Get Us to 500 Donors, Or That's the Last You'll See of Lobster Girl

Take a good long look at this blog post. Do you notice a woman kissing a lobster? For longtime readers of the site, Lobster Girl is a familiar, even comforting presence. Now move your eyes to the upper right-hand corner of the main blog page. See that little gray-scale crawling up the torch? If that doesn't reach the top within eight days–if we don't total 500 donors to the Reason Foundation at $25 or over throughout the course of our webathon–then Lobster Girl will be swept into the steel trap of history.

It's that serious.

This pitch goes out to some of our most loyal and beloved customers: You, the readers, refreshers, and serial commenters at Hit & Run. You love to love (or love to hate) a site-within-a-site that has been called one of "five winning political blogs" by Playboy, the "No. 1 Libertarian Blog" by WebPreneur, and "Best Weblog" (on multiple occasions) by the Los Angeles Press Club. You take full, hilarious, and profane advantage of the fact that we value you highly enough to open all our content to comments. Ask yourself: what other political magazine or website has encouraged commenters, wart(y)s and all, for most of this decade? And of that tiny subset, how many actively participate within the comments, instead of standing miles away in full radiation gear?

We hat tip you when we use your suggestions, promptly correct mistakes when you bring them to our attention, make bets on how many comments certain threads will last before sinking into the deepest muck, and (most importantly) talk hella-trash about you in the office. (Vanneman, you have no idea....) We even invite you to parties (brotherben, I'm looking at you), debate over the finer points of asking politicians the hard questions and uploading their answers to YouTube, and occasionally talk shop with you at Spring Training games. For all of this we ask nothing in return.

UNTIL THIS WEEK.

Look, besides the sometimes grim task of tracking liberties lost or threatened, besides tallying up isolated incidents of unspeakable abuses of power, besides arguing free-market economics in age of FDR nostalgia, we're trying to entertain you here. Where else are you going to see creepy NRA swimsuit gals from the '30s, or creepier child art depicting Waco? Who else is going to give you mice in transparent high heels? And don't even get me started about the alt text....

So here's the deal: You want Lobster Girl, and all the random acts of freedom she represents? Pony up a little cash. Twenty-five bones gets you a "Free Minds and Free Markets" bumper sticker, and a clean conscience. A C-note buys you a bumper sticker, a subscription, and either Brian Doherty's comprehensive history Radicals for Capitalism or Peter Bagge's hi-larious collection of Reason comics, Everybody is Stupid Except For Me! Two-fitty gets you even more schwag, and $1,000 buys you access to things even Ron Bailey hasn't contemplated.

And if we don't reach our goal of 500 donations, then, well, expect more like this.

Donate today.

Editor's Note: We invite comments and request that they be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of Reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason at any time. Report abuses.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Hey! This is blackm-

    Ooo, sideboob!

  • Warty||

    I LOOM LARGE

  • anon||

    right click ----> save as

  • ||

    You take full, hilarious, and profane advantage of the fact that we value you highly enough to open all our content to comments.

    Hey now. No need to make it personal.

  • Xeones||

    FUCK

  • Rimfax||

    This is racist...isn't it?!!

  • Barack Obama||

    "Get Us to 500 Donors, Or That's the Last You'll See of Lobster Girl"

    As if everyone at H&R hasn't already downloaded that picture.

  • Barack Obama||

    BTW, Did Tony finally succumb to the Gay Plague?

  • anarch||

    Molon labe.

  • ||

  • Matt Welch||

    This will be used very soon, thanks.

  • ||

    "Now move your eyes to the upper right-hand corner of the main blog page."

    Major Fail.

    Wouldn't it be smarter to put the Torch-meter RIGHT NEXT TO lobster girl? Or hell, drop the torch and put lobster girl IN the meter. The goal is reached when the line reaches where her and the lobster meet.

  • peachy||

    Or kinda like "Major League" - cover the Lobster Girl pic in five hundred tiny virtual 'Reason' stickers, and remove one each time a donation comes in... the side-boob showing up last, of course.

  • ||

    2 better ideas in just an hour. Time to whip your fundraising staff into shape.

  • Mad Max||

    Ew, that's nasty!

    Whip your staff on your own time.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    Yer awesome, Mad Max.

  • ||

    The donate link goes to a 404 page. Perhaps you could have given the Squirrel a little shout out in the post.

  • Matt Welch||

    Fixed, thanks.

    SEE???

  • ||

    What inducements are you offering female H&R commenters?

  • Warty||

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • Dave||

    Female? lol Thats funny.

  • ||

    They don't have to kiss the lobster.

  • ||

    Well, it is and it isn't. She should be made to smell the glove.

  • Naga Sadow||

    *gags*

  • ||

    ACtually I think being allowed to smell Gillespie's jacket is one of the fund raising incentives.

  • ||

    That's what you get for a $1,000. He wears the jacket for a week then mails it to you. Like those dirty underwear vending machines in Japan.

  • John Tagliaferro||

    +11

  • Mike Laursen||

    Carpet-humping guy?

  • Joette||

    Yeah! Side-boob is nice and all, but I can see the same thing in the mirror daily.

  • ||

    Eggzackly. Hell, I nurse and pump, so I get an eyeful of my own boobage every day.

    So what's in it for us straight chicks?

  • hamilton||

    You can be in the next lobster pic?

  • ||

    Now there's an idea!

  • ||

    Do I need to send a self-photo of in the mirror hairy back-titty sideboob?

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    You know the staff would end up using that image on Hit & Run, right?

  • ||

    By mistakenly posting it as their mother's picture in the fambly album?

  • EJM||

    If that doesn't reach the top within eight days...

    If it's truly running from the 12th (today) through the 20th, wouldn't that make it nine days?

    (Ducks out quickly.)

  • ||

    No, not if it starts and ends at the same time.

    If it started at, say, noon today, then noon tomorrow will mark one day. Noon on the 14th will mark two days. And so on down the line until noon on the 20th, upon which the eighth day will have been completed.

  • EJM||

    You're right about it being eight days, if it starts and ends at the same time of the day (e.g., noon). That said, I saw the mentions this morning, so my hunch is that the range would be closer to this morning through next Friday night.

  • ||

    Hey, you said you were ducking out!

  • EJM||

    I didn't say that I wouldn't return. ;)

  • ¢||

    Where else are you going to see creepy NRA swimsuit gals from the '30s, or creepier child art depicting Waco?

    In the Anacronistic Revenge Rape room of the Paleo wing of my nine-acre underground Montana spank bank, that's where.

    Fuckin' asteroids can't blackmail me. Know your role.

  • Qualis Artifex Pereo||

    I was about to say, "fine, I'll give a hundred bucks" but now I want to spend that money supporting this underground spank bank.

  • db||

    Someone should donate and have their name posted as "APTTQAPTAOF"

  • Qualis Artifex Pereo||

    Can you please be David Boaz?

  • db||

    You got half the name right.

  • ||

    Bowie?

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    I don't understand the reference. Mayday! Mayday!

  • db||

    Gawddemmit. I meant "APTTQAPTAOYT"

  • ||

    Maybe if we could donate anonymously. Most of us worry about subpoenas, you know. And I have bench warrant out for my arrest in Indiana.

  • BakedPenguin||

    The good thing is, why the hell would you ever go to Indiana again?

  • ||

    I've been an outlaw so long, I don't remember what life was like before.

  • John Tagliaferro||

    That's what you get for blabbing about your role in the development of "Lonewacko the Movie".

  • The Squatting Fields||

    For years I had a bench warrant in the state I resided. Make seeing flashing cop car lights in the rearview mirror scary as fuck.

  • hamilton||

    You black-hearted assholes.

    Ok, I contributed $250. Now when does the lobster take it all off?

  • BakedPenguin||

    There's an idea, as the torch climbs, the swimsuit becomes transparent, like those novelty-drink glasses.

  • db||

    I like it...presumably Reason could get LG to pose for a special spread in honor of the donors.

  • ||

    i'm betting that lobster "took it all off" shortly after that pic was taken. Of course, he was helped out of his clothes with some tools and drawn butter...

  • ||

    That doesn't just win the thread, it wins the whole freaking archive!

  • Naga Sadow||

    If Welch does a Steve Smith article, I'm in for twenty-five. Otherwise, no.

  • ||

    Blurred photographs? Maybe an audio clips of strange cries in the night? Would that do?

  • Naga Sadow||

    Nope. I want in depth coverage of Steve Smith. No ghostly sasquatch photo either.

  • Matt Welch||

    Define "does."

  • Naga Sadow||

    does (dz)
    v.
    Third person singular present tense of do

    No need to be violated by Steve Smith. Just an article on him.

  • ||

    All I have is ghostly.

    And think about the implications if the book is right...

  • Naga Sadow||

    He's psychic? Of course! It explains so much. It's why he's never caught.

  • Episiarch||

    Write an article using the style and meter of Steve Smith. Chop chop, Welch, get to it if you want your money. If I don't laugh out loud, you don't get squat.

  • ||

    MUST WRITE ALL-CAPS!

  • Warty||

    STEVE SMITH DONATE RAPE

  • ||

    And you said there was nothing in it for the ladies.

  • ||

    But he mailed in his donation. Rape doesn't go through the postal service well.

  • Naga Sadow||

    Chain letter rape?

  • ||

    Only because you're using USPS. What can brown do for you, Sug?

  • ||

    Uh, I'm not into that. You're a sweet girl and all, but I'm not cool with being pooped on. Maybe Warty could help you with that.

  • ||

    Look, Steve Smith was complaining about your performance. Just trying to increase your chances, you Kentucky-Fried oaf.

  • ||

    And I was just telling everyone how pretty you are for a Canadian.

    Can someone take this knife out of my back?

  • Episiarch||

    But last night when you pooped on me you said I could do it to you tonight! LIAR!

  • ||

    Seattle has destroyed your mind.

  • ||

    I prefer FedEx, actually. At least the FedEx guy who visits my office is a hunk. The UPS guys... meh. Notsomuch.

  • ||

    If that doesn't reach the top within eight days–if we don't total 500 donors to the Reason Foundation at $25 or over throughout the course of our webathon–then Lobster Girl will be swept into the steel trap of history.

    Your bluffing Welch. You don't have the minerals.
    And when was the last time I got name checked on the main page? Remember, I'm the guy that gave you you're jacket blurb

  • ||

    Also on that thread, this stunning bit of erudition:

    Dan T. |6.27.07 @ 11:46AM|#
    Given that Hillary Clinton has already been chosen as the establishment's candidate, you might as well take these polls with "excluding everybody but Hillary Clinton"...
  • Matt Welch||

    Not bluffing. Also, eight days is a l-o-n-g time.

  • healthscarequotes||

    have you guys thought having incomprehensibly annoying ads along the side of the blog?

  • ||

    That's easily fixed by using Firefox with the AdBlock add-on...

  • BakedPenguin||

    We...promptly correct mistakes when you bring them to our attention...

    So you're claiming the fact that you use us as unpaid proofreaders / fact-checkers as a reason why we should donate? You have earned your monocle today, Matt.

  • Matt Welch||

    Oh hell yes!

  • ||

    We're also free to come mow any of their lawns after our donation.

  • db||

    So now that I've donated, can somebody please give me a straight explanation of who STEVE SMITH is?

  • ||

    He is a shaved Bigfoot, a normally gentle giant of the Pacific Northwest who taught himself to blog. But he took a wrong turn somewhere. Sad, really. A real kick in the teeth for old Chuck Darwin.

  • ||

    Notice how Steve Smith appeared not long after Epi moved to Seattle? Well, I did. Our formerly peaceful rainforests haven't been the same since.

  • ||

    OMG! Maybe he's a reverse weresquatch and will transform at the next new moon!

    OMG! The Twilight Saga: New Moon is due in theaters soon.

    Episiarch is a Stephanie Meyer character!

    RUN! GET OUT OF SEATTLE AT ALL COSTS!

  • ||

    Weresquatch is the best word ever.

  • ||

    It's an old word among my peoples. I sat at my grandfather's knee and heard tales of the fearsome weresquatch. How it would come in the dark, when the moon was full. It would find the huts of the women ripe for child and carry them away into the night. They would return days later, reeking of its musk. Soon they would grow heavy with child. A monster child. It would claw its way from their stomachs, making a noise like glass shattering on slate. The mothers never survived. And the child always was gone whenever someone gathered the courage to go and look for it. A blood trail was all that was left, disappearing into the darkest part of the forest. A son that finds its own father by some bestial instinct. Grandfather said that they had not come in many years, but he still bars the shutters on the full moon. And waits.

  • ||

    Why should we fear your weresasquatch when we deal with a wereSuki every single day?

  • JB||

    Oooh, sounds like 'Longtooth' by Edgar Pangborn:

    http://www.bestsf.net/reviews/.....maine.html

  • ||

    So Steve Smith was known to Edgar Pangborn?!? How old is this creature?

  • Episiarch||

    STEVE SMITH NOT EPISIARCH! STEVE LOOK MUCH MORE LIKE STEVE CORRELL, BUT RAPE-IER!

  • The Squatting Fields||

    I thought he played for the NY Giants.

  • Nipplemancer||

    you know that thing you fear most? that is afraid of steve smith.

  • ||

    Here is his much heralded first appearance (or close enough, I guess.)

    http://reason.com/blog/2009/07.....nt_1318383

    Click on his name to see the Bigfoot angle.

  • ||

    Awesome. A link to a previous thread on this very site just got marked spam by the new software.

    2nd try.

    The beginning (or close enough.) Click his name to see where Bigfoot comes in.

  • ||

    Forget about the books. For a $100 donation I want a coffee mug emblazoned with Lobster Girl.

  • Matt Welch||

    This is not a bad idea, at all.

  • hamilton||

    +1. Actually +2.5 given my donation.

  • ||

    Is this Reason or PBS's fall membership drive?

  • ||

    Drink!

  • ||

    Interesting that there have been no comments on that disturbing photoshop of Rand (or was it a photoshop?)...

  • ||

    They used it not long ago. It hasn't built it's shock value back up.

  • John Tagliaferro||

    I like that picture. Holding back my donation, cash, anonymously through a snail-mail remailer, until I see that Rand picture at least twice per week.

  • JB||

    A pox on any of your houses.

  • I, Kahn O'Clast||

    How much of my donation is going to Zuan for the use of his photo (lobster girl)? He is a professional photographer you know.

    In any event, I am already a subscriber but I suppose I would gladly display a bumper sticker.

  • ||

    I wanna donate, I really do. But damn, Matt, its hard to type my credit card number in with my left hand.

    Consider it a down payment on that internship if I should choose to apply within the next two days. Btw, I know I am a rather newer commenter, but I'm in the L.A. area, where's my invite to the Reason binge-drinking parties?

  • Hugh Akston||

    Check your masthead, junior. Reason pulled up stakes and moved to DC a while ago. Much easier to hobnob with the elite Beltway insiders. But much, much tougher to ask them the hard questions and post it on YouTube.

  • ||

    They still show an address on Sepulveda on the contact page... and the media contact # is a 310 area code. L.A. is so much cooler than that corrupt cespool in DC anyway

  • Sandi||

    I took a shit in LA once. It's been optioned.

  • The Squatting Fields||

    So the Lonewhacko is right. They live for the DC cocktail parties.

  • Rimfax||

    If the Lonewacko says that the sky is blue, you better rig for the apocalypse.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    I like that. "The" Lonewacko.

  • Logo Police||

    Note: Those are National Recovery Agency NRA girls. Not National Rifle Association NRA girls

  • ||

    You betcha. The girls of the National Rifle Association are a hell of a lot prettier.

  • ||

    You'll get my money the same time you get it every year; when I'm stuck in Ohio for days on end at Christmas, looking for something (anything) to do that doesn't involve interacting with the inlaws. I then lock myself in the guest room to "do research on this year's charitable donations" and cut you guys a check and play poker.

    ...and you'll not get it a day before, thank you very much.

  • Brett||

    You should pay me $25 for exposing me to that last picture.

  • ||

    I'm not really feeling the lobster girl thing, but I'll drop a few bucks to preserve free minds and inexpensive markets.

  • ||

    But did you check out the sideboob?

  • guy in the back row||

    What hapened to the reason pillow girl? Maybe if she made an appeal as well.....

  • Rimfax||

    I heard she got around. (That is, her image was used on a variety of sites with different stuff shopped on the pillow.)

  • CTHORM@IBIS||

    WTF YOU'RE HAVING PARTIES!?!

    Yeah, I'm in LA too...And I know Libertarian-friendly girls. You'll get my money tomorrow, when I get mine.

  • CTHORM@IBIS||

    I might not have been clear enough there. Invite plzthx

  • Naga Sadow||

    That's a fake email address! Nice try, brotherben.

  • ||

    WTF?

  • ||

    okay, so I RTFA. Naga, please note that I got my invite. And anyway, brotherben doesn't stopp to begging for a party invitation. I have, however, been asked to leave a party more than once. Some people just don't appreciate the difficulty I have dancing on the bar in heels after chasing the worm to mescalito's front door.

  • CTHORM@IBIS||

    Thanks for the dig, Uncle Ben!

  • Naga Sadow||

    Damn! I was so sure you were gonna troll under an assumed name. Sorry IBIS dude.

  • CTHORM@IBIS||

    That isn't an email address, it denotes where I work. If you are so inclined to spam me or ask for handouts, c.thorm@gmail.com

  • Warty||

    Have you considered having a joint bake sale with the Air Force?

  • ||

    Reflective belts mandatory.

  • ||

    Is a joint bake similar to a weenie roast?

  • ||

    i read "joint bake" differently

  • BakedPenguin||

    Bake sale? Well, selling quarter and eighth bags would be quicker than just asking for money.

    I don't think the Air Force would want to go in on it, though. They'd be better off trying to partner with the CIA or some local DC cops.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    Oh, you gotta have reflector belts, Nooge.

  • ||

    Don't tell me the Army does it too. Those things are getting out of hand.

    Check this out.

  • ||

    We get feministing style threaded comments and PBS style begging for dollars. What's next, columns from Leftitty?

    Oh yeah, Fuck Lobstergirl!

  • ||

    Just wait till they bring in washed-up music divas and retired football playerss for the Reason "Blogging with the Stars" competition.

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    I'm in!

  • ||

    Isn't it illegal for you to be including the photo of Lobster Girl in your posts anyway? You're not engaging in serious criticism or commentary the photo itself, so fair use doesn't apply. (and some of the posts including Lobster Girl have hi-res versions, which wouldn't fall under fair use even if you were commenting on the photo).

  • John Tagliaferro||

    Heads up Reason. The intertubez fuzz is circling your raft.

  • ||

    Tulpa?

  • ||

    That is some nice sideboob.

    There's your serious criticism. Oh, and you forgot to change your email for your troll name, Tulpa.

  • ||

    Actually, I forgot to change my name for my non-troll name.

    And commenting on the subject of the photo isn't going to cut it. You need to be talking about lighting, aspect ratio, background arrangement, or something else that involves only organs above the clavicle.

  • Rimfax||

    Uh, she's got nice DSLs. (The "L" stands for "Lips".)

  • The Squatting Fields||

    "You're not engaging in serious criticism or commentary the photo itself"

    The fuck we ain't.

  • I, Kahn O'Clast||

    Yeah. Pay Zuan already!

  • Mad Max||

    Who owns those photo rights?

    They could put their five children through college with the royalties.

  • Mad Max||

    Assuming their rights get enforced.

  • I, Kahn O'Clast||

  • JB||

    Muchos gracias!!!

  • Cliché Bandit||

    I am going to negotiate with terrorists.

    Get rid of threded comments and watch my contribution double.

    Sideboob is NEVER cliche

  • db||

    I will donate an additional $25 if threaded comments go away.

  • Naga Sadow||

    My contribution goes up to $50 if threaded comments are thrown on the dust bin of Reason history.

  • ||

    I'm down with the end of threaded comments. I am, however, a poor Obama supporter. Who's gonna kick in a nice chunk in my name?

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Hypocrites!

  • db||

    How so? My money goes where my mouth goes (and sometimes where it dare not go). Just so happens that a thread is a good way of emphasizing that multiple people feel similarly.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    Just so happens that a thread is a good way of emphasizing that multiple people feel similarly.

    But... you are... I mean...

    Ugh.

  • ||

    If you really need the money, kill Steve Chapman and sell his organs.

    You're welcome.

  • ||

    They have thought of that, but they don't have the right connections in the Mexican organ markets. Why do you think they are always editorializing in favor of organ markets? The day it becomes legal to sell is organs, is the day Chapman goes to the butcher.

  • Lee Cruz ||

    P Brooks wins the thread

  • ||

    For a $100 donation I want a coffee mug emblazoned with Lobster Girl.

    No, no, no.

    Brandy snifters! Handblown(?) by prison labor.

  • ||

    DagnyT is lobster girl in case anyone doesn't know.

  • ||

    Then where are my royalties, bitches?

  • ||

    Libertarians don't recognize intellectual property rights.

  • ||

    It's not smacky?

  • JB||

    That would seriously overload my receptors.

    Lobstergirl + Dagny handle

  • ||

    It is how imagine Dagny to be anyway. I have to admit, Dagny is the only commenter crush I have ever had, if you don't count that sordid little affair involving that slut Episiarch.

  • Death Panelist||

    We hat tip you when we use your suggestions, promptly correct mistakes when you bring them to our attention...

    Yeah, you made me look like a damn fool a few posts back by quietly correcting one of your mistakes.

  • Brian Sorgatz (or Wilson)||

    Lobster Girl (to the tune of "Surfer Girl")

    Little lobster-loving one
    Reason is in need of funds
    Will they drop you, will they, lobster girl

    I have seen your lovely face
    Pressed against a carapace
    Will they drop you, will they, lobster girl

    We could surf the web together
    While our love would gel
    Would you find me more attractive
    If I had a shell

    So I say to you from me
    Sideboob stands for liberty
    Will they drop you, will they, lobster girl

  • db||

    OMG WIN!

  • Brian Sorgatz||

    [takes a bow]

  • ||

    You should record that and then put it on Youtube.

  • Brian Sorgatz||

    My falsetto isn't strong enough. Somebody else should sing it for YouTube.

  • Rimfax||

    We are not worthy....

  • nobody||

    Matt, if you can reference LoneWacko each day for the next week you'll have won my $25. Promise. Sure, everyone here hates communists and Peter Singer, and yeah, that brings us together. But doesn't LW bring us together even more?

  • Rimfax||

    Is that you Ozymandias?

  • ||

    No, no, no.

    Brandy snifters! Handblown(?) by prison labor.

    Alright, then how about a selection of Lobster Girl items? Choose from coffee mugs, brandy snifters, Christmas tree ornaments, lobster bibs, or a commemorative 6-pack of Reason brand Lobster beer including an official Lobster Girl beer bong.

  • Sandi||

    Personal pre-moistened wipes would be nice.

  • db||

    I'm working up a Lobster Girl branded homebrew recipe after this. I'm thinking lots of Simcoe hops for for full grapefruit overtones.

  • JB||

    There is a Lobster Lover's beer:

    http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/12224/40176

    Saw it in the Mexican supermarket the other day.

  • Mad Max||

    Are they IllegalMexicanLobsters?

  • JB||

    How a beer from Lithuania ends up in the Mexican supermarket I do not know.

    I bought the werewolf beer (haven't tried it yet):

    http://community.livejournal.c.....32872.html

  • db||

    Those reviews are hilarious. Sounds like a real winner.

  • Alias||

    Don't like fake boobies.

  • ||

    Philistine!

  • Rimfax||

    Free market fake boobies to you, mister!

  • Steve Smith||

    I'll contribute something, but I better get a cruise to Alaska out of it.

  • Steve Smith||

    STEVE WANT TO RAPE POLAR BEAR. SEND STEVE ON CRUISE OR STEVE COME TO MATT WELCH OFFICE AND SMASH!

  • creech||

    Them thars hamsters, not mice.
    Anyway, thanks for LobsterGirl. I seem to recall a BeerGirl, too. If you dig her up and post her, then you get your contribution.

  • ||

    i want to eat that

  • db||

    Lobster Girl (to the tune of "Rebel Girl" by Bikini Kill)

    That girl thinks she's the queen of the Hit 'n' Run
    She loves her a crustecean
    That girl she holds the lobster up so high
    I think I wanna photograph her, yeah

    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    Lobster Girl you are the queen of Reason
    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    I think I will subscribe right now
    I'll donate a c-note, oh

    When she shows, the sideboob quiets us
    Soothes our cares, diverts our minds away
    Away from wars, bailouts and politicians
    In her kiss, I taste the revolution

    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    Lobster Girl you are the queen of Reason
    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    I think I will subscribe right now
    I'll donate a c-note, oh

    That girl thinks she's the queen of the Hit 'n' Run
    It's not news to us, she is!
    Some say they are fake but I know
    She is our inspiration, yeah

    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    Lobster Girl you are the queen of Reason
    Lobster Girl, Lobster Girl
    I think I will subscribe right now
    I'll donate a c-note, oh

    Love me like a lobster always
    Reason mascot, Lobster Girl
    Come and comment, our muse
    Will you, Lobster Girl?
    We really like you
    We really want to be your best friends
    Be our Lobster Girl

  • ||

    Well, out of respect for Reason, I won't link to it, but Lobster Girl has been posted elsewhere.

  • ||

    yeah, but this is original lobster girl and I'm sure the resolution is better...

  • ||

    I'm only doing this to save lobster girl and so when joe's dreams of hope and change are dashed, he'll have some place to come back and cry.

  • ||

    In an unnamed thread, I revealed to the world the photographer of Lobster Girl aka the Weibskobold.

  • db||

    Note to the moderator:

    Post #1452858, while free of relevant or interesting content, was in fact not spam.

  • ||

    I don't want to rain on Reason's attempt to blackmail people into donating.

  • ||

    Promise to make Lobstah Gurl's sideboob into airbrushed bare boob as soon as you hit 500 donors, and you'd be there right quick.

    And, P.S., any with an IQ above room temp can post a link to lobster girl without your help, thanks:

    http://images.google.com/image.....mp;ndsp=21

  • Art-P.O.G.||

    #5 on the image search is classic.

  • JB||

  • nobody||

    If we can save LobsterGirl I think we should have a celebratory Reason meetup in Colombia. She'll welcome us like heroes. There will be kisses.

  • JB||

    I would even let her kiss my barnacles.

  • Robert Stacy McCain||

    1. Throw parties with open bar.
    2. Invite me.
    3. Experience desperate financial straits.

    Matt, I love your business model. Don't change a thing!

  • ||

    Can someone give me a link to the mice in high heels pic? Can't find it on google.

  • ||

    http://www.tineye.com

    this will give you several

  • ||

    Wow, what a cool app! Thanks!

  • ||

    Wait until the ASPCA hears about this! That sort of behavior could scar a young crustacean for life and they live a loooong time. So just to be safe you should hire me as his stunt double..

  • ||

    Now, if Reason could set something up for me with Lobster Girl that would be one thing, but as it is, I'm going to be 55 and majorly unemployed come March and I fully expect my paltry retirement fund (in company stock) to have dwindled to nearly nothing by then.

  • ||

    I have to salute Matt Welch and the other kids at Reason... it's one thing to write for some of these fucktards, but another thing entirely to ask them out for a drink.

  • ||

    You guys ought to be charging for comments!

  • wwexxx||

    U MOTHERFUCKING RAT.SON OF A BITCH SLUT WHORE.

  • wizard of oz books||

    With many new announcement about the wizard of oz movies in the news, you might want to consider starting to obtain Wizard of Oz book series either as collectible or investment at RareOzBooks.com.

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