Brickbat: Pizza Man

marckbass8 / Pixabay

Joey Vanoni, owner of Pizza di Joey, is one of two food truck operators represented by the Institute for Justice fighting a Baltimore law that bars them from parking within 300 feet of a restaurant that serves the same type of cuisine. In Vanoni's case, it means that he can park no closer than 300 feet to any restaurant serving pizza.

Comments

[dudemeister]

Wow, there are no words for how absurd this law is.

[Groovus Maximus]

"Derp!" should suffice.

[UnCivilServant]

but the law is not 'derp' in the classical sense, it is blatant protectionism for a given market segment.

[Groovus Maximus]

We need a ruling from a Derpetologist. I want a credentialed interpretation, dammit!

[straffinrun]

*Slaps down family photo of Sis wearing a Feel the Bern T shirt*

Objection sustained.

[Tom Bombadil]

Ugg, Derp dish pizza is the worst.

[(((Renegade)))]

FUCK YOU THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS DEEP DISH PIZZA.

[UnCivilServant]

*taps renegade's shoulder*

Go back and read that again

[(((Renegade)))]

Derp.

[UnCivilServant]

I know of at least one food truck where the people who ran it also operated a brick and mortar restaurant specializing in the same cuisine. If they were in Baltimore, would they be forbidden from parking in front of their own restaurant?

Does this "No Parking" clause also apply when the truck is not selling? Because that would make the previous scenario even more absurd.

[Tom Bombadil]

I propose a law that would accomplish the same result. Any restaurant within 300 feet of where Joey is parked must immediately cease serving pizza.

[UnCivilServant]

Oh, and I must ask, does this ban apply if the two business offer cuisines that the ignorant mistake for the same then they are not? ie, one place sells pizza, the other sells deep dish casseroles.

[(((Renegade)))]

One thing in favor of Baltimore, they don't have those thick tomato pies.

I miss the days of the Kosmakos family.

[Adans smith]

Since it's a crony law ,I'm sure they will take as far as possible to 'protect' these poor businesses form these trucks.

[UnCivilServant]

but not from rioters

[straffinrun]

Does this mean I can't toss salads from my van in front of Olive Garden anymore?

[Groovus Maximus]

Considering what you do with the breadsticks....no. Please Sod, no!

[Adans smith]

Since Olive Garden isn't Italian food , I say make anything you want

[straffinrun]

Let me rephrase. Does this mean I can't "toss salads" from my "van" "in front of" "Olive Garden" anymore?

[Adans smith]

Oh,I see,drive by salad.

[straffinrun]

Adans, you're making me do this.
NSFW unless you work in a prison.

[Adans smith]

I see where your coming from now.

[Fist of Etiquette]

In the two years since he's opened, Vanoni has only had the police called on him once for an alleged violation of the proximity ban. Vanoni showed officers who arrived a map of nearby restaurants selling pizza and verified they were farther than 300 feet away.

After confirming the Pizza di Joey food truck was parked the legal distance away, the officer later came back for lunch and received a discount, as all civil servants, active duty military, and veterans do, Vanoni recalled.

He deserves to be put out of business if that's the sum total of his lobbying efforts. Is he too good to grease the palms of people who actually matter?

[Groovus Maximus]

He's too busy greasing the pans with his...essence...(Pizza di Joey...Exactly What it Says On the Tin), Fist of Inducement.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I like it when the main ingredient is love.

[The Hyperbole]

Can he park in front of a closed pizza shop? And can they open if he's parked out front and doing business first?

[UnCivilServant]

No. Yes.

The penalties are all for the truck, and I doubt the law states that the protectee need be open to have their monopoly sustained.

[Rhywun]

It's good to be friends with the King.

[toolkien]

The answer is obvious - Open Faced Calzones di Joey.

Problem solved.

[Robert]

Hard to blame the person whose real estate taxes pay for the street for wanting protection from competitors setting up shop out front. Of course the vehicle & fuel taxes pay for roads too, but I think that's mostly not the local streets. However, 300' seems to go far beyond the frontage that the real estate's paying for.