Brickbat: You Can Leave Your Hat On


Around 1,000 students and community members at Colorado State University defied administrators and held the annual Undie Run celebrating the end of the school year. School officials had had tried to shut down the run this year, warning that the combination of alcohol, marijuana and numerous people in their underwear that is typical of the run had made it rife with unwanted sexual touching.

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  1. What proof do they have that the sexual touching was unwanted? Seems to me that is the one of the goals of parading around in just your underwear.

    1. So you’re saying the way they were dressed means they were asking for it?

      1. If you wear the uniform….

      2. College really has become 4 years of prom. On campus, the chaperones keep out their rulers to make sure everyone gives everyone else enough space. Off campus … I suppose it’s like prom night, an awkward time sleeping on the bedroom floor of some guy who smoked up in front of you after he asks you to take him home because the heavy set chick you were taking to your friend’s prom as a favor to your friend ended up not connecting with you that way as soon as she saw you successfully tie a cherry stem with your tongue when your friend said she would marry a guy if he could do that. Maybe people are right about me having trouble giving and taking hints.

      3. OMG, yes, I suppose I am! I feel terrible about this.

      4. We need a few days to let the girls decide if they were asking for it or not.

        1. Days? Consent can be withdrawn retroactively years, no decades, down the road. In fact, I do not believe there is any limit on that. “All the way to the grave, baby; I’m gonna hold it over you and hound your ass!”

    2. You no longer have to provide proof that an interaction between two third parties unrelated to you is unwanted by any one of them.

      You merely need to assert that *you felt* the interaction was unwanted – by you – and that’s enough. Now the burden of proof is on the other parties that the interaction was consensual between both them and anyone else ‘who might be affected’.

      Gotta get them stakeholder voices.

  2. “unwanted sexual touching”

    I don’t understand what that means?

    1. It means Steve the quarterback didn’t touch me, as I preferred. Instead, Urkel the computer geek accidentally or nervously touched my hip with his hip.

      1. Hahaha

        1. it’s funny ’till the fat chick winds up preggo, then it’s fucking hilarious…

  3. Please tell me they at least had a passel of trauma counselors on hand to deal with the emotionally fragile victims of this literal Holocaust.

    1. They held the indie run just a couple of days ago, and I am literally shaking right now, OK??

  4. The university did use the Larimer County Sheriff’s Office’s video truck during the event. The truck recorded images campus police hope to use to help identify anyone accused of inappropriate sexual contact….
    “We’re looking at all of it,” Donovan said
    In other news Larimer county is experience a sudden and unexplained shortage of hand lotion.

  5. So let me get this straight. These students are cool with RUNNING around in nothing but tighty-whiteys or panties—various body parts jiggling and bouncing for all their classmates, professors, and staff to see. But if a speaker or teacher presents them with any fact or personal opinion that happens to contradict their own personal belief or expectations, they are traumatized and “hurt” mentally in a way they consider just as painful and scarring as if they were physically attacked?

    1. Hurt doesn’t belong in quotes! Bad words are literally violence even if those words were fine last week.

      1. Wait, what? I thought silence is violence.

    2. They aren’t going to an Ivy League school so they probably don’t know better. Their betters will let them know they shouldn’t be having fun and should be getting professors fired for words.

    3. To be fair, the overlap between the participants of this event and those harmed by words is probably near zero.

    4. Well I guess somebody had to bring that up.

    5. Nice generalization you got going there. I’m sure every single person at that college is exactly as you described them in your universal declaration of “how it is”.

  6. The university did use the Larimer County Sheriff’s Office’s video truck during the event.

    Oh, I’m just sure it fucking did.

  7. Stop your grinnin’ and drop your linen!

    1. Game over, man! Game over!

      1. hehehe

  8. <3

    Speaking of unwanted touching, Israel took the new law against prostitution seriously. Now the lap dances here don't have any crotch grinding. If they have wifi there, you might get an update next week on whether or not those Turkish prison rumors are true.

    1. This thing has nothing to do with that thing.

  9. Suggested alt-text: panties were unbunched for photo

  10. Nice looking bunch of kids; can’t say I blame them for wanting to show it off.

  11. “Next year, we’ll continue working with students to figure out other ways to blow off steam.”
    How about drinkin alcohol and smokin weed?!

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