Remy: $20 Trillion Reasons (Lady Gaga Parody)

There are 20 trillion reasons we should rein in government spending.

1x 1.1x 1.25x 1.5x 2x 3x

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Remy: $20 Trillion Reasons (Lady Gaga Parody)

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Remy tries his best to explain why the nation's debt is reason enough to curtail government spending.

Lady Gaga parody written and performed by Remy
Music tracks and background vocals by Ben Karlstrom
Video by Meredith Bragg

LYRICS:
Why can't we buy these tanks the Army says they don't need
Why can't we buy these solar-powered abortion machines
Uh, sir, there's 20 trillion reasons
You have 20 trillion reasons
We got 20 trillion reasons
About 20 trillion reasons

Why can't we build a border wall that touches the skies
Stay on our momma's healthcare until we're 45
We got 20 trillion reasons
You have 20 trillion reasons
We got 20 trillion reasons
About 20 trillion reasons

We took centuries
to reach 10, now I fear we're gleaning
Debt is like this guy
it should be nowhere near the teens and
now we've got about 20 trillion reasons to stop today
But maybe if we just spend one more we'll stay

Twenty trillion dollars stacked together just might reach to the sun
Uh, so
It could even last Johnny Depp for over a month
Dear God
We got 20 trillion reasons
They got 20 trillion reasons
You have 20 trillions reasons
We have 20 trillion reasons

Could we pay off the tab by buying unneeded jets
Or just identify as being not that in debt
We'd still have 20 trillion reasons

Still the 20 trillion reasons
Still have 20 trillion reasons
Over 20 trillion reasons

I've paid social security since I was first hired
Will that program still exist on the day I retire

I forgot my car
It's parked in the two hour parking
Lord, show me the way
I think I hear my third wife carping
I got a pot of sauce I left on the oven range

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

The flaw in this one is that there is no one testifying to Congress that we're spending our way into collapse.

[mad.casual]

It's like you've never even seen a music video.

[pan fried wylie]

There was definitely a gap between MTV and YouTube.

[mad.casual]

I'd probably donate to a Reason Magazine that produced "$20 Trillion Reasons" A Remy parody feat. Pras, Mya, & Ol' Dirty Bastard.

[TrickyVic (old school)]

I got 20 Trillion problems but debt repayment isn't one of them.

[Reality]

Hey Remy, you're terrible.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I agree. There's no excuse for putting Wiener on my computer screen

[Charles Easterly]

Is that an attempt to summon SugarFree?

[SQRLSY One]

I'd say "Let's roast some Wiener", but Wiener doesn't look too appetizing right now...

I guess I'll just roast some marshmallows and leave it at that...

[SQRLSY One]

Sorry, guys, there's just NOTHING left to cut, NOTHING at ALL!!!

(I am thinking, if we cut down the budget of the Department of Shooting Your Dogs, utter PANDEMONIUM might result!)

[Eric Bana]

Didn't Pelosi literally say that several years ago? THE CUPBOARDS ARE BARE!!!

[lap83]

+1 old mother Hubbard

[pan fried wylie]

Yet nobody asked why the gov't even HAS cupboards.

[CatoTheChipper]

"The cupboard is bare. There's no more cuts to make. It's really important that people understand that," Mrs. Pelosi, California Democrat, said in an interview broadcast Sunday on CNN's "State of the Union."

"We cannot have cuts just for the sake of cuts."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEmCNrNW77I

[AlmightyJB]

"solar-powered abortion machines"

Lol

[Libertarian]

Funny? Trump has talked of a solar powered wall. We're deep into Poe's law.

[Square = Circle]

I prefer my good-old-fashioned gasoline-powered walls, thank you.

[AlmightyJB]

I mean if you're going to have a southern gaming wall, you may as well take advantage of using solar to power your death ray guns.

[SQRLSY One]

A liposuction-powered abortion machine would be even better! The Lard-Lord knows I've got some excess fat cells to spare...

Obese ladies who accidentally get preggers could solve 2 problems at once...

Also a liposuction-powered automobile would be GREAT! In the hippie days, they said,

"Grass, gas, or ass; NO ONE rides for FREE!"

I could hitch a ride while losing some weight! Great!

[pan fried wylie]

could solve 2 problems at once...

I think it'd still take two appointments so there's time for the lipids to get transesterized before they can run the generator. You don't want an abortion powered by someone else's fatass, do you?

[Square = Circle]

+1 Fight Club

[mad.casual]

-1 Talking about it.
-1 Talking about it.

+1 Paper Street Soap Co.

[Domestic Dissident]

Wonderful! My alternate title: "The Block Yomomma Song".

[$park? leftist poser]

Block Yomamma
Block Block Yomamma
I said
Block Yomamma
Block Block Yomamma

[Palin's Buttplug]

Your Bushpigs left Obama a $1.3 trillion annual deficit and a shit-fucked economy after larding up on DHS, TSA, Medicare Welfare Part D, Iraq War clusterfuck, and other Big Gov programs.

Yet idiots like you think the GOP is "small government".

[$park? leftist poser]

Suck your Bushpigs
Suck suck your Bushpigs
I said
Suck your Bushpigs
Suck suck your Bushpigs

[TrickyVic (old school)]

""Your Bushpigs left Obama a $1.3 trillion annual deficit""

I believe the Dems held both houses of Congress from 2006 - 2010. The Dems voted for it.

""Medicare Welfare Part D,""

That's hilarious. Opposed to Medicare Welfare Parts A and B?

[TrickyVic (old school)]

The 20T debt is very much a bipartisan fault.

[Palin's Buttplug]

The 20T debt is very much a bipartisan fault.

Holy shit! One of the Peanuts is xcaping the GOP Plantation!

GIT HIM!

[TrickyVic (old school)]

Being I've never been on that plantation, you have me confused with another peanut.

[ChipToBeSquare]

He's a house peanut

[Palin's Buttplug]

Didn't Mr. Peanut wear a tophat and monocle?

[ChipToBeSquare]

Shoot, Mr. Peanut might just be a libertarian

[mad.casual]

Shoot, Mr. Peanut might just be a libertarian

Extended pinky, spats, top hat, monocle, white gloves, and nothing else? Libertarian credentials are looking... pretty good. It's a near certainty that he's a Reason forumite.

[Sevo]

Palin's Buttplug|8.3.17 @ 3:24PM|#
"Didn't Mr. Peanut wear a tophat and monocle?"

Fuck off, turd.

[Enjoy Every Sandwich]

How much of that stuff did your precious Hillary vote for?

[Palin's Buttplug]

Lots, but fuck Hillary.

I only wanted her as POTUS to perpetuate gridlock.*

*gridlock being our best chance of long-term survival

[TrickyVic (old school)]

What better way to have gridlock than having a POTUS that neither party wants to deal with?

[Palin's Buttplug]

Well, I have been mildly surprised at how ineffective Trump has been.

The GOP Congress hasn't sent him much to sign for sure. Maybe they learned from the last time the GOP owned Government (2003-2007).

[Domestic Dissident]

Fuck you and your god-damned whore mother Weigel. You love welfare and big government spending!

[Palin's Buttplug]

Tell us how the GOP is all-in for small government, Simple Mikey (nice nickname btw - but Mendacious Cuck Mickey would fit better).

[Domestic Dissident]

The fake republicans in congress like John McCain and Susan Collins are just as much of a bunch of completely worthless scumbags as you are.

Now pleased go get Seth Rich'ed already you piece of crap.

[Citizen X - #6]

Blue Mikey and Red Shreek found a dead possum in the ditch behind their special school, and now they're hooting and flailing as they fight over who gets to finger its butthole first.

[Eek Barba Durkle]

They was fixin to molt. You ruint it.

[Telcontar the Wanderer]

FTR, I totally just read that in Ron Burgundy's voice.

[DesigNate]

An annual deficit that Obama and the Dems made the new baseline of spending for the next four years. And let's not forget that demfags like you and Tony wailed and gnashed your teeth when the government shut down for a whole week (or however long it was). Let's also not forget that Obama took that 10Trillion in debt and ballooned it to 20Trillion.

Now, please call me a peanut and a GOP apologists for pointing out how shitty Obama was, all while ignoring my previous contempt for Bush and his taking us from 5Trillion to 10Trillion.

[Palin's Buttplug]

Bullshit.

The "baseline" began when the new GOP spending programs kicked in.

[DesigNate]

You are so full of shit.

Total deficit spending in 2008 was $459BB.
Total deficit spending in 2009 was $1.413TT.
Total deficit spending in 2010 was $1.294TT.
Total deficit spending in 2011 was $1.30TT.
Total deficit spending in 2012 was $1.087TT.

Who controlled the House and the Senate from 2008 to 2010? Who still had control of the Senate from 2010 to 2012? What was passed by the House and the Senate in 2008 and 2009? Oh that's right, TARP and ARRA.

You would think a classical liberal such as yourself would hate bailouts of banks and other big businesses at the expense of the common man for an entire generation.

[Palin's Buttplug]

Idiot! You are looking at the RESULTS of the GOP Spending programs!

[NotAnotherSkippy]

You mean during the period that the socialists controlled congress for 4 years, both houses (supermajority in the senate) and the presidency for 2 of those years, and then the senate and presidency for the remaining 2? All of those "GOP" spending programs?

Serious question: have you ever argued anything successfully in your life?

[Sevo]

"Serious question: have you ever argued anything successfully in your life?"

Not here.
And he lost that bet to our So Cal commenter and never paid.
He's a liar, an imbecile AND a cretin!

[dave b.]

*Rein* in spending. Is there an editor at this place?

[Citizen X - #6]

"Reigning in government spending" is a pretty good description of both parties' ideologies, no?

[mad.casual]

Reign, rein, rain... it all works.

[$park? leftist poser]

It's like reign on your wedding day

[mad.casual]

I pity your political party-themed wedding.

[Libertarian]

Whoa. I think you're beating a dead horse.

[Zeb]

Probably towing a lion too.

[Libertarian]

I'd like to get in front of Congress, show them that hockey stick chart, and ask them just how much longer they expect this to last.

In fact, I just had an idea: we should have a national lottery to randomly pick a different American each week to address Congress for 60 minutes on any subject of their choice. What's the worst that could happen?

[OBJ FRANKELSON]

According to a Vassar/U. of Chicago educated friend of mine that worked in debt management in Treasury, forever. I had a very long chat with him where I tried to get him to put a rough number on what was the highest sustainable Debt/GDP metric or the highest percentage of the budget can be debt service. I never got a straight answer, his position was, more or less, since we were the world's reserve currency none of that mattered and the Fed playing shell games backed with bond purchases will has had no effect. I was gobsmacked.

[ChipToBeSquare]

Cutting spending is great, but let's not pretend we have a shot in hell at paying off a 20 trillion dollar debt. We're defaulting on that sucker sooner or later

[TrickyVic (old school)]

Yeah. How long would it take to pay off the 20T, if we paid triple the interest yearly? And that's not gonna happen.

I don't think we pay any money on the principle amount.

[Square = Circle]

Once our currency is as valuable at Zimbabwe's, we'll pay it off in yuans.

[mad.casual]

Fuck You, Cut Spending.

Seriously, show me in the Constitution where it says the government can't default on it's debt once and I'll show you, right below it, where it doesn't say it can't default twice.

[Sevo]

You can't parody Lady Gaga; she beat you to it.

[Tony]

Seriously though, what do you do for fun? I already know it involves used tires and blowtorches, but what do you do with them exactly?

[Zeb]

Well, that's a stupid question.

[Sevo]

"Well, that's a stupid question."

It's Tony: no reason to expect otherwise.

[Sevo]

Tony|8.3.17 @ 3:41PM|#"
"Seriously though, what do you do for fun?"

I know this is beyond your understanding:
I THINK.

[Tony]

Sweetie, you're wasting your gum.

[Tony]

One starts to think that you guys actually believe what used to be rather obvious Norquistian propaganda.The deficit is the biggest problem in the world, but we can't ever ever raise taxes? What kind of moron actually buys this shit? Four year-olds come up with more sophisticated gambits to get what they want.

Yet here I am, among people who sat through adult years watching taxes get cut by the trillions, claiming presumably with real conviction that debt and deficit are a looming catastrophe, but we can't actually raise revenues to prevent that catastrophe, because... hey, look a squirrel!

Unless you're all, to a person, lying assholes who are playing the same game Norquist does. In which case, fuck you, assholes.

[Zeb]

Federal tax revenues went up almost every year in the 80s and 90s and every year since 2004.

So where did these trillions in tax cuts happen? Do you actually believe that if tax rates were the same as in the 70s that federal revenues would be trillions of dollars higher?

[Tony]

Are you suggesting that revenues have no correlation to tax rates?

There's a reason even Republicans used to call this voodoo.

"The non-partisan Congressional Research Service has estimated the 10-year revenue loss from extending the 2001 and 2003 tax cuts beyond 2010 at $2.9 trillion, with an additional $606 billion in debt service costs (interest), for a combined total of $3.5 trillion." -Wikipedia

The cuts were cut then eventually restored under Obama, so trillions is correct.

[Square = Circle]

You may have heard the phrase "Fuck You, Cut Spending" bandied about here and there. Do you understand why?

[Eek Barba Durkle]

lulz

His comment is literally rebutted by the most common phrase in this comment section, for many years.

[Tony]

Because you don't actually care about the debt but are instead interested in enacting an ideological policy agenda, but since so few Americans actually want what you're selling, you have to lie about how the debt is a looming catastrophe and then hope that people are too dumb to ask why you can't raise any revenues to help deal with it?

[Sevo]

Fuck off, shitbag.

[BeBraveUSA]

When I hear the words "bi-partisan" coming from Tony and his liberal comrades I reach for the lube cuz I know I'm about to get screwed.

[DesigNate]

Tony is so fucking stupid, he can't tell the difference between deficits and debt.

And of course, if you cut taxes but don't cut spending, you're going to have a problem. That's probably why most commenters understand the saying "Fuck you, cut spending." But Tony, being a disingenous asshole completely ignores that.

The majority of the Bush "Tax cuts" went to the poor and middle class. Tony obviously hates the poor and middle class.

(Tax cuts are in quotes cause, as you pointed out, tax revenue went up every year from 1980 to 2000, took a dip down to 2003, climbed back up till 2009, and has been on the rise since. Oh, and the amount they took in in 2009 was STILL more than they took in 2004.)

[Square = Circle]

Look. History has shown time and again that if you fully fund governments, they will limit their own spending and stop incurring debt. I could probably think of, like, a million examples.

[Tony]

You have a very stupid definition of "majority," whatever it is.

Norquist of course advocated cutting taxes as a way of forcing the issue of cutting services. It never worked, thus deficits.

[Enjoy Every Sandwich]

And if they had raised taxes? You would have screamed for higher spending. Heck, you do that whether they raise taxes or not.

[Tony]

I just believe in plain old mainstream countercyclical economics. I'm not trying to swindle everyone into something like you people.

[Sevo]

Tony|8.3.17 @ 3:47PM|#
"One starts to think that you guys actually believe what used to be rather obvious Norquistian propaganda"

Shit bag, thought is beyond your abilities.
Take your tired whines and fuck off.

[shane_c]

Abortion cuts the crime rate and welfare which cost a lot so its a good thing and actually saves money.

[mad.casual]

Abortion cuts the crime rate

Do you get the robes and hood after joining or get the robes and hood first and then just show up to a meeting? Just curious.

[shane_c]

I don't know what would make YOU think of that. Its babies born to poor, young, unmarried girls - that can be anybody.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

"just identify as being not that in debt"

I like that.

[????? + ?????]

Nothing is impossible for science
http://egames-android.com/cooking-chef/

[XM]

I don't even know the song that's being parodied. Pop music is now dead.

[Eman]

Yeah, people have only been saying that, like, forever. Pop music , by definition, caters to the lot west common denominator, and always has and always will mostly suck. In hindsight we only remember the memorable stuff. In real time you have to go to a hundred shows to get one good one.

[gordo53]

The $20 trillion is the reason nobody in government is talking about fixing the debt and deficits. It's way too late. We have gone down the rat hole from which there is no escape. The only thing left to do is wait for the pending disaster, whatever it might be.

[CatoTheChipper]

A home run ... with bases loaded.

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