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Sex

Texas Students Arm Themselves With Dildos to Protest Guns on Campus

Make love, not liberty? Students urge the state to protect "cocks not glocks" on campus.

Elizabeth Nolan Brown | 8.15.2016 1:25 PM

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Large image on homepages | Cocks Not Glocks
(Cocks Not Glocks)
Marshall Tidrick/Facebook

Students at the University of Texas-Austin plan to protest the permission of guns on campus by loading their backpacks with large dildos. The "Cocks Not Glocks: Campus (DILDO) Carry," scheduled for August 24, was organized in opposition to a 2015 state law saying gun-owners over 21-years-old with concealed-carry permits need not ditch their arms when they step into a campus building. It took effect August 1, 2016.

"The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms," states the Cocks Not Glocks website. But "it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class."

The group is referring to a Texas obscenity statute that says "no person or organization will distribute or display on the campus any writing or visual image, or engage in any public performance, that is obscene." And, indeed, Texas law specifies that obscene devives include "a dildo or artificial vagina." It's not clear, however, that any student has ever actually been arrested for carrying a dildo; Google turns up no such tale.

In any event, banning dildos on campus is silly. But so is preventing people from exercising other legally-protected freedoms—like carrying a gun—just because they're near some hallowed halls of learning. Whither the calls for cocks and glocks?

For their part, pro-open carry students are planning a counter-protest to next week's Cocks Not Glocks event. A Facebook invite for the counter-protest asks "liberty-minded students" to "bring pro-2A clothing, flags, signs, etc."

On August 4, Students for Concealed Carry sent a letter to the Texas attorney general asking for relief from the University of Texas (UT) Austin and UT-San Antonio's decision to allow individual professors to institute no-gun policies for their own offices.

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Elizabeth Nolan Brown is a senior editor at Reason.

SexGunsObscenityConcealed Carry2nd AmendmentTexas
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  1. Hugh Akston   9 years ago

    Compromise proposal: fleshlight with a pistol grip.

    1. commodious, blithering idjit   9 years ago

      Threadwinner.

    2. Trshmnstr, green and mangy   9 years ago

      "Thing that goes up not included"

  2. B.P.   9 years ago

    Yeah, why one or the other? This could be a beautiful moment where a divide is bridged.

    1. The Fusionist   9 years ago

      Ha ha, you're such a kidder.

    2. Holger da Dane   9 years ago

      It's depressing, really. Obviously cocks AND Glocks should be just fine, if used peacefully.

      As an aside, it's interesting they chose the patriarchy's most evil and ancient weaponry to make their flaccid point.

  3. Anomalous   9 years ago

    Popehat skewered this perfectly.

    1. C. S. P. Schofield   9 years ago

      Classic!

    2. Clich? Bandit   9 years ago

      holy crap that whole thread is priceless

  4. CPRM   9 years ago

    One way or another someone is going to get triggered.

    1. Pope Jimbo   9 years ago

      I think you mean friggered.

  5. IceTrey   9 years ago

    These kids ARE dildos.

  6. DJF   9 years ago

    The Rape Culture on Campus Marches On!!!!!!!!

    1. Jerryskids   9 years ago

      I would be curious to know whether or not the university has issued any opinions or trigger warnings regarding the two open carry policies. If the 2A people were smart (or at least smart asses) they'd be flooding the Dean of Safe Spaces with complaints of being trerrorized by seeing dildos around campus.

      1. RBS   9 years ago

        "Gun Nuts DESTROYED by Dildo's, Forced to Seek Help From Government"

        1. RBS   9 years ago

          Uh, disregard that apostrophe.

  7. Doctor Whom   9 years ago

    Whither the calls for cocks and glocks?

    Freedom for me, but not for thee. Freedom is a zero-sum game; it is known.

    1. Holger da Dane   9 years ago

      And if you are not allowed to exercise your preferred right, no-one should be allowed to exercise any rights.

  8. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

    You know what else is a thing that goes up?

    1. B.P.   9 years ago

      The blood pressure of sane people everywhere?

    2. Diane Reynolds (Paul.)   9 years ago

      The minimum wage?

    3. If-by-whiskey   9 years ago

      Cheech & Chong (collectively)?

    4. DOOMco   9 years ago

      Money supply?

    5. PBR Streetgang   9 years ago

      Periscope?

    6. DenverJ   9 years ago

      Hitler?

    7. dschwar   9 years ago

      Life expectancy?

  9. Diane Reynolds (Paul.)   9 years ago

    This is the most unintentionally funny, and non-sequitur of a protest I think I've ever seen. Ever.

  10. jonnysage   9 years ago

    Didn't they make a movie about this called PCu?

    1. Clich? Bandit   9 years ago

      "GO AWAY! WE DO NOT WANT YOUR PENIS!"
      ...

      "Wait a minute, if I am nice to them they bring me stuff?"

  11. Diane Reynolds (Paul.)   9 years ago

    For their part, pro-open carry students are planning a counter-protest to next week's Cocks Not Glocks event. A Facebook invite for the counter-protest asks "liberty-minded students" to "bring pro-2A clothing, flags, signs, etc."

    Why not a "Glocks & Cocks" counter protest.

    Perhaps they could even bring in the Mulsim kid and have a "Glocks, Cocks and Clocks" protest.

    1. R C Dean   9 years ago

      Why not a "Glocks & Cocks" counter protest.

      "Don't be a cock, carry a Glock!"

    2. Holger da Dane   9 years ago

      A "why not both?" counter protest would get zero coverage. Too much liberty to process.

    3. Pay up, Palin's Buttplug!   9 years ago

      And the logo could be a crossed dildo and AK-47?

  12. silent v   9 years ago

    no-gun policies for their own offices.

    And a no-dildo policy for their own orifices?

    1. DenverJ   9 years ago

      Nice

  13. Detroit Linguist   9 years ago

    Just to make it weirder, the President of Texas A&M has told faculty they will be fired if they don't allow students packing guns into their offices. Coverage available at the Chronicle of Higher Ed, incidentally, for those who need data. I think liberal's hysterical fear is silly, but I think the counter-counter reaction is kinda silly too.

    1. Brett L   9 years ago

      Is their office on State property? End of discussion.

    2. Je suis Woodchipper   9 years ago

      why have a policy if there's no enforcement?

    3. A frilly pink thing   9 years ago

      You think exercising one's rights is silly?

    4. Bra Ket   9 years ago

      "counter-counter reaction" would be three levels of countering the initial action.

  14. Arizona_Guy   9 years ago

    When a guy starts shooting from the tower, throw your dildo at him.

    1. Bra Ket   9 years ago

      That would be a sexual assault. In Germany they would charge you with sexually assaulting the dead.

    2. creefer   9 years ago

      Most don't know that Chapman killed almost all of his targets in the first 20 minutes. After that, so many people were shooting back at him that he lost all accuracy because he could take aim over the wall.

      1. creefer   9 years ago

        *couldn't

      2. pogi chips for liberty   9 years ago

        You mean Whitman?

  15. John   9 years ago

    Muslim refugees approve of this message.

    http://www.gatestoneinstitute.org/857.....l-assaults

    1. Drake   9 years ago

      Seems like Corsica is the only place in Europe that still knows how to form a proper mob of angry villagers.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrkCk_eIP-s

      1. The Fusionist   9 years ago

        Transylvania isn't in the angry-mob business any more?

    2. Zeb   9 years ago

      I would like to see them fighting off an attacker armed with dildos, though.

  16. Tak Kak   9 years ago

    "For their part, pro-open carry students are planning a counter-protest to next week's Cocks Not Glocks event. A Facebook invite for the counter-protest asks "liberty-minded students" to "bring pro-2A clothing, flags, signs, etc.""

    Why? Seems like an event called "Cocks Not Glocks" works as it's own counter-protest.

  17. DOOMco   9 years ago

    Not that I mind, but I do wonder why someone would want to carry a dildo around.
    They sure should be able to have them on campus.

    1. Hugh Akston   9 years ago

      Unlike you, most people don't have the resources to buy self-propelled hovering dildoes, nor to retain the services of oiled Nubian Adonises as full time dildo-bearers.

      1. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

        I blame Obamacare. That's quite an oversight.

      2. DOOMco   9 years ago

        I'll go adjust my privilege score.

  18. Suthenboy   9 years ago

    "The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms," states the Cocks Not Glocks website. But "it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class."

    What do you expect in a country where it is easier for a kid to get their hands on a Glock than on a book?

    1. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

      I get my Glocks out of the Vending Machine.

    2. A frilly pink thing   9 years ago

      I just love that their response to a restriction on expression is not to demand the restriction be removed, but that a different, unrelated restriction be implemented on something they don't like.

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        The best sense I can make of that is that they believe that people who like guns must necessarily be social conservatives who want obscenity banned.

        They need to come check out H&R.

        1. DOOMco   9 years ago

          2 sides. Must be

          1. Playa Manhattan.   9 years ago

            It is a double sided issue, yes.

            1. Jimbo   9 years ago

              Well for that, we need ________!

        2. AlmightyJB   9 years ago

          This is my rifle, this is my gun.

  19. R C Dean   9 years ago

    The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms

    Should be: "The State of Texas correctly decided . . . "

    But "it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class."

    If you keep your dildo concealed (as you must keep your gun concealed), I don't see how they can give you a citation for taking a dildo to class. Now, if you wave it around and hoot like a monkey, yeah, you'll probably get in trouble.

    1. Brett L   9 years ago

      One of these things is an enumerated right of the individual in the Constitution...

      SLD, I don't care whether you carry one and or both, so long as you do so in responsible manner.

    2. DOOMco   9 years ago

      If you wave anything and yell things in class you'll get in trouble. I'd hope.

      1. R C Dean   9 years ago

        This is a protest. Of course that's what they will do.

        Prediction: nobody will get in (much) trouble.

        If I were a prof, I'd get the biggest, skankiest, knobbiest, most absurdly colored dildo I could.

        Oh, and if anyone pulled a Cocks not Glocks protest in my classroom, I'd whip it (the dildo, that is) out and say in my best Paul Hogan impersonation "That's not a dildo. THIS! is a dildo."

        1. DOOMco   9 years ago

          What class are you teaching? Sign me up.

          1. R C Dean   9 years ago

            Advanced Lawn Eviction: Cane-Shaking Techniques From Around the World

            1. Enjoy Every Sandwich   9 years ago

              Oh, you're supposed to use a cane? I thought you were supposed to use an M1 Garand.

              1. R C Dean   9 years ago

                That's the graduate seminar "Modalities of Lawn Eviction Apparatus: An Integrative Approach"

        2. Cynical Asshole   9 years ago

          Something like this then.

          1. R C Dean   9 years ago

            Will not click.

            1. Marcus Aurelius   9 years ago

              But will bang.

        3. Diane Reynolds (Paul.)   9 years ago

          I would make every kid in class have one of those suction cup dildos stuck to their desk, pointed generally towards their faces.

          1. Playa Manhattan.   9 years ago

            "One of those". As if you don't own several. You're not fooling anybody.

            1. Diane Reynolds (Paul.)   9 years ago

              Yes, "one of those", I'm not giving up any of mine for this thought experiment.

        4. Bra Ket   9 years ago

          Oh, and if anyone pulled a Cocks not Glocks protest in my classroom, I'd whip it (the dildo, that is) out and say in my best Paul Hogan impersonation "That's not a dildo. THIS! is a dildo."

          Reference that would not be understood by a single student in the class.

    3. Zeb   9 years ago

      Yeah, if a gun is concealed properly then no one knows it's there. So it really can't be obnoxious.

    4. C. S. P. Schofield   9 years ago

      In other words; please take your dildo and cram it where the sun shineth not.

  20. Brett L   9 years ago

    We already know you're a dildo!

  21. Seamus   9 years ago

    "The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms," states the Cocks Not Glocks website. But "it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class."

    I suspect if you displayed that gun openly, you'd get into a lot more trouble that Cocks Not Glocks would get into for displaying dildoes.

  22. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    With tuition costs where they are, they should be holding an "not in hock" protest. Or, better yet, get to fucking class, do your goddamn schoolwork and graduate, dipshits.

    1. R C Dean   9 years ago

      In any event, banning dildos on campus is silly.

      Good thing Texas doesn't ban dildos on campus, then.

    2. DOOMco   9 years ago

      They'd have to start paying those loans back then.
      Can't do that yet.

    3. Juice   9 years ago

      But this is their schoolwork. The real schoolwork anyway.

  23. The Late P Brooks   9 years ago

    Oh, how precious.

  24. Cynical Asshole   9 years ago

    Students urge the state to protect "cocks not glocks" on campus.

    Yet many of those students are probably supportive of affirmative consent laws and Title IX Inquisitions for anyone accused of sexual assault. So not very protective of cocks on campus either. Fuck them all to death.

    1. C. S. P. Schofield   9 years ago

      Y'all kin f*ck 'em. In the first place, I 've scant desire to get accused of rape. In the second, I'm picky about where I put that.

  25. Zeb   9 years ago

    Well, I wish them all the luck in overturning the ridiculous obscenity law.

    Not sure how they figure it has anything to do with guns. The best I can come up with is that they think that all gun owners are social conservatives who would be upset by the public display of dildos.

  26. Enjoy Every Sandwich   9 years ago

    Well, let's look at the bright side: we've finally found something that "progressives" feel the government can't do! Concealed carry permits are issued by the government, after the applicant has been vetted by the government. You'd think that would be all the assurance that a good proggie would need!

  27. Guy Behind the Guy, Jr.   9 years ago

    These kids today, so hip and transgressive.

  28. The Late P Brooks   9 years ago

    A GUN IS JUST A SUBSTITUTE FOR A PENIS! GET IT? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    1. Brett L   9 years ago

      Is that why my wife insists on carrying mine in her purse?

      1. Holger da Dane   9 years ago

        Careful if the purse has a zipper..

  29. esteve7   9 years ago

    It's amazing how unhinged these leftists get. Whenever gun rights are expanded, crime goes down despite their predictions of a "shootout at the O.K. Corral"

  30. Garth Bigelow   9 years ago

    Just remember that each dildo must come with a trigger warning.

    1. Marcus Aurelius   9 years ago

      Too bad triggers don't come with dildo warnings.

  31. BearOdinson   9 years ago

    The evolution of liberty:

    "Give me liberty, or give me death!" 1775-Patrick Henry

    "Four score and seven years ago...." 1863-Abraham Lincoln

    "We will never surrender!"-1940-Winston Churchill

    "Cocks AND Glocks!"-2016 H&R commentariat

    1. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

      The evolution of threats to liberty:

      The British Empire 1775

      State-endorsed slavery 1863

      National Socialism 1940

      Bunch of college kids with dildos 2016

      1. BearOdinson   9 years ago

        Don't get me wrong, I am totally FOR Cocks and Glocks!

        It just seems that somewhere along the way, we lost a certain eloquence in our defense of liberty.

        Does make for a good bumper sticker though! 🙂

  32. OBJ FRANKELSON   9 years ago

    It is unclear how they feel about H & K, Taurus, Springfield, or are weapons that don't rhyme with anything right out?

    1. bacon-magic   9 years ago

      S & M not H & K
      Tart puss not Taurus
      High Yield not Springfield
      Pussy power not Sig Sauer
      Roger not Ruger

      (all of these are half-ass at best)

    2. JaimeRoberto   9 years ago

      Lessons, not Smith & Wessons.

      Boogers not Rugers.

  33. Eman   9 years ago

    Xthese "protesters" can go fuck themselves. Does that make everyone nappy or what?!?!?!?!!!

  34. Pay up, Palin's Buttplug!   9 years ago

    Maybe someone will bring an assault dildo to school!

    1. Pay up, Palin's Buttplug!   9 years ago

      Or a dildo with detachable magazine, a collapsable stock, a pistol grip, a bayonet mount, a barrel shroud, and accessories mount?

  35. Pay up, Palin's Buttplug!   9 years ago

    Oh, a dildo bayonet on AD-15 would be funny!

  36. Sigivald   9 years ago

    "Our rights are being infringed, so we want yours to keep being infringed!" is ... well, it's not effective.

    Fight for liberty if you want liberty.

    Fighting against someone else's won't help increase yours.

    You'd think the sort of people who push "intersectionality" would understand this, but ... well, the "wrong" rights aren't "rights" at all, natch.

    1. esteve7   9 years ago

      but they don't believe in liberty. They believe in things they like being legal (or forced!) and things they dislike being illegal.

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