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Inequality

The Marriage Gap Is America's Most Overlooked Source of Inequality

Every dollar of well-intentioned government assistance comes with a behavioral price tag that we've largely refused to count.

Veronique de Rugy | 4.30.2026 1:25 PM

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A married couple walk into the distance as cash falls underneath them | Illustration: Lex Villena; Midjourney
(Illustration: Lex Villena; Midjourney)

The most consequential inequality in America is not the wealth gap or the wage gap. It may not be the racial opportunity gap. The marriage gap is wreaking havoc. And unfortunately, it's the gap that gets the least attention.

I'm a libertarian. I don't care whom, or if, you marry. Yet I'm reminded that there is a problem by a new report from the American Enterprise Institute. Edited by Kevin Corinth and Scott Winship, "Land of Opportunity: Advancing the American Dream" covers a broad range of challenges facing the country today, from the cost of living and workforce development to education, crime, and the erosion of community life.

The authors are not culture warriors. They are empirical economists. But among their most important findings are those dealing with the collapse of the American family and what the government has done to accelerate it.

From economist Robert VerBruggen's chapter on the erosion of married parenthood, I learned that in the mid-20th century, only one in 20 children were born out of wedlock. Now it's two in five. I also learned that America has the world's highest rate of children living in single-parent households: 23 percent in the U.S. against an international norm of 7 percent.

Drawing on the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth, VerBruggen shows that 40 percent of millennials from intact, two-parent families graduated from college and 77 percent achieved middle-class incomes or higher. Among those who didn't grow up in intact families, only 17 percent graduated from college and just 57 percent reached middle-class incomes. The latter are also roughly twice as likely to be incarcerated, even after controlling for other socioeconomic factors.

The damage doesn't stop at the front door: Research using tax-return data "suggests that neighborhoods with high rates of single parenthood cultivate lower social mobility, including among kids who themselves are not raised by single parents," VerBruggen notes.

This is a rather bipartisan idea at this point. In a 2013 review of the relevant research, Princeton University sociologist Sara McLanahan and coauthors found that "studies using more rigorous designs continue to find negative effects of father absence on offspring well-being." Economist Melissa Kearney's work shows that marriage protects against poverty among all races. In fact, married parents regardless of race and education suffer significantly less poverty than unmarried mothers.

This collapse in family stability is not happening evenly. Winship and O'Rourke found that while marital births dropped by 29 points overall from 1970 to 2018, they fell by 47 points for the bottom education quintile and by just 6 points for the top. Consistent with that divide, from the early 1960s to the late 2010s, marriage rates fell by roughly 46 percentage points for the least educated young women compared with about 17 points for the most educated, leaving those least able to bear the costs of single parenthood the most likely to experience it.

Marriage is clearly a singularly important institution for raising children and for income mobility. Still, I don't view government efforts to tilt the scale toward marriage favorably. I am also firmly opposed when the government puts its thumb on the scale against marriage.

Unfortunately, VerBruggen marshals evidence showing there is a lot of that going on. A couple with two kids, with each parent earning $30,000, receives around $5,000 in earned income tax credit benefits if they remain unmarried. They lose all those benefits if they marry. That's a tax on marriage.

Medicaid thresholds, housing vouchers, and Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) benefits all phase out in ways that punish couples who combine households and incomes. VerBruggen cites a Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta estimate showing that "7.5 percent more low-income women with kids would be married by age 35 if they were not penalized for doing so."

You cannot simultaneously believe that family structure doesn't matter and that the single-parent disadvantage is a crisis. Or that children's outcomes are shaped by economic conditions and that it's irrelevant whether two committed adults are in the picture or one parent cycles through unstable relationships. Careful researchers, including those attempting to debunk the marriage effect, keep finding it.

My conservative friends focus on redesigning America's $1 trillion safety net to reduce the marriage penalty. But the harder question—the one almost no one asks—is whether that safety net's existence changes the marriage calculus in ways no redesign can fully fix. If the government reliably tries to replace the economic function of a spouse, more people will rationally choose not to marry.

Acknowledging this doesn't require abandoning people in genuine need. Nor does it require overcorrecting and incentivizing women to live in abusive unions. It does, however, require admitting that every dollar of well-intentioned assistance comes with a behavioral price tag that we've largely refused to count.

Sometimes the most compassionate long-term answer is to remove the marriage penalty in welfare programs. Sometimes, it's to have a smaller program or no program at all. We will never know until we honestly ask the question.

COPYRIGHT 2026 CREATORS.COM

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NEXT: Even Laws That Haven't Passed Can Have Unintended Consequences

Veronique de Rugy is a contributing editor at Reason. She is a senior research fellow at the Mercatus Center at George Mason University.

InequalityMarriagePovertyWealthWelfareWelfare ReformTax creditsTaxesFamilyGovernment
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  1. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

    So a repeat of the Moynihan study from the 1950s. Kewl

    Maybe the no consequences ever, no shame ever branch of liberaltarians should have studied more.

    Libertarianism doesnt exist without responsibility, it just devolves into anarchy.

    1. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

      This is a far cry from the usual marriage benefits here.

      A couple with two kids, with each parent earning $30,000, receives around $5,000 in earned income tax credit benefits if they remain unmarried. They lose all those benefits if they marry. That's a tax on marriage.

      How much do they recieve in other benefits for staying unmarried?

      1. Rick James   2 months ago

        The reason the world is free is because of section 230.

      2. Rick James   2 months ago

        The Reason the world ISN'T free is because of The Jones Act.

        1. Don't look at me! ( Is the war over yet?)   2 months ago

          I was told Tarrifs are slavery.

          1. SQRLSY   2 months ago

            I was told that Trump-Suckers are TOO stupid to see that tariffs are taxes!

            Twat are Tarrifs, anyway? Inquiring minds want to KNOW!!!

    2. mad.casual   2 months ago

      anarchy

      And, for the idyllic anarchists out there living on the shire, not the "We all trust each other and nobody gets their hands cut off because their grandfather's grandmother was from a different tribe." kind of anarchy.

    3. Nelson   2 months ago

      “ So a repeat of the Moynihan study from the 1950s. Kewl”

      In the sense that it is a dishonest presentation of facts that doesn’t compare apples to apples and chooses the categories that children will be placed in based on their subsequent success or lack thereof? Yes, exactly.

      “ Maybe the no consequences ever, no shame ever branch of liberaltarians should have studied more.”

      Maybe the “marriage is good, and as proof we will compare two-income families to one-income families” dishonesty of marriage advocates should be exposed as the propaganda it is? Just maybe?

      “ Libertarianism doesnt exist without responsibility”

      Marriage isn’t synonymous with responsibility, just like religion isn’t synonymous with morality. People who claim they are? They’re lying. Perhaps to themselves as well as everyone else, but definitely lying.

      Libertarianism is the definition of responsibility. It is about providing to society the widest range of options of how to live as possible by eliminating as much interference from the state as possible.

      You don’t seem to understand what libertarianism is and what it isn’t.

      Hint: It isn’t someone else forcing their arbitrary moral and cultural preferences on everyone else. That isn’t something only applied to liberals, no matter how hard conservatives try to say it is.

      1. minus the clever name   2 months ago

        Nelson, you are wrong and facts scream it.
        Why did this happen?

        Michael Novak, the George F. Jewett scholar at the American
        Enterprise Institute, had the following to say in regards to the
        political and social ramifications of abortion on AfricanAmerican society: “Since the number of current living blacks
        (in the U.S.) is 31 million, the missing 10 million represents
        an enormous loss for, without abortion, America’s black
        community would now number 41 million persons. It would
        be 35 percent larger than it is currently. Abortion has swept
        through the black community cutting down every fourth
        member.”

        1. Nelson   2 months ago

          “ Nelson, you are wrong and facts scream it.”

          Clearly I am not and the facts scream it.

          Your weird trip through conservative sealion race-conern porn has nothing to do with what I wrote.

          Abortion has nothing to do with marriage, although I will agree both are things that the people involved (and no one else) should choose.

          Why do you think that the fact that blacks are superior at making family-finance decisions is relevant? Why would you think that more (or fewer) black people should be a concern of the government?

          Plus, of course, the AEI isn’t exactly an unbiased organization, is it? It is a virulently anti-abortion organization. Gee, the organization on the fringe of the abortion debate says that abortion is bad? Shocking!

          Even the way it’s worded exposes their bias. Abortion hasn’t “cut down” anyone because abortion doesn’t kill anyone. If you choose to believe that particular fantasy, that’s your choice, but don’t force your illogical “potential is the same as actual” logic on anyone else.

          However I would be fascinated to hear why you think the size of the black population in America is a valid government concern. Why do you think that?

    4. scotterbee   2 months ago

      Consequences exist. It's why you're alone, unmarried, and childless while choosing to live in a shithole suburb and why we all have to see your endless loser complaints about your own bad choices. Consequences are why no one cares about you.

  2. minus the clever name   2 months ago

    I don't care that you don't care.
    The family is the basis of all society , precedes the existence of "society" You do wrong if you penalize it in any way, incl homosexual marriage, gay adoption, etc

    1. Nelson   2 months ago

      “ The family is the basis of all society”

      Nonsense. Society advanced quite well before marriage was a thing, it advanced just as well when marriage was the norm, and it’s continuing to advance very well as marriage slowly fades away.

      Marriage doesn’t make a difference one way or the other. Which is why conservatives refuse to compare stable, two-income marriages to stable, two-income relationships without marriage. When marriage/no marriage is the only variable, it proves that marriage is just a thing.

      Not a good thing, not a bad thing, just a thing.

      1. Rick James   2 months ago

        Stable, two income households, aka "cohabitation" is perfectly fine. This right wing trumpy conservative has no issue with it.

        However, what I don't have any data on, is the number of two income, stable, white-picket-fence-having cohabitating couples... who have children together.

        Unfortunately, the state makes the issue of deciding to have children together a very sticky situation-- and you learn this really quickly once you actually have kids.

        There are all kinds of new strictures that come into play once you have children together-- and again, I wouldn't even begin to suggest that the appearance of a government piece of paper in a filing cabinet that says she/her married makes everything automagically better... but I can tell you from personal experience, the amount of regulatory and legal constructs that surround the act of having children (not all of which I'm against, but am merely pointing out their existence) complicates the narrative a bit.

        1. Rick James   2 months ago

          And marriage aside, once you add in "Hey man, Libertarianism is just about people living how they want without the state like, interfering and stuff"... those legal strictures around the existence of a child kind of interfere bigly with "libertarianism".

          1. Nelson   2 months ago

            I agree. Children should have no relevance to the government and the benefits (tax or otherwise) that they provide.

      2. minus the clever name   2 months ago

        Sorry about your divorce , Nelson, but you are sht to deal with

        1. Nelson   2 months ago

          I’m not divorced. I’ve never been married, which is the #1 cause of divorce.

          I have been with the same woman for almost 27 years now, so there’s that.

          I’m sorry pointing out the weaknesses and failures of paleocon “logic” makes you consider me “hard to deal with”, but that sounds like a you problem. Shift your belief system to one that worries about rights first and results last and you’d find me delightful.

      3. Zeb   2 months ago

        If you mean religiously and/or legally solemnized marriages, sure. But I think that misses the point if you ask me. It's not the marriage certificate that makes things better, but having a stable two parent family to raise children in. Which is basically de facto a marriage, whether you want to call it that or not. And people have been doing that since forever.

        1. You're Kidding   2 months ago

          With multiple spouses no less!

  3. minus the clever name   2 months ago

    Here is what the "I don't care " produced for Black families.

    “Since the number of current living blacks
    (in the U.S.) is 31 million, the missing 10 million represents
    an enormous loss for, without abortion, America’s black
    community would now number 41 million persons. It would
    be 35 percent larger than it is currently. Abortion has swept
    through the black community cutting down every fourth
    member.”

    And Obama and Biden didn't even have to buy the all white outfit with the cowl and crosses to burn, etc.

    1. Vernon Depner   2 months ago

      without abortion, America’s black community would now number 41 million persons.

      And that would be better? Thank God for abortion.

      1. minus the clever name   2 months ago

        Yes , you fool, I muted you.
        Go somewhere and die physically as you have in every other way.

  4. Rick James   2 months ago

    I'm a libertarian. I don't care whom, or if, you marry. Yet I'm reminded that there is a problem by a new report from the American Enterprise Institute. Edited by Kevin Corinth and Scott Winship, "Land of Opportunity: Advancing the American Dream" covers a broad range of challenges facing the country today, from the cost of living and workforce development to education, crime, and the erosion of community life.

    The authors are not culture warriors. They are empirical economists. But among their most important findings are those dealing with the collapse of the American family and what the government has done to accelerate it.

    *sigh*

    Putting the issue of immigration and enrichment aside, I do smile now that it's just considered accepted knowledge that there's a massive birth-rate and population decline in the Western World, and in particular, Europe, Japan and Korea. When that issue was first being raised, we were told, "shut up, Christian-Nationalist anti-abortionist trad-wifey racist! Keep the abortion furnaces glowing".

    1. Rick James   2 months ago

      Reason: WHAT'S UP WITH THIS CUCKOO BANANAS SITUATION WHERE NO ONE'S GETTING MARRIED OR HAVING CHILDREN?!!

      1. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

        Anything ti justify open borders.

  5. Rick James   2 months ago

    I hate to tell you this... it wasn't an obscure tax rule that turned us all into unmarried, childless cat ladies and/or children growing up in single-family households.

    The number of younger, unmarried/childless people I know that have said, "We'd love to get married/have children but that damn earned income tax credit..." is exactly zero.

    There are OTHER things that are driving those decisions... but I don't want to get all Freya India on you.

    1. Rick James   2 months ago

      For instance (linked above) when a large number of 12 year old girls are now saying they don't want to get married, have families and they see "marriage" as an 'outdated modality of adult life', that's not an earned income tax credit that's driving that. That's something else. I'll let y'all fight about what that something else is in the comments.

    2. See.More   2 months ago

      ... it wasn't an obscure tax rule that turned us all into unmarried, childless cat ladies and/or children growing up in single-family households.

      It wasn't an obscure tax rule, alone, certainly. Indeed, the feminist message of, "I don't need no man," and Murphy Brown's primetime adventures an older, professional woman seeking single-motherhood have influenced the mental calculus.

      However, it would be disingenuous to entirely discount the effect of inherent disincentives to marriage endemic in government welfare policies. The unmarried, "welfare broodmare" stereotype exists for a reason.

      It looks more like a multi-pronged attack against the concept of the traditional family structure.

      1. Nelson   2 months ago

        “ The unmarried, "welfare broodmare" stereotype exists for a reason.”

        Yes, it does. Probably not for the reason you want to insinuate, but the fact that posters like ThePublius, LexAquilla, and Rob Misek push that narrative should give you a clue.

        It’s the “welfare queen” lie all over again.

    3. Zeb   2 months ago

      You may not encounter people saying that. But there are certainly people having children and staying single so they can keep the welfare coming in. You see it pretty strongly in certain European countries where as soon as you could get benefits for being a single parent, marriage rates dropped through the floor, or you saw couples waiting to get married until their children were grown. It may not be the primary stated reason, but people do respond to these incentives. And it may well be that the cultural changes that lead to 12 year old girls not wanting to marry have been driven by those incentives at least to some extent.

    4. mad.casual   2 months ago

      Once again,

      00s-era gay rights sign: "If Britney Spears can get married and divorced in the same weekend, why can't I get married?"

      Anyone with half a brain: "Britney Spears getting married and divorced in the same weekend is not an argument in support of marriage of any variety."

      I wonder how many gay couples making $30k a year got married in order to take the $5k hit. I wonder how many gay couples who were out in the Occupy Wall Street protests understood that Edith Windsor skirting $350k+ in federal taxes on the estate of her wife, Thea Spyer, wasn't going to be a win for them economically or morally.

      The US and Global politics has been antisensical "Fuck cutting spending, I've got a pet cause." vibes for a *long* time.

      1. mad.casual   2 months ago

        Again, they were not at all subtle, but anyone asserting an agenda was an bitterly clinging conspiracy kook who probably thinks masks and gloryholes don't stop the spread of COVID:

        “Being queer means pushing the parameters of sex and family, and in the process, transforming the very fabric of society.”

        –National Gay and Lesbian Task Force Policy director,
        Paul Ettelbrick (Kurtz, 2003)
        https://www.josephnicolosi.com/articles/the-truth-about-gay-male-couples/

        February 2006 – “All churches who condemn us will be closed.” That was what Michael Swift, a “gay revolutionary,” declared in a February 1987 issue of the Gay Community News.
        ...
        Paula Ettelbrick is former legal director of the Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund and now executive director of the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission. Ettelbrick stated, “Being queer is more than setting up house, sleeping with a person of the same gender, and seeking state approval for doing so. … Being queer means pushing the parameters of sex, sexuality, and family, and in the process, transforming the very fabric of society. … We must keep our eyes on the goal … of radically reordering society’s views of reality.”
        ...
        Instead, they said, “Against the mighty pull of institutional Religion one must set the mightier draw of Science and Public Opinion (the shield and sword of that accursed ‘secular humanism’). Such an unholy alliance has worked well against churches before, on such topics as divorce and abortion.”

        Thus Christians involved in this theater of the culture war have become accustomed to defending the Judeo-Christian view on sexuality against claims that science has “proven” that homosexuality is genetic.

        https://afajournal.org/past-issues/2006/february/gay-activist-s-war-against-christianity/

        Reason and aligned political ideologies have been stabbing the nuclear family while shouting "Quit committing a culture war against me!" for a very long time.

        1. Rick James   2 months ago

          Reason and aligned political ideologies have been stabbing the nuclear family while shouting "Quit committing a culture war against me!" for a very long time.

          The really sad thing about Reason is they don't even do it because they've read the revolutionary academic literature (as you (and I in the last ten years have bothered to do)) and understand it. And even if one doesn't deep-dive the queer/feminist/critical theories, it doesn't take long to tap a well-spring of telling quotes that you kindly provided us above. No, it's not that they know they're stabbing at the nuclear family, it's that they're so shallow and surface level in their thinking, they've decided that swinging a knife that always just happens to be in the direction of the nuclear family is what the cool kids do and insures you don't look like a Republican. They're sitting on the end of a branch while sawing through it, looking at each other and smirking while saying, "lol *snort* Republicans, amirite?"

  6. The Margrave of Azilia   2 months ago

    "This is a rather bipartisan idea at this point."

    And it's a bipartisan idea to do nothing practical about the problem

    OK, I'm being unfair. Sometimes you see Republicans suggesting some more or less non-insane way to address the issue. And of course you see Democrats proposing to make the situation worse.

    1. Rick James   2 months ago

      Republicans, amirite?

    2. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

      Get government out of the marriage business. Make all taxpayers the same as individual filers. Kids can be assigned to only one adult.

      Easiest way to fix. And I would pay far less in taxes due to marriage penalty.

      1. Vernon Depner   2 months ago

        There is no "marriage penalty". Affluent married couples pay LESS in income tax than a single filer with the same income.

        1. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

          You are analyzing this completely wrong. Because eyoud compare both filers, not just the one making more.

          The marriage penalty occurs when one spouse makes much more than the other. In this case my wife is in the 3rd quintile but every extra dollar she makes is taxed in the 5th as being married carries her to a higher bracket due to my income.

          We pay far more than we would if we both filed as single filers.

          We take zero exemptions despite kids and owe every year.

          So youre just wrong.

          The Tax Policy Centers estimates that in 2018, the individual income tax system caused 43 percent of married couples to face marriage penalties and another 43 percent to receive bonuses.

          https://taxpolicycenter.org/briefing-book/what-are-marriage-penalties-and-bonuses

          1. mad.casual   2 months ago

            I'd ask a rather pointed question about cutting *both* "indigent unmarried women" off the bottom *and* domestically abusive married lesbians and philandering married gay men off the top, but I'm pretty sure I already know that some pet causes are more special than others. Some Superprecedents are not to be questioned.

            Doesn't take *four* decades of being called a backwards, bitter clinging, science-denying, racist, homophobic, conspiracy/agenda theorist to know what's up.

          2. Nelson   2 months ago

            “ The marriage penalty occurs when one spouse makes much more than the other. In this case my wife is in the 3rd quintile but every extra dollar she makes is taxed in the 5th as being married carries her to a higher bracket due to my income.”

            However, you gain her deduction, which you wouldn’t get otherwise.

            A household like yours actually gets preferential, not penalized, tax treatment. The smallest benefit is to married people who make roughly the same amount.

        2. Zeb   2 months ago

          That's not really the situation people talk about with "marriage penalty". The case where both spouses have similar incomes is where you have cases where the total paid would be less if they weren't married and each filed individually. On the other hand, if one spouse has a high income and the other has a very low income, there's a marriage bonus.

          1. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

            Not always true.

            Ive done calculations both ways. I make 3x spouse. Depends how close you are to a jump.

            1. Nelson   2 months ago

              People who do this for a living and know much more than you or I about how it works have proved otherwise. Since the Bush tax cuts, there is essentially no marriage penalty. It’s not even esoteric stuff, it’s widely studied and has a pretty solid consensus.

              There are a number of states that still incorporate a marriage penalty, so it may be that your total tax bill contains a penalty, but at the federal level it is a benefit to be in your situation, not a detriment.

      2. Rick James   2 months ago

        Get government out of the marriage business.

        Whoa... slow down there Racist-bigot McHomophobe!

      3. Nelson   2 months ago

        “ Make all taxpayers the same as individual filers. Kids can be assigned to only one adult.”

        YES!!! I agree 100%.

        Of course I would also argue that the government shouldn’t be giving tax breaks to people because they choose to have children. Your kid, your cost.

        “ And I would pay far less in taxes due to marriage penalty.”

        I would point out that the only married people who theoretically pay a tax penalty are those who make roughly the same amount of income. And even that “penalty” was mostly eliminated back with Bush’s tax cuts.

        Married couples who have widely disparate incomes pay less than they would individually, with single-income households (the breadwinner/homemaker paradigm) getting a significant tax benefit compared to what they would pay individually.

      4. You're Kidding   2 months ago

        I have said this since I was a tax preparer back in the 1980s!

        It's never gotten any traction. And people just deride. Even feminists when I point out that it would be true equality for them.

    3. Nelson   2 months ago

      “ Sometimes you see Republicans suggesting some more or less non-insane way to address the issue.”

      Today’s GOP is definitely adept at pushing solutions in search of a problem.

      I miss Ronald Reagan. He advocated for individuals to adopt socially conservative habits and ideals, but was mostly reluctant to have the government involved in the process.

      Today, coercive cultural conservatism is the rallying call of the GOP.

      1. Rick James   2 months ago

        The government was already involved in the process. He may not have advocated for more government being in the process, but once there's an appearance of children, the government's involved in the process. Cohabitating or not.

        1. Nelson   2 months ago

          Agreed. Children, like marriage, should be irrelevant to the government when considering any benefits (tax or otherwise).

          1. You're Kidding   2 months ago

            👍

        2. JesseAz (RIP CK)   2 months ago

          Reading Nelson drivel hurts my head so has been muted for a while.

          Government should have zero part in marriages. Or children. Should be handled by charities as it was in the past. Willing participation. Families being responsible including multi generational.

          Nelson sees government as his 3rd gay daddy.

          1. Nelson   2 months ago

            “ Reading Nelson drivel hurts my head”

            Higher-order thinking seems to do that to you.

            “ Government should have zero part in marriages. Or children”

            You literally said exactly what I said. Marriage should be irrelevant. Children should be irrelevant. There should be no deductions (or tax advantages) for either. Each individual taxpayer should pay their own taxes, regardless of marital status.

            I also believe that it should be a flat tax, there shouldn’t be any deductions whatsoever, all income (earned and unearned) should be treated the same, and all income should be subject to FICA with no cap.

            “ Nelson sees government as his 3rd gay daddy.”

            I have no idea where you have come up with the idea that I support government intrusion, since I am largely against it. The fewer parts of life that the government coercion is allowed, the better. Government is there as a shield, not a sword.

            But I would imagine that Jesse’s constant desire to strawman anyone who regularly picks apart his pro-authoritarian posts (well, as long as Trump is the authoritarian) has a lot to do with his complete failure to understand my positions.

            It probably also has a lot to do with why he mutes me. He can only get his ass kicked so many times before he withdraws from the competition.

  7. Vernon Depner   2 months ago

    I should make "Stop subsidizing the reproduction of indigent unmarried women" my screen name so I don't have to keep typing it.

  8. Vernon Depner   2 months ago

    Acknowledging this doesn't require abandoning people in genuine need. Nor does it require overcorrecting and incentivizing women to live in abusive unions.

    Yes, it does, but it would be worth it.

  9. Nelson   2 months ago

    Yet another screed by someone who manipulates data and uses dishonest comparisons to make it seem like marriage is a good thong, instead of just a thing.

    Two-income households are economically better off than one-income households? Insane! Who could have ever predicted that?

    And this skewed study into the value of marriage is created by a man who is member of the Institute for Family Studies, a conservative think tank whose whole purpose is to push marriage as a good thing, not just a thing? Insane! Who could have ever predicted that?

    And the assumption that all two income houses are married households, making the economic power of two incomes solely the purview of married people? Typical dishonesty, but that doesn’t stop culture warriors from doing it again and again.

    It’s the same sort of data manipulation as the notorious “studies” into the detrimental effects of homosexuality and/or divorce on children that counted successful children of a gay/divorced parent whose spouse got heterosexual remarried (but not homosexual remarried) as children of married/straight parents, while the children who did poorly in the exact same situation as children of gay/divorced parents. But it’s cultural conservatives, so assuming they are dishonest is a good jumping-off point.

    I mean, come on. When you observe that “Research using tax-return data "suggests that neighborhoods with high rates of single parenthood cultivate lower social mobility, including among kids who themselves are not raised by single parents," and claim that demonstrates the corrosive nature of single-parents families, not that both single-parent and married families in the same socioeconomic conditions have the same outcomes (so marriage isn’t a positive factor) is just brazen dishonesty.

    Claims like “Marriage is clearly a singularly important institution for raising children and for income mobility.”, which has never been demonstrated, is just social conservative propaganda.

    And then there’s this: “A couple with two kids, with each parent earning $30,000, receives around $5,000 in earned income tax credit benefits if they remain unmarried.”. I agree. The insistence by government of tying benefits into households, not individuals, is badly distorting and creates terrible incentives across a wide swath of situations. Marriage is about #276 on the list of bad incentives.

    Then there’s this gem: “You cannot simultaneously believe that family structure doesn't matter and that the single-parent disadvantage is a crisis”. Of course you can. Family structure doesn’t matter, two-income households do.

    The honest way to study this would be to compare households with two incomes from parents who are married with households with two incomes from parents who aren’t married. That’s the only way to discover whether marriage is a factor: compare the exact same situation with the only difference being marriage status. But we all know what would happen in a study like that, which is why coercive cultural conservatives will never do it.

    I have never been married, but I have been with the same woman in a monogamous relationship for 27 years on July 10th. I guarantee that my situation on indistinguishable from the exact same couple who is married.

    Marriage makes no difference, except on an individual emotional level. Some people don’t need marriage to validate our relationships. Some do. Each should be free to pursue the one that makes them happy without moralistic scolds and coercive conservatives trying to demonize some relationships by pretending marriage is better for kids.

    1. Rick James   2 months ago

      Family structure doesn’t matter, two-income households do.

      Right, a structure with four walls where two people live and each earns an income is what matters. Who cares what connection to the child one, both or none of them has.

      1. Nelson   2 months ago

        Marriage doesn’t enhance the connection between parent and child. Married parents can be exactly as abusive, negligent, and awful as unmarried parents. Marriage doesn’t make anyone better or worse, they’re exactly the same person they’ve always been.

        1. damikesc   2 months ago

          It extremely does. How much of the kiddie diddler horror stories involve step-parents? Of the small number, a lot of them involve that.

          No-fault divorce is, easily, the dumbest social policy we've ever enacted.

          1. Nelson   2 months ago

            “ How much of the kiddie diddler horror stories involve step-parents”

            Step parents are, by definition, married. So you help make my point for me. Evil people remain evil when they get married. Good people remain good. Marriage makes bo difference to their character or behavior.

            “ No-fault divorce is, easily, the dumbest social policy we've ever enacted.”

            In your mind the right for a person to choose whether or not they wish to remain in a marriage is … a bad thing? Why should the government be allowed to force someone to remain in a marriage they don’t want to be in?

            You coercive conservatives sure do love to force people to live the way you think they should, regardless of whether they want to live that way.

            It’s why coercive conservatives, by and large, are so awful on social issues. For the self-righteous, “I don’t want to live like you” not only isn’t allowed, it’s bad.

            1. Zeb   2 months ago

              I'd be more OK with no fault divorce if the party who initiates the divorce has no claim on individually held property or future earnings of the other. You want out? Fine, but that's on you. Children complicate that, but if the marriage isn't so bad that at least one party can be held at fault, then maybe you should stay married for the sake of the children.

              1. Nelson   2 months ago

                “ I'd be more OK with no fault divorce if the party who initiates the divorce has no claim on individually held property or future earnings of the other.”

                I can get behind the future earnings part. I’ve always thought alimony was something that made sense from a practical point of view, given the inability for a similarly-intelligent and -educated woman to get the same job and pay as a man back when alimony was created. I don’t see the same discrepancy any more, so I don’t see the logic any more.

                On the property part, I would disagree. Split it 50/50 and walk away. If you choose to get married, you are choosing to commingle your assets and income. It’s all communal, so it is half yours and half hers.

                The alternative is not to get married. If you choose marriage, you are choosing everything that comes with it, including commingled assets.

                “ but if the marriage isn't so bad that at least one party can be held at fault, then maybe you should stay married for the sake of the children.”

                No. That is almost always either a bad idea or a terrible idea. Staying together for the children is awful. It is a voluntary relationship. If one person wants out, that is usually the fault of both parties.

                There is zero justification for creating a penalty for choosing to leave a marriage. If you don’t want your wife to leave you, figure out how to get her to enjoy being in a relationship with you.

                Marriage is a voluntary relationship. When only one person wants to continue in it, that’s the end. Punishing someone for not loving you any more is petty and vindictive.

          2. minus the clever name   2 months ago

            Totally agree. and Nelson will selfishly exclude the horror divorce is for children and concnetrate on all that matters for the US : Nelson !!!!

            1. Nelson   2 months ago

              My parents got divorced back in the 80s when it was viewed as a horrible thing. I know exactly what divorce is. I know exactly what it does to “the children”. And I’ve seen what a nightmare it is for the kids who are in a home where the parents have “stayed together for the children”.

              Daily doses of toxic resentment between two people who don’t love each other is a terrible thing to expose a child to. Grow up and move on. It’s better for everyone, especially the children.

        2. minus the clever name   2 months ago

          Which shows the stupidity of your ocmments. IF it were forever, if it were a socially-honored commitment, being abusive, negligent, and awful would be something worse than 'oh, guess I'll just divorce the bastard" the throw-away nature of modern marriage (your attitude) is why marriages do not last

          1. Nelson   2 months ago

            Marriages don’t last for a wide variety of reasons. It’s not some sort of “people today are shallow” situation. Marriages, like any other relationship, sometimes just don’t work. There is nothing special about marriage except for the social mythology and legal benefits it provides.

            At the end of the day, a marriage is a mutually-agreed-upon partnership. When it is no longer mutually desired, there is no justification for legally forcing it to continue, nor for making it so financially painful or infeasible for either party to end.

            If you want a relationship to last, work harder to make it last. If that doesn’t work, move on. You can’t force someone to live you, nor will punishing them for leaving help anyone.

      2. mad.casual   2 months ago

        This is actually really funny to hear in light of all the "OMG! Trump touched the King!" and "The best way to fight teen pregnancy is with female literacy."

        Across cultures; two income households, one breadwinner, four walls, a walled compound with extended relatives... consistently, non-biological parental units are a massively disproportional risk to children both directly and indirectly.

        Marriage as a state-sanctioned union or whatever isn't critical but, biological parents are and for all kinds of reasons from actual abuse to patterning behaviors of risk aversion and impulse control. Biological parents are by no means perfect or foolproof and they are a common source of problems, but the rates for non-biological parents *across cultures* is ***PHENOMENALLY*** higher.

    2. Rick James   2 months ago

      Marriage makes no difference, except on an individual emotional level. Some people don’t need marriage to validate our relationships.

      And yet, we spent a decade listening to a whole cohort of politics scream about its importance.

      1. Nelson   2 months ago

        Yes, it’s one of the many, many subjects about which the conservative culture warriors love to try to coerce people.

        The government doesn’t belong in marriage. Period. There should be no distinction between married and unmarried people in any government effort, policy, or program.

        Same goes for whether or not people have children.

      2. mad.casual   2 months ago

        Importance? Criticality to fundamental human rights. Denying people marriage made them second class citizens. Like chattel slavery, just without all the "color of their skin vs. content of character" de facto discrimination and taking the fruit of their labors stuff.

        1. Nelson   2 months ago

          “ Denying people marriage made them second class citizens”

          Yes, it did. When there are benefits available to some, but not all, relationships it is exactly that.

          The fact that some people don’t choose marriage (and that’s good, that they can choose) doesn’t mean that marriage isn’t important to others. All should have an equal right to choose (or reject) marriage. That’s what gay marriage was about.

          Yet another subject on which coercive conservatives were the evil side of the “good or evil” balance sheet on a cultural issue.

    3. AJinNJ   2 months ago

      Thank you Nelson. This is the type of discourse I wish I saw more of on the internet. Objectively breaking things down and providing well reasoned criticism. I used to do what you're doing here myself, but I burnt out from dealing with so many stupid people, ass holes, and those just unwilling to look at facts when presented with them. The constant logical fallacies (particularly the straw man arguments, and ad hominems) really drained me. Keep up the search for the truth and objectivity as long as you can; wish I still had it in me to do the same. Hopefully, I'll get back there.

    4. You're Kidding   2 months ago

      What this is evidence of is a lack of understanding of statistical analysis and the scientific method.

      It's rampant in the linear thinking today. If A then B then C. No controls. No repeatability. No understanding of outlier data points.

      Thus we have, correlation=causation thought process all around us. Sheep waiting to be slaughtered. Bleating the whole way down.

  10. Rick James   2 months ago

    Acknowledging this doesn't require abandoning people in genuine need. Nor does it require overcorrecting and incentivizing women to live in abusive unions.

    I like how only women live in abusive unions.

    1. Rick James   2 months ago

      I also like how we keep confirming (or outright bolstering) stereotypes while eschewing them at every possible opportunity.

      Only women suffer when "forced" to "remain" in "abusive unions". Each one of those scare-quoted words adds layers of stereotyped implications which branch off in... probably thousands of directions if you followed each branch to its logical conclusion.

      1. mad.casual   2 months ago

        And, as indicated above, we won't talk about how the most abusive and unfulfilling marital relationships women can have are with other women.

    2. Nelson   2 months ago

      “ I like how only women live in abusive unions.”

      Statistically it is over 95% men who are the abusers and women who are the victims. There are always exceptions to any rule, but the overwhelming majority of abusers are men.

      1. See.More   2 months ago

        Statistically it is over 95% men who are the abusers and women who are the victims. There are always exceptions to any rule, but the overwhelming majority of abusers are men.

        Where does that statistic and subsequent conclusion come from? It certainly is not a crystal ball insight into every abusive relationship.

        The only places that kind of statistic can come from are either reports of abuse or anecdotal self-reporting to polls, surveys, doctors, helplines, etc.. Both are incredibly problematic.

        There is a huge difference between 95% of abuse reports indicting men and the conclusion that 95% of abuse is perpetrated by men.

        1. minus the clever name   2 months ago

          No, the error is your unstated implication that divorce is the answer.

          all wrong, asks the wrong questions, is opposed by statistics, adn ignores that many get married who should not. But if marriage is two lust-riddled gays or a trans and a pervert why even use the word ??

          Unhappily married adults who divorced or separated were no happier on average than unhappily Married adults who stayed married. This included spouses who had remarried others after their divorce and remained true across all races, ages, genders, and income levels.

          Divorce did not reduce symptoms of depression for unhappily married spouses or raise their self-esteem compared to unhappy spouses who stay married.

          Eighty-six percent of the unhappy spouses reported no abuse or violence in their marriages.

          Two out of three unhappy married adults who avoided divorce or separation five years later reported that their feelings had changed and that they were once again happily married.

          One out of five unhappy spouses who divorced and remarried reported being happily remarried.

          Unhappily married adults who divorced were no more likely to report emotional and psychological improvements than those who stayed married.

          The most unhappy marriages reported the most dramatic turnarounds.

          Many currently happily married spouses have had extended periods of marital unhappiness, often for quite serious reasons, including alcoholism, infidelity, verbal abuse, emotional neglect, depression, illness, and work reversals. (2)

      2. Bruce Hayden   2 months ago

        Nope. Men reporting physical abuse are ridiculed, and reporting emotional or verbal abuse are ignored.

        There was a famous segment on Tom Snyder almost 50 years ago, parodied on SNL soon after. Guys are, essentially, riddled for admitting being hit by their wives. Still, to this day. So don’t report it very often.

      3. You're Kidding   2 months ago

        That's a statistic. Supporting a hypothesis. It isn't scientific proof.

    3. damikesc   2 months ago

      No shit. I had to have an ex of mine arrested because she decided to attack me when I was leaving and I knew if I so much as touched her arm, she'd bruise and I'd be in jail.

      1. Nelson   2 months ago

        So we are just supposed to assume that these theoretical abuse claims that aren’t made do … what? Make it a 50/50 thing?

        Let’s also remember that family annihilators are usually men and one of the leading causes of death for women 18-30 is murder by their husband/boyfriend.

        Somehow being yelled at by a woman you can easily divorce seems like small potatoes to, you know, being murdered. It’s the difference between a stubbed toe and your husband murdering your children, then you.

      2. minus the clever name   2 months ago

        And she was an angel BEFORE she married you. I see.

  11. CE   2 months ago

    Everyone is already equally free to get married though. Young people just want to stay single and have fun for a lot longer before starting families now. So instead of getting married at 23 and having 3 or 4 kids, they're getting married at 33 and trying to have one or two kids as they near age 40.

    As recently as 1980, the median age at first marriage was 22 for women and 24 for men. Now it's 28 and 31.

    1. Nelson   2 months ago

      “ As recently as 1980, the median age at first marriage was 22 for women and 24 for men. Now it's 28 and 31.”

      Mid- to late-20s seems like a perfect place for a first marriage, if one wants such a thing.

      Interesting thing, the only reason I would get married is if my relationship falls apart.

      Because Delaware has no common law marriage and I have significantly more assets, the only way to split our assets equally without taking a huge tax hit (because anything I give her would be a gift) would be to get married and then instantly divorced. So for a number of reasons I hope I never get married.

      1. damikesc   2 months ago

        Seems like a terrible idea. We need children. Period. End of story. We need a massive increase in fertility. Improving family courts to not utterly fuck over fathers on the regular is definitely needed.

        The only problem is that a lot of young women have become absolutely bat-shit nuts. The men have not changed much, but the women are borderline psychopaths.

        1. Nelson   2 months ago

          “ We need children”

          Agreed.

          “ We need a massive increase in fertility”

          Why? What is the “good” in a constantly increasing population and what is the “bad” in letting population settle in at a balance point? It seems awfully arbitrary and baseless to insist that anything except an ever-increasing population is bad.

          “ Improving family courts to not utterly fuck over fathers on the regular is definitely needed.”

          Somebody has issues. Perhaps some self-reflection to help you identify your responsibility in getting utterly fucked over is in order?

          “ The only problem is that a lot of young women have become absolutely bat-shit nuts. The men have not changed much, but the women are borderline psychopaths.”

          Now why would people think that you are a misogynist? Making such broad generalizations while placing all the blame on “young women” and none on “the men” may give you a hint.

          1. damikesc   2 months ago

            You can look at any opinion poll and see young women have gone FAR off to the Left. You can look at their disdain for men. Western women are, basically, unmarryable.

            I do not care if this is "misogyny". Simple reality is not always fun. White western women are absolutely insane.

            We've had the claim that "boys are being radicalized" shoved down our throats for years when the fucking opposite is true.

            1. mad.casual   2 months ago

              Goldfish in a woke fishbowl.

              It's only misogyny in the modern conception where failing to constantly validate everyone's lived experiences is abuse, violence from "oppressed" "minorities" is speech and speech from "majority" "oppressors" is violence, and everyone is a Nazi.

              Again, the vast majority of feminist narratives are cherry picked, half blinded, anti-scientific, anti-historic/anachronistic, and even self-inflicted going back to the 60s, if not further.

              It's pretty arguable that even the first wave of feminism was founded on a selective discounting of natural benefits and an exaggeration of unfair "oppression". If you wrote a conspiracy where women intentionally conspired to vote men off to war so they could take their jobs, tax incomes, and take control of spending, it would look like the early 20th Century. A feminist might argue that such an interpretation robs men of their agency in their own self-destruction, which is both correct, and the point. It's not misogynistic to point out that women have stood shoulder-to-shoulder with men in generating false narratives to rob themselves and each other (and men) of their agency. It's not like we gave women the right to vote and got an abundance of peace, fiscal responsibility, and social harmony.

            2. scotterbee   2 months ago

              I'd bet the truth is you're just a mediocre man with poor judgement. Genetic dead end and all that.

              1. damikesc   2 months ago

                I'm glad your daily affirmations work for you, but please do not broadcast them to others.

                1. Nelson   2 months ago

                  He’s not the one with the thin skin and an anger at the majority of women in America. Except the sad, pitiful ones that choose to be TradWives, I guess. You think that’s what a woman should be, right?

            3. Nelson   2 months ago

              “ You can look at any opinion poll and see young women have gone FAR off to the Left. You can look at their disdain for men. Western women are, basically, unmarryable.”

              Dear God, can you whine any more? Western women are eminently marryable. They just aren’t interested in being married to people with a 1950s mindset. That’s what your complaint really is, that “the man is always right” get you laughed out of the room.

              “ Simple reality is not always fun”

              Your throwback, Neanderthal opinions aren’t reality, they’re a dying belief system that weak men needed to feel good about themselves.. Dress it up with a name like TradWife all you want, it’s male insecurity hiding behind flawed reasoning..

              “ White western women are absolutely insane.”

              I’m sure there’s a mail-order bride you can enslave to make you feel strong and virile since competent, confident, assertive women are beyond you.

              “ We've had the claim that "boys are being radicalized" shoved down our throats for years when the fucking opposite is true.”

              Any other complaints, Captain Snowflake?If you take the most radical beliefs of the people you choose to hate and pretend they are mainstream, that’s a you problem.

      2. AJinNJ   2 months ago

        Unfortunately late-20s is an awful point biologically to have children.
        Over 50% of females have fertility issues by 31, and over 40% by 30. And 10%+ of females are completely infertile by 30.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_infertility#/media/File:Age_and_female_fertility.svg

        Also the birth defect rate gets up above 3.5% by 30 (this includes genetic and non-genetic birth defects). A 1 in 30 chance of having a kid with a birth defect can be enough to push people away from risking having a kid that would have a poor quality of life.

        1. Bruce Hayden   2 months ago

          Add in professional careers. Daughter got married at roughly 30, as did many of her friends. Her entire bridal party had doctorate degrees, and married about the same age. Funny thing there is that she (MechE Phd) and bestie (DDS) from HS, were each other’s best women, a month apart, and had daughters one day apart.

          First births are much easier in their early 20s, a decade younger than these women face. We worry that, with her, we won’t see a second child, as her parents saw after she was born. And certainly not a third one (I offered them my Audi Q7 for a third one, for its extra row of seats, with no interest whatsoever).

  12. TJJ2000   2 months ago

    LOL...
    That's literally what ?Equality? by socialism is by its own definition.
    To Tax/Steal competency to pay for MORE in-competency.

    Funny how things that are so obvious can get so polluted when socialism comes to town.
    Is there really any mystery to why Socialism fails? It is literally 'planned' to do that.

  13. MWAocdoc   2 months ago

    "even after controlling for other socioeconomic factors"

    Although I have not yet read the detail of the study designs, color me skeptical that the social "scientists" controlled for these factors correctly. Even hard scientists frequently miss confounding as a factor in their study design. Fuzzy "scientists" are much more likely to design their models in post-hoc analyses of public data without taking into account that one of the outcomes is, in fact, an input and causative factor for one or more study variables. For example, if socioeconomic status accounts for both marital status AND incarceration outcomes instead of marital status accounting for incarceration alone, then the conclusions are flawed. Likewise educational attainment etc.

  14. Agammamon   2 months ago

    Oh, are we going to start talking about the massive amount of racism in the Democratic Party, hidden under the guise of 'helping minorities' while every policy they propose further ruins those same minorities?

  15. minus the clever name   2 months ago

    Veronique de Rugy, please call 'Earth" !!!!

    The penalty is in the HUGE social cost of men from broken families

    while single men over age 14 comprised only 13% of the population at the time of his writing, they accounted for 60% of all criminals and committed approximately 90% of major and violent crimes.Institutionalization: Single men were roughly twice as likely as married men to commit crimes, go to jail, or be institutionalized for various social pathologies.

    s data—including studies by sociologist Jessie Bernard—to argue that singleness is psychologically damaging for men.

    Single men were found to be three times more prone to nervous breakdowns and nearly twice as likely to exhibit "severe neurotic symptoms" compared to married men.

    Compared to married men, single men are 30% more likely to suffer from depression and show "phobic tendencies" or "passivity".Suicide: Single men have the highest mortality rate of any group, with suicide being an increasingly frequent cause of death as they age.

    BUT THE INSANE LACUNA is about marriage and divorce

    Did unhappy spouses who divorced reap significant psychological and emotional
    benefits? Surprisingly, in this study, the answer was no. Among our findings:
    • Unhappily married adults who divorced or separated were no happier, on average,
    than unhappily married adults who stayed married. Even unhappy spouses
    who had divorced and remarried were no happier, on average, than unhappy spouses
    who stayed married. This was true even after controlling for race, age, gender, and
    income.
    • Divorce did not reduce symptoms of depression for unhappily married adults,
    or raise their self-esteem, or increase their sense of mastery, on average, compared
    to unhappy spouses who stayed married. This was true even after controlling
    for race, age, gender, and income.
    • The vast majority of divorces (74 percent) happened to adults who had been
    happily married five years previously. In this group, divorce was associated with dramatic
    declines in happiness and psychological well-being compared to those who stayed
    married.
    • Unhappy marriages were less common than unhappy spouses. Three out of four
    unhappily married adults were married to someone who was happy with the marriage.2
    • Staying married did not typically trap unhappy spouses in violent relationships.
    Eighty-six percent of unhappily married adults reported no violence in their relationship
    (including 77 percent of unhappy spouses who later divorced or separated). Ninety-three
    percent of unhappy spouses who avoided divorce reported no violence in their marriage
    five years later.

    • Two out of three unhappily married adults who avoided divorce or separation
    ended up happily married five years later. Just one out of five of unhappy spouses
    who divorced or separated had happily remarried in the same time period.

    WHEN WILL REASON SEE THE GENESIS of all their complaints is something they cause by their gay, trans, anti-marriage bullshit

    The Libertarian view of marriage causes most of these problems.

    1. You're Kidding   2 months ago

      As my high school chums and I used to say, after we found out that our auto insurance rates were more than double those of our female classmates, "Steady sex makes you mellow".

      Testosterone has been identified as a long term health threat.

  16. car-keynes   2 months ago

    Why does the federal government need to know if you are married or not? What purpose does it serve that the census does not serve redundantly and therefore expensively?

    This issue should be one of privacy.

    As for paying couples more to remain unmarried, one may easily anticipate that this was the only political move that was easy enough to accomplish after same sex marriage became recognized (A contract being a contract, even when in fact between two actual people.).

    Back in the 1990s people were paid to be married, because the tax exemption was made bigger for married-filing-jointly. Married-filing-separately was at greater expense.

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