Election 2016

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  1. I’m glad you have an RSS feed.

    Does the Fifth Column have one?

    1. I think you’ve asked this for months with no answer

      It’s becoming a funny meme. I should start demanding that Ugh OMG Ugh Trump-Groping stories have their own separate RSS feed

      1. I don’t want to have to sign up for ItUnes or Google’s service or any of the cloud-based stuff to download a podcast.

        1. I feel you. I use SparseRss on my phones. Its the bomb. But Ive never used it w/ outlook, the way some olderschool people seem to.

          1. I’m making over $16k a month working part time. I kept hearing other people tell me how much money they can make online so I decided to look into it. Well, it was all true and has totally changed my life…Go to this web site and click tech tab to start your work… http://tinyurl.com/j4onneg

  2. If it’s free, that just tells me that no one would buy it.

  3. If it is as fun as the comment only board, then I think I’ll get the app for my iPhone thingy that I only use for work. =D

  4. Matthew . I can see what your saying… Bobby `s storry is surprising, last saturday I got a brand new Land Rover Defender since I been making $4556 this past 5 weeks and more than ten-grand this past-month . this is definitely my favourite-job I have ever had . I began this 4 months ago and immediately made more than $71 per-hr . More Info
    ????????> http://www.factoryofincome.com

  5. Brooks sold records, and probably still does, from his musty long basement in Toledo.
    Millions of angelic utterances alongside more than a few persistent souls likely ghosts today playing background noise giggles on fucking memes on the goddamn imitation millennial digitalis.
    Expression innovators who belted lone dreams under rainy memories next to rusty car dealerships before time went above 2k caught in walls of boxes chocked with magic ebony spinning slices of voice rivers.
    Who the fuck knows anymore?
    Time is a goddamn chore to slow enough to ponder this shit.
    Fucking pretentious to cream shit from my fingertips in a fashion such as this. I know…
    But Brooks did sell fucking records and the best records of the ghosts who will sing forever on the echos of
    modern memories and switch backs and hair pins on the curves of times both then and now.

  6. Time is used and imagined
    today and tomorrow and yesterday
    she looks back on her lovers
    while sifting fingers through the rainbows glistening
    on the jogging rivers of now while thinking of
    spaceships flitting betwixt the turgid streaming
    demands of fucking long tomorrows sweating
    stars from chasing
    doorways out of the universe.

  7. Our lives are spent on the dreams of offspring
    and the mad inventions of governing fakeries
    We exist to shine the collapsing shoes of our own atoms
    Working hard to exemplify the most magnificent corpse
    under the leering luncheons of our compadres in the
    universe of our tasks

  8. Joe ran off the roof in 1987
    and I tried so fucking hard to stop him
    but he was horribly abused by his awkward
    sasquatch of a father who ran a junkyard
    and worked at Jeep but Joe’s dad
    killed himself and I was strangely sad.

    Joe ran off the roof and sprained his ankle
    and broke out the glass of entire window.
    I ran down the stairs with peeling wallpaper
    and out the fucking odd doors of my youth
    and consoled Joe on the front lawn of sparse
    grass of western avenue in front of the red marbled
    high school they tore down.

  9. When MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough asked him in December if his admiration of Russian President Vladimir Putin was at all tempered by the country’s history of critical journalists being murdered, his response was: “He’s running his country, and at least he’s a leader, unlike what we have in this country… Well, I think that our country does plenty of killing, too.”

    Through his words and actions, Trump has consistently demonstrated a contempt for the role of the press beyond offering publicity to him and advancing his interests.

    For this reason CPJ is taking the unprecedented step of speaking out now. This is not about picking sides in an election. This is recognizing that a Trump presidency represents a threat to press freedom unknown in modern history.

    Help me out here, how is expressing admiration for the leader of a country where journalists are killed for criticizing the government worse than actually killing journalists? And how far out of your goddamn mind do you have to be to believe that China, Cuba, Iran, half the third-world countries on the planet aren’t a worse threat to a free press than Trump or that anybody can seriously believe Trump is a threat “unknown in modern history”? This is the exact sort of shit that makes people want to spit in your face when they hear you call yourself a “journalist” you lying scumbag.

    1. Donald fucking Trump is the strangest way to save liberty because the motherfucker is likely antagonistic to my eagle wings but American socialists who have invaded all the emerging young minds and injected their poison into this thing are voices of hellish chains screaming to attach their ideas forcefully into the realms of my reality and if they deny this I have a simple solution:
      run free and proclaim that
      you LOVE AMERICA and ITS FREEDOM IDEALS AND YOU EMBRACE THE MOTHERFUCKING CONSTITUTION IN TOTAL!!

      Truth tryst. American socialism is epic emptiness and turgid fail. WHY? They are form the basis of globalism that HATES the COWBOY SPACE AMERICAN.

      THE world HATES US. Because AMERICA was the base for liberty. I apologize for my Indian brothers and sisters and I FUCKING hate that this country has not made the American Indian as majestic as they deserve and Republicans and Democrats are vile hellacious fucks for erasing the power spirits of this nation.

      1. GO AC GO!

      2. College kids should kill other college kids because of a flag? Use the constitution as TP in that case.

    2. I wonder if there is any mention there about Hillary’s promise to destroy journalists or their organizations that ‘have no right to exist’?

    3. Somehow, the prospect of journalists getting killed doesn’t upset me anywhere near as much as most journalists seem to think it should.

    4. Maybe they shouldn’t be actively working for the woman who thinks the 1st amendment is an impediment to her rule.

  10. the rims of sentences form the madness pathways
    we all prefer to pretend that do not exist
    consuming literature and visual productions hook the
    consciousness realms of woman and man
    the secret of this jungle of civilization is that
    between the real and the fucking fake
    exists the blurry Supra Real Code that forms the
    basis of how you must exist to be employed
    or loved or accepted or vote…

    This gulf of manufactured superficiality remains the mother
    of emerging and modern societies. This superficial stone is the
    strange gauge of all humanity and it is the fucking most empty
    nothingness that has been handed the keys to the already slim
    small universe of humanity…

    this is the arena where humans of all inertias and slices are played and deployed.
    The gulf of manufactured superficiality is why society is not real. Pompous society
    forms its cadres of condos and streets under the waving maples in all the cities
    where fucking distracted everyday minds converge in the breakfast shops and coffee huts
    and under the shadows of the mountains and goddamn sativa shit seems real but it
    is not- man, I promise you…

    the gulf of manufactured superficiality remains as the field where normality is managed
    and battled on the armies of writers and journalists and scribes and purchases payload
    ghasts chittering their volumes into this shivering thick thing that purchases the brains of a nation

    1. This is beast, brother. J Free Trap Pirate kicked some wings on the fucking waves where time got fucking lost.

      1. There’s a new day rising brother.

    1. J Trap Pi switched the drams on the parallels where not even the tips can press
      and when the fucking walls are dripping like these things are now you cannot actually
      walk through that shit even though your mind perceives reality melting like a vats of
      blueness grins wrinkling the dream fantasies of acid aliens…. if you ride a ship into agiles mind
      J Trap Pirate can sell your lovely self a ticket but J Trap Pirate cannot sell you
      an escape ticket because nothing about reality is about buying escapes
      drugs are escapes on the reward of odd noises clashing against the clavicles
      but please do not overdose as i have… though odd noises and skin galaxies
      are something almost no one will ever experience because that shit requires
      a whole new level of fucking reality

  11. Also burn it all down. The very idea of government as a social institution just holds human potential back.

    No God’s

    No Masters.

    Burn it all down.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfrAf1a9Qhs

  12. Reason the gentle glance across the snow swept plain under moon beams
    Reason the frantic struggle of boy fighting sobs
    watching his 7th grade icon artist from Laos go down under a beating
    in front of the penny candy store and oddly reacting in thick mud to
    protect Phay and this fucking melting time pie
    Reason the lines of lines of goddamn middle fingers to the falling islands of Babylons crumbling around
    Reason the alley of cats killing alligators
    Reason the gliding spirits spreading mental astuteness onto the wandering fumblers of state governing trampers.
    Reason the belted knowing pirate way with the fucking eye patch holing up a fucking ship melting laser
    Reason the tunnel of my misgivings, drug overdoses, and fungus magicians
    Reason the undertow of time lost behind the magic of tomorrows
    Reason the intermission of scribes prancing on the moons of emerging fantasies
    Reason the nest of enb
    Reason the trapdoor of stirrings gathering around plots in a tight kitchen with unnerving wallpaper
    Reason the objection to obtuse ethics of powerful cliffs that surround our playtimes
    Reason the pudding on the planets
    Reason the poltergeist of electricity of scribes
    Reason the basement of hellhounds, monsters, glocks, ghosts, angels, tornados, demons, living scurrilous curiosities otherwise known as the modern carnival of super gods and goddesses called Agile Cyborgs friends and if anyone fucks with my bitches I will karate chop their skulls.

    1. We love you too AC.

  13. You know who else let you listen to him for free?

    1. My neighbor’s dog that barks all damned night long?

      1. That’s why God invented subsonic 22s

    2. Eddie, who won’t shut up about his papism?

  14. I will wear my deplorable accusation like a badge, across my neck.

    I am an Anarchist.

    I am an Agorist.

    I am a Libertarian.

    I don’t care anymore.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6PNc9KN50M

    1. Your lyrics are better than the Sex Pistols version.

  15. I just played a pretty good game with the black pieces against a slightly stronger opponent. Here, let me share it with you guys.

    It was a risky opening I played, and it did cost me a pawn early. I pitched a second pawn (16…Rb8) to get my counterattack going faster. Now, although he’s two pawns up, white’s problem is that he’s well behind in development – but instead of simply allowing me to recapture the pawn on c4, he decided to defend it with 18 Ng3. So 18…Bxf1 is seemingly forced, and yes, white wants piece trades – but there’s no way to recapture on f1 that will clear some space for his king to get to safety.

    19…Qc8 was such an innocent-looking move. White must have seen it as some sort of subtle elaborate scheme to eventually get the queen onto f5 followed by …Rb1+, Rxb1…Qxb1+. In a variation like that, the queen could potentially be dangerous. White obviously didn’t give his own queen a second thought. Why would he? The entire a-file has been at his disposal ever since his queen landed there, as is the b7 square should retreat be necessary. Well, 19…Qc8 takes away b7 as a retreat square, so alarm bells should be going off.

    20 Ne4?? It’s hard to see what he saw in that move. Even if it doesn’t lose right away, it doesn’t seem to have any kind of a point. Anyway, after 20…Rb8, the white queen was trapped, and he resigned six moves later.

    1. I won too, only because my opponent blundered and allowed me to Atari a bunch of his stones.

      1. Well I lost, because I hit too many blots and fell for the classic back game strategy.

    2. This seems like an awfully elaborate euphemism…..

  16. AC has amazing poetry, whetherlurking in a tree, out on a stormy sea, or sitting next to me. He’s so good he can even drop an epitaph while he takes a pee. I hope one can see, he brought reason to you and me, cause…..if he wasn’t here, you’d probably be watching reruns of glee.

    He is the only one who could even bite me, but never would fight, spite, slight, or run away screaming in flight from thee.

  17. Does anyone else think that “could care less” is unfairly maligned? It’s like saying that not only are you indifferent but you can’t even decide whether or not there is any less you could care.

    1. I think the proper expression is ‘could not care less’. It is common to mangle that, as common as screwing up ‘give the benefit of doubt’ with ‘give the benefit of THE doubt’. The doubt? Really? Which one is that?

      1. We had a Laotian line superintendent who had some real zingers

        – Some other bitch (Son of a bitch)
        – Where we go (There you go)
        – Up theres (upstairs)

        When he was asked when something would be done, he usually responded “Tuesday!” He also said that when he wasn’t sure what you asked but thought it was about production.

        1. I have been around people from other cultures and especially other cultures whose native language is different who were full of hilarious misinterpretations of common American expressions and malaprops. It is very hard to resist laughing when someone is being very serious and everyone around them is turning beet red in the face and/or shooting coffee out of their nose.

          My problem is that, like jokes, I can never remember them to use on other people later.

          One cultural quirk that made an impression on me was from a Peruvian. She was fascinated with the word ‘bullshit’ and how I would spread it around very generously. After she understood what it meant she labeled me as far too cynical. She claimed they do not have an equivalent word or even the concept of ‘bullshit’. Of course after having so many examples pointed out to her she realized the world is chock full of bullshit and the cynicism rubbed off on her. I think she was mad at me for destroying the fantasy world she was living in.

          Just let that sink in and what it means about their culture.

          1. Hold your arms out in front of you, forearms perpendicular to your body, with one on top of the other. Do the horns with one hand. With the other hand, splay your fingers repeatedly.

            That’s bullshit.

          2. I have become Suthenboy, destroyer of worlds.

      2. Also, gilding the lily. Sure it’s a misquote but it’s a really good one.

      3. “Take the good with the bad ” is often heard.
        It should be I just have to take “the bad with the good”, because the good is what is desired and the bad is undesired. Although for some the bad may be desired.

      4. THE doubt is like THE Ohio State University.

      5. Which one is correct ? I looked it up but I only found “benefit of the doubt” and never “benefit of doubt” .However you seem to imply that the latter is correct.

        Ps : I am not a native English speaker.

        1. Ok, I found this. The correct idiom is in fact “benefit of the doubt”.

          1. If you enumerate a specific doubt, then sure.

            “We aren’t certain he was present when the crime was committed so we should give him the benefit of that doubt.”

            If you know someone is of good character or not sure they are of bad character then you might be tempted to give them the benefit of doubt in general; ‘the benefit of doubt’.

            Never mind asking the guy with a Phd in Linguistics that hangs around here sometimes, I am the final word on these things.

            *Read this comment with a strong southern accent because I come from a part of the country famous for its linguistic…eccentricities.

        1. David Mitchell is a national treasure. Not our nation’s, but someone’s.

    2. “I could care less” might be confused with “I couldn’t care less” but I use the first term deliberately – I could care less, but I’d have to make an effort to do so and I don’t care enough to make the effort – just exactly as you suggest.

      1. Sort of how hate isn’t the opposite of love, the opposite of love is indifference. Hating someone is still caring about them. I hate Tom Brady. I’m indifferent about Carson Palmer. I couldn’t care less about Carson Palmer getting hit by a bus, I could care less about Tom Brady getting eaten by a pack of wolverines.

        1. “I HATE YOU.”

          “I’m… I’m so flattered!”

    3. Does anyone else think that “could care less” is unfairly maligned?

      No – it is an abomination.

      1. Yes, but not nearly as awful as the misuse of apostrophes, or – god forbid – the use of “loose” for “lose”, which imo should be grounds for immediate death sentence

        1. Since I teach early American history, in their papers students frequently refer to colonists, or rather, colonist.

          As in “the colonist’s ships” or “the colonist’s approach to warfare” etc. And, bizarrely, some of them even manage to use the singular even without the apostrophe, e.g. “the colonist landed in Massachusetts.”

          I now include it in my list of writing errors as one of the worst mistakes they can make which will attract my ire.

          1. I teach early American history,

            I have a copy of “History of the United States in Words of One Syllable” (1880-something) floating around somewhere

            Its pretty funny (indians & slaves are “Red Men, Black Folk”), but also interesting in the level of detail applied to things we now skip past. In 1880, the early 1800s were still pretty fresh in mind, particularly anything that had helped lead to the civil war.

            I have always thought it would make a great resource for teachers, particularly to show students how history changes over time, and how perspective becomes distorted. Was the past “more true”? or are we fooling ourselves into thinking we’re any different now in how we frame the past?

            anyway, worth the ~$20 if you can find a copy

            1. Thanks for the rec!

        2. My bugaboo is the whole pronoun-antecedent thing. I think a lot of young people have adopted the convention to avoid gendering a person, but it’s lazy writing and lazier thinking.

  18. “attractive libertarian perspective ”

    Hahaha! It really is a humor magazine!

  19. . . . as Free and Fun as Found Money!

    Found money comes with a tax liability you know.

      1. Columbia University coeds hardest hit.

  20. Developments in the way media covers Obama’s FP debacles –

    in the last 2 months the NYT has run editorials about the continued (long ignored by NYT) failure of Afghanistan, the recent “Hey Look People Are Shooting Missiles at Our Navy; Gee That’s Odd – Were they *mad* we were helping bomb them?”-in-Yemen, as well as of the complete implosion of the Iran deal (*which they also ran cover for over the last 2 years)

    Still – they dont ever bother to ask “Why” these policies exist in the first place – they just note that they dont often meet the minimum expectations of their own creators

    Latest example – Hey We Never Really Mentioned It Before Even Though Its Been Going On For Years…. But Did You Know We’ve Totally Had Hundreds of People Running a Small War in Somalia? Yeah, That’s a Thing. Give Us Our Pulitzer Now.

    In its public announcements, the Pentagon sometimes characterizes the operations as “self-defense strikes,” though some analysts have said this rationale has become a self-fulfilling prophecy. It is only because American forces are now being deployed on the front lines in Somalia that they face imminent threats from the Shabab.

    LOOK WHAT YOU MADE US DO!!

    I know, not as interesting as pussy-grab-gab

    1. It’s all BOOOOOOOOOOSH’s fault.

      1. At an old Russian fighter jet base in Baledogle, about 70 miles from the Somali capital, Mogadishu, American Marines and private contractors are working to build up a Somali military unit designed to combat the Shabab throughout the country.

        Soldiers for the military unit, called Danab, which means lightning in Somali, are recruited by employees of Bancroft Global Development, a Washington-based company that for years has worked with the State Department to train African Union troops and embed with them on military operations inside Somalia.

        I am guessing comparisons to Blackwater are not going to be forthcoming. See, its different now.

        Mr. Stock said the goal was to create a small Somali military unit capable of battling the Shabab without repeating the mistakes in Afghanistan and Iraq, where the United States spent hundreds of millions of dollars trying to build up large armies.

        Maybe not blackwater then. Perhaps the right comparison is Ronald Reagans use of green berets to train “death squads ” in El Salvador. No? I feel like the Leftist Outrage is strangely missing from the characterization of the US mission here.

        1. And to be clear –

          My objection to this shit isnt the nature of what they’re doing, necessarily.

          What i object to is the way these same outlets spewed thousands of words of righteous indignation over these selfsame kinds of policies only a few years ago, and wrote feeling editorials about the Morality of the US War on Terror, and how our “Standing in the World” was so horribly diminished, and how Smart Power was needed to rectify the sins of the… HEY LOOK OVER THERE!! (cue 8 years of the same exact fucking policies, which they buried deep and only then with the requisite Ben Rhodesesque spin applied)

          1. If I recall there was an email from Bill Somethingorother to John Podesta, the one where he referred to a conspiracy to create an unaware and compliant citizenry, where he also referred to elected officials of the desirable sort ‘defaulting to policy’ after campaign rhetoric was no longer needed.

            Of course it has been the same old shit. They are all reading the same playbook. This is why they are shitting their pants over Trump.

        2. Reporters should report without inserting their comments, etc. Journalists can opine. What I object to is the one-sided reporting with some general or pentagon flunky being quoted without seeking out a second or third opposing view to counterbalance the claim being made.

          1. What I object to is the one-sided reporting with some general or pentagon flunky being quoted

            Yeah, there’s been lots of that too. Whenever they want to “confirm” the spin sent out from the admin, they go to some un-named pentagon source to get some reworded version of the same.

            Not much interest in getting comments from the Somalis being “accidentally” blown-up on occasion, or from the Human Rights/Code Pink/Lefty-Think-Tanker groups that were so frequently cited during the Blood-Reign of Booosh

        3. “…recruited by employees of Bancroft Global Development, a Washington-based company that for years has worked with the State Department…”

          Really? I smell a can of worms about the size of an olympic swimming pool and the lid is ajar. I bet Hillary has her asshole biting chunks out of her $10,000 pantsuit.

          1. I smell a can of worms

            Speaking of unique idioms…

          2. And look — Not only do they help intervene and destabilize governments – they help investors reap rewards from when they’ve installed new puppet regimes!

            Armed conflict is an exceptionally potent inhibitor of legitimate commerce. Yet no other economic obstacle can abate as quickly and completely, and investments in markets emerging from pervasive violence have generated outsized returns. Although in recent years many investors have begun to engage on the periphery of violence-prone frontier economies, they do so inexpertly.

            By contrast, Bancroft Global Investments relies on intimate local knowledge to identify and execute investments. Valuing depth over breadth, Bancroft utilizes long-term relationships to calculate actual risk, eschewing unaccountable third party evaluations in any part of the process, especially due diligence.

            HURR DURR DICK CHENEY HAL’BURTON CAPITALIST NEOCON HEGEMONEY HURR DURR

    2. Obama can do nothing wrong viz-a-viz FP. He’s got a goddamn Nobel Peace Prize!!11!!

  21. I’m using it now and it’s awesome! I’ve signed up for my account and have been bringing in fat paychecks. For real, my first week I made $306 and the second week I doubled it and then it kind a snowballed to $120 a day! just follow the course.. they will help you out.

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  22. I’m using it now and it’s awesome! I’ve signed up for my account and have been bringing in fat paychecks. For real, my first week I made $306 and the second week I doubled it and then it kind a snowballed to $120 a day! just follow the course.. they will help you out.

    —————>>>>> http://www.Ejobs90.Com

  23. Giving this away for free isn’t the way to generate interest.

    What you should say is that the broadcast is free to certain progressive commenters–who have already been sent a free code by way of their registration email addresses.

    That way, people on the site won’t be talk about anything else all day. But, slowly, everyone will realize that it’s actually free to anyone that clicks on it.

    And they’ll feel like they’re getting something over on their political enemies while listening, too.

  24. Anna . I see what you mean… Virginia `s postlng is incredible, last tuesday I got a new Audi Quattro after having made $5000 this last 5 weeks and over 10k this past month . without a doubt it is the coolest work I have ever had . I started this seven months/ago and pretty much immediately started making minimum $85 per hour . view it
    ????????> http://www.factoryofincome.com

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