Trump Maybe (Maybe Not) Wants Thiel on SCOTUS, Clinton Back on Campaign, Sandra Bland Family Gets Settlement: P.M. Links

• 

  Marc Golub/Polaris/Newscom

  Today in Donald Trump: Peter Thiel is denying a report that Trump is considering him for nomination to the Supreme Court. Trump Jr. says they're not releasing Trump's tax returns because they'll distract from the main messages of his campaign. Trump's doctor says he's overweight and takes drugs for cholesterol, but is otherwise in good shape.

• Today in Hillary Clinton: Clinton is back on the campaign trail after her bout with pneumonia. And the State Department has delayed a response to a Freedom of Information Act request for communication between the federal agency and a consulting firm full of political movers-and-shakers until after the election.
• Police in Columbus, Ohio, shot and killed a 13-year-old boy who allegedly pulled a BB gun on them in a confrontation over his suspected involvement in an armed robbery. Police say the gun looked just like a real gun. Another participant in the alleged robbery claimed that the teen was running away when police shot him.
• The family of Sandra Bland, who died in jail in Texas following a heavily criticized arrest during a traffic stop, has agreed to a $1.9 million wrongful death settlement.
• A man has been arrested for damaging and trying to burn down the mosque attended by the Orlando nightclub shooter. According to a police report, he said he didn't want to hurt anyone and was "embarrassed" by the crime.
• A hitman testified that Philippines President Rodrigo Duterte presided over the extrajudicial killings of thousands of criminals and political opponents when he was a mayor and ordered some of the killings himself.
• The push continues to try to convince President Barack Obama to pardon Edward Snowden.

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

Trump's doctor says he's overweight...

NO, THE MOST OVERWEIGHT.

[Juvenile Bluster]

He's yuuuge.

[BigT]

He's yuuuuuuuuge!!!

[PBR Streetgang]

He's YUUUGGEEE!!

[PBR Streetgang]

dammit

[BigT]

Sick minds think alike!

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Never go for the obvious joke of you want to stand out from the crows.

[Ted S.]

What if you want to stand out from the ravens?

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Then score a touchdown.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Then score a touchdown.

[Agent Cooper]

12 points!

[Ska]

You know, that is, a damn fine post of comeback.

[Riven]

I do love how these manage to escalate despite... probably not coordinating that.

[Hamster of Doom]

I know, right? Hive mind proven? This place just gets creepier.

[PBR Streetgang]

One of us. One of us. One of us.

[John Titor]

Look, you can either be part of the Libertarian Hive Mind, or you can go down the street to the Progressive Hive Mind. Least our hive mind has better pot.

[Citizen X]

Just the classiest escalation.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Only because y'all were late to the party. Well, you, not Riven. Riven is classy.

[Riven]

Hell yeah, I'm classy as fuck.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Has anyone noted that Trump is yuuuuuuge?

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Member when we were all skinnier?

[The Fusionist]

No, but I remember my clothes before they shrank.

[TheZeitgeist]

Strange the bulk given such delicate hands.

[bassjoe]

Beautifully delicate.

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

"I think I got him?"
"You sure?"
"No."
Hilarity ensues.
"Now I'm sure."
End Act I of 'War Never Changes: The Mostly True Story of Superpredators and their Minders"

[Weekend at Hillary's, Jr.]

The push continues to try to convince President Barack Obama to pardon Edward Snowden.

Sisyphus nods in sympathy.

[TheZeitgeist]

If he gets the pardon, Snowden might discover that like diamonds Russian asylum is forever.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Meh. A presidential pardon won't protect him from any of the "unfortunate accidents" that likely await him and totally have nothing to do with the petty, vengeful government officials he humiliated.

[Ted S.]

Rhombi are forever.

[Tonio]

Is it possible for a future president to un-pardon someone?

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Yes. With the hyper-criminalized society we live in, if the next president wants him to pay, then pay he will.

If nothing else, they can charge him with something they know he has nothing to do with and force him to spend years of his life and large amounts of money to get out of it. Sometimes the process is the punishment.

[John Titor]

In 2038 the Cloned Tissue of Hillary Clinton's Amygdala wins and gives him a double secret unpardoning. Which is really just a drone strike.

[CZmacure]

In 2038

The Mayan unixtime calendar ends in 2038, and so will the world.

[thrakkorzog]

I hope it is more interesting than the last time the world ended back in 2012.

[grrizzly]

I cannot figure out what makes Snowden and his lawyers think that he has any chance for Obama's pardon. A bribe perhaps?

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Seriously. Why would Obama pardon him when he has not handed over to Russia anywhere close to the number of state secrets that Hillary has?

[Fist of Etiquette]

The push continues to try to convince President Barack Obama to pardon Edward Snowden.

Since he doesn't have to do his successor he has an open slot.

[BigT]

This could change...Hildog aint outrun the law yet.

[Fist of Etiquette]

The family of Sandra Bland, who died in jail in Texas following a heavily criticized arrest during a traffic stop, has agreed to a $1.9 million wrongful death settlement.

I really thought this one was an actual suicide.

[RBS]

Even so, it was suicide while in their custody.

[Juice]

I'm one of the deplorables.

Hey, lady, looks aren't everything.

[jesse.in.mb]

I really need to get into the snarky political t-shirt business. Someone is making a killing with this stuff.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

What would your shirt say? And would it come with a DVD?

[RBS]

And would it come with a DVD?

Full of YouTube clips curated by HM.

[Fist of Etiquette]

"I voted in 2016 and all I got was this lousy t-shirt and an even lousier president"

[mad.casual]

Wrap it all up with a subscription to Reason Magazine and your choice of a free phone shaped like a joint or a dildo and it sounds like a solid business model!

[lap83]

^You can start with that one.

[jesse.in.mb]

Someone already has it.

*looks defeated*

[bassjoe]

Drumpf's doctor says he's overweight and takes drugs for cholesterol, but is otherwise in good shape.

Uh... okay.

[Playa Manhattan.]

Well, he doesn't drink or smoke....

[bassjoe]

He should probably do both.

[TheZeitgeist]

Odd. I heard Trump promise to smoke ISIS. That can't be healthy.

[Playa Manhattan.]

He's going to fuck them to death.*

*Spoiler alert from last night's South Park

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Hilarious episode. Even better reading all the squirmy reviews by millenials after their sacred cows are slaughtered. The one on HuffPo headlined it about how they make fun of Trump, while being completely silent about the equally brutal treatment of Hillary.

Member when news was more balanced?

[Pan Zagloba]

Member when news was more balanced?

After 2015 Elections featuring PM Zoolander, I'm beginning to look fondly on Serbian state media in early 90s. At least they gave us pirated uncensored hardcore porn over the air...

[Zeb]

I think the spoiler alert is supposed to come before the spoiler.

I don't give a shit myself. I always skip to the end of the book to see what happens. Just sayin.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

If Trump were the parent of an ISIS teenage fighter:
"You think beheading is funny? Or cool?? Well, we'll see about that. You are gonna stay in this barn until you behead all 200 of these chickens. Let's see how you feel after you can't even lift this 20 pound hatchet!!!"

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Who the fuck is Drumpf?

[bassjoe]

Ha! I downloaded that silly Chrome extension that turns Trump's name to "Drumpf". That was his ancestors' family name before it was changed when they landed in America.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Umm...who cares?

[Pan Zagloba]

John Oliver.

Or maybe it was Steven Colbert. One of them, and half my Facebook feed for a week after they came up with it.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Is this one of those things that proggies smugly repeat over and over as though they cleverly thought of it themselves?

[Weekend at Hillary's, Jr.]

+1 Faux news
+1 Bush lied people died

[Eric]

+1 Hitlery
+1 Hildabeast
+1 Crooked Hillary

Your candidate (bullshit, you love him you fucking republican shill*) came up with the last one.

*Sorry...Bad day at work and I need to take it out somewhere...really...sorry, I don't know you. I'm sure your OK.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Faux News is the best because it only works if you can't read above the third grade level

[Certified Public Asshat]

Well, you asked...

[RBS]

Wait, so the Greatest and Most Hilarious Insult of All Time is just his name as it was before his family came to America?

[Homple]

A fever dream of the preening classes. The current top devil in the Cosmotarian Pandemonium.

[John Titor]

Because Trump's ancestors actually assimilating and Anglicizing their name validates a talking point somehow.

[waffles]

WHYCOME YOU NO WANT MAKE TRUMP DRUMPF AGAIN!?

[Homple]

Probably for the same reason that they don't want to make Jon Stewart into Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz again.

[Possible Bot]

Something John Oliver said so prog guessing are required by law to parrot it or be banished to the basket of deplorables.

[This Machine]

?Police in Columbus, Ohio, shot and killed a 13-year-old boy who allegedly pulled a BB gun on them in a confrontation over his suspected involvement in an armed robbery. Police say the gun looked just like a real gun. Another participant in the alleged robbery claimed that the teen was running away when police shot him.

Oh good. I expect plenty of calm and reasonable debate.

[BigT]

OHIO teen brandishing toy gun shot down...again.

Cbus just keeping up with CLE.

[Trshmnstr smells of Lo Mein]

To be fair, it did look like this and he had just finished robbing a guy with it.

[perlchpr]

As a member of the most privileged white male caste, I would expect to be shot if I pointed that at a cop. Anyone else is just screwed.

[ant1sthenes]

Drawing on my j-school gun identification training, that appears to be a glock. No, wait... AR-15? Um... no, sticking with "glock".

[Agent Cooper]

Tyre King, an 8th grader ...

Darn. I loved his commercials.

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

Is that pronounced "Tear" like Tyr, the Norse god, "Tire" like the thing made of rubber that is often the same material found in rubber bullets, "Tear-re-A" like Kyrie that chant that often hangs out with Aria, "Ta Ear Ray" like that author from the Atlantic doing the Black Panther rewrite, or Tie-Ray, like [UNPRECEDENTED].

[Agent Cooper]

Thanks for the history?

[Libertarian]

"Today in Hillary Clinton: Clinton is back on the campaign trail after her bout with pneumonia."

You forgot to put scare quotes around "pneumonia."

[flye]

Today in Hillary Clinton: "Clinton" is back on the campaign trail after "her" bout with "pneumonia."

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

DAMMIT! That was gonna be my first submission!

[Fist of Etiquette]

According to a police report, he said he didn't want to hurt anyone and was "embarrassed" by the crime.

He doesn't get to run for president then.

[Playa Manhattan.]

"A hitman testified that Philippines President Rodrigo Duterte presided over the extrajudicial killings of thousands of criminals and political opponents when he was a mayor and ordered some of the killings himself."

I think we can trust a hitman.

[bassjoe]

Who lies about their job?

[Brett L]

I mean, he's in a roomful of politicians. I think I'd trust him more.

[RBS]

Isn't he the one who just threatened to eat ISIS members in front of a live audience?

[Pan Zagloba]

Only if he's bald and has a barcode tattooed on the back of his neck.

[Citizen X]

That picture gives me a great* idea for a Friday Funny: one of those yellow-ass Minion motherfuckers wearing a Make America Great Again hat and carrying a pro-Trump sign, with the label "Deplorable Me." You're welcome.

*relatively

[Libertarian]

http://freedomsback.com/pat-bu.....plorables/

[B.P.]

Wow. That was quick.

True story: My son named our family dog after a minion.

[Playa Manhattan.]

Please tell me it's Stuart. I hate Kevin.

[B.P.]

Dave.

[ant1sthenes]

"You can take Trump supporters and put them in two baskets." First there are "the deplorables, the racists, and the haters, and the people who ? think somehow he's going to restore an America that no longer exists. So, just eliminate them from your thinking?"

That would make a great clip for a Trump ad. "You can take Trump supporters and... just eliminate them." - Hillary Clinton.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

MOAR LABELZ!

[Rich]

State Department delayed its response to a 2015 public records request for any correspondence between Beacon and agency officials until May 2017.

With all due respect, how is this fucking legal?

[JayU]

Everything the government does is legal.

[Brochettaward]

They don't say we are delaying it until after the election, but that they don't have the personnel to process it in time.

[Rich]

"Then, in good faith, give us what you have. Otherwise, perhaps Judicial Watch will cough up the funds for some temporary staffers to get it done by next week."

[Fist of Etiquette]

And the State Department has delayed a response to a Freedom of Information Act request for communication between the federal agency and a consulting firm full of political movers-and-shakers until after the election.

For reasons completely unrelated to said election.

[Chipwooder]

So Rodrigo Duterte is basically a Bond villain, isn't he?

[jesse.in.mb]

Not in the shadows enough for it, but other than that, yeah.

[Citizen X]

Depends. How many skull-shaped volcanic islands does the Philippines have?

[Chipwooder]

Well, it's an archipelago of 7500 islands, so the number could be higher than you'd think!

[TheZeitgeist]

They do have abundance of remote tropical islands dominated by active volcanic features. There have to be some prime lairs among the multitude

[RBS]

The key is finding which one is the fake volcano though.

[Chinny Chin Chin]

Hint: it's the skull-shaped one.

[ant1sthenes]

More of an Alan Moore take on the Punisher, really.

[Gojira]

It's time for Haiku Thursday. Everyone contribute a haiku.

Keep it topical. Watch as I take a seemingly random haiku, and make it topical to H&R with the final line.

Dick piercings hurt like
Eight bitches in a bitch boat
For Ken Shultz: cunt

[Citizen X]

Gojira's haiku
Only has four syllables
In its last line, bruh

[Gojira]

D'oh! I don't believe I fucked that up. I'll report to the punishment chamber shortly.

[Agent Cooper]

Shu-ultz!

[Playa Manhattan.]

Let's make it really topical.

Hugh was throwing around the term "dick tetanus" earlier. I'd like to see it get a little more mileage.

[Citizen X]

Playa Manhattan's
Off-brand Prince Albert gave him
Dick tet-a-nus

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

5-7-4 fail.

Play-as dick tet-nus
Caused cit-i-zen x to get
bad case of lock jaw

5-7-5

[Private Chipperbot]

Bill's dicking bimbos
Calls Hillary's doc for shot
Stop dick tetanus

[Citizen X]

Props where props are due -
Bobarian's not classy,
But i had to laugh

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Fuck yes, I was hoping for a Dick Tetanus callback. You are my hero.

[This Machine]

Dick Tetanus Responds to Parents' Concerns: Varsity Players "Probably Not" Being Coerced into Steroid Usage

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Dick Tetanus Claims
No Safe Space In My Locker
Players All Scared Stiff

[Libertarian]

I am middle-aged
Want to scare me with a word?
Lock-dick won't do it.

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

Penile tetanus comes
To friends of Jeffrey Epstein
Stick to thick interns

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

Libertarian
Noun: A state of being whilst one--
Hey! A non-issue.

[jesse.in.mb]

There's a calendar for that

Haikus With Hotties

But it's full of Asians, which I'm guessing won't appeal to anyone here.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It's a trap!

[Chipper Morning Wood]

[Nopes it out of Jesse's link.]

You didn't specify male Asians.

[Crusty Juggler]

I should have blocked him yesterday!

[John Titor]

Jesse's Asian Links
Are a mirage of deceit
Here's Grace Park instead.

[BigT]

Bubs dicking fresh tail
Bitch swooning in city heat
Ain't 'Murca Great!

[Juvenile Bluster]

Fuck topical.

Kill my brother-in-
law. Make it slow and make it
terribly painful.

[Playa Manhattan.]

How's that going? Did your sister get strapped up? If so, what gun?

[Juvenile Bluster]

Divorce proceedings are continuing and he's even more of a dickhead right now than he's ever been.

I'm not 100% sure what gun. Think it's a Walther CCP.

[Playa Manhattan.]

I wish her (and you) all the best. Didn't mean to sound insensitive by asking about the gun first.

TRO in place?

[Juvenile Bluster]

TRO is in place.

[Playa Manhattan.]

Good. It's nice and legal now.

[PBR Streetgang]

Bill Clinton. White House
Dick'n bimbos, like old times.
New "oval" office.

[Citizen X]

Bubba's sidepieces
"More like Oval Orifice!"
Lets Hillary watch

[Private Chipperbot]

Trump's Deplorables
Gather in the autumn rain
Hello President

[PurityDiluting]

+1 for conforming to haiku standards of referencing the season

[The Fusionist]

Somewhere in Japan
A Samurai is weeping
At this appropriation

[Citizen X]

Five-seven-seven
Improper form for haiku
Not cool, Eddie. Sad!

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

The Samurai weeps
At this appropriation
Tears flow upon cheeks

[The Fusionist]

Appropriation,
Especially cultural,
Is not cool, bro

[The Fusionist]

"There once was a man from Japan
Whose Limericks would never quite scan
When asked why 'twas so
He said 'I don't know'
'But maybe it's because I always try to cram as many words into the last line as I ever possibly can !'"

[The Fusionist]

True fact: That's the only non-filthy limerick in the world about a man from Japan.

[Fist of Etiquette]

This line has five beats
While this has two more than that
And now I lost count

[waffles]

If your haiku lies
Does anyone even notice?
I'm not wearing pants.

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

A monster presumes
To order fancies from us
We will not be cowed

[0x90]

Five, seven, and five
Politicians can fuck off
This is my haiku

[Fist of Etiquette]

There once was a thread
whose Trump links were left wanting
'cause Shackford's punting

[Eternal Blue Sky]

"participant in the alleged robbery"

Shouldn't it be "alleged participant in the robbery"??

Unless, I don't know, maybe his involvement is certain and we're just debating whether or not it was actually a robbery??

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Modifier-placement matters.

[Playa Manhattan.]

Hillary's height and weight are noticeably absent from her physical report.

I've had maybe 5 formal physicals and another dozen mini-physicals, and the first line, right at the top of the report, is age, height, and weight. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

[Tonio]

Shush, you.

[BigT]

Fat shamer!!!

5'5" 185" doesn't look too good

[Riven]

I'd wager it looks better on paper than it does on a "human" form

[BigT]

After checking, I'm adjusting my estimate to 5'5" 220" for the Hildog

http://visualbmi.com

[Playa Manhattan.]

Paging Crusty.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

It looks fine if you're playing running back.

[Agent Cooper]

Natrone Means Madame President!

[Crusty Juggler]

Outstanding.

[flye]

Hey, Playa! You want me to check out your Hillary?

Overall, your Hillary has room for improvement as far as health goes.

Its best quality is believing its own lies.

Its health stats are not good, and kind of sickly as far as I can see.

That's what I think! See ya!

[Private Chipperbot]

/transfer to professor...

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

But she's a woman. Surely you're not going to shame her by demanding to know her weight.

God, so sexist.

[Brochettaward]

Thiel to the court will be roundly mocked, but frankly, I'd love to see the slap in the face to the lawyer class. It's tiresome that the only ones considered for one branch of government are basically just prosecutors who get funneled up.

[bassjoe]

Thiel is a lawyer.

[Brochettaward]

He's an outsider.

[bassjoe]

Outside of what?

He's a billionaire who made most of his money in the financial industry and now runs a privacy-invading consulting company.

[Brochettaward]

Outside the political class. You don't become a judge typically unless you are involved in that circle. A prosecutor or career bureaucrat-prosecutor at the Department of Justice. You basically have two pipelines if you are a slimy ambitious fuck lawyer looking to climb. Over half of all politicians are lawyers.

Thiel has a law degree and clerked. He hasn't been involved in that world since the 1990's, and then barely. He's a non-professional at this stage.

[Tonio]

There is another pipeline: Law School Professor to Federal Appeals Court to SCOTUS. Sotomayor is the only sitting justice who has been a prosecutor, also the only one to have been a trial judge.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

He meant, "Outside 'er," as in "Outside her," because he's, you know, a homo...

[bassjoe]

Or at least he has a law degree, worked for a white-shoe law firm and tried to clerk for Scalia. I do not actually know if he has passed the Bar anywhere.

[Agent Cooper]

"white-shoe law firm"

Oh, Billy Johnsons, in Dallas.

[OneOut]

Billy "White Shoes" Johnson was a Houston Oiler.

[Chipwooder]

True, but I don't believe he was ever a practicing attorney.

[bassjoe]

He worked for less than a year at some white-shoe firm in NY (he, in a strike of good judgment, decided not to pursue that path in life). I can't find his name in NY's lawyer directory so he was either admitted elsewhere or didn't pass the NY Bar.

[Ted S.]

Or he no longer pays the protection racket (er, bar fees).

[Eternal Blue Sky]

Here's a thought, is there any law that explicitly says an acting president can't be a supreme court justice??

[Tonio]

I think one is prohibited from holding more than one office at once, specifically to prevent that kind of subversion of separation of powers as well as garden-variety corruption. Did you really mean acting president? As when the VP acts as president for a brief, delineated period (like, when the president is undergoing surgery)? If a president quits, dies or is impeached the VP is sworn-in ASAP and then is a for-real president.

[Eternal Blue Sky]

Actually from what I can find the members of the judiciary branch are prohibited from holding positions in the executive... but nothin' on the courts!!

Theoretically, legally, Trump could appoint himself...

[The Fusionist]

Kind of - the President can't have any "Emolument" besides his Presidential salary during his term of office.

So no judicial salary.

[Eternal Blue Sky]

The optics of Donald Trump appointing the first gay supreme court justice would be great, though.

[Eternal Blue Sky]

It'd cause soooo much anger over that "historic" action being stolen away from the left.

[BigT]

Token!

Bad when Heffalumps do it. Heroic and historic when Donkeys do it.

[The Fusionist]

"It is time for an openly LGBT justice on our Supreme Court who will both affirm and symbolize our country's commitment to full legal equality for its LGBT citizens."

Of course, that was earlier this year when the Scalia vacancy occurred and people were suggesting to *Obama* whom to appoint.

[The Fusionist]

If there's a risk of Trump having that kind of a "first," then the media will discover Justices Benjamin Cardozo and Frank Murphy.

"Murphy's biographer, historian Sidney Fine, found in Murphy's personal papers a letter that "if the words mean what they say, refers to a homosexual encounter some years earlier between Murphy and the writer." However, the letter's veracity cannot be confirmed and a review of all the evidence led Fine to conclude that he "could not stick his neck out and say [Murphy] was gay".

"...The fact that [Cardozo] was unmarried and was personally tutored by the writer Horatio Alger (alleged to have had sexual relations with boys) led some of Cardozo's biographers to insinuate that Cardozo was homosexual, but no real evidence exists to corroborate this possibility."

[Libertarian]

Glenn Reynolds uses "libertarian" to describe Thiel. I know nothing about Thiel. Is this anywhere near the truth?

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Not really.

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

As much a libertarian as Gary Johnson.

[notJoe]

So not much.
/captainobvious

[PurityDiluting]

Theil loosely fits the 5 W's of libertarians: white, worked in tech, wealthy, weed (investor), willy lover

[Brochettaward]

Why would anyone believe that we are getting all of the information or even any honest information from medical records released by Hillary's campaign? No one trusts here. That's her issue. It's too little, too late to release this shit no matter what the media does. The bridge has been burnt.

[Tonio]

Scientists reveal most accurate dinosaur reconstruction, ever. And (SugarFree alert), the critter had a highly pigmented cloaca!

The real wonder here, though, is that they found an actual one of these with pigmentation and soft tissue still intact. That is hugely rare in the fossil record.

[Citizen X]

For those who don't know their dinosaurs (or don't have a small child to haughtily inform them)

Heh.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

SIV's gamecocks, though descended from dinosaurs, have highly pigmented cloacas for an entirely different reason.

[waffles]

Flightless birds are really cool but feathered dinosaurs are even cooler.

[Crusty Juggler]

Morning after pill warning after HUNDREDS of unwanted pregnancies: How common drugs and herbal remedies make emergency contraception ineffective

The guidelines, released on Thursday, urge women to take two packs of emergency contraceptive, instead of the standard one, if they are on medication.

The MHRA said that women taking medicines for epilepsy, tuberculosis, HIV and fungal infections may need to take a double dose of the emergency contraceptive for it to be effective.

Women taking herbal remedies containing St John's Wort are also affected.

Old socks can't get pregnant, people. Remember that.

[Juvenile Bluster]

So basically all the same stuff that we've known to cause regular birth control pills not to work causes these higher dose birth control pills not to work? Shocker!

[Riven]

This just makes me love the depo shot even more

[Crusty Juggler]

I commend you for that.

[Riven]

I'm telling you--it's life changing.

At my last checkup, my gyno was asking if I wanted to consider switching. ... Um... Hell no.

[Playa Manhattan.]

By gyno, you mean Old Man with Candy?

I know he likes to say that he's "not that kind of doctor", but how do you explain the stirrups in the basement?

[Riven]

He said they were there for my comfort!

[(((Renegade)))]

You commented that I was the first doctor who kept his instruments warm. So don't listen to Playa, he doesn't understand women the way I do.

[Riven]

I truly feel bad for other women everywhere who have to endure frigid speculums. I should start referring them to you.

[(((Renegade)))]

Yes, please do, but remember that my specialty is young, cute females. I'm not... board-certified for uglies or diseased twats.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

For crying out loud, will someone mansplain the depo shot to me? Is that when the women is on top and you move like Captain Jack Sparrow fighting for his life? How is that supposed to prevent pregnancy?

[(((Renegade)))]

I dunno, when I was... examining Riven, I just gave her a face shot.

[Riven]

Here

[Playa Manhattan.]

"It's a shot that a doctor gives you in the arm or buttocks."

Umm, I'll give you the latter.

[Mr Lizard]

Go on mammal...

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Mammals will go on long after the last lizard has been choked to death with the entrails of the last snake.

[Riven]

Well!

[kbolino]

The MHRA said that women taking medicines for ... HIV ... may need to take a double dose of the emergency contraceptive for it to be effective.

I realize there are lots of ways this can happen that aren't all quite so damning, but I'm still left with a general feeling of WTF is wrong with people.

[Brett L]

In this day and age, HIV positive people can find each other on the internet, and have unprotected sex without feeling guilty. That's probably a pretty big positive for their mental state.

[jesse.in.mb]

Umm, a serodiscordant couple where the HIV+ person is religiously taking their medications has a virtually zero chance of the other partner seroconverting. And that doesn't even take into consideration whether he's taking PrEP and that it's surprisingly hard for a woman not being fucked by a cheese grater to pass HIV on to a male partner through standard vaginal sex.

[Chipper Morning Wood]

Yes, thank you for that visual, Jesse, and for the La Blue Girl flashbacks.

[Trshmnstr smells of Lo Mein]

a woman not being fucked by a cheese grater

*throws doomcock v0.5 in trash; scratches cheese grater off of blueprints*

[kbolino]

It's not so much the risk of partner-to-partner transmission that bothers me, as the risk of mother-to-child transmission.

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm a bit rusty on this stuff, but even 15-20 years ago risks of mother-to-child were very low if the medical staff knows what's going on. If the mother is on a standard regimen her viral load is negligible and passing the virus on would be astronomically hard and the staff will go out of their way to make sure the baby doesn't get exposed during the birthing process (I believe c-sections were standard procedure for this, but again I'm a bit rusty on this).

[Brett L]

Thus the morning after pill.

[Unreconstructed (Sans Flag)]

Wow...been a long time since I had the mental image of a cheese grater involved in sex.

*Starts humming "The S&M Man" under his breath*

[lap83]

I blame Hobby Lobby

[Juvenile Bluster]

The Associated PressVerified account
?@AP
BREAKING: House report condemns Snowden's actions in leaking classified NSA material; says he was not a 'whistleblower.'

There's a shocker for you.

[Pay up, Palin's Buttplug!]

"Google-funded group mad that US Copyright Office hasn't abolished copyright yet".

They're citing regulatory capture of the PTO, a few months after "The revolving door between Google and the US govt" was revealed.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Ha. Ha. Ha.

A flash-bang grenade tossed into a stash house on Forest Street Tuesday night kicked up powdered fentanyl and heroin that SWAT officers raiding the building breathed in, police said.

Eleven of the officers were taken to a hospital to be treated for their exposure to the deadly opioid.

Following weeks of investigating by Hartford and East Hartford detectives into a suspected heroin operation, they learned that heroin was being bagged at the apartment for street-level sale, Deputy Chief Brian Foley said.

With information that a large amount of heroin and firearms were in the home, the Hartford department's emergency response team joined detectives to raid the home about 7:30 p.m., Foley said. Making what Foley described as a tactical entry, the flash-bangs, meant to stun anyone in the apartment, went off and turned powdered drugs on a table into an aerosol.

"That powder was airborne, and some of the SWAT team members were breathing it in while trying to secure three suspects," Foley said. After getting the suspects out of the apartment, the team left the building.

"When they were outside, a few of the members became dizzy, nauseous; some of them vomited. The call was made to send the whole team over to St. Francis [Hospital and Medical Center]," Foley said.

[Sir Digby Chicken Caesar]

the deadly opioid

Either a Lovecraft story, or a black metal album name.

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

Tincture, anyone?

[Agent Cooper]

When they were outside, a few of the members became dizzy, nauseous; some of them vomited.

A few even checked into the Hotel Chelsea.

[bassjoe]

So seriously question: has the "small government" side officially lost? The Republican nominee isn't even pretending to be for "small government" and he's effectively tied with the nominee of the "big government" party.

[BigT]

"So seriously question: has the "small government" side officially lost?"

Quaint. Someone thinks there is a small govt side.

[The Fusionist]

You're not the only one to whom this has occurred:

"Most Republican voters don't view through the world through a sharp ideological lens, especially when it comes to economic policy. If you doubt that, go find a poll measuring GOP support for protecting Medicare or raising the minimum wage. There's no getting around this. Big government won, even on the right, and Trump is the ultimate proof."

[That's A Bingo!]

Nonsense. It's a libertarian moment! Polling of millennials confirmed it.

[Chipwooder]

There simply aren't all that many people in the American electorate who desire small government.

[(((Renegade)))]

The Republican nominee isn't even pretending to be for "small government"

Neither have the last several. And the last one who actually WAS for small government was about 90 years ago.

[Crusty Juggler]

A natural reaction to a Clinton/Trump presidency will be smaller government policies, or even a smaller government party or coalition of parties.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

So seriously question: has the "small government" side officially lost?

In 1929, yes.

[0x90]

1913

[Bubba Jones]

Compassionate Conservatism was W's description of using leviathan for conservative ends.

He felt that government was going to be big, therefore the goal was to use it for conservative ends rather than waste time fighting it.

So, no the GOP has not been small gov since 2000.

[Agent Cooper]

"According to a police report, he said he didn't want to hurt anyone and was "embarrassed" by the crime."

He'll never get anywhere with that attitude.

[Pan Zagloba]

Since I apparently Irished myself in Netanyahu thread, as pennance I offer this striking economic analysis from Our Beloved State Broadcaster: What were investors thinking? Interest rates must rise

When interest rates are falling, buying bonds is smart. To think about why, imagine you had bought a safe 30-year bond back when interest rates were seven per cent. You'd still be getting seven per cent on your money, instead of the miserable few per cent they are offering now.

As long as interest rates continue to fall, that sounds like a great plan. But as I warned in a more detailed column on the subject last year, everything changes when interest rates begin to rise again.

It's a real privilege to see "Wet Streets Make the Rain Fall" effect so brazenly displayed. The speculative economy didn't baloon because low interest rates are awesome for returns - it balooned because with low interest rates bubble money has to go into riskier ventures.

[jesse.in.mb]

Need more clop in your life (I'm looking at you Andrew)?

IOS 10's gif keyboard, or whatever nonsense it is they've pushed out in an update that bricked a bunch of phones HAS YOU COVERED.

And an actual article

So they've made it so you can't search for "butt" in the basic gif library anymore, or "huge" for that matter because one of the results was a woman taking a big black cock to the face repeatedly for all time (I'll let you all dig that one up on your own).

[The Fusionist]

Sir Mixalot is going to be pissed.

[Juvenile Bluster]

I'll have you know I haven't watched MLP in a year, and I was never into clop, and those people are weird.

Now you suckers will have to find one of my other major flaws to make fun of me for!

[jesse.in.mb]

Do you have a gemsona? I bet you have a gemsona.

[Juvenile Bluster]

I have no idea what in the ever loving fuck that is.

[jesse.in.mb]

It has something to do with Steven Universe's fan base, or it did before it managed to become a terrifyingly toxic cesspool of young-adult twitter users harassing creators for murdering lesbian agendered space rocks who code as black women on the show.

[Zeb]

Man, there is just so much out there in the world that I am completely missing out on.

[But Enough About Me]

Man, there is just so much out there in the world that I am completely missing out on.

Thankfully.

[AlmightyJB]

I understood each word just not how you combined them all.

[jesse.in.mb]

You're better off.

[waffles]

Is that something truly outrageous?

[jesse.in.mb]

It's not truly outrageous, I expected it to be the next step in his evolution away from Bronydom

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Which means Apple just sent a cartoon pony vagina to millions of phones nationwide.

Not for nothing, but there ain't no vagina on that pony.

Sorry to disappoint you, Crusty, but it's as smooth as Barbie down there.

[Crusty Juggler]

Let your gardens grow, ponies!

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

Goddamnit, I should have thought harder about what "clop" could mean before clicking the link.

[jesse.in.mb]

I'm impressed by your bravery and youthful folly.

[Riven]

He's too precious for this board.

[You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)]

I honestly thought we were done with Bronies.

I also didn't know anything about iOS keyboard gifs, and I wanted to LEARN.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

+1 walled garden.

[John Titor]

So I was going to get some security paperwork cleared at the base today. So the petty officer's going through my whole information step-by-step, and then asks "so do you identify as male?"

My response: "You serious? We're doing that now? Paper says sex, not gender."

*Petty officer looks down, likely both embarrassed and tired of assholes like me asking about it. Looks back at me with a pained expression.

"Can I write that you identify as male?"

"Sure. For now."

I blame Prime Minister Zoolander.

[Playa Manhattan.]

You're in the hoser military?

[RBS]

I thought that's what Webelos were?

[John Titor]

We prefer Her Majesty's Canadian Armed Forces. But we leave out the Her Majesty's part now because we're nationally insecure.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Does xe still identify as 'Her'?

[Pan Zagloba]

If a new Oliver Cromwell arises, though, I'm sure Canadian ground forces will muster at Nottingham when King Charles raises his standard.

[John Titor]

You joke, and he's before my time, but I know servicemen who would have gladly installed Hillier into the position of 'Temporary' Dictator of Canada.

[Pan Zagloba]

Well I was more making light of the fact that, while Canadian ground forces (are they back to calling it 'army' yet?) are His/Her Majesty's, British Army is explicitly not Royal Army (unlike Royal Navy or RAF) due to the unpleasantness with Charles I, and now we're getting another Charles...

[John Titor]

Sure, I got that, can't say I'm enthusiastic about it. But I'm with Steyn on this one, it's more that a figurehead monarch is an important cultural significance than anything else.

I was just saying, surprise surprise, Ottawa is not well loved by some people.

[The Fusionist]

Don't antagonize the guy who's generating records about you.

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

"I identify as you."

[John Titor]

"I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together."

[The Fusionist]

"My next question involves drug use, but I guess I don't have to ask."

[The Fusionist]

/totally a joke, don't sue

[PapayaSF]

Hillary's doctor claims she had "non-contagious bacterial pneumonia." At least one doctor claims there's no such thing. If it's bacterial, it's contagious, correct?

The lack of journalistic curiosity about Hillary's health is just astounding. "Oh, her personal doctor has diagnosed her with a nonexistent illness. We now have the ICD-10, which lists diagnostic codes for every possible malady down to burns from flaming water skis, but there's no listing for 'non-contagious bacterial pneumonia.' Huh. Well, that's not interesting and requires no further discussion."

Idiots.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

Look, everything the Hillary camp says is completely, 100% unassailably truthful until a new explanation is issued.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

At which time it gets memory-holed in favor of the new unassailable truth.

[Chipwooder]

FWIW, according to WebMD, it usually isn't but it can be depending on the bacteria causing it.

[PapayaSF]

But of course they previously said that a bunch of her staff had it. I think the "non-contagious bacterial" bit is to 1) excuse the hug the little girl photo-op, and 2) cover up something more serious: either aspirational pneumonia, caused by her neurological ailment, or just to cover up the neurological ailment itself.

[John Titor]

I'm more annoyed that the little girl photo-op isn't being hammer even more independently of the illness. That was just the most cynical and artificial attempt at political theatre I've seen in awhile. I mean, it's so blatantly fake that you legitimately would have to be a complete moron to buy it, and no one really is buying it. But Clinton openly treats the entire country like they're gullible idiots and people just ho-hum it, it's amazing.

[Zeb]

Politicians have been cynically kissing babies for the sake of photo-ops for ages. But she is extra bad at pretending to have a soul.

[mad.casual]

Politicians have been cynically kissing babies for the sake of photo-ops for ages.

Not generally after being... perp-walked away from a war memorial though.

[John Titor]

Yes, but not in a way that's so blatantly fake. It wasn't in the context of a rally or event, and that girl flat out crossed a security line with zero problems. That event is literally impossible without being staged, and I really want to know what was going through Clinton's head. Does she legitimately believe that Americans are simply too stupid to notice, or does she just do it knowing that the press will cover her?

In Transmetropolitan there's a scene where the insane, murderous President of future cyberpunk America goes to a disaster zone to give a speech, and a little girl runs up and he comforts her. It's a robot that has been group tested for cuteness with pre-programmed sound bite responses. That's what this reminds me of.

[Derp-o-Matic 5000]

There's also Elsie Dee, the adorable robot child full of explosives in Wolverine

[0x90]

Now you're getting it.

/TSA

[PapayaSF]

Sure, it was a preplanned photo op. And at the time it was done, the campaign's story was that Hillary had stumbled in the terrific heat. "Just look, she's fine!" But they didn't know how damning the video would be when it came out. And then, of course, despite a flurry of echoes from the most subservient of the media ("Stifling heat!"), it inevitably came out that it was about 78 degrees and low humidity when she had her seizure.

So, that explanation becomes non-operative. Then they say pneumonia, which is actually possibly true, because people with neurological problems like Parkinson's often get aspirational pneumonia. But they wouldn't want to say that, so they claim it's bacterial, and yet non-contagious, lest people point out the fact that she'd been traveling around, meeting and touching people.

[OneOut]

Where is CPS ?

[AlmightyJB]

For sure 1

[Gray Ghost]

Flip it around. Even if Hillary wasn't worried about transmitting something to the kid, aren't children rather germ-laden? If Hillary was already sick with something viral or bacterial, why in the world would she put herself in a position to get even sicker by interacting with some "random" child on a NY street?

No, she's sick, but with something chronic, and non-pathogenic. And probably something that her campaign feels the gen. public would never vote for Hillary. if John Q. knew she had it.

[Ted S.]

Syphilis?

[Trshmnstr smells of Lo Mein]

I'm glad somebody went there. I thought about doing it, but thought better of it.

[BigT]

Parkinson's isn't contagious.

[Brett L]

Well, that was their Sunday afternoon lie. By Monday they found a better lie. You can't expect them to address the previous lie.

[That's A Bingo!]

"The lack of journalistic curiosity about Hillary's health is just astounding." -- That's a very favorable way of expressing what is happening.

[Juvenile Bluster]

"Relevant

[Juvenile Bluster]

Fuck, SF'd the link.

Here.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Would have been funnier with the graph flatlined.

[mad.casual]

If it's bacterial, it's contagious, correct?

If it's not contagious, how'd she get it? Congenital, chronic, and/or opportunistic... take your pick.

Hillary came down with pneumonia because 9/11. Don't worry, it's not contagious.

[GILMORE?]

If it's not contagious, how'd she get it? Congenital, chronic, and/or opportunistic

Duh. The Russians.

[Brett L]

Did you actually search the ICD-10 codes, because I think that might exist.

[PapayaSF]

Unfortunately, it doesn't list things by whether they are contagious or not. And there seem to be 300+ listings for bacterial pneumonia.

I'm also curious about exactly when she was examined, and when the results of the tests came in. I suspect the campaign has timeline problems there, too.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

With that haircut, yes, you're a deplorable.

[CatoTheChipper]

Just putting this out there:

https://www.pardonsnowden.org/

You can sign the petition, too.

Of course, it will guarantee that your name will go on a watch list; but, if you're commenting here, you're already on it.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Of course, it will guarantee that your name will go on a watch list; but, if you're commenting here, you're already on it.

Decisions decisions...

[RBS]

I'm pretty sure I got on a watch list in 2002 when I tried to bring several pairs of scissors and three pocket knives onto a flight to Charlotte.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

Were you the 20th hijacker?

[Pan Zagloba]

"So embarrassing, I thought 9/11 meant November 9..."

[OldMexican sine qua non]

Police in Columbus, Ohio, shot and killed a 13-year-old boy who allegedly pulled a BB gun on them in a confrontation over his suspected involvement in an armed robbery. Police say the gun looked just like a real gun.

Anything looks like a real gun nowadays.

Another participant in the alleged robbery claimed that the teen was running away when police shot him.

"It's rabbit season!"

[AlmightyJB]

I posted this article earlier. Looks pretty real

http://nbc4i.com/2016/09/14/at.....east-side/

[The Fusionist]

""A 13-year-old is dead in the city of Columbus because of our obsession with guns and violence," Mayor Ginther added. "It is time for this city and this community to step up to make sure that our children and our neighborhoods are safe.""

[The Fusionist]

I would have thought that the kid is dead either because (a) trigger-happy cops killed him without lawful cause, or (b) he was trying to use violence and the threat thereof to take other people's stuff and this had fatal consequences for him.

Under either interpretation, who is the generic "we" who caused this death by obsessing over guns and violence?

Either the mayor is an SJW who doesn't believe in human agency, or else he's pretending to think that way in order to get votes.

[Trshmnstr smells of Lo Mein]

Either the mayor is an SJW who doesn't believe in human agency,

It's Columbus OH, this is the correct answer.

[Gray Ghost]

Especially when the kid is running from the cops, after the cop's told him to stop, and pulls it from his waistband.

I'd have shot the kid too.

I wonder what previous criminal record, if any, the kid had? We already know the cop's shot someone before this.

[But Enough About Me]

I'm always amazed at how realistic some pellet/BB airguns are; I own an airgun copy of a Beretta PX4 Storm 9mm pistol, and I bought it perfectly legally and above-board at the Bass Pro Shop store just north of Calgary last year whilst visiting. Thing even takes all the accessories that you can slap on the real thing (I have a lovely little laser sight on it).

What's even more amazing is that, for legal purposes, the pistol does not qualify as a "replica" under either the Canadian Firearms Act or the Criminal Code of Canada, which is why you can just go buy one no questions asked. (You are, of course, taking a huge risk simply whipping that thing out anywhere in a populated area ? I actually use mine at a licensed gun range in Langley, and nowhere else populated).

[Gilbert Martin]

"Today in Donald Trump: Peter Thiel is denying a report that Trump is considering him for nomination to the Supreme Court"

Just imagine how much shrieking, squealing and howling from the liberals both inside and outside of the media there would be if Trump were to announce that he was going to nominate Judge Janice Rogers Brown to the Supreme Court.

She views FDR's "New Deal" as unconstitutional (which is correct of course) and that is the non religious equivalent of heresy for the left.

[Zeb]

That would be the best thing ever. Just watch how long it takes them to make some horribly racist comment about her.

[John Titor]

But Zeb, you aren't really black if you've read Atlas Shrugged.

[The Fusionist]

PROG: "You realize that one of those two, Hillary or Donald, are going to win, not a third party candidate?"

ME: "Then Hilary and Donald don't need my help, since whatever I do, one of them will win anyway."

PROG: "You really don't think there's a difference between Donald and Hillary?"

ME: "Probably not, but if I actually believed all the accusations against Trump, about how right-wing he was, I'd vote for him."

PROG: "..."

[waffles]

That'll learn them to talk with you!

[The Fusionist]

I cleaned up the dialogue a little.

I try not to *initiate* these conversations, but I'd like to have answers to their, ah, concerns.

[The Fusionist]

The ellipses were their polite way of saying "OMG I don't even"

[perlchpr]

I've had that conversation. They always look really confused when you say "Look, if I'm not voting third party, it's not going to be because I'm voting for your candidate instead..."

[Zeb]

I had such a conversation with some friends last weekend who are convinced that you have to vote Hillary because Trump is literally Hitler.

No. I might vote for Johnson, or I might not vote at all.

[Brett L]

At this point I'm waffling between Johnson and writing in myself. I don't want the job, but I could probably fuck up the government real good before they assassinate me.

[Enough About Palin]

Another participant in the alleged robbery claimed that the teen was running away when police shot him.

Well certainly he can be trusted.

[The Fusionist]

Look, we can conduct our nit-picking investigation later, *after* the election.

[Free Society]

Hands Up Don't Shoot: Part Deux

[BigT]

The other perps said the kid was involved with the heist.

[yet another dave]

http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/ca.....-1.3764642

I am heartened by the poli-sci professors quote at the "it's embarrasing"

[OliviaAndrews]

My dear, the next five minutes can change your life!
Give a chance to your good luck.
Read this article, please!
Move to a better life!
We make profit on the Internet since 1998! ????? http://www.jobsea3.com

[Playa Manhattan.]

I dropped a "Fuck you, that's why" to my 5 year old at the dinner table last night.

Finish your fucking potatoes, guy.

[Crusty Juggler]

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[DOOMco]

"Fuck off, slavers!"

[Riven]

Have you learned nothing, Playa?

[John Titor]

Dad, when did you start commenting here?