Charlotte Chief Won't Release Shooting Video, Clinton Aide Faces Contempt Resolution, Massive Hack of Yahoo Users: P.M. Links

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  • Charlotte
    Sean Meyers / ZUMA Press / Splash News/Newscom

    In the wake of protests and rioting, Charlotte's police chief said he is not going to release video footage that shows Keith Lamont Scott being shot and killed by an officer during a confrontation where there's a dispute about whether he was holding a gun.

  • The Tulsa, Oklahoma, officer who shot and killed Terrence Crutcher at a roadside confrontation has given her side of the story, saying she believed Crutcher was "on something," was not following her orders, and might have had a weapon. UDPATE: The officer was charged this afternoon with first-degree manslaughter.
  • A House panel has approved a resolution of contempt against the former Hillary Clinton aide who helped her set up her private email server after he didn't attend a hearing to testify as ordered.
  • Interest in Gary Johnson as a third-party candidate does not appear to be fading, as has happened with outsiders in previous races.
  • Google has introduced a new messaging app, "Allo," that it once promoted was having end-to-end encryption. But that encryption has been removed. Edward Snowden is warning people not to use it if they don't want their messages read or available to third parties.
  • Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson was hit with a pie at a benefit dinner Wednesday night. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times. The man was arrested and charged with assault.
  • Hundreds of millions of Yahoo users have had their account information hacked. Yahoo believes the attack was state-sponsored.

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  1. Interest in Gary Johnson as a third-party candidate does not appear to be fading, as has happened with outsiders in previous races.

    His chances also remain the same.

    1. You are cheating somehow. One day we will all find out the secret and then market it for a hefty price. Free markets and minds biaatch.

      1. Oh, did I get a firsties today? I guess I did. Well, I guess someone has to.

        1. Holy crap, I can’t believe it’s 4:30 already.

        2. Don’t gloat, Fisty, it ill becomes a man of your dignity.

          1. Super powers are not to be taken lightly, FoE

            1. I have a problem with people casually meandering in here at two past go-time and thinking they’re entitled to the top, look-at-me comment. It’s hard work.

            1. Tonio didn’t really quantify the dignity there. So just imagine whatever level of dignity you want.

              1. Its not much to gloat about so its doesn’t take a whole lot of dignity for it to ill become him.

        3. Oh, did I get a firsties today? I guess I did. Well, I guess someone has to.

          Fist of Etiquette is Eric Cartman!

          1. Doesn’t fit the BMI profile.

      2. Ancient Chinese secret, bm

        1. Lacist!

      3. I choose to believe he encountered a genie and got a wish. He wished to “be the fastest man alive” because he wanted to be a superhero (hence the name “Fist of Etiquette”) but the genie (being a genie) decided to spite him by making him the fastest man alive… at commenting on the website of an obscure libertarian publication.

        His dreams of heroism dashed, he figured he might as well become a libertarian and use his minor super-power and flaunt it over people.

        1. Well thank god for that. I, for one, would hate to read Usain Bolt’s thoughts on the PM links every day.

      4. Too late. Fist already plans to market it once he’s had his fun. And then, when everyone is first, *no one is*.

        1. +1 I’m your biggest fan.

      1. Christ, what an asshole.

      2. Bonjour.

    2. Gary Johnson’s chances of becoming President are infinitely higher than any previous candidate. Trump and Hildog are neck and neck. If he just got one state, or a handful of faithless, but sane, electors, he could deny both of them a majority. It could then go to the House, where the combination of adamant never-Trumpism and never-Hillary would make Johnson the clear choice.

      Of course, his chances still vanishingly small, approaching zero. But they only approach zero whereas in the past they were precisely zero.

      1. Come on, New Mexico! Hillary’s not paying enough attention to you to promise any more free shit.

  2. howdy (not from Canada)

  3. Edward Snowden is warning people not to use it if they don’t want their messages read or available to third parties.

    Snowden has just made a more powerful enemy than the United States government ever was.

    1. Having used Allo for 5 seconds I can assure Snowden he needn’t worry about people using it

      1. What is “app Allo?”

    2. We use Cyph at my work for all our inappropriate commentary.

  4. In the wake of protests and rioting, Charlotte’s police chief said he is not going to release video footage that shows Keith Lamont Scott being shot and killed by an officer during a confrontation where there’s a dispute about whether he was holding a gun.

    Would you?

    1. the family will view police-recorded video of the incident later Thursday.

      Will they talk to the “protestors” about it?

    2. Have to prove they they did the right thing? How dare the plebs question the king’s men! Also, they’re probably lying.

    3. If the video proved the pigs’ side of the story, it would have been released immediately.

      1. It could be a sucker play. Let them riot and rant and rave until it’s boiling over and the DOJ threatens to come in, then release a vindicating videotape.

        1. Lynch said she’s sending four members of her community outreach group, IIRC.

          1. The Community Relations Service?

        2. You think they’re that smart?

          1. The union? Yeah. They’re evil, but smart.

        3. “I’ll take Occam’s Razor for $200, Alex.”

      2. I bet it’s ambiguous and unhelpful in clarifying what really happened.

    4. Of course I can’t blame the police chief. You see, when you’re dealing with one of them new-fangled guns that have a rigid spine, a brightly-colored cover, and a whole punch of pages made of paper, it is waaaaay to easy for ordinary folks to look at something like that and mistakenly believe that gun is a book.

      No siree, it takes an expert eye to see beyond the printed blurbs on the back cover that say things like, “I couldn’t put it down. By far one of the best reads of the year,” and to see past the stuff about “The New York Times Best-Seller!” and correctly identify that object for the death-dealing device it is!

      Thank heavens we have noble protectors who know a firearm with inordinate literary aspirations when they see one!

    5. “The arrests ran the gamut from failing to disperse to assault to breaking and entering, and more arrests may come as authorities review video footage of the protests, he said.”

      He won’t delete these videos. They’ll be on TV.

  5. Instead of poems or limericks today, I thought I’d give you all this, the latest masterpiece from noted author and Nobel Prize nominee (I mailed it in but never heard back) Chuck Tingle.

    Fucker works fast.

    1. Hawt tarded.

    2. Oh thanks, that’s going to replace the meat tent in my nightmares, and wreck my Amazon recommendations as well.

      1. This should help get your Amazon recommendations back on track.

        Although you should’ve bought in the other week. The prices is way higher right now.

        1. I didn’t click this time, but if it’s what I think it is…you are invested in that lube factory.

          1. #shillforBigLube

          2. I think Reason steals all of the referrer link bonuses for Amazon links, so unfortunately I get NOTHING other than the satisfaction of helping people avoid calloused dicks with subpar mouthfeel.

            1. helping people avoid calloused dicks with subpar mouthfeel

              Thanks, I think.

            2. You are a Saint.

    3. Holy shit.

      Amazon really is the best thing ever.

  6. Foreign investment in Vancouver residential real estate plunges after new tax introduced

    Billions of dollars in Metro Vancouver real estate deals dried up virtually overnight after the province introduced a 15 per cent tax on foreign nationals, according to data released by the B.C. government.

    In the seven weeks before the tax was introduced (June 10 to Aug. 1) the total value of all residential sales involving foreigners nationals was $2.3 billion ? an average of $328.6 million per week, the numbers released this morning show.

    After the tax was introduced, the value of sales over a four-week period (Aug. 2 to 30) plunged to $49 million ? an average of $12.3 million per week.

    I guess this is what success looks like.

    1. This has me Laffering.

      1. You went out and supplied yourself with a side piece of ass?

    2. We sure showed ’em, eh?

    3. Jesus that article makes me angry.

      How about you give us instead, two 4-week periods before tax was announced, compared to 4-week period just before the tax came into effect? Then we can see how much is simply purchases being moved forward before it kicks in.

      1. indeed. but the novelty of the story will have worn off by then

      2. The article has been since updated with more details, including:

        “I think it is fair to say we have had an impact. That was the impact we wanted to have,” said [BC Premier] Clark on Thursday morning in Kelowna.

        And she’s the pro-business (-ish) / smaller government (-ish) one!

        We’re fucked.

        1. Someone needs to save from Rich Absentee Chinamen Who Buy All The Houses And Leave Them Empty! Huzzah!

          Of course, NDP is unhappy. As they will be until they seize all the housing and start justly allocating it.

    4. Here’s something useful the U.S. State Department could be doing – “Hi, Justin, I think it’s time we had a Treaty of Friendship and Commerce. On your part, you’d guarantee fair tax treatment to Americans, and on our part, we’d promise not to nuke you.”

      Maybe some big sports league could boycott British Columbia?

      1. (Note to the International Criminal Court: That was a joke)

        1. (the nuke part was a joke)

          1. Hey, I remember intro to the first Fallout game!

      2. Unfortunately, Canada might be the only thing keeping the NHL afloat.

    5. I am conflicted on this.

      If the foreigners were renting them out, this would be a non issue. Are there policies that discourage this?

      If not, then maybe we need to consider the lesson of revolutionary France where the aristocracy locked up 75% of the arable land in private parks. And people starved.

      Citation needed.

    6. And can someone tell me what’s going on in Calgary. I read somewhere the other day that they lost o ver 4000 businesses in the last year. How is that possible?

  7. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times.

    And was awarded a free throw.

    1. I’m in favor of this. Assault, even with a pie, deserves force as a response. Good on ‘im.

      1. Proportional force.

        1. Pie filled with ball bearings?

        2. 2:1 or 3:1 seems adequately proportionate

    2. The assault charge was downgraded to a Flagrant-1.

    3. If Gary did that he would gain 10 points in the polls… to Trump or Hillary or any journalist.

      1. maybe Jill plans to crash the debate bearing pies for both

        1. If she does that, I’ll vote for her.

          1. Her corpse, since the SS would aerate her.

  8. Pugs are the most inbred and anatomically fucked of all dog breeds. Poor little bastards.

    1. Got something like that about humans?

    2. But they got that cute head tilt.

      1. Congenital neck weakness.

    3. More so than English Bulldogs, a breed that’s so screwed up they can no longer mate without human assistance?

      Maybe, maybe not…

      1. English Bulldogs are half human?

    4. I saw one this morning on the way to work. Had its tail lopped off WTF is up with that? It’s not a fucking rottweiler security dog.

  9. Google has introduced a new messaging app, “Allo,” that it once promoted was having end-to-end encryption. But that encryption has been removed. Edward Snowden is warning people not to use it if they don’t want their messages read or available to third parties.

    I mean, its Google, so of course they fuck up something that ICQ was basically doing right in the 90s, and Apple and FB manage to have figured out. Its like they want to always offer a messaging service, but don’t really want to have to support it.

    1. how can they target ads and tune your search results if they can’t read your messages?

    2. They also have three message apps. I don’t know whey they don’t pick one and develop it. Hangouts, Messenger, Google Voice, and now Allo.

      1. Different markets. I use Google Messenger, it’s really good for a basic SMS app. No frills and I don’t want any.

    3. Well, Google’s shit comes packaged on pretty much every Android device by default so who fuck cares if they make an application? They know you.

    1. Wouldn’t it be awesome if no city placed a bid for the olympics?

      1. There are probably enough third world dictators like Lula Da Silva who still want to host the Olympics.

        1. North Korea?

          1. Syria!

            New records in all speed events guaranteed!

  10. Interest in Gary Johnson as a third-party candidate does not appear to be fading…

    One of the PM Links references a Hit & Run post from a couple of hours ago? Is this allowed?

    1. Wasn’t there a time when the Lynx threads all linked to previous H&R posts?

      Or was that the late, unlamented 24/7?

      1. Yeah, that was dumb.

        No one reads the actual links, so they make it harder to do so.

    2. I mean, it’s better than when all the links went to Reason 24/7?

    3. Shackford gives us on time, interesting PM Links on the regular AND is consistently good with his alt-text. If he wants to faff off on one of them occasionally I doubt people are gonna mind.

      1. Can’t argue with that.

      2. It’s a fair cop.

    4. To be fair, which other media site is gonna post that story?

    5. Johnson remains solid.

  11. A House panel has approved a resolution of contempt against the former Hillary Clinton aide who helped her set up her private email server after he didn’t attend a hearing to testify as ordered.

    They’ve found the highest level person they can hold accountable and how.

    1. You think after he sits in jail for a couple of weeks, he’ll change his mind about risking becoming suicidal?

    2. “Oooh, ‘a resolution of contempt’. Guess I’m truly fucked *now*.”

      1. He’ll have an AMA on Reddit any time now.

      2. I believe that the sergeant at arms is empowered to arrest people.

    3. According to the Daily Beast

      “The contempt finding now faces a vote before the full House, and it would then be passed onto the U.S. attorney for the District of Columbia, Channing D. Phillips, who would decide whether to prosecute Pagliano. Phillips was appointed by President Obama in 2015.”

      “Dear Congress, thank you for the contempt referral, I will be sure the give it the attention it deserves.”

      [WIPE] [FLUSH]

      1. (and I don’t mean wipe the server)

  12. Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson was hit with a pie at a benefit dinner Wednesday night. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times. The man was arrested and charged with assault.

    Kevin’s a really weird name for a lady, but hey. California.

    1. Kevin Johnson is such as asshole. But so was the hippie that pied him. I want them both arrested.

      1. There can be a certain sense of noblesse oblige, American-style. Once someone has reached a certain level of fame and glory, it should be accepted as a given that every paper of record wants to run a picture of you and adoring fans will go through your trashcans for the joy of inhaling your dryer lint’s scent.

        A politician taking a pie to the face? The punches seem reasonable. Could have called the response good there without going for official charges.

        1. I wouldn’t go so far as to call punching a person ‘reasonable’ as a response to the old pie gag (even if it isn’t really considered funny by much of society anymore). It’s understandable and forgivable given that he probably thought he was in a fight at the time.

          Given that he gave worse than he got and the other guy ended up in the hospital with stitches, I agree that the charges were unnecessary at that point. Pie man’s an idiot. Give him some community service and toss him off the docket to spend time on real criminals worthy of court resources.

          1. Hitting a former professional athlete in the face with anything is high-level stupid. The guy might only have been a guard and small by NBA standards, but he’s still a beast by normal people standards and an elite athlete. A beat down was pretty well guaranteed at that point.

    2. No joke, I knew a lady named Kevin.

      1. “She” would only do anal.

  13. Hillary – Between Two Ferns

    Wow, she has negative charisma. Sure the Obama interview was barf material but this? This is just pathetic.

      1. I don’t see how this helps Hillary. Obama did it as a sitting president and could afford to be goofy. This is desperate and unfunny.

          1. She must be afraid of low millenial turnout. Next she’ll be wearing flannel shirts and sharing mayonnaise recipes.

            1. Don’t sleep on the artisanal condiment demographic.

            2. Then, I wanna see her on the Eric Andre show.

            3. After, I wanna see her on the Eric Andre show.

        1. The left is in love with this. Well, at least the left media. They are pushing it all over the place. Hilarious! She regrets sitting between two ferns! So witty!

          The left really loves themselves some hero worship.

        1. +1 Sideshow Slick Willie.

      2. My sister in law is convinced she had nothing to do with this and she was just spliced into the interview.

    1. Galliumfucknackolopolis is seriously overrated. He’s got one schtick and he has beaten it to death.

      1. You know who else beat their schtick to death?

        1. The masturbation euphemizers?

        2. I don’t know, but I know who supplied the lube.

          1. Quincy?

            Make it yourself!

            Equipment needed:

            One five gallon bucket
            Power drill with paint stirring attachment.

            Ingredients:

            8 cups methyl cellulose (Trade names Methocel or Mecellose.)
            1 1/2 gallons near boiling water
            ice water to taste

            Gradually add methocel to hot water while stirring vigorously. Be sure to scrape the sides of the paint bucket as you stir. Continue stirring until the mixture has the appearance of a spherical glob of bread dough. This should take about thirty minutes.

            Gradually add ice water while stirring vigorously until desired viscosity is obtained. Continue stirring at least thirty minutes. Let sit overnight to let air bubbles escape.

            This is 90% of KY Jelly. You can have fun reverse engineering the rest.

            1. Is this one of the plot points for the MacGyver reboot?

            2. Dude, I size textiles with the stuff. I don’t cater orgies.

              Another lube story. I had a job in college and shared an office with the department technician. Her job, among other things, was hunting down the esoteric supplies needed for the department’s various field experiments. This was pre-Amazon. So lots of phone work.

              The grad students were going to take vacuum bell jars out into the wetlands to measure the composition of swamp gas or some such thing. They needed a sealant for the jars. Vaseline and such were ruled out because they are too volatile and would taint the experiment. Some one suggested KY Jelly as a possibility, because of the wonderful inertness of methylcellulose. Of course the department needed quantity, and wouldn’t be able to afford the retail price of drug store sex lube tubes for the quantities required. They needed bulk, and bulk pricing.

              So off to work she went, calling various suppliers, asking if they sold the stuff in 20lb tubs. This went on for days. I tried to keep a straight face through out.

              1. Dude, I size textiles with the stuff. I don’t cater orgies.

                That hardly matters. I only deal with 32oz volume AT MOST. You lubricate by the 5-gallon bucket. I’m trying to slip my rap as the lube guy and you’re the perfect person to slide it on over to.

                1. I’m trying to slip my rap as the lube guy and you’re the perfect person to slide it on over to.

                  Aahhhh. That’s sweet.

                  You lubricate by the 5-gallon bucket.

                  We used to make 10 gallon batches, but they tended to get get skunky in hot weather. The more you know.

                  1. You should have your own regular segment: LUBE FACTS with Quincy!

                    1. LUBE FACTS with Quincy!

                      Don’t fuck with anything I mix, unless you want tetanus or salmonella. The end.

                    2. Why is your lubricant so…biologically active?

                    3. You read the recipe. It says “paint bucket,” not “autoclave procedure”.

                    4. Yeah, that’s fair. I also hadn’t realized methylcellulose was used as a medium for viral reproduction studies.

                      So

                    5. “I’m trying to slip my rap as the lube guy and you’re the perfect person to slide it on over to.”

                      Slick.

      2. You know who else beat their schtick to death?

        1. Besides the goddamn squirrels.

        2. Citizen X?

        3. David Carradine?

          Also, these euphemisms have gone dark.

          1. *adjusts tie nervously*

      3. And he’s fat. I absofuckinglutely cannot stand fat men. Somehow he’s fat in the most disgusting way.

    2. Dude, you can’t have a negative charisma. The lowest possible charisma is 3.

      1. I can’t. Hillary can.

        1. +1 Cursed Pantsuit of Charisma

      2. Negative charisma MODIFIER, obviously. Because numerical value of an attribute has last been relevant for 2nd ed Non-Weapon proficiencies.

      3. From AD&D Deities and Demigods:

        http://www.somethingawful.com/…..emigods/6/

        I think this is Sid Blumenthal’s astral form

    3. At least that video means we’re safe from a funny/anti-funny chain reaction by which the entire universe implodes.

    4. When people need to make saving throws to avoid vomiting in your presence, it’s negative.

  14. Vox vox-splains why the riots are a good thing.

    When tensions in Charlotte, North Carolina, over the police shooting of Keith Lamont Scott quickly boiled over into violence, looting, and riots, many people on social media had the same reaction: Why are people destroying their own communities in such senseless violence?

    But this misses the point. This sentiment, experts previously told me, underplays the real anger behind riots and urban uprisings. “People participate in this type of event for a real reason,” Darnell Hunt, a UCLA professor who’s studied the 1992 Rodney King riots in Los Angeles, said. “It’s not just people taking advantage. It’s not just anger and frustration at the immediate or proximate cause. It’s always some underlying issues.”

    Riots are the culmination of these underlying issues. They might be catalyzed by one particular cause ? such as a police shooting ? but they’re also the result of long-held angers ? broader police abuse, residential segregation, economic inequality, and racial tensions, generally, in America.

    What’s more, riots can lead to serious attention and change.

    1. riots can lead to serious attention and change

      Like earthquakes.

      1. Krugman approves.

      2. Think of all the jobs fixing all those broken windows…

    2. The attention created is to provide evidence to those that say black people cant operate in a civilized society. At least that’s a sentiment I’m hearing more today than I ever did before the lightbringer stopped the oceans from rising. I had never heard it before a few years ago.

    3. such as a police shooting ? but they’re also the result of long-held angers ? broader police abuse, residential segregation, economic inequality, and racial tensions, generally, in America.

      Residential segregation? Who is segregating them?

      1. I’m confused. It is bad that there are all-black neighborhoods in cities, or is it bad that wealthy white people move into traditionally black or ethnic neighborhoods and ruin their authentic culture and charm?

          1. It’s also bad when white people leave neighborhoods with mixed populations, turning them into black neighborhoods.

    4. A local small business tweeted about how stupid it was that they got their windows smashed in a “protest” over police violence.

      Occupy Oakland replied: “Some people dont have the privilege of intellectually pondering their anger.”

      1. Occupy Oakland replied: “Some people dont have the privilege of intellectually pondering their anger.”

        stated better: “Some people are too fucking stupid to think before they act.”

        If someone can’t be bothered to think through their anger and instead apply violence indiscriminately, then they’ve forfeited their right to life as far as I’m concerned.

        1. Thinking is a privilege, now?

          The best rebuttal to OO would be something along the lines of, “So, you’re telling us some people just can’t behave like a human being because their intellectual capacity is non-existent? ‘looks over list of stereotypes’ Yep, can check that one off, too.”

      2. Krugman column, on the boon to the Charlotte economy that this will be, coming in 3…2…1

      3. So it is ok for cops to shoot a black guy who might be irrationally violent?

        Or it is ok for cops to be irrationally violent?

        Very confused.

    5. But this misses the point. This sentiment, experts previously told me, underplays the real anger behind riots and urban uprisings.

      experts

      “I’m doing Real Journalism!”

      1. What kind of experts could they have possibly consulted about race riots? I doubt it was a criminologist of any stripe, more likely a gender/queer/racial victimology professor.

        1. Sociologists, of course!

          Data-driven journalism.

          1. To be fair, why riots occur is one of the things that sociology could study that might be useful and interesting. Sociology can be a legitimate area of study.

            1. But when 98% of the field are fully committed leftists, it makes it hard to discern the useful data from the propaganda. It’s a needle in a haystack. (And 98% is pretty close to accurate though I don’t have the source on hand right now)

              1. That’s true.

                My feelings on the subject are basically “isn’t it a shame that a potentially interesting and useful subject is dominated by people pushing an agenda”.

    6. experts previously told me

      These euphemisms are getting pretty abstruse.

    7. “It’s always some underlying issues.”

      Yeah, like the issue of my big-screen TV isn’t big enough and I want a new one.

    8. Screw this, I don’t judge rioters and their apologists by the color of their skin but by the color of their shirts.

      They’re Brownshirts, burning down businesses which are often minority-owned. And regardless of the owner’s race, they’re destroying people’s livelihoods in the name of a racial agenda.

      Nazi Brownshirt fucks.

      1. And the sociologist faces no penalty for saying this stuff because no sensible rioter would want to steal anything in a sociologist’s office.

        FIRST RIOTER: “Hey, looky here, a complete boxed set of the works of Jacques Derrida!”

        SECOND RIOTER: “I got his computer, but it’s an older version.”

        THIRD RIOTER: “Check this out, it’s the latest Fat Acceptance Swimsuit Calendar!”

        1. My mom went to a riot and all I got was this lousy t-shirt (and a bag of Doritos).

      2. Screw this, I don’t judge rioters and their apologists by the color of their skin but by the color of their shirts.

        *applause*

        1. Is that color just their character leaking through?

          1. Gary Johnson’s neighbor’s dogs produce more “character” than these folks.

      3. PS – Some of the demonstrators are nonviolent and concerned about police abuse. A very nice lady who used to live next door has gone to Charlotte to take part in the non-looty part of the demonstrations. She is black and sees this as defending black lives. It would be nice if the leaders of this movement weren’t leading good people like her down the primrose path of retardation and lawlessness.

        1. I recall, as a college student, going to this “peace” demonstration which was actually – surprise! – organized by com-symps who turned out to be big fans of war when they’re the ones waging it.

          Tapping into my infinite reserves of youthful idealism, by which I mean stupidity.

  15. Hundreds of millions of Yahoo users have had their account information hacked. Yahoo believes the attack was state-sponsored.

    Hundreds of millions of people use Yahoo?

    1. Well, most of them are fake accounts.

      1. You misspelled Wells Fargo.

    2. I’ve had the same Yahoo e-mail account since 1996. I use it to sign up for any place I have to give an e-mail to that I really don’t want to. It’s nothing but spam.

      1. I’m pretty sure that’s what everyone uses Yahoo! for, although there might be a few true believers. That being said, I should probably change my account password since I’m fairly certain I haven’t changed it since 1996 either.

      2. I registered with Reason using an antique Yahoo account.

        1. motion seconded.

      3. That’s what my hotmail account is for. 43000 unread messages, apparently.

    3. Don’t you still have a yahoo account for things you don’t want the goog to know about? Drug deals, affairs, hookups, fantasy sports?

      1. wouldn’t that be 4 accounts?

        1. Not if you’re having a really awesome affair.

          1. So an affair with a meth head that lives in an RV and has an addiction to online fantasy sports gambling?

            1. Did you hack my Ymail?

    4. Do you buy any services from AT&T? If you do, then you’re a Yahoo User; AT&T outsourced all their e-mail systems to Yahoo.

      1. AT&T provides internet services?

    5. No, hundreds of millions of people used to use Yahoo but 95% of them havn’t actually logged into their account in over a decade. However, since Yahoo never deletes them for inactivity on the off chance that someone might want to fire up their yahoo account for some unknown reason and still either remember the password or have the same email account they used a decade ago so they can recover it there were still hundreds of millions of accounts to hack

    6. Shit. They got my secret recipe for fettucine Alfredo.

  16. “The Tulsa, Oklahoma, officer who shot and killed Terrence Crutcher at a roadside confrontation has given her side of the story, saying she believed Crutcher was “on something,” was not following her orders, and thought he might have a weapon.”

    1) Might be “on something”?

    2) Doesn’t follow orders?

    3) Might have a weapon?

    That describes 90% of the commentariat at Hit & Run!

    BANG! BANG!

    1. Don’t give them any ideas.

    2. Preet was just a man ahead of his time.

  17. …she believed Crutcher was “on something,” was not following her orders, and thought he might have a weapon.

    Jesus, how long as this betty been a cop? Just say he made a furtive movement and you feared for your life. Don’t give a laundry list of excuses.

    1. This.

      “I thought he might have an AK-47, or at least a Bowie knife.”

  18. Does a resolution of contempt for congress come with a certificate suitable for framing? I would love to have one.

    1. Probably not, but I bet it would look AWESOME on a resume.

  19. Hundreds of millions of Yahoo users have had their account information hacked. Yahoo believes the attack was state-sponsored.

    My impression is that the sudden interest in blaming “International Espionage” for every data-leak is just a convenient way of covering for the fact that things like ‘political parties’ or ‘major media organizations’ are horrendously incompetent.

    Why not attribute *everything* to Russian/Chinese/Hydra-hackers?

    All this time we thought it was “Squirrels”. IN FACT …. those are glitches in the matrix. Caused by the Russians.

    1. I’m in favor of a Hydra ban, I don’t care how many cocktail parties I get kicked out of.

  20. When I was scared, my gun-owning neighbors helped me feel safe

    Last summer I was targeted with online harassment after an essay of mine was published. For weeks afterward, I was afraid to be home alone. My liberal friends reassured me that I’d be safe. That I was brave, tough. That I was loved.

    My neighbors? They taught me how to shoot guns.

    They made a day of it. Two men came over, along with three boys and one teenage girl, and set up swinging targets in the field behind my house. They brought probably 10 guns between them, ranging from a revolver to a semi-automatic. We fitted ourselves with earmuffs, and one of the men, who’d built a number of the guns himself and kept a home arsenal of at least 60 firearms, carefully showed me and the boys the safety features of each gun: touch here, never here. Treat every gun as if it’s loaded. Arms strong and straight. Wide stance. Fire.

    1. So much wrongthink here I just can’t even…UGGGHHHh.

    2. A Jewish dogsledder with a transgender fiance living in rural Wisconsin?

      I smell sitcom.

      1. “Northern Exposure” did it before and better.

    3. I’m shocked the Guarniad printed that.

      1. I was heartened to read it, though.

      2. Read the last line of the article and it gets much less impressive.

    4. Don’t read the comments Crusty, the Guardian is not gun friendly.

    5. My town is lawless in the best of ways, by which I mean largely self-organizing to meet its own needs. Every summer local businesses give out 60 bicycles to schoolchildren, and every Christmas the Schoolhouse Bar acquires for each of those same children, through a muscular tackling of Black Friday sales, a backpack filled with warm clothes, school supplies, toys, and age-appropriate books. They keep careful records each year so that no child receives the same book twice.

      Forget guns, this is probably the most subversive thing Guardian printed in years!

    6. Yeah, even the liberals in rural Wisconsin are pro-gun, no big surprise there.

    7. Deep empathy with gun owners isn’t a distraction from gun control. It’s a prerequisite for implementing it successfully.

      “We must learn how our enemy thinks before we can crush them.”

      The ending clues you in that this is a pander piece.

    8. What kind of idiot goes out and does shit in the wilderness without a gun? I don’t know what types of apex predator live out in Wisconsin but that just seems stupid to me if you’re someone that does outdoorsy stuff far from civilization.

      “As a dogsledder, I regularly spend days in the wilderness, 20 or 30 miles out, and even though I know other female mushers who have been assaulted ? one was stabbed in the neck ? by strangers when they’re on the trail, the most weapon-like thing I carry is an air horn strapped to the side of my sled on the off-chance that it might scare a bear or cougar into leaving me alone.”

      The dumb, it hurts!

      1. “Because in three years of living here, I’ve never seen a police car within 20 miles of my home, and when I called the sheriff last fall over a threatening trespasser, it took him three hours to show up. Because wanting the ability to physically defend yourself feels pretty darn visceral when you live out of screaming range from your nearest neighbor.”

        Oh, god. I’m done. This story is retard on wheels when her conclusions after all of this is…

        Deep empathy with gun owners isn’t a distraction from gun control. It’s a prerequisite for implementing it successfully.

      2. I don’t, and neither to thousands of hikers/climbers, and the number of people attacked by a wild animal in our state last year was either zero or one.

        1. ditto in regards to bear spray. It’s the TSA agent of the wliderness – you only feel safer having it around.
          That false sense of safety is only going to make you less attentive and thus less safe. Ever read the instructions? Wait until the charging bear gets real close and then spray low to the ground. Sure, after wetting myself I’d be lucky to even get the cap off. But it’s the bear’s home and I’m the trespasser.

  21. What should be noted is the effect of ongoing riots on the Presidential race.

    Nothing makes people wanna vote progressive like black people rioting in the streets?

    I don’t think so.

    Hillary wants this to stop.

    Hillary would go down there in person, promise to imprison all the police, and offer everyone a Hillarphone–anything!

    . . . if only they didn’t have to put her back in the iron lung every night.

    1. I think stirring up shit to get out the black vote might be backfiring. But who fucking knows, it’s crazy people.

  22. Dalai Lama Does Mocking Impression of Donald Trump

    Trump shoots back = “This guy lost a whole country, and lives like an hobo mooching off world leaders. Its like he flies in and demands to crash on the white house couch, raids the fridge, has lunch with Richard Gere, and bounces. Hilarious!”

    1. Talk shit, get hit. Bold move going after the Lama though. Let’s see how he walks this one back.

      1. Walks it back? No. This is Trump.

      2. *note:

        usually anything written after the headline (or, including the headline) is just some shit i made up to make it funnier.

        iow, Trump never said that. I wish he did.

        1. Caught it on second read. It’s not impossible to believe he would say something like that.

          1. It’s not impossible to believe he would say something like that.

            Thank you for complimenting my style, if backhanded

            1. Trump wants you as speechwriter. Call 888-456-3854 and ask for SIV.

      3. The Dalai Lama? You mean the guy who wants to ‘free Tibet’ so he can re-institute the monks as the ruling class just like in the good old days?

        That Dalai Lama? Fuck that guy. He’s got absolutely no leg to stand when mocking Trump.

        1. I’m no fan of theocracy, but I would trust the Dalai Lama to be a more beneficent leader than Beijing any day.

          1. Faint praise indeed!

        2. There are sects of Tibetan Buddhism that hate the Dalai Lama and his sect, because they mix politics into Buddhism. You are, like, not supposed to do that.

        3. I thought he changed his position on that.

    2. Don’t worry Tenzin, I’m sure the Chinese puppet that replaces you will be just as funny.

  23. Do you know why you’re not seeing many Hillary yard signs or bumper stickers?

    Actually, you know why already.

    Hillary supporters won’t slash your tires, or key your car, and none that I’ve ever heard will throw a brick through your window or try to run you off the road.

    But thanks to the New Hate, we know some Trumpers have and will.

    Forget stickers and signs. Stay safe and vote this asshole into oblivion.

    1. Of course! That explains the paucity of Hillary signs he in MA! The rampaging Trumpalos that make it unsafe to be a democrat here! Why didn’t I realize that?!?

      1. It’s all projection as usual. From the coments:

        In the last 2 days I’ve seen a yuuuge increase in the number of Trumper stickers. I was just this morning wondering to myself if flipping them the bird was enough. I wanna do it but then I remember I live in a stand-your-ground state and they could easily say they felt threatened. Ain’t tryna get shot.

        1. they could easily say they felt threatened.

          And whose side started to identify non-threats as threats?

    2. Doesnt explain the Johnson signs I keep seeing.

      1. Doesnt explain the Johnson signs I keep seeing.

        You’re getting dick pics from Anthony Weiner?

    3. spin, baby, spin. and by all means, stay in your safe zones. don’t leave them until Nov 9

    4. There are a few bumper stickers that will cause me to run you off the road, but Hillary 2016 isn’t one of them.

    5. Only pro-Hillary thing I’ve seen was a bumper sticker. Directly under one that read “Our Democracy Is Not For Sale!!” Thank heaven I was in a parking lot and not driving, because I doubled over laughing at that.

    6. Try parking in certain areas of Portland, Seattle, LA or SF with some Trump stickers on your car and see what happens.

  24. Iowa Man Busted For Measuring Self With Ruler

    An Iowa man was arrested last night for allegedly measuring his penis with a cardboard ruler while at a urinal inside a college library bathroom.

    The victim told a cop that Morgan subsequently “made a comment regarding his size.” The man added that atop two of the urinals there were cardboard rulers with “dark sharpie markings regarding penis size.”

    It is unclear from the complaint whether the rulers were homemade.

    The article fails to mention how Iowa Man is hung.

    1. At least he’s a looker.

      The victim told police that he “felt weird and uncomfortable” seeing the defendant’s “semi erect penis.”

      During questioning, Morgan reportedly admitted to measuring himself with the ruler. While he denied “being aroused,” Morgan told cops “he’s guilty of being ‘curious,'” according to the complaint.

      1. Yeah, I was hoping for better from a university library bathroom and Iowa.

        1. Not the first time you’ve uttered THAT sentiment, i’m sure.

        2. They didn’t even have a pumpable lube dispenser.

    2. Were the markings accurate? As in, were those standard inches or “AOL inches.” Yes, I’m that old.

      1. I usually say “internet inches” I was a bit of a late bloomer so I missed the AOL M4M chatrooms mostly.

        Have you ever seen “The Homosexual Agenda Revealed” from Betty Bowers?

        1:00 p.m. Meet someone for whom you only know his waist, chest and penis size from AOL M4M chat for lunch at a hot, new restaurant. Because the ma?tre d’ recognizes you from a gay bar, you are whisked past the Christian heterosexual couples who have been waiting patiently for a table since 12:30.

        2:30 p.m. “Dessert at your place.” Find out, once again, people lie on AOL.

        1. O

          M

          G!

          I had completely forgotten about Landover Baptist!

          http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

      2. Single white male seeking a manly companionship of a courtly and flirtatious mann’r. Wilt be into correct grammar, pedantry and prop’r typewrit’r tags. A nay to scoundrels and courtesans.

        -Tonio’s first newspaper classified, 1887.

      3. Why do you think the Euros went to the metric system?

      4. The markings are things like “Secretary’s Home Companion” and “Suitable for Small Cattle”.

    3. Also, the article doesn’t state whether or not he tested his girth with a toilet paper roll. Shoddy journalism at its finest.

      1. Not clicking that, Crusty.

  25. The Johnson is growing closer to me. The campaign signs anyway. Last week I reported seeing some about a mile from my house; now a neighbor around the corner has them.

    1. This comment nicely complements jesse’s link above it.

    2. Inch by inch…

  26. Assad blames US for collapse of Syria truce

    In an interview with The Associated Press, Assad rejected U.S. accusations that Syrian or Russian planes struck an aid convoy in Aleppo this week and that his troops were preventing food from entering the city’s rebel-held areas. He maintained deadly airstrikes by the U.S.-led coalition on Syrian troops last weekend were intentional, dismissing American officials’ statements that they were an accident.

    In Washington, the State Department countered that Assad’s assertions were “ridiculous.”

    Asked about his methods, including the use of indiscriminate weapons, Assad said: “When you have terrorists, you don’t throw at them balloons, or you don’t use rubber sticks. … You have to use armaments.”

  27. I’ve been busy with actual work today, and it seems like I’m missing out on a lot of derp. Instapundit suspended from Twitter? Progressive excuses for racism and violence? At least two videos of Clinton being as uncharismatic as possible?

  28. Not like I’m interested in mere charges any longer, but…

    The Associated Press ?@AP 9m9 minutes ago

    BREAKING: Prosecutor announces 1st-degree manslaughter charges against Tulsa officer who fatally shot Terence Crutcher.

    1. Prediction: Guilty of second-degree manslaughter, 10 years probation, 500 hours of community service.

      The police union will charge her with “blackmanslaughter,” which is a $5,000 bonus and an underage prostitute of her choice.

      1. C’mon. This isn’t Oakland. The union will choose the prostitute.

        1. The union will choose groom the prostitute.

      2. The boys in blue club was never meant to include women.

  29. US & Russia Fight About Syria ; Country Neither are Theoretically At War In

    a line that struck me was the AP reporter mentioning “a fractious meeting of the roughly 20 nations that have declared interests in Syria

    I’m taking a wild guess that actual “Syrians” are somewhere near the bottom of that pile.

  30. —-In the wake of protests and rioting, Charlotte’s police chief said he is not going to release video footage that shows Keith Lamont Scott being shot and killed by an officer during a confrontation where there’s a dispute about whether he was holding a gun.—-

    I can’t stop laughing.

  31. Google has introduced a new messaging app, “Allo,” that it once promoted was having end-to-end encryption. But that encryption has been removed.

    That is incorrect.

    When Google announced Allo, it said conversations would not be end-to-end encrypted by default, but would be in “Incognito Mode”. This has not changed. (For what it’s worth, the decision not to use end-to-end encryption by default, like WhatsApp and iMessage itself do, is/was controversial-ish.)

    What has changed is that Google now says it will retain non-incognito messages on its servers until you delete them, whereas it previously said it would only store them “transiently”, whatever that means.

    1. What the actual fuck

    2. “In related news, Donald Trump just punched a baby in the face.” – Brian Williams

  32. Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson was hit with a pie at a benefit dinner Wednesday night. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times. The man was arrested and charged with assault.

    Which man?

  33. “Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson was hit with a pie at a benefit dinner Wednesday night. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times. The man was arrested and charged with assault.”

    When I saw this, my reaction was, “the assailant is either a nut or a left-wing activist.”

    It turns out I was correct.

    “In a Facebook post on Friday, a person who appears to be Thompson wrote: “Mayor Kevin Johnson is a retired basketball player, and all he’s done for our community is rub elbows with the upper class, and build an expensive arena on the taxpayers dime. Also, she (sic) has some questionable sexual exploits.”

    “In a video on SacCityExpress.com by L.T. Clayton, Thompson said he had been arrested three times as a member of the Occupy movement…”

    1. You wrote that like the set ‘Left-Wing activists’ isn’t a subset of the set ‘Nuts’.

  34. NYT Blowhard = Insists “Clinton is Only Choice“, while not actually making any mention of Clinton’s positives

    its a ridiculous, epic-hyperbolic cry that allowing anyone other than clinton would bring America back to a Jim Crow era, presumably via some strange series of Supreme Court decisions. He rants that ‘not voting’ or ‘voting for a 3rd party’ is the same as voting for Trump; and since Trump is Racist Hitler, you’re basically demanding a black-genocide by failing to vote for Clinton

    As someone else mentioned the other day = if you can’t make a pro-Clinton argument without mentioning Trump, you’re probably wrong.

    1. “”Young African-Americans, like all voters their age, are typically far harder to drive to the polls than middle-aged and older Americans.”

      He seems to mean “drive” in the sense of “cattle drive.”

      Oh, for the good old days when Democrats *could* drive black people like cattle and beat them when they resisted! /sarc

  35. Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson was hit with a pie at a benefit dinner Wednesday night. Johnson responded by punching the guy a few times. The man was arrested and charged with assault.

    Which man?

  36. Father on NYT bomber gives more details on shit he told the FBI = “Keep an Eye on Him”, he said

    “The way he speaks, his videos, when I see these things that he listens to, for example, Al Qaeda, Taliban, he watches their videos, their poetry,” he said he told federal agents.

    In the interview, he spoke about his son’s admiration of Anwar al-Awlaki, once Al Qaeda’s leading propagandist, who is also popular with the Islamic State’s followers, and how he watched Mr. Awlaki’s videos, but it was unclear if he mentioned Mr. Awlaki’s name to the agents.

    Two law enforcement officials said that Ahmad Rahami was never interviewed, even though he was in jail at the time of the inquiry. His father questioned why they never spoke with his son.

    “They didn’t do their job,” he said in the interview, which was conducted in his native language, Pashto.

  37. Stuff I’m Listening To:

    Alchemist – Eminem’s DJ, producer for Dilated Peoples, Action Bronson, others – released 2 short instrumental records in 2015. Both are great.

    he’s pretty prolific. in 2013 he did a record w/ Prodigy (of Mobb Deep) which is far better than anything the latter has done in years.

    1. To all the killers and a hundred-dollar billers.

      1. Mobb deep keep it real tho.

    2. This Israeli Salad is fucking delicious. Thank you. Kind of reminds me of Gramatik or Herbaliser but a different flavor. Goes down smooth.

        1. Yeah, that’s good as well. There’s mountains of stuff in the “instrumental hiphop” bin that is decent in greater or lesser degrees. I’m sort of bored with lots of it unless it has some specific new take on things.

          the last record of that type that i had on heavy rotation was the (first) Express Rising LP, which is on the more narcoleptic side of the spectrum, but more mature than most things of its type. the problem with lots of things in the ‘instrumental hiphop’ bag is that its just *too easy* to make, and hence lots of it tends to end up like these millions of “beat-tapes” which any random loop plus boom-bap is somehow considered an artistic accomplishment.

          1. Yeah, iron horse is nice because it’s well constructed. I don’t know if it fits as hip hop. I almost have a short movie in my head when I throw the album on. I’ll check that express rising when I get home

            1. If you like faux-cinematic music, look into both “Cinematic Orchestra” (which is neither, really, and just a UK jazz band with Ninja Tune-associations), and Calibro 35, an italian band that does remakes of good-soundtracks to bad-italian 70s movies

              1. Sweet. Will do. Thanks sir?

              2. Sweet. Will do. Thanks sir?

                1. Double post and a typo. Perfect.

    3. I got the new avalanches album. Very good, but since I left you was better in my opinion.
      Alchemist is good. One of the better dj/producers out there.
      I want to get doris by earl sweatshirt, but I just bought his I Don’t Like Shit, I Don’t Go Outside. Dark and gloomy.

  38. Jewett Williams update

    “Gathered between a Confederate re-enactor’s tent and the brushy edge of a mown field at the Togus [Maine] VA Hospital complex in Chelsea, some 30-35 people gathered to conduct a memorial service for Pvt. Jewett B. Williams on Saturday, Sept. 17.

    “”He came back a very changed soldier” who “had a very difficult time with relationships,” [Christabell Rose of the Maine Living History Association] said….

    “[Author Tom] Desjardin talked about the recent efforts involved in transporting Williams’ cremains via the Patriot Guard Riders to Maine this past August.

    Then Desjardin explained “what the war did to Jewett Williams.” Although the 21-year-old farmer “served the regiment in combat for only six months,” he fell sick not long after arriving at the 20th Maine’s camp near Petersburg, Va.

    “Until he was drafted into the Army, Williams was apparently as healthy as an ox…

    “By the time that Williams mustered out at Portland in July 1865, he had contracted diarrhea that caused piles, developed rheumatism from sleeping outdoors on cold ground in damp weather, and had also caught pneumonia. Despite these debilitating conditions, Williams was “never absent, never sick, never anything but present for duty,” Desjardin said.”

    1. (there should be an ellipsis between paragraphs 1 and 2)

    2. Sounds like his descendants, if any, can claim they owe no reparations; Pvt. Jewett Williams paid in full..

  39. Hundreds of millions of Yahoo users have had their account information hacked. Yahoo believes the attack was state-sponsored.

    By whom, the state of 1996?

    1. Russians, Putin behind it. He’s dying to know the email addresses of Yahoo users.

  40. Interest in Gary Johnson as a third-party candidate does not appear to be fading, as has happened with outsiders in previous races

    The problem with this analysis, unless I’m missing something here is for starters, the graph does not include Gary Johnson in 2012. Although if it did, I bet you would see that Johnson was polling right around 10% the day before the election, a little higher than he is right now.

    But that’s not the issue. The issue is that after polling around 10% the day before the election, Johnson only got 1% of the vote. The only thing that will convince me that he’s actually doing better this year is if he gets more than 1%.

    The other thing I did notice, that no one much talks about, and this has been pretty darn consistent for at least a couple of months, is that Hillary does worse in a 4 way contest with Johnson and Stein included than she does in a 2 way contest against only Trump, according to the RCP avg. Today, the 4 way drops Hillary by about 1% and that might be all it takes as close as this is. Johnson as the spoiler! Good for the lulz! At last the libertarian party will have accomplished something! Libertarian moment?

  41. The Tulsa, Oklahoma, officer who shot and killed Terrence Crutcher at a roadside confrontation has given her side of the story, saying she believed Crutcher was “on something,” was not following her orders, and might have had a weapon. UDPATE: The officer was charged this afternoon with first-degree manslaughter.

    Sounds like someone in the Tulsa DA’s office didn’t believe her load of horseshit.

  42. The Tulsa, Oklahoma, officer who shot and killed Terrence Crutcher at a roadside confrontation has given her side of the story, saying she believed Crutcher was “on something,” was not following her orders, and might have had a weapon.

    I wonder whether there are any statistics on whether female police officers are more likely to escalate, and to escalate more quickly, to the use of deadly force than male officers, who on average are physically bigger and stronger and therefore have more non-lethal options. Betty Shelby looks like Crutcher could have flattened her with an elbow while she was fumbling with her taser.

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