spider-Man” again.

  3. I can’t believe they completely misinterpreted Spider-Man so badly. Peter Parker did not give up on Mary Jane’s love solely for his love of others. He gave up for purely selfish reasons. He saw what happened when one of his enemies, the Green Goblin, learned of his love for Mary Jane. If that ever happened again, it would emotionally destroy him.

    It shows his love for Mary Jane is so deep, that he’d rather not have her, if it meant she had a better chance of living. This would decrease the chance that she would be taken hostage by another maniacal villain. Which would also decrease her chances of death.

  4. I am not sure who actually is in charge of MIM, but I am pretty sure they never get laid…
    Seriously, I am astounded that such an organization exists, and attracts followers. If you really want a laugh, read their blurb justifying their desire to practice complete control of the media. How can it be that people are still espousing a philosophy that in all forms it has been attempted, has failed utterly and completely. Someone should also tell them that sometimes a movie is just a movie.

  5. Ah, yes!

    Black people to love you, oh blackpeopleloveus.com. At least the ones I’ve mentioned you to. The most common response is “I have got to see that!”, especially after I mention how nice it is you (Johnny) take the time to praise your black friend who is so “articulate”. Heh…

  6. On the MIM site, I especially like the
    irony of seeing:

    Buy it!The Matrix – Standard Collector’s Edition Buy The Matrix DVD

    Who knew? That’s an entirely different
    interpretation of “the workers control the
    means of production”

  7. EMAIL: nospam@nospampreteen-sex.info
    IP: 196.40.75.69
    URL: http://preteen-sex.info
    DATE: 05/21/2004 12:28:01
    After two years in Washington, I often long for the realism and sincerity of Hollywood.

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