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Politics

Charles Krauthammer's Inspired "Don't Touch My Junk" Rant Ends With Uncomfortable Image of "Sleeping Giant" Awakening

Nick Gillespie | 11.19.2010 8:55 AM

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Strangely, the one time I actually met conservative Wash Post columnist and Fox News "all-star" Charles Krauthammer was years ago and we got into an argument over whether the "coarsening of the culture" was a bad thing, It was, in his view. He didn't like the cussing and cleavage and all that crap.

Here's his lastest col, which is good stuff, even if it shows more shlong than Long Dong Silver: 

Don't touch my junk is the anthem of the modern man, the Tea Party patriot, the late-life libertarian, the midterm election voter. Don't touch my junk, Obamacare - get out of my doctor's examining room, I'm wearing a paper-thin gown slit down the back. Don't touch my junk, Google - Street View is cool, but get off my street. Don't touch my junk, you airport security goon - my package belongs to no one but me, and do you really think I'm a Nigerian nut job preparing for my 72-virgin orgy by blowing my johnson to kingdom come?…

This time you have gone too far, Big Bro'. The sleeping giant awakes. Take my shoes, remove my belt, waste my time and try my patience. But don't touch my junk.

Sleeping giant awakens? The terrorists, or maybe just Viagra ads, have won, yet again. More here.

Hat tip: Chris Lehmann's Twitter feed.

In theaters now: Con Air 2010. This holiday season, we're all treated like prisoners.

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Nick Gillespie is an editor at large at Reason and host of The Reason Interview With Nick Gillespie.

PoliticsObamacareReason.tvTerrorismMediaWorldNanny StateCulturePolicy
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