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Super Size Me...To Life!
When we
last checked in on gargantuan Death Row
inmate Richard Cooey, the 5-foot, 7-inch, 267-pound
criminal was trying to stay his execution in Ohio on the grounds
that he was too fat to fry (well, lethally inject).
Bad news for Cooey, who was sentenced to death for his role in a 1986 double kidnapping, beating, sexual assault and murder: The courts turned down his arguments that he is too obese to be put down by the state in a humane fashion and he will be executed today.
Cooey's lawyers pointed to what they called a history of botched executions by the state:
The last Ohio inmate to be executed was Christopher Newton—who was similar in size to Cooey—in May 2007. The execution team had trouble putting IVs in his arm, delaying his execution nearly two hours. There were similar problems in the execution of another inmate in 2006.
I'm against the death penalty because I think the state should use the least amount of force necessary to protect its citizens. But Cooey's case, in which there is no doubt of his guilt and a huge heaping serving of chutzpah, is the sort of plea that makes it difficult to argue against executions.
Cooey's last dinner?:
Cooey dined Monday evening on the special meal he ordered, including T-bone steak with A-1 sauce, onion rings, french fries, four eggs over easy, toast with butter, hash browns, a pint of rocky road ice cream, a Mountain Dew soft drink and bear claw pastries.
|10.14.08 @ 9:04AM|#
Force-feed him to death. Would that be cruel and unusual?
Probably. But then they could make foie gras out of his liver and
serve it with a nice Chianti.
More seriously, how is an inmate allowed to get that fat? Isn't
their diet controlled? If they had just put him on a reasonable
caloric restriction this wouldn't even be an issue.
David Rollins|10.14.08 @ 9:05AM|#
Can you send back your last meal? I'm imagining some passive
agressive prison chef serving you fries that have been sitting
under a heat lamp too long, with tabasco instead of my preferred
Texas Pete.
Myself, it would be foie gras flambe -- pretty hard to screw that
one up.
BakedPenguin|10.14.08 @ 9:33AM|#
...Cooey's case, in which there is no doubt of his
guilt and a huge heaping serving of chutzpah, is the sort
of plea that makes it difficult to argue against executions.
(emphasis added)
The fact that there are so many cases where there is doubt
of the person's guilt makes it easy to argue against the death
penalty. But yeah, I won't be crying for fatass.
|10.14.08 @ 9:39AM|#
Only someone that guilty could order that much food for a last meal. That's a fuckLot of food. Gawrsh I'm hungry.
JP|10.14.08 @ 9:39AM|#
Call me an old fart, but I find Reason's joking about
the state's ultimate use of force (even against an undoubtedly
guilty murderer) somewhat disturbing.
(I have no problem with commenters making whatever jokes they
want.)
|10.14.08 @ 9:40AM|#
Cooey dined Monday evening on the special meal he ordered, including T-bone steak with A-1 sauce, onion rings, french fries, four eggs over easy, toast with butter, hash browns, a pint of rocky road ice cream, a Mountain Dew soft drink and bear claw pastries.
No deep-fried bacon dogs?
Did they let him smoke two packs of unfiltered Pall Malls
afterward?
Fatty|10.14.08 @ 9:47AM|#
"...Cooey's case, in which there is no doubt of his guilt
and a huge heaping serving of chutzpah, is the sort of plea that
makes it difficult to argue against executions."
BakedPenguin already said it, basically, but I oppose the death
penalty on the basis that even the most remote risk of the state
killing -- or even being in a position where they ever could kill
-- an innocent human is unacceptable. The fact is that more than a
couple of innocent men have been executed, and one is too
many.
I shed no tears for this fat bastard, and I'm quite sure the human
race is better off without him. But, for me, it's never been a
question of whether or not some people "deserve" to die. It's a
matter of the state acknowledging its own limitations, and
inability to establish guilt in an absolute way.
In that light, it becomes a matter, for me, of a right-sized state
being one that knows it cannot determine who gets to live or
die.
|10.14.08 @ 10:05AM|#
Here is where the really anti-DP crowd and I split ways. I oppose DP on principle and want to eliminate it on principle. The militant nut-jobs oppose it on morality and want to eliminate it however they can, including piecemail. "Well, that guy's too smart. That guy's too dumb. That guy's too fat. That guy's too old. That guy found Jesus." Doing it that way is a)intellectually dishonest and b) means that the only guy left that it's okay to execute is me.
Kreel Sarloo|10.14.08 @ 10:08AM|#
Did they let him smoke two packs of unfiltered Pall Malls
afterward?
Of course not. Cigarettes are bad for you.
|10.14.08 @ 10:10AM|#
One of his victims had bruised and bloody hands from where she tried to fight them off. I can still picture the victims Fiero with its smashed windshield from the rock they dropped from the overpass to get them to pull over. He showed no remorse when his victims were pleading for their lives. Let the Mammoth die!
Alan Vanneman|10.14.08 @ 10:18AM|#
Nick, Nick, bo-bick, oops, wrong post. Hell, fry the bastard and watch him sizzle. Death ain't supposed to be pretty.
chuck goolsbee|10.14.08 @ 10:24AM|#
Ah, the Mitchell Rupe Strategy.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitchell_Rupe
|10.14.08 @ 10:27AM|#
The biggest pussies are those that egg on and cheerlead state murder. They are real tough guys.
|10.14.08 @ 10:33AM|#
"The biggest pussies are those that egg on and cheerlead
state murder. They are real tough guys."
Bigger pussies than the guy who rapes and murders a pair of 20
year-old girls?
|10.14.08 @ 10:35AM|#
As far as Super Size Me goes, this guy does show a certain resemblance to both Morgan Spurlock and the anti-Spurlock Radley Balko.
|10.14.08 @ 10:38AM|#
this guy does show a certain resemblance to both Morgan
Spurlock and the anti-Spurlock Radley Balko.
Maybe he ate them both.
|10.14.08 @ 10:43AM|#
"Evil done in the name of Caesar is always
worse."
OK, but being evil != being a pussy (except, of course,
Danzig).
In my opinion, he who intentionally murders another forfeits his
life. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
|10.14.08 @ 10:50AM|#
OK, but being evil != being a pussy (except, of course,
Danzig).
"Now look, you listen to me as hard as you fucking can. That
fucking robot came with the fucking house, and now he's fucking
gone! If you see that mother--"
"Oh, don't worry, we'll tell you!"
"You fucking better. If I find out he's over here, I'm gonna be
eating my cereal out of the bottom of your fucking skull!
Verstandlich?!?"
|10.14.08 @ 10:56AM|#
Well said Lamar. The brutality of the crime it seems in these cases is too often eclipsed by the BS surrounding the execution. What about victims and the families of the victims whose lives have been torn apart for the last 20 yrs? No one is making this big a stink about the victims. Being 270 lbs and 5'7" when you are on a tax payers menu and then claiming you can't pay for your crime? Laughable attempt to make a mockery out of our justice system.
ed|10.14.08 @ 11:03AM|#
Cooey dined on T-bone steak, onion rings, french fries, four
eggs over easy, toast with butter, hash browns, a pint of rocky
road ice cream...
A man who eats like that has a death wish.
|10.14.08 @ 11:06AM|#
I love that quote, because he's eating cereal.
Exactly. A subtle little touch that makes it brilliant.
"I cannot stand that guy. He is so annoying, he is so frightening,
and he doesn't wear a shirt."
"You make our house bleed right now!"
Gilbert Martin|10.14.08 @ 11:19AM|#
"the 5-foot, 7-inch, 267-pound criminal was trying to stay his
execution in Ohio on the grounds that he was too fat to fry (well,
lethally inject)."
Well they could always execute him by firing squad. Bullets work
just as well on fat people as they do thin ones.
Kelley|10.14.08 @ 12:40PM|#
RIGHT and those girls were TOO YOUNG TO DIE. BEG FOR MERCY LIKE THOSE POOR GIRLS DID. YOU DESERVED EVERY MOMENT OF THAT INJECTION!!!!!!!!!
|10.14.08 @ 1:30PM|#
I don't think he deserved a last meal he had stuffed himself
with enough tax payers money
His victims didn't have a choice of a last meal or a chance to be
with there family before he killed them
roll on the next execution
Sam Grove|10.14.08 @ 1:45PM|#
They could remove most of his intestines and let him eat all he
wants while starving to death.
I have an idea for an execution method: A chemically impelled bar
that will sever the spinal cord at the base of the skull.
The state is so conservative, where is the innovation?
Jennifer|10.14.08 @ 2:26PM|#
I have no philosophical objection to the death penalty for
murderers; my only complaint against it is that the state
all-too-often makes mistakes. But this sociopathic lardass actually
was guilty, and the world is richer for his loss.
Now that he's dead, I return to my regularly scheduled opposition
to the death penalty.
Robert|10.14.08 @ 2:59PM|#
I have an idea for an execution method: A chemically
impelled bar that will sever the spinal cord at the base of the
skull.
How about putting him in one of those machines that stamps out car
fenders. It's cruel and unusual only for the guy that has to clean
it up.
Andy|10.14.08 @ 6:12PM|#
Seriously, only like one statement of what your last meal would
be? I'm surprised...
I favor torture sometimes, i just don't think it should be legal.
You know, like underage drinking. Sometimes, some people decide
they gotta do it.
|10.16.08 @ 12:15PM|#
fat fuck. can you imagine the mess in his pants after that
gargantuan last meal?
LOL @ matt
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