Law Lets Cops Jail People for Sleeping in Cars! (Nanny of the Month, Aug ‘13)

This month’s lineup features Iranian officials who deemed a woman too sexy to hold office, a certain big-city mayor (take a wild guess!) who’s bent on banning e-cigarettes, even though they’ve helped plenty of people kick cancer sticks.

But for this month’s top dishonors we head to the ritzy Bay Area city of Palo Alto.

Renting a one-bedroom apartment will run you about $2,500 a month, and the city council has recently criminalized the much cheaper option of sleeping in your car. Tough economic times get a lot tougher for car dwellers who don’t just have to worry about finding jobs and housing, but also avoiding arrest and hard time (up to a year in jail!).

But not to worry, says Palo Alto Mayor Gregory Scharff. The new ordinance merely provides police with a much-needed “tool” to punish those who do awful things like urinate and defecate on people’s yards. (As if such offenses aren’t already against the law!)

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“Nanny of the Month” is written and produced by Ted Balaker (@tedbalaker). Researcher is Matt Edwards (@mattchrised). Opening motion graphics by Meredith Bragg.

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  • sarcasmic||

    How do you get rid of homelessness? Make it illegal.

  • lizalisa12||

    til I saw the bank draft which was of $6392, I be certain ...that...my friend could realey earning money part time from there labtop.. there neighbour haz done this 4 less than 21 months and by now repayed the loans on their mini mansion and bourt a top of the range Mazda. more tips here ------ Click Here for More Details

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  • Knarf Yenrab (prev. An0nB0t)||

    Turns out that public property isn't public at all, but owned and controlled by the state. Who would've guessed?

  • Cdr Lytton||

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    "But the mayor defends the ordinance, saying it provides police with a much-needed crime-fighting tool."

    Inventing a new crime is considered a crime-fighting tool.

  • Gorilla tactics||

    yeah we all know how crime ridden palo alto is, it's like the mogadishu of the west coast. Constant drive bys

  • John||

    Just a guess, but I don't think there are many uncaring monocle wearing libertarians running around Palo Alto. It is full of caring liberals who are apparently totally happy with sending poor people to jail to make sure they stay out of sight.

  • Doctor Whom||

    A friend of mine from undergrad lives there. It seems from listening to him that Palo Alto is full of rich, suburban caring liberals, i.e., raging hypocrites who are caring liberals when caring and liberalism suit them.

  • John||

    I tagged along with my wife to a conference there a few years ago. It is gorgeous and incredibly wealthy. Lots of Priuses parked next to Range Rovers in front of very large houses. It is a F5 smug storm there pretty much every day.

  • plusafdotcom||

    When I was living in "East Cupertino," (the slummy section...) I used to like to go to some of the coffee shops and movies in Palo Alto.

    With no parking available and traffic signals set to impede flow, I concluded that PA just doesn't like visitors, so I stopped going there.

    Must have made them very happy.

  • Gorilla tactics||

    But that's how liberalism works.

    Lefties view high taxes and regulations the same way late medieval catholics viewed indulgences. By embracing the tyrannical state and paying ridiculous taxes (Palo Alto ain't cheap), the left buys its way out of guilt and they thus absolve themselves to be complete pricks when it comes to helping people voluntarily.

    Remember that heat wave in France? 10 000 died, the most caring, benevolent french state couldn't handle the volume-but the french were on vacay and couldn't be bothered to bury their loved ones. Why? because by buying into statism they outsourced their moral agency to the state. C'est pas mon probleme.

  • sasob||

    In the meantime, while you're sitting in jail, your car gets towed and impounded. By the time you get out of jail, the storage fees will have become so high that you can kiss your car goodbye. Then the car gets sold at public auction and somebody picks up a sweet deal. Nice country we live in. Nice people running it. Someone ought to take a healthy dump on that mayor's doorstep.

  • Matrix||

    healthy dump? I hope it's bloody diarrhea

  • Matrix||

    In fact, we have a guy in this office we call "Splatter Ass"... routinely paints the back of the toilets with his shit. Don't know what he's eating or how he does it. And we avoid those toilets until they are cleaned.

    He would be perfect for this job.

  • sarcasmic||

    Lactose intolerance ain't fun. It causes so much gas to build up that the only way for it to get out is to push everything out of the way. Which means emptying the large intestine before it has finished absorbing water from the shit. The result: gas propelled diarrhea.

  • Matrix||

    Well, then he should stay away from foods that cause him to do that shit. Or at least clean up his fucking mess!

  • sarcasmic||

    Ask around for who might be lactose intolerant without mentioning why. Then shame him.

  • Jordan||

    Someone ought to take a healthy dump on that mayor's doorstep.

    Paging Sandi!

  • Aluhaii||

    I'm still laughing over all above comments re. Splatter Ass. Funny, funny, funny!!

  • Raston Bot||

    The stay at home spouses of Stanford administrators and Silicon Valley executives make for shitty neighbors. The people harassed by this ordinance are probably the same who handle their food and raise their kids.

  • mr simple||

    I worked construction on new housing in affluent developments. Once there was a dog that had gotten loose from somewhere in the neighborhood and decided to hang out in the construction site, so one of my co-workers called the number on its tag to let the owners know where it was. A man called back and asked how late we were going to be there so he could pick it up after work because his wife was too scared of the hispanic bricklayers to come down and pick it up herself.

  • Gorilla tactics||

    but never forget, liberals can not be racists. Never forget that...never ever forget that. That woman was almost as racist as the word Chicago.

  • IceTrey||

    Why are these people staying in one of the most expensive cities in the country? They have cars, drive to somewhere cheaper. Sheesh.

  • Gorilla tactics||

    ugh

    man, I dunno whats wrong with me, I love the nanny of the month segments on reason, but after watching them I always get so fucking pissed off. That Palo Alto case is just fucking disgusting, the mayor's argument was such a bullshit evasion. Typical liberal hypocrisy right there, nimbyism at work. What's the expression? the left loves humanity but hates people? fuck me.

  • DH||

    "the left loves humanity but hates people"

    Well at least poor people.

    Here's some nice reading material.

    http://paloalto.opendata.junar.....-salaries/

  • Gorilla tactics||

    I wish I could tell you this shocked me. How long do you think it will take california to connect the dots between 6 figure salaries for public employees and the fact that they're going bankrupt?

    That and the Choo Choo train-man politicians fucking love choo choo trains. The whole thing is quite mind blowing really. We are always told it's those EVUL KORPORASHUNS that are fucking people over, but when people see those bullshit salaries you posted nobody bats a fucking eye.

  • DH||

    Da, Komrad. Evil kapitalist pig korporations destroy glorious United Soviet States.

  • Latanya1RPowell||

    my Aunty Mackenzie just got a nice six-month old Mercedes-Benz S-Class Sedan by working part-time from a macbook. official website www.work25.com

  • Alan||

    Most places, the cops tell drivers that if they are sleepy they should pull over and stop, and get some rest before continuing to drive.

    I presume that any sleep-deprived driver in Palo Alto will now be able to shift responsibility for any accident over to the local government.

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