Libertarian Valentine's Day Cards
Free Minds. Free Markets. Free Love.
Happy Valentine's Day from Reason.
You are the key to my Locke
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You have the curves to supply demand.
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Some encounters are too good to be unconstitutional.
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You stole my little pink heart.
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Don't just send a card, send a Personal Statement.
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Let me show you my instruments of labor.
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Break the state, not my heart.
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No LGBTQWERTY love?
You saw that it's Austin and Meredith Bragg? Well, get this. Meredith is totally a dude.
NERD ALERT!
No, that would be a dvorak keyboard.
Please make one for these guys.
"Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows."
I liked the others. But the Milton Friedman one just seems a little creepy to me.
Seems like that one should have been about high speed rail.
Speaking of high speed rail. I just looked it up, new projection for Calif. high speed rail is about $100Billion (with a "B") growing every year.
Shame there's no money for dam(n) maintenance.
"High Speed Rail" was my nickname in college.
Interstate Boondoggle was mine.
Mine was Dam Maintenance.
Crumbling Infrastructure over here.
D-:
That's funny, mine was "Slow Train to Nowhere".
Great band name.
Valentine's is too authentic nowadays. Whatever happened to the completely commercialized holiday we all knew and paid out the ass for?
"You put a judicial hold on the executive order banning love from entering my heart."
Quit stalin' and be my Valentine!
Am I doing this right?
That's a good one
Me Mein
Be Mein
I have composed an open Valentine of Love Poem for My Dearest Trumpster the Dumpster:
Trumpty Dumpty, He's quite off-the-wall,
Trumpty Dumpty won't stay in His toilet stall
He just goes ahead and takes His shits,
Totally regardless of whereever He sits
Whenever He simply, no way, can sleep,
He Twits us His thoughts, they're all SOOO deep!
He simply must, He MUST, Twit us His bird,
No matter the words, however absurd!
He sits and snorts His coke with a spoon,
Then He brazenly shoots us His moon!
They say He'll be impeached by June,
Man, oh man, June cannot come too soon!
So He sits and jiggles His balls,
Then He Twitters upon the walls
"Some come here to sit and think,
Some come here to shit and stink
But I come here to scratch my balls,
And read the writings on the walls
Here I sit, My cheeks a-flexin'
Giving birth to another Texan!
He who writes these lines of wit,
Wraps His Trump in little balls,
He who reads these lines of wit,
Eats those loser's balls of shit!"
Aw I wuv u 2 🙂
Is this why there are no libertarian women?
There are no libertarian women because the natural inclination of female of the species is to be taken care of, and who better to do that than the state? Also, toss something in there about illogical minds and irrational inclinations.
Also, periods.
Can never be too careful of grizzlies.
Also, women be shoppin', amirite?
+ .77X as libertarian as any man.
Yes, the females need protection... If from nothing else, then at the very least, from all those OTHER horny bastards out there, who wish to fertilize them! So yes,l the deep-seated need for protection... I can see that...
And if not Government Almighty, then ***WHO ELSE*** will protect them from unlicensed interior decorators, and other nefarious booger-creatures??!!?
Also, why there are so many libertarian men with no girlfriends - we keep helpfully pointing this out to them.
Have you seen libertarian men?
I'm dead sexy, but most I've met are obese and have terrible neckbeards.
Say what you will about doughy white dudes, at least they're not wearing pajamas or sculpting their mustaches.
Like Ron Swanson & Mike Rowe?
But enough about me. I'm talking about real libertarian men. You know, the ones that go to conventions and stuff.
It is why libertarian men all have such firm handshakes.
I specifically have a weak handshake so as to not violate NAP.
Shake softly and carry a big pimp hand.
Do they make fedoras in lady sizes?
Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Cut Spending.
So close. It should be:
Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Cut Spending, F*** You.
I prefer the first, non-rhyming one. It's more to the point and creates the unexpected ending which is funny.
Roses are red, violets are blue, fuck you cut spending.
Discordant and authentic.
I presume the 'fuck you' (either interpretation) is implicit in Valentine's Day and beneath the decorum.
At least, I'm not talking about roses and violets because I like roses and violets or talking about them.
It's the unexpected that makes things funny.
For instance, when people ask me why I got divorced, I always say:
Well my wife and I were really complete opposites. For instance, I was a night person and she was a lesbian...
Relivant:
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-38966636
At the end, "Our aim is to crush this love capitalism."
"People like us who don't seek value in love are being oppressed by society," he added.
"It's a conspiracy by people who think unattractive guys are inferior, or losers - like cuddling in public, it makes us feel bad. It's unforgivable!"
Jeez, the Japanese Red Army needs to get laid.
This is hilarious.
Now if were Diddle Your Neighbor's Son Day, that's totes OK.
I love how every country that hates Valentines Day is Muslim or weirdo Japan.
Happy V-Day, my darling anarch0-frankentrumpkencucks-in-denial. 🙂
And you have the best VD ever!
I see what you did there.
To my libertarian Valentine:
I hate you a little bit less than I hate most people.
Send this to your babe & tell 'er you wroted it...
Red Neck Valentine
Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Your hair is like cornsilk a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.
You move like the bass, which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.
You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.
Still them fellers at work, they all want to know,
how I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.
Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.
When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.
Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,
we go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.
Some men git roses on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.
But for this man, honey, these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift, without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds . . . IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!
Luv, from yor romeo
Bubba
A haiku:
Today I have fear
My worry is that my life-
Is that the police?
republicans are red
democrats are blue
get off my lawn
partisan poo
"Without the family we are helpless before the State, which in our modern
case is the Servile State." (G. K. Chesterton, The Superstition of Divorce) Let's get hitched so we can screw each other and the state at the same time!
Nothing better than a Chesterton quote
And he probably wasn't the kind of person to turn down Valentine's candy, if you know what I mean
.
Republicans are Red, Democrats are Blue
They both suck, but I Love You
Or, if you're not into the whole "I love you" schtick:
Republicans are red
Democrats are blue
They both suck
But you're pretty cool
The wife knows I don't really do Valentine's Day. Luckily she's cool with going out for pizza for dinner at the best pizza place in the world (no exaggeration).
Dominos?
5.99 for a 2 topping large, this week only.
Why pay those egregious prices when the market has given me Little Caesars where I can get the same thing for 5 dollars?
My GF loves when I give her the 5$ Hot-And-Ready.
You charge $5 for your Hot-and-Ready? Isn't that a little on the cheap side?
I charge precisely what the market will bear.
I LOVE YOU BABY BUT TRUMP MUST BE STOPPED #RESIST
"You have the freedom to associate with my penis"
Too subtle?
"Why am I looking at you this way? Because I want to fuck you, that's why."
A Valentine from Jonathan Brown, a Muslim convert employed by Georgetown University to promote Christian/Muslim understanding -
"As for concubinage, there is no doubt that the Quran and Sunna permit this provided all the restrictions and qualifications are observed. It is, however, totally permissible for Muslims to administratively legislate that certain practices are illegal according to state law, as was done with (attempts) to ban tobacco in the early 1600's in the Ottoman Empire. Imam al-Maturidi in his Tawilat al-Quran specifies the possibility of abrogating Quranic permissions by ijma' of the community."
h/t Frontpagemag
PS - ISIS hasn't legislated against concubinage so apparently it's legal by default. And Brown makes clear that it's *forced* concubinage he has in mind.
So never mind Valentine's Day cards, just enslave an infidel woman.
just enslave an infidel woman
I think you're missing the point that you can't "enslave" an infidel woman any more than you can "enslave" a camel or a piece of furniture. Infidels are filthy animals who have no rights, infidel women doubly so. Does your camel have a right to free speech or freedom of conscience? It's absurd to even think in those terms, putting a halter and a lead on a camel doesn't violate any sort of "rights" since a camel isn't even capable of understanding the concept of rights.
"Please stop, all this talk of camels is making me horny."
Eddie, there is a great camel at the National Zoo. She has small humps, but a great personality.
There used to be a lot of beautiful camels in King Arthur's court. That's why it was called Camelot.
*makes eyes smaller*
Camels are called "ships of the desert" because they're full of Arab semen.
I read that as "putting a halter top" on a camel.
The Ottomans also loved to ban booze, despite just about every Sultan being a wastrel drunk.
It's just like 'Merika!
If there was a free market for prostitution, the price would be set by the opportunity cost of courtship for men at the margin of desirability.
Discuss.
That assumes that the only reason men court is for sex. Some of us also like love. Now, I am not saying you can't find love with a prostitute. I mean look at McAfee. But it's a lot less likely to happen that way.
You mean Hollywood lied to us?
Hmm, excellent point. It would be interesting to see how this played out in the market. Perhaps there would be prostitutes who specialize in emotional companionship to satisfy that demand. Or perhaps men looking for true love would simply not enter the market.
It would also be interesting to contrast the male and female, straight and gay markets. My completely unjustified opinion is that women would be *less* likely to pay for faux companionship, and so the market for male prostitutes would focus almost exclusively on sex.
Prostitutes? You considering voluntary sexual transactions on Craigslist, Grindr, and Tindr?
You know, the meat markets?
Read any interview with an actual prostitute and you'll find out that that is already what they do for a large percentage of their regular clients
I watched a Lisa Ling special on the Bunny Ranch, and it was pretty clear that was the case. Their most popular package was the "Girlfriend Experience".
Yeah, those lonely people so desperate for affection that they pay for it, and the women who give it, should definitely be executed for their crimes.
Well, your hyperbole aside, how much can you lie to yourself? Sex is one thing, but that is the unique nature of affection - you have to earn it. It can't be bought - it can only be given. Hell, even J-Lo sang "my love don't cost a thing". Paying for sex is sad but understandable. Paying for "affection" is just fucking delusional and pathetic...
The one dude they interviewed did not seem deluded by it. He knew what it was. It was just the closest thing he was ever going to get so it was worth it to him.
One of the brothels in NV hired a straight male whore, and he did not last long. Didn't bring in any money. Generally, women need to spend a couple hours flirting and talking before they'll want to fuck. Soonest I ever had sex with a dude was about 6 hours after meeting.
I wonder if it would work better with home-service.
It's expensive, though. You gotta pay for the whore's time, and spending a few hours talking to someone, and paying for it, with the possibility you won't find them attractive after all, seems like a huge waste of $.
Nope, the reality is for ~95% of women if they just want to get laid could do so within 24 hours, for 80% of them that time frame is closer to 4 hours without ever spending a dime. Given that there just isn't going to be too much money in it for heterosexual male prostitutes.
Hell I think you'd have a better time just selling the companionship with no sex involved to women.
I could easily see a market among upper middle class and higher single women paying for a hot guy to show up and take them out for a night on the town, listen to their stories, and fawn all over them and then dropping them off with no expectations of sex or a relationship
I'll take the waterboarding instead, thanks.
I would hate that. In the back of my mind, I would know it's all fake. Maybe a lot of women wouldn't mind, but I think many of us would not be that into it. Then there's the risk to the whore/escort that he would be so good at it that the women would think "well, he really means it with me! He's my boyfriend!"
Given that there just isn't going to be too much money in it for heterosexual male prostitutes.
Especially given that men, in that regard, are cheaply and more reliably *ahem* automated. Yeah.
Hell I think you'd have a better time just selling the companionship with no sex involved to women.
Supply-demand. Sure, you'd be able to sell it if men weren't charging consulting fees for it. As it is, women pay other women $15/mo. at the checkout line for their relationship/consulting fees.
"Hell I think you'd have a better time just selling the companionship with no sex involved to women."
Again, how does that work so that it isn't just the saddest thing you've ever witnessed?
"Hi! Pay me money and I'll act like a pleasant and agreeable person who likes you despite the fact that you have no redeeming qualities and that over the course of your entire life you couldn't find ONE of these actual people from the entire population of planet Earth!"
Gah!
For example.
TW: Vice.
Go on...
Boring, same old story - he was with the band. Yadda yadda...
It was the drummer, wasn't it.
Please. Manager. He looked like Jim Morrison.
You Yadda'd the best part! /franticCostanza
Generally, women need to spend a couple hours flirting and talking before they'll want to fuck
But I wonder if the clientele for male prostitutes would self-select for women who just want sex? The market might be small but it would still split in the way I bull-shitted.
Soonest I ever had sex with a dude was about 6 hours after meeting.
Go on ...
I think this is largely true.
Sure men may seek sex more than women but in my experience men are the more needy sex when it comes to companionship and pairbonding and in general men have a harder time dealing with seperating their emotions from sex than women do.
Wow. Really? Titty bars have crying rooms?
Yeah, they're called Titty Bars.
Yeah, they're called Titty Bars.
As opposed to the women's version that's pretty much any room in which you can be alone or consume wine, cookie dough, or ice cream.
This all assumes a strict/primal/axiomatic biological individuality which is a retarded non-sequitur for our species. Men start or are initially conditioned for independence and gradually become co-dependent. Women start co-dependent and eventually become independent. On a species level (much to Ron Bailey's and Social Progressivists chagrin), talking about men absent women (and vice versa) is like talking about a heart absent lungs (and vice versa) on a physiology level. Even absent reproductive or recreational sex, you could no more rationally purge women/men from the species than you could purge a race/culture from the species.
Not to say that single people are non-entities in any regard, but that from a long-term biological perspective, it's irrefutable.
That's why widowers get married WAY faster than widows (also, single men are in extremely short supply in general, and in almost nonexistent among the elderly, so women snatch up the widowers as soon as they come on the market. My dad was dating a year after my mom died, and married a year and 1/2 later. He was desperate. Could not live alone. My parents had a very traditional Mad Men-style relationship. So basically my dad is helpless)
I told my father that if my mother passed, I would arrange for his early demise if he made even the slightest noises about getting re-hitched. Have all the fun you want dad, but no Russian mail-order brides in the will allowed.
I told my dad the women would be circling like buzzards and he needed to look out for that. The chick he married seems so-so. I'm not worried about his finances with her, but more that she doesn't have great social manners, despite being a Southern belle.
So you want to take care of him? My dad is helpless and I sure as hell don't want to deal with that. I may try and hook him up at mom's funeral.
He could end up like my father. Twelve years after the passing of my mother (his second wife ? his first died young of cancer), he's still single and has no interest in dating despite being lonely and totally reliant on me to drive him everywhere (he's in good mental shape but no longer drives for physical reasons). This despite the admiring looks he gets each week from all the widows at church.
His simple logic: "Dating at my age would mean having to sleep with an old woman; who wants to do that?"
I think all these generalizations are rather pointless. People are individuals. Some men are more needy and some women are more needy.
Eh, I don't think so. There is actual data about this stuff. I find it interesting vis a vis cultural stereotypes about men and women and how they're kinda the opposite in real life.
Eh, I don't think so. There is actual data about this stuff. I find it interesting vis a vis cultural stereotypes about men and women and how they're kinda the opposite in real life.
A decent percentage of the time though, these studies are biased in a way that says more about the researchers than the subjects and principles under study.
Or possibly rather, you can be honest, unbiased, or refute stereotypes/cultural norms, pick 2.
I don't know - the data on how soon after a loss of a spouse someone gets remarried seems pretty cut-and-dried. Maybe the reasons why are nebulous.
They are not pointless but one does need to keep in mind they are generalizations.
The reason they matter is as Kristen notes they go directly against the way society is portrayed in mass media and political debates.
The common perception is that men are cold uncaring jerks always on the prowl for sex, that perception feeds into the narrative of men as sexual predators and all of them being just one step (or less) shy of a rapist. If that common perception is wrong, and several of our personal experiences as well as quite a bit of data indicates it is then that narrative is weakened.
Also, for women being portrayed as emotionally dependent and irrational.
Judging by some of the reactions I have gotten when saying "No thanks, good luck" to men on dating sites, men also have an irrationality and emotion problem.
Anyhoo, I think perception vs. reality is a fascinating topic regardless.
Kristen, you seem to be talking about a specific demographic here, though, in regards to widowers.
I think old men do tend to feel more helpless than old women because they go through a greater physical deterioration and were used to being physically dominant through most of their life.
I think the late in life changes are what changes the stereotypical male-female dynamics.
I've been dealing with In-laws in this regard and that observation really fits in their case.
People are individuals
Absolutely, but dominant market trends are set by the things that are common among individuals.
I'm not.
No one ever mentions loyalty.
Thanks for not being a whore.
This thread sums up both why libertarians are awesome and destined to be social outcasts. Also, why I come here.
Thanks for the reminder.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Leave me alone
And I'll leave you alone, too.
This year my Valentine's gift was an audiobook of The Fountainhead narrated by Alan Greenspan. He really highlights the latent eroticism of those tall, steel buldings.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Lew Rockwell says,
FUCK THE STATE
Lew used to say that. Now he says "have sex with the State if it keeps the ferners out."
OT: this is why good (ie connected) lawyers are worth the money. I don't know how she only gets 9 months for this.
http://nbc4i.com/2017/02/14/co.....in-prison/
would (tho she has the beady eyes of a killer)
Yeah, I think if you left the bar with her, a couple of guys would be waiting outside to rob you.
And she'd be all like "you have to kill him! he saw my face!" which doesn't make sense but is the crazy sort of shit that would probably work with her killer-mook mind-slaves.
she's straight out of a David Lynch movie.
And yes, "Killer Mook Mind-Slaves" is already my band's name
Nice
There's a 'korean animated news' video of it
*Taiwanese. Their weather girls are fun, even if they only give Vancouver weather.
+1 Yanet Garcia
being able to tell asians apart must be some mystical canadian skill.
When they employ her you remember when she says she's Taiwanese.
Also, the constant shitting on the PRC and "TAIWAN NUMBAH ONE" tends to be a dead giveaway.
That is really weird.
I don't know how she only gets 9 months for this.
It's right in the article.
She went to jail for good ol' obstruction of justice in exchange for not being charged with anything worse.
Why the hell is that defense attorney's name so familiar?
It sounds like a joke-vulgarity. "I don't give a Sam Shamansky WHAT you told your mother, you're grounded!"
Sam "The Sham" Shamansky. Does he wear his turban to court?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JsWFpf1V80w
Because he's a character in a popular FOX animated comedy show?
This thread is a great example why I come here. Our "Valetines Day" thread features prostitution, titty bars, sex slavery, beastiality, misogyny, and crude pick up lines. Where else are you going to get all of that?
And yet sodomy has not come up at all.
Is Reason revising its "Ass sex, Mexicans and pot" motto?
West coast hasn't joined yet?
4chan.
This is why libertarians don't get any nookie.
So PewDiePie just got banned.
What's a PewDiePie?
What the fuck is a "PewDiePie"?
Are you allowed to make that distinction anymore? Just like any off-color joke is abject mean-spirited racism regardless of context, any provocation is deliberate incitement to violence, context be damned.
Things like that are kept purposely vague so Youtube has maximum deference on whether or not to ban things.
What in the world is a PewDiePie?
He's a Youtube celebrity who posts videos of himself playing video games and commenting on them. He is very popular, has millions of followers, and has made 10s of millions of dollars over the last several years.
He got a deal with Disney recently, but a few days ago he posted a video that is supposedly anti-Semitic (I say supposedly, only because I haven't seen it, not in an attempt to downgrade anything he might have said). So Disney killed their contract.
No way, the guy who makes rape jokes got banned under Youtube's new system. Never saw that coming.
To be clear, this guy was dropped by Disney from the media vehicle they had bought. He's still on Youtube.
ok, but are the offending-videos? (i can't be bothered to check)
I'm not sure the offending video was ever on youtube, only on Disney's platform. In any event I think Salesman is probably right, Youtube is trying to thread the needle with maximum ambiguity so they don't risk pissing off their most popular content creator, while leaving enough wiggle room to do so if the social justice plebs raise enough of a stink.
WaPo seems less ambiguous
actually seems more bait-switchy, where they say, "Ended business ties", but in actuality seem to "be punishing selected elements of their business relationship"
i don't know anything about PewDiewhatever but i do recall seeing a lot of videos like a year ago where everyone was worried about Youtube's new user-agreement which suggested they would be policing content.
there was some pushback by Googs/Youtube saying, "no silly, we're totally free speech, this is just for new stuff and its only...." basically downplaying it. Never heard much about it since.
What i find funny about Facebook/Twitter/Youtube's "Content Policing" of stuff that is 'racist' or offensive is that they don't really do it in any truly content-based way; they seem to do it in a *popularity* based way.
meaning - people like Milo got banned from twitter for doing shit that millions of trolls do. but the millions of trolls still do the same stuff and he got booted. its not because of what he did, its because he was "known".
If they policed the millions of trolls, it would take effort and time and cost $ to do. Instead, they ban a few high-profile people, presumably because it will send a stronger message to everyone else.
(like the above person telling us all about a guy getting banned)
I know that they've been policing content as the contributors' audience expands. There was a thing awhile back where a group had to drop the word 'Pimps' from their channel title because it basically amounted to them being treated like second-class citizens by youtube.
Meanwhile, I can find plenty of alt-right talk shows and/or propaganda that don't get any attention because their views are in the low thousands.
yeah, that's basically what i'm talking about. they create "tiers" of content-classes, and they only bother policing the Tier1 stuff, and basically leave the lower-viewership content alone.
which i guess makes sense. and... given that, 'censorship is only something the govt can do', etc.... is entirely within YT rights to farm their best-revenue-generating content from the weeds of user-created garbage.
but i still think its very selective and sometimes self-contradictory. I mean, i would guess that someone like Alex Jones probably gets lots of (((insinuating))) quasi 'anti-Semitic' remarks through in his channel... and that's his draw. Whereas this Pew fella is supposed to be fuzzy-cuddly and not stray into 'controversial' stuff. so they'll police one dude for 'slipping' and crossing the invisible line, whereas someone else could probably pump the same sort of stuff out all day long and be ignored.
at that point they are sort of crossing the line into editorializing people's work from afar, but without ever telling their content-creators what the editorial guideline is supposed to be. Its a shitty setup that leaves creators in the dark.
if you see my point; its
Is the ban new? Or are you talking about Disney and Youtube cutting their specific contracts they have with him? Because his Youtube page is still there.
What on earth is in a PewDie Pie, and where do I get one?
Youtube video game guy, and Sweden.
My personal fave:
"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
and taxation is theft."
"There are no libertarian women so you'll have to do"
-every H&R Valentine card
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How about "I swore on a stack of Ayn Rand novels never to live my life for the sake of another, but you're okay to hang out with?"
Put the question mark outside of the quotes and it's not bad.
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