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A.M. Links: Gary Johnson Calls Trump 'Racist,' Suicide Bombers Hit Saudi Arabia, NASA Probe Juno Now Orbiting Jupiter

Damon Root | 7.5.2016 9:00 AM

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  • Patrick Ryland

    New poll: Hillary Clinton 39 percent, Donald Trump 35 percent, Gary Johnson 8 percent.

  • Gary Johnson on Donald Trump: "The stuff he's saying is just incendiary. It's racist."
  • Donald Trump has reportedly drawn up a vice presidential short list.
  • Saudi Arabia was hit by three separate suicide attacks in a 24-hour period, including one attack in the Islamic holy site of Medina.
  • The NASA space probe Juno is now orbiting Jupiter.
  • Brexit advocate Nigel Farage is resigning from his role as leader of the UK Independence Party.

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NEXT: Brexit Continues to Reverberate Around the Globe: New

Damon Root is a senior editor at Reason and the author of A Glorious Liberty: Frederick Douglass and the Fight for an Antislavery Constitution (Potomac Books).

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    New poll: Hillary Clinton 39 percent, Donald Trump 35 percent, Gary Johnson 8 percent.

    So close.

    1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      Hello.

      That's some libertarian moment.

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        Those numbers will tighten even more.

        I remember reading something about third-party candidates poll higher than the final vote tally would suggest.

        1. Dr. Pangloss   9 years ago

          Shy tories traitors.

        2. CE   9 years ago

          The third-party types never count the votes.
          Would-be third-party voters have less urgency to actually vote, since they expect to lose anyway.

  2. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    The NASA space probe Juno is now orbiting Jupiter.

    Yep, they can't send that movie far enough away from Earth.

    1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

      I thought it was pretty decent.

      1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

        I guess we know who the next "volunteer" is for on the probe to Neptune.

        1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

          or Uranus *rimshot*

          1. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

            Rim shot?

            Right after Uranus?

            Really?

            *narrows sphincters*

            1. Elspeth Flashman   9 years ago

              Paging Switzy to the white courtesy phone . . .

            2. Swiss Servator   9 years ago

              *narrows gaze*

        2. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

          Nobody is gonna volunteer to probe Uranus; quit asking!

          1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

            Damnit, that's not how it's pronounced! He was the sky god, the father of Gaia!

            [Throws Uranus Halloween costume in the trash in frustration]

            1. Zeb   9 years ago

              We should start spelling it "Ouranos". But then I suppose it could be "our anus".

          2. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

            STEVE SMITH IS ANAL ASTRONAUT. WILL GO WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE.

            1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

              "man"

              1. Citizen X   9 years ago

                Gigantopithecus is not technically a man, even if it does have alopecia.

            2. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

              STEVE SMITH GO WHERE NO MAN WOULD EVER WANT TO!

              ALSO WHERE NO MAN COULD EVER REACH!

  3. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

    The NASA space probe Juno is now orbiting Jupiter.

    One step for man, one giant step for puns

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      Just wait until they probe Uranus, then there will be so many puns we'll grow sick of punning.

      1. Free Society   9 years ago

        Some of them I assume will be good puns.

  4. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    can I get an amen, brother?

    'In the name of cannabis': Marijuana-based church holds first service in Lansing

    The agnostic organization is led by Jackson resident Jeremy Hall, 34, and was hosted at the Lansing Herbal Farmers Market. About 50 people came to the afternoon service, Hall said.

    Besides the message portion of the service, there was food and marijuana-laced food in addition to a raffle for artwork and a TV.

    "The analogy that we used in the service is, 'You don't need running shoes to run, but they help,'" Hall said. "You don't need cannabis in order to be spiritual ? absolutely not ? but for those with the views that that is part of your spirituality, you have a place to do it."

    1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

      Jesus is probably rolling over in His grave at the thought of these people shooting up marijuana in His name.

      1. Rich   9 years ago

        Blasphemous, but nice.

      2. Brett L   9 years ago

        The Power of Christ compels me!

      3. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        He is rolling something.

  5. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    Donald Trump has reportedly drawn up a vice presidential short list.

    He must have written the list on his hand.

    1. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      He'll be here all week, folks. Try your waitress, tip the veal.

    2. Citizen X   9 years ago

      +1 short-fingered vulgarian

      1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        I guess George Stephanopolous is out.

    3. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

      He's got a list of demands, written on the palm of hand

    4. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      I am rooting for Hillary Clinton as his VP nominee, or Trump as her's.

      Things will make more sense if the corrupt, authoritarian statists choose each other as running mates.

    5. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

      *thumbs up*

  6. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

    Gary Johnson on Donald Trump: ""The stuff he's saying is just incendiary. It's racist."

    It didn't work for Rand Paul, so let's see how it fares for this candidate with a mix of Republican and Libertarian views.

    1. BigT   9 years ago

      What has Trump said that is racist? I haven't read anything that I would consider racist.

      (of course, to some people, almost everything is racist)

      1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

        He's made disparaging remarks about large groups of people based on their ethnicity or national origin. Maybe it's some other -ism. It's definitely collectivist.

        1. DJF   9 years ago

          Since my mind can only take in a limited number of people as individuals then I must use some sort of collectivist words and thoughts to describe the rest.

          Maybe there are some people who claim to treat all 7 billion plus people on Earth as individuals, I can't.

          1. Free Society   9 years ago

            Now now DJF, when you get done with your KKK meeting, throw away all your books on statistics and cancel your insurance policy because teh eveel collektivisms.

          2. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

            See, they are not racist! They are storage capacity challenged!

          3. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

            Maybe there are some people who claim to treat all 7 billion plus people on Earth as individuals, I can't.

            Luckily for both of us, neither of has to interact with all 7 billion people. The very limited subset that I do interact with...yeah, I try to treat them as individuals and not make assumptions about them based on a single characteristic.

            1. Cyto   9 years ago

              But if you have to speak of a bunch of people - you know, some people over there somewhere, not directly interacting with you as individuals - how will you communicate which people you mean?

              Like, say you wanted to discuss some belief held by Pentecostal Christians. How would you possible do so if you never talk about them in a way other than as individuals?

              Or Wal-Mart shoppers? Or what about Texans who are NRA members and own semi-automatic rifles? Or maybe hemophiliacs?

              You really wouldn't assume that your acquaintance who is a Quaker and hemophiliac doesn't want to participate in your fight club? Really?

              Look, even the most racist KKK member is going to treat the very limited subset of people they interact with as individuals and not make assumptions about them based on a single characteristic. Heck, a couple of his buddies down at the plant are probably black You don't win any brownie points for that. The specific case always overrides the general.

              And not being able to speak of a group of people who share a common characteristic as if they were a group of people sharing a common characteristic is silly.

        2. Suthenboy   9 years ago

          No, it is based on culture, not race, which is completely appropriate.

          1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

            Culture isn't some monolithic entity, either.

            1. Something   9 years ago

              Okay, define culture.

              1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

                Sorry, I should have been more clear. Sure, culture is defined by a set of common attributes shared by some group of people. But at the level of nations or even religions, it makes no sense to speak of a single culture.

                Even at a more granular level you run into problems. Black culture isn't just one thing. Libertarian culture isn't just one thing (just look at these boards). You can identify with multiple different cultures, each to varying degrees. Perhaps you could define Black or Libertarian culture to be a single thing in some academic sense, but individual people are going to deviate from that to varying degrees, even if they nominally belong to that particular group.

                Now I'll readily admit that *everyone* makes judgements about people they don't know very well based on fairly broad characteristics. So if someone comes up to me and says they are libertarian, or Muslim, then I'm going to pretty much instantaneously be predisposed to think certain things about them. Is that some sort of -ism? Maybe. It's also human nature.

                But when you start to ignore the capacity of that individual to deviate from your assumptions, when you start to treat them better or worse than they deserve, and certainly when you start to formulate rules and laws based on those broad characteristics - that's when you enter into bad territory.

        3. Free Society   9 years ago

          He's made disparaging remarks about large groups of people based on their ethnicity or national origin. Maybe it's some other -ism. It's definitely collectivist.

          If that's your fast and loose definition of collectivism boy have I got some racist, jingoist, sexist, or maybe some kind of other -ism for you.

          1 in 5 American Muslims say violence against Americans is totally cool jihad stuff.

          25% of Muslim-Americans say that violence against Americans in the United States is justified as part of the "global Jihad (64% disagree).

          Oh shit I just made disparaging remarks about large groups of people based on their ethnicity or national origin. Don't collectivize me brah!

          1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

            No, you cited the results of a survey. Is it really that difficult to understand the difference between "some fraction of group x believes bad things" and "group x is evil" or "we should discriminate against group x because of what some of them believe" or "the beliefs of group x are inherently violent"?

            1. Cyto   9 years ago

              Here's the argument:

              Hypothetical world factual assumption: 3% of immigrants from Sicily are members of an organized crime syndicate. 0.002% of overall immigrants are members of an organized crime syndicate. Immigrants from Sicily make up less than 5% of the total immigrant population.

              Because of this set of facts, it is proposed that immigrants from Sicily undergo additional scrutiny during the vetting process.

              The counter argument of "treating them as a group, rather than as individuals is evil!" has a consequence. Because applying an added layer of scrutiny to all immigrants would result in a 20-fold increase in the cost of the added scrutiny vs scrutinizing the subset, while only marginally increasing safety, nobody gets effective additional scrutiny.

              You could make the same argument about any identifier. The valid argument isn't "treat everyone as individuals". It is "is this a valid identifier?" (Like "all rapists are men, therefore... ) and "is it useful in the proposed context?" the final piece would be "is the proposed solution a significant burden on people's rights? (i.e. because rape is a big problem, we are going to DNA fingerprint all males at birth and require that all males get permission from the local constable before engaging in sexual relations)

              I'm not weighing in on Trump's side, because I don't honestly know what his position is. I think maybe he is calling for added scrutiny for Muslims from certain countries. But who knows for sure?

          2. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

            It's racist if you apply those statistics to a particular Muslim without bothering to check whether they apply to him or her.

            1. Free Society   9 years ago

              When formulating policies that pertain to large groups such as immigration policy, it's not irrelevant and the height of naivete to ignore the trends among and between groups. Yes, a "group" is an abstract concept, an artificial categorization but if the correlations and trends among members of those groups are strong and related, it's reasonable to discuss them as a group and to formulate policies on that basis.

            2. Something   9 years ago

              Is it sexist for insurance companies to assess risk based off trends or is there an exception written into your kindergartener's view of reality?

              1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

                Of course that's sexist. You assume that I somehow object to that. I am simply being true to definitions.

          3. Eric Bana   9 years ago

            CSP is not credible.

      2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        The thing about the Indiana judge of Mexican heritage was straight-up racist.

        1. DJF   9 years ago

          Including his links to the Mexican organization "La Raza" (The Race)

          1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

            He was a member of a lawyers' association of that name, not the immigration group. This is something Trumpanzees willfully ignore.

            Second, Trump has retweeted white nationalists repeatedly. Again, another thing Trumpanzees ignore.

            1. VG Zaytsev   9 years ago

              Right, and the white citizens council of LA that David duke led was totally different than the Ku klux klan. It didn't even have any of those 3 words in it's name.

              1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

                You're conflating a professional association with a white supremacist group.

                Voluntary association in both cases, but different beasts altogether.

                1. Yusef Adama   9 years ago

                  So an Association Named The Race is OK as long as the are Lawyers?
                  GTFO

                  1. Marty Comanche   9 years ago

                    The La Raza ties were a post hoc justification for Trump's comments. Trump started by noting that the man was "we believe, a Mexican." Once that blew up, his sycophants started scrambling to hand wave away the racism.

                    Also, yes, if you're translating La Raza literally, it means The Race. It's a fairly common way for Latinos to refer to themselves. Sort of like how countless ethnic groups around the world call themselves "the people" in their native languages. Beyond that, the possessive is used less in Spanish than it is in English. So, in Spanish, you don't wash your hands. You wash the hands (se lava las manos). Does that mean that nobody else has hands or that other people's hands are somehow inferior? Nope. Just a feature of the language.

                    1. kbolino   9 years ago

                      La Raza is most definitely a racist organization. There's nothing lost in translation. If a bunch of lily white people formed an organization called "The Race" nobody but their apologists would have any doubt about their intentions.

            2. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

              I hate Trump, for a lot of good reasons, but he's been treated unfairly for these incidents.

              1.The lawyer's association is related to the immigration group. It is fully in in the Donald's right to question his impartiality. The bullshit part is in the timing, because the Donald caused the issue by his statements made after already being involved in a case with the judge.

              2. If you believe Trump vets his tweets before they go out, I've got some nifty Ron Paul newsletters for ya.

              Trump is a statist, crony, world-class bull-shitter; but he doesn't always get a fair shake from the press. That happens when you choose not to put a (D) after your name (which he easily could have done).

              1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

                Trump is a statist, crony, world-class bull-shitter; but he doesn't always get a fair shake from the press

                All true, and I don't know if he actually believes much of anything that he says. But he has done pretty good job of (intentionally, I think) playing off of some of the more bigoted attitudes that some people have in this wink-wink, nod-nod, "I'm not saying, I'm just saying" sort of way. That's not the entirety of his appeal, and I do not think that everyone who supports Trump is secretly racist and motivated by fear. But it takes some willful ignorance to deny that those things haven't been a part of his campaign.

              2. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

                Hence, "The stuff he's saying is just incendiary. It's racist."

            3. ULOST   9 years ago

              Lookie here Injun,

              "He was a member of a lawyers' association of that name, not the immigration group."

              And the liars association by the name of "The Race" was about what exactly? Perhaps the La Raza mission statement could she some light; however, these are fucking lawyers we are talking about. Think they are too stupid to try and create some artificial barrier between the 2 racist organizations. You come off as supremely stupid and/or supremely disingenuous. Take your picks.

              Keep your bitter clinging to your projected racism. Check out Drudge today where Trump insisted on inclusion of Jews and blacks at his golf course back in the 90's.

              1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

                Injun's milkshake brings all the Trumpalos to the yard.

              2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

                Keep your bitter clinging to your projected racism.

                So if I join The IndUS Entrepreneurs group, would that make me racist?

                What about frats? If I join one, does that make me sexist?

                If I were to start a group "Indians on Top" organization advocating Indo-supremacy, yeah sure. That's a different story.

                I agree with some of the commenters that Trump doesn't get a fair shake from the media sometimes. I also think that the Left has a LOT of innate racism which it is smart to not overtly talk about.

                But that doesn't excuse what Trump said about the judge not being able to do his job based on his race.

                Also, remember Justice Vaughn Walker? The Prop 8 crowd called for his recusal because he is gay and supposedly couldn't treat the case fairly.

            4. Slammer   9 years ago

              The media spent weeks and weeks saying "Trump is racist towards Mexicans"".

              Trump says, "Hey, this guy is Mexican, I may not get a fair hearing"

              Media says, "OMGZ SEE?? SO RACIST!"

      3. commoditous   9 years ago

        Honestly, I'm a bit disappointed in the #NeverTrump crowd about the supposed racism of Donald Trump. The guy's a misanthropic narcissist, but he's not a bigot. He's too dumb and far too inconsistent to be any sort of racist. The idea that he's some sort of supremacist or nationalist is laughable, too. He's a trust fund kiddo who swindled his way out of and into fortunes. He's what you'd expect a Kennedy would be if the Kennedys never got into politics. So to call Trump racist completely misses the point. Trump is just a gibbering asshole who shoots from the hip. He's not even "un-PC" or politically irreverent or "calling it like it is" or whatever, because that would require a bit of philosophical self-reflection. He's a moron. Full stop. So when the fogies at NRO start tut-tutting about Trump meandering his way into another appalling verbal train wreck, it's just trite. Staaaaahhhhhhp. They're blue-haired schoolmarms pretending to be the cosmopolitan progressive vanguard of the right. STAAAAAHP.

        1. commoditous   9 years ago

          Trump is sui generis in the sense that he does not fall into the paradigmatic left-right binary that circumscribes the American body politic. Or rather, he too starkly, almost preposterously, embodies what the left thinks of the right-wing Bull Connor-style populist bigot, which means he's an unreformed old-school Democrat. Nobody in the political elite says or even thinks the sort of bullshit he spouts off on the regular, not because it's become passe or politically unacceptable but because none of that shit really means anything. Close off the border? We already have a lavishly-funded bureaucracy, a couple of them in fact, tasked with that very thing. Good fucking luck getting them to do their jobs. The idea of building a wall is appealing to idiots, but not reality. Shutting off migration from Muslim countries is appealing to idiots, too, but again, reality is just not all that impressed: most of the atrocities we see are home-grown, terrorist groupies ending their lives in inglorious blazes. To the extent that we probably oughtn't import unassimilable peasants from the third world, well, that's not exactly a novel idea on the right. I doubt a Cruz or even Rubio administration would sign off on any sort of mass-importation plan.

          But I can see Trump doing it in a fit of pique if he thought it served his purposes, or whatever passes for a purpose at the moment.

          1. commoditous   9 years ago

            Everything else is a grab bag of big-government, anti-capitalist drivel. And this is supposed to be the Great White Hope of the "shrinking" American middle class. Goddamn, could they have found a less competent or capable leader? They wanted to stick it to Republican establishment, whatever that even means, and found a big, burly bear who's going to stick it in them. It's like punishing your wife by finding the meatiest gay biker you can to fuck you in front of her. Cuckservative indeed. You remember that ATHF episode when Carl is regularly getting reamed by Hand Banana, so he breeds his own Island of Dr. Moreau horrorshow to rape Hand Banana, and ends up getting raped by the both of them? That's the Trump base. Good luck with that, you dumb idiots.

            1. commoditous   9 years ago

              Clinton would be the Hindenburg-sized maraschino cherry on top of Obama's sundae. She would put the sour taste of failure in the mouths of voters for a generation. She would indelibly blight progressivism by revealing it for the corrupt, catastrophic mentality it's always been. History is strewn with failed socialist experiments, and the breed of West-hating multiculturalism (which in reality is monocultural or rather piecemeal cultural since every ethnicity is carefully sectioned off in its own discrete bin and never shall two intersect (and intersectionalism is another bullshit term that means the opposite of what it postulates, and that's being rather generous with the word)), that she represents is actively helping destroy prosperity. You're worried about income inequality? At least you're not eating rock stew like Venezuelans. (And what do we count as income? And how do we categorize inequality? How do you compare working wages with investment returns? Or a trade skill like plumbing with a Harvard education? Does the writer at NRO who studied classical Romantic literature and reviews operas on the side owe a part of his earnings to a meth-addicted dummy in Arkansas or a Racialism Studies major in Seattle? There's another susbtance-free populist politician for you, Bernie fucking Sanders, king of the stuttering platitudes for socialist murderers. A big good job for the left there, too, you dumb fucking idiots.)

              1. Cyto   9 years ago

                Why is it that the only people who agree with me that Trump is just a narcissistic idiot and not some embodiment of any other sort of evil are the sort of people who post rambling 5,000 word posts in a message board?

                In other words, why don't normal people understand that this guy is just an idiot and quit paying attention to (and voting for) the idiot?

                1. commoditous   9 years ago

                  It takes a narcissist to spot a narcissist, and narcissism at its heart is a symptom of self-loathing. Once you learn to doubt your own perspicacity you can't help but recognize the fallibility of others, self-described experts and robustly confident demagogues alike. It breeds cynicism in some and sociopathy in others. Trump is manifestly the latter.

                  1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

                    It takes a narcissist to spot a narcissist, and narcissism at its heart is a symptom of self-loathing posting at Reason.

                    1. Cyto   9 years ago

                      Thank you reasonoids. As always, insightful and depressing.

        2. Rasilio   9 years ago

          The thing is that he does not have to be a racist personally for the things he says to be racist.

          I agree that on a personal level Trump isn't racist, I suspect like most business men he doesn't give a fuck what color your skin is, what part of the globe you come from, or who you pray to, he cares about what you can do for him and to him (as in, are you a threat to his plans), that however does not prevent him from expressing racist thoughts nor is it required that a racist motivation be behind a policy which would be inherently racist in it's application.

          1. commoditous   9 years ago

            Exactly yes. There's a particular motive and philosophy that supremacists and even casual racists hold, and neither of those are words you'd ascribe to Trump in any capacity. He is an emotive being, the purest embodiment of knee-jerk reactionary do-somethingism ever witnessed in American politics. So he occasionally stumbles into verboten racialist rhetorical mires, and it's not because he is a racist but because those words exist and somehow found their way into his vocabulary and tumbled out of his mouth in that particular order like a the work product of an infinite troop Shakespearean-sonnet hammering baboons. And then the brilliant idiots at NRO et al. hammer out thousand-word-long screeds complaining about the dumb ape's racism as if that's the problem and not the fact that he's a content-free dumbass appealing to the baser instincts of other dumbasses who bypass all higher-order cognitive functions and reach deep down into their medulla oblongatas for their political pr?cis.

            1. Cyto   9 years ago

              As I said before, why is it that nobody else can see this? It is blindingly obvious to me, yet people seem to want to imbue this thing with all sorts of thoughts, beliefs and capabilities that are far beyond its capacity.

              The first time I saw him speak at length on "The Apprentice" I immediately remarked that he was an idiot. He had this incredible ability to evaluate a situation and not only come to the wrong conclusion, but completely fail to comprehend what the important issues were and how they fit together. Instead, he would unfailingly pluck some irrelevant detail from the morass and hold it forth as the lightbringing truth.

              Add this mental disability with a knee-jerk counter-attack at the tiniest perceived slight and you've got the robo-Trump tweet-fest we live with today.

              Yet people vote for him. And get all riled up and protest him. WTF people? You ignore the village idiot. You don't enter real estate deals with him, or engage him in political debate.

      4. Zeb   9 years ago

        I'd say some of his comments about Mexicans could fairly be called racist. Though we could argue about whether Mexican should really be considered a race.

        "Racism" might not be the best word for collectivist bigotry against an ethnic or religious group, but it's how people are using the word.

    2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      My MIL called me a racist this past week-end...for merely making poor comments about the Mayor of Montreal and Trudeau. 'Do you like anyone? It's racist!'

      I'm telling you, there's no come back for that. At least her daughter gave her the look of 'are you insane?'

      The scourge of progressivism even impacts the older generation. Which is why I've come to hold them in low regard and loathe them.

      1. Get To Da Chippah   9 years ago

        It's easy when 'racist' has come to mean 'disagrees with a progressive idiot on anything.'

      2. Rich   9 years ago

        'Do you like anyone? It's racist!'

        What Makes America Canada Great?

        It's candied apples and ponies with dapples
        you can ride all day!
        It's girls with pimples
        And cripples with dimples
        that just wont go away !
        Its spics and wops and niggers and kikes
        with noses as long as your arm!
        Its micks and chinks and gooks and geeks
        and honkies
        (Honk! Honk!)
        who never left the farm!

        1. Rich   9 years ago

          Oh, props to Firesign Theatre.

        2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

          For once, I would love not to be the punchline.

          1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

            You come to the wrong place for sympathy.

            Look in the dictionary, right between 'shit' and 'syphilis'.

      3. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        I was accused of being a racist for using the word "illegals" instead of "illegal immigrants". This is how the Left shuts down debate.

        Disagree on income "inequality"? You're a heartless bastard.

        Disagree on the so-called wage gap? You're a sexist.

        They put you on a defensive posture where you have to justify not being a certain label while the actual debate is effectively sidetracked.

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          They put you on a defensive posture where you have to justify not being a certain label while the actual debate is effectively sidetracked.

          ^This. The left does not want a debate. They just want to shout-down their opponents.

        2. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

          You're not allowed to call them "illegal immigrants", either. They're to be referred to as "undocumented migrants" or some such.

          Cis-racist shitlord.

          Where is Irish, anyway?

        3. Zeb   9 years ago

          I'm not a big fan of "illegals". To general. We are all probably "illegals" in some sense (how many laws have you broken today).

          But, yeah. They don't want an argument. They want a club to beat you with.

          1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

            Agree that with 3 felonies a day, we are all illegals in some sense.

            I used "illegal" as a short for "illegal immigrant". There are quite a few examples of such usage in modern parlance.

            I did chafe that person by not using "undocumented immigrant".

            1. Zeb   9 years ago

              Yeah, "illegals" is common enough informal usage. I find myself using it from time to time.

      4. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

        What do you expect from her? You fouled her daughter with your seed.

        1. SugarFree   9 years ago

          "Rick, I don't like glowing rocks in the kitchen trash!"

          "Well, I don't like your unemployed genes in my grandchildren, Jerry, but life is made of little concessions."

          1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

            New episodes could be coming end of July!

        2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

          IT'S A SEED?!

          1. Free Society   9 years ago

            If you give her too much seed, watermelons will grow in her vagina.

      5. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        Is your MIL a MILF?

        1. Swiss Servator   9 years ago

          *waves Crusty over*

      6. Zeb   9 years ago

        The scourge of progressivism even impacts the older generation. Which is why I've come to hold them in low regard and loathe them.

        Yeah. Fuck old people.

  7. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    something, something boner

    Man wearing skeleton costume, 2 others steal erectile dysfunction drugs from Alabama pharmacy

    Three men ? one wearing a skeleton costume ? burglarized two Dadeville pharmacies on June 25 stealing thousands of dollars' worth of erectile dysfunction medication.

    Dadeville police have released images of the suspects and their getaway vehicle in hopes of identifying them, according to Central Alabama Crime Stoppers.

    The burglaries took place at Lakeshore Pharmacy and Lake Martin Pharmacy at between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. on Saturday, June 25, police said.

    1. Cdr Lytton   9 years ago

      Skeletons just want to bone.

  8. Bee Tagger   9 years ago

    Donald Trump has reportedly drawn up a vice presidential short list.

    How can it be yuge and short, tell me that.

    1. bacon-magic   9 years ago

      It's like a tuna can. *walks away whistlin'

  9. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    The stuff he's saying is just incendiary. It's racist.

    I guess Hillary's got Gay Jay's vote.

  10. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Fence-climbing alligator caught on camera at Florida country club

    Eric Gilbert posted a video to YouTube showing the approximately 8-foot-long alligator making quick work of the chain-link fence at the Hideaway County Club in Fort Myers and crawling between the top of the fence and its barbed wire.

    Gilbert told WINK-TV the gator is known as Tom to regulars and makes frequent appearances.

    He said the video solved the mystery of Tom's entrances and exits.

    "I didn't know they could jump straight over a fence," he said.

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      They didn't survive this long by being stupid and unadaptive.

      1. Chip Woodier   9 years ago

        Was it running from a cop? I would tend to be faster and more agile, too. Evolution in action.

      2. Mr Lizard   9 years ago

        And yet somehow you mammals are still around...

        1. bacon-magic   9 years ago

          We breed like mammals...

      3. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        Alligators have been reported using tools. They will balance a stick on their snout while they hide just underwater. When a bird comes to grab the stick to build their nest, chomp!

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          That is scary. Not sure it quite counts as a tool, but it's close enough to still be scary.

    2. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

      Stealing American alligator jobs.

    3. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      People who don't live in alligator country find most of the stories about alligators hard to believe.

      Come stay at my house a while. You will change your mind pretty fast.

      1. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

        Party at Suthen's!

      2. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

        Are alligators fair game? Or are they endangered or not allowed to be hunted?

        1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

          Never mind, dummies. I looked it up. It looks like they sell out on permits, which means they need to print more permits.

          1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

            Look at you, the Janet Yellin of gators.

            1. Swiss Servator   9 years ago

              *applause*

  11. Rich   9 years ago

    The NASA space probe Juno is now orbiting Jupiter.

    I was watching NASA TV during the insertion last night.
    NASA's public relation's stuff is pretty polished.
    No wonder it's a $1.1B mission. 😉

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      Mmmm...the PR chick who was on when I was watching actually seemed kind of clueless. Of course she could just be playing dumb and feeding them the questions which a low-information viewer or reporter might be embarrassed to ask.

      1. Rich   9 years ago

        Sure, some of that was going on. If they aimed it just at the technogeeks where would the new STEM majors come from?

    2. CE   9 years ago

      It was pretty boring TV. If they were really into public relations, they would have had a live HD color video feed from Juno. How many days/weeks until the pictures show up? And I don't count the blurry video of Jupiter and the 4 moons you could have taken from your back yard with an 8 inch telescope.

  12. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Experience: I inject myself with snake venom

    I moved to London in 1987 and got a job unpacking tarantulas, cobras and rattlesnakes for a business that supplied animals to zoos and universities. It was my dream job, because I had access to all the snakes I wanted. I started taking venomous snakes home, so I could inject their venom, which my boss didn't mind.

    The first time I milked a snake, I used a green tree viper and injected myself using some 0.5ml syringes from the chemist. It was very scary: there was bruising and swelling all over my arm after I put the tiniest drop of venom into a small incision.

    That was 28 years ago, and I've been injecting myself ever since, every couple of days. For me, it's like drinking coffee: it's an energy boost. I haven't had a cold or a bout of flu in 13 years.

    1. Idle Hands   9 years ago

      nope.

      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

        I haven't had a cold or a bout of flu in 13 years.

        Zombies don't get sick. Duhhh!

    2. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

      I've seen bottles of liquor with cobras inside. Never had a chance to try it, but I'd give it a shot.

      1. bacon-magic   9 years ago

        Most snakes have venom, which can be ingested, it requires getting into the bloodstream to harm you.

      2. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        I used to drink snake wine when I was younger. It's popular in Tennessee and I knew some people from there. The way you make it is to drown a rattlesnake in a tub of bourbon.

        1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

          If it didn't burn on the way down, you wouldn't know it was bad for you.

    3. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

      It could come in handy if you ever end up in a battle of wits to win the princess.

  13. Idle Hands   9 years ago

    Huma Abedin admits that Clinton burned daily schedules.

    Hillary Clinton's closest aide revealed in a deposition last week that her boss destroyed at least some of her schedules as secretary of state ? a revelation that could complicate matters for the presumptive Democratic nominee, who, along with the State Department she ran, is facing numerous lawsuits seeking those public records.

    Huma Abedin was deposed in connection with a Freedom of Information Act lawsuit into Clinton's emails ? but her admission could be relevant to another lawsuit seeking Clinton's schedules.

    "If there was a schedule that was created that was her Secretary of State daily schedule, and a copy of that was then put in the burn bag, that?.?.?. that certainly happened on?.?.?.?on more than one occasion," Abedin told lawyers representing Judicial Watch, the conservative organization behind the emails lawsuit.

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      You do NOT want to know what "burn bag" is a euphemism for.

      1. Swiss Servator   9 years ago

        *opera applause*

      2. Tonio   9 years ago

        It's an actual thing - a desginated bag in which you put material to be burned/shredded. They used to be paper grocery-style sacks with a decorative pattern on them - no "burn bag" lettering or anything to specifically indicate what they were. A newly-hired coworker once grabbed one to cover some papers he was walking to another building on a rainy day. He couldn't figure out why everyone was staring at him like he was a madman until he got to his destination and got chewed out by the compliance officer. Good times.

        1. Drake   9 years ago

          I was a Radio Operator in a Marine battalion HQ. Our burn bag was just a paper bag were we stuck all our radio messages. Once or twice a day our Communications Gunny would take it outside and burn it.

        2. Citizen X   9 years ago

          Me: "Hey Tonio, why did the chicken cross the road?"
          Tonio: "Actually, chickens don't like the feel of asphalt on their feet, so they typically don't cross roads. If one did, though, it was probably really hungry and saw something to eat on the other side. Probably grain of some kind. Chickens like grain."

          Me: "Hey Tonio, knock knock."
          Tonio: "Oh good, i was expecting something from Amazon."

          Me: "So, a priest, a rabbi, and a hooker walk into a bar..."
          Tonio: "They must have been thirsty."

          1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

            Give Tonio one of those bags, because he just got BURNED.

          2. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

            That was pretty good. Nice to see Citizen X is pulling his weight.

          3. Tonio   9 years ago

            You can all kiss my butt.

        3. some guy   9 years ago

          Sounds like the new guy wasn't properly trained. I blame the compliance officer.

      3. bacon-magic   9 years ago

        Rug burn?

    2. Rich   9 years ago

      A lawyer for Judicial Watch asked: "And during your tenure at the State Department, were you aware of your obligation not to delete federal records or destroy federal records?"

      "Sure, but I was working for Hillary, so WTF."

      The photo at the link is pretty good.

      1. some guy   9 years ago

        The photo at the link is pretty good.

        Dementia is a hell of a disease. How does Huma keep her looking so nice all the time.

        1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

          Tongue grooming.

          1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

            *Gags up hair-ball*

    3. BigT   9 years ago

      Destroying official records is a crime. Hillary should really get in trouble....

      Oh, nevermind.

    4. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

      Just the occasions when she hosted a roundtable with House of Saud, management of the Clinton Foundation, and some arms manufacturers.

  14. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

    Brexit advocate Nigel Farage is resigning from his role as leader of the UK Independence Party.

    I guess now we have at least one name that's on Trump's short list.

    1. cavalier973   9 years ago

      As long as Farage wasn't born in Canada, he's good.

  15. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

    Vaffanculo, low-carbers! Italian researchers say pasta isn't fattening

    Researchers at Istituto Neurologico Mediterraneo Neuromed I.R.C.C.S. said their findings suggest pasta consumption is associated with a lower body mass index, or BMI.

    After reviewing the data from two significant epidemiological studies, researchers determined that pasta consumption was not linked to a higher rate of obesity. They found the opposite.

    1. Slammer   9 years ago

      I never get in on those kinds of studies 🙁

    2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      This is fucking retarded. I learned how to eat in Italy right down on how to eat gelato and drink espresso.

      Italians don't eat pasta like we do here (well, it's changed somewhat over the years) in that they don't drown the pasta in sauces in deep dishes with four meatballs.

      It's part of an overall meal. Light on the sauce and small portions.

      The Italians for a long-time were among the least obese in Europe. But I've seen stats showing it's changing - so it's not the fricken pasta. There's probably more to it.

      1. You Sound Like a Prog (MJG)   9 years ago

        It's almost always a matter of portions. Slathering on shitty sauce with added sugar doesn't help, but you tell a typical American that eating pasta will make him slim, and he assumes that means eating 4-5 cups of pasta in a meal.

    3. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

      If there is a problem with pasta, some carb-friendly nutritionists say, is that it's too often a vehicle for overly salty, sugary, fatty sauces.

      Dueling studies!

      The only thing that is definitely not shrinking is the amount of research dollars to prove everyone's invested theory. Maybe we should all let them get on with it, and just eat what we like. Keep doing exactly that if you lose weight; stop doing that if you gain. Eventually they'll let us know what's best for us, just as soon as they decide what that is.

    4. Dark Lord of the cis   9 years ago

      The results from my completely unscientific study show the opposite. I stopped eating sugar and wheat in January and I've lost 80 lbs so far. Take that science!

      1. egould310   9 years ago

        Damn bro. 80 lbs? Are you exercising as well?

        1. Dark Lord of the cis   9 years ago

          Just started lifting again last week.

  16. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Women will have more sex with robots than men by 2025 with 'robophilia' set to relegate romance

    Futurologist Dr Ian Pearson has compiled a report on the future of sex - where he suggests that sleeping with robots will be as common for women as watching porn is today.

    Sex with robots isn't exactly new though - and there are already a wide range of mechanical partners for humans out there.

    Footage, shared by Super Deluxe , was filmed in the Real Doll factory, and throws new light on the industry standard sex toys.

    Thanks to new developments, the pleasure aids have undergone a renaissance recently, with more than ever turning to them in lieu of human company when they have intimate thoughts.

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      Pshh. We've all seen that website, man.

    2. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      Quick, somebody find the video of "Electro-Ghonnorhea : The Noisy Killer"

    3. Slammer   9 years ago

      "Customers who bought demolition hammers also bought..."

    4. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      "...he suggests that sleeping with robots will be as common for women as watching porn is today."

      So, they won't be having sex with robots. I could have told you that.

    5. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

      Doubtful. Women are more into the intimacy and the human connection than dudes, so robo stud better be a good nuzzler and cuddler, and pay her nice compliments that seem genuine. Robostud's sister, on the other hand, will be getting way more action than real-live women. I expect she will require maintenance much more frequently than her sibling.

    6. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

      Obviously, those sexbots are gonna need lawyers. What are divorce lawyers going to do and family courts going to do?

    7. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

      Robotics is making great strides in head nodding technology.

  17. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

    Saudi Arabia was hit by three separate suicide attacks in a 24-hour period, including one attack in the Islamic holy site of Medina.

    But what was to blame, their bomb culture, their lack of diversity or their Islamophobia?

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      White men with guns?

    2. Princess Trigger   9 years ago

      Might be homophobia.
      Send Lynch - "most effective" weapon at America's disposal against Islamic terrorism is "love." - to assist in the fight.

      1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        Love of blowing shit up!

    3. Doctor Whom   9 years ago

      Christianity and Republicanism, duh. [/my Facederp feed]

      1. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

        Galileo was so wrong, poor guy, but he wasn't to know. The entire universe actually orbits around a country that didn't even exist when he was alive. What a cruel trick of science.

    4. Free Society   9 years ago

      But what was to blame, their bomb culture, their lack of diversity or their Islamophobia?

      Since diversity means less people of European ancestry they're nearly 100% diverse. So that can't be the problem.

    5. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

      Guns, Republicans, tea baggers, global warming, Christians, capitalism, and guns.

  18. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    re: Nigel Farage

    He said the party was "in a good position" following the EU referendum and that his political ambition had been achieved.

    "I came into this struggle from business because I wanted us to be a self-governing nation, not to become a career politician," Farage said.

    "During the referendum campaign I said I want my country back. What I'm saying today is I want my life back."

    *applauses*

    1. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

      Call Guinness!

      Man actually leaves politics under his own volition.

    2. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

      Wow, much respect.

    3. chipper me timbers   9 years ago

      He also addressed the EU parliament after the Brexit with "I know virtually none of you have ever done a proper job in your lives or worked, worked in a business or worked in a trade.".

      Much props.

  19. The Fusionist   9 years ago

    Class-action settlement: The company which runs several dating sites, including Christian Mingle, has agreed not to ask if their customers are men seeking women or women seeking men, but instead to expands its services to gays and lesbians.

  20. Drake   9 years ago

    The meeting must have gone well...

    NY Times: Clinton Weighs Keeping Lynch as Attorney General if She Wins

    http://www.newsmax.com/Newsfro.....id/736943/

    1. BigT   9 years ago

      Bringing back the lynch? Isn't that racist?

      1. LynchPin1477   9 years ago

        It's a legitimate Irish surname, goddammit!

        1. SugarFree   9 years ago

          So then it's definitely super-racist.

    2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      Mutual back-scratching. This is ridiculous corruption, but she's a Democrat, so it's not.

      1. Atanarjuat   9 years ago

        I was wondering what Lynch was going to get in the deal.

        1. cavalier973   9 years ago

          She gets to keep living.

  21. Lee G   9 years ago

    The endless navel-gazing, it's... it's... beautiful

    Let's think of solving oppression as developing pain medication. Let's say that, as a thin person in a fatphobic society, on a scale from one to ten, you experience three pain points. If we only ever develop a pain medication that helps up to three pain points, you're saved! But what about everyone else?

    Contrarily, if we develop a pain medication that will relieve up to all ten pain points, then everyone benefits ? including you!

    So does it make more sense to focus our efforts on the people with three pain points, or the ones with ten? Does it make more sense to focus the body acceptance movement on thin people, who only experience the pain of fatphobic oppression to a degree, or on fat people, who receive the brunt of the oppression?

    Thin people wonder how body acceptance can be useful to them if it's heavily focused on fat people. The difference is that when body acceptance focuses on fat people, thin people benefit. When it's centered on thin people, fat people get left behind.

    1. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

      I have no earthly understanding what this means.

  22. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

    No kidding: Childless couples are happier

    The analysis of 22 industrialized countries found that the largest "happiness gap" between those who have kids and those who don't can be found in America.

    That's thanks to the dearth of workplace policies enabling employees of U.S. companies to have a more flexible schedule or take paid time off for illness, vacations or the birth of a child, the researchers said.

    "The United States, without any standard paid leave available to mothers or parents -- or any standard vacation or sick leave to support raising a dependent child -- falls strikingly behind all the other countries we examined in terms of providing for parents' happiness and overall well-being," said researcher Matthew Andersson. He is an assistant professor of sociology at Baylor University, in Waco, Texas.

    Get rid of your kids, couples with kids.

    1. Doctor Whom   9 years ago

      Do you want a government mandate to pay people to be happy and have kids, or are you a heartless monster?

    2. Jickerson   9 years ago

      Unless they've found a way to objectively measure happiness, this is just more social science garbage for the media to eat up. It doesn't matter what conclusion they reached.

    3. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      Pure horseshit.

      There is a very marked difference between people who have children and those who don't in my experience. No offense to childless people but I find them exponentially more self absorbed and proportionally less happy.

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        Depends on how old your kids are. I got a lot happier once both were sleeping through the night again.

        1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

          Wait until they start sleeping somewhere else.

          woot.

      2. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

        The article is an appeal to have more subsidized parental time off. Of course the study will produce this result.

      3. Zeb   9 years ago

        There are a lot of pretty damn self absorbed parents out there. And the ones who live their whole lives through their children who aren't any better.

        But I agree that people with kids (who aren't total losers or idiots) do seem to be pretty happy with being parents.

    4. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

      I've seen reports that reach the exact opposite conclusion.

    5. Zeb   9 years ago

      Well, this validates my life choices, so I'm going to believe it.

      What I really think, based on my own observations and some other studies I've heard about is that people with children are often less happy in an immediate, day-to-day sort of way, but often more happy and satisfied overall with their lives.

  23. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Trump's 'Pocahontas' attack rooted in Warren heritage issue

    The question of Warren's heritage has taken on a new life with speculation about whether Clinton may tap her as a running mate.

    Brown, a Trump supporter, has criticized Warren and recently suggested she take a DNA test ? tests that Cherokee Nation officials say are unreliable and don't determine one's tribe

    Warren has been firing back.

    "If Donald Trump thinks that by using Scott Brown's hate-filled attacks on my family he's going to shut me down, then he better think again," Warren said this year. "It didn't work before, and it's not going to work now."

    1. Tonio   9 years ago

      They, the Warren supporters, are weaseling big time on this. Note the wording: tests that Cherokee Nation officials say are unreliable and don't determine one's tribe

      The tests are only as reliable as the database of people who have been tested, iow they don't have enough Cherokees on file. But what they are not addressing is whether the test would detect whether she had any native American ancestry. Presumably all those people who walked across the land bridge from Siberia to Alaska have some common detectable genes.

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        And if she is 1/32nd Indian, or whatever she is supposed to be, she may well have no Indian DNA at all, let alone Cherokee. Unless there is a direct matrilineal connection to the Indian ancestor.

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          I was wondering exactly how that worked. Thanks.

          So, she has an excuse to not take the test and a plausible explanation if it doesn't show Indian DNA.

          1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

            Did I just hear you guys mention Indian DNA?

            1. Zeb   9 years ago

              "Native American" takes too long to type and it's too hard to keep track of the correct tribe names in every case.

      2. Azathoth!!   9 years ago

        yes--we can test to see if people have any neandertal DNA, but figuring out if Fauxcahontas is part indian is impossible......sure.

    2. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      It's not hate-filled, it's pointing out you're disingenuous. You made a ridiculous claim and you expect people to just take it?

    3. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

      Fucking Ancestry.com is running commercials where a lady discovers she is 26% Native American.

      Swab the cheek, Pocahontas.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        Hmmm...I wonder if they are subtly taunting Warren.

        1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

          Apparently, being as subtle as Trump doesn't work, so maybe something over the top is called for.

  24. Rich   9 years ago

    Donald Trump has reportedly drawn up a vice presidential short list.

    Robert Reich, Barbara Mikulski, the Ghost of Toulouse-Lautrec, ....

    1. (((Renegade)))   9 years ago

      Goddammit, I was ready with that one. Add Billy Barty and the third Munchkin from the left in the Lollipop Guild.

      Goddammit.

    2. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      If only the other two on that list had the good sense to be syphilis-riddled alcoholics.

      1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

        What proof do you have that they're not?

    3. VG Zaytsev   9 years ago

      Haven Monahan, NS Khan, Dirk Pitt

  25. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    NYT: Freedom, Fireworks and Brexit

    As Marine Le Pen, the leader of the National Front party in France, wrote recently in The Times, "The decision that the people of Britain have just made was indeed an act of courage ? the courage of a people who embrace their freedom."

    The trouble with that argument, like many others advanced by the Leave crowd in Britain ? as well as by Donald Trump's nativist legions in the United States and by the xenophobic parties across Europe ? is that it's wrong.

    The "Brussels" against which British voters rebelled is not the "absolute Despotism" that the authors of the Declaration of Independence broke with, but a bureaucracy answerable to 28 contentious governments that has never constrained British sovereignty in defense or fiscal policy, or in dealing with refugees from outside the E.U. And as the Britons will soon realize to their regret, they benefited handsomely from participating in a large common market.

    All that has been amply chronicled, along with the real motives behind the Leave vote (and the politically analogous Trump phenomenon): the sense among older, provincial, white voters that they are somehow being marginalized by globalization; a nostalgia for a simpler and often mythical past.

    You know who else was nostalgic for a simpler and often mythical past...

    1. Lee G   9 years ago

      Pete Seeger?

    2. Slammer   9 years ago

      Norman Rockwell?

      1. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

        Lew Rockwell?

    3. Tonio   9 years ago

      JRR Tolkein?

    4. Mr Lizard   9 years ago

      Skeletor?

    5. Citizen X   9 years ago

      Winston's mom?

    6. BigT   9 years ago

      Bruce Springsteen?

    7. Get To Da Chippah   9 years ago

      Sauron?

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        Nah, Sauron was an industrialist.

    8. Rich   9 years ago

      Donald Trump?

      *** ducks ***

    9. shutterdown   9 years ago

      Rolling Stone?

    10. Chipper Morning Wood   9 years ago

      National Association for the Advancement of Amobean Rights?

    11. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      You know who else was nostalgic for a simpler and often mythical past...

      The environmentalist crowd?

  26. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    A Prime Minister, a Referendum and Italy's Turn to Get Worried

    It's now a familiar refrain: A European prime minister calls a referendum, his job could be on the line and markets are getting worried.

    This time it's not Britain's David Cameron but Italy's Matteo Renzi, who has called a vote on an ambitious overhaul of the political system aimed at ending the country's unstable governments. If he loses, Renzi has promised to quit, an outcome that Citigroup Inc. called probably the biggest risk in European politics this year outside the U.K.

    The vote is expected in October, though it is already spooking investors and Italian bonds are once more under-performing their Spanish peers. The yield on 10-year Italian securities overtook those on similar-maturity Spanish debt for the first time in almost a year on June 27, a day after Spain's Acting Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy defied opinion polls to consolidate his position in a general election.

    1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      There is indeed discontent in Italy. Their finance guys are bright and don't suffer any delusions. As I mentioned in the other thread:

      If I'm the UK I go talk to Italy. Of the three largest economies on the continent, Italy is and always was the least hostile towards the UK.

      I've been reading Italy and Russia have been working on enhancing trade. I don't know the mechanics of how this may or may not interfere with EU rules but it's what I've been reading.
      report spam

      So why not the UK? Italians love Anglo-American stuff.

    2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      Italeave

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        More like Italeap!

        1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

          Itdafuckout?

  27. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

    A Model for 'Clean Coal' Runs Off the Tracks: A Mississippi project, a centerpiece of President Obama's climate plan, has been plagued by problems that managers tried to conceal, and by cost overruns and questions of who will pay.

    The Kemper coal plant is more than two years behind schedule and more than $4 billion over its initial budget, $2.4 billion, and it is still not operational.

    The plant and its owner, Southern Company, are the focus of a Securities and Exchange Commission investigation, and ratepayers, alleging fraud, are suing the company. Members of Congress have described the project as more boondoggle than boon. The mismanagement is particularly egregious, they say, given the urgent need to rein in the largest source of dangerous emissions around the world: coal plants.

    1. Mr Lizard   9 years ago

      Ya, coal gasification does not scale well. It might be commercially viable one day, but it is a pain in the ass way to make electrons

      1. BigT   9 years ago

        Ahem.

        Sasol's Secunda coal gasification plant is the largest in the world. It makes syngas (CO+H2) that is converted to a wide range of fuels and chemicals. When I visited they had 80 coal gasifiers, probably more now.

        Of course there are several small mountains of coal ash nearby that were produced in the plant.

        1. CatoTheChipper   9 years ago

          I've been there, too, and it's an impressive operation. However, SASOL is in the business of making fuel and petrochemical products, not politics. So, they are not uselessly separating CO2 from flue gas, cooling it, compressing it, pipelining it, and injecting it into geologic formations that must be monitored and maintained in perpetuity.

          Clean coal is a real thing if you're talking about real air pollution, but it's utter nonsense if you're talking about CO2.

        2. Princess Trigger   9 years ago

          I read that as Salusa Secundus.

          1. Free Society   9 years ago

            Which I always read as Salsa Secondus

    2. Aloysious   9 years ago

      Behind schedule and over budget? unpossible.

    3. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      and questions of who will pay.

      The government will!

  28. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Immigration reformers eye Gang of 8 revival

    Lindsey Graham doesn't sugarcoat his prediction: Republicans are going to get thrashed in the November election, especially among Latinos. And it's going to trigger another run at immigration reform in Congress next year, the South Carolina senator says.

    "I'll tell you what I'm going to do in 2017," the plainspoken GOP deal maker said in a recent interview. "I'm going to take the Gang of Eight bill out, dust it off and ask anybody and everybody who wants to work with me to make it better to do so."

    Graham isn't the only one eyeing a revival of the Gang of Eight, the bipartisan group of senators that shepherded a sweeping immigration bill through the Senate three years ago only to watch it stall in the House a year later. Propelled by a Republican establishment eager to make inroads with minority voters after losing them by steep margins in the 2012 election, it was the closest Congress came in a generation to overhauling the nation's immigration laws,

  29. Slammer   9 years ago

    Boobs, making the nightly news interesting again.

    In order to compete, one Albanian news network decided to show less in their news broadcasts. By "less," we're referring to clothing, because they hired a bunch of women to recite the news almost completely topless.

    1. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

      And now to motorboat today's top stories...

  30. Lee G   9 years ago

    She's so much fun at partiesy

    Kaitlyn M Forristal ?@k80mylady 13h13 hours ago

    I'll be ok with your flag gear & excessive PBR when you talk to me about decolonization. Talk to me about dismantling white supremacy.

    Kaitlyn M Forristal ?@k80mylady 13h13 hours ago

    I'm so over the consumerism-fueled faux patriotism that comes out for the fourth. Your 'merica trunks make you look like an ignorant ass.

    1. (((Renegade)))   9 years ago

      therapist, cat lady, feminist. Counselor Education & Supervision doctoral student. body positive. abortion zealot. fat.

      Says it all.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        abortion zealot

        Finally, a girl for Eddie!

        1. The Last American Hero   9 years ago

          Trying to get pregnant and then regretting your choice isn't something to be celebrated, even if you think it should be perfectly legal.

          1. Tonio   9 years ago

            And people here say *I* ruin jokes.

      2. Glide   9 years ago

        I enjoy how much unlikability she crammed into just a few words.

      3. tarran   9 years ago

        That's one really bitter therapist.

        Can you imagine how fucked up her clients will be once she finished pouring her insanity into their heads?

        1. Tonio   9 years ago

          She's not even a therapist - Counselor Education & Supervision. So she's training to train counselors. Those who can't do teach. Those who can't teach teach teachers. Etc.

          1. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

            There was a space missing; 'the rapist' is correct reading.

    2. Crusty Juggler   9 years ago

      Those founders and that liberty they desired. Ugh. FAT AND PROUD!

    3. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      Such deep intellectualism. My brother pulls that shit with us whenever he's around. They talk as if they learned a secret to a better life and achieved intellectual karma by saying such inane nonsense.

    4. SugarFree   9 years ago

      Here she is eating her weight in melted cheese and chocolate.

      1. tarran   9 years ago

        You lie!

        That can't be more than 2,000 calories there!

        1. SugarFree   9 years ago

          That's The Melting Pot fondue restaurant. She's dipping the things you can see in melted chocolate because brownies and cheesecake aren't body positive enough on their own.

      2. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

        Another tweet:

        Because right now, if you feel comfortable enough to wear an old glory bikini & talk about freedom, you're dripping in privilege.

        While she drips cheese out of her pores.

        1. Get To Da Chippah   9 years ago

          I'd rather be dripping in privilege than oozing insanity from every pore.

    5. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      My house was the only one in a 3-block radius to fly the US flag yesterday.

      A number of Americans don't appreciate America.

      1. Lee G   9 years ago

        I'd rather display the Constitution or DOI.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          FWIW I'm surrounded by Bernie Sanders yard signs. Fans of Norman Thomas.

          1. Citizen X   9 years ago

            My thoughts and prayers are with you.

      2. Zeb   9 years ago

        I'd much rather fly a Gadsden flag at this point. The US flag doesn't represent the good things about the country to me anymore. It represents the government, not the nation as far as I'm concerned.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          LOL. If I fly the Gadsden flag, my neighbors will call the cops on me.

          TERRORIST TEATHUGLIKKKAN!

      3. bacon-magic   9 years ago

        One of thes bright sides to LEGAL immigration is that these new Americans seem to be more patriotic and liberty loving then most of us.

        1. Zeb   9 years ago

          It is true of many immigrants, legal and illegal.

      4. cavalier973   9 years ago

        I read the DoI aloud to my family and guests yesterday. It is amusing to hear people comment on how similar the list of grievances is to how our government operates today.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          Did you take the Hillsdale College pledge to read the DoI?

    6. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

      149 Followers?

      Irrelevant.

  31. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

    3 reasons the American Revolution was a mistake

    I'm reasonably confident a world in which the revolution never happened would be better than the one we live in now, for three main reasons: Slavery would've been abolished earlier, American Indians would've faced rampant persecution but not the outright ethnic cleansing Andrew Jackson and other American leaders perpetrated, and America would have a parliamentary system of government that makes policymaking easier and lessens the risk of democratic collapse.

    1. Idle Hands   9 years ago

      And parliamentary democracies are a lot, lot better than presidential ones. They're significantly less likely to collapse into dictatorship because they don't lead to irresolvable conflicts between, say, the president and the legislature. They lead to much less gridlock.

      In the US, activists wanting to put a price on carbon emissions spent years trying to put together a coalition to make it happen, mobilizing sympathetic businesses and philanthropists and attempting to make bipartisan coalition ? and they still failed to pass cap and trade, after millions of dollars and man hours. In the UK, the Conservative government decided it wanted a carbon tax. So there was a carbon tax. Just like that. Passing big, necessary legislation ? in this case, legislation that's literally necessary to save the planet ? is a whole lot easier with parliaments than with presidential systems.

      This guy can go straight to fucking hell.

      1. Tornado16nb   9 years ago

        How does gridlock lead to dictatorship? if anything there is less.

        They can never explain why a carbon tax is needed....as in what will it even do as far as results and impact on climate.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          They can never explain why a carbon tax is needed.

          Feelings should be felt, not explained. You're ruining it, man.

        2. Elspeth Flashman   9 years ago

          I always think of gridlock as a good thing because it leads to less laws/legislative action overall = saving the freedoms, hopefully.

      2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

        "They're significantly less likely to collapse into dictatorship because they don't lead to irresolvable conflicts between, say, the president and the legislature. They lead to much less gridlock."

        Because the government agrees with itself more often in this system, this system is less likely to tend towards dictatorship.

        LOGIC!!

        1. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

          So many U.S. dictatorships over the past two centuries.

        2. Mickey Rat   9 years ago

          Authoritarianism by one man is bad. Authoritarianism by many men is good.

          Though I can see a glimmer of a point with the way Obama has been getting around gridlock by executive order and the Congress not defending or not being able to defend it's perogatives

      3. Spoonman.   9 years ago

        Isn't it the legislative branch preventing us from having a carbon tax in the United States currently? The GOP would have more power if we had a British-style parliamentary system here.

      4. Get To Da Chippah   9 years ago

        If the government can easily pass sweeping 'good' laws to save the planet, can't it just as easily pass sweeping laws to fuck it right up?

        Holy shit, the guy is an idiot.

        1. Tornado16nb   9 years ago

          You aren't taking to account they are TOP MEN

      5. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

        I would however, like Question Time here.

      6. R C Dean   9 years ago

        And parliamentary democracies are a lot, lot better than presidential ones. They're significantly less likely to collapse into dictatorship

        Maybe somebody who is more tuned into 20th Century history can tell us which, in fact, is less likely to become a dictatorship.

        1. Brett L   9 years ago

          Listen, RC, mistakes were made with regards to the filters for selecting TOP. MEN. Now that those have been addressed, that sort of thing can never happen again. /prog

        2. Brett L   9 years ago

          Listen, RC, mistakes were made with regards to the filters for selecting TOP. MEN. Now that those have been addressed, that sort of thing can never happen again. /prog

          1. Brett L   9 years ago

            Listen, squirrels. I will make sure you are the last to die, and that it is slow and painful when I am made God-Emperor of this world.

    2. BigT   9 years ago

      America would have a parliamentary system of government

      Ugh!!

    3. Spoonman.   9 years ago

      Didn't many states eschew the executive branch entirely shortly after the Revolution, and then decided that was stupid?

    4. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      "Slavery would've been abolished earlier,"

      Alternately, Slavery in Britain would simply have been abolished LATER. Who knows, with the profit of slavery in the south benefiting the Brits maybe they'd have been slower to abolish it themselves.

      "American Indians would've faced rampant persecution but not the outright ethnic cleansing Andrew Jackson and other American leaders perpetrated,"

      English policies inspired American ones, so this is probably false. I ASSUME here they are talking about the Proclamation Line as if the Line was inspired by benevolent feelings towards the Amerindians, but the Proclamation was just about creating a buffer-state between British territory and Britain's enemies...

      "America would have a parliamentary system of government that makes policymaking easier and lessens the risk of democratic collapse."

      Making policymaking easier increases the risk of democratic collapse.

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        When did Britain abolish slavery in their colonies? If I recall correctly, it was well after they did so in Britain itself.

      2. Zeb   9 years ago

        So 1833, but with some exceptions. So if we assume that the US would not have been another exception, then slavery might have ended in North America 30 years earlier. But they may well ahve made an exception there as it was so important to their trade in cotton and other things.

        1. Bill Dalasio   9 years ago

          But they may well ahve made an exception there as it was so important to their trade in cotton and other things.

          That was the very first thing that occurred to me. There would have been no way in hell the British textile mills of the time would have forgone one of their two primary sources of cotton. In India, you could go without it. You had a huge excess labor supply. In the Americas, there was a relative labor shortage.

          This guy is consistently one of the dumbest guys I've run across.

  32. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    Devastated Texas father speaks as daughters killed by their crazed mom are laid to rest: 'If you have loved ones, tell them you love them every day'
    ...She "had ample time" to shoot her estranged husband, but she "wanted him to suffer" watching her kill their children, Fort Bend County Sheriff Troy Nehls said at a Wednesday press conference....

    1. Idle Hands   9 years ago

      What a fucking terrible story.

      1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

        It makes me want to vomit.

        1. Rich   9 years ago

          NOW will you do something about gun violence?

          /prog

  33. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    'President Hillary Clinton?' She Wants Progress on Immigration and to Drink With G.O.P.

    In her first 100 days, she would also tap women to make up half of her cabinet in hopes of bringing a new tone and collaborative sensibility to Washington, while also looking past Wall Street to places like Silicon Valley for talent ? perhaps wooing Sheryl Sandberg from Facebook, and maybe asking Tim Cook from Apple to become the first openly gay cabinet secretary.

    Former President Bill Clinton would keep a low public profile, granting few interviews and avoiding any moves that could create headaches for his wife, like his recent meeting with Attorney General Loretta Lynch during the F.B.I.'s investigation into Mrs. Clinton's email practices.

    Mrs. Clinton would even schmooze differently than the past few presidents have. Not one to do business over golf or basketball, she would bring back the intimate style of former Presidents Ronald Reagan and Lyndon B. Johnson, negotiating over adult beverages. Picture a steady stream of senators, congressmen and other leaders raising a glass and talking policy in the Oval Office with her and her likely chief of staff, John D. Podesta, as her husband pops in with a quick thought or a disarming compliment.

    1. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

      What a compelling plot, with sympathetic characters. They should adapt it for the stage.

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        Same Obama blather about bipartisanship.

        It will all change once she's in office, at which point, it will be an Obama-style pen-and-phone authoritarianism.

    2. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      She'll give a position of power to the CEO of the objectively worst, least user-friendly tech company just because he's gay, and she'll be drinking and drunk on the job and will encourage intoxication in the rest of government too, presumably simply not meeting with any Muslim or Mormon senators or congressmen.

      1. Bill Dalasio   9 years ago

        Now, now. If you were Hillary Clinton you'd probably regularly drink yourself into a stupor. Just to get over the sad reality that you're Hillary Clinton.

    3. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

      she would also tap women

      The Pegger-in-Chief?

  34. Domestic Dissident   9 years ago

    Saudi Arabia was hit by three separate suicide attacks in a 24-hour period, including one attack in the Islamic holy site of Medina.

    So, the new "Arab Spring" comes home to the birthplace of the original "Arab Spring".

    Couldn't happen to a more lovely group of people (noooooot).

    1. Citizen X   9 years ago

      Noot? What's that a shitty nickname for?

      1. Domestic Dissident   9 years ago

        Your mom.

        1. Citizen X   9 years ago

          That's your cleverest retort yet. Did you have help writing it?

  35. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    Wife fights for share of ex's ?175,000 payout for child abuse: Estranged partner could make legal history after arguing money is a marital asset
    Andrew Kerslake received ?175,000 compensation for sex abuse as a child
    Ex-wife Helen Tippett, 41, is fighting for a share as part of divorce case
    She claims money is a marital asset and a win would make legal history
    But Mr Kerslake, 45, put money in a trust so it goes to charity when he dies

    1. Cdr Lytton   9 years ago

      Poor guy. Getting raped twice.

  36. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    Ex-wife sues former husband over compensation for the 24 years he spent in prison for crimes HE DIDN'T COMMIT!
    Steven Phillips was wrongly convicted of a string of sexual assaults he didn't commit
    DNA evidence cleared him of any wrongdoing in 2008
    As compensation for his time in prison, the state of Texas will pay him about $6million

  37. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    PC Europe Now Blaming Women for Provoking Muslim Rapists
    ...At first I was scared, but now I'm more angry than anything. After the attack they told me that women shouldn't be alone on the streets after 8:00 pm. And they also gave me other advice, telling me I should dye my hair dark and also not dress in such a provocative way.
    Indirectly that means I was partly to blame for what happened to me. That is a massive insult....

    1. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      The left now using the "she was asking for it" line. We haven't come full circle so much as everything is spinning out of control.

      1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

        Sickening, eh?

    2. Drake   9 years ago

      They really do not care about racial or gender equality, gay rights or any of the other shit they preach. Causing chaos and grabbing power is it for them.

      Milo has them pegged.

      http://www.breitbart.com/big-governme.....-everyone/

      1. Suthenboy   9 years ago

        ^This.

    3. Tonio   9 years ago

      not dress in such a provocative way

      US feminists are up in arms about this poor treatment of their European sisters, right?

      1. Drake   9 years ago

        Shhh. They adhere to a victomology hierarchy and their Molotov?Ribbentrop Pact with the Muslims. Nobody over there likes to talk about it.

        1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

          ^THIS.

    4. CatoTheChipper   9 years ago

      Quit hatin', Johnny, and put aside your racism and Islamophobia. The "victim" was a privileged, blonde European white woman. In the science of intersectionality, she has far fewer victim points than a male Muslim refugee.

  38. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    We're going to need a new rank

    1. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

      Is backward clothing becoming a thing? Again??

    2. Brett L   9 years ago

      I guess that outfit answers the question over whether xe stands or sits to urinate.

  39. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    Trump's Tight Game, A Series

  40. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

    As women are a considerable, or at least a pretty numerous part of company; and as their suffrages go a great way toward establishing a man's character in the fashionable part of the world (which is of great importance to the fortune and figure he proposes to make in it), it is necessary to please them.

    I will therefore, upon this subject, let you into certain Arcana that will be very useful for you to know, but which you must, with the utmost care, conceal and never seem to know.

    1. Longtorso, Johnny   9 years ago

      ...Women, then, are only children of a larger growth; they have an entertaining tattle, and sometimes wit; but for solid reasoning, good sense, I never knew in my life one that had it, or who reasoned or acted consequentially for four-and-twenty hours together. Some little passion or humor always breaks upon their best resolutions. Their beauty neglected or controverted, their age increased, or their supposed understandings depreciated, instantly kindles their little passions, and overturns any system of consequential conduct, that in their most reasonable moments they might have been capable of forming.

      A man of sense only trifles with them, plays with them, humors and flatters them, as he does with a sprightly forward child; but he neither consults them about, nor trusts them with serious matters; though he often makes them believe that he does both; which is the thing in the world that they are proud of; for they love mightily to be dabbling in business (which by the way they always spoil); and being justly distrustful that men in general look upon them in a trifling light, they almost adore that man who talks more seriously to them, and who seems to consult and trust them; I say, who seems; for weak men really do, but wise ones only seem to do it.

      -Lord Chesterfield in a letter to his son

      1. Citizen X   9 years ago

        Yeah, you're never getting laid.

        1. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

          That's not true. Just look at the article above about sex robots.

          1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

            There needs to be a 4th robot law for these cases.

            1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

              related:

              Longtorso on his wedding night

              1. Elspeth Flashman   9 years ago

                +1 robot sex voice.

  41. Thymirus   9 years ago

    http://www.foxnews.com/sports/.....cmp=hplnws

    Bald eagle briefly finds freedom on July 4 at Dodger Stadium

    A bald eagle has soared to freedom at Dodger Stadium on the Fourth of July.

    The male eagle was supposed to fly from the top of the stadium down to its handler Monday as part of the pregame festivities for Independence Day.

    Instead, the liberty-loving bird flew right on past its handler on the outfield grass and continued over the center field fence.

    It disappeared from view, prompting rumbles of laughter and concern from baseball fans.

    The eagle was one of a pair from the Los Angeles Zoo, which has sent eagles to Chavez Ravine for pregame flights in the past.

    1. egould310   9 years ago

      Keep flying, my raptor brother. I hope to spot you up in the Hollywood Hills one day. Maybe watch you snatch a small dog off a hiking trail, and feast at the top of a eucalyptus tree?

  42. Thymirus   9 years ago

    http://www.foxnews.com/politic.....cmp=hplnws

    Democrats plan more disruption on guns in House Tuesday

    The House of Representatives returns to legislative session Tuesday after a nearly two-week respite. Democrats are again planning a donnybrook over guns.

    The House first meets at noon for short speeches and then 2 p.m. for legislative business. No votes are planned until 6:30 p.m. But some Democrats plan to pick up with the firearms fight precisely where they left off in late June with an unprecedented sit-in on the House floor.

    Over the weekend, Fox News obtained a memo sent from the leadership of the Congressional Black Caucus (CBC).

    "Rep. Robin Kelly (D-IL) would like CBC members to be present for Floor activities on gun violence when the House returns to session on Tuesday, July 5, 2016," read the missive. "The plan is to be as disruptive to (House) Speaker (Paul) Ryan (R-WI) as possible next week."

    Ryan insists he won't "tolerate" more disruption. Ryan, his staff, other House GOP leaders, along with representatives from the House Sergeant at Arms Office and the Office of the Parliamentarian have discussed ways to quash additional dustups.

    1. Thymirus   9 years ago

      Hoplophobic prohibitionism requires ceaseless advertising, apparently.

    2. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      Sons of wh0res.

    3. R C Dean   9 years ago

      Ryan insists he won't "tolerate" more disruption.

      I'm sure he'll use the tried and true Republican method of shutting down Democrats by giving them everything they want. And maybe a little extra, for bipartisanship.

  43. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

    Rio police haven't been paid in a month and say they can't protect visitors.

    Between this, the ZIka, and the sewage dump also known as the local waters, why the hell did Rio get the Olympics again?

    1. Drake   9 years ago

      Because Boston wouldn't build them a palace or something? (I know, that was some future Olympic fiasco)

      1. tarran   9 years ago

        Rio got the one Fearless Leader was hoping to bring to Chicago. Rio won because it has a higher murder rate.

    2. Slammer   9 years ago

      Money?

    3. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

      Also, at least US-based athletes will feel at home around these cops.

      "It seems like there is an order [from authorities] to put fear in people so they stay calm, so they don't cause trouble in the city because the foreigners can't see that the city is chaotic," Higor da Silva, a resident of the Mare favela, told CNN.

      "They [state police] don't care if there is a child in the middle -- they shoot their target."

    4. Thymirus   9 years ago

      The officials responsible for the Olympics are as stupendously corrupt and retarded as the international soccer barons. Their selections and procedures are incomprehensible.

      1. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

        "incomprehensible"

        What's so hard to comprehend in the procedure of "Whoever gives us the most free stuff wins"??

    5. Domestic Dissident   9 years ago

      Because they offered the biggest bribe, which is all that really matters.

    6. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      You need to ask? Dude, Qatar got the World Cup.

      Nothing surprises me anymore.

      1. Drake   9 years ago

        It might be hot enough that some of the players spontaneously combust.

  44. Drake   9 years ago

    Dems launch "Trust Hillary" campaign. Nation laughs.

    http://www.infowars.com/desper.....-campaign/

  45. Brett L   9 years ago

    Today in "science":
    The scientifically endorsed version of chemtrails:

    Children in America today are at an unacceptably high risk of developing neurodevelopmental disorders that affect the brain and nervous system including autism, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, intellectual disabilities, and other learning and behavioral disabilities. These are complex disorders with multiple causes?genetic, social, and environmental. The contribution of toxic chemicals to these disorders can be prevented.

    And in actual science, a huge step back for fMRI -- not that it will stop the government from using it as a modern lie-detector, even if it is just as inaccurate.

    1. Thymirus   9 years ago

      Government is expert at destroying entire industries in pursuit of its own vision for public health, whatever that means. Most American automotive enthusiasts, for instance, will be able to recite a dozen examples of iconic, even legendary cars from the 1960s that were ruined by emission controls enacted in time for the models of the 1970s.

      Here's a timeline for the Corvette, since that's my baby:

      1958: 282ci small-blocks producing up to 290 horsepower.
      1961: Power rises to 315 top-rated.
      1965: 396ci L-78 producing 425 horsepower.
      Around this time, engines on these cars could be very easily modified to top 600 horses were very, very readily, so reliable was the technology.
      ...
      1975: 350ci V8 on the Stingray rated at 165 horsepower after the emissions regulations eviscerated engine design.

      Government -- always there to fuck things up beyond recognition.

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        I'm pretty happy that cars in general are so clean now. There was a whole lot of actually harmful (i.e. not just CO2) pollution from old cars. But enthusiasts should be able to use/drive what they want. And I think the cleaner engines could have happened voluntarily. People want clean air and good fuel economy.

        Emissions regulations are getting pretty absurd now, though. New engines are ridiculously clean.

        1. Stormy Dragon   9 years ago

          There was a whole lot of actually harmful (i.e. not just CO2) pollution from old cars. But enthusiasts should be able to use/drive what they want.

          Cool, can I drive around in a vehicle that spews out chlorine gas? I mean sure people are asphyxiating every time I drive by, but who are you to tell enthusiasts what they should be able to use/drive?

          1. Zeb   9 years ago

            If and when that becomes a problem, you can probably make the case that that causes sufficient harm that it should be banned. The law doesn't need to address every unlikely scenario. And for now you can pretty much put whatever engine you want in a car if you DIY and it doesn't seem to be a major problem.

  46. Rich   9 years ago

    Saudi Arabia was hit by three separate suicide attacks in a 24-hour period

    Well, it is the holey month.

  47. Pat (PM)   9 years ago

    Elite K-8 school teaches white students they're born racist

    An elite Manhattan school is teaching white students as young as 6 that they're born racist and should feel guilty benefiting from "white privilege," while heaping praise and cupcakes on their black peers.

    Administrators at the Bank Street School for Children on the Upper West Side claim it's a novel approach to fighting discrimination...

    They complain the K-8 school of 430 kids is separating whites in classes where they're made to feel awful about their "whiteness," and all the "kids of color" in other rooms where they're taught to feel proud about their race and are rewarded with treats and other privileges.[...]

    Bank Street has created a "dedicated space" in the school for "kids of color," where they're "embraced" by minority instructors and encouraged to "voice their feelings" and "share experiences about being a kid of color," according to school presentation slides obtained by The Post.

    Meanwhile, white kids are herded into separate classrooms and taught to raise their "awareness of the prevalence of Whiteness and privilege," challenge "notions of colorblindness (and) assumptions of 'normal,' 'good,' and 'American'" and "understand and own European ancestry and see the tie to privilege."

    1. Rufus The Monocled   9 years ago

      Yeh.

      That's not good.

    2. Drake   9 years ago

      So they are teaching them to feel guilty because white people are just plain better? I bet that's the message at least half of them will hear.

    3. Lee G   9 years ago

      Fuck that shit.

    4. Tornado16nb   9 years ago

      Wouldn't this be segregation?

      1. SugarFree   9 years ago

        It's the good kind.

      2. Drake   9 years ago

        Segregation is okay if the left does it. (Ignores the fact that they did it last time around too)

      3. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

        They've found a way to get away with it.

    5. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

      *Looks up school tuition*

      Parents are paying over $40,000 for this shit?

      1. Lee G   9 years ago

        I believe it's the class of parents who are extremely wealthy and only care about the name recognition of the school.

        What they teach the kids is totally insignificant.

    6. Eternal Blue Sky   9 years ago

      "challenge 'notions of colorblindness'"

      I don't get why these people are so hard to shut down.

      "Colorblindness" is a part of Islam.

      I thought Muslims ranked higher than race on the progressive stack??

      Shouldn't people be able to shut this down by simply pulling an Islamophobia card and lambasting the schools for teaching that Islamic values are false??

    7. Cdr Lytton   9 years ago

      Screw Bank Street. I hate hated their crappy word processor.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        You are old.

    8. Citizen X   9 years ago

      encouraged to "voice their feelings" and "share experiences about being a kid of color,"

      "Yeah, it sucks, i get pulled out of class to go do some bullshit."

    9. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      Naked racism that would make Bull Connor blush.

      Seriously, these people need to be punched in the face.

    10. Zeb   9 years ago

      And that is supposed to help fight discrimination and racial tensions? How the fuck does that work?

  48. Pat (PM)   9 years ago

    St. Louis Fire Department releases list of ambulance visits to Planned Parenthood

    The St. Louis Fire Department recently released a list of emergency calls to the Planned Parenthood clinic in the Central West End as part of a settlement in a lawsuit filed by an anti-abortion group.

    The document shows 58 emergency calls to the health clinic from Jan. 1, 2009, to April 6, 2016, or about one call every 46 days. It does not specify whether calls are related to abortions. More than half of the calls were for general concerns including allergic reactions, fainting, falls, seizures, psychiatric issues and illnesses.

    Mary Kogut, CEO of Planned Parenthood St. Louis, said there were about 135,000 patient visits during that time period, plus staff and visitors to the building. In addition to abortion, the clinic provides routine medical care to men and women, cancer screenings, sexually transmitted disease tests, permanent birth control procedures and counseling.[...]

    There were 23 emergency calls from the clinic for hemorrhages, or heavy bleeding, which is a potential complication of abortion. Hemorrhaging can also be triggered by other disorders treated by the clinic.

    1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

      Who's footing the bill?

      I'll bet you it's not PP, but the taxpayer at large.

      1. Tonio   9 years ago

        Generally they bill the patient or the patient's insurance.

        1. Zeb   9 years ago

          Yeah, ambulance rides are definitely not free.

  49. John DeWitt   9 years ago

    Oh, good. The FBI will be making a statement today, after interviewing Hillary over the weekend. Let me guess...she'll be recommended for reprimand. Ann Coulter will stand behind her, ringing a bell. Shame! Shame! It'll be sad to see the Hoover building go.

    1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

      That's my guess too... mistakes were made but nothing bad happened so let's all move along.

    2. Fist of Etiquette   9 years ago

      NO SPOILERS

    3. Drake   9 years ago

      She needs to walk around with a really big undead SS guard.

      1. Agent Cooper   9 years ago

        +1 Castle Wolfenstein

    4. Slammer   9 years ago

      Think this hurts her? If she's not indicted, everyone knows it's BS, but does this affect her candidacy in any meaningful way?

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        It doesn't hurt her. It just puts the final nail in the coffin of Rule of Law in America. I still can't believe that FBI is willing to piss away its public reputation over this. Surely, they're going to recommend charges.

        1. Slammer   9 years ago

          Yep. I guess the mask is completely off now. All the corruption is open, and "fuck you, what are you gonna do about it?"

        2. Drake   9 years ago

          Leadership is willing. The ranks will engage in a slow-drip of leaks until November. Wikileaks and the Russians might get into it too.

    5. Idle Hands   9 years ago

      A couple of things one, there is no way they are going to say they are announcing a recommendation to indict a couple days removed from the interview. So either Comey is going to say nothing to see here or some people have suggested he is going to publicly step down from his post because of how political/corrupt the whole thing has become.

    6. Bobarian (Would Chip Her)   9 years ago

      Worst part?

      Making her walk down the Mall naked.

      The amount of vomiting induced will actually produce a public health crisis.

  50. Pat (PM)   9 years ago

    Judge Richard Posner: The academy is out of its depth

    [...]And on another note about academia and practical law, I see absolutely no value to a judge of spending decades, years, months, weeks, day, hours, minutes, or seconds studying the Constitution, the history of its enactment, its amendments, and its implementation (across the centuries?well, just a little more than two centuries, and of course less for many of the amendments). Eighteenth-century guys, however smart, could not foresee the culture, technology, etc., of the 21st century. Which means that the original Constitution, the Bill of Rights, and the post?Civil War amendments (including the 14th), do not speak to today. David Strauss is right: The Supreme Court treats the Constitution like it is authorizing the court to create a common law of constitutional law, based on current concerns, not what those 18th-century guys were worrying about.

    In short, let's not let the dead bury the living.

    1. Thymirus   9 years ago

      This simpleminded degenerate manages to encapsulate within a single paragraph the method and attitude by which the judiciary can usurp our republican system of government, as it was designed, and establish a complex, tyrannical machine to rule over us.

      Nuke him from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

      1. Injun, as in from India   9 years ago

        Easy, bro. Remember the woodchipper subpoenas?

        1. Thymirus   9 years ago

          Suggested fix for totalitarian justices:

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwlNPhn64TA

    2. Free Society   9 years ago

      Richard Posner offers a lovely Chicago school theory of justice and jurisprudence.

    3. Suthenboy   9 years ago

      Hey Dick, make the world a better place. Go stretch a rope.

    4. Stormy Dragon   9 years ago

      I always get the two mixed up. Is Richard Posner the good Posner or the evil Posner?

  51. Pat (PM)   9 years ago

    Dental Fillings Heal Teeth With Stem Cells

    Regenerative dental fillings that allow teeth to heal themselves have been developed by researchers, potentially eliminating the need for root canals.

    The treatment, developed by scientists from the University of Nottingham and Harvard University, earned a prize from the Royal Society of Chemistry after judges described it as a "new paradigm for dental treatments."

    The tooth filling works by stimulating stem cells to encourage the growth of dentin?the bony material that makes up the majority of the tooth?allowing patients to effectively regrow teeth that are damaged through dental disease.

    This is a significant step forward from current methods to treat cavities, which involve drilling out the decay and putting in a filling. When these fail, a root canal is needed to remove the pulp of the tooth and damage it even further.[...]

    "We have designed synthetic biomaterials that can be used similarly to dental fillings but can be placed in direct contact with pulp tissue to stimulate the native stem cell population for repair and regeneration of pulp tissue and the surrounding dentin."

    1. Dr. Pangloss   9 years ago

      Matt Stone and Trey Parker sue for copyright infringement.

  52. Agile Cyborg   9 years ago

    The long thin dark of loneliness and perpetual sigh yawns between the tempest of clashing oppressors. Numbly shrugging and shuffling in the tapestries of shadows the conversing rowdies chip paths into the misty fabric of human nature that winds ever deeper beneath the growing throne... where quiet is real and living is distinct and personal even as the throne hardens and billows its spilling prisons and jagged orders.

  53. Juvenile Bluster   9 years ago

    Harris County, Texas Sheriff's office on woman who was forcibly raped "digitally penetrated" during a search: You can't indict my deputies, my internal investigation cleared them!

    "It was unbelievable. They completely stripped her naked, from the waist down, spread her legs apart, threw her down in handcuffs, and had her face down in the concrete with her legs spread apart for, I mean, it had to be ten, eleven minutes," said Corley's attorney, Sam Cammack.

    Harris County deputies say they found .02 ounces of marijuana on Corley. But the district attorney dropped charges of marijuana possession and resisting arrest, saying that the search was "offensive and shocking."

    Usually after an indictment like this, you wouldn't hear more from the sheriff or DA until a hearing or trial.

    Friday, the sheriff issued a press release that slammed the DA and accused prosecutors of presenting the case to the grand jury unfairly.

    The press release reads, in part: "Rumor, innuendo and sensationalism do not correlate to the facts surrounding Corely's (sic) arrest."

    1. SugarFree   9 years ago

      Half a gram? Thank you, Texas, for saving us from this master criminal.

      1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

        Children could have smoked that! CHILDREN!

    2. Brett L   9 years ago

      I am shocked and pleased at this turn of events. The DA is independently indicting? AND they refused to charge? This is better than when Miami PD tried to fuck with the FHP over that deputy getting pulled over and arrested.

    3. Free Society   9 years ago

      I'm sure his internal investigation was very thorough.

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        Not as thorough as his deputies'.

      2. Libertarian   9 years ago

        *not sure if this deserves a narrowed gaze* I can't tell anymore!

  54. Hamster of Doom   9 years ago

    *lights the Bailey signal*

    People Support Ethical Automated Cars That Prioritize the Lives Of Others - Unless They're Riding In One

  55. Sevo   9 years ago

    "SF's minimum wage hike took effect July 1, but changes little"
    (pay wall) http://www.sfchronicle.com/bus.....ate-result

    Yes, the new minimum wage took effect three days ago (over a holiday weekend), and the sky hasn't fallen, so see there, Mr. Smartypants?!
    Amazingly, the paper version has a quote from an economist mentioning that people will lose jobs as a result; it's ignored in the story.

  56. Brett L   9 years ago

    Saw my first McDonalds with a self-order, self-pay station in Homosassa, FL yesterday. Coming soon to a $15/hr locality near you. Not that Homosassa is a $15/hr locality. I'm not sure why its there. All the kids are working at the Dollar General and the gas station? Anyhow, I'm excited for the robot cooks to not fuck up my order. When does that future show up?

    1. Agile Cyborg   9 years ago

      Millenialization of the job market, bro. The swathes of up and coming millions of hardware/software addicts glued to screens and code have been ingested by their own fucking digital lust. One fucking demands shit in electronic, they get shit in electronic.

      1. Zeb   9 years ago

        And no job.

    2. Brett L   9 years ago

      I also asked my wife if she thought the locals called themselves "Homosassuals". She just shook her head.

  57. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

    Holy batshit, GayJay. You sound like a long time member of the DNC. There are many bad things you could say about Trump and all you got is the race card? Fuck.

    1. Certified Public Asshat   9 years ago

      Meh, it is very appealing to a lot of voters.

      1. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

        Not to libertarians. It's mostly popular with Democrats and progs. So I guess Gary is courting that .00001% of the vote he's going to get from that demographic and the hell with libertarians. The guy is more of an embarrassment with each passing day. He shouldn't have quit cannabis. In fact, he should smoke 2x as much.

        1. tarran   9 years ago

          Dude! Chillax.

          We are doomed to live in a world where horrible people are President. Don't fash yourself over it, but figure out how to get by.

          1. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

            Well, we know for sure it's either the Donald or the Hildebeast, so yeah, it's going to be horrible. But at least we could get some faux hope by wasting our vote on a real libertarian. Sigh...

            1. tarran   9 years ago

              Look at it this way. Say Gay Jay had won the Democratic primaries and was running against Jeb Bush... would you be so upset by his pronouncements? You'd be rolling your eyes at some of them, sure, but you probably wouldn't be as bothered by the fact a person who wasn't in the Libertarian Party was saying them.

              The only way the Libertarian party will enjoy electoral success is if it becomes un-libertarian, becoming an organization just as misnamed as the Republicans and the Democrats. The Democrats aren't really very democratic. The Republicans are definitely not real republicans.

              So drink and be merry, chum!

              1. R C Dean   9 years ago

                Say Gay Jay had won the Democratic primaries and was running against Jeb Bush... would you be so upset by his pronouncements?

                I'd be a little worried that he was slagging Trump when his opponent is Bush.

          2. commoditous   9 years ago

            Don't fash yourself over it, but figure out how to get by.

            Dinnae fash ye'self, laddie! Keep ye' heid o'!

        2. Domestic Dissident   9 years ago

          This is just who the guy is. He's a democrat (albeit a moderate one by the current psychotic standards of that party) who for some weird reason gets his jollies pretending to be everything except what he really iss.

          1. Zeb   9 years ago

            So, besides being OK with public accommodation anti-discrimination laws (which is really just pragmatic, those laws aren't going away whatever we think), how is he a Democrat?

            1. Stormy Dragon   9 years ago

              Anyone who doesn't go out of their way to be a dick to the poor and minorities is a secret progressive. It is known.

        3. Suthenboy   9 years ago

          He should double down on this shit. Take as many voters from The Hildebeast as possible.

        4. Zeb   9 years ago

          The relevant thing isn't whether libertarians agree with the comments. It is whether anyone will not vote for him because of them who would have other wise.

      2. Drake   9 years ago

        Sure. Democrat voters.

  58. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

    Local fireworks started a little late, so I didn't get home until 11PM.

    And then some neighbors a street over decided to keep up the explosions until after midnight. Needless to say I'm a bit beat today, and it's a workout day.

  59. The Late P Brooks   9 years ago

    There are many bad things you could say about Trump and all you got is the race card? Fuck.

    Throw in some gobbledegook about wealth inequality, and Gary can siphon off dozens of Berniebros.

    1. Hyp's Brexit Butthurt Lotion   9 years ago

      He could just tell the millennials that they really, truly are special snowflakes who should get whatever it is they're whining about at the moment, with no effort on their own part. If he does that, maybe 3 of them will actually go to the polls and cast a vote for him.

  60. Slammer   9 years ago

    BURN

  61. The Late P Brooks   9 years ago

    He could just tell the millennials that they really, truly are special snowflakes who should get whatever it is they're whining about at the moment

    FREE COLLEGE

  62. Slammer   9 years ago

    She got off

    1. Lord Humungus   9 years ago

      yep.

      Veronique de Rugy Retweeted
      Jared Rizzi ?@JaredRizzi 3m3 minutes ago

      tl;dr Comey:
      1. Clinton should have known better
      2. Lots of classified emails sent
      3. Prob hacked
      4. State Dept bad
      5. Rec: NO CHARGES

      1. Brett L   9 years ago

        NOW they rediscover mens rea?

  63. Brett L   9 years ago

    We're about 70 million guns shy of a majority. Everyone get to the gun store and do your part.

    America has 4.4 percent of the world's population but nearly half of its civilian-owned guns http://bit.ly/1Xh42TU

    1. Zeb   9 years ago

      Why would it be a surprise that a large rich country with very little restriction on civilian gun ownership compared to other similar countries would have much more civilian gun ownership?

  64. commoditous   9 years ago

    Good God, I am a connoisseur of hangovers but this morning's is a twenty-year oak-aged bourbon of hangovers. It's bad enough that it woke me out of a dead sleep in time for work. I didn't even manage to set my alarm last night, I just woke up hating myself for having dug into an anthill and planting my brain there. Narrowly got to work on time. Tom Wolfe wrote about an alcoholic journalist whose hangovers he described as a cracked egg with a mercury yolk, and the guy had to be careful about moving his head too much lest he break the yolk and spill the toxic sludge. It's not quite that bad, but it does feel like someone's practicing acupuncture on my skull with a dental drill.

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