Tonight on The Independents: Confessions of an FCC Commissioner, Woman Forced to Live on the Grid, Appreciation of Harold Ramis, Plus Alec Baldwin, Army Shrinkage, Jason Collins, Taco Waffles, El Chapo, Racism Penalties, and After-Show

The Olympics are over, kids (so is would-be 9 o'clock rival Piers Morgan, shhhh!!!), so it's time to get serious about your viewing, commenting, sharing, and recommending of The Independents on Fox Business Network.

Tonight's live at 9 pm ET, 6 pm PT (with repeats three hours later), features indie filmmaker and all-around hooligan Gavin McInnes teaming up with comedian Sherrod Small to provide panelisty goodness on the following topics: Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel proposing to shrink the Army down to pre-1941 levels, journeyman center Jason Collins becoming the first openly gay athlete to play in one of America's four major professional sports, the advent of the three-way embryo, the arrest of Joaquín "El Chapo" Guzmán, the public implosion of Alec Baldwin, and the NFL's proposed 15-yard penalty for using the N-word on the playing field.

Former Federal Communications Commissioner Robert McDowell will be on to talk about the FCC's now-cancelled newsroom study, and hopefully also the latest goings on with Netflix. We will also talk to freedom fighter Robin Speronis, who has been told by Cape Coral, Florida authorities that she has one month to plug into the grid, or else face consequences. The Topical Storm segment may or may not include the dreaded taco waffle, the Royal Family's secret veto power, and milk propaganda.

Send your tweets to @IndependentsFBN throughout, hashtag 'em #indFBN, and remember to stay tuned for the sexy online-only after show, streamed on the show website a tick or two after 10 pm.

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  • ||

    Tonight on The Independents: Confessions of an FCC Commissioner, Woman Forced to Live on the Grid, Appreciation of Harold Ramis, Plus Alec Baldwin, Army Shrinkage, Jason Collins, Taco Waffles, El Chapo, Racism Penalties, After-Show, and

    And what? Spit it out you mush-mouthed prick!

  • playa manhattan||

    You watch TD episode 6 yet?

  • ||

    Yeah, last night. Clearly the episode was intended to provide filler and set up the last two episodes and it did it very well.

    Not sure how Woody Harrelson's character manages to attract nubile, top-quality tail but I guess there really are girls out there that go for asshole cops.

  • playa manhattan||

    Lot of filler. My wife predicted the reason for their falling out. I can't wait for her reaction to the "put it in my ass" phone call.

  • ||

    Yeah, interesting juxtaposition between the porn-quality sex scene between Marty and that girl and the utterly de-eroticized coupling between Cohle and Maggie.

  • playa manhattan||

    You do get to see her body double's thong....

  • ||

    Pretty sure that was actually McConaughey's ass, so there's a first for an HBO show: the lead is more naked in a sex scene than the girl he's screwing.

  • playa manhattan||

    The part where her dress comes up. I am now very suspicious of you.

  • ||

    No, I know what you mean. We catch a glimpse of someone's but in a thong.

    But I'm saying there was a longer shot after that of bareassed McConaughey and that's gotten more buzz.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    but I guess there really are girls out there that go for asshole cops.

    Morgan Fairchild

  • seguin||

    good boobs hth

  • ||

    Well...it's a TV show.

  • playa manhattan||

    An HBO tv show. Now with 1000 percent more butt sex!!!

  • ||

    Like there's another kind.

  • ||

    Swergen, cocksucka!

  • ||

    Swergen, cocksucka!

    Wait, what?

  • Dances-with-Trolls||

    In Deadwood it's 7 dollars for an assfuck.

  • Bam!||

    Calling the after show "streamed" is a bit of an exaggeration. I'd call it "spurted."

  • SweatingGin||

    I got dizzy reading the topics.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    BE WARNED EVERYONE: They film a bunch of these all on the same day. It's all a sham. One live show after a slew they record, that's my guess. Why, it's no better than The Price is Right.

  • playa manhattan||

    If you can't have the first post, you feel the need to have the most important one?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    It is an important post. It's very important. People need to know what they're dealing with here.

  • SweatingGin||

    What this show really needs is an introduction from the price is right announcer, and "Matt Welch! Come on down!" introductions, complete with the flashing monochrome graphics overlaying the screen.

  • Matt Welch||

    Mondays and Tuesdays are always live. Wednesdays are sometimes live, sometimes pre-taped on Wednesday afternoon. Friday shows, being arranged around a theme, are typically shot on Tuesdays.

  • playa manhattan||

    A hoax generates over 45,000 internet news stories:
    http://variety.com/2014/scene/.....201119170/

    Does any "journalist" do his own research anymore?

  • croaker||

    They don't have time to do research. Get it out first.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "Exiled Nigerian Prince seeks support in regaining throne"

    "So, Mr. Jablome, what is your opinion on the national debt?"

    "Bob, I'm here in the Amazon waiting for the elusive snipe..."

  • John C. Randolph||

    The appalling thing is that any "journalist" thinks that the present-day Lief Garret is news.

    -jcr

  • VG Zaytsev||

    I've toyed with the idea of a starting a non-profit whose mission is discredit the mainstream media by planting and then exposing the reporting of fake stories.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    I scarcely have any time to do any useful trolling, but I'll just lay this on ya.

    "These "Religious Freedom" Bills Are the New Stand-Your-Ground Laws"

    (hint: that title isn't meant as a compliment)

    "Furthermore, SYG defenses are shockingly successful. Seventy percent of people who have invoked the defense have avoided prosecution....

    "What does this all mean for bills like SB1062? Granting people the legal right to invoke religious beliefs to justify their right to refuse service will embolden many people who might have otherwise been afraid to do so. Moreover, the defense could end up being a largely successful one."

    http://www.newrepublic.com/art.....nt=4052661

  • PapayaSF||

    So freedom of religious association might become as shockingly successful as self-defense? Oh noes, what will become of the country??

  • Paul.||

    Bible thumping bitter clingers shooting all who approach.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    INDEPENDENTS ASSEMBLE!

  • playa manhattan||

    There you are. Any reason a 4 ship of F18s would be flying over Palm Springs yesterday? Closest field would be 29 Palms or March ARB, but IDK if they have anything to do with Navy.

    Either way, my kids were pretty excited. A pretty low pass for a resort area...

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Marines fly them too. Could be doing exercises at 29 Palms, but who knows.

  • playa manhattan||

    It was cool. And looked really expensive.

  • Timon 19||

    Either on their way from Red Flag 14-1 or to Red Flag 14-2 at Nellis (Vegas).

  • ||

  • Rufus J. Firefly||

    /zips pants.

    Wassup?

  • Rufus J. Firefly||

    Which left-winger needs to be capture and/or captured, boss?

  • Rufus J. Firefly||

    Shit, mangled that one.

    Which left-winger needs to be captured and/or killed?

  • SweatingGin||

    Black bag operation? We doing some wet work? I want playa in on it, he's reliable. Not Episiarch -- the last time we did this, he got all "cutty" on the hostage.

  • playa manhattan||

    I'm reliable in that a month after the hit, I'll show up with a tan, beard, and blond hair, and want to know what I missed.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Hoops again. Sharks might as well jump through them.

  • ||

    Extra-large hoops? If you want to be boring, Kennedy...

  • Bam!||

    Lengthy intro.

  • ||

    That was one odyssey of an introduction.

  • Bam!||

    AGH! A hipster!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The narrower the tie, the fatter you look, gentlemen.

  • ||

    Did Matt and Kmele take GIMORE's fashion advice?!?

  • ||

    I see they invited Mr. Plaid to make Matt feel less dorky.

  • SweatingGin||

    He's no Don Cherry, though.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Well, now we know. This one was filmed on a Wednesday.

  • ||

    Uh, the Army is way too big.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    So the military isn't a jobs program then?

  • ||

    To the everlasting glory of the infantry, lives the story of Private Rodger Young.

    Would the Army size increase or decrease if we invented Mobile Infantry battle suits?

  • ||

    Increase, obviously, since everyone would join to get their hands on a suit.

  • SweatingGin||

    "These army bases, they do support a lot of towns in American"

    And Germany!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    More Navy! You're gonna need a bigger boat!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I'm getting a contact high from this episode.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Foster thinks we should outsource our dog fighting to China.

  • ||

    I can't tell whether Matt or Kmele looks more like a Secret Service agent. Is that really what you guys were going for?

  • ||

    So how long until the first intersex, trans, black dolphin hybrid breaks historical barriers by playing in a professional sports league?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I CAN'T QUIT THIS STORY.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Who cares? Gay is so 2013.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Pillow munching joke. Enjoy your letters.

  • ||

    Oh great, now the Jets are the gayest team and that's after Mark Sanchez got benched. They just can't win, can they?

  • Bam!||

    Always Be Cursing.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Positive public image is for closers.

  • ||

    Do you see this fucking watch?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "Nuts?"

    "Nice?"

    "Newton?"

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Kennedy is two for two derailing her fellow panelists' points so far tonight.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    That LegalZoom ad has at least one baker.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "Nurse?"

    "Nervous Nellie?"

  • SweatingGin||

    Streaming the show to avoid mother-in-law, so missing the commercials. However will I know which boner pill is right when I move my small business to New York for a temporary tax break!??

  • playa manhattan||

    He called Maddow fake, so there's that.

  • ||

    Did Kennedy just say "take a Shatner"?

  • mr lizard||

    Anti-nut-punch OT. PIERCE MORGAN SHIT CANNED

    http://entertainment.time.com/.....-a-reason/

  • SweatingGin||

    It's on topic, it's even in the first paragraph. Kennedy had it in the introduction.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    If you will direct your gaze to the title of this post...

  • Ted S.||

    Why do you want him to direct his Male Gaze as Kennedy?

  • Ted S.||

    That should be "at", not "as".

  • Paul.||

    I don't have any gaze... at least I don't have any handy.

  • SweatingGin||

    "Pickle Kissers"

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Whoda thunk I have something in common with Awek Bawdwin?

  • playa manhattan||

    He made 20-30 percent sense in his "final" american interview.

  • SweatingGin||

    Seems like being a good progressive carried him spouting off for a long time. Until it didn't. Then they came down on him hard.

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    Seems like being a good progressive carried him spouting off for a long time. Until it didn't. Then they came down on him hard.

    His article made for interesting reading. His main chagrin seems to be that the media and left-wing interest groups were more than happy to enable his temper tantrums when he directed them at right-wingers. If a conservative or libertarian celeb had left that kind of message to their daughter that he did, they'd be a permanent object of mockery. Baldwin kept his job and the whole thing was kind of brushed off. (Incidentally, he's discussed parental alienation before and I think he brings up some good points in that regard)

    The minute he directed all that anger at a protected group, those same people set out to destroy him. You can tell he wants to publicly make the connection on left-wing hypocrisy in this regard, but values his position in the industry too much to burn that bridge forever. Unlike the Robertsons, he doesn't have "fuck you" money from before he became famous.

  • PapayaSF||

    It was interesting and generated some sympathy from me, but he spoiled it by claiming the left picked up the hate habit from Fox News and Breitbart. Yeah, like the left was always so kind and polite before then.

  • playa manhattan||

    I'll admit that I was sympathetic at times, if he was telling the truth. Problem is, he is a pathological liar. So I don't lose any sleep over it.

    I don't think I have ever heard anyone yell the term "Cocksucking Fat Head" in anger, but I have heard people yell something similar. If he would just tell the truth, he would be more sympathetic. But instead, he is just insulting the intelligence of anyone who will listen with the "Fat Head" nonsense.

  • Red Rocks Rockin||

    To be clear, I don't have much sympathy for him, either. Contrary to his Irish Catholic "woe is me" act, he's had a pretty terrific career and is an excellent actor. His "Glengarry" bit is, for my money, the single greatest movie scene of the last 30 years.

    But he's also a tremendous ass who's gotten away with being a personally nasty shit up until now because of his political inclinations. He doesn't want to say it, but his article is a cautionary tale of what happens today when a person engages in wrongthink or wrongtalk--there's a lot of petty, miserable people looking to ruin your life in the most public manner possible, especially if you already have a reputation for being an asshole.

  • SweatingGin||

    I gotta say, I do really like the guy from Taki mag. Just the right mix of insanity and calling Maddow a communist.

  • playa manhattan||

    If he were at my local bar, I would pick up his tab.

  • SweatingGin||

    Something tells me it would be a large tab. Not Moynihan large, but large.

  • ||

  • sticks||

    He was the guy that quit pot for like 10 years then decides to take a huge bong hit of top shelf to prove that pot is not safe. Fuck that guy.

  • SweatingGin||

    Really? I remember that article -- I thought Taki was more counter-culture than that, though. Huh. Time to go searching.

    Drink offer: provisionally rescinded.

  • PapayaSF||

    Taki is counter-cultural in the sense of being un-PC, and some variety of neoreactionary and/or paleocon. He's not a doctrinaire libertarian, though there is some overlap.

    I don't agree with him on pot, but Gavin is a funny and amusing iconoclastic neoreactionary, even if skewers some of your icons.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    "Notorious?"

    "Nietzsche?"

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    It's virtual slavery.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    The British control the league?

  • ||

    This show would be way better if everyone were as drunk as the Takimag guy and Kmele.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Kennedy lost control.

  • Bam!||

    I imagine the going off the grid story is going to be like when Kramer tried to cancel his mail.

  • Derpetologist||

    We all know the military will never be cut, but wouldn't it be great if the money was redirected to whimsical, anachronistic weapons?

    I demand an air armada of zeppelins armed with tesla cannons! And uniforms with those Cap'n Crunch shoulder thingies!

  • ||

    I demand an air armada of zeppelins armed with tesla cannons! And uniforms with those Cap'n Crunch shoulder thingies!

    Epaulettes?

    I agree, more zeppelins and dirigibles and whatnot.

  • sticks||

    Wait. Matt really didn'[t know tranny is offensive?

  • ||

    I'm still amused at how they put up a giant screen to cover Kennedy's legs after the first few shows.

  • ||

    HOLY CHRIST THIS MCDOWELL GUY IS CREEPY

  • kibby||

    That's rich, coming from the likes of you.

  • ||

    You're late.

  • kibby||

    I was watching you guys bomb in this thread.

  • SweatingGin||

    Early trial of the "Romney Treatment"

  • ||

    This guy is like the used car salesmen for used car salesmen.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    McDowell backs slowly away from the scandal.

  • ||

    I'm out of my preferred gin and my limes are rock-like. The baby Jesus does not want me having a delicious G&T tonight.

  • SweatingGin||

    Hendricks?

    Beefeater 24, for me.

  • ||

    Indeed. Luckily my backup is St. George Terroir, which makes for a delicious G&T.

    I'll put the Crater Lake Epi referenced on my to drink list.

  • SweatingGin||

    I've got some St. George Absinthe. Quite liked. it's a close second to one of the swiss ones I got.

  • ||

    I saw that. I wasn't willing to invest without a recommendation.

  • SweatingGin||

    It's just fine absinthe. I'dI'll probably buy it again. I bought it two years ago, and only just opened it this winter. It's turned a little brown (like they do) but still tastes fine, and is still green in the glass.

    Store it on it's side, my cork dried out.

  • ||

    You're out of Crater Lake, jesse?

  • SweatingGin||

    May pay bitcoin for someone on the west coast to ship me crater lake.

  • ||

    What's funny is that now if a restaurant doesn't have it I get huffy and order a beer instead. Of course, outside of Seattle and Portland I can't find it anywhere (not even in Vancouver).

  • SweatingGin||

    a friend brought a bottle back for me from Portland, quite enjoyed it.

  • kibby||

    Holy crap, how have I lived without that website??

  • playa manhattan||

    I'm not sure what just happened.

  • kibby||

    I'm not now either. You're confusing me.

  • playa manhattan||

    I clicked on the link and it redirected 6 times. 2nd time was OK. I might be wiretapped.

  • ||

    I think a better question is "how did I live without Crater Lake gin?"

  • kibby||

    I don't think we get that here.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    You know what I find delicious? Chocolate milk.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Racist.

  • John C. Randolph||

    No, no.. It's only racist if he doesn't like chocolate milk.

    -jcr

  • playa manhattan||

    LAGUNTIAS. Again. I offered you one last time you stopped by.

  • ||

    I picked up Guinness to use as a stew base and there's some Golden Road IPA from my roommate.

    We're understocked on beer currently.

  • playa manhattan||

    Here's a crazy idea: drink the Guinness now. Get more tomorrow for stew.

    How's the pizza coming?

  • ||

    I'm drinking a G&T, just not the G&T I was planning on.

    I ate most of the pizza, I've got a few pieces left but they're looking iffy.

  • playa manhattan||

    We're at the 2 week mark now. It was trash day today, so mine's gone.

  • ||

    Mine will go out tomorrow when I do the ritual purging of the vegetables that my roommate purchased and immediately forgot about a month ago.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Oh, the political commissars will be placed in the newsroom. Hopefully by then, however, licensed news media won't mean as much.

  • Bam!||

    The government never gives up power. Stop teasing us with the idea of closing the FCC.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Foster horning in on Welch's interview.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Oh and here comes Kennedy.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I will send the show five dollars if she simulates auto fellatio.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Isn't that what the Benz commercial is doing?

  • ||

    I'll send $100.

    Don't hold me to that!

  • SweatingGin||

    Kennedy + Rude + Sword == More Gin.

  • playa manhattan||

    Is your computer still running slow? Still?

  • Bam!||

    How exactly is the topical storm different from the rest of the show?

  • SweatingGin||

    Fake british accent.

  • ||

    Can someone kindly give me the link to the online streaming of the show? The power went out in my room just now.

  • ||

    Official link.

    I know there are other ones that don't need a log in.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    http://www.baqiworld.com/2011/.....ness-live/

    Someone else showed this to me, and from me to you.

  • ||

    Much appreciated.

  • playa manhattan||

    Your room is on a separate breaker?

  • ||

    Apparently. First the living room was dark and my dad proceeded to knock out power in my room messing with the breakers outside. The rest of the house is okay though

    I actually have one socket providing power since my desk lamp is on. Other than that my TV is not getting anything.

  • playa manhattan||

    Refuse to pay rent this month. I'll represent you if needed.

  • ||

    Are those sparks between Kmele and Kennedy that I see?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Of course he was terrified. There were Frogs everywhere.

  • kibby||

    + EVERYTHING to you.

  • ||

    Jamaican? I thought Kmele was some sort of outer space potato man.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    This show is lactose intolerant.

  • ||

    Hans Landa likes this.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Cheese in a waffle? No. Everything else? Okay.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Wow, a taco waffle! I wouldn't even need drugs for this!

  • ||

    But think about how much better it would be WITH them.

  • SweatingGin||

    Wow, Matt. That Super-bowl pot legalization joke sure held up good.

  • GILMORE||

    Independents Attire Review, Feb 24 2014:

    - Kennedy: Bears her delicate neck and arouses the inner vampire of men worldwide. And wearing a blue so blue that Elvis' shoes should sue.

    - Matt: More neutral than Switzerland during the Holocaust, tonight Matt evades continued criticism of his erstwhile anti-social shirt-tie color coordination by going for a narcolepsy-inducing 'brown-on-grey-on-black' combination that makes My Three Sons look like Avatar in 3d.

    - Kmele*: Yet again squeaking by with the "I just can't say anything bad about the dude" consolation prize, Kmele wears nothing worth mentioning really, and still looks better than Matt, invoking reflections on the saying, "The Soft Bigotry of Low Expectations". Lesson here, Matt: even a slightly improved collar can make the same thing look a lot better.

    Thug life, indeed.

    *We still wonder where the fuck he keeps finding new lapel pins every day. I suspect a conspiracy by freemasons.

  • GILMORE||

    "BARES"

    (group of pedantic bears release me from custody)

  • ||

    Oh please. Waffles aren't stoner food. When I have the munchies, the last thing I want is a waffle. No, what I want is a Choco Taco.

  • playa manhattan||

    You must have a reliable ice cream truck or gas station nearby.

  • GILMORE||

    - 100 points for reminding us that Green Day once existed

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    This burial vault company will let you down for the last time!

  • Bam!||

    Dead people watch Fox Business? Burial vaults, huh?

  • Derpetologist||

    The new Robocop movie does not have the "I'd buy that for a dollar" guy, but it did pay homage to the line. I was pleased.

  • ||

    Give us money and we'll help delay the inevitable decay of your loved one's coffin.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    A commercial for coffin makers. Fox Biz knows its audience demo.

  • BigT||

    Commercial for Wilbert Burial Vaults??

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Ima get me a Wilbert burial vault.

    Wow, talk about knowing your advertising audience.

  • GILMORE||

    can we do a whole episode about the "I was once in Jamaica and saw a dude attack someone with a Machete" story, now?

  • playa manhattan||

    I love these charismatic guests.

  • playa manhattan||

    And now I know her home address.

  • kibby||

    Agreed. It's a wild ride!

  • SIV||

    COLLOIDAL SILVER!!

  • SIV||

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    NEVER HAVE A SPECIAL REPORT DONE OF YOUR LIFESTYLE.

  • SweatingGin||

    COLLOIDAL SILVER!?!? SHIT, WE GOT OUR NEXT BLUE LIBERTARIAN HERE!

    Kennedy: if you want to interview a kook, make it Epi, please.

  • ||

    Yeah, even I would be a better guest than this lady, and I would include feces-slinging for free.

  • playa manhattan||

    Choco Tacos ain't free.

  • GILMORE||

    I want to meet the person whose job it is to pre-screen each night's guests.

    If there IS such a person.

  • playa manhattan||

    I'm going to..... make a statement........ and you..... won't know...... when.... it's....... over......

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    In their defense, there's significant latency in remotes, and the guest can't see the hosts. It's technically not even to the level of FaceTime.

  • playa manhattan||

    I don't doubt it, but a 5 minute crash course could have helped...

  • Sevo||

    GILMORE|2.24.14 @ 9:43PM|#
    "I want to meet the person whose job it is to pre-screen each night's guests."

    Cause you want to critique their clothes, right?

  • GILMORE||

    No, I don't believe they exist.

    Because, *that*.

  • ||

    Why would you invite on guests like this lady? Are you trying to make everything more difficult for yourselves?

  • SweatingGin||

    INSPIRATION?!? HER INSPIRATION IS THE FUCKING BLUE LIBERTARIAN!

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    She's a prepper!

  • ||

    She's treating her water with colloidal silver and hasn't turned blue yet?

    I feel cheated.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Are you making fun of a guy for his skin color?

  • ||

    His skin color is a choice, so yes. I hope he finds a lovely Smurfette some day.

  • SweatingGin||

    I thought he died recently. Not from being blue, of course. Just checked, appears to be still alive.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Michael Jackson's skin color was a choice, and no-one...wait, let me look for another example...

  • playa manhattan||

    Is that Nick without the jacket?

  • SweatingGin||

    "We'll follow this story for sure" is Kennedy for "fuck off"

  • ||

    So was that last guest...human?

  • ||

    Is the three people making a baby thing going to be using a donor egg and inserting the nucleus of another person than fertilizing with sperm from a third person? Because they did that in Spain a few years ago.

  • ||

    (insert 3 Men and a Baby joke, with disparaging references to Steve Guttenberg and Police Academy)

  • ||

    Seriously, who is Steve Guttenberg and what is 'Police Academy'?

  • ||

    Get the fuck off my lawn whippersnapper!

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    You can sue for moobs?

    "I can't promise you a large cash settlement, but I...promise you...a large cash settlement."

  • GILMORE||

    you can see matt struggling to restrain himself from air-drumming. inside, he seethes with hate. Damn you GILMORE, damn you.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    No Asian DNA in the mix? Racists.

  • ||

    Haha, a molestation joke is just the thing to make this show more appealing. Nice one Kennedy

  • GILMORE||

    GAVIN!

  • ||

    "Dear Uncle Zoid, greetings from your long-lost nephew. Norm and Sam and Sadie's boy, remember?"

  • ||

    I don't think this is a designer baby thing, you're just getting the mDNA from the egg donor. They aren't cutting and pasting in the DNA.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    It may sound harsh, but God does not want you to have babies.

  • ||

    As Rand Paul can tell you, this is like the movie Gattaca.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    IS this all there is!

  • BigT||

    Old one heart!!

  • kibby||

    The Doctor likes this comment. Actually, he might not. The Master would, though.

  • ||

    We don't allow Dr. Who references around here, kibby. We have taste.

  • kibby||

    I don't recognize your authority because you spelled it "Dr.".

  • SweatingGin||

  • kibby||

    YES. Very few things have made me super happy about this season of Archer, but Lucky Yates finally being bumped up to main credits was definitely one of them.

  • ||

    I may like Star Trek, but even I am not nerdy enough to get into Dr. Who.

  • ||

    That's because Doctor (see kibby?!?) Who is science fiction for people who don't like science fiction.

  • kibby||

    I like science fiction, but I also enjoy pure entertainment sometimes -- DW is fun, ridiculous & still manages to make me cry on a regular basis.

  • ||

    There was apparently a Doctor Who conference near LAX last weekend. An acquaintance said it was quite fun.

  • playa manhattan||

    Was that acquaintance you?

  • ||

    Was that acquaintance you?

    You make it sound like I'm not willing to embarrass myself in public.

    He's a potential friend with benefits. We're working on scheduling conflicts. Now do you see why I went with "acquaintance"?

  • playa manhattan||

    I would have guessed it's because he's a Dr Who fan.

  • ||

    I'm not looking to date him, and it's not like being a Whovian is an STI.

  • SweatingGin||

    jesse.in.mb|2.24.14 @ 10:46PM|#|–|filternamelinkcustom

    I'm not looking to date him, and it's not like being a Whovian is an STI.

    Who's naive now, Jesse?

  • ||

    I'm actually trying to remember if it was an ex that got me watching Doctor Who or not.

    In all fairness I'm two seasons behind. I don't even know what happens to Rory and Amy Pond.

  • SweatingGin||

    These show addictions happen. I've gone through the DW addiction, as well as the Law and Order, and House ones. Might even admit to buffy. Not ashamed. Still will make fun of others for the same addictions.

  • SweatingGin||

    A likely story. Jesse will link to a 55 gallon drum of lube on amazon, but not admit to liking doctor who.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    They had to go all gooey to attract the female audience.

  • kibby||

    Yeah...girls do sort of ruin everything.

    My favorite is Five & he was long before they started the whole kissing every companion thing. Five had people who hated him crammed into the TARDIS & it was endlessly enjoyable.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Those babies will offer the world ORDER!

  • playa manhattan||

    One thing is for sure: El Chapo is a logistical genius.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Doesn't the CIA have anyone to fill that power vacuum?

  • SweatingGin||

    THEN WE FILL THAT VACUUM
    AS POPULAR WAR ADVANCES
    PEACE IS CLOSER

    Insert slash solo here

  • Bam!||

    Matt looked a bit red.

  • ||

    I knew it, Matt's an orgy guy.

  • ||

    That wasn't completely obvious from the get-go?

  • ||

    Let's see: went to UC Santa Barbara, lived many years in Europe, married a French broad...yeah, I see your point.

  • playa manhattan||

    I didn't know he went to UCSB. Somebody test that guy for STDs!!!

  • GILMORE||

    he is very proud of the fact he never finished.

    which is really no different from those who did finish.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Wow, bumper music silenced for Ramis.

  • BigT||

    Is there a link to their after-show? Is it ever worth watching or is it like an after-birth?

  • ||

    They attempted to make the after show a live-call in event, but none of us could see it because the damn show streamed in spurts.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

  • playa manhattan||

    You couldn't pay me to click that. Not after your "Hey Man Nice Shot" link.

  • Francisco d Anconia||

    Oh, come on. It's the Heartbreakers.

  • Bam!||

    Well, from previ-[BUFFERING]

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    New York only knows up...because the economy is flat on its back

    (old joke)

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Groundhog Day!

  • ||

    Dr. Peter Venkman: Egon, this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole through your head. Remember that?

    Dr. Egon Spengler: That would have worked if you hadn't stopped me.

  • SweatingGin||

    Jebus.. I don't get broken up about celebrity deaths. I've run a dead pool.

    But Egon, man. Harold Ramis... gah

  • playa manhattan||

    There's nothing not to like about the guy. Nothing.

  • GILMORE||

    If they mention "Year One" it will be as a joke.

  • ||

    Meatballs sucks ass, Matt. It completely failed to live up to its potential.

  • SweatingGin||

    I was under the impression that it's potential was '80s T&A (it's been 25+ years since I saw any part of it, so I may be misremembering)

  • Bam!||

    I'd like The Independents to make a RiffTrax-style Libertarian commentary track for GhostBustsers.

  • ||

    She just called you people crazy!

  • ||

    It's a fair cop.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    AH! Lou Dobbs.

  • BigT||

    INDEPENDENTS DISPERSE

  • Sevo||

    Darn you, BigT!

  • Sevo||

    So do independents disassemble?

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    I think it's like that Voltron guy.

  • SweatingGin||

    More like Rorshach

  • ||

    AAAGHHH, Lou Dobbs on my laptop!

  • GILMORE||

    I'm not waiting for Dobbs...

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    "The Live Stream will begin soon"

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Either there's something wrong with my reception, or the Independents After Dark show consists of them doing their laundry, spinning the clothes round and round in the dark.

  • ||

    They're just giving you time to refresh your beverage before the after show portion.

  • SweatingGin||

    I can sneak a beer in the buffering time... and I will.

  • GILMORE||

    And by 'live' stream, they mean, 'like, whenever..'

  • SweatingGin||

    It's on. BUFFERING. now back.

  • GILMORE||

    Matt must be changing into his 'casual' outfit.

    Which is, 'unbutton collar'.

  • Wandering Texan||

    All I see is a swirly series of white circles.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Don't go into them!

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

  • GILMORE||

    No

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    I've got an idea for you, The Independents, re: Live Stream, how about you get your shit together or fucking forget it altogether. I mean, reason can stream annoying autorun ads with the sound enabled every time you refresh, but some how Fox Biz can't stream low res without it skipping and repeating.

  • kibby||

    YES. Bring this to someone's attention, Matt. It's frustrating as all hell.

  • GILMORE||

    WHAT?! HECTOR?

  • GILMORE||

    THERE IS NO BEEF WITH ANIMAL HOUSE

  • ||

    Ok goddammit, I am going to break down and spend money on a new Mac. I had a nice laptop, but my damn dog hiked his leg on it.. Freakin Jack Russels have wings. He hopped up on my desk and pissed on my mac when I went to the kitchen for more vodka. Fucker. For the past two months I have been barely getting by on an ipad, but that just isnt a computer.

    I hope the computer salesman has a crowbar to pry me away from my money.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    What kind of mac will you be getting?

  • SweatingGin||

    For fucks sake. You expect us to believe your dog pissed on it?

    Think Retina...

  • ||

    Yeah, he did, and it wasnt the first time.

    He shorted out the keyboard the first time. I replaced it with a wireless keyboard. Unfortunately this time it ran into the guts of the computer and corroded the hell out of everything.

    As to what I am getting, I figure I will suggest we get a middle of the road desktop,, but the wife will insist on the top of the line. Hell, I know that is what will happen. So, whatever the top of the line Mac desktop is, that will be it.

  • ||

    Ha. I am slow. I just got your joke.

  • SweatingGin||

    If it makes you feel any better, I spilled gin in my previous air.

    Really fun at the apple store. "yea, SSD is shorted. Battery is shorted. Logic Board is shorted."

    "Yea, I know. There's gin in it. Flat rate repair, please."

  • playa manhattan||

    "Applecare plz".

  • SweatingGin||

    Literally the one time I didn't.

  • GILMORE||

    As to what I am getting...

    A cat?

  • Cytotoxic||

    Clearly your dog has the taste and good sense in computers that you lack.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    OS/2 forever!

  • BuSab Agent||

    I must say you are are very forgiving. If my dog pissed on my computer I'd call the police.

  • GILMORE||

    UC Santa Barbara was never a real college matt.

  • playa manhattan||

    State your alma mater, son.

    I've worked with a lot of good econ majors out of UCSB. They all like a good health plan that covers STDs.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    I need a new car. which Certified Pre-owned is the best value?
    Go

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Buy American! Get a Toyota.

  • GILMORE||

    Hi-Five

  • GILMORE||

    uh, requirements?

    not knowing anything, I'd just blurt "Civic" because they do 200K miles virtually sans maintenance.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    no family. partial to hatches

  • GILMORE||

    hm. Subaru?

    I am really not the guy to ask. My last car was a truck. And I watch too much Top Gear.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    My VW lived 14 years.

  • SPG_900||

    partial to hatches? Mazda 3 or a gulf.
    and the speed3 has 260 horsepower. both good little cars

    subarus arent the most reliable cars in the world, neither was VW(pre 2006)

  • seguin||

    Depends on the year. Around the mid-2000s they had severe transmission problems...automatic only.

  • SIV||

    Do they sell the same cars in Canada?

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    almost. we drive on the left. do you?
    our spedos and odometers are in *slowly* KILOMETERS

  • SIV||

    You need a second set of wheels for the snow tires?

    I'm kinda looking at this.
    About $2k cheaper w/o the unnecessary options. My car runs fine and still looks OK so I'm in no hurry.

  • playa manhattan||

    Is that the car with the hamster commercials?

  • SIV||

    No that is some Korean car. The Scion FRS is a Toyota made by Subaru (really).

  • playa manhattan||

    If it's not good enough for hamsters, it's not good enough for me!

  • SPG_900||

    I love the subaru/toyota coupes, besides the boxer engine, which im not real fond of. i have rear blizzaks on my rwd lexus in snowy wisconsin. get 4, trust me

  • SPG_900||

    Think of it like a mazda rx7/rx8 with +10 reliability/fuel econ and without 2 cycle oil consumption. Its a seriously good drivers car if you only need 2 proper seats.

  • SIV||

    I used to own a real AE86 so I like the nostalgia fix of the FRS I just wish it was about 3-400lbs lighter.

  • GILMORE||

    "Odometer?"

    in Canadian, I want to ask,

    "ay, What's an "oh" do?"
    "What?"
    "you know, like an Oh-doh-meter."

    it measures the amount of Canadian in the car?

  • seguin||

    Best value in a hatchback, huh?

    Unfortunately, we don't get Peugeots down here, so I can't honestly suggest that.

    I's a bit old, but the Saab 9-2X is an interesting choice. It's a Subaru Impreza with a nicer interior, so it should be able to be serviced at a Subaru dealership.

  • SPG_900||

    +1

  • GILMORE||

    I like watching the frozen image of Gavin Mcinnes in the middle of saying something possibly interesting. I will get my watercolors out and do a still life.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    Bob Ross would be proud
    *happy little tree, and his friend, Clyde*

  • kibby||

    I don't know how you'll capture that...coatsweater monstrosity.

  • GILMORE||

    Oh, but its cultural! TARTAN

    Since I know you enjoy clothing porn...

    ...I give ye: TWEED your eyes out!

    http://www.tweed-jacket.com/GALLERY PAGE/Bookster_Main_Photo_Gallery/index.htm

  • SweatingGin||

    If kibby doesn't go for it, I might.

    No elbow pads, though. I'm no professor, even if I smell like one.

  • GILMORE||

    Its actually quite affordable for what you get. The quality is excellent. I have an overcoat I got in 2002, paid maybe $500. In the US you can't get stuff this nice under a grand.

  • GILMORE||

    in case I SF'd the link

    http://www.tweed-jacket.com/index.html

    ..go to gallery

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Wait. We smell like something? Is it worse than teacher breath?

  • SweatingGin||

    Christmas trees. Juniper. Gin.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    Christmas trees. Juniper. Gin.

    You know, that would make a decent fougère.

    I'd wear that scent. Right now, I'm in the Bay Rum part of the year, waiting to switch to lilac-floral come Springtime.

  • SweatingGin||

    Christmas trees. Juniper. Gin.
    You know, that would make a decent fougère.

    I'd wear that scent. Right now, I'm in the Bay Rum part of the year, waiting to switch to lilac-floral come Springtime

    It's called Old Spice. Does a wonderful job covering the scent.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    Teacher breath is worse than tuna breath.

  • kibby||

    It's like being immersed in an episode of Hannibal. I actually love the crap out of this sort of stuff, because nothing makes a man sexier than nice, well-tailored clothes...but Gavin's thing tonight was just awful.

  • Heroic Mulatto||

    because nothing makes a man sexier than nice, well-tailored clothes

    Thank you. Now keep repeating that until my co-genderists get it.

  • kibby||

    I'd shout it from the mountains if I thought it'd made a lick of difference to 99.9999% of you.

  • ||

    Sorry Rich Uncle Pennybags, not all of us have extra money to spend making fine tailored suits.

  • kibby||

    Find yourself a decent tailor -- they can make a cheaper suit fit you correctly.

  • playa manhattan||

    He made up for it with his wit.

  • SweatingGin||

    The skipping is awesome. Huey Lewis.... American Psycho... about to cut the girl up... hummed ghostbusters theme...


    CUT TO BLACK.

  • GILMORE||

    I'm still looking at frozen gavin macinnes.

  • GILMORE||

    I give up. they should be aware that even their devotees aren't watching anymore. And that we think they are sad.

  • ||

    And I am almost out of smokes. FUCK. I did not want to have to go out again.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    quit smoking? your problems are easy.

  • playa manhattan||

    Or, Costco.

  • ||

    Why would I quit smoking? That would be like quitting weed or booze.

  • ||

    Here it is, the inevitable feminist critique of 'True Detective'

    To state the obvious: while the male detectives of “True Detective” are avenging women and children, and bro-bonding over “crazy pussy,” every live woman they meet is paper-thin. Wives and sluts and daughters—none with any interior life. Instead of an ensemble, “True Detective” has just two characters, the family-man adulterer Marty, who seems like a real and flawed person (and a reasonably interesting asshole, in Harrelson’s strong performance), and Rust, who is a macho fantasy straight out of Carlos Castaneda.

    You know, I'd say that's deliberate.

    Meanwhile, Marty’s wife, Maggie—played by Michelle Monaghan, she is the only prominent female character on the show—is an utter nothing-burger, all fuming prettiness with zero insides. Stand her next to any other betrayed wife on television—Mellie, on “Scandal”; or Alicia, on “The Good Wife”; or Cersei, on “Game of Thrones”; or even Claire, on “House of Cards”—and Maggie’s an outline, too.

    Because--again--it's a story deliberately told from the point of view of two male detectives. We don't know Maggie because neither character really knows her or cares to know her.

    But all this has worked in that creator Nic Pizzolatto has promised more developed female characters next season.

  • playa manhattan||

    Knock it off. I don't care. Not even a little bit.

  • ||

    Cersei is a betrayed wife?!? The chick that bangs her own brother secretly and has multiple children with him?!?

  • kibby||

    Yeah, uh...Cersei is the least victimized person ever for quite some time. & when she gets taken down a few notches, she absolutely deserves every bit of it.

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Stand her next to any other betrayed wife on television


    Probably won't make it on to TV since it was a thought, but

    “And you must feel so much lighter now, clean and innocent as a maid on the morning of her wedding.” I fucked Jaime on the morning of my wedding, the queen recalled.

    Cersei is a dirty, murderous, psychopathic skank, no matter what the feminists would like her to be. And if you read the books, she's pretty much been that way since the tender age of 8.

  • ||

    SPOILERS!

    Actually I knew that part. I think I'm only two seasons behind at this point.

  • playa manhattan||

    If only Obama would spill the beans. He requested and received all of the episodes of TD in advance.

    Top Men.

  • ||

    I am not much of a TV watcher, but TD has me hooked. Both of those guys have done good work in the past, but their performances on TD are fanfuckingtastic. I would say they will always look back at this as their peak.
    The show is well written, iimpossible to look away from, and chock full of great lines.

    It is also set in Louisiana.

  • playa manhattan||

    The last episode was just a soap opera, though. One that I willingly watched.

  • MJGreen||

    Show about two men focuses intently on two men. More at 11.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Heck with the aftershow. Try this:

    "If one looks closely at the famous painting, The Garden of Earthly Delights, created by Hieronymous Bosch around the year 1500, you can find many strange images. This includes a scene in hell where someone has musical notes on their butt. Now, a student has deciphered what this music sounded like."

    http://www.medievalists.net/20.....ound-like/

  • SweatingGin||

    Monty Python did it

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Before Bosch?

  • SweatingGin||

    WHOOSH!

    Holy Grail, in between scenes when the angles stick trumpets in their asses and fart out heraldry.

  • Notorious G.K.C.||

    Ky point was, who was tge genius who thought of it first? And that would be Hire....Here...Mr. Bosch.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

  • playa manhattan||

    Funny, my town is in the process of building a new 21,500 sqft library so that bums have somewhere to fuck.

  • ||

    Hey, it's not just bums!

  • SweatingGin||

    That's not enough to make us not believe it was you at the Doctor Who convention.

  • SweatingGin||

    Sounds like Mt. Gox might be done for. Trading suspended.

  • ||

    Mt. Gox web site looks down as well.

    There goes my $200 i put in it a year or two ago.

    So where does one trade now?

  • SweatingGin||

    trading? Maybe btc-e (shady russians) or bitstamp (not sure what they have for trading)

    coinbase for buying/holding.

  • ||

    lulz coinbase just went offline.

  • SweatingGin||

    Oh, Kraken is an up-and-coming exchange. Don't know how they are.

    Pro-tip: if not actively trading it, get your BTC out to your own wallet.

  • ||

    Well it was only $200...

    Basically just legalized gambling for me...and much cheaper then playing slot machines.

    Hell $200 over two years is less then most gamblers spend on lottery tickets in half that time.

    But yeah if i get back in i will spread my BTC around including in my own wallet.

  • Cytotoxic||

    Good. Mt. Gox has been a pox on BTC for a long time now.

  • SIV||

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

  • SIV||

    I'm all for cutting off Walmart's lucrative USDA subsidy so long as their competitors lose it too.

  • ||

    There you have it. She states it unequivocally. Not giving is taking.

    Fuck her.

  • Sevo||

    "UAW plans to keep trying on Tesla workers' representation"
    Rent-seeker vs. rent-seeker! Who wins in this epic battle for your dollars?!
    http://www.sfgate.com/business.....263864.php

  • SIV||

    Never thought I'd root for the UAW. My apologies to Tesla employees.

  • Archduke von Pantsfan||

    both Zooey and Vera Farminga are on the Craig Ferguson show tonight?
    WOW

  • SPG_900||

    OT. My good friend, who is in the navy, asked me if I could be a reference for him. I was cool with that until he told me I may get a few questions from the CIA, which sounds a bit scary...

    thoughts?

  • BuSab Agent||

    Actually it's SOP for any clearance. But it can be strangely silly. When I was getting my Secret clearance, they wanted a list of all my friends and associates for the previous 15 years. Since I was 17 at the time, trying to remember who I was hanging with at the age of 2 was a bit tricky.

  • Tejicano||

    Unless he is going for some extreme top secret position inside the CIA or possibly Secret Service I doubt they would be the ones to call you.

    A buddy of mine was getting his top secret clearance re-newed and I was one of his references. I was contacted by and met with the guy who was running the background check - he was retired military on a contract. Not even a current us.gov employee.

    It's really no big deal and they simply don't have reason/time to gather any extra data on you.

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