Lena Dunham Apologizes, Fox News Loses Greta, the Bravery of Paul Krugman: P.M. Links

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  • Lena Dunham
    JP, PacificCoastNews/Newscom

    Greta Van Susteren is leaving Fox News effective immediately. Brit Hume will fill in until further notice.

  • Gretchen Carlson will get $20 million.
  • The anti-PC alt-right is hurting the cause of free speech by associating it primarily with white supremacy, writes Cathy Young.
  • ITT Technical Institute is finished.
  • Is Paul Krugman "brave" for saying the media is too critical of Hillary, and is that even true?
  • Vox gotta Vox: Government emails should be even more secret, Matt Yglesias argues.
  • Lena Dunham apologizes.

NEXT: Colorado Libertarian Lily Tang Williams Will Make the Debates After All

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    1. Is your F5-jabbing finger sore?

      1. It’s all ball bearings nowadays.

        1. +6’4″ , 6’8″ with the Afro

    2. Hello.

      The sushi buffet line was long, eh?

      1. Har har.

        1. /wink.

        2. I think you mean “hair hair”.

      2. Some days I feel bad for Rico, and then there are days like today.

        1. Don’t let him fool you, he loves the attention.

        2. He might have got away with this under Welch but, once KMW is firmly in control, his days will be numbered.

          1. She’s the PRINT magazine editor.

      3. eh?

        Can we dwell on the unironic Canadian “eh?” at the end of that sentence for a moment?

        1. I use “eh” all the time, and I’m as far from a Canuckistani as one can get.

          1. I’m as far from a Canuckistani as one can get.

            Quebecois?

            1. I wouldn’t brook having money with a monarch’s picture. The Canadians covet those pieces of paper. A Canadian will accumulate all he can.

        2. We actually say ‘there’ more.

          Like:

          I was listening to Hillary, there and she was talking about the economy there and then started shitting on the stage there and…

      4. enacting the guy at the produce stand by his house to slice up fruit and place it on the rice he brings from home takes time, guys.

  1. Lena Dunham apologizes.

    Can’t imagine for what.

    1. Her regrettable existence?

    2. Some basketball star was looking at his phone instead of paying attention to her at some function or other. She didn’t actually try to talk to him, she just decided to call him out by name on her friend’s show at a later date. Guy himself didn’t complain, but she pissed off a bunch of other SJWs surprisingly.

      1. But had the report of Slate, whose writer thought OBJ had to be gay for not being interested in her.

        1. Yeah, that was particularly dumb, but Slate XX writers are particularly invested in the Lena Dunham beautiful thing. Despite her whole sthick being that she’s not good looking.

        2. whose writer thought OBJ had to be gay for not being interested in her.

          Any cis-clowns think for a second he might be lesbian? Holy shit so insensitive.

      2. “But most importantly, I would never intentionally contribute to a long and often violent history of the over-sexualization of black male bodies…”

        Someone attended re-education camp.

        1. Actually, someone learned hard way that in PC Poker a spade anything counts as two aces, and she’s only playing with one queen among an otherwise ugly hand.

        2. Oh, she went to Oberlin, she didn’t need to get re-educated, just for someone to point out her sin

      3. She was pissed that he didn’t objectify her and she penned what she claims his thoughts were about her because she was wearing a tuxedo and also because she looks like a pillowcase stuffed full of potatoes.

        It also didn’t help that she was dumb enough to tweet that she was trying to grind her ass up on some dude most of the night without him being aware.

        1. I’d eat a pillowcase stuffed full of potatoes.

          1. This being the fundamental difference between a sack of potatoes and Lena Dunham.

            1. shit, yeah, i left out the whole ‘the difference being, ‘ part of the sentence. whoops.

              1. We all got that, except for Chipper, Wylie.

        2. …that she was trying to grind her ass up on some dude most of the night without him being aware.

          Who could blame Odell for not noticing? He’s just Einstein’s man-in-the-box unaware if the sensations are from gravity or being accelerated – it is indistinguishable to him unless he can escape the inertial reference frame and see what’s happening from a distance.

  2. Is Paul Krugman “brave” for saying the media is too critical of Hillary, and is that even true?

    Depends on what your definition of brave is. Or true is.

    1. Any dildo is brave if you are Krugman enough.

    2. Krugnuts probably also thinks the media has been too critical of Obama.

      Apparently 99.9% of the media being in the tank for Hillary just isn’t a high enough percentage.

      1. Hey bro, the content of our media matters…

    3. I applaud him for being out and proud about living in a universe that doesn’t exist anywhere except in his own head.

  3. Gretchen Carlson will get $20 million.

    BUT APPARENTLY WE DON’T GET A LINK.

      1. Crusty is actually Tiger Woods?

        1. That would explain a few things…

    1. Would not, upon the advice of my attorney.

      1. ” Watch out for the bats.”

    2. Where do you see a picture of Gretchen. All I see is some dopey dude in a white shirt rising out of a puddle of darkness.

    3. You’re imagining Gretchen Carlson on a mattress covered in large bills, right Crusty, because otherwise… ewwwww!!!

      Not with STEVE SMITH’s prehensile dick.

    4. She can look OK, she just doesn’t want to.

    5. Would

    6. I thought to myself that’s the best looking pic I’ve seen of her. And then I read the pillowcase stuffed with potatoes comment.

      Ruined it.

  4. The anti-PC alt-right is hurting the cause of free speech by associating it primarily with white supremacy…

    Only Nixon could go to China, and only precious snowflakes can come out for speech.

    1. Back when I watched Jon Stewart’s show before it became the Worship Obama Half Hour, he used to have a segment entitled “You’re Not Helping”. I think that would apply to these alt-right fools.

      1. I thought the attempt to create a new boogyman named “alt-right” flamed out. someone’s still fanning those embers?

  5. The links are finally here!
    I’m as happy as Peter Tork was when they finally got his name right on the opening credits of The Monkees.

    1. I didn’t know you were a daydream believer.

  6. Lena Dunham apologizes

    Today I learned a thing: Lena Dunham still exists.

    I was mildly shocked by this information, but will immediately forget it.

    1. Jesse would.

      1. Would I?

        1. You are known for your terrible taste in women.

          1. This is irony, right?

          2. You are known for your terrible taste in women.

            You take that back! I have great taste in women, I just don’t want to bang any of them.

            1. IRT Lena Dunham, I think he meant to say “terrible tasting women”.

          3. You’re right. He never hit on my wife.

            1. Of course, you don’t hit on your wife, either.

              1. No, she hits back. HARD.

          4. You are known for your terrible taste in women

            Is this about women or Lena Dunham?

      2. Even if she looked like Tom Hardy, the second she started speaking, I would be in the column of “would not”.

        1. Ugh, I know this feel.

        2. Lady B?

          1. She’ll do anything to get out of sending me nudes.

            1. If you looked more like homeless Tom Hardy you’d have no problem getting her nudes, Playa

  7. For $20 million, Roger Ailes can touch up my funny places.

    1. What about for $20?

      /Just trying to bracket in the going price.

    2. OK. We all know what you are, and we are now just negotiating price.

    3. I do believe $20 million would buy a lifetime pass

      1. The price depends on the buyer.

  8. “Lena Dunham apologizes.”

    So she at least has *that* going for her.

    It’s the classy thing to do if you are late with the links, or whatever it was she did.

    hint, hint

  9. Government emails should be even more secret, Matt Yglesias argues.

    Shut the fuck up, Matt Yglesias.

    1. Democrat government e-mails should be even more secret.

      FIFY Matt.

    2. The letter Y has never been more ashamed to be the beginning of a last name.

      1. It was so ashamed of “Adolf Yhitler” that it successfully became silent and had itself removed.

        So, second most ashamed.

    3. Jesus Christ he is a retard. He is just embarrassing.

      1. He’s so ready to be subservient, it’s embarrassing.

        One gets the idea that he engages in very rough self-pegging.

        1. Can you dom yourself? Seems like it ranks up there with self-rape and monomarriage.

          1. These euphemisms…

            1. Pan asks a great question. I think the answer is yes, as MattY seems to have figured out how.

              /maybe a heel-do, or some such device

              1. Remember Billy Idol or whoever it was flogging himself in The Da Vinci Code?

                Like that.

        2. It occurred to me a few years ago that some political in the Obama Administration has the job of being Yglesies’ handler and feeding him the daily talking points. That has to be the worst job on earth. I would rather be a professional snake remover in Australia than have that job. And if the person is a women, oh my God do I feel sorry for her. I wonder how many times she has had to politely explain to him that she has a “boyfriend” back in Chicago and while the origami flowers he made her are nice, she really can’t accept them.

          1. I larfed

          2. +1 TV Guide

      2. The man suffered a massive head injury. We should respect that he’s being paid for doing something — productive isn’t the right word here, but he’s no welfare queen. It’s Ezra Klein who I can’t believe was born that foolish. At least Yglesias has an excuse.

        1. I would respect him, if he weren’t trying so hard to make our lives that much more difficult, under government control.

          When he starts demanding…whatever, that make my life that less free, he can kiss the fattest, whitest part of my ass.

  10. Gretchen Carlson will get $20 million.

    Who? Why? Huh? And there aint even no link.

    Journalism is serious business.

    1. Obviously everyone signed a nondisclosure agreement, duh!

  11. Honestly, I find Reason is (or t least should be) above Lena Dunham. No need to heed her any attention whatsoever.

    Reasonoids on the other hand…

      1. Let me recycle one of my jokes:

        When you play one of her songs backwards, it sounds like she’s singing “Stand By Your Man.”

        1. Not bad.

          1. Uh-oh, what have I done?

            (I’m worried if *Crusty Juggler* thinks I’ve gone too far)

      2. Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston Break Up After 3 Months Together: ‘It Was an Amicable Split’

        Hmmm. Article mentions they were last seen together at Hillstone’s. I have to plug for Hillstone’s, it is fantastic.

    1. It’s Bobby S. He just ‘rolling.

      1. fucking glottal stops.

    2. Yeah, not sure why that’s link-worthy.

  12. Greta Van Susteren is leaving Fox News effective immediately.

    Who can they possibly find as a replacement? There just aren’t that many news anchors out there with half their face frozen from botched plastic surgery.

    1. Greta leaving because she’s the only one Ailes didn’t abuse, and she’s damned mad about the other bitch getting $20 extra-large.

    2. She had a stoke I believe.

      1. Amazing how that ‘stroke’ didn’t affect her in any other way and occurred at the same time as significant changes in her facial features.

      2. I’d stoke her Scientologist fires.

        Meg Ryan had a stroke, too…so did Nikki Cox…and Axl Rose…

        1. Did you just have a stroke? Or two?

        2. She scientologists?

        3. Natalie Wood could have used a good stroke.

          1. The net makes it such a bitch, though.

          2. Ok, that was funny and mean and still no comments? Wow, you guys are letting down the dude.
            Could they all be too young to get the reference?

            1. Oops, orders Refreshing for Dummies

        4. *Pours one out for Portia de Rossi*

  13. Government emails should be even more secret, Matt Yglesias argues.

    Even if Trump were to win?

    1. That could never happen in Matty’s world.

  14. The anti-PC alt-right is hurting the cause of free speech by associating it primarily with white supremacy

    And god knows the only people who reject “political correctness” are virulent racists.

    1. Sounds like something a closeted, virulent racist would say.

      1. Completely,off,topic, but has anybody seen Irish lately?

        1. He was at the Klan meeting last night.

          1. First they let in the Irish, now the Jews? What’s next, anyone less than 75% black?

    2. Much like the people who reject the glory of our current president.

  15. “I took a year off of my marriage, you won’t believe what happens next!

    1. She ended up divorcing him like every single article writer who tries something like this does?

      1. Isn’t this all the same article reposted and reposted and you get the picture….

    2. “She says that she finally reached a breaking point in her early thirties when she realized that despite years of pleading, Mansfield would never be willing to have a child with her.”

      Well, my sympathy for the guy begins to drain away.

      1. That’s something you should agree on before you get married

        1. Or spend all of your money to buy a house together.

      2. I call BS.

        She reached her breaking point in her early thirties and decided to start the “project” at 43? I don’t think breaking point means what she think it means, and it’s odd that she had to reach back a decade to find something to make this her husband’s fault.

        Just say that with no kids and a boring husband, she had no reason not to sleep around.

    3. I find it interesting that, given carte blanche, the woman bangs 12 people and the guy basically gets a different wife.

  16. ITT Technical Institute is finished.

    Late night programming takes an ad revenue hit.

    1. International Telephone and Telegraph stock plummets.

    2. I gotta be honest, I initially read that link as “In This Thread…” I will NOT be going into my experiences with various parts of the internet.

    3. I hope this won’t mean the end of Adult Swim.

      1. A whole lot of ‘Adam and Eve’ and Chat-room advertising stands by at the ready! Mixed with some True-Car.

        1. That, and the one where the woman takes her education advice from the guy cleaning her window.

          1. hey, at least that guy cleaning her window has a job.

  17. Pelosi Demands Republicans Ignore Leaked DNC Documents, Arguing = “If You Highlight Democrat Corruption, The Russians Win

    “Ms. Pelosi, calling the apparent Russian hack into Democratic servers “an unprecedented assault on the sanctity of our democratic process,” said Mr. Ryan should not condone either party using materials originating from the cybercrime.

    “Democrats and Republicans must present a united front in the face of Russia’s attempts to tamper with the will of the American people,” Ms. Pelosi wrote.

    Of course, there was no “tampering with the will of the American people” when the DNC colluded with media to rig the presidential primary, funnelled ‘party’ donations to Hillary, or made tit-for-tat promises of Federal postings to large donors.

    1. Well what else are they going to say to defend themselves. They got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. None of them plan on stepping down, so they’ve got to defend themselves no matter how stupid.

    2. Yeah because the perpetual party of Tammany Hall (and Debbie Wasserman Schultz) has always been about strictly catering to the will of the American people.

      1. For a very small (and affluent) set of ‘American people’.

    3. Pelosi never fails to astound with her complete lack of ethics.

    4. You don’t get it, Russian hackers are so good, they sent all those emails that made it look like DNC was corrupt.

  18. Lena Dunham apologizes.

    For what? Being a weird, ugly little troll person?

    1. What did weird, ugly little troll persons ever do to you to be smeared with Lena Dunhamness?

    2. Damn it, you made me click the link. Where I found this.

    3. Wait, Lena Dunham is a Kardashian?

      1. Bitch, you’d tell me if you was a hobbit?!?

    4. I can’t imagine the world being so fortunate.

  19. The anti-PC alt-right is hurting the cause of free speech by associating it primarily with white supremacy, writes Cathy Young.

    Cathy knows what’s up. PC master race for life!

  20. The Cathy Young article is some first rate stupid. She condemns Yianappolis for defending the free speech rights of white supremacists. Isn’t the entire point of free speech the ability to hold unpopular or even lousy views?

    Young wants free speech advocates to spend more of their time condemning the free speech of others. Young is all about free speech as long as no one says anything she doesn’t like. Then it is everyone’s duty to stand up and shout them down and ensure they can’t get away with saying that.

    I don’t think the words free speech mean quite what Young thinks they do.

    1. The letter Y can’t even.

    2. There’s also the crying wolf problem – if everything is racist, then nothing is.

      1. “They said that I was racist for saying white people were the superior race. But they also said it was ableist to use the phrase ‘take a stand.’ So what’s the big deal?”

      2. I will take Young’s concerns over white supremacy seriously, the day I see her write an article demanding her friends on the left disavow all of the various racial supremacy that goes on there. If she doesn’t like white supremacy, she should take it up with the left who has created a system whereby everyone but whites get to play racial politics. Such a system cannot last and if the alt right isn’t a no kidding white racial identity movement, one is coming if things don’t change. Bitching about it and attacking the people involved isn’t going to help.

        1. There’s always, it seems to me, a certain population of white supremacists. They don’t necessarily need political correctness to trigger them, if history is anything to go by.

          The thing is, we’d thought that stuff had been delegitimized – white supremacists either gave up on their supremacism or else pretended they had.

          Now they have a useful angle they can work – “sure they say we’re racist, but they say the phrase ‘black ops’ is racist, so obviously I’m innocent!”

          1. Meh. There are also black and Latino and gay and Asian supremacists, too. When you’re not quite bright enough to understand cause and effect, it’s obviously a conspiracy that the inferiors are participating in to keep you down. Don’t give them any ammo.

            1. The Internet has educated me as to the existence of white supremacists – I don’t think they’re running the country or anything, but they’re there, just like black supremacists, Aztlan fans, etc., etc.

              Fortunately, we’ve passed the point where white supremacists are *uniquely* dangerous. Now it’s an equal-opportunity environment where, out on the fringes, you got white, black, yellow and brown racists, all singing in perfect harmony.

              1. That’s what I said.

              2. It would be very dangerous to let all those supremacists come together. If there were only some way to drive them apart…

            2. When you’re not quite bright enough to understand cause and effect, it’s obviously a conspiracy that the inferiors are participating in to keep you down.

              So, “white supremacists” are people who make excuses for the failures of white civilizations? That’s … not what I was expecting.

              1. No. The reason they aren’t enjoying all the benefits of America (or Germany or wherever) is because some group of “others” has stolen from them some mythical place where people with an 87 IQ made good money and had people to look down on. Flip the script however it works for your particular identified group.

                1. So all this media freakout is about Stormfront white trash? That seems even more unlikely.

                  1. where people with an 87 IQ made good money and had people to look down on

                    So white supremacists want lots of blacks, because they can look down on more than half of them?

                    This isn’t making a ton of sense.

                    1. It’s not fucking rational. It’s a conspiracy theory to make mostly dim people feel better about not quite understanding why the world doesn’t work the way they think it should. And some really smart people making money or deriving power off it.

                    2. It’s a conspiracy theory … And some really smart people making money or deriving power off it.

                      Really smart people are getting rich and/or powerful from white supremacy conspiracy theories?

                      I suspect there’s a reason you haven’t dropped any names.

          2. Who are “white supremacists?”

            Now they have a useful angle they can work – “sure they say we’re racist, but they say the phrase ‘black ops’ is racist, so obviously I’m innocent!”

            Pretty sure people who are called “white supremacists” aren’t particularly concerned about the “racist!” accusation.

  21. “That’s a marshmallow. That’s a child. That’s a dog. Do I want to fuck it?”

    1. That sounds like a really uncomfortable game of “Marry, Fuck, Kill” right there.

      1. Years from now, I will use this to short-circuit our robot overlords.

  22. Incestuous, child-molester Lena Dunham apologizes.

  23. Maybe Sensing the Public Doesn’t Give a Shit About Nefarious Russians…

    … Media Shifts Back to Nefarious Koch Bros as the Evil Plotting Manipulators Du-Jour

    Almost nothing mentioned about the fact that these Super Villains who hold the strings of the GOP have spent little during this election cycle, and had zero influence over the campaigns.

    They try and make it sound scary, but what they describe sounds pretty goddamn benign

    The Kochs will be key figures in any discussion about what direction the party takes after 2016, and they are determined to steer it toward their free-market vision. …

    The network hopes that … activists will learn how to make a compelling, personal pitch to win over new converts to the cause, and that if volunteers are grounded in a strong philosophical understanding of free-market principles, they will be better prepared not only to explain their beliefs but also to ward off candidates, like Mr. Trump, who do not espouse their vision.

    “We want a cultural shift of people being able to know what they want and how to talk to the people in their communities, so that in the future, when there are political leaders that want to demagogue free-market issues, they do hit resistance,” said Levi Russell, the director of public affairs for Americans for Prosperity.

    1. But the Kochs hate Trump. Doesn’t that make shifting to the nefarious Koch brothers in an effort to get Hillary elected over Trump kind of a useless gesture?

      1. It does not make it useless.

        I live among proggies. They hate the Koch’s with a fury due to the success of the propaganda against them. That propaganda is essentially the same as Oceania’s demonization of Goldstein. Why did Obamacare fail? The Koch’s lobbied against it. Why are there no windmills in your state? The Koch brothers climate denialism. Why are your schools so hard up for money? The Koch brothers’ interference in the Dept of Education’s programs.

        The purpose of the propaganda is to motivate the proggies I live with. They are dispirited. They know, instinctively, that there is something seriously wrong with Clinton. They can’t put their finger on it, but they know. They are less interested in voting for Clinton that voting against the enemy. And thus the message is, ”

        Vote for Clinton, and deny Goldstein his victory!”

        1. And the fact that the Kochs hate Trump and wouldn’t view his winning as a victory doesn’t matter I guess. Why let reality get in the way of things?

          1. Reality is not popular on the left

            1. Reality isn’t popular in politics

        2. In our little Bay Area suburb a small group of grass-roots locals has taken on the David-Goliath task of standing up to the local developers/real-estate/city council cabal in trying to maintain local zoning.

          Our super-lefty Mayor has actually come out publicly and said she believes that this small group of locals is just an “astroturf” front for the Koch Brothers. (Why the Koch brothers would be interested in the zoning decisions of a small town are beyond me, and I know several of the locals involved, they’re definitely NOT a front for anyone).

          You’re right that the Left has somehow elevated the Kochs to the source of everything bad. Unexpected rain this morning? Koch Brothers. Get a flat tire? Koch Brothers. Did your favorite baseball team lose today? Koch Brothers.

          1. The meme of “I blame Obama” only serves to confirm their obsession with the Kochs. As Epi has remarked many times, proggies’ capacity for projection is bottomless.

            1. Thanks, Koch Bros!

    2. A friend of mine used to recite NWA lyrics, replacing “nigga” with “cracka”.

      1. Dan Finnerty and The Dan Band did this to hilarious effect on their version of Erykah Badu’s “Tyrone” — “…you know the deal, cracka”

  24. So she apologizes for being a narcissist but won’t apologize for fingering her sister when they were kids?

    I swear, I don’t get Hollywood.

    1. won’t apologize for fingering her sister when they were kids

      Has the statute of limitations run out?

      Asking for a friend.

    2. Those passages went through an editing and printing process, and no one thought it was a bit too much?

      1. I think you’re operating under the mistaken assumption that an editor anywhere actually reads the shit they’re editing. You’re lucky if they even notice all the red and green squiggles before sending it off to the printshop.

      2. Um, why would they? They don’t cRe about one of their own sexually molesting a kid when there’s a fraternity somewhere having a taco and tequila party on May 5th or a Trump press conference to misquote.

    3. Maybe her sister liked it.

      1. Y’know the thing about Lena, she’s got… lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes. When she comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be livin’… until she fingers ya. And those black eyes roll over white, and then… oh, then you hear that terrible high-pitch screamin’, the mattress turns red, and spite of all the poundin’ and the hollerin’, she comes in and she… rapes you to pieces.

        1. That whole thing just sounded like a pretty young kid doing the kind of curious/weird shit kids do.

          I’m annoyed that I even know about it.

          1. Wasn’t Dunham like 12 or 13? I’m pretty sure kids that age know not to put their fingers inside someone else.

            1. Even if not, as an adult should have the fucking sense to skip it in your book.

              1. Never tell your ghost writer: “Make me look like a precocious Roman Pulanski”

  25. http://www.foxnews.com/politic…..tions.html

    The Democratic questions during the Bengazi hearing were stage managed by the Clinton campaign. Let me get my shocked face.

    1. Man, how unbelievable. This news, it’s just… I don’t even know how to react, it’s so unbelievable!

    2. Do you have any other kind of face?

  26. OT update on the fj40.
    Taking the roll cage out was a pain. Only a quarter of the bolts were decent enough to come out properly. Everything on this project has looked 10 times easier or quicker than it turns out.
    Everything was taped up and ready for primer by Sunday around lunch. Labor day I primed everything, my friend will be giving a second coat this week while I’m back in town for work, maybe even start putting all the pieces back on. Should be put together next weekend.

  27. Is Paul Krugman “brave” for saying the media is too critical of Hillary, and is that even true?

    A better question would be, “Is Krugabe a paid member of Hillary’s campaign staff?”

    1. “Is Krugabe paid by the NY Times?”

  28. Another Story About PC, Which Strangely Has No Alt-Right Component


    A freshman tentatively raises her hand and takes the microphone. “I’m really scared to ask this,” she begins. “When I, as a white female, listen to music that uses the N word, and I’m in the car, or, especially when I’m with all white friends, is it O.K. to sing along?”

    In August, the University of Wisconsin system, which includes the Madison flagship and 25 other campuses, said it would ask the State Legislature for $6 million in funding …[for] a program described as a systemwide cultural training for faculty and staff members and students.

    …that budget request has provoked controversy. “If only the taxpayers and tuition-paying families had a safe space that might protect them from wasteful UW System spending on political correctness,” State Senator Stephen L. Nass, a Republican [and RACIST]

    Mr. Nass’s objection to spending money on diversity training reflects a rising resistance to what is considered campus political correctness.

    1. The “n-word” either needs to go back into taboo status, or become like “Quaker” – formerly-offensive words appropriated by the target group and usable by anyone.

      1. Well, good luck with that.

        1. I’m not spending any political capital on this, you have to navigate the rules as they exist.

        2. don’t be such a porchmonkey, Zeb.

          #takinitback

          1. If ‘porchmonkey’ #takinitback starts trending on Twitter, 2016 will be complete.

            Nice work, both you here and John (with his Sadbeard origami) made me burst out laughing in the past few minutes.

          2. My absolute favorite racial epithet is “Peckerwood”.

    2. There was a great scene in the movie “White Chicks” where the black protagonists were, in fact, disguised as white chicks. They offended the *real* white chicks by singing along with a song which used the “n-word.”

      1. That movie was actually funnier than it deserved to be.

  29. I can think of a better use of county resources than to keep checking in on this suicide watch.

    Also, what kind of fucking parent would allow anything even remotely close to this kind of relationship to foster? I’m sorry, but if a cop started showing up to bring snacks to my 12 year old daughter after midnight because he was mentoring her, he’d end up in a hole in west Texas somewhere.

    1. A crawfish ditch in East Texas is about 5 hours closer.

    2. Imagine any other pedo getting a paragraph in the news story about how “2 families have been changed”

    3. Doesn’t sound as though there was a father in the home and that seems to be a common trait in these type cases.

      I’m pretty sure a father would have been more likely to intervene in that type of situation of an older man showing a little too much interest in a young girl.

  30. Forgive me, fellow nerds, for I have sinned.

    I had to destroy a first edition copy of The Fellowship of the Ring today.

    Don’t blame me, blame the Library and Archives of Canada Act. It was technically federal property and if a charity didn’t want it we were required to destroy it.

    1. They made you burn a book?!

    2. That may well be one of the dumbest things Canadians ever did (other than not joining the U.S., of course)

      1. No, the dumbest was not going whole hog in the Rebellions of 1837 and getting the second Mackenzie constitution, which was basically the U.S. constitution but with an explicit anti-slavery policy. Then we’d have the greatest freedom bragging rights ever.

        1. Canada: Forever the bronze medalist.

    3. JESUS CHRIST!!!!!

      Just rescue the damn thing, tell them you mulched it, and then donate it to someone who would treat it with the respect it deserved!

      Hell, we could have found someone for you (I know people).

      1. Oh sure, I’m just going to steal books from the Canadian armed forces, that’s a career starter.

        I’ve done worse, I’ve had to destroy Hayek last year. But it was in French so fuck’em.

    4. Book burner! You must log on to SugarFree’s site and read all of it. All of it. All of it. ALL OF IT!

        1. The lost city of R’hyleah is a site.

        2. “There’s a site?!”

          Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch’intrate

    5. First edition?

      You’re too honest. Say you burned it and auction that thing on ebay.

    6. You couldn’t have at least danced in front of the incinerator and then fallen in with the book?

  31. Everything was taped up and ready for primer by Sunday around lunch.

    You kids and your euphemisms…

  32. http://www.pe.com/articles/sch…..hills.html

    Parents warned that some students, they of course don’t mention which ones but it couldn’t be refugee or illegal immigrant kids, only a racist would think that, may have leprosy. Leprosy? What the fuck is this the Old Testament?

    1. Maybe they came from Louisiana?

      1. Armadillos are the common reservoir. I also suspect the Cajuns.

    2. Luke 17:11-19 New International Version (NIV)

      Jesus Heals Ten Men With Leprosy

      What’s old is new again.

      1. I never knew about the healing powers of leprosy before.

        1. Cures cancer. The bad parts fall off.

    3. I wouldn’t jump on the “immigrant or refugee” argument just yet. Couple of years ago I got a call from a guy I knew in university. Turns out he got leprosy in the last year of high school digging wells or some shit in Ecuador, and was undiagnosed through university. Rich kids do this shit all the time now to pad their university applications.

      1. So elementary school-age children digging wells in Ecuador? I blame libertarians

        1. That would explain one kid but not two. Unless this is much more contagious than the parents are being led to believe.

          1. I wasn’t offering it as an explanation in this case.

      2. I didn’t realize “contracted Leprosy” was such a resume booster.

      3. Interviewer: Sez here you were digging wells in Ecuador.
        Interviewee: Where? Oh, right…Yeah. Great town that Equackador.
        Interviewer: I was in Ecuador in 1972. Great people. How do you think they differ or are similar with Peruvians?
        Interviewee (biting nails indifferently. Spits nail out): Who? Oh, right. Yeh. So. Do I get the job?

      4. ‘pre-immigrant’? What do you call them before they come here? Does it really matter which party goes where to transfer their 3rd-world-hellhole diseases?

    4. Sounds like a reason to find another school. Apparently this stuff is transmitted by ‘respiratory droplets’ and this is an elementary school. Those kids will lick anything.

      1. Don’t get OMWC excited…

  33. It’s been a while, but it’s time once again for “Shit JB’s prog friends post!”. This attached to a picture of Hillary:

    If Hillary Clinton is a crook, then she’s the smartest God-damned criminal in the history of the world, because Republicans have spent 25 years and 500 million dollars on witch hunts that have turned up absolutely nothing.

    Or maybe she isn’t the one that’s crooked after all?

    #I’mWithHer

    1. Nothing except one smoking gun after another of everything from a pay for play scheme at state to multiple felonious violations of National Security law. If you just move the goal posts far enough, those big meanie Republicans never get anything.

      Even my hard core Prog friends don’t believe this kind of shit anymore. It takes a special kind of retard to still believe in Hillary at this point.

    2. “Turned up absolutely nothing”=”Turned up a vast amount of evidence pointing to at least extreme incompetence and at worse active and continuous corruption, but for some reason no one from her own party wants to prosecute her and people keep ending up mysteriously dead.”

    3. $500 million?

      do they have a receipt?

    4. You know who else got away with years of criminal behavior while being worshipped by a certain segment of the populace?

      1. Every protagonist in the GTA franchise?

      2. Skeletor?

      3. Danny Bonaduce?

    5. Solid.

      If Al Capone was a mobster why did he get caught for tax evasion?

  34. Greta Van Susteren is leaving Fox News effective immediately.

    She found out about all the sexual harassment going on without her and got jealous.

  35. On a serious note, I haven’t had a vacation in a while. I’m exhausted from moving and getting the new auction site up to par. I asked if I could get a little paid vacation time before my year expires and I lose two weeks of time (in mid-October). My boss said they needed me so it would be tough.

    So I devised a plan, whereby I am apparently guaranteed to get a paid vacation.

    Surely that doesn’t just work for The Man, does it?

  36. Fruit Sushi, thanks for being late and apologizing. The picture of Lena Dunham is a great way to ingratiate yourself back into our good graces. Good Day Sir.

  37. So I devised a plan, whereby I am apparently guaranteed to get a paid vacation.

    You’re going to kill somebody in an episode of road rage?

    1. You need to read the link.

  38. I’m afraid to read the link. I’d rather go get a beer.

    1. Cop arrested for creepy stuff in public park – he’s on paid leave while the allegations (which are only allegations, mind you) get resolved.

      Same thing that happens to an average Joe when he tells his boss “I got arrested for creepy sex stuff” – kept on the payroll and allowed to stay home.

      Due process ftw.

  39. update on the fj40.

    When you’re done, it’ll still be an fj40.

    Actually, I had a mid-80s fj60 for a while. I kinda wish I had it back. It was solid; not like the newer luxo versions.

  40. A SJW has apologized for something? This is news?

    1. Apparently, she apologized for something she did, not for something other people did.

      Usually it’s “as an American, I’m so sorry about Donald Trump,” or “as a white person, I’m so sorry about the Oscars not going to more black people,” etc.

    2. SHE IS HAVING A LEARNING MOMENT = SHARE HER STRUGGLE, YOU HATE MONGER

      Despite my moments of bravado, I struggle at industry events (and in life) with the sense that I don’t rep a certain standard of beauty and so when I show up to the Met Ball surrounded by models and swan-like actresses it’s hard not to feel like a sack of flaming garbage. This felt especially intense with a handsome athlete as my dinner companion and a bunch of women I was sure he’d rather be seated with. But I went ahead and projected these insecurities and made totally narcissistic assumptions about what he was thinking, then presented those assumptions as facts. I feel terrible about it. Because after listening to lots of valid criticism, I see how unfair it is to ascribe misogynistic thoughts to someone I don’t know AT ALL. Like, we have never met, I have no idea the kind of day he’s having or what his truth is. But most importantly, I would never intentionally contribute to a long and often violent history of the over-sexualization of black male bodies- as well as false accusations by white women towards black men. I’m so sorry, particularly to OBJ, who has every right to be on his cell phone. The fact is I don’t know about his state of mind (I don’t know a lot of things) and I shouldn’t have acted like I did

      1. “or what his truth is.”

        *His* truth?

        “I would never intentionally contribute to a long and often violent history of the over-sexualization of black male bodies”

        But she *would* contribute to taking herself really seriously, even if in reality she probably doesn’t pose much of a threat to black guys.

        1. + Harambe

        2. Now look what I did, I paid attention to her.

          I said I wouldn’t do that.

          But it’s soooo tempting.

          She not only has a TV show (last I heard) where she’s literally the star of her own personal drama, she gets to have that role in real life…fighting injustice one day, defecting to the enemy the next day and contributing to the violent history of blah blah.

          It sounds like nonstop excitement.

      2. Uh, thinking you’re not attractive isn’t misogyny, it’s personal taste. I think she basically called all gay men misogynists, so probably better get ready to apologize some more.

      3. it’s hard not to feel like a sack of flaming garbage

        The most self-aware thing she ever wrote.

  41. Damn. Everyone mentioned in the PM links someone I would tell to FUCK OFF!!! =D

  42. ITT Technical Institute is finished.

    Fantasy headline: “The Department of Education is finished.”

    1. “Mrs. Nixon is finished.”

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