A.M. Links: Trump to End DACA, Hurricane Irma Heads for Florida, Putin Says Trump Is 'Not My Bride'

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  • Gage Skidmore / Flickr.com

    Attorney General Jeff Sessions is scheduled to give a press conference today addressing President Donald Trump's decision to end Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals, also known as DACA, the Obama executive action offering certain protections for undocumented immigrants that arrived in the U.S. as children.

  • Hurricane Irma is headed for the U.S. and may hit southern Florida this weekend.
  • Vladimir Putin on Donald Trump: "He's not my bride."
  • U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley on North Korea: "The time has come for us to exhaust all of our diplomatic means before it's too late."
  • "South Korea's Asia Business Daily, citing an unidentified source, reported that North Korea had been observed moving a rocket that appeared to be an intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) towards its west coast."
  • Tronc Inc., which publishes the Los Angeles Times and the Chicago Tribune, has acquired the New York Daily News.

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  1. Attorney General Jeff Sessions is scheduled to give a press conference today addressing President Donald Trump’s decision to end Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals…

    Just to put an even eviler face on it.

    1. Hello.

    2. If they want to sell something, they will put Trump out front. If it’s more dickish government shit, Sessions is the perfect guy.

    3. From the summaries I’ve seen, the idea is that the administration proposes to enforce the immigration laws as Congress wrote them, after giving Congress a decent interval to change the laws if they want.

      Unless he’s going to claim the law is unconstitutional, this seems like the President’s duty – if anything he shouldn’t even leave a decent interval of non-enforcement.

      1. Except Congress is already showing that they don’t plan to do shit except kick the can down the road–two House and Senate bills are proposing an act that would provide a three-year delay until something more permanent can be developed.

        Remember how well that worked out with sequestration? That was another can-kicking effort regarding the creation of an actual budget, and the deadline came and went. Anyone believing that Congress is going to propose an actual immigration reform instead of making a hard decision that might get them voted out of office is kidding themselves.

        1. But that is not the President’s issue. The President’s job is to enforce laws. There is no question that the laws are constitutional.

        2. Sure, but there are statutes on the books now, so as long as those statutes are constitutional they should be enforced regardless of what Congress might (or, realistically, might not) do in future.

          1. I suspect that’s not what Trump is going for, though–giving Congress six months to come up with a law that just delays further action for three years is begging for a veto, not enforcement.

            1. I suspect that’s not what Trump is going for, though–giving Congress six months to come up with a law that just delays further action for three years is begging for a veto, not enforcement.

              Looks to me like he is giving Congress every chance to fix the issue since they haven’t done shit yet in years. A deadline does a solid job of making people do things.

        3. That is Congress’ prerogative.

      2. the idea is that the administration proposes to enforce the immigration law

        Those guards were just enforcing German laws as written and approved by the German people.

    4. My morning call to arms was all over this story, complete with teary man on the street interviews and shots of busloads of people who apparently don’t work but are mysteriously able to afford to hire a bus heading to DC to #resist.

      No mention of the fact that laws are expected to go through Congress. No mention of the abject suffering these people must have been under until the minute Obama gave his order.

      1. The predictable call to arms aside, this is really a shit move – the people who signed up for the Dream Act – some of whom did not know their immigration status until they applied for student loans, etc – will have the fact that they signed up for the Act, an admission of their guilt – used against them. Essentially, they trusted the government by admitting that they were here illegally, and if Trump rescinds the executive order they are fucked.

        1. they trusted the government

          Oops.

          1. Yep.

            They trusted government, not knowing how our government works. Live by the EO, die by the EO.

            Congress creates laws. Any EO the prez issues is not law and can be rescinded by a future president.

            1. Actually it was not the government, but Obama who screwed them. The government consists of Congress, President and the Courts. Just having one making a decision is not enough.

            2. But in fairness, I’d have Congress stuff the DACA records in the National Archives to be released to the public only after a delay…so as not to set a precedent for cynical sting operations.

              1. On, exactly, what grounds?

                There isn’t an argument for national security.

                1. Like I said, the temptation to set up a sting operation and undermine public confidence in the law is simply too great.

                  1. Like I said, the temptation to set up a sting operation and undermine public confidence in the law is simply too great.

                    A potential bad thing is not reason enough to lock up public documents. Using this logic, secrecy in the “War on Terror” was a good and decent thing.

                    1. Delayed release…so historians will be able to explore the story of Obama’s lawlessness.

                    2. Likewise, for different reasons, certain war-related documents should be released only after a delay…

            3. Reminds me of NYC’s new “municipal ID card” (here’s a puff-piece on it), which is basically becoming a handy list of illegals. I can’t imagine being stupid enough to sign up for that.

              1. “”Reminds me of NYC’s new “municipal ID card”””

                When I first heard about it, I was thinking, don’t fall for it!

        2. “”””this is really a shit move””””

          Obama was horrible, promising people what he did not have the power to give.nor could he get Congress to agree to it.

          Where is Obama now, the media should ask him about this.

          1. “Not my fault!” – B. Obama

          2. I don’t think we should penalize naive illegal immigrants for sharing the legal views of the Constitutional Law Professor In Chief – Obama and his enablers concocted all sorts of dumb legal justifications for the executive order, and they’re facing no consequences – I say deport them if caught, but don’t use their naivete against them, luring them in with a fake legalization policy.

            1. I don’t think we should penalize naive illegal immigrants for sharing the legal views of the Constitutional Law Professor In Chief – Obama and his enablers concocted all sorts of dumb legal justifications for the executive order, and they’re facing no consequences – I say deport them if caught, but don’t use their naivete against them, luring them in with a fake legalization policy.

              So, because one politician did something illegal, we should just keep it going indefinitely?

              1. No, like I said, deport them if caught, but don’t use their constitutional naivete against them, there should be enough other evidence.

                1. “Surely, this criminal isn’t so stupid as to confess to a crime. We must use OTHER evidence!!!”

        3. the people who signed up for the Dream Act – some of whom did not know their immigration status until they applied for student loans, etc – will have the fact that they signed up for the Act, an admission of their guilt – used against them

          Claiming that they never knew of their immigration status until they applied for college is a stretch. These are people who were brought to the US as kids, likely lived in homes where the primary language was Spanish, and they never knew they were illegals until they started applying for college? So not only are these “hard-working” Hispanic parents apparently incapable of feeding their kids three meals a day, they also didn’t prepare them for certain realities of the US immigration system. What swell people, definitely the kind we need more of in this country!

          DACA’s been in place since 2012 and the DREAM Act was first proposed in 2001. Sounds like the biggest mistake these supposedly high-functioning Hispanic DACA participants made was assuming that things were going to work out in their favor because they believed the “arc of the universe bends towards justice” or whatever stupid fluff they were fed by their teachers and relatives, instead of having a plan in case things changed.

          1. What swell people, definitely the kind we need more of in this country!

            We need more people like you, Red.

            1. I provide my kids three meals a day, so you’re right about that.

          2. So, having bad parents or being a bit naive means you deserve to have your life ruined?

            1. If you weren’t smart enough to get legally born in ‘Merica, you deserve every rotten thing that comes your way.

            2. So, having bad parents or being a bit naive means you deserve to have your life ruined?

              Plenty of people in jail for murder have kids. When the murderer is in jail, the kid’s life is fucked eight ways from Sunday.

              What crimes done by the parents should be ignored “for the children”?

              1. I think there is a reasonable distinction to be drawn between a serious crime like murder and a civil immigration violation. My point here is that the law is bad and should be changed. I don’t think you can make the same case about murder laws.
                Also, most of the people affected are adults who have pretty much spent their lives in the US. Putting aside my views about what broader immigration policy ought to be, I don’t have the same objection to younger immigrant children being deported with their parents if their parents are deportable.

            3. Are libertarians no longer about personal responsibility? If they weren’t prepared for the possibility of DACA being revoked once it became clear that Trump was becoming President, that’s on them.

        4. Everything I’ve read is not that they’ll be deported. They will serve out the remainder of their DACA thing. It just will not be renewed.

          1. I think it is impossible to predict what will happen, but using their admission of guilt against them after they signed up thinking they could potentially achieve permanent residency is shit.

            1. I think it is impossible to predict what will happen, but using their admission of guilt against them after they signed up thinking they could potentially achieve permanent residency is shit.

              Given that, literally, not one word in DACA involved them becoming citizens, there is no shit here. Saying “We’ll ignore your criminal status for now” is not a statement that it will be ignored in perpetuity.

            2. They signed up thinking they would at least be allowed to HAVE JOBS.

              1. The phrase “tough shit” comes to mind.

                If advocates, such as Reason, lied to these poor morons, then it’s hardly the President’s fault. Trump didn’t promise them anything.

              2. I just wanted to go fishing with my uncle one last time.

                Made the mistake of admitting to a DUI 10 yrs earlier.

                http://www.ezbordercrossing.co…..ith-a-dui/

                I told my uncle to go on, and walked 7 miles to the nearest bus station to get home…

          2. And then men with guns with forcibly prevent them from exchanging money for labor. So then what?

            1. Go home and make a life there?

              1. It’s not their “home” if they grew up in America.

      2. No mention of the fact that laws are expected to go through Congress.

        As Tony admitted a few days ago, Hispanics are the Democrats’ most important constituency now–and that means they’ve adopted the tacit assumptions of governance that are SOP in majority-Hispanic countries, which is that legislators are mere window-dressing to a strongman who rules in a manner they support.

        Now that there are enough Hispanics in the country to leverage their influence politically, liberals are dropping the pretense that they give a damn about Constitutional principle in order to pander to La Raza.

        1. Rights are only for people who reliably vote Republican. We get it.

          1. Can you cite the “right” being infringed upon by ending DACA?

            The right to not be penalized for criminal status is not a right that exists.

            1. The human right to engage in voluntary exchange of money for labor, and to not be imprisoned without committing a crime, or kidnapped and forcibly taken from your family, your home, and your life, simply because you were born in the wrong place and didn’t obtain the right pieces of paper. Which are impossible for you to obtain anyway.

              1. The human right to engage in voluntary exchange of money for labor, and to not be imprisoned without committing a crime, or kidnapped and forcibly taken from your family, your home, and your life, simply because you were born in the wrong place and didn’t obtain the right pieces of paper.

                Hazel has to ensure that low-wage peasant labor remains in place so the GDP goes up another half percent.

                1. Shorter Red Rocks:
                  Mexicans have no human rights.

                  1. Shorter Hazel:
                    I’m fine with low-wage peasant labor as long as they’re not living in my neighborhood.

                    1. Deporting them is actually for their own good, Hazel.

                  2. Define “human rights”. A lot of people think food and shelter are human rights.

                    1. How about “voluntarily exchanging money for goods and services”?
                      Cause that’s pretty much all these people are interested in doing.

                2. Huh, that is some communist gobbledigook right there.

              2. The human right to engage in voluntary exchange of money for labor, and to not be imprisoned without committing a crime, or kidnapped and forcibly taken from your family, your home, and your life, simply because you were born in the wrong place and didn’t obtain the right pieces of paper. Which are impossible for you to obtain anyway.

                Seems to be an awful lot of words to simply say “No rights are being infringed”.

                Being here illegally is committing a crime, just to let you know. No other country would actually argue otherwise.

                1. What rights are being infringed by their being here?

                  I thought that was supposed to be the basis of laws, and it’s up to the government to prove its case, not the other way around.

          2. Rights are only for people who reliably vote Republican. We get it.

            Keep waiting for those “natural conservatives” to start acting like it.

      3. Yes, congress should change the law. That would be the right way to do things. But deporting someone who was brought here as a child and really doesn’t know any other home is just shitty. I hope congress can get it together soon enough that we don’t see a lot of that.

        1. “””””a child and really doesn’t know any other home is just shitty”””

          So are you also against immigration into the US by children since they don’t know the US?

          1. If they are being forcefully deported to the US without their parents, or as adults after living most of their lives in another country, then yes.

            You do realize there is a difference between forced deportation and a child moving to a new place with parents?

            1. “”””a child moving to a new place with parents?””‘

              So they are being forced by their parents and you don’t care!!!!!!

              1. So punish the parents, not the child.

                1. You cannot punish the parents without effecting the child, and the punishment is pretty much limited to deportation.

                  1. But if the child is an adult with a life and connections in the US and not their country of birth, the parents can be deported without taking that life from their children. I’m not saying that no children should be deported ever (that’s a separate argument), but that people who have essentially lived their whole lives as Americans shouldn’t be deported to countries they have little or no connection to.

                2. So punish the parents, not the child.

                  You’re right, we should deport the parents as well so their familia remains intact and they can support each other.

        2. Sometimes the law is shitty, Zeb, and libertarians should honor and defend the shitty laws just as much as the good ones, for so long as they remain on the books.

          1. No, thanks. This is where the anarchist in me comes out. Enforcing bad laws is immoral. Acting according to the law doesn’t make “just doing my job” a more valid excuse for doing bad things to people.

            1. So you hate the rule of law, which makes you a leftist. Real liberty lovers defend the exercise of power, so long as procedures were followed.

              1. There is no such thing as the rule of law. It’s just an imaginary thing people pretend to believe in when they want to advocate doing something but don’t want to have to justify why they want to do it.

                1. Hey, Stormy, guy? Don’t be throwing Hasnas the Anarchist at me.

                  Not at ME.

          2. Which is why I would never smoke pot and never drank under age and will continue to defend drug enforcement.

          3. No one is saying to defend shitty laws. Some of us just don’t believe it’s right to enforce laws inconsistently just because you care more about one group than another. I don’t know how anyone can call that “moral”.

            1. I want the laws unenforced consistently.

            2. Enforcing laws when basic human rights are being violated is immoral.

              We’re not talking about equitable enforcement of traffic citations here. We’re talking about ruining people’s lives – literally dragging them from their homes at the point of a gun and shipping them to country they have never known.

              1. Their parents gambled, and lost. Blame them.

        3. But deporting someone who was brought here as a child and really doesn’t know any other home is just shitty.

          I don’t get this. We should only deport people who aren’t sympathetic in some way?

          1. Maybe we shouldn’t arrest any parents for crimes of any kind. It would just be shitty to the kids.

          2. I’m for equal enforcement of internment laws. ALL Japanese people should have been interned during WWII. No exceptions!

            1. “Now make me my burrito so I can take back to eat in my suburban whiteopia!”

              1. “Burritos should be made by white people because only white people should have rights in America”

                1. Well, we have the recipes now, so you could always try making your own burrito.

          3. I just don’t see any practical difference between someone who was born here and someone who was brought here as a young child and has essentially lived their whole life as an American. Such people never made a choice to violate immigration law and I find such enforcement to be arbitrary and cruel.

        4. But the shittyness is on the parents who put their child in that position. How long does the kid have to be here before tghey become undeportable under your view of what the rules should be? Or is it just that no one should be deportable for any reason?

          1. It has more to do with how old they were when they arrived. This isn’t about young children who are still with their parents. It’s about people who have made a life here and never had one in their birth countries.

            1. We get it. You’re deeply sympathetic to their plight.

  2. Hurricane Irma is headed for the U.S. and may hit southern Florida this weekend.

    Finally, the hurricane season that vindicates the Church of AGW.

    1. Don’t be crazy. No evidence or vindication is needed for religion.

      1. Evidence is discouraged because its more virtuous to just go on faith.

    2. Right, Florida’s never been hit by a hurricane before.

    3. Lowe’s was already very busy this morning (Fort Myers). I was there for 10 minutes and they went through three big pallets of bottled water. Plywood is already in short supply.

  3. Vladimir Putin on Donald Trump: “He’s not my bride.”

    In Russia, bride grab your p*ssy.

    1. Go on…

  4. U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley on North Korea: “The time has come for us to exhaust all of our diplomatic means before it’s too late.”

    AKA food aid.

  5. …North Korea had been observed moving a rocket that appeared to be an intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) towards its west coast.

    Biting the hand that keeps everyone else of its back?

  6. Tronc Inc., which publishes the Los Angeles Times and the Chicago Tribune, has acquired the New York Daily News.

    Greetings, programs!

  7. Tronc Inc., which publishes the Los Angeles Times and the Chicago Tribune, has acquired the New York Daily News.

    “Tronc” is the sound my dog makes when he pukes.

    1. This item manages to cram in four names of things I couldn’t care less about.

      1. You know who else managed to cram four things into some guy?

        1. Tony’s high school track coach?

    2. I got so troncked this weekend, bro.

    3. You have a dog as well? I am gonna guess it is a St. Bernard or something comparably huge, otherwise I feel sorry for the poor doggo, living with five cats.

      1. He is definitely at the bottom of the pecking order, but he gets by.

  8. Vladimir Putin on Donald Trump: “He’s not my bride.”

    Finally! Hard evidence that will shut up the main stream media with their stupid hysteria. I’m glad that’s over.

    1. Putin is more of a love ’em and leave ’em.type.

  9. I wonder how NK has changed regarding their reasons and demands since the last couple crises under Clinton in 1994 and Bush in the early 2000s with their HEU program. Back then, there was coordination with Japan, Russia and China.

    What’s different today?

    1. It seemed to me that when Dennis Rodman went over there to shoot some hoops, none of this nuclear shit was going on.

      1. He should have let Kim Jong Un dunk on him a few more times.

        1. Reminds me of a 30 Rock episode…

        2. Thanks. Now I have an image of Kim dribbling a basketball back and forth skillfully between his legs, and the basketball is made from the skin of dead political prisoners.

      2. It seemed to me that when Dennis Rodman went over there to shoot some hoops, none of this nuclear shit was going on.

        I thought Carter put an end to all this shit and we gave him a peace prize for it?

  10. Lena Dunham Shares Her Nude Beach Photo Diary?And How She Discovered Her Inner Prude

    LD: I don’t know what I expected?a dappling of nude bathers? A mixed bag? But when we finally got to the beach, everyone was truly, truly nude. Young, old, gay, straight, model-fit, and beer- and BBQ-loving dad bods. It was both a gorgeous world of universal acceptance, nonsexual and implicitly loving, and a Hieronymus Bosch painting. I was immediately struck by just how many conversations were happening with a man’s penis at his seated companion’s eye level, and every squeamish childlike instinct in my body rose up, releasing itself as a sound that can only be spelled “yrrrgghhhoooggghhh.”

    1. Like she has any latitude to be grossed out by other peoples’ bodies.

      1. Oh, she does. Longitude as well.

    2. If only she’d discovered her inner prude a bit earlier…

    3. Good lord Crusty, what are you trying to do to us.

    4. Uh, guys? I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I think Google is broken. I searched “exhibitionist lena dunham” and only got 271,000 hits. Did I misspell her name or something?

    5. Why do we pander to her fetishes?

    6. It’s like I have been holding my breath for several weeks.

  11. Taylor Swift is planning to trademark key phrases from her new album

    Taylor Swift is reportedly planning to trademark key phrases and titles from her new album so they can be used in extensive merchandise collections.

    According to TMZ, song title ‘Look What You Made Me Do’ and lyric ‘The old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now’ are among the phrases that she is seeking to control in order to use them on a wide range of merchandise that includes everything from guitar picks to t-shirts.

    1. Damn. I’ve been saying “the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now” for YEARS.

      1. “Dave’s not here, man.”

      2. It’s about time you set that poor old guy free and start buying mass produced underwear like the rest of us.

    2. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Intellectual Property is a bad idea.

  12. Laura Ingraham on Fox & Friends: “Let the Dreamers eat Brioche!”

  13. The Trad in Washington

    One of the interesting things about Mueller is that he has a distinct uniform ? always a dark suit, always a white shirt, and always a red or blue foulard tie. In his 2008 Washingtonian profile on Mueller, Graff noted this preference extended to his subordinates, who’d get a sharp word from the imposing director if they wore something too flamboyant. There are famous stories of FBI agents, who had to brief Mueller in the morning, scurrying out the night before to get the right clothes:

    And black shoes – always black shoes. It’s nice to know that someone still has some class.

    1. He lets his freak flag fly when it comes to the belt, though.

      1. Payne Stewart’s socks.

    2. It’s nice to know that someone still has some class.

      Not so fast, look at the pictures where you can see the watch. He’s one of those people who have their watch turned around so the face is on the palm side of their wrist, instead of on the back of the wrist like a normal person.

      1. Guess which low-class dirtbag didn’t read the article*:

        he’s almost never pictured without a chunky Casio watch on his left wrist (always with the watch facing in). It looks to be some variation of the DW-290, a classic pre-G Shock model, which Tom Cruise wore in 1996 action spy film Mission Impossible.

        Greg from No Man Walks Alone, who used to work on Wall Street, tells me he used to see watches like this all the time when he was in finance. They’re a way for certain people to downplay their wealth and power, a deliberate style choice that first became popular in 2008. “When people blamed the economic crisis on the financial services sector, people on Wall Street swapped out their Pateks and Rolexes for Casios,” says Greg. “It’s also a lifestyle thing. Powerful men at that age create status around athletic achievements. I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve heard between senior bankers about the new road bike they bought or how many miles they ran that morning.”

        *the answer is Stormy.

        1. Fact: This trend started before 2008, although after the banking crisis it became more prominent – you know, like one of the real people.

        2. I did read the article. If you read my comment, my issue is not the kind of watch he wears, but how he wears it.

        3. Me. Good thing too because it saves me from putting my head in the oven and turning the gas on.

          1. It’s like school on Sunday up in this piece!

      2. I’ve always worn my watch that way. It’s just better.

        1. Hhiippsstteerr…

          1. As far as I am concerned only hipsters wear a watch any more, period. I don’t miss them one bit.

            1. I actually haven’t worn a watch for several years. But if I did, the face would be on the inside.

              1. You’ve been watching Pulp Fiction, haven’t you.

              2. I tried it back in the day; I felt ridiculous.

                1. Lol. How long did you leave it in?

              3. I actually haven’t worn a watch for several years. But if I did, the face would be on the inside.

                When I put my phone in my pocket, the face is always against my thigh.

    3. One of the interesting things about Mueller is that he has a distinct uniform

      Wowwwwww, a uniform. How interesting.

      1. It’s interesting by the fact of how interesting it isn’t!

        1. A dark suit with a white shirt? Dude’s lovably retro!

          1. It’s like being surrounded by Men’s Warehouse employees up in this piece.

  14. Everything you need to know about Sen. Menendez’s bribery trial

    Democratic Sen. Bob Menendez’s public corruption trial is set to kick off Wednesday with opening statements in federal court in Newark, New Jersey. The trial comes more than two years after charges were initially filed against Menendez and his alleged co-conspirator, Dr. Salomon Melgen.
    Prosecutors insist that the men’s relationship was a “corrupt pact” in which Melgen showered Menendez with expensive vacations and campaign donations in exchange for the senator interceding on Melgen’s behalf in several different disputes with government officials — allegations the two vigorously deny.
    The case also puts the Justice Department’s Public Integrity section back in the spotlight, as Menendez is the first major bribery trial against a sitting US senator in nine years.

    Nine years? I assume they haven’t been looking.

    1. Preet’s corruption cases against several corrupt NY pols are falling apart. I hope NJ does better.

      1. In all fairness, there are only so many hours in the day, and woodchippers take priority.

    2. 9 years is just from when … hmmm .. what has been happening for the last 9 years, who was running that DoJ unit, what kind of slackers weren’t looking for bribees?

  15. Finally, there’s a website just for people who think Clinton should have won

    A new website called Verrit is that nightmare coming full circle. While it may not have outlandish conspiracy theories or careless whoppers (though there’s certainly plenty of that on the left, too), Verrit is counter-counter programming to the pro-Trump media: an enclave for liberal thoughts that is proudly and explicitly for “the 65.8 million” people who voted for Hillary Clinton in 2016. It’s the blue MAGA hat of websites.

    Verrit, created by Clinton stan Peter Daou, who coined the hashtag and website #HillaryMen, and took credit for creating The Huffington Post, promises “an unwavering commitment to truth and facts.” Many of those facts are just image macros with quotes from Hillary Clinton, who asked people to sign up for the website in a tweet on Sunday.

    Ewwwwwwwwwwww.

    1. Looks like a good site to bookmark for the occasional uncomfortable chuckle.

      1. It will unknowingly become a spoof of itself.

        1. WILL become?

    2. “Verrit is counter-counter programming to the pro-Trump media”

      Doing the work MSNBC refuses to do.

    3. Daou is something else–a human Squealer with less testosterone than 15-year-old girl. That someone could be so devoted to a coat-tail-riding mediocrity like Hillary speaks to the depth of his mental illness.

      The Verrit site is a fascinating window into modern culture–three generations of increasingly infantilized Americans who need to keep a separate tab open to be spoon-fed talking points because they don’t actually know anything and have no principles whatsoever.

      1. It takes a special person to be a bit creepier in his Clinton devotion that Sidney Blumenthal.

        Remember, if Hillary won, people like this would have some semblance of power over your lives.

    4. Finally, an outlet to speak up for the Democrats in America.

    5. Should not creating the Huffington Post be something to take blame rather than credit for?

  16. Tronc Inc., the publisher of the Los Angeles Times and Chicago Tribune, has purchased the New York Daily News for $1

    Still too much.

  17. I don’t usually applaud death, but: Man crushed to death after trying to take selfie with elephant in India

    “He was also trying to take a selfie with the elephant when it turned on him,” the official told the India Times.

    I saw a couple almost fall off a cliff while trying to take a selfie, and if they had fallen my first instinct would have been to stifle a laugh. Then, of course, I would have rigged some sort of Stallone in Cliffhanger sort of apparatus to save them.*

    *This is not true.

    1. Save them? Or just get down there to take a pic with them?

    2. Then, of course, I would have rigged some sort of Stallone in Cliffhanger sort of apparatus to save them.*

      *This is not true.

      Spoiler alert, the rig saves no one.

  18. I sense a business opportunity or a new mega church:

    Former stripper becomes a ‘sex witch’ to help counsel couples – and even boosts their orgasms with spells

    A former stripper turned professional ‘sex witch’ now makes a living teaching people about pagan eroticism – including how spells can boost orgasms.

    Shaney Marie, 31, became interested in witchcraft after working as an exotic dancer and deciding her male clients needed deeper sexual connections.

    The self-proclaimed ‘priestess’ now teaches magic sexuality to couples and singletons across Australia and plans to take her booming business to Europe.

    The New Zealand-born ‘witch’ identifies as pansexual , which means not being limited by gender, and eco-sexual, which means finding nature and the earth sexually stimulating.

    1. OK, then.

      I know that the modern pagan movement is allegedly about communion with nature and all that, but I thought even tree-huggers had boundaries.

    2. Orgasm Boost was my nickname in college.

      1. “Self-Proclaimed ‘Priestess'” was mine.

    3. “The self-proclaimed ‘priestess’ now teaches magic sexuality to couples and singletons across Australia . . .”

      Ha. The writer misspelled “simpleton.”

    4. She is a dirty woman, then?

  19. Very sad there is no mention of Walter Becker’s passing

    1. Yes, I’d rather something about him than Lou Reed or Bob Dylan.

  20. U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley on North Korea: “The time has come for us to exhaust all of our diplomatic means before it’s too late.”

    Firstly, wood. Secondly, I do hope lil kim-jong understands that North Korea cannot survive a war with the US, let alone other countries that would be involved in a coalition against him.

    1. Maybe he wants to go out in a blaze of glory? Beats waiting for his own people to overthrow him and do who-knows-what to him, right?

      PS – Let’s hope I’m full of shit on this.

  21. Who could have guessed that the Daily News’s lurch into a parody of far-left hysterics would not turn out to be the business plan they were looking for.

    1. So backwards what about these for King Arthur!!!!

      Agender
      Androgyne
      Androgynous
      Bigender
      Cis
      Cisgender
      Cis Female
      Cis Male
      Cis Man
      Cis Woman
      Cisgender Female
      Cisgender Male
      Cisgender Man
      Cisgender Woman
      Female to Male
      FTM
      Gender Fluid
      Gender Nonconforming
      Gender Questioning
      Gender Variant
      Genderqueer
      Intersex
      Male to Female
      MTF
      Neither
      Neutrois
      Non-binary
      Other
      Pangender
      Trans
      Trans*
      Trans Female
      Trans* Female
      Trans Male
      Trans* Male
      Trans Man
      Trans* Man
      Trans Person
      Trans* Person
      Trans Woman
      Trans* Woman
      Transfeminine
      Transgender
      Transgender Female
      Transgender Male
      Transgender Man
      Transgender Person
      Transgender Woman
      Transmasculine
      Transsexual
      Transsexual Female
      Transsexual Male
      Transsexual Man
      Transsexual Person
      Transsexual Woman
      Two-Spirit

      1. Obviously it’s best if we restrict people’s freedom of self-identification so that you don’t feel confused.

        1. Yeah! Because libertarians are all about restricting freedom! You got us!

    2. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.

      1. Technically, the woman in the pond was simply furnishing *evidence* that Arthur was the rightful king.

    3. Matilda should be concerned wth what William the Bastard’s heirs have historically done with Pretender’s to their throne.

  22. Way I see it, 35 mm is more dangerous than a 9mm any day of the week.

    http://www.nydailynews.com/new…..-1.3469666

    1. From the hospital, Grimm retraced his steps leading up to the shooting, wondering what caused the deputy to reach for his gun.

      “Until I hear his side, I guess I won’t know what I did wrong,” Grimm said.

      The state’s Bureau of Criminal Investigation is probing the incident, but Grimm’s father said his son isn’t looking for swift punishment.

      “Andy does not want him to get fired,” Grimm said, calling the shooting a misunderstanding.

      Get shot by a cop for no reason, assume it’s your fault, hope the cop doesn’t get into trouble because there’s no reason why cops who shoot people for no reason shouldn’t be cops. Is this guy a friend of Dunphy’s?

  23. Trump to End DACA

    And any good will still left.

    Putin Says Trump Is ‘Not My Bride’

    “What’s the safe word, Donald?”
    “Cinammon”

  24. Europe split apart TrumPutin when they realized the nuclear threat that it posed.

    Similarly the world recognizes the threat of NK’s H-bomb and will figure out a creative way to neutralize it, despite Trump’s desire to blow everything up so that there’s no trace left of the “Jewish science” that created his dilemma in the first place.

    1. (a) Everything is Trump’s fault, including North Korea

      (b) Trump is a Nazi.

      I guess that about covers it.

  25. HOT TAKE: Every* complaint about the removal of Confederate statues is embarrassing and stupid. smh all over this mother

    *exception allowed for aesthetic complaints, though I’ve yet to encounter one

  26. President Donald Trump’s decision to end Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals, also known as DACA, the Obama executive action offering certain protections for undocumented immigrants that arrived in the U.S. as children.

    Literal men with literal guns coming to literally drag people from their homes.
    And some people think the comparisons to facism are overwrought.

    1. Yeah. Especially considering the fact that these people will be put onto trains and then sent to death camps. Totally the same. Like, you know, and stuff.

      1. You’re right. They won’t be put to death. So it’s totally not like facism at all.

        1. Like totally. I mean, that government goons will be going door to door demanding papers makes it totally like fascism. I mean, they’ll like be demanding papers in like German and stuff “Zeigen Sie mir Ihre Papiere!” It’s like totally the same thing. Mexicans will be forced to sew a bean onto their clothes to identify themselves and stuff!

          1. I should add that it’s not REALLY facism unless they are using Cyanide gas and ovens. If procedures are followed and they are humanely killed with lethal injection – not facism!.
            The speaking in German thing should also go without saying.
            If they aren’t speaking German, it’s not facism.

            1. Seriously though, there will be no roundup. No one is going door to door. Cops are fucking lazy. There will be no proactive enforcement. To get deported someone will have to get the attention of the police the old fashioned way, and then the cops will need to communicate with the feds. It’s not going to happen. Comparing the enforcement if immigration law with the extermination of a race is, well, dumb.

              1. Yeah, it’s totally IMPOSSIBLE that we could have ICE agents going door to door to round up illegal aliens. Despite the fact that Trump promised exactly that during the election campaign. Just another one of those crazy things that Trump wasn’t serious about so we shouldn’t bother worrying about.
                Anyone who thinks it could happen is just crazy. Nothing to see here, move along.

              2. Elian Gonzalez disagrees.

            2. I refuse to believe that there’s no ’11’ on the hyperbole meter. Just set up a few pits of molten sulfur at Gitmo and drop the immigrants in so we can televise the whole affair. That’ll make the people who didn’t care before, care now right? Then, compel viewing and round up wrong-thinkers. We’ll get to ideological purity through obnoxious hyperbole this time, I know it!

              The Republic is rotten, and sucks, but if we make it look bad enough a better (looking) option is bound to show up!

      2. Yeah. Especially considering the fact that these people will be put onto trains and then sent to death camps. Totally the same. Like, you know, and stuff.

        230+ yrs. of the Weimar (nevermind the actual Jim Crow, slavery, previous internments, suspensions of habeas corpus, and consistent stream of deportations) now that Obama has left, there can be only Nazi Germany.

        Chocolate Jesus has come and gone and we are all left behind.

  27. undocumented immigrants

    Is there any truth to the rumor that burglars will henceforth be referred to as “undocumented houseguests”?

    1. Since house guests are generally undocumented, probably not since it would be a useless distinction.

      I don’t think “undocumented” is a great term either, but mostly because it’s not always accurate when applied to people who are in the country but have no current authorization to be.

      1. Also, aside from scale, there is absolutely no difference between a piece of privately-owned real estate and a continent-spanning geopolitical entity.

        1. Have to call bullshit on that.

        2. Yeah, I also hate that analogies aren’t totally accurate comparisons, and constantly bitch about it because I think it’s a take worth hearing.

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