Reason Roundup

Comic Says ICE Raided His Home Over Twitter Joke About Cultural Appropriation: Reason Roundup

Plus: President Trump moves to protect Chinese jobs, and why White House leakers leak

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@feraljokes/Twitter

Watch what you tweet. When it comes to taking a joke, the feds make progressive college-kids look like George Carlin. Two recent stories highlight how aggressively Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) and the FBI are policing speech on social media, seeing "threats" and "terrorism" in statements clearly not intended as such. (Sound familiar, woodchipper fans?) In the first, ICE opened an investigation into Brooklyn comedian Jake Flores because of his Twitter jokes about Cinco de Mayo, cultural appropriation, and ICE agents.

On May 5, Flores started by questioning chattering-class priorities. "It would be cool if we talked about cultural appropriation after we ABOLISH ICE," Flores tweeted. "One of these things is a problem that we can actually solve that people are frankly not doing much about, and one of these is an unsolvable symptom of culture that we've built an industry around endlessly analyzing fueled by scolding, guilt, and clicks."

These tweets were followed up by Flores laying out a modest proposal for how Cinco de Mayo should work:

White people are allowed to culturally appropriate on the condition that you help to destroy ICE. You kill 1 ICE agent and you get to wear a sombrero. 2 kills and you can wear a pancho.

3rd kill you can draw a mustache on your face in sharpie. 5 kills and you can do skull paint. It goes on and on like this up to 100…

After you kill 100 ICE agents you area allowed to be full on racist and no one can give you sh-t about it. Drive a lowrider, call people wetbacks, get a weird tattoo of a chola that's also a clown for some reason. No one can stop you. You earned it.

The next day, Homeland Security allegedly showed up at Flores' apartment door.

ICE Press Secretary Jennifer Elzea has at least confirmed that the agency opened an investigation into Flores after reading his tweets (no word from Elzea on the alleged apartment visit). "The kind of language expressed…even in an allegedly joking manner, is reckless and irresponsible," she tells Splinter News. "It potentially puts at risk those who have taken an oath to uphold the law and protect public safety."

Meanwhile, The Guardian offers up an all-too-similar story. Rakem Balogun of Texas fell under FBI surveillance for making Facebook posts that didn't sit right with the bureau. In December of last year, agents raided Balogun's house and arrested him; they kept him in jail for five months (with no bail allowed). But the "case [against Balogun] fell apart," notes New York:

Eventually, the Feds resigned themselves to busting the man for illegally owning a firearm; a judge found that charge to be bogus. He was freed; but while the government had kept him locked up for the crime of expressing an affection for guns—and opinions the deep state didn't like—he lost his car, job, home, and the opportunity to witness the first year of his newborn's life.

FREE MINDS

Polarization in "Real America" pales in comparison to tribalism among elites. "In our current culture, it's precisely the elites who seem to be driving tribal identity and thought," writes Andrew Sullivan in his latest New York magazine column. Sullivan points to a new book from Lilliana Mason detailing how "the more highly educated also tend to be more strongly identified among political lines."

"Our elite debate," suggests Sullivan, "has become far less focused on individual issues as such, and the complicated variety of positions, left, right and center, any thinking individual can take. It has become rather an elaborate and sophisticated version of 'Which side are you on?'"

It's a bad breeding ground for libertarianism. In such a "deeply tribal" atmosphere, writes Sullivan, "the individual is always subordinate to the group" and "the 'I' is allowed only when licensed by the 'we.'" Read the whole thing here.

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  1. Lmao Homeland Security just busted down my door over a joke
    ? Jake Flores (@feraljokes) May 6, 2018

    That’s how you get the last laugh.

    1. Hello.

      “Eventually, the Feds resigned themselves to busting the man for illegally owning a firearm; a judge found that charge to be bogus. He was freed; but while the government had kept him locked up for the crime of expressing an affection for guns?and opinions the deep state didn’t like?he lost his car, job, home, and the opportunity to witness the first year of his newborn’s life.”

      This is when I hope karma exists.

    2. What the hell? Is this the UK or something?

      1. “Is this the UK or something?”

        Yes, of course.

        Since “or something” pretty much covers everything that is not the UK, this question is a truism under formal logic and the statement is the logical equivalent of “A or not A” which as a whole is true whether A is true or false.

    3. “That’s how you get the last laugh”

      This is what’s known as a No-Knock knock joke.
      /I’ll be here all weak. Tip your Fist

        1. “Gun in your face. That’s who’s there.”

        2. Nobody. Nobody knocked. Go back to sleep.

        3. GET A WARRANT!

        4. “Fuck you, that’s who!”

        5. Dave’s not here, man.

          1. Yeah, Dave. C’mon, man, open up, I think the cops saw me.

    4. The real problem with these comedians is that they completely lack talent.
      Deport/execute him for being a talentless hack

  2. If you propose killing cops on Twitter, you’re gonna get a visit from them. What a fucking idiot.

    1. He did not threaten to kill cops or a specific person.

      The 1st Amendment applies to protect his speech.

      The government does not like it but too bad.

    2. “Raided his home over a twitter joke about cultural appropriation”

      I’m not seeing why a joke about Cultural Appropriation has anything to do with killing ICE agents. Looks more like he was looking for an excuse to tweet how he recommends killing ICE agents.

    3. I suppose you can put his “joke” down as satire, but sarcasm does not translate very well over short form written material on social media. It also was not funny and in very bad taste. Also, they did not investigate him over the cultural appropriation aspect of said joke, but the murder aspect of it.

      1. As usual, Reason writes a bullshit headline.

        1. As usual, snowflakes can’t take a joke.

      2. I thought it was funny 🙂 Then again I like bad Chinese movies too. We of similar black humor for D.E.A agents and running over children ( When death race 2000 first came out in the 70’s in think it was 125 points for a baby, but don’t remember.) are still common.

    4. You are damned statist boot-licking fools, if you think it was an appropriate ICE response. The Supreme Court has made it clear that only credible individual threats are not protected by the First Amendment.

      These raids were blatant “you can’y afford the ride” retaliation for butt hurt in the third degree. Goddamned federal snowflakes were melting in their jackboots.

      In a just world, they’d be fired and lose their pension, and personally responsible for 5 months’ restitution, including whatever it cost to restore his house and car, and groveling at his former employer until he got his job back. Only then would they be allowed to resume whatever kind of normal life they could make without a government paycheck or badge.

      1. The law is pretty clear that this is protected speech. Checking out someone who says such things might be justifiable in some circumstances, but taking action against him is not unless his speech was “directed to inciting or producing imminent lawless action” and “likely to incite or produce such action.”

        Since this almost certainly does none of the above, taking action against the guy isn’t legal.

        1. Police can absolutely try and talk to this guy. “Investigate” if you will.

          The flip side is that this guy never has to speak to police. Ever. Thanks to the 5th Amendment.

        2. Yeah, I really fail to see how the government was justified in this raid. The guy was certainly not raided over his ‘cultural appropriation’ but rather the death threats, but that said if the government thought these were credible threats it means that they have lost all right to continue to interpret that is credible or not.

          I think the most probable scenario is the government has been burned so many times over their lack of being able to do anything that at this point they’re just going whole-hog DEFCON 5 on anyone that hooves into their line of sight.

          Definitely not a good precedent, and since government will always miss cases it means the ratchet is only going to turn in one direction. That people didn’t recognize the problem during the Branch Davidian issue tells you that they are probably incapable of seeing the issue at all.

          It’s becoming apparent that the biggest threat to liberty is the movement towards ‘safety’ but this was known almost 250 years ago so…again…people are probably just incapable of seeing the problem.

      2. He wrote ” “One of these things is a problem that we can actually solve that people are frankly not doing much about”

        And then he went on to give a recipe of sorts for killing ICE agents. He didn’t name any specific agent but he was definitely recommending people kill them.
        It was probably a joke, or more likely a wish wrapped up in a joke.
        He tweets ICE busted down his door. Maybe so or maybe more hyperbole.
        I don’t have any problem with someone from ICE asking him questions about his message and if he has violent intentions.
        I do have a problem if they busted down his door.

        1. It was protected speech. He made no individual threats. He was locked up for 5 months.

          You are a fucking statist making excuses for fucking statist enforcers.

          Fuck off, slaver.

          1. Jake Flores was locked up for five months over a joke he told eight days ago?

            1. Forget it, he’s on a roll.

            2. I got the two conflated, but there’s no practical difference.

              Still an amazing number of statist suckers here. They can all fuck off and die.

              1. Lighten up Francis. Several people have said that it is reasonable for ICE to ask him if he intends violence against ICE agents…. and nothing else.

              2. Still an amazing number of statist suckers here. They can all fuck off and die.

                Are you considering anyone who merely claims that the guy is an idiot and his joke is idiotic to be statist suckers? Is simply criticizing the guy equal to defense of the actions taken against him in your mind?

          2. Actions have consequences.
            You publish a bounty with varied rewards (no matter how ridiculous) based on number of kills, you deserve to get confronted about it. Maybe he shouldve taken a beating to.
            Pretend it’s not ICE. Pretend he said New York Giants fans, or players.
            The natural consequence of such an action is an ass beating. Because the targets were State functionaries, he was spared the beating.
            But f*** him and f*** you for being pussies who want to mouth off and then whine about repercussions.

            1. The natural consequence of such an action is an ass beating. Because the targets were State functionaries, he was spared the beating.

              Lol what a bunch of snowflake fucksticks

            2. The Constitution does protect the People’s right to mouth off without fear of government repercussions. Thanks to the 1st Amendment.

              The police can absolutely try and talk to this guy. This guy can refuse to talk to police. Thanks to the 5th Amendment.

              If police have enough probable cause then they can arrest him for a crime. This guy can demand a speedy trial and demand a jury trial. Thanks to the 6th Amendment.

              Lawfully challenging state police powers is good for the bureaucrats to experience. It reminds them who they work for.

        2. ICE is immigration and customs enforcement, why are they investigating threats, regardless of whether or not they were aimed at them? If any other group in society gets threatened, it gets investigated by police, or maybe the FBI. It shouldn’t be any different for agencies whose missions do not encompass investigating threats. It’s ripe for this sort of abuse where the agencies step beyond the law to send a message to people who say things they don’t like. If they’re sincerely threatened, they’re always free to notify the police or FBI like the rest of us.

          The speech here was clearly protected. At the absolute most, it may have justified a talk like you describe, but not by ICE. And obviously we’re in agreement that a raid was ridiculous and completely unjustified. There should be consequences for that, but there won’t be.

          1. Freedom isn’t entirely safe and not without consequences. But it seems to have less of a body count than authoritarianism does. Again, discretion to investigate is one thing, but there better be more to the story before any real action is taken.

      3. I don’t think it was a proportionate response at all. I just think this guy is a fucking idiot.

        1. I 100% support his right to be a fucking idiot and talk shit.

        2. Of course, but jackbooted thugs gonna jackboot.

  3. …the Palestinian protesters were upset over today’s U.S. Embassy opening in Jerusalem.

    Real estate concerns reign supreme.

  4. The average gasoline price in America are expected to soon reach $3 per gallon again.

    Yet the cost of gaslighting the American citizenry keeps getting lower and lower.

    1. Those gaslights are powered by good old American natural gas another reason to love fracking.

  5. The problem in Venezuela, which is only arguably more fucked up than ours, is that Maduro is just like Trump.

    John Oliver enlists Wilmer Valderrama to profile a country arguably more fucked up than ours

    1. “arguably”, they say

    2. “Arguably”.

      JFC these people are unhinged.

      1. Do you know who else was unhinged?

        1. Hingey McUnhingederson?

    3. John Oliver is the dumbest of the “woke” “comedians” and that’s saying A LOT

    4. Gotta love British socialists who hate American but refuse to move back to England.

      1. “Love” as in “it’s too bad they don’t accidentally fall in front of a speeding subway”.

        1. Something like that.

          “Mind the gap”.

      2. It’s too taxing to move.

      3. He is a foreigner attempting to influence American politics, why has the Left not denounced him?

    5. “…a moderately exaggerated example of what a government run by an egomaniacal, tone deaf, media-obsessed, authoritarian chow hound can look like….”

      Obo’s out of office and he’s not a chow-hound.

      1. My thoughts exactly.

        And aren’t these same Lefties mourning the death of Marx, whose ideas killed untold millions?

    6. That whole article is fucking sad. These idiots still think they can present political arguments like it’s 2006.

  6. His department said the video shows “only a small segment of the interaction between the suspect and the officer…”

    We missed the part where the cop kneed him in the balls.

  7. Kansas cops can no longer have sex with people in their custody and claim it’s consensual.

    “Was that wrong? Was I not supposed to do that?”

    1. Now the cops have to claim they were raped.

      1. Not giving the cop who handcuffed you a beej is a hate crime.

        1. Fellatio ain’t just a river in Egypt.

  8. Seattle leaders are scheduled to consider a controversial “jobs tax” today.

    When will these people stop with their sin taxes?

    1. This will be interesting. Honestly I hope they I through with it and both Amazon and Boeing get the hell out of Dodge. The quick financial death of Seattle would be a good example of Socialism destroying a city, except for one filed with white people. No racism excuses or blaming the CIA. Seattle would have committed suicide all on its own.

      1. The only downside is that the people who kill Seattle will eventually bring their virus elsewhere.

        1. Yeah, that is true. The people who voted for this crap will move elsewhere, and try to change their new location into the same place they had to leave. No lessons will be learned.

      2. Boeing’s HQ moved to Chicago some years ago.

        1. Huh, they are still a big employer in Seattle though. If thistax goes through. I imagine they’ll go through the experience of moving everything left over in the city.

          1. Companies would be wise to locate in places that work for them long term, rather than taking the highest bribe.

          2. Boeing has that airfield in Seattle but I am sure Seattle will love to confiscate that land for a homeless tent area.

            1. Are you thinking about the manufacturing facility in Everett? That’s not Seattle. Seattle’s public airport is another story. Perhaps they should rename it Skid Row.

              1. Last time that I was in Seattle, the Boeing hangar had a runway next to it. Boeing Field. It shows up on Google maps.

                North of the Sea-Tac airport.

                1. What’s left of Boeing there is the plant.

  9. I’ll be damned, for decades presidents have been promising to do the move the embassy to Jerusalem and not doing it, and Trump actually did it.

    A politician actually doing the things he said he was going to do? I know most people must find that concept impossible to even wrap their heads around, because it almost never happens.

    1. Yeah, moving the embassy was a lay-up and no one in the USA actually gives a fuck except for a bunch of Fundie-Nut End Timer Jebus Freaks.

      Where is the border wall?

      1. There already is a border wall.

        Upgrades to the border wall and filling in gaps are underway.

        MAGA!

      2. Well, he’s not a Supreme Dictator and can’t do everything he wants to unilaterally like your venerated messiah the Negro Nixon tried to do.

      3. “Yeah, moving the embassy was a lay-up and no one in the USA actually gives a fuck except for a bunch of Fundie-Nut End Timer Jebus Freaks.”

        Well, you’re wrong. I’m an atheist and I care because it’s a decision between Israel and the USA. The Fundie Nuts are the ones protesting. You can see that, right?

        1. Yes, the Islamic Fundie-Nuts are the ones protesting over there. I dislike Islam more than I do our Fundie-Nut Christers.

          And for the record I don’t know why idiot progressives lose their liberal values when it comes to Islam but not Xtianity.

          1. Explain why anyone would protest the USA having their embassy in Jerusalem if not for fundie religious reasons.

            1. Why should I?

              I’ve already called the Islamic protesters fundamentalist nuts. It shouldn’t matter to them but they think they are entitled to something they’re not.

              1. “Why should I?”

                Well, there’s assholes suffering from TDS also.

              2. I thought your statement:
                “Yes, the Islamic Fundie-Nuts are the ones protesting over there”
                was said in sarcasm (it had the cadence of 99% of your sarcastic comments).

                So, you’re admitting that it’s more than just Jebus Freaks who care about the location of the embassy?

                1. So, you’re admitting that it’s more than just Jebus Freaks who care about the location of the embassy?

                  Yes, but my OP said no one “IN THE USA” except Fundie Nuts Jebus Freaks care.

                  1. And I said I AM AN ATHEIST AND I CARE. BTW, I’m an American. So, maybe you shouldn’t pretend to know what everyone in America thinks, or what everyone in the “Peanut Gallery” thinks. Your pretend Omniscience is the main reason everyone here things you’re so full of shit.

                    1. Your pretend Omniscience is the main reason everyone here things you’re so full of shit.

                      You sure I think that way?

                    2. Touche’

                      Let me restate. His pretend Omniscience is the main reason I think he’s so full of shit.

            2. Explain why anyone would protest the USA having their embassy in Jerusalem if not for fundie religious reasons.

              Explain why anyone would want it moved to there if not for fundie religious reasons.

              1. Embassies are placed in a countries Capitol. Particularly important countries might want additional embassies being opened in certain major cities.

                1. *capital

                  And? so? It’s been in another city for all this time.

                  1. You generally want your embassy in the same city as the people you want your diplomats to talk to. Otherwise, why even bother having an embassy in country?

                    1. Ah! So moving the embassy was all for convenience’s sake and no more. Have I got that right?

      4. I care if it costs us more $0.01 to move. We should have put it too bid and let the Israeli’s and the Arabs compete for who cares more with there money. I did see where Trump said he saved almost a billion dollars in a tweet but a tweet is a tweet and honestly I haven’t seen the specifics yet. But we should have made money on the deal or it is a bad deal for America.

      5. Also sprach Palin’s Buttplug.

    2. This seems like a stupidly obvious move that should have been done ages ago. Sure muslims will scream bloody murder right this moment, but this incident will be completely forgotten by the end of the year. Refusing to do it caused more pain long term, as it gave them something to fight against happening.

    3. and Trump actually did it

      And only a few dozen people died as a result! #winning

  10. In New York City, “black people were arrested on low-level marijuana charges at eight times the rate of white, non-Hispanic people over the past three years,” according to a New York Times analysis.

    Yes, but that’s only because the whole system runs a lot smoother against non-whites.

    1. It’s good to know that white people are still the standard unit of measure.

    2. But the South is more racist than those “enlightened” Yankees…yeah right.

      1. This isn’t about race. Don’t fall into the author’s “make-everything-about-race” trap.

        1. I know. Its fun to fuck with those race baiters.

          I visited Stone Mountain this weekend in Georgia. It has General Robert E. Lee, President Jefferson Davis, and General Stonewall Jackson on the side of the giant slab of granite. A bunch of black, white, Asian, and brown people were there checking out the sites and staying for the laser show.

          Some of that racist granite was used to build the Lincoln memorial in Washington DC.

  11. Too many jobs in China lost. Commerce Department has been instructed to get it done!

    The Dotard is picking winners and losers – in fucking China. I remember when the Peanut Gallery went ballistic because Obama fined BP for shitting up the Gulf of Mexico with crude oil.

    1. I wonder when Butt will convince China NOT to pick winners and losers?

    2. Well, the Dotard certainly picked you as a loser.

  12. The average gasoline price in America are expected to soon reach $3 per gallon again.

    Time to fire up those shale extractors again!

  13. “The kind of language expressed…even in an allegedly joking manner, is reckless and irresponsible,” she tells Splinter News. “It potentially puts at risk those who have taken an oath to uphold the law and protect public safety.”

    As everyone who chooses to follow a comedian on Twitter knows, comedians never use Twitter to tell jokes. Ever.

    1. For given level of “joke” and “comedian”.

      1. Sure, but that’s not relevant.

  14. My colleague Mike Allen, who has spent nearly 20 years covering the White House, says we learn more about what’s going on inside the Trump White House in a week than we did in a year of the George W. Bush presidency…

    The data isn’t in yet to make an Obama transparency comparison.

    1. The Obama Administration the press everything they wanted the press to know.

      It was not their fault that the press was more interested in licking Obama’s manure encrusted boots.

    2. “The data isn’t in yet to make an Obama transparency comparison.”

      It was redacted.

  15. Since we’re playing the race card already, what is the ratio of blacks smoking pot in public compared to whites?

    1. RAYSIS!

    2. Like with most disparities, a lot of it is due to the natural higher presence of police officers in areas with high violent crime and property crimes. Yes, black men are killed by cops at 2.5X the rate of white men, but they also commit murder at 7.5X the rate of white men. Anybody who doesn’t think those two things are related is blind.

      1. Like with most disparities, a lot of it is due to the natural higher presence of police officers in areas with high violent crime and property crimes.

        But this particular one is due to the fact that white people, overall –no matter how loud they are about being pot smokers– tend to be way more secretive about smoking than either black people or Hispanic people.

  16. “It prompted him to start asking White House leakers why they do what they do”

    The fact that this is a real question by a reporter speaks to how absolutely horrible journalists are at their job nowadays.

  17. “Israeli troops killed at least 37 Palestinian civilians and wounded several dozen others who were peacefully protesting near the Gaza border Monday. Along with general occupation complaints, the Palestinian protesters were upset over today’s U.S. Embassy opening in Jerusalem.”

    I bet peaceful.

    Imagine Palestine became a country the ruckus who go to eleventy.

    1. Anti-semites fighting anti-semties over an ancient semitic area.

    2. The numbers are from “Gaza’s Hamas-run Health Ministry”.

      1. Totes legit.

      2. Ah, yep, i expected as much. Seems all these incidents that stretch belief start at places like this.

    3. If you visit the article you can scroll down and see pictures of the peaceful demonstrators peacefully throwing rocks – almost certainly in peaceful self-defense. There’s also the story that the peaceful demonstrators intended to peacefully tear down the border fence and were warned by the IDF that approaching the fence would result in death, the peace of the grave. So thankfully everybody involved was peaceful.

      1. In the holy land, the phrase
        “kill them all, let god sort it out”
        Is par for the course.

      2. I just came here to ask if the peacefulness of the demonstrators included rock-throwing. I knew that I risked looking silly if it turned out the IDF was just shooting palestinians at random (which they do all the time /sarc).

        What does a mob have to do to stop being “peaceful”? Wear MAGA hats?

        1. At least with US mobs, the media says *mostly* peaceful. As in “most of them weren’t smashing windows and attacking police.” The the media at least concedes that there were non-peaceful elements embedded in the crowd of peaceable Quaker flower-children.

      3. I was wondering about the “peaceful” part.

      4. And peacefully flying firebombs over the border fence on kites.

        1. ENB apparently has a very special definition of “peaceful”.

  18. In such a “deeply tribal” atmosphere, writes Sullivan, “the individual is always subordinate to the group” and “the ‘I’ is allowed only when licensed by the ‘we.'”

    That doesn’t sound like elitism.

    1. Yep, you ain’t nothing.

  19. It potentially puts at risk those who have taken an oath to uphold the law and protect public safety.

    I wonder if they throw the Constitution in the mix anywhere there.

    1. Getting out of bed in the morning potentially puts them at risk.
      Staying in bed in the morning potentially puts them at risk.
      Life is risky. Eventually you die.
      They need to suck it up or move to padded cells.

  20. Israeli troops killed at least 37 Palestinian civilians and wounded several dozen others who were peacefully protesting

    Cops in the US have some competition for most authoritarian assholes in the world.

    1. Only until America’s liberal-libertarian alliance withdraws subsidies for Israel’s right-wing belligerence. Without America’s political, economic, and military skirts to hide behind, Israel’s authoritarianism wouldn’t be much of a factor.

    2. To be fair, socialists and their Nazi brethren are definitely the most authoritarian assholes in the world.

      1. Mao might disagree.

        1. Tens of millions of Chinese put in the ground by Mao’s policies might agree.

    3. Except that “peacefully” is pure BS.

  21. “Polarization in “Real America” pales in comparison to tribalism among elites.”

    No need for scare quotes around Real America. I assure you that the beliefs and complaints of your buddies in DC are not at all in common with people outside of that city.

    1. Are you “sure”?

      Reason: We make Fake Drinks!

  22. The left, left-libertarians and proggy civil libertarians sure were dead silent on Rakem Balogun until they were forced to blame Trump and the NRA (not the FBI #Resistance) when a UK rag, out of sync with the American progressive narrative, ran a story about it. It’s like they’re really uncomfortable with Black men ownin uns or something.

    1. “Civil libertarians” have done an awfully good job at thoroughly discrediting themselves during the Trump era. And if you expect those people to defend the 2nd Amendment you are beyond naive.

    2. I linked that story last week. None of the Peanuts care when a black guy’s rights are denied.

      1. To be fair, you left out that Democrats started the KKK, Jim Crowe laws, and fought for slavery.

        1. Here – one of your fellow Nazis is leading the GOP Senate candidate primary in CA.

          https://goo.gl/fnwRps

          He dismisses the Holocaust as fiction, saying the “internment camps that the Germans had for the Jews ? were far more luxurious than the internment camps we had here in California for the Japanese during the war.”

          The Auschwitz concentration camp was a country club at which Jews lived in style, he says.

          “They had ice cream, swimming pools, orchestras, plays, they had soccer fields, soccer teams. They even had a whorehouse!” he exclaims. “I mean, shit, I’d like to take a vacation at Auschwitz.”

          1. So a Democrat?

            1. That’s all there is in California.

            2. No, he is a Republican like all Nazi and Neo-Nazis, you idiot.

              1. We call them RINOs Butt.

                They say they are Republicans to act different but they are not any different than Democrats.

          2. Well I read the link about about the racist running for senate in CA.
            What an a horrific asshole.

            I’d be surprised to see anyone here endorsing him.

            1. I assure you that most of the Peanut Gallery would vote for the Nazi over Diane Feinstein.

              1. “I assure you that most of the Peanut Gallery would vote for the Nazi over Diane Feinstein.”

                And I assure you that turd would vote for Stalin AND Mao over Trump.

              2. I don’t need your assurances. I really doubt it. Someone who says Auschwitz was a Jewish country club is evil beyond measure. You are a bit deranged in your assessment of the people who comment here.

              3. Diane Feinstein IS a Nazi.

                Feinstein thinks all non-white people are bad and wants government to control the means of production.

              4. The only way you can justify voting for Feinstein is putting her up against a “Nazi”, apparently. She is a horror.

    3. #BLM never raised a peep about Mr. Balogun.

  23. ICE agents turn out to be authoritarian jerks just as reprehensible as drug warriors. It will be a great day when every one of these lousy people are forced to abandon an authoritarian, cruel mission and instead to try to find a decent livelihood.

    If your child is an ICE agent or drug warrior, you are a failed parent who raised a deplorable, substandard human being.

    Carry on, clingers.

    So far as your lousy educations, bigoted souls, stale thinking, and hick towns can carry anyone, that is.

    1. What were you doing this weekend Mary? You barely even showed up at all!

  24. “President Xi of China, and I, are working together to give massive Chinese phone company, ZTE, a way to get back into business, fast. Too many jobs in China lost. Commerce Department has been instructed to get it done!”

    It was the Trump administration’s decisions that made ZTE insoluble. Trump issued an order banning American companies from shipping components to ZTE. If he’s reconsidering those anti-free trade decisions, that may not be a bad thing from a libertarian perspective.

    If this is all part of ongoing negotiations over North Korea’s nuclear program and is, in fact, the price of China’s continued support in bringing that to an end, then this could be a great thing.

    “North Korea Plans to Destroy Nuclear Test Site Ahead of Trump Summit
    Tunnels at testing ground will be closed by explosion, facilities to be removed, Pyongyang says”

    http://www.wsj.com/articles/no…..1526155666

    1. Years ago, my football fan nephew and I were discussing the big story in the sporting world – which team was going to draft Brian Bosworth? We were in agreement that “The Boz” was a fat-headed hot dog nowhere near as good as he thought he was and we pitied the team dumb enough to draft that jackass. Of course, it turned out to be my Seahawks who drafted him and my nephew began crowing about how I was now going to have to start talking about how great Bosworth is now that he was a Seahawk. But nope, I stood by my assertion that Bosworth was a jackass and the Seahawks were jackasses to have drafted him. My nephew allowed as how he was enough of a fan that if his team drafted a player he hated, he would then start cheering the guy just because of the uniform he was wearing, suggesting that I wasn’t a true Seahawks fan if I would question their judgment in making decisions I personally thought were stupid.

      I have no idea why that just popped in my head.

      1. Ruptured blood vessel maybe?

      2. I admit that I’m hopeful that Trump is wildly successful in his bid to close down North Korea’s nuclear program–even if I disagree with his using trade policy as a way to pressure China into using their influence to make that happen.

        Whether I like it or not, that’s what Trump appears to be doing, and whether I like it or not, what he’s doing appears to be working.

        I suppose some people really do hope that North Korea makes Trump look like a fool–because they care more about Trump looking like a fool than they do about the threat of ICBMs and nuclear weapons to the United States.

        I’m not one of those people. I condemned Trump for his trade policy. I would never use trade policy the way Trump has–and I hope he proves me wrong about that. For the good of the USA, I hope I’m wrong. If I’m somebody who will root for my team even if I don’t like the play the quarterback calls, I guess that just makes me a loyal American. If Barack Obama had achieved an end to the nuclear threat from Iran, I’d have been happy about that–no matter what other team you think Trump and Obama play for, I’m always rooting for the security of the United States from nuclear ICBMs. I guess I’m just an ass that way.

        1. P.S.

          I opposed the Iraq War.

          I thought it would be a humanitarian disaster.

          I thought it would play to Iran’s hegemony in the region.

          I thought it might be a quagmire.

          I hoped I was wrong about that.

          I hoped that democracy would bloom in the desert like an oasis, spread to all the other despotic regimes in the region, that the war would pay for itself, and that the Muslim world would subsequently embrace freedom, democracy, capitalism, and pluralism.

          I often hope I’m wrong.

          1. Your arguments are too well thought out to be wrong much.

  25. Trump blew up at homeland security chief over border security

    Washington (CNN)President Donald Trump and Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen got into a lengthy, heated argument during a Cabinet meeting focused on immigration Wednesday, a source with knowledge of the blowup told CNN.

    Trump was furious with Nielsen, telling her he didn’t think she was doing enough to secure the border. But Nielsen stood her ground, citing the law in certain instances, the source said.
    A separate White House official confirmed that Trump exploded over immigration in front of the Cabinet. The official described the remarks as “angry and heated” but also as fairly typical for Trump on this issue.

    TRUMP DON’T LIKE NO LAWS!

    1. “a source with knowledge of the blowup told CNN.”

      That CNN sure does have great sources.

      There was never any sources in the White House during Obama’s presidency but Make America’s sources Great Again!

      1. Peak transparency has been achieved.

  26. Over the weekend, I had this awful experience. I accidentally stepped in some Tampa Bay Lightning.

    My dog started covering its nose and howling in disgust when I brought those shoes into the house.

    I tried scraping the Tampa Bay Lightning out of my shoes, but that didn’t get rid of the smell. I tried soaking it in bleach. Still no good.

    Suffice it to say, Tampa Bay Lightning stinks.

    1. The unsuitable for human habitation heat and humidity must be getting to them.

      1. The Caps do better on the road.

        I think the expectations of losing in the playoffs get to them during games. Now that the crowd smells blood, I’m hoping that will change.

        Hate to look at the next round already, but if one of Winnipeg’s biggest pluses is their home ice advantage, then I might rather play them than the Golden Knights.

        They put out a statistic last night saying that since 1975, semi-final teams that go up 2-0 are 39-2 in taking the series.

        And if the Caps have any advantage at all, it’s that they really want it. You can just tell.

    2. The Hockey Gods love to use the randomness and chaos of hockey to smite the souls of hockey fans who demonstrate cockiness related to the recent performance of their team. 2-2 series incoming………

      1. Cockiness? You think Caps fans are cocky?

        Cocky as in sure they’re going to win?

        Caps fans are the opposite of that. Before the playoffs, they were sure they were going to lose.

        We’ve been confident we would win before. It always ended in tears.

        This time seems to be different, but I still think that the reason the Caps play worse at home is because the air in Caps stadium expects failure.

        1. I guess I misunderstood your trash-talking the Lightning as cockiness.

          I’m an Astros fan – my family moved to Houston in the middle ’70s when I was in high school – and I won’t bore you with their loooooong history of playoff near-misses, but it’s very similar to the Caps only it dates back to 1980. Last year’s playoff run should have been glorious fun, but instead it was a march of misery – waiting for the gut punch that was surely coming. When they recorded the final out, I didn’t know what to do. Just stood there in front of the TV like “so, what happens now?”.

          My hockey team got eliminated last week, so now I’m probably on team Ovi. Why not let him lift the cup after all the crap he’s taken for playoff stuff that wasn’t his fault? May you experience that moment of glorious confusion when Charlie Brown’s foot finally makes contact with the football…….

          1. Mike Scott was a cheater!

            1. Yeah, but he was really fuckin’ good at it. He was so far up in the Mets’ heads that it would have taken a chain saw to remove him.

            2. Somewhere in my archives, I have a contract he signed allowing the makers of Wiffle Balls to use his image on the box.

        2. Caps will blow it.

          Signed pessimistic caps fan

          But yeah they do look good.

        3. Caps will blow it.

          Signed pessimistic caps fan

          But yeah they do look good.

        4. Caps will blow it.

          Signed pessimistic caps fan

          But yeah they do look good.

    3. The euphemisms have gotten completely out of hand.
      I assume a ‘Tampa Bay Lightning’ is worse than a Rusty Trumpet?
      Maybe a Rusty Tuba?

      1. Rusty Tulpa

      2. Rusty Tulpa

  27. No, Bari Weiss Isn’t Glorifying the “Dark Web”

    Fun fact: Bari Weiss used to date Kate McKinnon.

    *unzips*

    1. I like how an article needs to be printed to reassure progressives that nobody is applauding the dissenters.

      1. They didn’t even need to write this. They could have just linked to Welch’s article on Jordan Peterson to reassure them. Peterson is so evil for resisting speech laws.

        1. lol @ you making everything about the TreasonNN staff

          1. So you expected the NYT to be more nuanced than Welch? I guess I should have lower expectations

        2. I get the feeling that you believe the Reason staff has something against Jordan Peterson.

          1. No. I think they have a bias against commentators that are popular among conservatives. And I didn’t know much about Peterson when Welch wrote the article, but then I listened to some of his stuff online and listened to an interview that he did with Ben Shapiro. They guys seems boring as hell. I can’t gather why people are so critical of him and find him to be so controversial. He made me fall asleep.

            1. Seems like such an odd thing to constantly harp on.

              1. Seems like I’ve mentioned it a total of two times. Each time contrasting the uproar over Weiss’s piece to Welch’s take.

                This act you do is really tiring

                1. You’re honestly saying this is only the second time you’ve called out Matt’s article about Peterson? Ok, I guess.

                  1. Yes. Two times.

                    However, your little act occurs every day multiple times a day. You’re like a slightly more retarded Hihn.

                    1. You can be such a crybaby sometimes. Holy shit.

  28. Cinco de Mayo was started by Mexican-Americans in California in 1863 so it’s a completely American cultural celebration.

    1. Cinco is a Spanish word and I think Mayo was invented by French.

      1. So we can blame the Frogs for everything? Good.

    2. Well, as an America “holiday,” I suppose. There is some acknowledgement of it in a couple of Mexican states, and I think it used to be a bigger holiday years ago. But their Independence Day is about casting out the Spanish overlords, not the French.

      1. To paraphrase Bruce Willis’s girlfriend in Pulp Fiction:
        “Every day is a good day to shit on the French”

  29. Pretty lame of ICE and can only hope heads roll (figuratively) over it.

    That said, the opening comment about the feds making prog college kids “look like George Carlin” is ridiculous. It feels like another attempt by Reason to create a sense or moral equivalency between prog college lefties ‘tards and…well…anyone else.

    The prog college lefties indeed have not put anyone in jail, but they certainly have ruined quite a few peoples lives and businesses, and for a lot longer than 5 months. They 100% aspire to normalize their speech policing well beyond college campuses (and indeed its working, at many HR departments at large companies) and undermine the 1st amendment. We’ll see proposals banning hate speech soon. They are a serious long term threat vs some dopey Feds who can and should be fired.

    1. It feels like another attempt by Reason to create a sense or moral equivalency between prog college lefties ‘tards and…well…anyone else.

      Reason probably spent all weekend work-shopping that line in order to push their cosmo agenda.

    1. Tastes that differ from yours?

      1. That’s called “bad taste.”

  30. Lmao Homeland Security just busted down my door over a joke

    To be fair, it was a pretty retarded joke.

    1. That’s why Homeland Security did something retarded. To retardeds make it not retarded or something

      1. It’s retarded all the way down.

        1. Homeland Security is clearly more epic in its retardness here, though. Unbelievably retarded

          1. It’s amazing how much more retardation you can attain when you have a monopoly on violence.

            1. They should build some hotels on it!

              1. That’s a terrible joke. Who are you, my uncle?

    1. All i’m’a say is that Milan Kundera was right.

      1. Donald Glover is bisexual?

    2. I don’t get the song, and I don’t get the parody of the song.

      1. Check out this crackety-ass cracker over here.

      2. Hey Whitey, put down your cheese and mayo sandwich, step out of your privileged safe space, and open your eyes to what is going on in our society.

        1. Does this help? Go Dolphins!

    3. It’s a good song, despite the preachiness

      1. Yeah, but the rest of Carli Rae Jepsen’s catalog is pretty insipid.

        1. Well played

      2. I like it. I love it’s usage in the end of Mouth Silence too. Which is just a great, great mashup album.

      3. I like it. I love it’s usage in the end of Mouth Silence too. Which is just a great, great mashup album.

  31. The U.S. Supreme Court opened the door for legalized sports betting.

    States can legalize sports gambling, the Supreme Court ruled. The 7-2 ruling strikes down the 1992 federal anti sports gambling law.

    This story will be updated as more information becomes available.

    Great news.

    1. Particularly for someone who doesn’t pay his losses.

      1. oh, snapity snap

    2. How much is that Vig on the bet you failed to pay?

  32. Too many jobs in China lost. Commerce Department has been instructed to get it done!

    Chop chop!!

  33. Continued from Friday:

    Mikey stared at Weigel staring at the empty computer screen, and back at him. He stepped into the light.
    “You…I know you….,” whispered Weigel. “You have been watching me….following me. I saw you on the metro, in the store once, I think…..what do you want???”
    Involuntarily, Mikey’s eyes flicked down to the keyboard underneath the empty computer screen. It was a rapid and subte movement of the eyes, but Weigel caught it and followed it. It was then that he noticed to cock ring sitting on the keyboard. Mikey watched Weigel’s face transition through several expressions, starting with confusion and ending with understanding.

    Weigel’s head snapped back in Mikey’s direction, and, without hesitation, he pounced.

    1. Off topic, but how can someone identify a “cock ring” from just an earring? You know what, I don’t want to know

      1. One is a piece of jewelry with a peg that fits through a previously-made hole in the lobe of the ear. The other is a (usually) silicone rubber ring just big enough to fit around a penis and snug enough to prevent that penis from ejaculating. Source: almost the entire Internet

        1. Alright, thank you for that insight. I guess

          1. Now you know, and you will never again not know. Feel free to divide the accounting of your life accordingly.

        2. I just use the weighted donut from the on-deck circle. It’s a bit snug but I make it work.

    2. With a predatory leap, like a hungry jaguar launching himself at a stunned peccary, Weigel landed on Mikey, pushing him into the table behind. Mikey was bigger, and more muscled. But years of carrying water for Obama made Weigel surprisingly strong. His wiry arms wrapped around Mikey, his head ducking under Mikey’s arm, pushing Mikey down onto the table with a bear hug. Mikey fought back, wild, desperate, his whole body trying to shake Weigel off. Their struggle made them travel down the side of the table, Mikey’s arms flailing, sweeping and knocking things to the floor while trying to grasp onto anything that could be used as a weapon. His hands grabbed and released and flung to the floor one by one the various items sprawled across the table: a big bottle of Alex Jones’s Super Male Vitality, an autographed and framed picture of Milo that Mikey hasn’t gotten around to hanging up, a grimy MAGA hat, a half-finished potato carving with a relief of people Mikey would like on Mount Rushmore…..

      1. Finally, Mikey’s hand closed over a hefty copy of the Turner Diaries. Instinctively, Mikey’s hand swung back, tried to clobber Weigel’s head. Weigel, who was biting his neck, caught the book in his mouth. Like a terrier dispatching a rat, Weigel’s had shook vigorously from side to side, ripping the book apart. Pages from the Turner Diaries filled the air, and slowly descended down, like autumn leaves in a breeze, or late spring snow on an alpine meadow. Time seemed to slow down, all the colors intensified, and Mikey felt as if he was in a Zhang Yimou movie.

        Then time sped up, and Mikey felt himself falling, tripping over something on the floor. No, he was tripping over his pants, which were somehow around his ankles. He landed on the floor, and he felt Weigel on top of him, fumbling, then….a snap.

        1. Mikey fought with all his might, but he did not make a sound. He felt the blood beating in his throat, in his eyes, the hatred building, the terror mounting in his blood. He fought in a last convulsion. There was a lightning bolt of pain. He felt his heart in his ears, thump, thump, thump. Then he realized it was the sound of his head repeatedly hitting the leg of the table.

          It was an act that could be performed in tenderness, as a seal of love, or in contempt, as a symbol of humiliation and conquest. It could be the act of a lover or the act of a soldier violating an enemy woman. Weigel did it as an act of scorn, as defilement. And this made him lie still. One gesture of tenderness from Weigel, and he would have remained cold, untouched by what was being done. But the act of a master taking shameful, contemptuous possession was the kind of rapture he has been craving. Then he lay still. He lay still long after the he heard the door slam shut.

          1. But years of carrying water for Obama made Weigel surprisingly strong.

            Oh hee hee, man. Fine work.

            1. Obviously, the last paragraph is an homage to The Fountainhead, for the phillistines that didn’t pick up on that. I am sure Hank will be by with a diatribe of how I am desecrating a holy work.

          2. I’m not really into Harlequin Romance style short stories, but this was pretty entertaining. Do you have a working title? Something like Fifty Shades of Weigel? Or maybe Wollt Ihr Das Bett In Flammen Sehen?

          3. The Turner Diary part is a little much

          4. A little too much plagiarism in the last entry.

        2. Peccary was the best part.

  34. ICE Press Secretary Jennifer Elzea has at least confirmed that the agency opened an investigation into Flores after reading his tweets (no word from Elzea on the alleged apartment visit). “The kind of language expressed…even in an allegedly joking manner, is reckless and irresponsible,” she tells Splinter News. “It potentially puts at risk those who have taken an oath to uphold the law and protect public safety.”

    “Furthermore, we at the ICE do not have a sense of humor that we’re aware of.”

  35. …while the government had kept him locked up for the crime of expressing an affection for guns?and opinions the deep state didn’t like?he lost his car, job, home, and the opportunity to witness the first year of his newborn’s life.

    On the plus side, his life story is now the makings of a kick ass country song.

  36. “wounded several dozen others who were peacefully protesting”

    I din’t know rock throwing and tire burning while threatening to kill Isralies was considered peacefull

    1. Over there it is.

  37. Lmao Homeland Security just busted down my door over a joke

    Was he really LMAO?

    1. Does anyone ever do that?

  38. I’m all for abolishing ICE. But this tweet wasn’t funny at all. It was ‘reckless and irresponsible’ – I agree. In no way does this help the cause.

  39. reckless and irresponsible

    Busting in someone’s door is safe and responsible.

    1. Just because a jokester tweeted they “busted down my door” doesn’t mean it happened. It could be another of his hilarious jokes.

      If they did, pox on them.

    2. The moment someone says “I’m a comedian, I was joking” their credibility on anything they say goes to zero forever.

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