A.M. Links: Bernie vs. Hillary, Bush Sr. Disses Cheney in New Biography, Denver Police Union Fights Body Camera Policy

• In an interview with The Wall Street Journal, Bernie Sanders attacked Hillary Clinton for her many flip flops on policy issues. Consistency "does speak to the character of a person," Sanders said.

• A forthcoming biography of George H.W. Bush contains numerous harsh comments about the famous team of advisers surrounding his son George W. Bush. Donald Rumsfeld, George H.W. Bush said, was "an arrogant fellow," while Dick Cheney was an "iron-ass" who tried to create "his own empire" in the White House.

• Officials in Russia and Egypt are dismissing as mere "speculation" the idea that an ISIS bomb brought down a Russian airliner over Egypt's Sinai Peninsula. British Prime Minister David Cameron, however, insists that a bomb "more likely than not" was the cause of the crash.

• The Denver police union has filed a lawsuit challenging the department's new policy requiring cops to wear body cameras.

• "US lawmakers and federal watchdogs on Tuesday derided the Transportation Security Administration's ability, or lack thereof, to adequately detect weapons and other contraband during the passenger screening process at the nation's airports."

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• Representative Government Is a Fiction If we really live under a representative government, how can a president take the country to war in Syria without even a show vote in Congress? By Sheldon Richman

• How to Deal with Transgender Students in the Locker Room A smart solution requires a willingness to compromise. By Steve Chapman

• Left and Right Should Condemn Crony Capitalist War on Herbalife William Ackman's self-serving activism is shameful. By Veronique de Rugy

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

The Denver police union has filed a lawsuit challenging the department's new policy requiring cops to wear body cameras.

Compromise: off switch.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

Harro.

Cop Unions prepare to fight back against the War on Cops. Minorities and dogs hardest hit.

[Rufus The Monocled Derp Slayer]

Hello.

[Just a thought not a sermon]

Hello! I'm Kid Kangol, from UTFO. She said "So?" I said, "So, baby don't you know? I can rap, sing, and dance at just one show!"

[Ken Shultz]

Hello.

Civil disobedience is still disobedience.

Bonk, bonk on the head!

[Just a thought not a sermon]

109) The item from last night about the 11-year old charged with distributing child pornography reminds me of a story from when I was a kid. At some point, my little brother (about age 4) took my mom's camera and took pictures of himself with his pants off. Why? I have no idea. But when my mom went to pick up the developed film from the K-Mart photo center those photos were quite a surprise. Thank God this was the mid-1980s, before America went insane. I'm sure the person developing the film simply had a good laugh. Can you imagine if that happened today? My parents would've been lucky to avoid a CPS investigation.

[Crusty Juggler]

Pics? Wait...ummmm, on second thought no pics.

[Swiss Servator]

Leave that to OMWC.

[Old Man With Candy]

Why is it so damn hard for you people to understand that child molesters aren't always gay? I feel othered and microaggressed. No, make that MACROaggressed, you shitlords.

[GILMORE?]

"child molesters aren't always gay'"

unless they're Catholic!

[Pope Jimbo]

Well if they were pics of him goofing around after a bubble bath, your mom could have lost her job coaching college football.

Todd Hoffner is not a child molester. The videos on his phone were those of his own children. In dismissing the charges against him three months later, a judge labeled the videos "playful and silly." They were taken after his kids, then ages 9, 8, and 5, had taken a bubble bath.

http://time.com/70230/todd-hof.....e-mankato/

ps. This poor guy finally ended up leaving his job at Mankato because of this nonsense. Even though he was cleared of everything.

[Elspeth Flashman]

I had a friend in the early 90's who did film developing. If they found something "odd" they would still do the negative for the customer, just not make a print.

[Griffin3]

I hate this crap. I have some great memories in my digital collection, one of my kids laughing and playing with the water while he could still take a bath in the kitchen sink. But, if I had the sense god gave a goose, I'd delete those, before it was eventually used to hang me on kiddie porn charges.

[Fist of Etiquette]

US lawmakers and federal watchdogs on Tuesday derided the Transportation Security Administration's ability, or lack thereof, to adequately detect weapons and other contraband during the passenger screening process at the nation's airports.

The remedy? More, more, more.

[A Cynic's Guide to Zen]

That's how the Russians took Mamayev Kurgan. "Damn the losses, we must take that hill! All deserters will be shot!"

[DEATFBIRSECIA]

How do you like it? How do you like it?

[Jerryskids]

In the beginning there was the plan.
And then came the assumptions.
And the assumptions were without form.
And the plan was completely without substance.

And darkness fell upon the face of the workers.
And they spoke amongst themselves saying:
"It is a crock of shit, and it stinkith!"
And the workers went unto their Supervisors and sayeth:
"It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof!"

And the Supervisors went unto the Managers and sayeth unto them:
"It is a container of excrement and it is very strong,
such that none may abide by it!"

And the Managers went unto their Directors and sayent:
"It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength!"

And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying to one another:
"It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong!"

And the Directors went unto the Vice Presidents and sayeth:
"It promotes growth and is very powerful!"

And the Vice Presidents went unto the President and sayeth unto him:
This new plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency
of this company, and these areas in particular...."

And the President looked upon the plan,
and saw that it was good,
and the Plan became Policy.

[Unreconstructed (Sans Flag)]

Consider this stolen.

[Fist of Etiquette]

So no one's going to quote Billy Idol?

[Swiss Servator]

-1 sneer, leather and fire

[Lord Humungus]

Ted Cruz Doesn't Care If He 'Accidentally' Blows Off Someone's Head With A Shotgun

The muzzle of Ted Cruz's break-action gun is pointing all over the place ? at the buildings, at people who might be behind him, but he doesn't know because he's not looking over his shoulder ? instead of at the ground, in front of him, where he can see it. That's where you are supposed to point your gun, even if if if if and if. Always.

As a passionate gun enthusiast and advocate for completely unregulated gun ownership ? a position very few gun owners, including NRA members, agree with ? Cruz should not only know better, but he should show better. He should be a model of responsible gun ownership, not just a blowhard in a hunting costume, posing with his deadly long-arm prop and making silly ads about wrapping bacon around his dick. Sorry, "machine gun." That is, if he's the gun enthusiast he claims to be and has ever shot a gun when the cameras aren't rolling.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Dammit. You're supposed to stick to Salon.

Popehat said it best. I mean, I guess he could use the gun as a club to beat someone over the head, but otherwise...

[straffinrun]

Juvenile Bluster gave us a bonus, so he gets the win.

[Lord Humungus]

ha - first is the win

[Atanarjuat]

A "passionate gun enthusiast" who thinks guns are just props that represent the gun owner's dick?

"Ice Bear is highly dubious".

[PBR Streetgang]

We Bare Bears is awesome.

[Agammamon]

I saw this the other day - the stupid shit people find to nitpick on.

The gun was broken open. It is physically impossible for the gun to fire in this condition. No possible failure could get it to fire.

You could just as well complain about someone who holds a bullet in his hand - is it pointing in a safe direction?

[Pope Jimbo]

What if while he is blustering a swallow flies up with a live round it found in the field and stuffs it into the barrel? And then what if a wood pecker flies up to attach the swallow, but misses with a mighty peck and accidentally hits the primer?

Yeah, what about that smarty pants?

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

But that thing-that-goes-up could still hurt someone.

[DJF]

""" break-action gun"""

The gun is open and has no shells in it and can't fire

[Homple]

A few years back, somebody published the same sort of jackassery about a similar picture of Sarah Palin. Comments were numerous and unkind to the author.

[Princess Trigger]

I did not know 'Wonkette' was still in business.

So I learned something useless from that article.

[CJR]

Yeah. Different shooting sports have different standards for safety, right or wrong. A lot of serious gun people forget that (or don't care), but that's how it is.

That said, if you're going to carry your double gun broken open over your shoulder, hold it by the barrels. That way you can easily see into the chamber, as well as control where your muzzle is pointing.

[Fist of Etiquette]

British Prime Minister David Cameron, however, insists that a bomb "more likely than not" was the cause of the crash.

It's like these guys never heard the word crisitunity.

[Juvenile Bluster]

In an absolute shocker, Wonkette knows absolutely nothing about guns, claims a broken, unloaded shotgun held over the shoulder is dangerous.

Bonus: The author's reaction after being corrected by Charles CW Cooke.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

OMGicanteven

#ugh

[Crusty Juggler]

She rants, she snarks, and she makes feminism fun.

[Krabappel]

Being corrected for your stupidity is problematic.

[Raven Nation]

And she's getting eviscerated in her Twitter feed.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

The responses to her Twittering are pretty funny.

[Crusty Juggler]

She rants and snarks and makes feminism fun.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

I have to admit, seeing morons like her being torn apart of the idiocy she spouts is indeed quite fun. So she succeeded, I guess.

[Anomalous]

She rants and snarksderps and make feminism funlook ridiculous.

FTFY.

[Trouser-Pod (The blowhard)]

Of course, she posts little tantrums like this: Demanding gun owners demonstrate extreme caution at all times was not a mistake. Thanks, internet. Now fuck off.

You brought it on yourself, sweetheart. Just go ahead and shove it, you know, right back up your ass. then you can fuck off.

[See Double You]

I'll give a guy trying to correct me when I'm clearly wrong four problematics.

#everythingsaproblem

[KDN]

Of the billion or so ways to spell a name that combines "Kay" and "Leigh," that might be the most obnoxious.

[Lord Humungus]

World's largest cat painting sells for $826,000 in New York

A work of art believed to be the world's largest painting of cats -- featuring 42 felines on a 75-inch-by-102-inch canvas -- sold for $826,000 in New York.

Sotheby's in New York announced the painting, My Wife's Lovers by Austrian artist Carl Kahler, sold Monday morning for the staggering sum after first going on display Friday at the auction house on a wall specially constructed for the oversized piece.

Polly Sartori, head of 19th century European paintings for Sotheby's in New York, said Kahler had traveled to the West Coast of the United States in 1881 and he encountered art collector Kate Johnson in San Francisco.

[Atanarjuat]

Do we really need a painting of 42 cats when people are going hungry in this country?

[Rhywun]

They're not playing poker, so no.

[Crusty Juggler]

Clay Aiken and Ruben Studdard are really hurting for work.

[Swiss Servator]

*standing ovation*

[pan fried wylie]

a wall specially constructed for the oversized piece

Pretty sure I have a number of walls that big, wtf Sotheby's.

[db]

The unnamed proxy bidder reportedly later was heard speaking on the phone to an irate caller saying "I told you I wanted the world's largest painting of PUSSY! YOU'RE FIRED!"

[Just a thought not a sermon]

"Bernie Sanders attacked Hillary Clinton for her many flip flops on policy issues"

You know what? I have a spot for curmudgeonly old guys railing against everything they think is wrong with the world. I can sense myself turning into one myself as I age. But you know what else? Shaking your fist at the kids isn't really enough to qualify you for president.

[Jerryskids]

"Flip-flops" can also be described as "changing your opinions as you learn new things" just as well as "consistency" in one's opinions can be described as being "too goddamned stupid to have learned anything in 75 fucking years".

[Raven Nation]

Good point on changing opinions. But it would be helpful if people would articulate why they changed their opinion.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

But it would be helpful if people would articulate why they changed their opinion.

"It was politically expedient and I'm a whore for poll results" doesn't really sell as well as not saying anything.

[Citizen X]

President Sanders's very first executive action will be a requirement that everybody get off of his lawn.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

Only after he nationalizes lawns.

[Citizen X]

Ok, second executive action.

[Krabappel]

Second action not needed - once the lawns are nationalized they will all turn into run down shit holes that no one will want to be on anymore.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Donald Rumsfeld, George H.W. Bush said, was "an arrogant fellow," while Dick Cheney was an "iron-ass" who tried to create "his own empire" in the White House.

One wonders if the elder Bush ever bothered relaying these conclusions to his son during the administration.

[DJF]

Didn't both Rumsfeld and Cheney work for HW Bush. If he had fired them maybe they never would have gotten into his sons administration

[Bo Cara Esq.]

I don't think Rumsfeld did. He worked for Ford, Nixon, & W, but not H IIRC.

[Lee G]

Apparently Bush Sr worked to get Rumsfeld replaced.

And the distinction between Cheney circa 1990 and Cheney post-9/11 is startling. It's really like two different people. Bush Sr seems to blame Lynne Cheney for a portion of it.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Just my opinion, but if you take out the actual policies that Cheney worked on/toward, he was otherwise just about the perfect VP.

He had no further political ambitions, which meant he could act as a lightning rod.
He was an 'iron ass' who took control of the bureaucratic empire that already existed in the White House.
This needs to be said to every member of congress on a weekly basis.

Take out that he was a war monger, he was otherwise exactly what I'd want in a VP, were I president.

There was absolutely nothing redeeming about Rummy, though.

[Chinny Chin Chin]

Truth.

Come to think of it, this could be said of lots of folks.

If you take out the killing and eating of other folks, John Wayne Gacy made a great clown for kids' parties.

[Citizen X]

If you take out the genocidal megalomania, Mao Zedong was a powerful advocate for holistic wellness.

(Hat tip: mtrueman)

[commodious spittoon]

"Iron-ass" is a very offensive term for victims of rectal polio. Bush should apologize.

[Bubba Jones]

GHWB launched decades of futile war with a half assed invasion of Kuwait/Iraq. His occupation of Saudi Arabia was a key motivation for 9/11.

Not sure why anyone gives a fuck what he thinks about anything.

[tarran]

The U.S. did not occupy Saudi Arabia.

They were invited by the monarch to assist in the defense of his kingdom. Osama Bin Laden was pissed because he thought that the Saudi's should use mujaheddin tactics to defeat any Iraqi invasion.

It was no more an occupation than the Berlin Airlift.

[Bubba Jones]

There were armed Christian troops driving all over the holy land. In the eyes of our enemies, it's a distinction without a difference.

I would argue that unnecessarily stirring up a suicidal rage against us was a diplomatic failure. Which is ironic because Reagan was supposedly the war monger, and GHWB the pragmatist. No invasion of Kuwait, no deployment in Saudi Arabia, and none of this shit happens.

[tarran]

There were armed Christian troops driving all over the holy land.

No there weren't. There were whole provinces that were off limits, and U.S. forces stuck only to the areas the monarch agreed to.

I mean, I am opposed to the U.S. alliance with Saudi Arabia, and think it's been a bad deal. But the notion that the U.S. was occupying Saudi Arabia is bullshit propaganda. I can imagine some illiterate Bedoin down on his luck falling for it, but an American?!?

[Calidissident]

It wasn't an occupation in the sense of a hostile military engagement, but a whole lot of Muslims don't give a shit if the Saudi monarch approves it. You say that as if the Saudi King's legitimacy to speak for all his people (and Muslims worldwide) is obvious unquestionable.

[tarran]

but a whole lot of Muslims don't give a shit if the Saudi monarch approves it

Nonetheless that doesn't make the construction and manning of military bases an occupation.

No land was seized. No property forcibly occupied. It's like arguing that the Hessians occupied the U.S. colonies during the War of Independence.

[Lord Humungus]

Bloomberg: We're winning the war against coal

Here's some good news that many Americans may not realize: Domestically, we are winning the fight against the carbon pollution that drives climate change. And by doing so, we are giving President Obama a strong hand to play when world leaders gather at the U.N.'s climate summit in Paris in five weeks to negotiate a global agreement to limit carbon emissions.

To understand how the White House finds itself in this position of strength, think back to 2010, when Congress failed to pass a cap-and-trade bill. That seemed to end any hopes of making major reductions in emissions and demonstrating American resolve to the global community. But in fact, even though the bill did not become law, the United States has already exceeded the carbon reduction goals it aimed to reach.

According to a study being released Wednesday by the Sierra Club and Bloomberg Philanthropies, 2015 U.S. economy-wide carbon emissions are even lower than they would have been had the bill passed. In fact, the United States can now say it has led the world in reducing carbon pollution over the last decade.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

We're winning the war against a large industry that has lifted millions out of poverty, yay!

[Mickey Rat]

And the energy source that the USA has about the largest proven reserves of in the world.

[Restoras]

Well, it'll still be there when we need it.

[Just a thought not a sermon]

Thanks to the innovative oil- and gasmen of Texas and North Dakota! And free markets!

"we are giving President Obama a strong hand to play when world leaders gather at the U.N.'s climate summit in Paris in five weeks"

Not if they pay any attention to who's actually responsible for our lowered carbon emissions!

[Atanarjuat]

Holy fuck, didn't they just have a climate summit in some exotic location a few weeks ago? That is the best scam since the Catholic church.

[Sapient Mulch]

+1 golden idol

[SFC B]

The catholic church at least had the decency to open some schools and hospitals with the profits from their scam.

[db]

Climate reeducation camps will make up for that.

[B.P.]

Also thanks to the tanking of the economy.

[MetalBard]

Why do advanced western societies choose to fight against the very thing that makes their advanced lifestyle possible? That might as well have a war against farms.

[Krabappel]

The EPA is working on that one with their water regulations.

[SugarFree]

And they wonder why Bevins won in Kentucky.

[PBR Streetgang]

^^^^ this right here! Progressives complain about dumb hicks "voting against their own interests" when they fail to vote D. Maybe The pride Democrats show in trying to destroy their jobs could be a reason?

[gaoxiaen]

Kind of like Reagan voters that used to be steelworkers.

[OneOut]

.Also breaking news:

95 million =/- Americans remain out of the workforce.

[MSimon]

plant food = carbon pollution

[Derpetologist]

\=/GOP GUN\=/

On March 3, 1969 the United States Republican Party established an elite school for the top one percent of its candidates. Its purpose was to teach the lost art of pandering and to insure* that the handful of men who graduated were the best weasels in the world. They succeeded. Today, the RNC calls it Candidate Debating School. The candidates call it: GOP GUN.

NEER NEERNEER NEERNUH NEERNUH NEERNEER NEERNUH NEER NEERNUH NEER NEERNUH NEERNEER!

*Yes, they used the wrong word in the movie. There were many other errors, such as one of fighter pilot instructors wearing an Antarctic Service Badge and the fact that it is impossible for an ejecting pilot/crewmember to hit his head on the canopy. The chair extends above head height and has a breaking device in the event the canopy does not blast off during the ejection sequence.

[Derpetologist]

***

"Good morning, Gentlemen. My blood sugar is 110," said a sweaty Christie, AKA True Heart.

"Holy shit, it's True Heart!" said Bush, AKA Eveready.

"True Heart's here, great...oh shit..." said Rubio, AKA Gator.

"Great, he's probably saying 'Holy shit, it's Justice Never Sleeps and Eveready',
said Rand Paul, AKA Justice Never Sleeps.

"Yeah, I'm sure he's saying that" said Harley.

"OK everyone, put your personalized helmets on, stick your arms out, and run around while making jet noises. Then run up behind someone and criticize them", explained True Heart.

***

"You two really are cowboys", said Huckabee, AKA Duck Hunter.

"What's your problem, Huckabee?", asked Justice Never Sleeps.

"You're everyone's problem. That's because every time you go on TV, you're unsafe. I don't like you because you're dangerous."

"That's right! Dick... Hunter. I am dangerous."

Duck Hunter menancingly chomped his teeth.

[Derpetologist]

***

"I ran with your old man back in 2008. You're a lot like he was. Only better... and worse. He was a natural heroic son of a bitch that one," said True Heart.

"So he did do it right", said Justice Never Sleeps.

"Yeah, he did it right... Is that why you campaign the way you do? Trying to prove something? Yeah, your old man did it right. What I'm about to tell you is really obvious. It could end your career. We were in the worst campaign I ever dreamed of. There were scandals like fireflies all over the sky. His newsletters got hit, and he was wounded, but he could've made it back. He stayed in it, denied being racist before he bought it" said True Heart.

"How come I never heard that before?" asked Justice Never Sleeps.

"Well, that's not something the people like to talk about when crazy newsletters from 20 years ago surface" explained True Heart.

***

Justice Never Sleeps clutches Ron Paul's old Life Alert bracelet before hurling it into the DC reflecting pool.

[Derpetologist]

***

list of GOP candidate self-given Secret Service codenames:

Chris Christie -- True Heart
John Kasich -- Unit One
Carly Fiorina -- Secretariat
Scott Walker -- Harley
Jeb Bush -- Eveready
Donald Trump -- Humble
Ben Carson -- One Nation
Ted Cruz -- Cohiba
Marco Rubio -- Gator
Mike Huckabee -- Duck Hunter
Rand Paul -- Justice Never Sleeps

[MSimon]

If Fiorina wins will she be providing stud service?

[Derpetologist]

I was not the only one who noticed that True Heart is the name of a Care Bear

[tarran]

My CO in the Navy was the XO of Top Gun when the movie was made.

He said they school had a huge fight with the guys making the movie. The original script had something like 5 plane crashes and all kinds of insanity.

What made it to the movie theaters had 85% of the bullshit removed.

Incidentally, the scene with the planes flying canopy to canopy? Editing room tricks. My CO said the movie guys wanted to film it live action, and kept demanding the planes fly closer. My CO pulled the plug; explaining that there was this thing called the Bernoulli effect, and if they tried to fly any closer than they were, they would get two of the crashes they were looking for.

Interestingly he said all the actors were very excited to go flying except Val Kilmer who absolutely refused to set foot in the back seat of an F-14.

[Agammamon]

The Bernoulli effect would have been the *last* thing to worry about. Both those planes have vertical stabilizers that would have prevented them from getting close enough without hitting each other,

[tarran]

My goodness, I should email Admiral Willard and tell him he was wrong, and that the forces he was feeling whilst at the controls of the inverted aircraft were only in his imagination! 😉

[NotAnotherSkippy]

I would be more worried about aerodynamic effects. Plenty of potential sources of vorticies to be shed causing a transient leading to an impact.

[tarran]

He said getting the planes at the same speed, one inverted over the other was difficult. The closer they flew the harder it was to maintain a constant separation. And the director kept saying "OK let's try it again, but closer!"

Willard was flying the inverted aircraft, and I expect the closer they flew, the more he had to pitch the nose up (thus meaning the tails of the aircraft were the closest parts of the a/c to each other - pace Agammamon). He said the whole exercise was unsafe, unrealistic, and an accident waiting to happen. When he was telling my watch team the story on the bridge, I got the sense that he had hated the idea from the get-go.

[NotAnotherSkippy]

Yes, I agree. Ground effect is a real thing and when you bring another wing close to yours that too is going to disturb the air. Plus you are always shedding wing tip vorticies which would create unpredictable roll forces.

[sarcasmic]

Meet the boy geniuses who developed a math theorem that calculates problems faster than a COMPUTER - despite still being in high school

Teen pair developed a mathematical theorem while still in high school
Xuming Liang and Ivan Zelich, both 17, met on an online math forum
Found they were working on the same problem and helped each other
Theorem took six months to perfect and may now change math forever
Calculations have potential to prove complex theories about the universe
Theorem may also one day lead to intergalactic space travel, pair say

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....chool.html

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

Damned kids and their New Math....

[Lee G]

That's awesome. It's nice to see high school age kids celebrated for something other than athletics.

[Princess Trigger]

And Sexting.

[gaoxiaen]

And jenkhum.

[Rhywun]

Call me when they build a clock.

[Lee G]

+1 Presidential Award

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

The caption to one of the pictures:

The child genius' ultimate goal is to one day find the theory of everything. He also would like to fully understand the brain to be able to improve his own, so it would be capable of finding the answers to life and the universe

So the answer to their theorem OT/OH = O'T'/O'H' = 42.

Or they've magnificently managed to spoof the Daily Fail.

[Jerryskids]

So what's the big deal? When I was in school I could solve math problems faster than a computer could, too. Hell, I could solve a math problem before a computer operator could even get half the punchcards done.

[OneOut]

Yeah but did they invent a clock and go to the White House and then move to the Middle East so they could become real bomb makers for real ?

Phssst. on math

[Lord Humungus]

Toddler bites, kills poisonous snake he found in his backyard

The child was immediately taken to a Mostardas hospital due to fears that he had been bitten by the snake, but doctors could not find any injuries or symptoms of poisoning, concluding that the boy was in good health. Doctors determined Lorenzo had apparently bitten the venomous snake and killed it.

The boy had blood in his mouth and on his hands, and acted as if the snake was one of his toys, refusing to release the animal, Ferreira said, adding that she needed help from her husband to force the child to open his mouth.

The snake has been identified as a jararaca, an Amazonian viper that is one of the most venomous snakes in the Americas.

[Just a thought not a sermon]

Hercules! Hercules!

[Drake]

One little badass snake-eater.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

That toddler is a badass.

[Agammamon]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJfEQQ_Tl_o

Can't find the specific scene, but its from this movie. Kurt Russel teaches, by example, a little kid to kill a dangerous snake.

[Matrix]

Chuck Norris' bastard son.

[Atanarjuat]

semi-related

[Matrix]

Chuck Norris' bastard son.

[Mazakon]

See, this is why we need to keep our children safe at all times! If we don't keep them inside, they will begin to learn from the animals!

[Jerryskids]

I don't know much about Brazil, so how did I immediately know that Mostardas is in farm country, that these monkey-fighting snakes were on the Monday-to-Friday plains?

[Swiss Servator]

Is he Australian?

[gaijin]

Mah baybee et the dingo!

[ant1sthenes]

It's a kid bites snake story.

[Atanarjuat]

Bernie Sanders' latest racial blind spot: Hillary's right on gun control ? urban vs. rural really means black vs. white

Trigger warnings: Salon, Amanda Marcotte, horrible abuse of the English language

I just find it funny that Hillary is running to the left of Sanders on gun control. Her post-primary chances are crumbling as we speak.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

The Democrat establishment seems to be all in on this strategy. That Bloomberg money doesn't seem to buy many elections, but is sure looks good to them!

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

I really can't understand how Debbie Was-A-Man Schulz still has her job (well, I suspect it's for protecting Hillary). The Dems have been utterly destroyed at every level of government except the presidency, but they keep doubling down on SJW policies that voters are rejecting again and again.

[Bo Cara Esq.]

The Executive is where the most crony dollars are to be had. They won't change until their strategy deprives them of that.

[OneOut]

That and the Republican opponents they've had to defeat.

Dole
McCain
Romney

I would think that the economy would be in much better shape if Romney had won though and forgein policy could hardly be worse than it is now.

[MetalBard]

They're just crossing their fingers and hoping that the GOP manages to out stupid them, which is sadly always a possibility.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

It's really their last hope at this point, but the GOP is keeping it alive.

[Restoras]

The Obi-Wan Kenobi Strategy?

[Rhywun]

urban vs. rural really means black vs. white

Someone prog-splain to me what the hell white people who live in cities are supposed to think?

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

White people who live in cities are bad because gentrification; if they leave, that's white flight, which is also bad.

They are only supposed to think of the shame of being white.

[Rhywun]

Where I grew up there was no such thing as "gentrification" - poor white folks like my family who didn't flee were considered pitiable and/or strange.

[Calidissident]

Apparently Malcolm X and the Black Panthers were just Uncle Toms?

[sarcasmic]

Leggy Maggie Gyllenhaal is unrecognisable in a curly blonde wig and tiny bra as she films scenes for prostitute role in The Deuce

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....d-Man.html
Didn't John once mention her as his ideal woman? Blech.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

She looks horrible here.

She gave me a boner in the "The Secretary".

TIWTANFL

[Drake]

I was thinking of that movie too.

Now she looks like Phyllis Diller.

[Michael]

It's the hairstyle. It's an awful choice to match with her facial features.

[lap83]

I like that movie, but it does have a still-attractive James spader

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

I had a total man-crush on Spader.

Now I see him in Blacklist...."dude, now you look like ME!"

But he's still James-FUCKING-Spader, so I'm OK. We get old, eventually.

Well, except for Jimi, Jim, John, Cass, etc.

[lap83]

There's just something about his demeanor. He will always be cool even though he's not as pretty anymore.

[Crusty Juggler]

Hair loss is sexy, you monster.

[Citizen X]

It better be.

[MSimon]

I have to shave to get tat look. I'm past 70.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

I can listen to him talk all day. I just love his manner of speaking. And his crooked smile.

He was SUCH an asshole in "Pretty in Pink" - or "Sixteen Candles" - whatever. I immediately fell in love with him more than with Molly Ringwald.

[Elspeth Flashman]

I would, just saying.

[Crusty Juggler]

I thought she did her best work in Zodiac, and I really liked Nightcrawler as well.

[SugarFree]

The Secretary came out 13 years ago.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

#AARPLivesMatter!

[MJGreen - Docile Citizen]

She was pretty damn hot in last year's "The Honourable Woman." Dominating Jew with a British accent may just be my thing, though.

[Zeb]

I've always thought she was nice looking. Not so much in those pictures.

[Crusty Juggler]

I think she is pretty, or certainly can be. She was in Won't Back Down, the movie that made the school system, including teacher's unions, look bad. It's formulaic porn.

[Rhywun]

I always had a thing for her brother - esp. Donnie Darko era - until recently. All bulked up and sweaty is not an attractive look for most men.

[Crusty Juggler]

This is the tagline for the movie: "A look at life in New York City during the 1970s and '80s when porn and prostitution were rampant in Manhattan." David Simon is listed as a writer, along with another writer from The Wire.

I would be into it, but it is starring James Franco.

[Troy muy grande boner]

would bang

[Lord Humungus]

Should you have sex with robots? Experts weigh in

"There's a lot of people who have challenges with regards to social interactions. And this provides them an opportunity...to actually share...at least some sort of interaction with something that they can have some sort of relationship with," Hunter said.

But Richardson warned about such a liberal use of machines and robots interfering in people's relationships. The academic said that they could be used in a "specific therapeutic context," but said there were dangers of robots becoming substitutes for partners.

"If a robot was in a therapeutic context with somebody...then that might be helpful, but you've got to remember...people are saying you can have this as a substitute and in the future it might be a replacement, and that's when we get into very dangerous territory," Richardson said.

[Drake]

My Proctologist says I need to get the poison out.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

and that's when we get into very dangerous territory

Because the robo-children born out of human-robot relationships will be able to walk among us in society without detection? We all know they'll side with the robots when the Robot Wars start.

[Agammamon]

Maybe. Maybe there'd be a half-robot 'daywalker' who sides with us and fights vampiresandroids.

[Pope Jimbo]

It won't be sunlight, it will be rain.

All the normal robots will fear rain because it makes them rust out. The rainwalker droid will be able to go out in a downpour and still stay shiny.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

Nightmare scenario: Robots with umbrellas

[Agammamon]

"Its him!" "The Rainwalker'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJt2N7LSptg

[gaoxiaen]

Ranxerox approves.

[Brochettaward]

I AM NOT AN ANIMAL. I AM A HUMAN BEING.

[Atanarjuat]

Neoluddites.

If anything, it will improve human relationships, because you won't have to have as much meaningless sex. FWBs will be a less common. But if you're currently employed in the World's Oldest Profession, start Vo-Tech school now.

Personally I can't imagine any technological advancements that would make robot sex appealing, but I'm sure the ingenuity of the marketplace will surprise me.

[Zeb]

I think we are pretty far from sex robots that simulate the actual experience at all well. I don't think whores have a lot to worry about in the short term. Seems to me that the actual other person involved is pretty important.

I'm sure that there will be plenty of interesting new masturbatory accessories though.

[Rhywun]

I think a lot of people aren't comfortable with hiring a hooker and would gladly settle for a sex robot if it was "good enough".

[Zeb]

That's true, I'm sure. And a lot of people make do with their hands now. I just don't think it will become a substitute any time soon.

[Agammamon]

1. It will *destroy* human relationships - if its good enough to fulfill your emotional needs, and doesn't require you to fulfill *its*, then it will replace most 'intimate' relationships. relationships are *work* - at there core they are an economic transaction. Someone gives you something you want, in exchange for something they want. If you *don't* do that, then the relationship doesn't last long.

2. There's no hurry for pros to start looking for another job. Sex is the ultimate in unskilled labor. It would be nearly impossible - short of the automation revolution having automated away 99% of all work - to deploy a sexbot for as low a cost as a person.

Remember, McDonald's is not pushing automation of its stores because the robots do a *better job*, but because they are afraid of the $15 minimum wage - *that's* what will price humans out of the fast food labor market in the short term, driving automation. Not advances in automation making humans obsolete.

[Zeb]

I think that if robots get to the point where they can fill your emotional needs to the extent that they can replace a real relationship, they should probably be called "artificial people" rather than robots.
Perhaps things are simpler than I like to believe, but I think that most people want an intimate relationship with another human being and the only way to replicate that would be to make a robot so like another person that it would have to have all of the flaws and drawbacks of other people as well.

[gaoxiaen]

But... a perma-tight cunt!

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

start Vo-Tech school now

Robot repair and cleaning will become popular.

Growth market. Invest now.

[prolefeed]

Personally I can't imagine any technological advancements that would make robot sex appealing, but I'm sure the ingenuity of the marketplace will surprise me.

We already have a shitty version of robot sex. It's called broadband internet porn.

[straffinrun]

On one hand, having sex with a robot is better than nothing. In the other hand...

[Swiss Servator]

*narrows gaze*

[Old Man With Candy]

You missed the obvious Gripping Hand joke.

[Swiss Servator]

Don't encourage him!

[Jerryskids]

"If a robot was in a therapeutic context with somebody...then that might be helpful, but you've got to remember...people are saying you can have this as a substitute and in the future it might be a replacement, and that's when we get into very dangerous territory," Richardson said.

Hang around enough people who use phrases like "therapeutic context" and feel compelled to offer suggestions as to how the state should get involved in deciding where you should be allowed to stick your dick and sex that doesn't involve another human being starts looking pretty damn good.

[Zeb]

How about this? It's none of your fucking business. Does he know that he sounds just like people who oppose gay marriage, easy divorce, birth control?

[Citizen X]

No, why?

[Zeb]

Because he thinks that he has any business telling people what kinds of relationships they ought to have and how and whether they should reproduce. Just seems like the same sort of social engineering impulse.

Maybe he's just offering some friendly advice, but I kind of doubt it.

[MetalBard]

As long as robots continue to look like those creepy ass uncanny valley things the Japanese keeping building then I don't think we'll have to worry about people having sex with them.

[lafe.long]

lol. You seriously underestimate people.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

^^This, and my wife doesn't like getting dressed up like a toaster.

Uhmmm.... toasters

[Rhywun]

Yeah, it's all fun and games until they snap your neck.

[Jerryskids]

It's not the getting dressed up like a toaster that's the problem, it's the being forced to listen to the talking about how getting dressed up like a toaster objectifies women and a toaster is associated with making a sandwich and other "womenly" roles assigned by the patriarchy and the racial implications of a toaster turning white bread into dark bread and the idea that women operate like any other push-button appliance that does what you want when you want it and otherwise just sits there and the fact that you don't care that you left your breadcrumbs all over the bottom of her toaster tray and expect her to clean up the mess - and pretty soon sex with a real toaster is preferable to sex with a woman dressed as a toaster.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Way to ruin my boner.

[Mindyourbusiness]

Just be sure it's unplugged...

[MSimon]

I dunno. An open marriage with a robot? I see problems.

Of course if the robot can commit.

[Lord Humungus]

Ron Fournier: Kentucky's Trump
If the next president doesn't heal our politics, angry voters may reach further to the dangerous fringes.

The Democratic Governors Association blamed the defeat of its candidate, Jack Conway, on the public's thirst for an outsider and "the unexpected headwinds of Trumpmania."

Like most analogues, this one is flawed: Bevin benefited from a deep disapproval of President Obama in Kentucky and, of course, running for governor in 2015 is nothing like running for president in 2016. But the Kentucky race is merely the latest warning shot fired at the political status quo, a surge of populism playing out at the edges of both parties: The rise of the tea party in 2010; the ouster of House Majority Leader Eric Cantor in 2014; the progressive magnetism of Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders; and, of course, the surprising staying power of Trump. In June, I called the celebrity billionaire a "combed-over reflection of an Angry America."

I'm not smart enough to know whether the presidency will go to an outsider in 2016. But I've spent enough time talking to voters across the country to believe that the anti-establishment fever will not be broken until the political system is healed.

[Fist of Etiquette]

As long as your antivirus definitions are up to date, I say go for it.

[Fist of Etiquette]

And, yes, this was meant for this comment and not the robot sex one.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Maybe if the Democratic Governors Association wasn't involved in what had to be the most negative campaign I have ever witnessed.

I don't think I ever saw anything promoting Conway that didn't include pictures of Bevin eating a live baby, right after tearing out of the mother's womb.

Some of them were so over the top, they could have (should have?) been false-flag operations.

[Drake]

Not sure where to house all your Muslim immigrants? How about Buchenwald concentration camp ?

http://www.americanthinker.com.....izers.html

[MetalBard]

Sounds like a thinly veiled threat to the Muslims to stop acting like assholes.

[Lord Humungus]

You know who else... oh wait.

[Drake]

There may be a real convenience factor having them there already...

[MetalBard]

Well it's more green because they won't have to use the trains to get them there.

[Homple]

Well, other places are starting to fill up.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11......html?_r=0

[BigT]

Germany has been short a few Semites for a long time.

[Lord Humungus]

How Bryan Cranston's 'Trumbo' Whitewashes Stalinism

One of the weaknesses of Trumbo, the hagiographic new film starring Bryan Cranston as blacklisted communist screenwriter Dalton Trumbo, is that it never grapples with what it meant to belong to a political party funded by an unfriendly foreign power committing atrocities on an unimaginably horrifying scale. While we can agree that blacklisting was a dark period in our history, it's also worth looking at the people and policies Trumbo and his fellow American communists supported before we hold them up as heroes?and before we condemn those who named names as spineless, craven cowards.

The film's explication of Trumbo's own commitment to communism is literally childish. After his daughter asks whether or not he's a commie, Trumbo sagely launches into a spiel about how communism is just like sharing one's lunch with a hungry classmate at school. Taken solely as a piece of writing, the speech is cringe-inducing, pedantic. However, the deployment of such a metaphor on behalf of communism is amusingly and darkly ironic given what we know of the engineered starvations presided over by his party's leaders.

[Drake]

Like sharing your lunch with a hungry classmate at gunpoint while sending another to a Gulag.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Like having the school confiscate everyone's lunch and after the admin takes all the best stuff for themselves, combining what remains into a ground paste that gets served back to you.

[Agammamon]

. . . before we hold them up as heroes?and before we condemn those who named names as spineless, craven cowards.

Well, its like this. They *were* spineless, craven cowards. And so were the black-listers who didn't have the courage of their convictions. If the American system was so great, it could survive a bunch of useful idiots spouting propaganda.

[Krabappel]

Was blacklisting really any worse than what modern SJW's do to people whose views are "problematic"?

[sarcasmic]

'That's called William S**t-ting!' Star Trek actor wears Stormtrooper outfit and gets bleeped after accidentally swearing at CMAs

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....CMA-s.html

[Agammamon]

Aren't you a little . . . big, to be a stormtrooper.

[Elspeth Flashman]

That's what she said.

[Notorious UGCC]

"Over the past five years of Syria's civil war, the United States has admitted a grand total of 53 Syrian Christian refugees, a lone Yazidi, and fewer than ten Druze, Bah?'?s, and Zoroastrians combined....

"The religious terror that drove them from Syria blocks their registering [at UN camps]. The Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) is largely limited to collecting refugee applications and making resettlement referrals from its own camps and centers ? the burden of feeding creates strong incentives for this practice....

"Like Iraqi Christians who opt for church-run camps over better-serviced U.N. ones, Syrian minorities fear hostility from majority groups inside the latter. According to British media, a terrorist defector asserted that militants enter U.N. camps to assassinate and kidnap Christians. An American Christian aid group reported that the U.N. camps are "dangerous" places where ISIS, militias, and gangs traffic in women and threaten men who refuse to swear allegiance to the caliphate....

"...George Carey, former archbishop of Canterbury, called it right about the Christian refugees, and his words equally apply to Syria's other non-Muslim communities: They are being "left at the bottom of the heap.""

[Bo Cara Esq.]

Paul made some headway among social conservatives in the past when he spoke of the plight of Christians specifically in the Middle East, perhaps he could do so here.

[Derpetologist]

Spot the Not: eccentric mathematicians

1. He forbade his sons from becoming mathematicians out of fear that they would ruin his good name.

2. He was fond of writing "it is therefore obvious that..." whenever he lost a proof of a difficult theorem.

3. Once drove a rival to insanity by lighly tapping him the head with an umbrella thousands of times over a period of 5 years.

4. Was called "The Cyclops" after he went blind in one eye. He continued to publish with aid of scribes after he went completely blind.

5. He liked to read and drive at the same time and caused many car accidents. A fat man, his wife said he could count everything except calories.

6. When one of his students dropped out to study poetry instead, he said: "Good, he did not have enough imagination to become a mathematician".

[straffinrun]

My patriarchal instinct made me search for the "She", but I'll go with 5.

[Atanarjuat]

Yeah, that was Chris Christie.

[Swiss Servator]

3?

[Jerryskids]

I'm going with 3 just because I don't think a real mathematician would even notice being tapped on the head with an umbrella thousands of times over a period of 5 years.

[Citizen X]

+1 dandruff helmet

[Derpetologist]

3 is the Not. That is based on a short story by Fernando Sorrentino.

The rest in order are Gauss, Laplace, Euler, Neumann, and Hilbert. Erdos was a real oddball too.

[gaoxiaen]

5 Out of boot camp?

[sloopyinTEXAS]

Tubbo has a sad over Halloween costumes.*

http://www.salon.com/2015/10/3....._that_off/

*Her tears taste like delicious bacon grease. Try them!

[sloopyinTEXAS]

The comments are absolutely hilarious. If she wanted to get a bunch of sympathy, she's going to be upset.

[Crusty Juggler]

That is way too long for me to read, but just to refresh everyone's memory (you're welcome), the author wrote one of my favorite articles I choose to be fat., which has the sub-title "Doctors have bullied me about my weight for years, but obesity has given me the armor I needed to survive."

[Atanarjuat]

The writers at The Onion couldn't have come up with something better.

[lap83]

That is amazing. It almost makes me want to learn more

[MSimon]

Bogart? She should have gone as a hand rolled illegal cigarette.

[Krabappel]

Save those tears! I need them to season my cast iron.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

I wanted to saunter through the party in the Bride's iconic yellow-with-the-black-stripe jumpsuit, pointing my plastic katana at the boys who struck my fancy and?emboldened by portraying such a beautiful badass (if only for a night)?playfully taunt them with her most poetic threat: "Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you've lost. They belong to me now."

"Because I'm going to eat them" she didn't add.

[OneOut]

The woman is a regular contributor to Dame, has an article in Salon and has written a book.

And she wrote....but only because I've luckily reconnected with a friend who is a great sewer and pattern-maker

Now I don't have any friends who are great sewers. I don't even have a friend who is a great ceptic tank.

I do have a friend who is a great seamstress though.

[sarcasmic]

Watch a man's terrifying tug-of-war with a huge black spider after he lured it out of a trapdoor with a stick

The hair raising vision was captured somewhere in Sydney bushland
The man lures the trapdoor spider out its burrow with a long stick
But the arachnid grabs the stick and almost manages to steal it

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....pider.html
Terrifying? Hardly.

[Notorious UGCC]

I bet that spider has a lot of human and cow skeletons in its spider hole.

[sloopyinTEXAS]

And a hobbit or two!

[sarcasmic]

It's Australia, not New Zealand.

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

Same thing

*ducks*

[Apatheist ?_??]

Jermaine: I'm a person. Bret's a person. You're a person. That person over there is a person. And each person deserves to be treated like a person.
Sinjay: That's a great speech. Too bad New Zealanders are a bunch of cocky a-holes descended from criminals and retarded monkeys.
Jemaine: No you're thinking of Australians
Bret: Yea thats Australians

[sarcasmic]

The ultimate revenge! Scorned wife sends her cheating husband a box of horse FECES after discovering he was having an affair with a woman less than half his age

Freelance writer from New York Amanda Chatel, 35, discovered that her French husband, 48, had cheated on her with a 20-year-old woman
After she uncovered the truth, the young woman sent her a poem depicting her as 'the horrible woman who was crushing her husband's soul'
Amanda responded by ordering a box of horse excrement from feces delivery company S***express to be delivered to him

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/fem.....f-age.html

[Drake]

How will this man ever get over it? With some fresh young ass maybe?

[Notorious UGCC]

Pshaw, she should have worked with Australian Spider Express.

The spider would have dragged the young woman to its love nest.

(I know, it's probably a female spider)

[Just a thought not a sermon]

Story about a woman whose husband had an affair: sympathy is with the woman

Story about a woman whose husband had an affair and she reacted in a petty, over-the-top way: sympathy is with the man who had to put up with a wife like that for so long

[Lee G]

Maybe, he's a French cabaret musician,. Odds are he's a self-absorbed dick. Of course, she married him.

[Agammamon]

She married a Frenchie - how could she be *surprised* that he'll stick it in anything that doesn't run fast enough. I mean, the French are *known for 5 things. Not shaving, not bathing, cheese, surrendering, philander.

[Citizen X]

+cinq ? sept

[Derpetologist]

Derpy's Army Countdown: 2 weeks left

Motivational song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acJABWTm7ig
fun fact: it sounds the same forward and backward- a musical palindrome
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yoCvo6G3zgU

Motivational thought: The line must be drawn here! This far, no further! And I will make them pay for what they've done!

[Lord Humungus]

These Are the 20 Richest Cities in America
The tech boom has shifted the balance of economic power

Harvard University professor Edward Glaeser says the diverging fates of high-skilled and low-skilled regions has been one of the most significant trends in the U.S. economy as well as other developed economies over the last three decades.

There's an ''ongoing trend towards skilled places being far more compensated than non-skilled places," said Glaeser, whose research focuses on what causes cities to grow. "The poster-child of this in the data is the San Jose metropolitan area, which is off the charts in terms of income growth.''

Tech cities outside the Bay Area have also benefited from the industry's boom. Helped by not only Amazon Inc. but also newer Internet companies like Zulily Inc., Seattle's GMP per capita grew by a cumulative 7.9 percent since 2009, when the economic recovery began. (The cumulative growth since 2008 is a much more tempered 2.5 percent because of the dramatic drop in the financial crisis.) That helped the Washington city catapult to No. 4 from its No. 6 spot in 2008 through 2011. Biotech hotbed Boston also jumped two places since 2008, while Portland, Oregon (sometimes called Silicon Forest) climbed six spots.

[Kristen Bids No Trump]

Whoa whoa whoa. Skilled labor gets paid more than unskilled labor????? Since when????

[OneOut]

All that income needs to be redistributed.

[Restoras]

Happy 5th of November, everyone!

[Juvenile Bluster]

Is this the day everybody wears corporate-sponsored masks and forgets that Guy Fawkes was trying to initiate a theocracy in Britain?

[Restoras]

Sure!

[straffinrun]

Yeah, I hate dat fawkin guy.

[Zeb]

If they knew that about Guy Fawkes in the first place. The masks are popular because of the movie, of course.

The bonfires seem like fun, though.

[greasonable (was sthgrau)]

As opposed to the CofE, with an actual head of religion/state?

[Zeb]

Different, Catholic theocracy.

Point is, he wasn't some sort of anarchist freedom fighter.

[Restoras]

That's why I like the movie version.

[Kristen Bids No Trump]

Lol @ the idolators and worshippers
http://www.npr.org/sections/th.....ot-himself

[Lord Humungus]

Comedian Kathy Griffin Trashes Pro-Life Ben Carson: "I Wouldn't Let Him Give Me a Pap Smear"

PBS is the place for crude pap smear jokes, apparently. Liberal comic Kathy Griffin appeared on the Tavis Smiley show, Tuesday, to assail several of the Republican presidential candidates. As Smiley laughed, she mocked, "Dr. Ben Carson, I wouldn't let that guy give me a Pap smear."

In October, Griffin reversed her nasty joke: "I would love to give every single one of the Republicans running right now, including Carly [Fiorina] a Pap smear?.I will do it personally." On September 16, during a Republican debate, she predictably insisted, "These candidates all need a Pap smear right now!

that's a lot of pap smears

[Drake]

Does she typically go to a Neurologist for Paps?

[lap83]

Maybe she's admitting she regularly gets the two organs confused

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Think with your sex organ is supposed to be a guy thing. Kathy just trying to be equal.

[MSimon]

Smearing pap has got to be an ugly job.

[MetalBard]

In other news apparently Kathy Griffin is still around..

[Crusty Juggler]

If sniffing Anderson Cooper's balls on national television doesn't end a career, nothing will.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

Neither of those jokes really make sense. Does she even know what the words she's using mean? Or what a neurosurgeon is?

[Notorious UGCC]

I doubt she would ever be in need of the services of a brain surgeon.

[Rasilio]

Well if she was he'd have to be working hand in hand with a proctologist just to examine her

[Citizen X]

I always get Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick confused.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Whatever Kathy Griffin has done, she's not Andy Dick. Fucker killed Phil Hartman.

[tarran]

I think hiring John Lovitz to replace Hartman on News Radio had to be some sort of revenge.

I think Lovitz must have made it his life mission to torment Andy and make his life a living hell.

[Juvenile Bluster]

Which culminated in Lovitz smashing Andy Dick's head into a bar about a decade back, which cemented Lovitz as one of my favorite comedy actors of all time.

[Citizen X]

The big 40th anniversary SNL special was sort of a big ol' wank, but it was worth it when they ran the tribute to former cast members who had died and Lovitz's name was on the list, and then the camera cut to him in the audience looking shocked.

[Citizen X]

Sort of.

[Monty Crisco]

And in related news: Ben Carson relieved that he doesn't have to give a Pap smear to a post-op gender reassignment surgery victim.

[Mrs. Premise]

Maybe she should have let him do her facelift, or whatever the fuck she did to her face.

[Drake]

Mini Ice Age predicted as sun 'hibernates'.

http://www.express.co.uk/news/.....hibernates

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

I blame Global Warming

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

Butbutbut CLIMATE CHANGE!!!! ACT NOW OR DOOOOM!!!!! AAARRRRGH!!!

[commodious spittoon]

The big freeze could last a decade as sun goes to sleep

If there's one thing I love about science reporting, it's the spot-on accuracy of their metaphors.

[toolkien]

Somebody get Obama on the line, one executive order to the sun and all this blows over...

[gaoxiaen]

Stock up on the bacon.

[lafe.long]

Airbus A380: Video Shows Emirates Plane Flying Next to 2 People With Jetpacks Over Dubai

The video, created by Emirates and Jetman Dubai and uploaded on Wednesday, shows Yves Rossy and Vince Reffet using jetpacks to fly close to the Airbus A380.

[sarcasmic]

cool

[Drake]

Very

Are these the planes with the bars in them Jennifer Aniston is pushing?

[Jerryskids]

I keep seeing the "plane with a shower and a bar in it" ads and thinking - big deal, the planes I've flown on they had a waitress come around and take your drink order and bring it right to your seat. And do you really want to get on a plane where your fellow passengers are that desperately in need of a shower?

[Drake]

Well... it is flying to and from the Middle East...

[lafe.long]

C'mon guys... mf'ing JETPACKS!!!!

[Almanian's Rusty Woodchipper]

+ January, 1952 Popular Mechanics

[Timon 19]

Ah, the Khaleej Times. Hilarious paper, I must say. Brings back memories.

[Agammamon]

jeezypetes. And our government freaks out when someone flies a 2 pound drone within 1000 ft of a helicopter.

[Raven Nation]

I was just thinking, wait until the anti-terrorist freak out begins. I mean, terrorists with jetpacks could place bombs on planes in midair.

[Agammamon]

The plot of the next Mission Impossible movie.

And/or the next COD.

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

Think I just did something like this in Far Cry 4.

[Mazakon]

Anonymous to release 1,000 more names after debacle

The hacker group Anonymous on Thursday is poised to release the names of 1,000 people that it says are members of the Ku Klux Klan.

The data dump, if authentic, could help boost the image of Anonymous, a loosely affiliated anarchist collective that has come under fire for leaking inaccurate information and failing to control its "members."

[Citizen X]

My mayor was on the 'preview' list earlier this week, so Norfolk's got that going for it, which is nice.

[Notorious UGCC]

"The data dump, if authentic"

OK, I'm going to need some verification of the authenticity here.

[DJF]

The FBI is going to be pissed when all their undercover agents are exposed.

[Rasilio]

"Anonymous, a loosely affiliated anarchist collective that has come under fire for leaking inaccurate information and failing to control its "members.""

Not being in control of your "members" is kind of the hallmark of anarchist collectives

[ant1sthenes]

Also, Steve Smith.

[MSimon]

Stronger hands are required. You can strengthen them by squeezing rubber balls.

[Jordan]

Disgraced prosecutor Kathleen Kane shows us how to go out in a blaze of glory:

HARRISBURG, Pa. ? Facing criminal charges, relieved of her law license and threatened with removal by the Legislature, Pennsylvania's attorney general seems to have decided that if she has to go, she's going to take others down with her.

Since all three branches of state government began moving against her over the past year, Kathleen Kane has released hundreds of sexually explicit or otherwise crude emails that had been sent or received by current or former public officials on their government accounts.

The tangled scandal has led to the downfall of a state environmental secretary and shamed a state police commissioner, a Pennsylvania Supreme Court justice and several former top officials in the attorney general's office. Another high-court justice resigned after newspapers disclosed his involvement.
Kane has threatened to release more, and the state Capitol is ablaze with speculation about whose emails may be next in the drip-drip-drip of disclosures.

[Crusty Juggler]

Why do people send anything remotely controversial over their government accounts?

[Citizen X]

Because the high level of psychopathy necessary to want to work in government isn't correlated with a high level of intelligence?

Hitler?

[commodious spittoon]

You know who else...

wait, you did it backward.

[Citizen X]

I like to play with the audience's expectations, you know?

[Rasilio]

don't forget the air of invincibility being a "top man" gives you

[Atanarjuat]

And the arrogant stupidity of those who seek earthly rewards but know they won't have what it takes to achieve them in the free market.

[Lee G]

I love it when they eat themselves.

[commodious spittoon]

Go on...

[OneOut]

And now we can see why Hilliary isn't in any danger of going to jail and why she can rest assured Obama isn't going to let the FBI even file charges on her.

[AlmightyJB]

Seems like another good reason for body cameras

http://hotair.com/archives/201.....y-implode/

[Juvenile Bluster]

Maybe, maybe not. Given that this is a Jazz Shaw article, I'd need a bit more proof that the police are in the right here.

[Citizen X]

Jazz Shaw speeds constantly in hopes of getting pulled over, that he may offer fellatio to the officer.

[Crusty Juggler]

The inside of his stupid fedora is filled with the donut-flavored semen from police agencies all across this beautiful country.

[Citizen X]

Which is a tribute to his skills, since cops are rarely able to maintain an erection to completion.

And, just in case, he has a box of puppies in the back seat so they can shoot one if that's what it takes to get them to climax.

[Crusty Juggler]

Agreed. Interesting that they released the video as soon as it was in their favor.

However, the last paragraph really grinds my gears:

Honestly, who wants to bother going into law enforcement any more? As we've discussed here before, enrollment numbers in academies are down, particularly in the larger cities. It's bad enough that police wind up in violent encounters with suspects at the risk of their own lives and are then carted off to the inquisition over it. But if you can't even talk to someone without having accusations lobbed against you in the press and protests outside your door it hardly seems worth the meager salary most cops make to put on the badge.

[Juvenile Bluster]

It's Jazz Shaw. If you took Tulpa, combined him with Dunphy, and made the combined beast even more pro-cop, you'd get Jazz Shaw.

[Zeb]

Maybe we are just running out of the right kind of assholes who want to be cops.

[Agammamon]

If nothing else, why did they ask for identification and/or detain her while verifying that ID?

[Lord Humungus]

Vape Regulation is coming and it might kill the industry

The vaping industry in America is on a precipice, staring down a fast-approaching but uncertain future. In October, the Food and Drug Administration filed its final regulations to the White House Office of Management and Budget, the eighth step in a nine-step process to regulate electronic cigarettes that started more than four years ago.

These final regulations aren't public yet, but vapers are worried that if the rules are anything like the proposed regulations the FDA put out last year, the industry could be in trouble. The major concern circles around one thing: a grandfathering date that determines which products can stay on the market, and which would face regulatory barriers so high, some vaping advocates say it would kill the business.

"This date could destroy the industry," said Gregory Conley, the president of the American Vaping Association, a nonprofit advocacy group.

[See Double You]

FDA, please DIAF.

[lafe.long]

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups: Canadian Chain Restaurant Introduces Burger Stuffed With Candy

The Works, a chain based in Ontario, released "The Reese PBC Burger," which features a ground beef patty, onion straws, bacon and the peanut butter and chocolate candy.

oh, Canada

[commodious spittoon]

What is an "onion straw"?

[Agammamon]

That just sounds fucking horrible.

[Derpetologist]

The Wizard of GOP

Here's the current cast I have in mind:

Hillary as the Wicked Witch
Sanders as the flying monkeys
Fiorina as Dorothy
Rand as Toto
Cruz as Tin Man
Jeb as Scarecrow
Trump as the Cowardly Lion
Grover Noquist as the Wizard

[lap83]

Christie as Glinda

[Citizen X]

I would have said Christie as the house, but sure.

[The Shrubber's Woodchipper]

Nah. Christie as the house that falls on the Good Witch of the East.

[lap83]

Christie in a glinda costume makes me laugh though

[Bobarian (Would Chip Her)]

And the 3/4" cables they'd use to lower him into scene?

[lafe.long]

Egyptian Pyramids: Ben Carson Theorizes Grain Stored in Pyramids in 1998 Commencement Speech

"My own personal theory is that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain," Carson said in a 1998 commencement speech at Andrews University, unearthed by BuzzFeed. "Now all the archaeologists think that they were made for the pharaohs' graves. But, you know, it would have to be something awfully big ? when you stop and think about it, and I don't think it'd just disappear over the course of time ? to store that much grain."

[Drake]

And the drudging up of every detail of his life begins.

[commodious spittoon]

At least they'll provide all the contextual details like whether he was being humorous or speaking extemporaneously. Right?

[lafe.long]

Mike Rowe: Off The Wall

I just stumbled across a long letter posted on HuffPo, from a gentleman named Charles Clymer, in reference to my post last week about "hard work." Suffice it say, Charles and I don't see eye to eye on everything. Unlike most of my detractors though, Charles writes pretty well and remains refreshingly civil. Since I'm currently sequestered in a hotel room somewhere in Orlando, I thought perhaps I'd respond in kind...

[Lee G]

Charles: MHP was trying to make a point -- and a rather good one -- that the term "hard worker" is a way of othering people of color but especially women of color and especially women of color whose way of life may not reflect the "wholesome" dinner table of a Norman Rockwell painting. It is a vicious -- and violent -- judgement based on racist views.

Mike: We disagree. Melissa's comments were in direct response to a guest who said Paul Ryan was hard worker. Her admonishment to be "very careful" about the use of "hard worker" was a lecture out of left field, a bizarre accusation fraught with political correctness. Mostly though, it was just one more assault on the idea that success still requires hard work, no matter who you are.

Charles: I don't think you mean any harm when you wade into these issues, but I am concerned, at times, with your 1) lack of awareness about your white privilege, male privilege, etc. and 2) your need to "stay above the fray" by offering something resembling wisdom that supposedly stays away from all things controversial, yet obviously supports viewpoints that reflect the minds of the average white American on controversial issues.

Mike: You're correct. I mean no harm to anyone. And while I appreciate your concern, I can assure you I'm well aware of my many blessings. I'm just not all that impressed by my race or my gender. Or anyone's, for that matter.

[Lee G]

Charles appears to be the "we should graciously educate our opponents" variety of prog. Polite, but just as condescending as the rest.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

I like Mike Rowe. I saw him speak a couple years ago. He struck me as a smart and down to earth guy.

This whole "hard worker" episode is utterly nonsensical.

[Notorious UGCC]

Progs should just cut to the chase and issue a glossary of approved words and phrases that *won't* get you called a racist. Then they would reserve the right to describe all other words and phrases as racist.

[Notorious UGCC]

I think Orwell had some interesting ideas along these lines - restructure the language so that some politically-incorrect concepts cannot even be adequately expressed through the Newspeak vocabulary.

[Princess Trigger]

"If we just remove the word 'woodchipper' they'll all roll over for us and we will be stamping on all the faces."

[Rhywun]

With the end goal being that it is no longer even possible to form ungoodful thoughts.

[Lord Humungus]

If you haven't watched 'em, Mike Rowe's HSN early days are funny...

[Notorious UGCC]

"Charles appears to be the "we should graciously educate our opponents" variety of prog. Polite, but just as condescending as the rest."

They think that if only they explain themselves slowly, using short words, without using obscenity, they're making such a gracious concession to their opponents that anyone who doesn't immediately agree with them must be malicious.

Then they can say, "we *tried* to reason with these right-wingers, but it just didn't work!"

[Monty Crisco]

"It is a vicious -- and violent -- judgement based on racist views."

This man is LITERALLY calling speech "violent". As if speech alone can physically hurt people.

No wonder all the progs want to ban the first amendment.

Come get me, Bo, and tell me how the R's wanted to ban flag-burning in the 90's!!!

[Jerryskids]

I had to go back and read that twice - I initially agreed with the guy that MHP's comments were a vicious and violent judgement based on racist views. I couldn't figure out why Mike Rowe would be on the other side of that argument.

[lafe.long]

Department of Defense: John McCain and Jeff Flake Release Report About Military Spending on Paid Sports Tributes

"Fans assume when they see these tributes that it's being done because of patriotism," Sen. Jeff Flake said. "To find out that the taxpayers are paying for some of these, it just kind of cheapens the whole thing."

[Free Society]

"US lawmakers and federal watchdogs on Tuesday derided the Transportation Security Administration's ability, or lack thereof, to adequately detect weapons and other contraband during the passenger screening process at the nation's airports."

Oh great. Now they're going to add to the security theater by sticking 3 or 4 fingers in our collective butthole.

[Notorious UGCC]

Whatever happened to the *invisible* hand?

[MSimon]

My butthole is not a collective.

[Crusty Juggler]

I am going to drop this nerd bait right here: Let's Demilitarize Star Trek.

[Crusty Juggler]

he first episode of DS9 shows its hero Sisko grieving the death of his wife while he explains the concept of linear time to an alien entity with no concept of human consciousness. It was heady stuff in 1993 and the series only grew in complexity and sadness.

This is the legacy any new Trek T.V. show must live up to. One in which military actions are a last resort ? not a first response. Where the universe tests humanity and a sense of wonder pervades all. A world where substance overrides spectacle, not the other way around.

[tarran]

Uhmm. Where are they going to get their dramatic tension?

The Federation is post scarcity. They have technology that pretty much can't break. Take out the military stuff, and what plot do they have?!?

Maybe they could make it about teenage girls growing up in the federation and the drama involved with their high schools. Teenage girls make breakfast dramatic, or so I'm told.

[Bern-o-Matic 5000]

People posting mean things about them on the Twitter?

[tarran]

That's it!!!!! Naturally, the commies that run the Federation will have nationalized twitter!

They would have to have a quick reaction force to protect against hate speech!

[JPyrate]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfbsZRbwbJ4

Long Live the Terran Empire !!!!!!

[Mickey Rat]

It is also the series where the main character designed a Federation warship class as a response to what was shown in the premiere episode.

[prolefeed]

"US lawmakers and federal watchdogs on Tuesday derided the Transportation Security Administration's ability, or lack thereof, to adequately detect weapons and other contraband during the passenger screening process at the nation's airports."

So they're gonna act like a private business would when finding a policy doesn't work, and disband the TSA?

HAHAHAHAHA!!

Yeah, they'll "fix" it. Maybe throw more money at the problem, reward incompetence.

[Diane Reynolds (Paul.)]

The Denver police union has filed a lawsuit challenging the department's new policy requiring cops to wear body cameras.

If you have nothing to hide...

[tarran]

Here in MA the dashcam cameras went away when the cops started feeling the pain of having the video evidence rebut a police report.

I think the attitude toward these cameras really speaks to whether the cops in the police force in question see themselves as honest guys or liars with something to hide.

[The artist known Dunphy]

It's pretty obscene tat this tool Bernie is better policy wise on MJ legalization than Rand Paul who SUCKS on this bedrock libertarian issue

Btw, our dept FORBIDS us from using body cams

In roll call polls, 70% of patrol cops voted for them

Most even said we would pay for them ourselves

I would wear one in a heartbeat if I could

Greatest officer safety invention since the vest - which conservatively saves a couple of hundred cops a year

Bodycams put cops AND suspects on better behavior, protect against bad cop, false complaints, etc

[The artist known Dunphy]

As a matter of collective. Bargaining - of course many unions will consider bodycams a bargaining issue

[MarisolMoore]

Start working at home with Google! It's by-far the best job I've had. Last Wednesday I got a brand new BMW since getting a check for $6474 this - 4 weeks past. I began this 8-months ago and immediately was bringing home at least $77 per hour. I work through this link, go? to tech tab for work detail,,,,,,,

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