A.M. Links: Cubs Win World Series, Presidential Election 5 Days Away, British Court Rules Parliament Must Vote on Brexit

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  • YouTube / ABC

    The presidential election is five days away.

  • New poll: Hillary Clinton 45 percent, Donald Trump 42 percent, Gary Johnson 5 percent, Jill Stein 4 percent.
  • Another new poll: Hillary Clinton 47 percent, Donald Trump 45 percent, Gary Johnson 3 percent, Jill Stein 2 percent.
  • The Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians last night to win the World Series.
  • "A senior British court on Thursday dealt a severe blow to Prime Minister Theresa May's plans to begin the process of exiting the European Union early next year, ruling she must get Parliament's approval before she acts."
  • Iraqi forces are now entering the city of Mosul.

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  1. The presidential election is five days away.

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. I’ll let out a sigh of relief once it’s all over. It’s going to be a long 5 days.

      1. You misspelled “four years.”

    2. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Immigrant Song? Really? I don’t think so. It’s Duh-duh, duh-duh, duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh. And then Roy Scheider backs slowly into the cabin and tells Donald Trump, “You’re gonna need a bigger vote”

      1. Ever notice the similarity between the Immigrant Song and the theme to Get Smart?

        1. Oh no, does this mean Bill Dana is going to sue Led Zeppelin?

          Irving’s dead and I can’t imagine the royalties from the famous Sammy Davis episode of All In The Family is paying many bills…

      2. That’s “Ahhh-ahhhhhhhh-ahhhhhhhhhhhh AH!” And we’re so much worried about the ones who come from the land of ice and snow, if you haven’t been paying attention.

        1. Canadians?

          1. Matt Labash on Canada:

            “North America’s attic, a mildewy recess that adds little value to the house, but serves as an excellent dead space for stashing Nazi war criminals, drawing room socialists, and hockey goons.”

            1. Canada on Matt Labash:

              “What a hoser.”

              1. Point Labash.

        2. But the hammer of the gods drove their ships to new lands, so worrying about it is blasphemy

        3. Whitewalkers.

    3. Comey says no reasonable prosecutor would bring charges. That’s called…

      …wait for it…

      a vaginal discharge!

      1. {slow golf clap}

    4. Hello.

      1. Greetings and salutations, Canadian Earthling.

    5. Eat my shorts.

      1. Dude, the 80’s called and it said that you’re grody to the max.

  2. 252) Maybe I’m a bad parent, but this whole thing about the alleged marijuana lollipops?who cares? Not that I would intentionally give my kids one, but if they happened to ingest one without my knowledge, no big deal. Won’t do ’em any harm. Might even improve their behavior. I would be more worried if it were LSD or something, but pot doesn’t strike me as a reason to panic.

    I know right now if I said this to practically any other parent at my kids’ school they would regard me as insane, but I simply fail to see what there is to worry about here.

    1. Are you high right now?

      1. It’s like Go Ask Alice up in here.

        1. You’ve just had some kind of mushroom.

    2. If you said that to any parent at your kids’ school, they’d call CPS on you in a half a heartbeat.

      1. Yeah, I pretty much keep my mouth shut at back-to-school night.

    3. It really depends on the kid. I noticed that my friends that had really bad ADHD had really bad side effects with pot, and avoided it due to the fact I have a less severe case. They got really stoner lazy, really fast. I know it’s not nearly the same for all people, and it probably would help you talk to your kids about their individual reaction to a drug, and whether it’s a good idea for them to do it or not.

      1. and it probably would help you talk to your kids about their individual reaction to a drug, and whether it’s a good idea for them to do it or not.

        I think this is a good idea for alcohol as well. A general “keep your head about you, even when you’re having fun” talk is a good one to have. There are enough people who piss away their potential in college because they have no sense of self control, no need to add more to the pile.

        1. This past weekend we had a little party at our house and invited all the neighbors over. One of them has a son who is about 15. I asked the parents early on if they were okay with their kid having a beer (first time we’d had them over, if I caught the kid trying to sneak one out of the cooler or whatever I didn’t want to smack it out of his hand if it turned out they were okay with it). They looked at me like I had a nipple growing on my forehead and were shocked, shocked that I might suggest their child would even consider touching alcohol before he’s of-age. Of course they’re relying on the school to teach him about booze.

          Living in Europe for a few years has really, really exposed just how insane the US is about alcohol.

          1. Living in Europe for a few years has really, really exposed just how insane the US is about alcohol.

            The entire American concept that you completely forbid kids from having alcohol until they go off on their own without adult guidance is a recipe for exactly what we see: binge drinking, glorified alcoholism, DUIs, and alcohol poisoning.

            1. What’s even weirder to me is how similar we treat coffee. Coffee for Pete’s sake. In Europe, eight year old drink it with afternoon snacks. In America, nobody under 20 seems to touch the stuff, let alone be offered it by a restaurant server.

    4. JATNAS you might be suffering from low levels of hysteria. I’m sure a doctor could prescribe you something to get you back in the realm of goodthink.

  3. The Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians last night to win the World Series.

    You know who else beat Indians?

    1. Hey! Get back in the kitchen!

    2. The Florida Marlins. You really could have looked that up yourself.

      1. Just goes to show, Florida Man always beats Ohio Man

        1. They have a fight, Florida wins, Florida man.

    3. Colin Campbell, the 1st Baron Clyde?

    4. Every other team in MLB?

      1. Except Toronto

        1. Thank god for Toronto, or we really couldn’t call it the “world” series, could we?

          1. Nobody counts them, the ‘World’ reference comes from old reference to the Expos.

            They don’t even speak English there.

    5. The 7th Cavalry at Wounded Knee?

    6. Andrew Jackson?

      1. damn. ok. Oliver Otis Howard

    7. Andrew Jackson

    8. Colonel Reginald Dyer?

    9. Seen on the street in CLE…link

    10. Turkmenistan, 2-1

    11. The Franciscans?

    12. The Jesuits

    13. Other Indians?

    14. Harley-Davidsons?

    15. The British Empire?

    16. DAPL security guards?

    17. The Houston Astros on Sep 5th?

      /6 – 2

    18. Hawkeye?

  4. The presidential election is five days away.

    And the *following* presidential election is about four years and five days away, God willing.

    1. The big question for 2020 is whether it will be Pence or Kaine running for reelection.

      1. Or “None of the above”, God willing.

        1. Give the elite some time. They’ll shake the bushes again and see if a candidate falls out.

          1. Shake the Bushes again, more like.

    2. Actually, the real election is December 19th.

      1. Do tell ….

        1. Electors vote on December 19 and the votes are counted on January 6, 2017.

          1. No, he’s talking about when the Bilderbergers and the Illuminati vote. That’s December 19, but not the same December 19 you know.

            1. +13 days Julian

  5. Dr. Strange looks awesome. That is all.

      1. Indeed. Unless it gets really good reviews I’ll wait to watch it on an airplane.

        1. 91% positive on Rotten Tomatoes, and 71 (so an average rating of about 7/10) on Metacritic. It’s pulling pretty good reviews.

          1. I don’t understand. It has a male lead. In fact afaik it’s pushing no social justice agenda. How on earth can it be any good?

            1. It also has a white girl who is supposed to be Asian or something. I heard that in passing.

            2. Tilda Swinton is playing an asexual fella in a comic book movie again?

    1. I predict an uptick in acid sales.

      1. Is that on the ballot anywhere? Roadtrip!

    2. “Dr. Strange” was my nickname in college.

      1. and in college too!

      2. It was just “Mr. Strange,” then you crossed Walter Block.

      3. More like “Dr. Strangelove”.

  6. Ecosexuals Believe Having Sex with the Earth Could Save It

    Jennifer Reed, a PhD candidate in sociology at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, is writing a dissertation on ecosexuality, and says that the number of people who identify as ecosexuals has increased markedly in the past two years. And Google search data confirms that interest in the term has spiked dramatically over the past year. We may look back on 2016 as the year ecosexuality hit the mainstream.

    Ecosexuality is a term with wide-ranging definitions, which vary depending on who you ask. Amanda Morgan, a faculty member at the UNLV School of Community Health Sciences who is involved in the ecosexual movement, says that ecosexuality could be measured in a sense not unlike the Kinsey Scale: On one end, it encompasses people who try to use sustainable sex products, or who enjoy skinny dipping and naked hiking. On the other are “people who roll around in the dirt having an orgasm covered in potting soil,” she said. “There are people who fuck trees, or masturbate under a waterfall.”

    1. C’mon, the sexual politics folks are just looking to add another letter to their ever-metastasizing LGBTQQSLV thing, right?

      1. Eventually they’ll add enough letters to spell out a really elaborate acronym.

    2. STEVE SMITH ECORAPE SUSTAINABLY

      1. STEVE SMITH ABLE TO SUSTAIN RAPE FOR LONG TIME!

    3. Onan spilled his seed on the ground. Does that make him the first ecosexual?

      1. “Better than on the belly of a whore!”

    4. “masturbate under a waterfall”

      I saw this movie.

      1. Women and children downstream hardest hit.

    5. Does tossing a spent condom out the window of your car and into a stream count?

    6. Jennifer Reed, a PhD candidate in sociology at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas

      Oh the humanities.

      1. Just bend her over a fallen log. She’ll quit spiking trees very quickly.

      2. Sociology, so not humanities.

    7. So they’re ‘Treebuggerers”?

    8. At some point these people’s fellow academics are going to have to step in and smother them with a pillow.

    9. Wrong kind of bush.

    10. And Google search data confirms that interest in the term has spiked dramatically over the past year

      If it’s not yet a thing on Pornhub I’m not taking it seriously.

      1. Rule 34 says you’re not using the right search term.

    11. who enjoy skinny dipping

      OPPRESSION! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME IDENTIFY AS THAT!

    12. masturbate under a waterfall

      OPPRESSION! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME IDENTIFY AS THAT!

      1. But the videos were on the Weiner machine.

        1. The Weiner Machine was Crusty’s other nickname in college.

          1. “Doctor Strange, The Weiner Machine”?

            1. lol’d

    13. When I am king, we will make all necessary accommodations for these ecosexuals in my system of death camps.

    14. Science.

    15. I’m just surprised this link isn’t from everydayfeminism.

    16. — We may look back on 2016 as the year ecosexuality hit the mainstream.

      Prediction: We won’t

  7. New poll: Hillary Clinton 45 percent, Donald Trump 42 percent, Gary Johnson 5 percent, Jill Stein 4 percent.

    Another new poll: Hillary Clinton 47 percent, Donald Trump 45 percent, Gary Johnson 3 percent, Jill Stein 2 percent.

    Weld just needs to do a little more on the stump to get Clinton some more separation from the pack.

    1. Hillary Clinton 45 percent

      MANDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      1. And that’s just the people who vote, which is about half the number who could.

        1. Too busy. This Big Mac ain’t going to eat itself.

        2. Actually, among voters who are certain how they will vote, Trump’s up by 3.

          http://www.rasmussenreports.com/publi…..watch_nov3

          1. That poll shows Trump +3 with everyone.

            Among people who are certain how they will vote, Trump is up by 10.

          2. 3? No, not three–

            “Eighty-eight percent (88%) of voters say they are now certain how they will vote. Among these voters, Trump has a 10-point lead over Clinton ? 53% to 43%. Johnson gets two percent (2%) and Stein one percent (1%). This is the first time any candidate has crossed the 50% mark.”

    2. Weld is too stupid to understand that his endorsing vouching for Clinton probably nets additional votes for Trump.

      1) Trump voters aren’t going to change their mind.
      2) Hillary voters aren’t going to change their mind.
      3) Libertarian voters who become thoroughly disgusted by the piss-poor Johnson/Weld campaign will either sit it out, write-in Ron Paul or someone, vote Stein for the superiority of her foreign policy instincts, or vote Trump as lesser of two really bad evils. Walter Block makes a libertarian case for Trump. It’s a weak argument, and I don’t buy it, but there is no libertarian argument for Hillary Clinton. Only Trump Derangement Syndrome could explain a libertarian voting for Hillary.
      4) Libertarian activists and other LP-leaning voters who are not thoroughly disgusted by the piss-poor Johnson/Weld campaign will still vote libertarian.
      5) Wishy washy, low-information independent voters don’t watch MSNBC, don’t know who Bill Weld is, only have a hazy grasp on the facts of all the Clinton scandals, and really could not care less about whether Weld vouches for Hillary Clinton’s integrity.

      Writing those words – “Weld vouches for Hillary Clinton’s integrity” – even tempts me to vote Trump to repudiate Weld.

      1. 4D Chess moves.

    3. I’ve been following this one, which has them dead even nationally, with Gary drifting down by the day: http://www.investors.com/polit…..tion-poll/

      Trump’s chances have been creeping steadily up on FiveThirtyEight for the last couple of weeks. 35% right now.

  8. University Paid For Bigfoot Expedition

    Bigfoot is widely considered by scientists to be a myth. But the University of New Mexico spent more than $7,000 on expenses for a February conference and an expedition (unsuccessful, as scientists won’t be surprised to learn) to look for Bigfoot, KRQE News reported. Among the expenses were snowshoes for those on the expedition.

    “I use discretionary funds for things that I think are of merit. That could include fieldwork of some kind of research of some kind,” said Christopher Dyer, head of the university’s Gallup campus, who has long spent some of his free time looking for Bigfoot. “People use monies from the taxpayers to do research. For Bigfoot or whatever.”

    Robert Frank, the university’s president, said, “Dr. Dyer needs to be much more thoughtful about how he undertakes these activities. The type of expedition that just took place was not appropriate and will not occur in that manner again.”

      1. “I am pretty sure I heard rumors of Bigfoot on Vanuatu.” – Professor, planning next ‘expedition’

    1. STEVE SMITH READY TO DEVOTE OTHER BODIES TO SCIENCE

      1. AND BY “SCIENCE,” STEVE SMITH MEAN “RAPE.”

        1. AND BY “RAPE”, STEVE SMITH MEAN RAPE-RAPE!

    2. All that money diverted from chupacabra research. It’s criminal.

      1. Especially since you can actually dissect a chupacabra.

        1. +1 coyote with mange

    3. More Science.

    4. Hey paying for scientists to go to a Bigfoot conference or on an expedition could have a lot of scientific merit.

      Not actually looking for a non existent Hairy Ape but rather to study the culture and psychology of people who insist on believing things long after they have been proven false

      1. STEVE SMITH APPRECIATE CAMOUFLAGE EFFORT, BUT IS OK WITH BEING KNOWN.

        1. AFTER ALL, STEVE SMITH ALREADY KNOW YOU. IN BIBLICAL SENSE OF “TO KNOW.”

  9. New poll: Hillary Clinton 45 percent, Donald Trump 42 percent, Gary Johnson 5 percent, Jill Stein 4 percent.

    Another new poll: Hillary Clinton 47 percent, Donald Trump 45 percent, Gary Johnson 3 percent, Jill Stein 2 percent.

    Chances Weld looses his shit on Election Day if Team GayJay is the margin of difference between Trump and Hillary?

    1. 100%. But only if Trump wins.

  10. The Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians last night to win the World Series.

    End of Days: confirmed.

    1. The antichrist has revealed himself, and his name is Theo.

      Damn joos.

      1. NEEDZ MOAR DOOMSDAY BOMBS!

    2. *Buys shovel to dig bunker

  11. Model with ‘biggest bum in Africa’ and curves like Kim Kardashian earns army of fans with saucy videos

    A model with a backside that could make Kim Kardashian jealous has become a social media sensation thanks to her astonishing rear end .

    Ivory Coast-born Eudoxie Yao claims to have the biggest butt in the whole of West Africa.

    Her astonishingly large backside is believed to be the biggest on the entire continent.

    As the footage and pictures show, she also has quite the cleavage too.

    Eudoxie, from Abidjan in the Ivory Coast, grinds her eye-popping figure around wearing skin-tight cat suits in a series of social media videos that have earned her thousands of followers.

    1. Well, now we know why John hasn’t been around lately.

      1. I figured he was too busy writing more “Why I’m Still Voting for Trump” articles for Trucker Hat Daily.

    2. Eudoxie got a big ole butt
      I know I told you I’d be true
      But Eudoxie got a big ole butt
      So I’m leavin’ you

      1. The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin’
        That’s what I said
        The looser the waistband, the deeper the quicksand
        Or, so I have read.

      1. Thank god I haven’t had breakfast yet.

        1. I took a shit in West Africa once.

    3. She looks like every other woman in my apartment complex.

      1. Racist.

        1. Are they all stealing sacks of potatoes, too?

    4. 2016’s Saartjie Baartman exploits herself. Progress!

    5. Steatopygia or GTFO.

    6. Very unlikely that is the biggest butt in Africa, but she’s a strong contender for largest butt to waist ratio.

      1. I’m into T&A as much as the next man, butt there’s nothing sexy about lipodystrophy.

    7. Not clicking
      Not clicking
      Not clicking

  12. Trump voters: Stand by for Incoming

    Fort Lauderdale, Florida seems an unlikely place to launch an attack on civilians, but that’s where Granny chose to roll out the Gatling gun. To wit: “?you know, I am sick and tired of the negative, dark, divisive, dangerous vision and behavior of people who support Donald Trump,” Mrs. Clinton fumed.

    Did you catch it — it’s those ghastly Trump people, who are “negative, dark, divisive and dangerous.” Forget “deplorables and unredeemables” — that was just a little old .38 Special she had hidden in her glove compartment for emergencies. This baby here is a Gatling gun because it’s a rapid-fire, spring loaded, hand cranked weapon akin to a Rotary Cannon. Yes indeed, a Gatling gun takes down everything in its path and Mrs. Clinton is ready to take up her assault weapon and stick it to each and every Trump voter who crosses her path.

    Funny thing is, hardly anyone noticed she brought out the heavy artillery. Media outlets ran her angry, red-faced comment but no one seemed to notice that her aim was squarely on Trump voters rather than the man himself.

    1. It’s hard for me to tell what’s a metaphor and what’s literal in those paragraphs.

      1. Poe’s law in action.

    2. “you know, I am sick and tired of the negative, dark, divisive, dangerous vision and behavior of people who support Donald Trump,” Mrs. Clinton fumed.”

      Why is she trying so hard to get me to vote for Trump? I refuse!

      1. She wants to unite us alright

    3. Is she taiking about Trump voters or her agents provocateur pretending to be Trump voters?

    4. This baby here is a Gatling gun because it’s a rapid-fire, spring loaded, hand cranked weapon akin to a Rotary Cannon. Yes indeed, a Gatling gun takes down everything in its path and Mrs. Clinton is ready to take up her assault weapon and stick it to each and every Trump voter who crosses her path.

      Holy Crap, suck it up, Donner. You will survive this… mild insulting.

  13. “Stay on point, Donald,” the hat whispered, “Stay on point.”

    “Stay on point, Donald,” Donald told the crowd, “Stay on point.”

    “No, you idiot,” the hair hissed to the hat.

    “Don’t blame me!” the hat whispered in an urgent aside.

    “Stay on track, Donald,” Donald told the crowd, “Stay on track.”

    “Who told him to say that?” the hair squawked.

    The hat squeezed his head tightly to try to quiet the candidate. The hair brushed the candidate with tender tendrils to try and smooth them. But the crowd just laughed, their eyes glazed with stupidity, and both the hat and hair relaxed.

    1. “Hillary Clinton is unhinged,” Donald said. “She is the candidate of the yesterday. We are the movement of the future. I am the future. Flying cars are the future. Blankets that turn into capes are the future. Laser guns and wookie hookers are the future. I am the future.”

      “Shut him down! Shut him down!” the hat screamed.

      The crowd was growing uncomfortable, quiet and shifting their weight nervously from foot to foot. The speech was veering from the playbill they had been given when the handlers had flushed them off the bus. The applause lines were off schedule. They just wanted to go to an Indian casino like they had been promised.

      “I will replace my yuge penis with a cattleprod in the future!” Donald continued. “Can I hear an ‘Amen?'”

      “Amen?” the crowd mumbled, more a confused question.

      “I love you, Ohio!” Donald told the Floridian crowd. He turned stiffly and walked awkwardly and heavily to his tour bus.

      1. More! Please, more!

      2. Oh, NOW you decide to branch into non-fiction?

      3. “wookie hookers are the future”

        They’re naturally eco-sexual.

      4. Well, at least there was a penis reference.

        1. I’ve got to keep your mom happy.

          1. Mom jokes are cultural appropriation.

            1. From whom? Winston?

              1. Anthropology has an entire subdiscipline devoted to the subject.

          2. Lets lay off the mom jokes, because I just got off yours?

      5. Blankets that turn into capes are the future.

        Don’t know why, but this was my favorite part of the story.

  14. Man arrested after allegedly exposing himself to other man; wires attached to private parts

    Boynton Beach police responded to a report of a sex crime at the 100 block of Orange Drive.

    The victim told police he saw a naked man driving a four-door Toyota slowly through the neighborhood.

    Police said the suspect, later identified as Kurt Allen Jenkins, drove by the victim and gestured for the victim to look towards his groin area. That’s when the victim saw an electronic device with wires attached to Jenkins’ penis, the victim told police.

    The victim turned down Jenkins’ advances and called police, they said.

    1. Citizen X will be in his bunk.

      1. I love technology. In that way.

    2. If I called the cops every time I got hit on, I’d do nothing but call cops all day. And I’d have to call the cops on those cops because of all the advances they’d make while taking my statement. Who needs the hassle? So, in conclusion, just let the original guy suck your dick.

      1. “I’d do nothing but call cops all day.”
        You would be shot dead before noon

      2. You sound like the guy about to implode on the stand in the latest episode of Lore and Odor, SVU.

    3. New meaning of “cybersex”?

    4. Life is hard for electro-sexuals.

      1. But tingly

  15. thanks, ma!

    Parents ‘injected children with feel-good heroin’

    Ashlee Hutt, 24, and Leroy McIver, 25, allegedly drugged their son, six, and daughters, four and two, in their filthy Washington home filled with rat droppings and used needles.

    Child Protective Services (CPS) launched an investigation in November last year after someone in the house claimed they saw the children with the drug, Kiro7 reported.

    According to a probable cause affidavit, the six-year-old told investigators “his mum and dad give him and his sisters the ‘feel-good medicine'” which “he described as a white powder which was mixed with water”. He said his parents “used a needle to inject the ‘feel-good medicine’ into him and his sisters.”

    1. Are there incriminating emails too?

        1. “feel-good medicine'”

          Is there any other kind of heroin?

  16. “Hillary Clinton 45 percent, Donald Trump 42 percent, Gary Johnson 5 percent, Jill Stein 4 percent.”

    Johnson needs to drop Weld and get Stein to join him as VP. Instant 9%!

    1. Johnson needs to drop Weld acid and get Stein to join him as VP. Instant 9%!

      1. At this point in time, Stein would be a far better choice for VP.

        1. Stein — Just as shitty a libertarian; less likely to endorse Hitlery.

  17. “A senior British court on Thursday dealt a severe blow to Prime Minister Theresa May’s plans to begin the process of exiting the European Union early next year, ruling she must get Parliament’s approval before she acts.”

    Also she must win four out of seven cricket matches, pre-Marylebone Cricket Club rules, and get the lorries to deliver extra lifts and torches to the tossers in Worcestershire before Manchester United’s next match.

    1. Your ignorance amuses me. She only has to eat a bucket of whelks while queefing “Land of Hope and Glory”.

      It’s actually a pretty interesting issue – the contemporary scope and nature of the royal prerogative.

    2. That “last chance for the Right People to save England from making a terrible decision” is going to be interesting. I’m pretty sure most members of Parliament are “the Right People” so there’s a few that are going to have to look at their districts and decide “will I lose my position by doing the Right Thing?” As close as the vote was, I can’t see very many going the other way – voting for the exit even if their district voted to stay. So do you bow to The Will of the People even though you think they’re silly-ninny goat bladders or do you vote your conscience because you’ve got your nose stuck so high in the air you can’t see your fly’s unzipped and your dick’s hanging out and everybody’s laughing at what an arrogant pompous twaddle-gartered ass you are?

      1. OTOH it seems unlikely that conditions in Europe will not continue declining. Time is going to make more Brexit voters, not fewer.

    3. And perform the Bron-y-Aur Stomp.

      1. Not as difficult as Bron-yr-aur

        But the Stomp is funkier.

    4. A senior British court on Thursday dealt a severe blow to Prime Minister Theresa May’s plans to begin the process of exiting the European Union early next year, ruling she must get Parliament’s approval before she acts.

      I can’t see what could possibly go wrong.

  18. The Chicago Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians last night to win the World Series.

    I don’t really watch baseball anymore (I’m a Pittsburgh sports fan and so many losing seasons tends to depress interest), but this series was a lot of fun. Postseason sports in general tend to be great (except for basketball, which is almost never good). I wish there was a way to capture my interest like that in the regular season.

    Also, I think we need *more* sports in our lives. It’s a mostly non-destructive, not-very-consequential way for people to satisfy their tribal urges.

    1. But I notice that I’ve become less passionate about sports in general over the years. I’m still a fan but not as emotionally invested as I once was. The Penn State scandal was emotionally draining, but it’s not like there haven’t still been teams for me to cheer for. I wonder if my movement towards a more self-aware libertarianism/individualism has curbed some of the collectivist parts of my nature that had me interested in sports. I hope that’s not the case because I think with the right outlet that sort of collectivism can actually be quite rewarding.

      OK, I’m done spouting off pseudo-intellectual BS that I just came up with in the last 5 minutes.

      1. I feel pretty much the same way. A couple of years ago I made the decision that I wasn’t going to let the actions of a bunch of 18-25 year olds dictate my emotions. Of course now that I don’t care as much the teams I like are actually good.

        1. I’m more than happy to let it affect me, it just doesn’t seem to as much. A big reason for that is probably that I’m not in an area with lots of sports fans and no real professional team to root for, and my friends who are into sports live elsewhere. It’s just not as much fun on your own. At least the wife enjoys hockey.

          1. College football is my usual pick-me-up, but this season as been a bit of a meh.
            I will take a slight exception with your statement “except for basketball, which is almost never good” in that March Madness rocks, but agree in regards to pro hoops.

            1. You guys are insane. NBA is the best sports league in the world.

              1. In any given year, maybe three teams have a chance to win a title. It’s predictable as hell.

                1. That’s better than a 9-7 team getting hot and winning a Super Bowl. I don’t want to see shitty teams playing over their heads at exactly the right time; I want to see excellence prevail.

                  In the NBA, mediocre teams seldom win titles, 1978, 1995, and 2006 notwithstanding.

              2. I struggle to work up any energy caring about which set of millionaires wins a pro game

              3. You guys are insane. NBA is the best sports league in the world.

                The players have outgrown the court, and it’s partially due to the way the games are officiated. If teams were actually allowed to play defense (like in college… notwithstanding their move away from allowing defense), it would capture my interest a little better. As it is, the best defender is the rim itself.

                I’m generally a defense-oriented fan. This explains my waning interest in the NFL as well as the NBA.

            2. Yeah, college football is my favorite. This year has actually been a pleasant surprise for me. I was expecting Penn State to struggle.

              My problem with basketball is that if the game is good only the last few minutes are worth watching, and if the game isn’t good none of it is worth watching. Basketball has too much scoring, so no one basket or defensive play or whatever is consequential except in the cases where it is close at the end (it’s actually a lot like voting).

              1. good points re: hoops. There are some ADHD channels for football scoring. One that shows only the final 2 minutes of basketball games might draw in viewers

              2. The last two minutes

                How does that not apply to literally every sport?

                1. Most other sports aren’t non-stop scoring like basketball

                2. Most sports have individual plays that are consequential and exciting, like a home run in baseball or a long touchdown in football. Those sports have a lot of downtime, too, but they are still exciting because one play can change the dynamic of a game at any time (unless it’s a total blowout).

                  Hockey is constant back and forth action like basketball but with less scoring (yes, that’s a good thing), so that any given goal is exciting.

                  I would define a good game as one in which the destination *and* the journey matter. In basketball it seems like the destination is the only part that matters.

      2. Same here. One day I got up and sports just wasn’t all that important. In the words of a crazy Russian taxi driver in NYC who told us while talking about soccer, ‘I go for every team. Milan, Madrid, Manchester. Anybody. It’s good for the heart.’

      3. When the Browns left from 1995-1999 I re-discovered Sunday afternoon … and that I had a wife and 3 kids.

        Since then I’ve come to realize that if you are only happy when your team wins you will be miserable about half the time (OK, in CLE it’s 99% of the time), so you had better just enjoy the entertainment and drama.

        1. Which is why I prefer college sports over the pros … more randomness in skill levels mixed with teenagers leads to more entertainment & drama

    2. I used to really, really love baseball (lifelong Cubs fan). It is a difficult sport to really get deep into when you have a lot of other things going on

    3. I don’t really watch baseball anymore (I’m a Pittsburgh sports fan and so many losing seasons tends to depress interest), but this series was a lot of fun.

      Fuck. You.

      1. No, really, fuck you. Pittsburgh has six titles since 1990. SIX! WE ONLY HAVE ONE WHY GOD WHY DO YOU HATE PHILADELPHIA SO MUCH ::breaks down sobbing::

        1. BOO, GOD! BOOOOOOO!

          – Philadelphia Fans

        2. Yeah, seriously. Pittsbugh has three pro teams, and two of those teams are marquee franchises with all of the benefits that status entails. The Buccos’ failure for 20 years to procure a management team which knew how to build in accordance with their small market status and the Pens’ ownership debacle twenty years ago is not nearly enough for Yinzers to start shouting “WOE IS ME MY TEAMS ALL SUCK” like they live in Minneapolis.

          1. /looks up at championship steins on display in office

            We’re going to need a bigger shelf.

          2. My comment was specific to baseball, though. My brother just started rooting for the Phillies since we grew up closer to that side of the state.

            1. Fans of sports other than baseball have a lot of hate/envy for Pittsburgh (especially to someone like me who roots for the Devils and Jets – thanks for Shero and Hynes, btw).

              I can understand why the Bucs would have dulled your interest in baseball. The problem with my loser franchise is that they win just enough, just often enough to keep hope alive and people like me interested.

              My kids are going to end up at far more Phillies games than Yankees simply because it’s so much easier (and cheaper) for me to get there. I wonder if that will overwhelm the impact of their parents’ loyalty.

          3. It wasn’t that long ago the Bugs were solid. I remember those Buc teams circa 1978 to 1992. Very good.

            1. And the two seasons previous to this one the Pirates were in the Wild Card. They just had the bad fortune of being in the same division as the Cardinals and the Cubs.

          4. like they live in Minneapolis.

            Hey, that’s not fair. The Vikings still have a good shot to lose another NFC Championship game this season.

      1. That’s just it though. I was excited by this year’s Cup but it was nowhere near as intense as in ’09.

        1. You went from being a smart person to being a dumb person in just one comment. What was it? Did you think they were just so dominant at the end of the season through the playoffs that it was a given they would lift it? Were you on mood altering drugs?

          1. Like I said, I honestly don’t know.

      2. I have no animosity towards the Pittsburgh teams. I loathe their fans though. I may be unlucky, but every Pittsburgh “fan” I have met couldn’t successfully name a single player on any of the teams.

        Stanley Cup conference finals last year, there was a Pittsburgh fan proclaiming loudly to everyone around that Jagr (pronounced by this guy as “Jay-ger”) was his favorite Pens player ever. He then tried to pick a fight with my wife when she called him an idiot for not even knowing how to pronounce his name. I was actually sad when he backed down – would have loved to see my wife tear him to pieces…

    4. satisfy their tribal urges

      Can I get a ruling from Swiss?

      1. Oddly, the collective term for a group of bears is a “sloth”. I would have guessed “riot”, “gang”, or “mob”.

        1. The sloth bear is also a type of bear native to India. Here is a picture of one bumming a ride.

          1. “Hey, uh, buddy?”

            “Yeah?”

            “…uh…nothing.”

            1. I love that picture so much. The bear looks stoked, the dude giving the bear a ride looks just completely over it. “Goddammit, this is the third time today.”

              1. “Let me guess, you want me to take you to a termite mound so you can snack….again.”

    5. I wish there was a way to capture my interest like that in the regular season.

      Sports bars, beer, and attractive waitresses help.

      1. That’s a good point. Unfortunately no sports bars in the new town.

        1. Where the hell did you move, Muleshoe?

          1. Central VA. There is actually a Buffalo Wild Wings down the interstate not *that* far. But I only just now learned that.

            1. Central VA

              What part? My thoughts and prayers may yet be with you, unless you’re in Petersburg, in which case they won’t help.

      2. Yeah but that is a totally different set of 18 to 25 year olds controlling your emotions

    6. I am huge Cleveland Indians fan, nearly since birth. I’m down, but I don’t get as emotional as I used to.

  19. NYPD Blows Whistle on New Hillary Emails: Money Laundering, Sex Crimes with Children, Child Exploitation, Pay to Play, Perjury

    “What’s in the emails is staggering and as a father, it turned my stomach,” the NYPD Chief said. “There is not going to be any Houdini-like escape from what we found. We have copies of everything. We will ship them to Wikileaks or I will personally hold my own press conference if it comes to that.”

    Film at Eleven!!

    1. There is not going to be any Houdini-like escape from what we found.

      Gonna be a Clinton-like escape.

    2. I don’t consider Truepundit to be very credible. I don’t think the chief of police of the NYPD would bluster like a character in a bad cop movie.

      1. I don’t consider Truepundit to be very credible.

        Hey!! It’s got “True” right in the name!!

      2. I have seen similar rumors elsewhere but don’t trust them either.

        I don’t think anything can be released since a grand jury has been empaneled. But, if there was a big evidence leak with credible evidence of this stuff… I might die of popcorn poisoning this weekend.

    3. Prosecutors in the office of US Attorney Preet Bharara have issued a subpoena for Weiner’s cell phones and travel records, law enforcement sources confirmed. NYPD said it planned to order the same phone and travel records on Clinton and Abedin, however, the FBI said it was in the process of requesting the identical records.

      Get ’em, Preet! I don’t know how reliable this True Pundit site is, but if Preet Fucking Bharara is the guy who takes down Hillary Clinton by way of Anthony Weiner’s dick, i will not know how to act.

      1. Woodchippers for all!

      2. Follow the dick!

      3. If Preet is the guy that takes down the Clintons, we should crowdfund a woodchipper for him. Just deliver it to his office with a note “With Love, from the Reason commenteriat”

        1. I’d pitch in. (Not a euphemism, I would contribute to that)

        2. I was thinking the same way. Maybe a miniature one so he? (for some reason, I though Preet was a she) doesnt get the wrong idea.

        3. I think I’d pitch in for that too.

        4. If we sent Preet a woodchipper he would be like “What the fuck?” I doubt he’s aware of the peculiar esteem in which we hold him here at Hit’n’Run.

        5. I’d also donate to that, though I don’t think he’d get the joke.

          Though being in NY, it might be smart to keep my hands out of it…

          1. That’s true of woodchippers anywhere in the country.

    4. this looks a lot like bullshit.

      1. Would have said the same thing 2 weeks ago if you told me Weiner was sexting on a laptop containing 650k Clinton related emails.

    5. If this were true, it would be on CNN front page. Nope, not there, so it can’t be true.

      1. /sarc

        And anyway, how would the NYPD know this? Doesn’t the FBI have the laptop?

        1. I think the NYPD had, took a look, realized they had a nuclear bomb on their hands, and handed it off to the Feds.

          1. I thought the deal was that the NYPD had seized it for local charges and sent it off to the FBI because the minor is out-of-state. So they’ve got the data, just not the laptop.

            1. That’s an interesting one. If that laptop has classified info on it, I’m not sure the NYPD is even allowed to look at it, since I don’t think they have the security clearances, IT systems, etc.

              Did they keep an image of the computer? I bet so. But if I was them, I’d be very careful about looking at it, at this point.

              1. They’d probably get in more trouble for the underage nudity since classification apparently no longer matters.

        2. Has anyone speculated whether the Russians have Weiner’s email trove (along, presumably, with his many tawdry exchanges)? He seems like a reasonable target: spouse of the aide of a top-level bureaucrat/presidential candidate, embroiled in scandals of his own, stupidly easy to catfish.

          1. I saw the usual anonymous leak saying that at least five foreign agencies had penetrated her email server.

            I’ve always thought there’s just no way a competent intelligence operation wouldn’t have gotten into that server, so this confirms my biases.

    6. Snopes, which is not always reliable but worth checking, says this is bogus.

      I have a hard time accepting that the NYPD is going to do anything seriously contra Clinton.

      On the other hand, Comey did say he was concerned about information about the investigation leaking out.

      Who knows?

  20. This was discussed a bit last night, but god damn, Hillary’s campaign commercials during the World Series were awful.

    One was basically “Dear God Won’t Someone Think of THE CHILDREN!,” showing various clips of Trump saying horrible things cut with shots of small kids watching television.

    The other “One Little Mistake” was basically, “Trump’s gonna get us nuked!”

    1. She is really f-ing desperate now.

    2. Well, Won’t Someone Think of THE CHILDREN!

      1. Florida hipster whispers, “Nooo”

      2. Well, Won’t Someone Think of THE CHILDREN!

        Anthony Weiner is.

      3. How do you think we got into such as fucked up state as a country? Those very words.

    3. Had a commercial break last night with four commercials: Those two, “Marco Rubio is a terrible Senator”, and “This local congressman doesn’t want to ban guns from people on an arbitrary government list!”

      I remembered why I never watch broadcast TV unless it’s sports.

      1. Only 2 political ads last night? Lucky you. Every other commercial around here is a political ad. ugh

        1. I was just talking about one commercial break. I don’t think I saw any non-political ads all night.

        2. Yeah same here. We have (basically) a toss-up Senate race and a toss-up Governor race. I’m starting to get sick of hearing how everyone sucks. I already know they suck, just tell me who’s not going to try to steal ALL of my rights.

    4. The one with Trump saying things about women was effective and well done. The other ones not so much.

  21. Chicago Hamburger Co. of Phoenix will give out 2016 free sliders in celebration of Cubs victory

    When you think about fans of the Chicago Cubs, there are those cheering throngs in Wrigley Field, the thousands packing streets and bars in Wrigleyville, or everyone displaying the W flag and rooting for them on via social media.

    There’s another big fan of the Cubs, only he’s in Phoenix. And, if the Cubs beat the Cleveland Indians to win Game 7, Bob Pappanduros will give out 2,016 sliders at his burger stand, the Chicago Hamburger Company, which sits north of Phoenix’s downtown.

    Pappanduros, who grew up near Chicago, has gotten to do this once before, in 2005, when the White Sox won the World Series. That year, he gave out free 2,005 sliders. And for the 27 years that he’s owned the restaurant, he’s made the same promise, if the Cubs took home the trophy.

    Given the Cubs’ long drought, it seemed like a promise that would be unfulfilled, until the past couple of years, when the team began to become a contender. And now, there is at least a 50-50 chance he’s going to have to fire up the grill.

    “I’m as happy as a Cubs fan can be, I suppose,” Pappanduros told me by email on Wednesday.

  22. The 80-Year-Old Runway Model Reshaping China’s Views on Aging

    etermined to avoid mental and physical stagnation, Mr. Wang has constantly explored new skills and ideas while devoting ample time to daily exercise. Last year, at 79, he walked the runway for the first time, his physique at his age causing a national sensation. He takes obvious joy in subverting China’s image of what it means to be old.

    And old age in China begins relatively early. The legal retirement age for women is 50 for workers and 55 for civil servants, and 60 for most men. Mr. Wang is having none of that.

    “One way to tell if you’re old or not is to ask yourself, Do you dare try something you’ve never done before?” he said in a recent interview at a Beijing hotel.

    “It’s about your state of mind. It’s not about age,” he said. “Nature determines age, but you determine your state of mind.”

    1. Crusty will be in his bunk.

    2. “He also drinks less alcohol now, he said, but that is about as far as his dietary restrictions go. “I am not picky at all about what I eat. I eat whatever I want to eat.””

      I bet that doesn’t include Little Debbie Snack Cakes, though.

    3. So, HGH and steroids?

      1. That or just genetics. And like was just posted, he’s probably not driving through McDonalds and eating 10,000 grams of sugar every day like most Americans do.

        1. *Looks up from 10 kilo bowl of sugar and bottle of Mountain Dew*

          “What?”

  23. Maybe we should think twice about polling millennials:

    “We are definitely seeing young people who don’t practice safe sex,” says Dr. Hansa Bhargava, a WebMD medical editor and pediatrician based in Atlanta. “In a casual relationship, if a person feels like they ‘know’ the other person, they are less likely to practice protected sex,” she says, referring to the “friends with benefits” phenomenon.
    A 2015 CDC study found that condom use among sexually active high schoolers dropped from 63 percent in 2003 to 57 percent in 2015. A study that same year by Skyn condoms found that 48 percent of millennials use condoms “never” or “rarely.”

  24. “I hate to put a little pressure on you, but the fate of the republic rests on your shoulders. The fate of the world is teetering.”
    -Block Insane Yomomma, speaking to North Carolina voters

    A little melodramatic there, mofo? The world survived eight years of Bush and almost eight years of your sorry ass. Somehow I think it will be still be around regardless of how the election goes.

    1. Even when you’re right, you can’t resist the siren song of the retarded nickname, can you.

      1. Hey we aren’t all rich enough to have beeswax to fill our ears with…

      2. It’s starting to grow on me.

        1. The “Yomamma” part is stupid, but it rhymes and is generally derogatory. The “Insane” part is the strongest part of the nickname. But “Block”?? It starts with a “B” and approximately rhymes, but it doesn’t convey an insult. Why not “Crock”?

          I mean, if you must.

          1. We should probably count our blessings that he didn’t go with “Black.”

        2. “Empathize with stupidity and you are halfway to thinking like an idiot.”

          -Iain M. Banks

    2. If the fate of the world depends on the American voter…………………..

    3. Praying for the Nine Billion Names of God. Or SMOD.

    1. She is definitely winning hearts and minds.

    2. I take the way they’re behaving and the over-the-top rhetoric as a sign that they think they’re in trouble.

      1. The movement of the polls would indicate that they are in trouble. They’d better get more dead people on the voter registrations.

        1. DOB 1867 seems a little suspicious.

    3. That’s the most sincere she’s sounded the whole campaign cycle. The one good thing about her being President is that someone on the alt-right might just troll her right into a stroke.

      1. When she’s off the cuff and allowed to let her true nature come out, it all connects.

        Except that it’s pure wickedness.

        How she polls at 47% when she probably even loathes her own supporters is beyond me.

        1. Those of you that didn’t vote for me, fuck you!

          Those of you that did vote for me, fuck you too!

        2. Because her supporters agree. She’s the mean girl and they like the feeling of being part of the cool kids clique, basically. Without changing a single aspect of your life you can immediately feel superior to people who aren’t like you just by agreeing with Hillary and the Progs about the deplorables.

    4. Hey, it’s the Clinton truthiness – she at least just admitted she was sick. And tired – but I’m assuming that’s just the old age and poor health.

      1. Hey, she ain’t in no ways tired!

    5. And she’s added this creepy finger pointing thing to her scolding of the plebes. Stronger Together! Except for you, and you, and that guy over there, and…

    6. It used to be that candidates would impugn the goodwill their opponents.

      Hillary is impugning the goodwill of a fairly large minority of Americans. I don’t think I’ve heard a presidential candidate do that. Not even George Wallace did that. There are some examples of politicians doing that in Germany, Russia, and China, but it is novel development in American politics.

      This is some serious and quite explicit “othering”.

      1. What about ‘bama’s “bitter clingers”?

        1. And it does make sense to be this divisive. She’s not going to attract Trump voters, but she’s going to attract undecideds by flattering their preconceptions of Trump voters.

  25. Word of the Day: Agender

    And when folks push for more conversations around thinness (and generally, a very specific type of thinness at that ? that of white, middle class, feminine, cisgender women) to happen, they’re further silencing the harder conversations we need to be having as a movement.

    Because if your feminism isn’t intersectional, then who the hell is it for?

    And the mainstream body acceptance movement has a long, long way to go to be inclusive of multiple marginalized bodies.

    Body acceptance activists are frequently criticized (and rightly so) for excluding non-binary or agender experiences. Any time that we talk about how “men and women” experience body image issues, or when we talk about body image issues being indicative of binary gender expectations, we leave out entire groups of people.

    The rest of it is the purest of derp. High grade, unadulterated, derp-heroine.

    1. Can we not post from Everyday Feminism? That kind of derp is triggering to me.

      1. Toughen up. Think of it as resilience training for our ever more progressive future.

        1. Do you spend a lot of time over there combing for the derpiest derp, or just log in grab the first article and re post. If you actually dig through multiple articles to find that, then I think you are probably doing irreversible damage to your brain. That is so derp it hurts.

          1. I don’t have to dig far at all. Admittedly, there’s not much effort involved. Cheap and easy score.

            1. Shit floats. The headline article is going to be the shittiest floater.

      2. I like how that much stupidity is concentrated into such a small space. It’s the septic bladder of the internet.

        1. Actually, I think of Everyday Feminism as the industrial waste of the equality process.

          Every process produces some, after all…

    2. Do Agender people live in Aleppo?

    3. thinness (and generally, a very specific type of thinness at that ? that of white, middle class, feminine, cisgender women)

      Is this like a thin vs thick libertarianism thinness, or the circumference of one’s wast thinness?

      1. Or like vile vs scoundrel vs nasty man?

      2. I think of it as a would/wouldn’t duality.

    4. When I first saw that word, I thought it was the way people from Boston say “agenda”

    5. …we leave out entire groups of people.

      Wait, lemme check. Men? Yep. Women? Yep. No, that’s everybody.

  26. Want to be more successful? Try thinking about death

    A new study on a group of basketball players has found they played better if they thought about death before taking to the court.

    “Basketball players”?! FTS!!

    1. Explains why old people are so successful.

  27. regarding that ABC poll

    Finally, it is worth recalling that the poll is one which actively oversamples democrats, and in the latest edition, of the sample of 1,167 likely voters, the partisan divisions were 37 for Democrats, 30 for Republicans and 29 for Independents, with the last group on the verge of surpassing the Republican group entirely.

    Does anyone know what the current partisan breakdown really is (too lazy too google it). I thought there was a big jump in independents lately.

    1. http://www.gallup.com/poll/153…..ation.aspx

      40% independents, 32% demos, 27% repubs…if you go by ‘leans one way’ it’s 49-44 demo to repub.

      1. My gut tells me that self-identified Independents are as accurate in their description/voting habits as are self-described “libertarians.”

        1. I’ve seen several studies (too lazy to google for them now) that show that independents vote the same way (percentage wise) as the people who live in their neighborhood

    2. I guess the real art is trying to project turnout, and using that to set your sampling. I do have a hard time believing that the Dems are going to exceed Rep turnout by that much (19% more Dems than Reps will vote? Seems unlikely).

  28. Too bad we don’t have a parliamentary system.

    Paul Ryan would be President.

    1. There would probably be a viable libertarian party that could influence policy on the margins as part of a coalition. Parliamentary systems have their flaws but I think I might prefer it. Never will happen here, though.

      1. Serious drawbacks. Ie we don’t get to vote on a party’s leader. Or if I like someone, there should be some way I can vote for them directly. As it stands, the way it works is whoever I choose in my riding is a vote for the party; not the candidate. It’s impossible to vote for a Liberals MP and a Conservative PM like we see in the U.S. where Americans can vote for the person. I hope I explained this right but this migraine…

        1. If only we could take the best of both, and then kick them to their own island to leave us alone.

        2. in the U.S. where Americans can vote for the person

          Wrong, twice. We vote for ‘electors’ in the Electoral College.

          And we vote AGAINST the person, except for a few who vote for the skin color or vag.

          1. That’s one way of looking at it. But you get the point.

        3. No, I get it. The biggest potential benefit in my eyes is that it makes easier for smaller parties/movements to have influence. Of course that can itself be a drawback.

          Perhaps a good compromise would be proportional representation in a legislative branch while still having a separate executive branch. I’m not sure how that would actually manifest itself in party structure, though.

          1. It’s very hard.

            And in recent years, most of the power has been concentrated more and more in the PMO. I’m not too crazy about MP’s acting as independent minds having to toe the party line. Interestingly, I’ve noticed the same development in the U.S. with the executive. Checks and balances are under duress.

            1. I’m certain voting in a lawless felon will solve our problems.

    2. Imagine ex-President Dennis Hastert.

      1. Hey, what’s this massage table doing in the Oval Office?

  29. I got a kick out of all of those pearl clutching ads where children were watching Donald Trump say in appropriate things on television considering the myriad things the Monica Lewinsky scandal and its subsequent coverage taught my ten year old self about oral sex, infidelity, dishonesty, and bangin’ fatties.

  30. James Burke, Ex-Suffolk County Police Chief, Is Sentenced to 46 Months

    CENTRAL ISLIP, N.Y. ? The once popular and swaggering chief of the Suffolk County Police Department, James Burke, was sentenced to 46 months in federal prison on Wednesday for a series of misdeeds that began after a duffel bag belonging to him was stolen from his parked sport utility vehicle.

    Mr. Burke’s efforts at a cover-up set in motion a scandal that reverberated through Long Island politics, making new enemies out of old allies and leading to an ever-widening inquiry by the Federal Bureau of Investigation that is now scrutinizing not only the police, but also prosecutors and the judiciary.

    It’s astonishing how corrupt this state is.

    1. Even more bonus: The Suffolk County District Attorney is probably the only person alive to have been rebuked by a court for violating the 13th Amendment.

    2. He’s a petty thug who’s been gifted authority. They should put him in solitary for a couple years.

    3. Are you sure that’s not the back blurb from a Tom Wolfe novel?

    1. Mask? What mask?

      I also like her in blood red, the color or all those who have underestimated her.

      1. How have Native Americans have underestimated her?

        1. How have Native Americans have underestimated her?

          Not Indians, silly, communists. She is a much more dedicated communist than they think. Even AmSoc and Tony think she has some libertarian leanings.

    2. good lord.

      1. 5. When she was down there talking to the police, fire, and ambulance people…

        …Donald Trump was in his tower plotting how he could capitalize on the tragedy.

        Or maybe she was exploiting the tragedy in order to get votes like every politician in history. No, never, not dear leader.

    3. after viewing this page I have become aware that the person who posted this picture’s name is Tommy Carcetti and he has a picture of Jimmy Carter as his avatar. There is no way that this is not a parody.

    4. onecent (4,318 posts)

      7. She got alot of people’s votes. She’s got mine too.

      /durrrr M.O.O.N that spells MOON.

      1. I thought M.O.O.N spelled Tom Cullen?

        1. It does, it does.

          M-O-O-N, that spells ‘does’.

  31. “A senior British court on Thursday dealt a severe blow to Prime Minister Theresa May’s plans…”

    Somewhere in Hell, Andrew Jackson is quietly chuckling.

  32. “accidentally” *dons tinfoil hat*

    Fighter jet accidentally drops training bombs on northern Michigan

    The training weapons were on a plane heading to Camp Grayling from Selfridge Air National Guard Base in suburban Detroit when they fell off. The Michigan National Guard says the bombs and missile were found in a remote wooded area near Luzerne.

    Lt. Col. Matthew Trumble, director of the Camp Grayling Air Gunnery Range, says it’s a “rare” situation.

    The Guard says the missile was non-explosive and the six training bombs can release smoke so that pilots can see where they land.

    1. + Michigan Militia

    2. Fighter jet accidentally drops training bombs on northern Michigan

      Somewhere, Woody Hayes is smiling and repeating: “When you put it in the air, 3 things can happen, and two of them are bad.”

      1. Nice. But he would be happy it happened in Michigan.

      2. You win the internet today. Go Bucks!

        Fuck Michigan!

    3. If they had been live bombs, the impact area would have been indistinguishable from Detroit.

    4. Damn. I wish they would have hit Camp Grayling…

      /grumbling at old Guard memories

  33. Filed under: I guess I’m really not surprised by this

    “Vladimir Putin signed an executive order according Russian citizenship to Steven Seagal,” announced the sober decree published on the Kremlin website on Thursday morning, among other items of national importance such as government reshuffles and international treaties.

    Obligatory

    1. Putin has Casey Ryback? Oh no…

      1. At least we’ve still got Chuck Norris.

      2. When he adds Nico Toscani and Forrest Taft too, Russia will be unimaginably dangerous

    2. Putin has a poster of Gino Felino in his room according to wikileaks.

      1. Anyone know why Richie did Bobby Lupo?

  34. How good of a job do you think Trump did vetting his electors?

    If he wins with low 270s, is there a state that would go rogue en masse and throw the election into the House?

    This was the exact purpose of the EC, to save the country from deranged voters.

    1. There was an assumption that “faction” should be encouraged so that the votes would generally lead to having multiple candidates with none of them having a majority and Congress picking the President. The popular vote would be sort of a straw poll, only a clearly widely more-popular choice would win the Presidency outright.

      To that end, the “big tent” philosophy of the GOP is clearly un-American when compared to the “identity politics” of the Dems. The “divide and conquer” strategy of pitting one group against another seems somehow “wrong”, but you set a gang of thieves fighting amongst themselves and they’re too busy trying to screw each other over to screw you.

      There’s really no “ironic” or “karma” or “sweet salty prog tears” about it to see the feminists fighting with the gays fighting with the blacks fighting with the greens fighting with the whatevers – it’s how the system is supposed to (not) work and trying to unite these disparate groups is the work of the Devil. You really want to encourage division within the electorate rather than urging some sort of common cause unity. The People united isn’t a coalition – it’s a mob.

    1. Seriously, how is it that this doesn’t make the cut?

      1. It doesn’t trouble you that partisan FBI agents are doing their best to flip an election by leaking bullshit stories one after another?

        1. Everything about this election has been troubling.

          1. It bothers me almost as much as the fact that Hillary is not already indicted, tried, and sentenced to a well-deserved prison term … along with her husband.

            1. I’m pretty sure that last part would violate the Eighth Amendment.

              1. Naw. Bill is up to his testicles in influence peddling/bribery and money laundering. A comprehensive indictment would definitely include him.

                1. I was riffing on their being incarcerated together. I mean it’s moral, maybe even cosmic justice, but our penal system has standards.

                  1. I think the FBI has damaged what chances they had of seeing the Clinton indicted after leaking these stories on the eve of an election. They’re turned a criminal matter into an overtly political question and the verdict will be determined by the election.

                    1. It was never intended to land a conviction. It was intended to shore up Comey’s sinking reputation and play-pretend that the Bureau isn’t in fact a political tool. This ends in a few weeks with Comey once again magnanimously declining to recommend charges.

                    2. They’re turned a criminal matter into an overtly political question

                      See, I thought Lynch meeting with Bill Clinton in secret, and then publicly abrogating her duty to decide whether to indict, is what made it overtly political.

            2. Hillary’s “email crimes” just don’t excite me the way they seem light you up. The solicitation of money for charity in return for government action is more interesting to me, but even these allegations seem overstated when one considers the ordinary practice of giving money directly to politicians in the form of campaign in return economic and political favors. The Clintons were soliciting money for charity but all politicians solicit money for political advancement. The asshole Sheldon Adelson bribes Republicans to keep his casino empire in tact and he pays them to keep the drug war rolling. Tell me how that’s different?

              1. Hillary’s email crimes as they relate to classified information light me up because, if I did 1/100th of what she did just in the mishandling of information I’d be facing years in jail and 6 digit fines. On top of a long, expensive court case assuming I just didn’t plead guilty. This is ignoring the whole “running government business through an unauthorized information system to avoid FOIA laws”.

                Honestly, Hillary could be the most competent, successful technocrat around and have policies that line up with mine perfectly I still wouldn’t vote for her because she committed a crime that has fried people I know, got away with it, and shows zero remorse or even acknowledging what she did was stupid or wrong.

              2. The asshole Sheldon Adelson bribes Republicans to keep his casino empire in tact and he pays them to keep the drug war rolling. Tell me how that’s different?

                It’s not. People here decry crony capitalism all the time. Furthermore, if you can show where a Republican President gave arms deals to countries in exchange for multi-million-dollar donations to his family’s private charity, you might actually have a case.

                So stop fucking defending Hillary.

        2. partisan FBI agents

          Yeah, because it’s not like they’ve ever hammered people for committing 10% of the shit Hillary and her cronies pulled.

          Maybe Comey should have recommended indictment back in July and he wouldn’t be dealing with an insurgency in his own department.

      2. “Sources” “believe” “moving toward” “likely”. That’s a lot of weasel words.

        My sources tell me “Clinton” is the only important word in that headline. Sure, sooner or later the champ gets a little older and a little slower and a little weaker enough that he loses his title but it’s usually only in hindsight that it becomes obvious he was fighting a battle he wasn’t going to win. Until then, the smart money is on the champ to win again and the Clintons are the reigning heavyweight champs of dodging bullets. I wouldn’t bet on this bullet being the one to find its mark.

        1. Can’t disagree with this observation.

        2. Half the battle is controlling the narrative. The “classified documents” issue is the red cape to distract from the real issue – it’s not that she was sending e-mail on an unsecured private server, it’s who she was sending it to and for what purpose and for what price. Just like the “Bill can’t keep his dick in his pants” issue was a distraction from the real issue that he committed perjury. It wasn’t a “Monica Lewinsky” scandal, it was a “Paula Jones” scandal. It’s not a “e-mail server” scandal, it’s a “taking foreign bribes” scandal. But as long as Hillary keeps defending herself on the classified-information-on-a-private-server issue, that’s what gets attention.

          And you’re never going to find a smoking gun – there was never a “give me a million dollars and I’ll make sure the arms deal goes your way” sort of thing. Everybody knows how the nod-and-a-wink game gets played. I make a donation to express how deeply I care about the starving orphans, you agree to have a private chat with me so we can discuss just how deeply I care about starving orphans – and any other little issues I might care deeply about. How deeply do I care? Well, we can probably quantitize that in the form of dollars and cents, can’t we. And then Hillary can express her gratitude for my caring by sending some little token of appreciation my way. Because we’re all just partners in sharing and caring, not because there’s anything untoward going on here, oh, heavens, no.

    2. The official Reason talking point appears to be that Comey is a bad person for essentially informing America in no uncertain terms that if we elect Hillary, we’re electing a lying criminal.

      For some odd reason, I suspect their real beef with Comey is that he has given Trump a chance to win. Call me crazy if you want, but I have a weird feeling that if it was reversed and Trump was the guy under federal criminal investigation every other thread here would be talking about it and how it was proof that he’s unfit to be president.

      1. Are you referring to Napolitano’s column? The syndicated column they run that only an idiot would refer to as an “official Reason talking point”?

        1. Plus that article didn’t have a single question mark outside of a literary quote. It wasn’t even written by the REAL Judge, just some doppelganger that’s clearly taken his place.

      2. Trump is under federal investigation.

        1. ROFL.

          1. Dismiss it but you’re wrong. He’s being audited which is an investigation.

            1. Dismiss it but you’re wrong. He’s being audited which is an investigation.

              Autist spotted.

            2. No, it isn’t. An audit may lead to an investigation if flagrant violations are identified, but it isn’t one on its own.

      3. “The official Reason talking point appears to be that Comey is a bad person for essentially informing America in no uncertain terms that if we elect Hillary, we’re electing a lying criminal.

        That’s factually incorrect. If you can be more honest than that about what other people say, then you should try harder.

        What Napolitano said was that what Comey did was outside the rule of law.

        If Napolitano sides with the rule of law even when doing so has consequences he doesn’t necessarily like, then that makes him an honest champion of liberty and justice.

        Yeah, being an honest champion of liberty and justice means sometimes you have to stand up for the Fourth Amendment rights of child molesters, the Eighth Amendment rights of terrorists, the Fifth Amendment rights of rapists, the First Amendment rights of Nazis, etc., and if the rule of law requires Comey to do things that might help Hillary hide her disgusting behavior, then that’s part of it, too.

        Napolitano is as against Hillary’s disgusting behavior as the next guy, he’s just more committed to liberty and justice than you are.

        1. If Napolitano sides with the rule of law even when doing so has consequences he doesn’t necessarily like, then that makes him an honest champion of liberty and justice.

          We’ve already got a situation where the Dem candidate is operating far outside the rule of law, and has done so with impunity because she was getting top cover from Obama and Lynch. That’s nice and all that Judge Nap is wanting to hold Comey to that same standard, but he’s missing the forest for the trees–those institutions are already thoroughly corrupted and so the actors are going to operate in a manner that reflects how deep the corruption lies.

        2. What Napolitano said was that what Comey did was outside the rule of law.

          I disagree with him on that. It wasn’t a violation of any law, so definitely not “outside the rule of law” in that sense.

          He did it because he promised Congress that he would keep them up to date on events. I fail to see how that is contrary to the rule of law.

          If you want to read “rule of law” to mean “law enforcement should never do anything that might affect an election”, I think you’ve got it backwards as to what rule of law requires. But, even under that definition, withholding or releasing information during a campaign both affect the election. Comey was trapped under that definition.

    3. That’s just a spin on news that’s being reported elsewhere.

      Yeah, the FBI and the Justice Department were at war with each other over how far to pursue the Clinton Foundation.

      Meanwhile, the FBI isn’t responsible for indicting anybody. The FBI is under the supervision of the Justice Department.

      The Attorney General is in charge of the Justice Department, and the Attorney General decides whether to charge people–and whether to call a grand jury to indict people.

      The FBI wanted a grand jury to go after the Clinton Foundation, but there was no way that was ever going to happen for a couple of reasons.

      The actual facts of the case are that the FBI wanted an indictment, but the Justice Department, whose job it is to indict people, refused to do so. As Napolitano wrote in another post today, Comey making the determination that Hillary shouldn’t be indicted back in July was a farce–because he has no power to make any such determination. It was all for show to save Loretta Lynch from embarrassment for refusing to empanel a grand jury.

      I repeat: The FBI has no power to indict anybody. And the Justice Department will never indict anyone at the Clinton Foundation so long as Lynch is the Attorney General and Obama or Hillary is President.

      You have to read Fox News with a critical eye. Half of what they write is horseshit.

      1. I would argue that if the evidence shows that someone is a likely criminal who should be indicted, but the administration is acting all Nixonian and refusing to do so for purely political reasons, then the FBI is more than justified in going public and letting the country know exactly what’s going on.

        What Comey is doing is really not much different than Mark Felt leaking the evidence of the crimes of Richard Nixon and his staff to Woodward and Bernstein. In fact, I think you could argue that Comey has more guts than Felt did, because Felt hid what he did for decades, whereas Comey is doing it out in the open.

        I like Judge Napolitano a lot and usually agree with him, but he’s simply wrong on this one. Hillary Clinton is no ordinary citizen, and these are pretty extraordinary circumstances that we’ve very rarely been in before.

        1. “I would argue that if the evidence shows that someone is a likely criminal who should be indicted, but the administration is acting all Nixonian and refusing to do so for purely political reasons, then the FBI is more than justified in going public and letting the country know exactly what’s going on.”

          He could have done that by resigning in protest when the Department of Justice refused to empanel a grand jury.

          1. That’s what happened during the Saturday Night Massacre.

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ Saturday_Night_Massacre

            Only it was the Attorney General that resigned in protest.

            1. Obama would never appoint a Special Prosecutor to look into this matter, and Elliot Richardson and William Ruckelshaus definitely had way more integrity than Loretta Lynch ever would in her lifetime.

              Yes, Comey could have resigned in protest, and perhaps he should have. Mark Felt could also have gone public as a whistleblower and/or publicly resigned his position as well back in the day. But they didn’t want to. Maybe they felt it wasn’t the best possible way to get the truth out? Who knows.

              1. IIRC, in Felt’s case it was a Machiavellian attempt to land the job of head man at the FBI.

                It didn’t work out as he had hoped.

                1. Neither Felt nor Comey are purely 100% virtuous. But the country would most certainly have been better off with a man like Felt at the top spot than Hoover!

                  At these levels, when you know for a fact that your superiors belong in prison more than they belong in the White House, it’s a really tough spot to be in, and I tend to sympathize with these folks. Generally speaking, this society and culture is not particularly kind to whistleblowers. If all they lose is their career, they’re lucky.

              2. Just a reminder that after Richardson and Ruckelshaus stood up for principle, Robert Bork agreed to sign the later in exchange for Supreme Court nomination.

                Fuck Robert Bork.

                1. Robert Bork agreed to sign the later in exchange for Supreme Court nomination.

                  Citation needed.

    1. “Her story is nuanced and complex, and in the process of telling it, she forces us to consider race in an entirely new light?not as a biological imperative, but as a function of the experiences we have, the culture we embrace, and, ultimately, the identity we choose.”

      1. forces us to consider race in an entirely new light?not as a biological imperative, but as a function of the experiences we have, the culture we embrace, and, ultimately, the identity we choose.

        If only that were true. If only enough people confronted the fact that “race”, as the term is used by the Left, doesn’t mean what you think it means. “Race”, as the term is generally understood, is a fucking biological imperative and that’s all it is. Just like “gender”. “Experience” and “culture” and “identity” have fuck-all to do with it. You’re Humpty-Dumpty-izing the language to intentionally obscure what you’re really driving at when the whole purpose of language is to clarify what you mean. That’s what people should be forced to consider about “race” – they’re being brainwashed into believing that words can mean whatever anybody chooses to make them mean. The whole crowning achievement of Humanity – the ability to express abstract thought – is being raped to death in the back alleys of leftism and you’d damn well better wake up to that fact and put a stop to it.

        1. ^^^This

        2. It really comes down to power and control, as Orwell spoke of in 1984. If you control the language, you control the thoughts that can be expressed, and of what use are thoughts that cannot be expresssed? Rachel Dolezal is not a black woman, she’s not a black man, she’s not three black men. Words have meanings. If you can call yourself black merely because you “feel” black, a woman merely because you “feel” like a woman, a trio just because you “feel” like you’re three people, what the hell’s the difference between “a white woman” and “three black men”? How do you express the difference between those two phrases if “a” can mean “three” and “white” can mean “black” and “man” can mean “woman” and any of those words can mean anything whatsoever if somebody so chooses? You can’t.

          And that’s the point – it’s not enough that when Rachel Dolezal says she’s a black woman you just shrug and say “well, it’s a free country and if that white woman wants to claim she’s a black woman just because she feels like she’s a black woman that’s none of my business”. No, you have to agree with her that she is in fact a black woman. And not some fake “well, I’ll say I agree just to keep myself from getting beat to death even though I don’t agree” – you will agree because there are no longer any words with which to express the idea of disagreement. That’s the end game here – not to control what you’re allowed to say, but to control what you’re capable of saying.

          1. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

            THIS

        3. For the record, my second comment was a quote from the publisher’s description of the book.

          I think she should be going to a shrink, not on a book signing tour. Jerryskids said everything I was thinking, just way better than I could have.

        4. the ability to express abstract thought – is being raped to death in the back alleys of leftism

          Writes the person who also wrote:

          You’re Humpty-Dumpty-izing the language to intentionally obscure what you’re really driving at when the whole purpose of language is to clarify what you mean.

          1. To be clear myself, I agree with the sentiment, but the words are a bit much.

            That’s the end game here – not to control what you’re allowed to say, but to control what you’re capable of saying

            Indeed!

        5. Thanks, Jerry. You have summarized why it pisses me off so much that people are so casual about what words actually fucking mean.

  35. College foobal, college lacrosse, nhl, nfl.

  36. I live in a world where the cubs win AND who wins president doesn’t matter because of constitutional limits on executive power…

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