Donald Trump

Is Donald Trump Responsible for the Attack on Rand Paul?

Of course not. But don't tell The New Yorker that.

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Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS) has taken hold at The New Yorker. Hence, this idiotic story, which is advertised in a tweet from the magazine's official feed:

The actual story, written by Jeffrey Frank, is a minor classic of snide political-violence tourism, noting that Paul, the libertarian-leaning Republican senator, lives in a gated community in Kentucky and that his attacker, a liberal Democrat, is supposedly a "near-perfect" neighbor, according to a (Republican!) resident. Near-perfect, of course, except for his violent attack on an unsuspecting Paul while he was mowing his lawn. The attack busted the senator's ribs and is, to put it mildly, fucked up. But, says Frank,

Although [Jim] Skaggs was once the chairman of the Warren County Republican Party, he seemed to side with Boucher, whom he called a "near-perfect" neighbor, as opposed to Paul, who, he said, was less willing to go along with the regulations of the homeowners association "because he has a strong belief in property rights."…

The Times reported that Paul grows pumpkins, and composts.

Pumpkins and compost may well be at the root of things. This fall has been unusually warm in Kentucky, and the heat may affect decomposing organic matter in unpleasant, olfactory ways. Paul, who leans toward libertarianism, could well have considered the compost of a private gardener, on private property, to be an inalienable right, and one can sympathize with that view.

Haw haw haw! Frank then dredges up a 1980 novel by Thomas Berger, Neighbors, that was "the basis of an unfunny movie starring John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd," because, well, you know, it's important to remind New Yorker readers that novels exist and are usually better than the movie version, right?

But the real point, of course, is that somehow Donald Trump is responsible for all that is baffling in this world, including an indefensible attack by a "near-perfect" neighbor who is a Democrat against a libertarianish Republican. Frank again:

Berger told the critic Richard Schickel what he'd learned from Kafka: "That at any moment banality might turn sinister, for existence was not meant to be unfailingly genial." The sinister banality of American life periodically moves into view, with a lot of it these days emanating from Donald J. Trump, the person who was elected President, a year ago.

Yeah, sure. Forget that maybe, just maybe, Boucher is responsible for his own sinister banality, whether his reported "feud" with Rand Paul had more to do with lawn-care issues than political ones. Then again, Boucher did post at Facebook his wish, "May Robert Mueller fry Trump's gonads." But isn't that how all doctors—Boucher is an anesthesiologist—talk?

I think there's a real problem with throwing violence perpetrated by individuals onto broad zeitgeist-y forces, partly because doing so minimizes the responsibility we all have for the choices we make and partly because it's so often wrong (remember how all that "right-wing" hate and paranoia in Dallas drove communist-sympathizer Lee Harvey Oswald to plug JFK?). It's a small step from such atrributions to start blaming all sorts of things—books! movies! video games! Trump!—on whatever you happen to find objectionable. Donald Trump does this all the time, blaming immigrants, antifa, you name it for a phantom crime wave, job losses, and more. Do liberals at publications need to join him in such efforts? Of course not, but they're already blaming Trump not only for his misdeeds, but their own as well.

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  1. The Donald Made Me Do It

    1. Everything bad is Trump’s fault. Even if it is better than it was before.

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    2. We are all victims. Barrack made me do it!

    3. “Things got a little out of hand. It’s just this war and that lying son of a bitch Johnson and?I would never hurt you. You know that. “

      1. Nice follow through Wesley!

  2. It’s society’s fault. The devil made me do it.

    It’s all just looking to blame someone else so the perp can be the victim.

    It ignores the concept of personal responsibility and the idea that people actually have a choice in their actions.

  3. Wait. Some neighbor kicks sand in poor little Randal’s face and therefore The Republican Don who memorized their entire platform is to blame?

    1. Randal’s property rights apparently supersede the HOA he signed.

      He is a bad-ass libertarian like that.

      1. Apparently there was an out clause in the HOA agreement. Rather than file a complaint with the HOA review board when you think your neighbor grows his trees too high, you can just make a direct aggravated assault and send him to the hospital to rethink his gardening decisions.

        1. Surely you’re not trying to school “The Plug” on libertarianism? He’s the only person to score more than 100% on the purity test. Don’t you know he’s the most ibertarian-ist libertarian EVAR?!

          1. I thought he only got 8%.

            1. Never gets tired…

          2. Yes I know all of this, but sometimes it’s hard to stop.

            And don’t call me Shirley.

      2. But is he badass enough to welsh on a bet after being humiliated?

      3. I’m curious: how does being a snotty little cunt every waking minute work out for you in your daily life?

        -jcr

      4. Retarded fascist buttplug supports violence, who would’ve guessed.

    2. Kicked sand hard enough to break 6 ribs?

      1. Some people are deeply invested in trying to portray a tough guy persona over the internet.

    3. Even for you, Hank, that is absurdly stupid.

  4. Neighbors, that was “the basis of an unfunny movie starring John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd

    I love that movie. Underrated, imo.

    1. The bad neighbor gag got old but it was very funny for about an hour.

      “Are you trying to pork my wife?”

      1. Shreek’s favorite Belushi is Jim.

    2. I seem to remember laughing at it…winter of 1988-89?

  5. Near-perfect, of course, except for his violent attack on an unsuspecting Paul while he was mowing his lawn.

    “I, uh, don’t think it’s quite fair to condemn a whole program because of a single slip-up, sir.”


  6. I think there’s a real problem with throwing violence perpetrated by individuals onto broad zeitgeist-y forces, partly because doing so minimizes the responsibility we all have for the choices we make and partly because it’s so often wrong

    So you’re telling me collectivist ethos are blind to the actions and opinions of an individual? Get outta’ town!

    /sarc

  7. HOAs and property rights absolutists don’t seem to be a good mix.

    1. Seem reasonable to me. Contract law is something even the AnCaps stand strongly for. Seems like a bum deal to me though.

    2. HOAs tend to be magnets for petty tyrants and their sympathizers, and the Pauls have a history of pestering both.

      1. My friend ran for HOA president and won on the platform of not having any more HOA meetings.

        1. Spectacular. It would be even better if he convened one more meeting to dissolve the HOA.

    3. If you bought your property subject to an HOA convenient, you never owned the right to ignore the HOA.

      I am always amazed at how many Libertarians don’t understand property rights. There is no magic bundle of rights that come with owning property. What it means to “own something” can vary based on what you buy. Owning property is just owning a bundle of rights to use. The size of that bundle may vary.

      There is not anything inconsistent with voluntary HOA’s and even the most absolute view of property rights.

      1. If you bought your property subject to an HOA convenient, you never owned the right to ignore the HOA. There is not anything inconsistent with voluntary HOA’s and even the most absolute view of property rights.

        Libertarians understand this perfectly. It just that HOAs and those who are the most active in creating and enforcing those covenants often fly in the face of the reflexive disgust we have for petty tyrants and our tendency to celebrate the bending and breaking of rules we find to be unjust or which encroach upon somebody’s personal autonomy.

        The HOA can implement whatever rules they like, but we’ll still call them assholes for choosing such rules.

        1. You can call them that. But it is hard to see how someone is an asshole for enforcing rules everyone agreed to create. Does liking everyone to have fences set back from their property line or not have a detached garage because it looks better make you an asshole? I don’t see how.

          Again, if you don’t like the rules, don’t agree to them.

          1. Does liking everyone to have fences set back from their property line or not have a detached garage because it looks better make you an asshole?

            Usually it depends on the rules and how they’re enforced, as is typical. I’m not arguing against the HOA is principle, but I’ve heard enough horror stories (and seen what it costs for the privilege of having to endure them) to be glad that I bought in a development which lacks one.

            OTOH, thinking your aesthetic preferences should be at all enforceable on my home is kind of an asshole tendency. Get a life.

          2. The problem is that those rules don’t stay the same. You can agree to a set of rules when you buy the property, but if the HOA board changes them to something less palatable, what’s your recourse – move out of your home?

            1. The most important rules are not changeable by the board. The homeowners have to vote on amendments. You’re still subject to tyranny of the majority, but those votes are rare. In California there’s a worse problem: the legislature passes laws all the time that override HOA provisions.

          3. Again, if you don’t like the rules, don’t agree to them.

            What you’re agreeing to, really, is that the HOA can fine you if you break the rules. If you break the rules and pay the fine the HOA levies, the HOA can’t do fuck all about the rule violation (provided that breaking the rule doesn’t also violate the law in some way.)

            sin,
            Libertarian in a Condo

          4. Well, to start with *not everyone agreed to create those rules*. Even in something as small as an HOA. Its simply that the council had a vote and maybe the majority – not necessarily a large majority let alone an absolute one – of the people *who were there to vote* agreed to bind everyone else to their decision.

            Uber was kicked out of Austin because less than 15% of the population wanted it gone badly enough to stop what they were doing and stand in line for an hour.

          5. First, this has nothing to do with the HOA–that’s the leftist media trying to provide cover.

            That having been said, it’s pretty damned likely that the HOA rules don’t have a provision for their enforcement that included cold-cocking homeowners whose greenspace maintenance and use is not up to par.

            So it’s perfectly valid to call Paul’s attacker an asshole. With or without HOA compliance.

      2. No one actually owns property in the United States of America except the Federal Government. This is known.

        You pay them rent, you just call it ‘property taxes’ to provide the illusion that you own that land.

        This is known.

        1. Too bad if that is not only false but property taxes are paid to towns, not to the fed government

          1. Well, technically he didn’t say that property taxes are paid to the “fed government” (tax-fed? har har) government, merely that nobody but the Federal Government owns property.

            Then, in another paragraph, he said “you pay them rent”, which really could be a nonspecific “them”, i.e. referring to towns, or whoever.

      3. I understand that HOAs are usually a reasonable contractual agreement that limits the rights associated with owning a particular property. But I don’t understand why anyone would ever agree to live under one.

        Which I guess is why I live in the woods in a town where you generally can engage in agriculture, put up auxiliary buildings and keep a bunch of junk in your yard if that’s what you’re into.

        1. But I don’t understand why anyone would ever agree to live under one.

          ?

          Umm…sure you do. Cost and convenience. HOAs are not simply rule setters. They own the cost/maintenance of shared space or potentially even the maintenance of private space. That’s the real benefit. Economy of scale + more free time. The price is the lack of absolute autonomy. It’s a reasonable trade-off in many cases, particularly if you value your free time more than you value autonomy.

          The trick generally is to find an HOA that’s big enough and well established enough such that a few dominant personalities can’t radically shift its operation.

        2. “Which I guess is why I live in the woods in a town where you generally can engage in agriculture, put up auxiliary buildings and keep a bunch of junk in your yard if that’s what you’re into.”

          Exactly. I have enough rules (laws) to govern me. I’m not volunteering for any extras.

    4. Ah, another “I’m a libertarian but I think he deserved to get beaten half to death for growing pumpkins” dipshit had joined the thread.

  8. Berger told the critic Richard Schickel what he’d learned from Kafka: “That at any moment banality might turn sinister, for existence was not meant to be unfailingly genial.”

    I hope Berger was in grade-school when he learned life can be tough, ’cause I don’t know how one attains adulthood without that lesson.

    And Trump is a horrible example for sinister banality, as he is an exceptional/outrageous POTUS in nearly every way.

  9. All violence is self-defense in the Age of Trump.

    1. Channeling ENB I see.

      1. Uh, sure, whatever you say.

        1. Sorry, I posted this before I saw you trying to fuck her.

          1. Can you save us all time and just call her a cuck or a race-traitor and move on? Maybe throw something about cocktail parties in there too, if it suits you. Thanks in advance.

            1. Aw I struck ANOTHER nerve!

            2. Unfortunately, Jordan, he’s retarded. Because of his retaliation, he’ll believe that calling him a retard is actually defending Elizabeth and not flat out calling him a retard.

              1. Please don’t punch me, it’s what your kind does.

              2. “retaliation”

                Is that supposed to say retardation? Did you actually try to call someone a retard, and retardedly fuck it up?

                Ahahahahahahhaahha!!!

                Hoist by your own retard!

                1. Yes, my phone is retarded too.

                  1. Hmmm…

                    The failure to acknowledge the mistake is graceless, especially in light of the obvious but well timed pun.

                    4/10

                    1. The Judge|11.20.17 @ 1:56PM|#

                      Hmmm…

                      The failure to acknowledge the mistake is graceless, especially in light of the obvious but well timed pun.

                      4/10

                      You made a new handle just to give yourself a hand job? How precious.

                    2. Thinks “obvious” is a compliment.

                      2/10

  10. sinister banality

    Nice band name.

    Or college nickname.

    1. I prefer Lecherous Tedium for a band name.

  11. This is why I hate Progressives. They think HOA violations get enforced by breaking the violators ribs. Or something. This isn’t the first story of it’s time to come down the wire. Bad thing happens to conservative or libertarian, but it’s okay because they aren’t 100% following the rules>

    That’s what the Rule of Law means them, that it’s okay to break someone’s ribs because of pumpkin. Fuck.

    1. If you’re a Republican it’s okay to commit treason as long as you look like a pumpkin.

      1. Hmmm….

        I see what you are trying to do there, but you had to go too far to get there and it stinks of desperation.

        3/10

        1. “”I see what you are trying to do there, but you had to go too far to get there and it stinks of desperation.”‘

          That’s what his date said.

      2. Pumpkin is the reason I’m not a Republican anymore. Besides, still no excuse to be going around breaking ribs.

      3. If you’re a Republican it’s okay to commit treason as long as you look like a pumpkin.

        Really, Tony? I cannot stand the Orange Turd-in-Chief, but the claims he committed Treason are baseless at best. Hate that asshole for legitimate reasons, not trumped up bullshit. Or is that too much for that jizz-mop of a Proggie brain of yours?

        1. At least we both agree that Robert Mueller is an unimpeachably credible and will get to the truth of the matter.

          1. “At least we both agree that Robert Mueller is an unimpeachably credible and will get to the truth of the matter.”

            Still looking for that un-paid parking ticket, are you?

          2. Um, no.

  12. The neighbor should’ve slaughtered him like a piggy and then write ‘Rand Paul Skand Paul’ on the wall with blood.

  13. Hillary fantasizes about leaving Earth to be president on another planet

    Clinton said if she was in charge, she would be “putting as much money as it took into enforcing the laws we already have.”

    “Sorry, Madam President, all we have is 50 quatloos.”

    1. “”Clinton said if she was in charge, she would be “putting as much money as it took into enforcing the laws we already have.”””

      But only the laws that affect the peasants.

  14. The Times reported that Paul grows pumpkins, and composts.

    This is a tough one. If Rand Paul composts, he deserved his broken ribs.

    1. I keep hearing that compost is pleasantly earthy-smelling.

      1. If throwing a dead body in your front yard in 90 degree heat for two weeks is earthly-smelling, we agree.

        1. If that’s what your compost smells like, you’re doing it wrong.

          1. Careful, Zeb. Paul’s compost mostly consists of the last guy who tried to tell him how to compost.

            1. CX: I don’t compost my dead bodies, because I have a modicum of respect for my neighbors. They’re dissolved in acid, as God intended.

          2. Of course it’s being done wrong:

            City of Seattle: Throw all of your food waste into this 50 gallon plastic bin and set it in the sun.

      2. My neighbor has a garden that he tills with manure every spring. It makes for a tough couple of days to be his neighbor. Some compost heaps have a similar smell depending on what goes into them.

  15. Paul, who leans toward libertarianism, could well have considered the compost of a private gardener, on private property, to be an inalienable right,

    unlike, say, smoking a cigarette on private property.

  16. it’s important to remind New Yorker readers that novels exist and are usually better than the movie version, right?

    The New Yorker doesn’t go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth.

    1. Somebody used this line on Tony and he was so excited for a chance to use it himself that he couldn’t wait for a time when it would have actually made sense.

      1. Are all libertarians intimidated by books?

        1. Hmmm…

          Failure to acknowledge a good retort is a sign of weak character, and the reply was unfunny and lacks creativity.

          2/10

          1. Appropriately, the phrases “lacks creativity,” “weak character,” “unfunny,” and “failure” will all feature prominently on Tony’s tombstone.

        2. Yes, Tony. Your misreading of Gillespie’s line means everybody else is illiterate. You called that one.

        3. You’re not one to lecture others on literacy, as you’ve demonstrated here enough times.

  17. Every bad thing that has ever happened since the dawn of time is Trump’s fault. IT IS KNOWN. /sarc

  18. Nick! You’re alive!

    And many kudos for catching the New Yorker in the act of being itself, not really a hard thing to do. But what I find both sinister and banal is the silence of the Rand on the whole matter. Recall that Paul’s staff said nothing on the Friday when the attack occurred, then said Paul was “fine” on Saturday–fine with six broken ribs, three of them “unmoored”, so that his flesh was being lacerated by six very large bone fragments. I have this wacky theory that this had, you know, nothing to do with “lawn care”. I don’t think Tony Soprano ever busted six ribs over “lawn care”. I suspect something a little more “basic” was involved.

    What does the senator have to say about all of this? He can talk, can’t he? Or can he?

    1. He “fell off his treadmill”?

      1. I would have paid big money for video of Harry Reid being slung off that treadmill.

    2. The gentlemanly thing to do is to keep private issues private. It’s really no one’s business but the police and the DAs office as to the details of this case.

    3. Nobody deserves to have his ribs broken. But perhaps when the whole story comes out, some people will privately believe that he probably kinda deserved it.

      1. “But perhaps when the whole story comes out, some people will privately believe that he probably kinda deserved it.”

        You won’t bother waiting.

      2. So in other words, you think he deserved it.

        You’re a fascist, by the way. I think you should be reminded of that at least once a day.

      3. So you do agree that punching an anti-fascist is ok then, you know, as long as they’re a big enough dick I in your opinion. Suspension of disbelief must be super easy for you

  19. Seven neighbors in the Rivergreen gated community told Secrets Wednesday that the Pauls are friendly homeowners who kept their property tidy.

    “The Paul’s landscaping looks just like everyone’s place in Rivergreen. Wish I could get him to cut my lawn,” said neighbor Robert Warner. “As a friend, neighbor and senator, Rand has been first class in every way. What I find amazing is the fact that he cuts his own grass. Our neighborhood is fortunate that the Paul’s live here,” he added. …

    “The stories of a ‘landscaping dispute’ or a dispute of any sort between Rand Paul and Rene Boucher are erroneous and unfounded. The reason for Mr. Boucher’s bizarre attack is known only to him. Statements to the contrary are irresponsible and unnecessary,” said neighbor Travis Creed.

    He added, “Speculation regarding Boucher’s motive has led to an unfair characterization of the Pauls and their home. The Pauls are and always have been great neighbors and friends. They take pride in their property and maintain it accordingly. Rand has enjoyed working on and maintaining his lawn for as long as I have known him.”

    http://www.dailywire.com/news/…..seph-curl#

  20. I think the cause is more simple, Paul’s son banged the Dr’s daughter.

  21. Of course he is!
    He’s like Bush; supernovae? Bush did it. Ask Tony and turd.

  22. Other neighbors have cast doubt over the notion this was over a landscaping issue. There was some bad blood between the two.

  23. There I am, mowing my lawn. My neighbor comes over and assaults me from behind, breaking several ribs. He is not a recent, medically retired NFL football player suffering from concussions. There is no reason to forgive him.

  24. “remember how all that “right-wing” hate and paranoia in Dallas drove communist-sympathizer Lee Harvey Oswald to plug JFK?”
    It is funny how fast a left wing Communist tool devolved into a far right hit man.

    1. Trump does that to people.

  25. So a democrat flips out and attacks a republican/libertarian and somehow a former democrat (now a republican) is to blame?

    1. To the New Yorker, Democrats are like puppies and babies: they’re just so cute, but remember they have no moral agency so nothing they do is ever their fault.

  26. I’ve seen all sorts of hair-pulling over Paul supposedly breaking the HOA rules, but I’ve yet to see the specific rule he broke.If he did break the rules, obviously broken ribs ain’t part of the sanctions, but did he? Has anyone seen the rules and noted the one or several he broke?

  27. “Near-perfect, of course, except for his violent attack on an unsuspecting Paul while he was mowing his lawn.”

    Do you not understand the meaning of near-perfect?

  28. Nick, it’s attributions that you’re trying to spell in the least paragraph.

    Y’all really need a spell checker. I’ll do it for just $200k/year. And dental. And I won’t check Shikha’s work. On the flip, I’ll check Kmele’s work for free. That dude is awesome.

  29. ” This fall has been unusually warm in Kentucky, and the heat may affect decomposing organic matter in unpleasant, olfactory ways.”

    Only the idiots who have never seen or had a compost pile would think this is true. Decomposing leaves and grass are not “olfactory” in any way. And growing pumpkins is somehow offensive? To whom? Watermelon farmers? What absurd fantasy world do these idiots live in? These articles give insight into the lack of real world experience of these cloistered journalists that have as much insight into the outside world as a fresh dog turd. Fortunately they have lots of New Yorker magazines to use for pooper scoopers to clean up their presumptuous blabbering.

    1. Growing pumpkins is surprisingly easy. My then-wife decided she didn’t want to bother with actually disposing of the jack-o-lantern she’d carved and put on our front step, so she kicked it off the edge and into the bushes. The next summer she was shocked to discover pumpkin vines in our bushes.

  30. In other news, ENB is telling people to punch Ben Shapiro for not believeing transwomen are not, actually women. Not a good look for an editor for a “libertarian” magazine to call to punch someone because he believes biology and science are more logical than emotions and feelings.

  31. And if somebody clobbers Boucher from behind, it’s the fault of the New York Times for not offering a better speculation about Boucher’s real motives…

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