A.M. Links: Cruz Beats Trump to Win GOP Iowa Caucus, Clinton Declares Victory Over Bernie, Bernie Fans Call Clinton 'Liar'

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  • Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders still appear to be in a virtual tie among Iowa Democrats, though Clinton has declared victory in the state's caucus.
  • "She's a liar!" Bernie Sanders fans in Iowa do not think kindly of Hillary Clinton.
  • "Just how big is the market for legal pot? A new report by a leading marijuana industry investment and research firm found legal cannabis sales jumped 17%, to $5.4 billion, in 2015 and they will grow by a whopping 25% this year to reach $6.7 billion in total U.S. sales."

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  1. “She’s a liar!” Bernie Sanders fans in Iowa do not think kindly of Hillary Clinton.

    Joe’s time to shine!

    1. Hello!

    2. Will the press descend on him like they did to that GoP congress critter a few years back?

    3. My greatest hope right now is that Hillary and Rubio/Cruz are the Red and Blue candidates, with Bernie and Trump running as independents.

      That would be great theater.

      1. I think the Democrats would actually lose their fucking minds at Sanders running a 3rd (or 4th!) party candidacy.

        1. That implies that your establishment Dem has a mind to lose.

          1. “mind”, “cluster of nerves located between their head and ass to help relay sensory data”, whatever.

      2. with Bernie and Trump running as independents.

        What is Bloomberg, chopped liver?

      3. That’d result in a Rubio/Cruz presidency, no doubt about it.

      4. My wish is to see Sanders and Clinton bump into each other, start brawling, and both suffer debilitating strokes. Their poll numbers dip enough to get Biden to enter the race, who immediately dies eating a peanut after forgetting his severe peanut allergy. The Dems decide to hell with it and draw names from a hat to determine their candidate – Beulah Mewler, a calico cat owned by a family in Sheboygan.

        Meanwhile, Trump goes nuts over a comment about his hair and goes on TV torturing a puppy to death to show what he intends to do to all of you not stupid enough to vote for him. His poll numbers go up slightly as a result, but everyone other than Rubio and Cruz drop out, their supporters switch to Cruz and Rubio, Trump falls to third place and quits the race in a rage over how you idiots don’t appreciate his greatness and don’t deserve him as your king.

        Cruz and Rubio agree to a debate with knives, both are fatally wounded. The GOP decides to hell with it and pick their candidate by drawing names from a hat – being careful to first screen out the cats – and go with Brawn E. Papertowel as their man.

        The tie between the write-in votes for Hugh Jass, Homer Sexual, D. Enda Madick and Heywood Jablomie throws the election into the House where the fighting results in the deaths of 433 Congressmen. Deciding to hell with it and we’ll just draw names from a hat, a brilliant compromise is reached and the hat becomes our next President.

        1. Silk Tophat 2016!!

        2. Game of Thrones + Dr. Suess = Better than the idiots we have now.

  2. 142) An idea occurred to me yesterday. Whenever there’s a police shooting, for whatever reason, justified or not, the officer who fired should be forced to retire immediately.

    Most police shootings could be averted by defusing the situation. If an officer doesn’t have the judgment to take the course of action that defuses the situation, he shouldn’t be an officer.

    I hear so often that most police officers never discharge their weapons during their entire career. Good, so this won’t affect most officers.

    I also hear how traumatic it is for an officer involved in a police shooting, even when he had no choice. Maybe there are such situations. But if an officer is so traumatized, it sounds like he needs to move on to a different career. And if an officer isn’t affected emotionally after a shooting, I’m doubly sure I don’t want him on the force.

    1. I hate to break it to you, brah, but there’s nothing to fix. The machine’s ticking over, well-oiled and precision-tuned for exactly these results.

    2. Intriguing. However, you need to work out a few bugs, like dealing with those who discharge their weapon on purpose in order to retire.

      1. Easy fix.

        Whenever there’s a police shooting, for whatever reason, justified or not, the officer who fired should be forced to retireired immediately.

        Although, realistically, an independent review board would be fair (if it truly were independent).

        1. An independent review board is the best, with the power to fire the cop, remove is pension, and recommend indictment to an independent prosecutor. I’d love to hear a presidential candidate talk about setting up something like this.

          1. I’d start the board from the point of “Officer, as of now you no longer work for the police force, unless you can convince this board that there was NO other solution”.

          2. An independent review board and a requirement that the board has at least one voting member who has been convicted of a crime and the number of people on the board with connections to the police or prosecutor’s office cannot exceed the number of criminals on the board. Finally, the government and the police department agreed to be bound by the decisions of the board reference an officer’s continued employment. Basically, I think there needs to be some real antagonism between the police, prosecutors, and the community. A lot of these review boards just seem to be way too stacked with members who are former cops, DAs, family of such, etc.

        2. “What do you mean SWAT wont shoot the guy?”
          “The squad said l, and I quote, ‘My kids are starting college in three years, and we are all on track for promotions. Find someone else to pay the price of authority with their jobs and run the risk of a life or death judgment call.”

      2. I think giving them a desk job is better – we can’t afford thousands of 30-year-old “retired” cops.

    3. I think the concern is that officer’s won’t use their guns when they should. We hear about all the situations were things go wrong (and there is way too much of that don’t get me wrong), but there are also a lot of legitimate police shootings too. It seems like throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Tamper proof cameras seem like something much better to push for.

      1. I don’t see how you could make a camera tamper-proof. Ultimately someone is going to be in charge of starting recording, stopping recording and downloading the video. That someone will be a cop or cop-friendly. I think there need to be consequences to failing to use a camera properly. If your camera malfunctions or gets turned off then you are officially reprimanded and your testimony and any evidence gathered is inadmissible in court. Repeat offenders get a desk job or get fired. Of course, in order to do any of this people have to get mad enough to counter the police unions. It’s going to be a long uphill struggle no matter which way you go.

      2. “I think the concern is that officer’s won’t use their guns when they should.”

        I wouldn’t, and I style myself as reasonable and rational.

        Incentive to Use Deadly Force in this current political climate… high or low?

        Let’s add the potential cost of employment, insurance, Police Union fees, and the requirement that the police officer in question acquire new skills for a new job…

        Who would be a cop then, especially when they know that a justified shooting costs them their job? “I am going to serve my local community by calling in the Feds to shoot Jimmy instead of me going over there and talking to him. Don’t want to lose my job! I’ll just tell Jimmy’s wife it was the dirty old feds that shot Jimmy; Feds that took a bus from the airport.”

        I dont like police brutality or racism, but you dont get rid of specific instances of racism or brutality by putting the weight of an officer’s livelihood (which is comparable to a teacher’s), on their trigger finger, especially if other lives are on the line.

        Man, Reason commentariot hates cops. I empathize, but man, angsty bunch on here sometimes.

        “If a woman gets an abortion she should be banned from sex immediately, justified or not.”

      3. there are also a lot of legitimate police shootings too.

        Citation needed. I have a really hard time believing this.

    4. I really think I have a better, commonsensical idea: Require cops to file a public report every time they draw their weapons while on duty, and make failure to file a report cause for termination. Each report would require the cop to state whether or not he placed his finger on the trigger. Fit a transponder to the holster of every weapon that cops carry and to any other weapon that is stored in a police vehicle. When the weapon — pistol, shotgun, or taser — is drawn, the transponder pings and creates a record in a database with a weapon id, officer name, and GPS coordinates. This could also trigger a call to other cops that the officer senses he is in danger if he is not at a location where he would remove his weapon for maintenance and practice purposes. On a weekly basis, compare GPS coordinates on each ping with reports filed. If GPS coordinates do not correspond with the location of a police station, shooting range, or the cop’s residence and no report has been filed, follow up with the offending cop.

      I suffer no delusion that cops would file fully honest reports or that they would be prosecuted or fired for abusive use of their weapons. However, the hassle of filing a report would probably create a deterrent to drawing their weapon in absurd situations like a snowball “fight”. Sure, it would cause a paperwork burden on cops, particularly cops who frequently draw their weapons, and make them less “productive” … but that is a good thing.

      1. I have a better, commonsensical idea. Cops should not be armed with firearms.

        If you have a live violent crime situation bring in the swat team, like a fire department for fires. But otherwise, no one should be walking around with a badge and a gun in a so-called free society.

  3. Democrat Martin O’Malley and Republican Mike Huckabee have both suspended their presidential campaigns.

    At least they wasted everyone’s time as long as they could.

    1. Personally, I was a bit surprised O’Malley failed to even remotely catch on in a three-person race that included an avowed socialist and a woman well known to be an evil narcissist.

      1. No differentiator, no easy tag. Just a bland, faceless politico.

        1. He has a band, that counts for something.

        2. Perhaps. I guess I naively figured being neither a socialist nor a criminal would count for something.

          1. But then there’s no simple one-word tag. That very important in marketing.

        3. First mick President??

          1. Well, not counting JFK, anyway.

  4. Ted Cruz won yesterday’s Republican Iowa caucus.

    He’s cut! He’s cut! The mogul is cut and it’s a bad cut!

  5. Ted Cruz won yesterday’s Republican Iowa caucus.

    Excuses and conspiracy theories… GO!

    1. I have a suspicion it will have something to do with mailers.

    2. Canadian sleeper agents.

      1. Damn Canucks don’t want America to be Great again.

        1. America’s Hat vs. America’s Hat

          1. America’s Hat vs. America’s Hat Hockey Helmet.

            1. Are we done?

              1. America’s Hat vs. America’s Dong

                1. “They prefer being called ‘the Sunshine State,’ Homer.”

          2. America’s Hat vs. America’s Asshat.

    3. And unwarranted mentioning of their Cubanism.

      1. He’s a Cubanadian! He’s miscegenated!! He ain’t even old timey!!

        1. Oh! Brother!

      2. Cuban Heels

  6. Female brain is not wired for weight loss, scientists conclude

    For women, shedding the pounds can feel like a unending struggle of dieting and exercise with little results.

    But a new study suggests that there could be a reason why females find it more difficult to lose weight than men.

    Researchers say hormones responsible for regulating appetite, physical activity and energy expenditure work differently in the sexes.

    John: yesss!!!

    1. So it’s not because women believe losing weight is about endlessly walking on the treadmill at a leisurely rate while watching daytime television or chatting with your neighbor, rather than lifting weights and increasing your metabolism?

      1. No, of course not, it could never be the fault of the choices they make!

      2. Have you been in a rural WalMart recently?

        Leisurely walking is fantastic exercise to most Americans.

        Plus from a counter-intuitive standpoint, recent research suggests that many gain pounds with the gym-heavy routines.

        1. I think the issue is that we don’t have enough low level activity all day long. A short burst once a day wears you out and makes it so you don’t move much the rest of the day.

          1. My girlfriend now-wife was at her skinniest when she taught ballroom dancing. Up on her feet all day, moving and living on very little money (the pay was terrible) does wonders for weight loss.

          2. That paper to which I linked suggests that folks who do the short burst once a day often compensate by eating more, as well. Double whammy.

        2. Plus from a counter-intuitive standpoint, recent research suggests that many gain pounds with the gym-heavy routines.

          Warty dresses out at just a hair under 11,000 pounds, it is known. Of course, he consists partially of super-heavy elements rarely found outside of supernovae.

      3. I was at the gym last night and saw a woman lifting 3 lb pink weights.

        There is no human being on Earth who will get benefits from 3 lb weights.

        Also:

        “But a new study suggests that there could be a reason why females find it more difficult to lose weight than men.”

        Cool, then why do people in other countries not have the problems with obesity faced by Americans and a few other ridiculously fat countries? Whenever I see this articles that are basically like “obesity isn’t your fault, there’s nothing you can do!” I always wonder why it is Sweden doesn’t seem to have this problem.

        1. Don’t be misled by the retarded headline. The finding is seemingly less retarded but also not what’s claimed:

          Current obesity medications stimulate the production of POMC peptides in the brain which regulate appetite, increase energy expenditure through heat and encourage movement. But researchers found in female mice the hormones only regulated appetite – they did not have the extra benefits.

        2. Irish, this may come as a shock to you, but women are really really weak in their upper bodies. Ridiculously weak, especially if they don’t do any kind of sport that requires their arms. Starting off on 3 lb weights is actually reasonable for a lot of girls.

          1. Nice… Irish got femsplained!

            Ha-Ha! / Nelson Muntz

          2. A lot of women you see using three lb weights are cranking out dozens of reps with no discernible effort. And they come back the next week and do three lb weights again. And 3 lb weights the week after that…

            And they never lose weight or get any more muscle.

            I understand the argument that ‘oh, I’m just starting and getting into it,’ but that isn’t really what I mean. A lot of women do ridiculously light exercises *and then never try to increase the weight ever* and are confused why month after month of three lb weights doesn’t result in any gain. It’s like running a quarter mile really slowly and then running a quarter mile really slowly a few days later and doing that same run over and over. Your body adapts very quickly and if you aren’t increasing the exercise you’re never going to see any positive gains in terms of losing fat or gaining muscle.

            People think if they go to the gym and do anything they should see positive results and then they get frustrated because they waste half an hour at the gym every day doing exercises that waste time but don’t benefit them. That’s how you get women (and many men) saying “oh man, I struggle so hard! I go to the gym every day!” Well yeah, but you have a shit routine that doesn’t help increase your fitness.

            Same with diets, incidentally. A lot of people engage in stupid, unscientific crash diets rather than just eating healthy and are confused why their weight yo-yos.

            1. “I don’t want to gain too much muscle and get all bulky”.

              I hear women say that all the time. (And sometimes, I even hear men say it). As if that is so fucking easy.

              1. “Puny man is puny.”

                Question for the audience. Transwomen, weight loss privilege? Eh?

              2. Yes. I am the only female in my social circle who lifts. (Though I do know a super-impressive legal secretary who looks like a bodybuilding competitor). And when I am asked what I do for exercise, and I tell my friends, they look at me as if I just sprouted wings.

          3. Indeed. This changes when they start having children, though. Kids get heavy long before you can stop picking them up.

        3. My daughter enjoys her three pound pink weights. Of course, being 6, she probably does get some benefit from them.

          1. Yeah, there are age considerations. If you’re 70 years old, any activity is good and has benefits compared to sitting around. I’m talking about 30 year old women I see who would have no difficulty doing harder exercises. Know how I can tell they’d have no difficulty? Because the lift that fucking pink weight 60 times in a row with no break which you should never be able to do if you’re lifting an appropriate weight that will actually benefit you.

            1. I agree, with the added exception of therapy exercises as well. After my sister had her elbow broken, she had a therapy routine that utilized small weights after her cast came off. If I remember, I believe they started her off with two pound weights and slowly moved up.

              But yes, if you are a normal adult, if you can lift a weight 60 times in a row, you are at the gym for signaling, not fitness. Nothing wrong with that, but if that is the case I don’t want to hear about how you can’t lose weight or tone properly.

        4. A couple of 3 lb weights? Six pounds is approximately what my electric weedeater weighs. My wife will spend 4 or five hours running that thing. She will probably walk 3 or 4 miles on the days we do yard work. She also goes with me to cut firewood and helps load the trailer.

          She is late middle aged, 5 feet tall and 100 lbs after having a heavy meal. She has a super cute ass. I am not talking about a tough, corn fed country girl here. The woman has a masters degree and spent 30 years riding a desk.

          Eat moderate amounts of food and keep moving. Watching Billy Blanks work out on the TEE VEE won’t help. In short: Fork control and getting off of your ass works every time.

      4. Eh, I was too skinny for most of my 20s in part because I walked everywhere. (5’8″ 110-115) I never lifted weights.

        1. I never lifted weights.

          How did you get out of bed? I suppose you could have been one of those no bodies.

          1. I sort of floated out of my coffin every night, that’s the other thing…being undead is great for the figure

        2. I had the same stats in my 20s but it more because I was poor and very hungry most of the time.

    2. For women, shedding the pounds can feel like a unending struggle of dieting and exercise with little results.

      Which wouldn’t be a problem if they would think instead of feeling so damn much.

      1. For mammal, I think you’re the best…

        1. Must be correlated with the rest of the mammals thinking she’s The Worst…

      2. Which wouldn’t be a problem if they would think instead of feeling so damn much.

        Some fresh baked cookies wouldn’t hurt, either.

        1. Just give me a pint or two of ice cream, instead.

  7. …though Clinton has declared victory in the state’s caucus.

    Saying makes it so.

    or

    Depends what your definition of victory is.

  8. Ancient arachnid erection enshrined in amber

    Nearly 99 million years ago, two harvestmen?known to some as daddy longlegs?decided to have sex. Little did they know that their final act would still be preserved today, enshrined in amber in striking detail. The fossil, which shows one ancient arachnid at the moment its penis was fully extended (above), offers a rare example of Cretaceous copulation. Male harvestmen have a retractable penis that spends most of its time tucked away inside its body?unfortunate for arachnologists, because these genitals are a great way to tell the difference between species. So this new mid-coitus fossil gives researchers a unique look at how ancient harvestmen are related to the species that exist today?and just how these ancestors were different. A study published yesterday in the journal Naturwissenschaften describes the fossil and places it in a new, extinct family of harvestmen, based partially on its unusual penis, which sports a spatula-shaped tip.

    something something Doomcock of Doom

    1. Spatula nothing. The tip of the Doomcock is shaped like a Klein bottle.

      1. The Doomcock actually has many tips, it is the Swiss Army knife of penises.

        1. WRONG!

          Swiss Army knives are the Doomcocks of pocketknives.

      2. its unusual penis, which sports a spatula-shaped tip

        I suspect that any erection would sport a spatula-shaped tip after getting hit by a ball of amber five times the size of its owner’s body. I’ve got a new species of spider on the bottom of my shoe that features a spatula-shaped everything and by some evolutionary quirk stores its internal organs externally. Can I get a write-up in a scientific journal?

        1. Depends. Could your study be used to support new shoe requirements regarding eco friendly treads? I represent a shoe tread company, and we love to support the Arts I mean Sciences….

    2. Call you doctor if your erection lasts more than 4 million years.

      1. +1 priapism

    3. Male harvestmen have a retractable penis that spends most of its time tucked away inside its body?unfortunate for arachnologists…

      Because they’re HUGE voyeurs.

      1. No, it’s a survival adaptation to Adele’s career.

        1. That song “hello from the other side” makes me want to pound spikes into my ears. For cereal, I hate, I detest, I loathe that song.

          1. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtQUJMBH8uE

            Try this. Metal makes everything better…

            1. Leo Moracchioli – I will be paying attention. I now like “Hello”

    4. known to some as daddy longlegs

      I have never heard of a harvestmen before. I have knocked many a leg off a daddy longlegs trying to relocate them outside.

      1. Yes this is one of the developments I found out about, when I started buying my son science books. “They didn’t have that when I was your age!” type of thing.

  9. “She’s a liar!”

    In other news, conservative forces vary as the inverse square of distance.

    1. How do liberal forces vary?

  10. Rand didn’t have as good a showing as we might hope, but he should stay in it at least through the next couple primaries. Let’s see how he performs in a smaller field.

    In the Senate he is 1 of 100 with almost no media coverage. In the race he at least has a pulpit, even if it is smaller than other candidates. After the last debate there were a few standard issue progressives in my Facebook feed with positive things to say about him. That’s important, and more than he can get in the Senate.

    1. Am I the only one who feels awfully good Paul beat Bush? There is little silver lining in this all-authoritarian election, but when an uncharismatic Libertarian who ran a bad campaign can still hand the $160M-funded establishment empty suit his ass, that’s comforting.

      1. I think it’s more of a sign of how pissed off the party base is at the establishment. Paul’s people voted for him like always, but the normal good soldier who’d have voted for Bush went for Cruz and Trump instead.

      2. Bush, Fiorina, Kasich, Christie: Paul beat a whole bunch of people, all of whom were getting much more media attention and $$$ than him. In a perfect world, he’d get an apology for being excluded from that debate, but well, you know… I still don’t think he’s going to come anywhere close to the nomination, but I hope that he continues for a bit, and further disseminates the libertarian position.

        Kasich, FWIW, should make a much better showing in NH, if the polls are in any way correct. I’ve seen him around the 8-10 mark, which puts him there with the Jebs and Rubios. Delaying the inevitable though, I think.

        Jeb needs to GTFO already, unless he’s harboring delusions of a brokered convention installing him ahead of Trump, Cruz, or Rubio.

        1. I would not underestimate the chance the GOP would try something that epically stupid. Assuming some sort of three-way tie between Cruz, Rubio, and Trump and then turning to JEB as their savoir. They owuld deserve the absolute shellacking they’d receive as the entire GOP not a member of the Bush family abstained form voting.

  11. How many delegates did Jeb Bush get?

    1. 1

      1. He’s going to have to pick up that pace.

      2. That delegate only cost him something like 20 million dollars. This is why we need to get big money influence out of politics.

        1. Actually it cost him around $155 million for that 1 delegate.

          1. So he’ll just spend $192B to get the 1,237 he needs.

  12. Even Goldman Sachs Has Bailed on Bush

    Marco Rubio took over from Bush as the preferred candidate of Goldman Sachs donors, who gave the Florida senator about $118,000 in the second half of 2015, almost twice what he got in the first six months. Even so, the sum wasn’t close to the more than $700,000 that bankers at the firm gave Bush and his fundraising groups in the first half of the year. Their contributions plunged in the second half to about $47,000.

    “It’s like buying a stock and watching it fall,” said Steven Shafran, a former Goldman Sachs partner who contributed to Bush’s super PAC and was a senior adviser at the Treasury Department to Hank Paulson, once the head of the bank. “Putting good money after bad? He certainly has enough for now. I think people are waiting to see if there’s someone they can support and who has a chance to win. If Jeb has a good New Hampshire, my guess is Goldman guys will pile back in again.”

    1. Be interesting if Jeb flameout caused big donors to realize there isn’t much point in giving huge sums to candidates after their war chest reaches a certain point. I can see why no one is advertising it, but after a million or so dollar your money makes no difference in your winning prospects (first million covers staff and basic brand establishment). It would be cool if these donor took their money to smaller local campaigns instead of throwing so much at the presidential election.

      1. there isn’t much point in giving huge sums to candidates after their war chest reaches a certain point.

        The point is to have given, to be on the list of insiders. Whether the money has any marginal benefit is largely beside the point.

    2. This is good news regarding my Rubio vs Bush bet with PB.

      1. He just can’t catch a break.

  13. A new report by a leading marijuana industry investment and research firm found legal cannabis sales jumped 17%, to $5.4 billion, in 2015…

    Wake us when they outpace the profits from the drug war.

    1. Meh, there might come a time when your enforcers find it more pleasant to just collect a sales tax. Then they can reserve their lazer tag warriors for important things like triggering bloggers, republican campaign managers, and filthy clingers

      1. “Sorry Raul, but we have to arrest you.”
        “Dave. I sell you grass every weekend.”
        “Pipe down would you?!”

  14. Reuters: Marco Rubio emerges as champion of battered Republican establishment

    For months, Cruz and Donald Trump’s brand of angry, scorched-earth, insurgent politics defined the race for the Republican presidential nomination, while more moderate candidates tussled with themselves to try to mount a challenge to them.

    The hope among Republican party leaders has long been for a champion to emerge. And on Monday, that person was Rubio, who finished a hair behind Trump and only a few points behind Cruz.

    When Rubio took the stage in a hotel ballroom after the final results were announced, he gave what amounted to a victory speech. “This is the moment they said would never happen,” the first-term senator said. “For months, they told us we had no chance.”

    The fight for the nomination has unmistakably entered a new phase.

    1. So Marco Rubio’s foaming-at-the-mouth pants-shitting over the ISIS bogeyman we all gotta run and hide under the bed from at the last debate didn’t move him from the moderate to the scorched-earth camp? Because it sure sounded to me like he’s in favor of scorched earth.

  15. P.S.: Punxatawney Phil did not see his shadow.

    1. I’ll take the word of a rodent over the earth’s so-called tilt any day.

      1. I spent about 30 seconds trying to figure out what the Earth’s so called TIT was?

        I guess I better get my mind out of the gutter.

          1. I’m sorry, how white privileged of me. I meant Mt Denali, of course.

            1. Just “Denali” – your cisshitlord “Mt” doesn’t belong there.

    2. He’s more reliable than those people in Iowa.

  16. “Demotions overturned for VA officials accused in job scam”

    A judge has overturned a decision by the Department of Veterans Affairs to demote a senior official accused of manipulating the agency’s hiring system for her own gain.

    The VA demoted Kimberly Graves, director of a St. Paul, Minnesota, regional office for the Veterans Benefits Administration last month. The VA’s acting inspector general said Graves and another senior executive, Diana Rubens, forced lower-ranking managers to accept job transfers and then stepped into the vacant positions themselves, keeping their senior-level pay while reducing their responsibilities.

    http://tinyurl.com/herjrrz

    1. Isn’t single payer wonderful?

      1. Yes, this is why we need government control of everyone’s health care!

    2. Yay moar federal bureaucrats

  17. Corrupt Silk Road Investigator Re-Arrested for Allegedly Trying to Flee the US

    Former Secret Service agent Shaun Bridges was re-arrested on Thursday of last week, just a day before he was scheduled to turn himself in at a Baltimore prison to begin serving a 71-month prison sentence. Bridges pleaded guilty in October to charges of money laundering and obstruction of justice and was released on bail; he confessed that as part of the team investigating the Silk Road anonymous drug market he had secretly stolen around $800,000 worth of bitcoins from the site and placed them in his own account. Federal agents seized hundreds of thousands of dollars in his possession, and he was sentenced to pay another half a million dollars in restitution.

    But despite his guilty plea, Bridges may have planned to escape his prison sentence and leave the country, potentially taking more hidden wealth with him. According to a filing from prosecutors in the Northern District of California last week, the agents who arrested Bridges found that he’d packed his passport, a cell phone, documents related to his wife’s application for citizenship in another country, and corporate records for at least three “offshore entities” in Belize, Nevis and Mauritius (including one that had been created after his guilty plea) into two briefcases

    1. I don’t blame this guy for running. I’d rather be a flaming gay male with a pretty mouth in prison than any sort of ex-law enforcement. I’d be running for the border too if I was him.

    2. WOODCHIPPERS.

    3. Good advertising for bitcoin, though!

  18. though Clinton has declared victory in the state’s caucus..

    Are we sure she isn’t suffering from the effects of a caucussion?

    1. I think Bern is also suffering from the effects of a caucussion.

  19. “She’s a liar!” Bernie Sanders fans in Iowa do not think kindly of Hillary Clinton.

    Was that done in the classic “Let’s go [two-syllable team name]” style?

    1. Depends where they put the clapping.

  20. Tesla tries to open its first Michigan dealership

    Tesla applied to open a dealership in Michigan there in November, even though it’s one of several states that don’t permit automakers to own their own dealerships. It was first reported Friday by the Michigan Information & Research Service.

    In fact, Michigan Governor Rick Snyder signed a law in 2014 that clarified the fact that automakers can not own dealerships in the state.

    Tesla (TSLA) owns all of its own dealerships, unlike General Motors (GM), Ford (F) and Fiat Chrysler (FCAU) and all the foreign automakers.

    Fred Woodhams, spokesman for the Michigan Secretary of State, said he could not comment on how his office will rule on Tesla.

  21. Democrat Martin O’Malley and Republican Mike Huckabee have both suspended their presidential campaigns.

    The campaigns shouldn’t have accidentally brought a single asprin to school.

  22. Aetna CEO Has `Serious Concerns’ About Obamacare Sustainability

    Guertin echoed those comments Monday. “I would not say that we’re more pessimistic,” he said in an interview. “I would say we’re very much in the same place, which is that it’s premature to declare victory or defeat here.”

    Guertin said Bertolini’s remarks were intended to underscore that, even though Aetna’s ACA business appears to be improving, the company still thinks there changes are needed in the ACA’s markets.

    “I don’t want that to get lost in this discussion,” he said. “We do need things in the long haul to be done to make this a stable risk pool and one that can provide affordable coverage to people over time.”

    fixes like: gimme dat gubbimint money

    1. Yep, they are showing that they are team players in the hopes that it will get them some bennies from the government. It’s a not unwise bet to make.

  23. in 2015 and they will grow by a whopping 25% this year to reach $6.7 billion in total U.S. sales.”

    So we’re approximately 2-3 years away from it being involved in an interstate commerce ruling?

  24. Ted Cruz won yesterday’s Republican Iowa caucus.

    BUT WHAT DO THE POLLS THINK?

    1. IIRC, some pundit on CNN (yes, I admit it!) more or less said that last night.

  25. Uniformed PCSO mistaken for stripogram at 50th birthday party

    A police community support officer was mistaken for a stripogram when he accidentally stumbled in on a 50th birthday party in Wiltshire.

    PCSO Mike Ober was on foot patrol in Bradford-on-Avon on Saturday when he spotted an open door at a social club.

    Going in to investigate, he was greeted by a group of women who “went wild with excitement” thinking he was the male stripper they had ordered.

    He said: “The party was about to get started and they thought I was early.”

    1. Sounds like some of the nonsense people would submit the Penthouse Forum.

  26. A Socialist Nearly Won Iowa. Will The Media Stop Obsessing About Donald Trump 24/7?

    So which Left-wing publication is going to pull together a bunch of liberal intellectuals for an “Against Sanders” issue?

    There’s been a ton of concern trolling from Democrats about the chaos and extremism ripping the Republican Party in half. It’s bad for the country, you know? We need two strong and functioning political parties. John Kasich is the only plausible choice to save the GOP and so on. Well, what happens if the GOP ends up nominating some run-of-the-mill Romney-esque Republican or an ambitious conservative from Texas, and the Democrats end up with a socialist? Surely liberals would be deeply troubled by their own party’s hard left turn?

    1. On NBC Nightly News yesterday, they simply referred to him as having “quirky politics.”

  27. The new Megadeth is very, very good.

    Drummer from Lamb of God, interesting how much a good drummer makes a difference. Guitarist from Angra. I’m one of the metalheads who digs Mustaine’s crazy Infowars lyrics.

    1. I was never big on Mustaine, but what I have heard from the new album, it is growing on me.

      1. The other thing, I remember when Dave seemed to be a flaming liberal back in the late 80s, early 90s. Then I didn’t really pay much attention to him. Then about 6-7 years ago (??) all of a sudden he is all in with the black helicopter crowd. Didn’t he become “born again” or something?

        1. Didn’t he become “born again” or something?

          Happens a lot with ex-junkies

          1. Like “Head” Welch from Korn.

            I get it. And I don’t have a problem with born-agains, other than their prosletyzing. But as long as they don’t force me to listen, I am cool.

            Hell, I don’t care what a musician’s politics or religion is (except Amon Amarth, when I listen to them, it is the equivalent of Catholics going to Mass!). Unless they preach during the concert, or their shit is incredibly infused with it. Like RATM (Of course, I hate their style as well as their politics). But I can listed to Audioslave all day long. As political as Tom Morello is, I think Zack de la Rocha is the heart of their douchebaggery.

            1. “Korn gives god ‘Head'”

              “RATM does not condone or support the use of its music in war compilation footage.” Pay no attention to our calls for riots and anarchy; we dont support violence.

              Musicians are not prized for their intellectual fortitude

              1. Candyasses. Especially RATM: Well-to-do suburban radicals without the stomach to back-up the “Rage” they sing about. When I/we say or do something in our Music we mean it, otherwise what’s the point? And BearOdinson: Listening to AA is the Pagan equivalent of going to mass.

    2. His lyrics maybe interesting. His vocals however are the Headbanging equivalent of dragging your balls across barbed wire.

      1. So… you like them?

        I’ve never thought he was a great vocalist, but I’ve always thought his vocals fit well with their overall sound.

        1. They are probably the 1 thing that has prevented me from buying anything other than Killing is My Business over the last 30+ years. His voice is the proverbial finger nail across a black board to me. Its not that he has a bad voice (technically) or that they don’t fit, It just grates on my ears like no tomorrow.

    3. Fucking fantastic.

      Don’t miss the cameo by Bill Cosby at 2:10.

  28. as long as it takes…

    NY Post: How long can Hillary Clinton hide in a parallel universe?

    Hillary Clinton’s defense of her seemingly criminal mishandling of the nation’s secrets now looks to be pretty much, I live in a parallel universe.

    The latest: She insists the e-mail story is still in the news only because some “people are selectively leaking and making comments that have no basis in anything I’m aware of.”

    That’s what she told CNN’s Alisyn Camerota on Monday ? just three days after the State Department announced it can’t release 22 of her e-mails because they’re too dense with highly classified information.

    1. People inside her bubble will only hear her version of events. None of the sites they read will mention the 22 e-mails unless it is to speculate that they weren’t classified at the time. She knows how to play this game, and she has the right party affiliation to pull it off.

    2. Why do reporters suck at this sort of thing so bad?

      the State Department announced it can’t release 22 of her e-mails because they’re too dense with highly classified information.

      No, idiot. It can’t release them at all because they have any classified information in them. The fact that it’s TS is a consideration, but Sec. or Con. wouldn’t be releasable either. The “density” of the “secretness” or whatever has absolutely nothing to do with releaseability.

      1. I think those are the 22 that Congresscritters can’t even look at, and the IG of State had to get an increased security clearance for.

        There’s classified, and then there’s “our sleeper agent in Moscow is Dmitri Deadguy, and he just sent us some great stuff!”

  29. Hillary Collapse 2.0 Is Now Underway!

    On the other side of the aisle, the Democrats are speaking more openly about the fact that they’re losing their minds:

    In her speech Monday at Drake University, Clinton ? as she has done at appearances all over the state ? rattled off a laundry list of programs she’d enact as president. But Sanders scored big with younger voters ? 70 percent of those under-30 backed him ? on the strength of his simple message of change. One Sanders precinct captain summed up the difference while rallying the troops: “Vote your heart, not your mind.”

    Don’t let any Hillary fan tell you this wasn’t a collapse. She was ahead by 12 in mid-January. She came out last night for a not-quite-victory, not-quite concession speech decked out in blood red and glaring angrily and hard in her tone. If I were Bernie Sanders, I might call Ken Starr to see what’s coming my way.

    1. Sanders: Hope and Change 2.0

    2. Yep, the party has fallen in love. Hill’s making a fight of it like no other Dem can, but she can’t win the Dem base without being likeable.

      1. I think the question of whether Sanders can reach more non-whites is pretty legit. If he can show some inroads, I’d say he’s golden.

        1. I’m not so sure he hasn’t. The whole meme about him having no pull with blacks seems to be in the same vein as the Bernie bro. Hill’s supporters just keep repeating it in the hopes people will believe it.

    3. Out of your mind! Vote Bernie.

    4. One Sanders precinct captain summed up the difference while rallying the troops: “Vote your heart, not your mind.”

      Their preferred politics are as mindless as possible. At least some of them are being open about it.

    1. The metallic laugh is unnerving.

    2. I warned you stoooooopid mammals about this

  30. I heard a lot of people last night saying they think Rubio is going to win because of his strong showing in Iowa, but I have no idea where you guys are coming from. All the other establishment candidates got crushed – Rand Paul beat both Jeb and Kasich. Where is Rubio’s additional support going to come from? If Trump loses a bunch of states early and either a) drops out or b) his supporters start going to other candidates, it’s pretty clear they’re going to prefer Cruz to Rubio. Furthermore, fourth place was Ben Carson. His support is mostly evangelical, and who won the evangelicals last night? Ted Cruz. Carson drops out and Cruz is going to pick up more of his supporters than Rubio is.

    So three of the top four candidates are anti-establishment (actually 4 of 5 if you count Rand Paul) whereas there is no other establishment candidate who is performing well enough for Rubio to win by sucking up their supporters once they exit the race. He could still win, but I think it’s pretty clear Cruz has a much better chance of winning the nomination than Rubio. If Rubio won the nomination, I do think he’d have a much better chance in the general election, but he’s in a pretty tough spot given his Gang of 8 support and a generally anti-establishment electorate.

    1. Most of my proggie FB fans are calling it for Rubio, don’t know what exactly that means. I gather that it’s because Cruz is icky and talks funny, but beyond that, I know not where that comes from.

    2. I tend to agree. And Rubio is essentially a post 9/11 GWB all over again. (I say post 9/11, because before 9/11 he was against “nation building”).

      Don’t get me wrong, if Rubio got the nod, I will still vote for him (I know he is still for the WOD) only because I really think he would be much better than the criminal or the nationalist socialist.

    3. If Rubio won the nomination, I do think he’d have a much better chance in the general election

      Depends mostly on whether he can somehow convince the base that he isn’t an establishment tool. The base is showing they don’t want to vote for an establishment tool.

      Now, can an establishment tool pick up enough independents to make up for a weak base turnout? Let’s ask McCain and Romney.

  31. Guardian closes all comments on articles about race, immigration, and Islam unless “the moderators knew they had the capacity to support the conversation and that they believed a positive debate was possible”

    1. Who are they kidding, they rarely had the comments open on those subjects anyway.

      I think it is such a mistake to drive all opposing views underground. But it the way Europe intends to proceed.

    2. It’s funny because if you go to Guardian comments you virtually never see anything actually bigoted – at least not against groups the left likes. It’s not Breitbart where any story about race or immigration turns into weird conversations about dirty Mexicans takin’ err jerbs.

      Basically the Guardian just thinks any deviation from leftist orthodoxy is so terrible it can’t be allowed, even if it’s completely reasonable.

    3. Hmm, allow for rational public documented counter arguments to be fielded against racist and bigotted arguments

      OR

      “LALALALALALALA! I can’t hear you!”

  32. Clinton has declared victory in the state’s caucus.

    If you call a dog’s tail a leg, how many legs does a dog have?

    1. Oh, but I see Fist already nailed this.

  33. The U.S. national debt has hit $19 trillion.

    A trillion here, a trillion there, and pretty soon you’re talking about real money.

  34. Hillary Clinton Has The Most Statistically Improbable Coin-Toss Luck Ever

    One of the most bizarre details to emerge from Monday’s Iowa caucuses was that in six Democratic counties, the ownership of six delegates was decided by a coin flip.

    A single delegate remained unassigned at the end of caucusing in two precincts in Des Moines, one precinct in Ames, one in Newton, one in West Branch and one in Davenport, The Des Moines Register reported.

    In all six instances, the coin toss was won by former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton over Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders.

    There may have been more coin tosses, but those are the ones we know about for now.

    1. David Rutz ?@DavidRutz 22m22 minutes ago
      Bernie Sanders lost all coin tosses last night because his supporters rejected using currency representative of the corrupt establishment

    2. Double sided coin.

      1. It’s actually a really easy sleight to do, even with an honest coin. Not that Hillary’s team would ever do such a dastardly thing.

        1. I’m going to give Hillary a benefit of the doubt she most certainly doesn’t deserve and assume she didn’t load her delegates with people who know how to flip a coin on the off chance she needs it to come down to a coin flip.

          But that is it from me for giving her the benefit of the doubt on some sort of corruption.

    3. “Democracy”. Although representation via coin flip is actually about right for most Americans.

  35. The chicken nuggets shall rise again!

    Students clash over waving Confederate flags in school cafeteria

    West Port High School reports three students brought in small Confederate flags to the Ocala, Florida school and waived them during lunch, which offended several black students. The Ocala Star Banner described the three white students ? two boys and one girl ? as “taunting” other students with the flags.

    At one point, the mini flag waving students sparked a confrontation with a black female student, who punched one of her classmates. That student was issued a citation to appear in court, while the other flag waiving students “are being dealt with swiftly and harshly,” the Banner reports.

    The flags also apparently instigated a black student rally in the school cafeteria, with black students shouting “black power” in videos that were recorded and later posted online, according to the news site.

    1. You know who else charged on the confederate flag?…

      1. The Dukes of Hazard?

      2. Not General McClellan?

    2. The flags also apparently instigated a black student rally in the school cafeteria, with black students shouting “black power” in videos that were recorded and later posted online, according to the news site.

      I’m sure they will be dealt with just as harshly as the kids waving the little flags.

      1. I wouldn’t be half surprised if the student who punched the flag waiver gets acquitted or merely slapped on the wrist because any real or perceived white racism is often seen as a justification for assault.

  36. The kid here is a friend of a friend.

    tl;dr on the article: He was in an accident on a terrible corner, and his passenger died. He admitted to a cop (yeah, yeah) that he had smoked “a few puffs” of marijuana a few hours earlier. His THC levels were below what would be considered a positive test in most circumstances. There were highway experts that testified that it was a horribly dangerous corner that likely caused the accident.

    He was convicted of homicide by vehicle and faces 15 years in prison.

    1. There is no tragedy the police cannot make worse.

      1. Hey, don’t leave the prosecutors out of it!

    2. Wait–

      On January 19, Mueller rejected a plea offer from the Jefferson County District Attorney’s Office that would have made him admit guilt to a lesser count: homicide by negligent operation of a vehicle. The plea came with a prosecution recommendation of six months in jail and five years of probation.

      This isn’t actually a ‘lesser charge’. This is what happened. He got into an accident and killed his passenger. He should have slowed and been more careful. And he apparently knew this was a bad turn.

      So why not take it and a tearful plea at sentencing that gets it reduced to probation(maybe)?

  37. How Ted Cruz Engineered His Iowa Triumph

    A meticulous, technologically advanced, highly individualized groundgame?and legalized fireworks?trumped a certain outsider candidate.

    For the closing days of the Iowa campaign, Cruz’s campaign had defined such pools for each of his major opponents as part of what was known internally as the Oorlog Project, named by a Cruz data scientist who searched online for “war” translated into different languages and thought the Afrikaner word looked coolest. It was just the latest way that Cruz’s analytics department had tried to slice the Iowa caucus electorate in search of an advantage for its candidate. They had divided voters by faction, self-identified ideology, religious belief, personality type?creating 150 different clusters of Iowa caucus-goers?down to sixty Iowa Republicans its statistical models showed as likely to share Cruz’s desire to end a state ban on fireworks sales.

    Unlike most of his opponents, Cruz has put a voter-contact specialist in charge of his operation, and it shows in nearly every aspect of the campaign he has run thus far and intends to sustain through a long primary season. Cruz, it should be noted, had no public position on Iowa’s fireworks law until his analysts identified sixty votes that could potentially be swayed because of it.

    1. I too can be swayed with the lure of legal fireworks.

      1. I too can be swayed with the lure of legal fireworks.

        Noted.

    2. Ted Cruz had this “meticulous, technologically advanced, highly individualized groundgame” before the results came in – how come you weren’t telling us beforehand how and why Cruz was going to win Iowa? And if the MTAHIG is the reason, well, Ted’s taking it into New Hampshire and beyond so everybody else can just go home because Cruz can’t lose with this weapon, right? All these after-the-fact “explanations” for why something happened don’t mean jack if you can’t explain what’s going to happen before it happens. Next week there’s going to be tons of people explaining why the Superbowl results were readily foreseeable to anybody with a brain, too. But not a one of them is telling you now what’s going to happen. (What’s the Vegas odds on the Superbowl being no-contested due to a terrorist attack? But a terrorist attack is going to have everybody screaming about how they should have seen this coming, it was so obvious.)

  38. My money is still on John Kasich.

    1. to do what

      1. Handjobs for votes?

        1. He will tell you he has the best record on hand jobs, hands down.

  39. Sacramento Kings plan t-shirt giveaway for Chinese New Year. It’s the Year of the Monkey. It’s also the beginning of Black History Month.

    Hilarity did not ensue.

    1. Labelling the shirts “The month of the monkey” probably didn’t help.

  40. SF city gov decides that those who work for the school district ought to find it harder to rent living quarters:
    (paywall, but you get the point)

    “S.F. school workers get reprieve from evictions under supe’s plan”
    […]
    “Tenants who work in San Francisco’s schools would be safeguarded from eviction during the academic year under controversial legislation to be introduced by Supervisor David Campos on Tuesday.”

  41. Little birthday shoutout to Hamilton today!

    1. Why thanks 🙂

  42. Our per capita debt is larger than Norway’s per capita oil reserves (current oil price).

  43. So I think White women are about to overtake White men as the most hated group in progressive America. There has been a ground swell of resentment towards their essential running of the entire SJW movement for building for years. Now XX has published multiple articles on how white women are failing other minorities.

    One on how the abortion movement got in the way of Latina women trying to prevent doctors from sterilizing them against their will:

    http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_…..burger_bar

    And one about how despite white women making up the majority of the publishing industry, this has led to essentially no other minority representation:

    http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_…..burger_bar

    1. Ah, the delicious taste of schadenfraude!!

    2. “The Pride of the Feminist Commonwealth disembarked from Feelingsistan last weekend on its Neednoman voyage. Regrettably, the Pride struck an obstacle, a selfishnessburg, and began to sink. Reports from that event suggest the white feminists on board, once the shining examples from Allytopia, were cannibalized and flagellated for allowing the Pride to sink.

      The reported words of the vessel’s captain, Fuhrer Cisdestroyer, a trans black lesbian, were “No way my ass goes down with this ship. Captains have experienced a history of oppression when it comes to doomed vessels, and I am the most oppressed individual here. Me first.

      All souls aboard were lost in the icy waters of the Reality Ocean. We are just now getting word that the lifeboats were unloaded, as the SJWs and Feminists could not figure out who was the least privileged before the vessel finally sank.”

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