Trump Confident About Israel-Palestine Peace Deal, Comey 'Mildly Nauseous' About Prospect of Impacting Election, Cassini Spacecraft Flies Through 'Big Empty': P.M. Links

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  • NASA

    President Trump said he was confident of being able to help negotiate a peace deal between Israel and Palestine.

  • At a Senate hearing, FBI Director James Comey tried to define journalism and explain why it shouldn't apply to Wikileaks. He also said it made him "mildly nauseous" to think that his decision to re-open the probe into Hillary Clinton could've influenced voters, but said he'd do it again.
  • United Kingom Prime Minister Theresa May accused the European Union of using Brexit negotiations to try to influence British elections in June.
  • Turkey and Russia say they would both support the creation of "safe zones" in Syria.
  • Barack Obama unveils the design for his planned presidential library in Chicago.
  • The Cassini spacecraft flew through the region between Saturn and its rings, described as "the big empty."

NEXT: Blasphemy allegations in Pakistan and Bangladesh

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  1. At a Senate hearing, FBI Director James Comey tried to define journalism and explain why it shouldn’t apply to Wikileaks.

    Eat shit, Comey.

    1. Autophagy.

    2. Hello.

      “Barack Obama unveils the design for his planned presidential library in Chicago.”

      Him in a cape in a Super-Man pose?

      1. What is this? A library for ANTS?!?

    3. Coprophage and thanatose.

    4. “At a Senate hearing, FBI Director James Comey tried to define journalism and explain why it shouldn’t apply to Wikileaks.”

      Did he also try to explain why he has jurisdiction over a foreigner who publishes information sent to him?

  2. President Trump said he was confident of being able to help negotiate a peace deal between Israel and Palestine.

    Frequently wrong, never in doubt.

    1. Never mind that they’ve been fighting in the Middle East for 6 millennia and God Himself got so sick of dealing with this shit He sent a flood to wipe out almost the whole damned human race rather than put up with it any more – Trump’s confident his deal-making skills can fix anything. No, shithead, some things you can’t negotiate and some people don’t want to negotiate even if you do think their house is a heap and would look great as a limousine parking lot.

      1. To be fair, he’s not the first President who thought they could fix the Israel/Palestine conflict through negotiation. Hell, Clinton banked a good chunk of his legacy on the idea that he could do so, and utterly flopped.

        1. They all think they’re Carter when it comes to the middle east, neglecting the fact that he had 2 (relatively willing) parties to work with.

          1. That and Egypt has no skin in the game, having reclaimed the Sinai.

      2. What part of the Old Testament makes you think God disapproves of war?

        1. How else would you explain Hillary’s defeat?

          1. God hates wymon. When the Old Testament didn’t make that clear enough, He wrote the New Testament. When even that wasn’t clear enough, He wrote the Koran. Apparently that wasn’t clear enough either, so he rejected Hillary.

            God Hates Wimmenz!

  3. Obama’s sex secrets laid bare: How he considered a gay fling, had passionate sex and COCAINE with one white girl, proposed twice to another – and CHEATED on Michelle before they married

    Garrow reveals that she said: ‘Sexually he really wasn’t very imaginative but he was comfortable. He was no kind of shrinking “can’t handle it. This is invasive” or “I’m timid” in any way; he was quite earthy.’

    1. She spent the night again with him a few days later and rated him highly in bed ? even writing a poem to him saying: ‘B. That’s for you. F’s for all the f***ing that we do.’

    2. I could have done without the description of the scent of Obama’s phallus. But ok, thanks, now we know it is quite earthy.

      1. I thought earthy was describing his style, his moves, and not his musk. I think we should dive deeper into this.

  4. Barack Obama unveils the design for his planned presidential library in Chicago.

    “You start off in the Frank Marshall Davis honorary foyer, then take a left into the Saul Alinsky wing, then another left into the Bill Ayers wing, and finally one last left into the library mosque”.

    1. Okay.

      lol.

    2. Yokel Ono’s last words on his death bed are gonna be “Insane Block Yomamma was a Muslim
      Good bye, cuckaschmucks.” Beeeeeeeeeeep.

    3. A grand tribute to socialism, until you get to the gift shop.

    4. Don’t forget the memorial to the 911 hijackers and the framed real, Kenyan birth certificate.

      1. And I’m guessing the whole thing is being paid for by George Soros and Prince Alaweed, or whatever his motherfucking name is.

        1. We wish. It’s coming out of our pockets, one way or another.

    5. I can see it now, gorgeous classical monumental architecture, made out of fiberglass, enclosing an enormous empty space.

  5. Email: Trump “directly involved” in post-inauguration hunt for rogue tweeter

    But emails released by the National Park Service in response to a Freedom of Information Act request reveal that the new president was “concerned” about the retweet.

    “Obviously, this has become a very sensitive issue, especially since the President has gotten directly involved and contacted Acting Director Mike Reynolds concerned about one of the images that was retweeted,” wrote Tim Cash, Chief of Digital Strategy at the National Park Service in a Jan. 21 email to Shaun Cavanaugh, the agency’s Chief Information Security Officer.

    Bigger news: It only took few months for the FOIA request.

  6. Lena Dunham Went To The Met Gala And Ended Up In The Emergency Room

    “She’s at home resting and doing well,” a source told HuffPost.

    Thank goodness.

    1. Did she get struck by a boat propeller?

      1. Man, a Tee-rrific comment.

    2. Did she sexually assault another black guy and get slapped out?

    3. Did she need to get that stuck coke bottle out?

    1. Who knew that there were racist assholes among Red Sox fans? Inconceivable.

      I guess it’s nice that other people want to show how not-racist they are by cheering really loud. But I don’t really get why this is a big thing.

  7. The 5 Weirdest Things On Gwyneth Paltrow’s Lifestyle Website

    Recipe for Spirit Truffles

    This little truffles are made with moon pantry spirit dust, which ? drumroll? “feeds harmony and extrasensory perception through pineal gland de-calcification and activation.”

    1. Do we have any updates on whether the jade eggs can cure incontinence from bong hit coughing fits?

      1. I do know that after I inserted a jade egg I haven’t had one single bowel movement.

        1. You are supposed to take it out after you are done exercising your clenching muscles.

    2. Pineal gland? I’m pretty sure even Descartes knew that shit made no sense.

  8. Aung San Suu Kyi rejects UN inquiry into crimes against Rohingya:

    Myanmar leader says resolution for the investigation is ‘not in keeping with what is happening on the ground’.

    Aung San Suu Kyi has rejected a decision by the UN’s rights council to investigate allegations of crimes by Myanmar’s security forces against minority Rohingya Muslims.

    The UN body agreed in March to dispatch a fact-finding mission to the south Asian Asian country over claims of murder, rape and torture in Rakhine state.

    “We do not agree with it,” Aung San Suu Kyi, Myanmar’s de facto leader, told a press conference on Tuesday with EU diplomatic chief Federica Mogherini during a visit to Brussels, when asked about the probe.

    “We have disassociated ourselves from the resolution because we do not think that the resolution is in keeping with what is actually happening on the ground.”

    The Nobel laureate said that the country would be “happy to accept” recommendations that were “in keeping with the real needs of the region … But those recommendations which will divide further the two communities in Rakhine we will not accept, because it will not help to resolve the problems that are arising all the time”.

    Fake Peace Prize.

    1. Power corrupts all.

    2. It’s a tradition now.

  9. The Cassini spacecraft flew through the region between Saturn and its rings, described as “the big empty.”

    “The Big Empty” is Mike M.’s nickname.

    1. I thought it was the Obama Presidential Library.

  10. ‘Dear White People’ Doesn’t Know How to Reckon With 2017

    “Look, bro, just because you got a black chick on your arm doesn’t mean you get to Miley Cyrus our pain” isn’t something I expected to hear in 2017.

    The line, said by one of the main characters in the first episode of Justin Simien’s new Netflix series, Dear White People, is meant to serve as a mic drop. It’s Reggie’s (Marque Richardson) first triumph over the nebulous serieswide antagonist that is white liberal racism, a line meant to elicit slam-poetry snaps heard round the world. In this case the mild-to-moderately-racist vessel is Gabe (John Patrick Amedori), the #WokeBae of outspoken “Tracee Ellis Ross biracial” protagonist Sam (Logan Browning).

    How incredibly boring.

    1. The first commenter on that article agrees with you. Their gripe is that the show is “too cisnormative”.

      1. My kindred spirit comments at Medium.

  11. Charles Barkley If I Saw Racist Fan … ‘I Would Put an End to That Sh*t’

    Barkley was out in NYC when we asked about the situation in Boston — where a fan at Fenway Park hurled racial taunts at the Baltimore Orioles star.

    “It should never happen,” Barkley says … “but I’m disappointed in the fans who were around those people saying those things.”

    Barkley essentially says it’s up to others to stand up for what’s right — and that’s what he would do.

    By the way, this is just the beginning of Barkley’s foray into racial issues — he’s launching a new show on TNT called “American Race” later this month … and he’s not holding back.

    Let’s discuss race more, said…apparently a lot of people?

    1. I have news. There is no way that a modern sports fan is “racist” in any meaningful way. They do not want their teams purged of black people.

      Far more likely is that they don’t like this particular athlete and they chose taunts that were meant to be hurtful. It seems they succeeded.

      1. That’s a good point. Using racial slurs doesn’t make someone racist. Often the intent is just to be an asshole, and racial slurs are a good way to get a rise out of people.

        Of course, they could also be actually racist in a way that doesn’t demand a white only baseball league. It is Boston, after all.

  12. SJW’s going after Colbert for his remarks about Trump being Putin’s Cock holster.

    Colbert has evidently really stepped up the lefty insanity lately, so its like he dug his own grave, picked out his own grave stone and climbed on in. Let the LGBT community throw the dirt on. Hilarious when they eat their own.

  13. Barack Obama unveils the design for his planned presidential library in Chicago.

    I’d rather watch Selena Meyer unveil hers.

  14. President Trump said he was confident of being able to help negotiate a peace deal between Israel and Palestine.

    I would say that Trump has as good a chance, if not better, than any previous president.

  15. “At a Senate hearing, FBI Director James Comey … said it made him “mildly nauseous” to think that his decision to re-open the probe into Hillary Clinton could’ve influenced voters…”

    James Comey is most certainly nauseous, and not mildly.

    1. Nauseous or nauseating?

      1. A thing is nauseous if it induces nausea in one. (eg., a nauseous smell when Crusty farts).
        A person is nauseated if they have feelings of nausea. (the need to vomit after inhaling Crusty’s fart).

        Modern dictionaries allow nauseous to be a synonym of nauseated, but they’re wrong.

        Regardless, Comey is still nauseous.

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