Brickbats

Brickbat: Crappy Behavior

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Have to go
Anton Estrada / Dreamstime.com

Kenilworth, New Jersey, schools superintendent Thomas Tramaglini has been charged with public defecation, lewdness, and littering after being caught on video pooping at the Holmdel High School football field and track. School officials say they set up surveillance cameras after finding human feces at or near the field almost daily.

NEXT: The Tyranny of the Administrative State

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  1. I don’t understand the problem. Everyone knows that all of New Jerksey is basically a toilet.

    1. I don’t understand the problem, either. I mean, the pubic at large is telling our educrats to give a shit, please!!!

      Here’s an educrat that finally, for once, gave a shit, and we PUNISH him for it?!?!?

      WTF!?!?!

      1. ^ This

      2. Yeah, but when has the public at large really known what they want? That’s why everything should be left to TOP. MEN. to decide. /sarc

    2. My last month paycheck was for 11000 dollars… All i did was simple online work from comfort at home for 3-4 hours/day that I got from this agency I discovered over the internet and they paid me for it 95 bucks every hour…

      This is what I do…. http://www.onlinereviewtech.com

  2. What does a superintendent actually do? I hear the word related to schools all the time, but unlike principle, teacher, janitor. Its not one of those jobs they really discuss.

    1. I had an idea for a t-shirt: safety orange, SUPERVISOR across the back, and an upside-down pocket on the front. Why upside down, everyone would ask? That’s where you put the shovel handle to make it easier to lean on it.

      I imagine a SUPERINTENDENT t-shirt would be the same in spirit, but they don’t lean on shovels, they lean on … principles? teachers? They sure don’t come anywhere near students.

    2. “What does a superintendent actually do?”
      The Superintendent is the top level executive (CEO in business parlance) of the local school district, answerable only to the School Board. The Superintendent may be directly elected or appointed by the school board, depending on how the local school district is set up.

  3. Just move to Frisco.

  4. The story is #2. The picture is #1. But it’s probably hard to find an appropriate stock photo for such things. What search terms would you use? I don’t even know how one searches stock photos. Does Reason have accounts and they use an online search? Is there a safe search you can turn off, or are these stock photo companies all family-friendly only?

    1. It is a rule at reason that the picture not be related to the article.

      1. Eh, it’s not like anybody pays attention to the picture anyway. Unless it’s a hot chick. TIWTANFL.

  5. Why is this even on Reason? Natural right to shit anywhere? Surveillance of sovereign shitters? Government regulation of shitting?

    ACLU Stands Up for “Shit Anywhere” Defendants in Landmark Public Defecation Case, Proposes New Amendent to Constitution

    1. I don’t think the idea here is to defend any right.

      Many Reason stories, especially Brickbats, have focused on the overzealous ineptitude of school officials. They suspend and have arrested kids for such “terrible” behavior as chewing pop tarts into a gun shape, writing a fantasy story about a kid hunting dinosaurs with a rifle, and of course reporting a kid taking a nude selfie for child porn. And here you have one of these sanctimonious officials caught pooping in public on an almost daily basis. There’s irony and schadenfreude in this story.

      1. Lots of schadenfreude. You have to wonder what motivated the guy. Someone probably told him to give a shit, and he just did.

      2. I might say gloating instead of schadenfreude. I enjoy the exposure of a goaler’s misdeeds without any malice.

      3. Fair enough. Somehow I can’t imagine Super Nintendo Chalmers dropping trou and planting a “steamed ham” over by Willy’s shed.

  6. When you gotta go, you gotta go.

  7. the best part about this story may be the fact kenilworth and holmdel are 40 minutes apart.

  8. Whatever else you can say about this superintendent, at least you can’t accuse him of not giving a shit, amirite?

  9. Holy shit, what’s a camera?

    /Thomas Tramaglini

  10. This is clearly a free speech issue. He is saying that the school track team is for shit.

  11. You know who else shit on young people’s hopes and dreams?

    1. You?

    2. Reality? Realities that helicopter moms couldn’t fix?

    3. Coach Thompson? I hate you Coach Thompson.

    4. Tough Titties shit on young people’s hopes and dreams! Titties MUCH tougher than the titties of their helicopter moms!

    5. That guy was Mitch Cumstein, my roommate. He’s a good guy.

  12. When I was in the Navy, the first ship I served on had a Phantom Shitter. He was never caught, not even after leaving a pile on the wardroom table.

    1. It’s always the skipper.

    2. I was assigned to an army unit that had a fellow known as the “psycho shitter”. Dude was not afraid to get his hands dirty, if you know what I mean. Never caught.

    3. Cops report that a fair number of burglars will take a shit in the burgled house before they leave.

    4. DNA analysis of the microbiome of these turds could nail the offender, these days, when the offender is known to belong to a smallish group… All the enlisted troops at barracks XYZ, for example, will have their turds sampled and tested,. and then the offender is… BUSTED!!!

      I’m disgusted!
      You’re busted!
      You can’t be trusted!

    5. I’ve heard about an office phantom shitter at one of the company’s locations but fortunately never discovered his work first hand. Apparently he shits either on the toilet seat or on the floor of the stall. So near, yet so far. At this point if he’s (unlikely to be a she in the mens room) not been caught I would suggest it’s a cleaner or security guy, i.e. someone in the building outside of normal office hours. I’ll fire off an email to HR in the morning to find out if it’s safe to go back there yet.

    6. My ship, too. The USS Cayuga. Or is this just a common thing?

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