Brickbats

Brickbat: No Sex Please, We're British

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It is now illegal in the United Kingdom for people who don't live together to have sex. The new law is part of changes to strengthen efforts to battle the coronavirus. Previously, the government barred people from leaving their homes without a "reasonable excuse." The new regulations spell out in more detail exactly when people can leave their homes, and having sex is not among those reasons for which people are allowed to leave. Those violating the law face a fine of £100 ($127), but officials say law enforcement won't have the ability to go into homes and see if anyone is there who shouldn't be. After a public outcry, Prime Minister Boris Johnson adjusted the rules to allow singles living alone to connect.

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  2. I suppose the average British citizen is just too damned law abiding to provide enough revenue for the government.

    I also expect Brit porn to get a whole lot weirder, if that is even possible.

    1. what is it about island nations and getting freaky?

      1. I don’t know, but it explains all the “stuck on an island” hypothetical questions.

      2. I’ve met some sexy New Zealanders, but they didn’t strike me as particularly freaky. Not even sheep-wise. Maybe you’re thinking of the Cubans?

        1. Leave Billl Clinton out of this.

      3. “And they’ll all descended from convicts so they don’t mind being chained up.”
        Line about Australians from “Two guys, a girl and a pizza parlour.”

  3. …officials say law enforcement won’t have the ability to go into homes and see if anyone is there who shouldn’t be.

    That’s what the CCTV cameras are for.

  4. “Johnson adjusted the rules to allow singles living alone to connect.”

    So if a single person lives with one or more roommates, they are screwed? Or maybe they are only allowed to screw their previously Platonic roommates?

    1. And if they live with family…

      1. The Royals should be happy with that…. long live the Queen.

  5. The new regulations spell out in more detail exactly when people can leave their homes, and having sex is not among those reasons for which people are allowed to leave.

    Totes wrong. If *anything* is of the essence, it is having sex.

  6. But if they stay through the night, are they not”living together”?

    1. Only if they stay for breakfast.

  7. The Brits are still battling the coronavirus? Just send some Black Lives Matter peaceful protestors over, clears that shit right up.

    1. Don’t worry, they already have their own BLM protests. However, given that bobbies aren’t allowed to murder anyone, the protests have mostly been directed at statues of slavers. In a way, the mantra of the UK BLM is:

      “F*ck off, slavers!”

      I think most of us can appreciate that sentiment.

  8. What will they do now? Will they lock up that whole fornicating House of Commons? How about those Royal Family trysts? This could get very entertaining very quickly.

    1. Come on. The royals have always been allowed to marry their cousins, and then start major wars when family relations don’t work out.

      Now that’s entertainment.

    2. For most MPs paying 100 pounds for sex is a discount.

  9. There is absolutely nothing under the sun that another law, or 2 or 3 or 4…can’t make better.

    Let’s just see how bad it can get over there, and perhaps we might take a warning?

    No, that’s not gonna happen because good intentions.

    1. Sounds like they need a Brexit Brexit. It’s authoritarians the whole way down.

  10. They have made a rule that at best they can arbitrarily enforce for the sake of saying they have a rule in place. I cannot imagine anyone actually being charged with this, especially someone who is in the alphabet sexual minorities.

  11. It is now illegal in the United Kingdom for people who don’t live together to have sex.

    Just jerk off and think of England.

    1. thinking of the Queen mum is not very enticing

  12. “Those violating the law face a fine of £100 ($127)”

    I thought it was illegal to pay for sex? Now it’s mandated? The state is going to have to learn the old fashioned way that “pimpin’ ain’t easy.”

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    2. Prostitution laws are a bit ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ in the UK.
      It’s not illegal but running a knocking shop is, as street solicitation and kerb crawling.

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