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Kinky Sex Survey Says: You're Not as Deviant as You Think

justin_case/Flickrjustin_case/FlickrBeing sexually dominated. Having sex with multiple people at once. Watching someone undress without their knowledge. These are just a few of the totally normal sexual fantasies uncovered by recent research published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. The overarching takeaway from this survey of about 1,500 Canadian adults is that sexual kink is incredibly common. 

While plenty of research has been conducted on sexual fetishes, less is known about the prevalence of particular sexual desires that don't rise to the level of pathological (i.e., don't harm others or interfere with normal life functioning and aren't a requisite for getting off). "Our main objective was to specify norms in sexual fantasies," said lead study author Christian Joyal. "We suspected there are a lot more common fantasies than atypical fantasies." 

Joyal's team surveyed about 717 Québécois men and 799 women, with a mean age of 30. Participants ranked 55 different sexual fantasies, as well as wrote in their own. Each fantasy was then rated as statistically rare, unusual, common, or typical. 

Rare fantasies: Only two of the 55 sexual fantasies—sex with children and sex with animals—were found to be rare, occurring in less than 2.3 percent of the survey population. 

Unusual fantasies: Nine fantasies were determined to be unusual: urinating on or being urinated on by a sexual partner, crossdressing, forcing someone to have sex, "sexually abusing a person who is drunk, asleep, or unconscious", watch two men have sex, being naked or partially naked in a public place, having sex with three or more men, and having sex with a stripper or prostitute. Less than 16 percent of all respondents said they fantasize about these things, although there were some notable gender differences. For instance, nearly a third of women have fantasized about having sex with three or more men, compared to 13 percent of men who've fantasized about it. Nearly 40 percent of men have fantasized about fucking a sex worker, compared to 12.5 percent of women. Men were also more likely to fantasize about forcing someone to have sex (22 percent versus 10.8 percent). 

Common/typical fantasies: Sexual scenarios that appealed to 50 percent or more of respondents were deemed common, and those that appealed to more than more than 84.1 percent of the sample were deemed typical. These included: 

  • Sex in "an unusual place (e.g., office, public toilets)": 82 percent women + 82 percent men
  • Having sex with two women: 37 percent women + 84.5 percent men
  • Watching two women have sex: 42 percent women + 82 percent men
  • Having sex with a stranger: 49 percent women + 72.5 percent men
  • Being dominated sexually: 65 percent women + 53 percent men
  • Dominating someone sexually: 47 percent women + 60 percent men
  • Being tied up during sexual activity: 52 percent women + 46 percent men
  • Having anal sex: 32.5 percent women + 64 percent men
  • Having sex with more than three women: 25 percent women + 75 percent men
  • Watching someone undress without them knowing: 32 percent women + 63 percent men
  • Having sex with more than three people, including men and women: 56.5 percent women + 16 percent men

Sexual fantasies that fell short of being "common" but weren't rare enough to be considered unusual included: 

  • Being photographed or filmed during sex: 32 percent women + 44 percent men
  • Being ejaculated on by a partner: 41 percent women + 29 percent men
  • Having sex with someone much younger: 18 percent women + 57 percent men
  • Spanking or whipping someone "to obtain sexual pleasure": 24 percent women + 43.5 percent men
  • Being spanked or whipped: 36 percent women + 28.5 percent men 
  • Being forced to have sex: 29 percent women + 31 percent men
  • Having sex with a fetish or non-sexual object: 26 percent women + 28 percent men

Notably, men were more likely than women to say they wanted their sexual fantasies to become sexual realities. "Approximately half of women with descriptions of submissive fantasies specified that they would not want the fantasy to materialize in real life," the researchers note. "This result confirms the important distinction between sexual fantasies and sexual wishes, which is usually stronger among women than among men." 

The researchers also found a number of write-in "favorite" sexual fantasies that were common among men had no equivalent in women's fantasies. These included having sex with a trans woman (included in 4.2 percent of write-in fantasies), being on the receiving end of strap-on/non-homosexual anal sex (6.1 percent), and watching a partner have sex with another man (8.4 percent).

Next up, the researchers plan to map subgroups of sexual fantasies that often go together (for instance, those who reported submissive fantasies were also more likely to report domination fantasies, and both were associated with higher levels of overall sexual satisfaction). For now, they caution that "care should be taken before labeling (a sexual fantasy) as unusual, let alone deviant."  

Photo Credit: justin_case/Flickr

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  • ||

    Whoa, whoa, hold on. This study was done with Canadians. That like guarantees that the kink factor is going to be astronomical. Canadians are the most perverted people on the planet. No, no, none of this makes sense.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Not to mention that Nutrasweet alone skews the entire continent at least five or six points.

  • ||

    NutraSweet is the most Canadian American I've ever seen. I don't know how he lives with himself.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Kentucky is like Tennessee's Canada.

  • Catatafish||

    Strange that Tennessee's whiskey is such utter piss then...

  • Pro Libertate||

    You must be Canadian.

  • Catatafish||

    (Went to Louisville for law school)

  • Catatafish||

    Was in Nashville in August for a bachelor party and we rented a bus to take us out to Lynchburg for the tour. Actually had a fantastic time. Beautiful area. Great history. Facilities were incredible. Learned a lot.

    Then the tasting began and everything went sideways...

  • Pro Libertate||

    They produce their good and their bad. I'm more of a bourbon man myself, but Tennessee has some good stuff, too.

    In any case, Kentucky remains in all other respects Tennessee's Canada.

  • Catatafish||

    Being a Virginian by upbringing, I can tell you how much all my Kentucky friends appreciated it when I informed them "you could've been one of me but we just decided to let you all go."

    You know, the irony for me is the reason I think I dislike Jack is the charcoal process they tout so much (and it's very cool to see, I'll admit) strips out all the delicious things they call "impurities." I'm starting to explore all the Texas whiskeys but I still can't stray too far from my Buffalo Trace, Eagle Rare and Woodford Reserve.

    Speaking of, I'm awfully thirsty...

  • Pro Libertate||

    IT'S BOURBON TIME!

  • prolefeed||

    I've got Elijah Craig 12 and Knob Creek ... I've read yours are really good, too

  • Doghouse Riley Jr.||

    Even worse, these were all Quebecois.

  • Doghouse Riley Jr.||

    So there were probably a lot of poultine related responses that have been edited out.

  • ||

    And now I'm hungry.

  • AlmightyJB||

    Explains the lack of bacon related fantasies.

  • John||

    Canadians? They are perverts? Does that mean Dagny too? Not her.

  • ||

    Dagny is the biggest pervert of all.

  • Pro Libertate||

    What do you expect from a woman who grew up with Mounties? I mean, Mountie. It's in the name.

    What, no one ever questioned what, precisely, these cops were mounting? Have you never seen Dudley Do-Right?

  • Lord Humungus||

    and all the hockey fantasies... goalie masks... pads... big sticks.

  • Fist of Etiquette||

    And lots of apologies.

  • Catatafish||

    There just so considerate during their BDSM!

  • John Titor||

  • Tommy_Grand||

    public toilet? um, no + barf.

  • Winston||

    Reminds me of when I was in College my prof admitted that Kinsey's Report was highly flawed but hey he liked the results so it was good.

  • Paul.||

    Like Obamacare?

  • Overvalued||

    +1 Ends justifying

  • Knarf Yenrab!||

    Having sex with more than three people, including men and women: 56.5 percent women + 16 percent men

    Evolutionary psychologists look on in horror as their discipline collapses.

  • croaker||

    Evolutionary psychologists ignore our two closest relatives in the animal kingdom and their sexual habits. They've been irrelevant for centuries.

  • LynchPin1477||

    Having sex with more than three people, including men and women: 56.5 percent women + 16 percent men

    I'm surprised so many women and so few men fantasize about this. I wonder if the inclusion of even one other man is enough to turn most guys off? Depending on the exact wording, someone could interpret this in a variety of ways.

  • Elizabeth Nolan Brown||

    Well, 75 percent of men said they wanted sex with three or more women (compared to only 25 percent of women on this question), so yeah, I'd say the genders involved matter

  • Pro Libertate||

    Those 25 percent sound like very busy ladies, then.

  • LynchPin1477||

    It can be read in multiple ways. My first reaction was that it meant an orgy, but not necessarily one where a guy has to have sex with another guy. I'd expect more guys to have fantasized about that.

  • ||

    Yes, much closer to another dick than I would ever want to be. NTTAWWT

  • Cyto||

    One of my coworkers calls this the "one dick per fantasy" rule. As many female parts as you'd like, but just the one set of male parts.

  • LynchPin1477||

    "This result confirms the important distinction between sexual fantasies and sexual wishes, which is usually stronger among women than among men."

    Damn it. It was all good until I got to this part.

  • Ted S.||

    Having sex with a stranger: 49 percent women + 72.5 percent men

    Either 11.75 percent of the male population is gay, or women remember men they've met previously much better than the other way round. Or women just have a tighter definition of stranger.

  • Zeb||

    Erm. This is about fantasies, not actual practice.

  • AlmightyJB||

    I'm pretty surprised those numbers are that low, especially for men.

  • Rasilio||

    Again, it's what they fantasize about, not what they actually do.

  • Harvard||

    If more women were tighter they'd attract more strangers.

  • Rich||

    nearly a third of women have fantasized about having sex with three or more men, compared to 13 percent of men who've fantasized about it.

    Bullshit.

  • Knarf Yenrab!||

    That's for having sex with men. For three or more women, men are at 75%. Then it drops again if you have multiple partners of mixed sex.

  • Cyto||

    Apparently about 10% of men fail at taking surveys. As proof: they only report 85% of men fantasizing about watching two women. if 3-5% are gay, that means about 10% of the remaining men just answered that one wrong.

  • Careless||

    I'd be pretty surprised if one in seven men has fantasized about a 4+ guy orgy.

  • Apple||

    Why did they lump men and women together? If 57% of men fantasize about sex with a much younger partner, I wouldn't call it unusual, even if most women don't.

  • Apple||

    Okay, they didn't call it unusual, but I would think it ranks as common.

  • Zeb||

    I'd think so. But a man has to reach a certain age before having sex with a much younger partner is a non-pathological thing. Depending on what you mean by "much younger", of course.

  • AlmightyJB||

    I thought the low Stat for women on that was interesting given all the women teacher male student sex scandals.

  • Libertarian||

    This, as they say, is mandatory:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9srPr4Lc6k

  • Anonymous Coward||

    Mark it on your calendars. Avoid the movie theaters next Valentine's Day. You have been warned.

  • ||

    That's some quality female pornography. I think I'm getting wet.

  • ||

    Get the drip bucket!

  • Pro Libertate||

    I heard about that from a studio executive a couple of years ago, and I said, "You're fucking kidding me." And I'm not one to drop the F-bomb in a professional setting.

  • Careless||

    Why would one of the best-selling books of all time being turned into a movie get that response?

  • Rasilio||

    Especially given that it should cost them about $6.37 more than the cost of the actors salaries to shoot the damn thing

  • croaker||

    Feh. Don't know why they're making a big deal out of this. Half the bodice rippers on the market today are more intense and more explicit.

  • The_Millenial||

    ENB, is this your new beat? After all, I remember you mentioning 'orgies' in the political identity survey comments thread last week.

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    She has to be little kinky. Probably been to the upper floor.

  • The Original Jason||

    Nah, they put her on this beat because the liberals will tell you that sex is a "women's issue", after all...

  • Palin's Buttplug||

    I'm finally with the majority on something.

  • The_Millenial||

    You like being publicly whipped or spanked?

  • Vulgar Madman||

    Nah, he just likes to think he's unique. He is special though.

  • The_Millenial||

    I was just curious since it seems to happen a lot to PB in the comment threads.

  • Vulgar Madman||

    He's only into that, if it's soros.

  • croaker||

    Soros? I want to see Eric Holder strapped to a St Andrew's Cross and flogged around the flagpole.

  • The Original Jason||

    He likes to be stuck up people's asses head first...

  • GILMORE||

    Look, studies are nice and all... BUT:

    I still don't understand why there's Granny-porn out there

  • The_Millenial||

    Why is there scat porn??? Far more disgusting. Fetishes are fine and all, but come on.

  • Zeb||

    Yeah, I find granny porn a lot more understandable than scat porn.

  • gaoxiaen||

    That's because you never had a Cleveland Steamer or Pittsburgh Platter.

  • ||

    RULE 34

  • GILMORE||

    yes... ok. But I don't understands why it *exists*. It runs counter to basic biological assumptions = older is always *worse*

    Not only that, but its not even as obscure and buried in shame as it *well should be*. To my mind, its as bizarre as (*as bo notes) scat-fetish, yet you have to skip past Granny porns on the tubes all the time. Its not just 'existing', its 'prevalent'. I put it in a category as bizarre and fucked up as 'crush films'... and I note: Its not even mentioned in the copious list above *at all*.

    I think some comedian brought this to my attention when he suggested there be an online petition to remove all Fatty and Granny porn from the major porn tubes. He was like, 'it kills my boner knowing those people are somewhere out there'

  • Zeb||

    Biological assumptions would also tell us that anal sex is pointless, as is ejaculating on people's faces or asses rather than inside where it is meant to be.

    I'm certainly not a fan of granny porn, but there are loads of way weirder things out there that aren't all that weird.

  • croaker||

    There are people who get off on watching horses breed. No accounting for taste.

  • The Original Jason||

    If there's no granny porn, how will grandpa get off?

  • Careless||

    naked 22 year olds, like everyone else.

  • Careless||

    I'm not going to say I've never encountered it, but far less often than you claim to.

    You're looking for born in the wrong places.

  • Knarf Yenrab!||

    Psychologists have known how to create sexual fetishes for a while with operant conditioning. You can even select and then purposefully create your own sexual fetishes if that's an appealing thought.

    I suspect the emergence of granny porn has to do with the growing elderly population. With so many geezers running around, young men today are more likely to see an old person in one context or another immediately before masturbating, thus the granny fetish.

  • The Laconic||

    Something something rape culture something something patriarchy.

  • Lord Humungus||

    The researchers also found a number of write-in "favorite" sexual fantasies that were common among men had no equivalent in women's fantasies. These included having sex with a trans woman (included in 4.2 percent of write-in fantasies), being on the receiving end of strap-on/non-homosexual anal sex (6.1 percent), and watching a partner have sex with another man (8.4 percent).

    Where does the hotwife category fall into this?

  • Pro Libertate||

    You know, maybe we should be conquered by aliens. Or robots. Or alien robots. Or even robots that were originally from here but reprogrammed and enhanced by aliens.

  • The_Millenial||

    This is rich coming from some guy who has probably fantasized about alien robots dominating him.

  • Pro Libertate||

    Strangely, no.

  • The_Millenial||

    I don't believe you...

  • Pro Libertate||

    It's just not my oeuvre.

  • Rasilio||

    Former sex bots liberated and reprogrammed for combat to get revenge for all the indignities they had to endure by aliens

  • mkreitler||

    +1 Zhora

  • Lord Humungus||

    I have a friend who had some gift of convincing women he knew to strip for him while he clicked away with a camera. This was pre-internet/digital cameras so getting the film developed - he was no pro - was always a hassle. But I got to see the evidence of his er, particular hobby.

  • Zeb||

    I'd imagine that was an easier sell before digital cameras. Though maybe not, given the dumb shit people put online.
    That was one of the best things about Polaroids. You could convincingly claim that no one else will ever see the pictures, or at least that there aren't multiple copies.

  • Cyto||

    Actually I have heard the opposite. Apparently a large percentage of young women are just dying for the chance to have someone snap naked pictures. About 10-12 years ago young coworker of mine carried a digital camera everywhere just for the occasion. He'd succeed in convincing a young lady or two pretty much every weekend.

    Things might have changed since the exposure of revenge porn, but he was certainly very successful with it.

  • Rasilio||

    Thing is revenge porn only works if you are actually embarrassed/ashamed by it.

    Girls who that willingly do porn shoots for near complete strangers probably don't give a damn where the pictures end up or who see's them.

  • John Titor||

    Aww, no questions about Godzilla bukkake, surgically made tentacle penises or saline testicle enlargement? So alone...

  • Overvalued||

    How in the (not deviant) fuck did I end up on Salon here?? Gotta stop drinking in the afternoon...

  • Warren's Strapon||

    I'm pretty sure I've ejaculated on more than 41% of my partners. Sorry, ladies.

  • AlmightyJB||

    "You're not as deviant as you think"

    And that is where you are wrong:)

  • Res ipsa loquitur||

    ...truth

  • Knarf Yenrab!||

    Were there not any write-ins for black-and-gold bow-tie fetishes? What's wrong with Canadians?

  • Rasilio||

    "Rare fantasies: Only two of the 55 sexual fantasies—sex with children and sex with animals—were found to be rare, occurring in less than 2.3 percent of the survey population. "

    Anyone wanna bet that these numbers are seriously low? It is a pretty safe bet that the majority of the people who have these fantasies would never under any circumstances admit it, even in private to themselves. You probably also get a lot of rationalization over just what constitutes a "child" for purposes of the question.

  • Alan||

    Doubtless low. Evidence I've seen over the years is that at least 2% of people actually participate with animals some time in their lives, and there have been many societies where sex with under-12s was (or is) common - so I'm not believing those numbers.

  • Careless||

    I know some people have sex with animals, but do they typically fantasize about it?

    As for the sex with children thing, it probably depends on what you're defining as a child.

  • Marty Feldman's Eyes||

    Notably, men were more likely than women to say they wanted their sexual fantasies to become sexual realities.

    "This result confirms the important distinction between sexual fantasies and sexual wishes, which is usually stronger among women than among men."

    Revealed Preference rears it's ugly head. You get us reading all this interesting stuff, then clobber us with the reality that it ain't gonna happen.

  • ellendempseyivy||

    my roomate's sister-in-law makes $84 an hour on the laptop . She has been out of a job for nine months but last month her paycheck was $13998 just working on the laptop for a few hours. pop over here....

    ======= www.payinsider.com

  • Alan||

    So, your roommate's sister-in-law is a lap dancer, making $84 an hour on lap tops?

    Well, at least your comment was on topic, though I fail to see the point.

  • userve32||

    Its only Rock and Roll to me.

    www.anon-way.tk

  • Harvard||

    Nothing really horrifying about these fantasies anyway. Like fucking a humpback. Or Warty.

  • SimonJester||

    I wonder how, or if, they controled how aroused a person was when they did this study. The more aroused a person becomes they more willing s/he is to approve of some sexual acts, that seems obvious. Were the questions randomized to control for this?

    Also, according to the link, this was an internet study. I assume this means that at least SOME of them are going to google/bing the sex acts when they are mentioned. "I don't know if I would like that, let me go and see what it looks like!" If this is happening, then the first couple of results would strongly influence the study. Even controling what the thumbnail looks like could have a strong ipact on the study.

    Finally, this doesn't take sexuality or experience into play. A 30-year-old virgin (particularly one who is a virgin for non-religious reasons) and porn "addict," for example, will probably rate this differently than a 30-year-old "player" who has been having sex (even vanilla sex) since 16.

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