A.M. Links: Carson Gains on Trump in Polls, GOP Prepares for Wednesday Night Presidential Debate, Biden 2016?

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  • Credit: Todd Kranin

    Donald Trump still leads among GOP presidential candidates, but Ben Carson is now a close second in the polls.

  • Is Joe Biden going to run for president in 2016? Last week Biden had a secret meeting "with one of the most prominent and powerful fundraising stars in the Democratic firmament."
  • The suspect in yesterday's fatal shooting of a Mississippi college professor has killed himself after being cornered by police.

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  1. Russian President Vladimir Putin has vowed to continue providing military support to Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.

    And he’s going to send him Snowden, just for kicks.

    1. WHERE’S MY TRUMP GIF?

      1. In bankruptcy court, probably.

      2. I think an appropriate Trump gif is one with a close up on his mouth, where as you get closer, the only thing in his mouth, is another mouth. Here’s one that’s close:
        http://33.media.tumblr.com/15d…..o1_400.gif

        1. It’s just like my dreams

          1. Not bad.

      3. I’m not so certain that Trump would fit in a miniskirt.

        1. “I’m not so certain that Trump would fit in a miniskirt.”

          The very thought of that makes me reflexively want to support the miniskirt ban.

    2. I imagine there are some old lifer Russian soldiers going “oh, sit, not this again…” If they haven’t all been killed in the Georgia, Ukraine, Chechen conflicts, etc., that is.

      1. *shit*

        I cannot even swear properly today 🙁

        1. Any Afghan Vets still around? Good times watching the Red Army collapse.

    3. Hello.

      107 comments in 20 minutes. You guys don’t fuck around.

      “Hungary has closed its border to refugees.”

      It’s interesting to hear Hungary not only say they’re protecting their own country but Europe as well given the battles against Muslims in Europe in history including the Battle of Vienna:

      http://bit.ly/1KcH5qr

      1. Eastern Europe’s response to all this has taken me by surprise. It is very interesting how I have been shielded from the Eastern European views by a UK media that finds those views unsavoury. Farage Le Pen etc. are always presented as nutters. I’ve never seen the media mention that Eastern Europe is a long way down this road and it appears to be very popular there.

        1. I think Eastern Europe and Italy given their geography (ie close proximity to Asia and Africa) have always been more vigilant against perceived or real incursions from abroad whereas countries in the interior part of Europe shielded by said nations tend to view things differently and perhaps with less concern. That’s why Austria and Hungary view their respective roles in having protecting European history so proudly.

          It’s my impression of reading history.

          1. They bore the brunt of attacks from the Ottomans, the Golden Horde, Tartars, and other eastern / Muslim invaders for over a millennium.

            1. Precisely.

              In lieu of this historical fact, their stance is not surprising.

              1. Did you really mean “in lieu of”?

                1. Ugh. /slaps forehead.

                  1. I structured the sentence differently in my head.

    4. Why the hell isn’t Putin taking in a million Syrians?

      He could move them into Crimea and Ukraine.

      1. Why the hell isn’t Putin taking in a million Syrians?

        Heh, good one.

  2. 91) I was thumbing through Bill James’s Baseball Abstract when I came across on offhand remark of his in relation to the knuckleball. He mentioned that around from around 1960-65, it became the received opinion in baseball that the knuckleball is a specialty pitch and that regular pitchers can’t and shouldn’t learn it, while it had always previously been just one of several pitches in a pitchers’ arsenal. He points out a couple specific situations that he believes led to that opinion at the time, but there is no reason now to continue believing it except that everyone just “knows” it to be true. But this happens all the time, not just in baseball. The obvious example here is global warming, but there are lots of other examples too: fat/cholesterol/salt are bad for you, neighborhoods are full of kidnappers waiting to molest your children, taking illegal drugs will make you an addict. Others?

    1. The conceit that aging and death is inevitable. Why does the major thrust of medical research continue to focus on palliative care and cures for specific diseases rather than curing aging and death themselves?

    2. Human nature. We don’t have time to validate everything we hear so we end up accepting what a lot of people tell us at a face value. 95% of the time that isn’t a problem (imagine questioning every time a friend told you about the color of his car), but that trust in other people will occasionally lead us astray. Best thing that can be done is to accept that sometimes things you believe aren’t going to be true and try to look into the important beliefs in your life when you have time and energy.

      1. True. You can’t really get anywhere if you don’t accept a lot simply based on what people tell you and the accepted wisdom. Which is why it is particularly awful when science gets infected with politics.

        Best thing that can be done is to accept that sometimes things you believe aren’t going to be true and try to look into the important beliefs in your life when you have time and energy.

        I think that says it all quite well.

        1. “Which is why it is particularly awful when science gets infected with politics.”

          Or anything gets infected with religion.

    3. INDUCT TIM RAINES NOW!!

        1. Yes!

          He along with Henderson were the most dominating lead-off hitters of their generation.

          Raines has HOF numbers. There’s no reason he shouldn’t be in.

    4. OT but related to baseball: http://www.amazon.com/Great-Am…..0679749063

      1. Rufus, I am not sure if you are aware of this book, but it is the definitive history of the Expos.

        1. Yes. I own it.

          It’s pretty much my experience with Nos Amours.

          The Expos were truly loved. The Habs own Montreal but the Expos had their place.

    5. Received wisdom is mostly horseshit. Everyone knows that.

    6. Breaking long comments into paragraphs will make hair grow on the backs of your hands.

    7. “He points out a couple specific situations that he believes led to that opinion at the time, but there is no reason now to continue believing it except that everyone just “knows” it to be true.”

      The notion that the US is a free market capitalist society. The majority of industries in this country are full of cronyist, protectionist bullshit that turns market forces upside down. When this (naturally) causes problems, people lay the blame on free market capitalism.

  3. GOP prepares for Wednesday

    Just no Hump Day jokes!

    1. GOPers are the last ones I want to think about in relation to humping.

      1. Well, if any of ’em wins, we’re all fucked.

        1. I admire the symmetry.

        2. As opposed to who else winning?

          1. Deez Nuts

      2. You’d rather think of Hillary and Bernie going at it?

        Maybe instead of debates the parties should have orgies. Maybe I’ve read too much of SugarFree’s blog.

        1. Orgies with Ebola patients. Christy can open.

        2. I think exposure to Sugarfree, and other commenters on this site, has altered my perceptions of reality, and what’s socially acceptable. I probably do not have a cause of action against Reason for this though.

          1. It’s caused me problems on Facebook.

  4. The suspect in yesterday’s fatal shooting of a Mississippi college professor has killed himself after being corned by police.

    LOL

    1. “Hey Peter!”

    2. Do you have a beef with that remark?

      1. It’s kind of a hash.

    3. Now, Korned I would understand.

      1. Why did I larf so hard at that…?

    4. I had just topped off a glass of wine with a bit too much – lol’ed – and spilled it on my shirt. Thanx either way

      1. 8 Days, nary a drop o’ booze. Watch out for this summer cold going around, Tejicano.

      2. Why bother with a glass?

  5. Okay people, I can’t not share this. It all spawned out of a joke picking on Canukistan, and just grew from there:

    Stanley and the Sabertoothed Laser Moose

    I hope I’ve spread an iota of confusion and mayhaps a few smirks.

    1. Joke? I thought that was a portrait of Rufus?!

      1. Rufus is a Sabertoothed Laser Moose?!

        1. Racists.

          1. Well, if your cousin hadn’t attacked Stanley’s comrades, he wouldn’t have been forced to shoot.

            1. You sayin’ he should have just given the Moose a Muffin?

    2. Aw, he died before he got to fight STEVE SMITH or a drop bear *sob*

      1. Hey, how about STEVE SMITH vs DROP BEAR?!

    3. Unless I am mistaken, UnCivil, that is the same M??se that once bit my sister…

      No realli! She was karving her initials on the m??se with the sharpened end of an interspace t??thbrush given her by Svenge – her brother-in-law – an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian movies….

      Saberteethed Laser Meese can travel great distances, you know.

  6. Last week Biden had a secret meeting “with one of the most prominent and powerful fundraising stars in the Democratic firmament.”

    He’s smart (never thought I’d say that about Joe) to wait for Hillary and Bernie to peter themselves out.

    1. “to wait for Hillary and Bernie to peter themselves out”

      OK, it turns out it’s the dems that are the last ones I want to think about in relation to humping.

      1. Well, if any of ’em wins, we’re all fucked.

        1. I admire the symmetry.

        2. As opposed to who else winning?

          1. Freedom!

            [I can dream – it’s all I have left]

            1. *Almanian! sworn in and cameras go black. A quick gulping sound is heard. Cameras begin rolling again, but there is no “sign” of Almanian! A man in a black robe then shouts*

              “Cthulhu is president. Long live the president!”

              1. “Vote for Cthulhu, maybe he’ll eat you last!”

                1. Meh, I’m sure Cthulhu would prefer locally raised, organic, free range humans. I’m pretty sure I rank right up there with Spam.

    2. I kinda think he really has 0 interest in being president.

      1. I’ve been watching the 2010’s SNLs and I noticed uncle Joe is the only one they were slightly willing to mock, so yeah, it’s probably best for him and his family to stay out of the presidential race. Also I’d forgot Hermain Cain was a front runner for awhile.

        1. They cannot make fun of Biden’s family, though, because most of them have passed away.

          They can make fun of his propensity to fondle and nibble the ears of young women, though.

        2. He has 0 interest, but he’s still probably the best Dem candidate.

      2. Uh oh, I might have to vote for him. I consider that to be one of the best qualifications for being President.

  7. Last week Biden had a secret meeting “with one of the most prominent and powerful fundraising stars in the Democratic firmament.”

    Cool, just as long as we’re not dangerously elevating the meaning of politics through language.

  8. “The suspect in yesterday’s fatal shooting of a Mississippi college professor has killed himself after being corned by police.”

    Why do they always do this? Jail is not that bad. Especially not the jails they are going to go to. No way are they getting mixed in with general population. Plus it doesn’t seem like they want to die when they start. They try to flee the police. It’s only when they are caught with no way out that they shoot themselves.

    1. Better this, thus reducing the surplus population.

      /E. Scrooge

      1. Just wondering why. It happens often enough on the big stories to be a pattern. Makes me wonder if it has something to do with the defect that drives them to do this sort of thing in the first place.

        1. This is a subject I have never thought about, and do not wish to start now.

          Good DAY, sir!

          *spins on heel – walks off quickly*

        2. Personally I’d kill myself before being locked in a cage, even if the cage isn’t so bad.

          1. Agreed, id rather be dead

          2. I think that’s what it’s about. Suicide by cop, or put yourself in a position where you won’t let yourself back out.

        3. They are crazy?

      2. “Better this, thus reducing the surplus population.

        /E. Scrooge”

        And it keeps the Court calendars from becomming clogged.

    2. “Why do they always do this? ”

      In their beneficence they want to save the taxpayers the cost of their trial(s) and decades in prison.

    3. I’m going to say it’s because they are fucking nuts. Outside of hardened criminals, I don’t imagine most murderers are starting from a very mentally stable place. I’d also imagine that in many cases after the adrenaline and passion of the crime wears off a bit they realize how fucked they are.

      1. I wouldn’t consider them that fucked, though. Depending how you play it, prison isn’t that bad. Certainly it seems less bad than being dead, but then I’ve never understood the desire to commit suicide.

        1. Depends on what you think dead is like. If you think it is flipping on off switch, it doesn’t seem so bad.

          1. Ceasing to exist terrifies me, so that’s not really a comforting thought. I guess this is just a mentality difference.

        2. I don’t get suicide at all either. Life is all there is. But I have to accept that it is a real thing. I always think it is weird when people argue support for the death penalty because prison is so horrible. I’m pretty sure I’d rather live, no matter what.

          But the sort of people who go shoot up church groups and college professors probably aren’t terribly rational people who are particularly happy with themselves. Of course, I’m just speculating and have no idea what is in their minds.

          1. Impulsive urder and suicide are considered to be forms of psychotic behavior – kinda like two sides of the same coin. So when an individual has been pushed to murder he or she is often close to suicide as well.

          2. I have a tremendous respect for life because I think that is all there is, but sometimes nothing is better than something, if that something is a daily dose ofass raping and ass whomping.

            1. At the moment, I think I’d choose that over death. I suppose it is quite possible that I would change my mind if I found myself in that situation.

    4. My guess is that the human brain treats murdering the people close to you like suicide — it’s a final, irreversible step that destroys your world. Basically, people like that want to die or at least for everything to be over just like normal suicidal folk, but something about them, OCD or narcissism or pathological desire for revenge, means they don’t want to leave loose ends.

    5. “Why do they always do this?”

      Murder-suicide in Greenwood: Making sense of a senseless crime

      http://www.startribune.com/mur…..327551471/

  9. How, exactly and in great detail, does one get ‘corned by police?

    1. I’m gonna bet that three, one-pound bags filled with beans are not may be involved.

      1. *sigh*

        html fail, and it’s so early yet

        1. I’m expecting a Trumpocalypse today, so I’m sure we will be given many more reasons to fail. I only hope PIRATE TRUTHER shows up. He is my hero.

          1. SHIVVER ME TIMBERS SOFTENING STEEL GIRDERS ARRRR

            1. WTC7 BE FALLIN’ AT FREE-FALL SPEED, YARR.

              1. AVAST! NE’ER IN THE HISTORY OF GRAVITY HAS A BUILDING COLLAPSED QUICKLY!!!!!

          2. What did Agile say yesterday? Something about “I don’t respect people who swash-buckle without a pirate ship”

            I think that’s PIRATE TRUTHER.

            1. Beautiful. I’m quoting him the first chance I get.

          3. THERE’S FLUORIDE IN ME RUM ARRRRR

          4. Isn’t Trumpocalypse on Thursday?

    2. Where’s the beef?

      1. Correct! And Rich controls the board….go ahead and choose a category, Rich.

        1. I’ll go with “I’m with Ben” for $400, Alex.

      2. I ALREADY MADE THAT JOKE!

        Sort of…

        1. Timestamp tie, Sir.

          Perhaps Fist can determine who was first.

          1. Fist would break the tie by being first overall and shaming us both.

            1. Cutting the Gordian knot, so to speak.

                1. “The Fistian Time Warp.”

                  Again?

                  1. The comments section is highly recursive today.

                  2. Just a jump to the left

                  3. +1 sedation

          2. Rich|2015/09/15 09:05:05
            Swiss Servator|2015/09/15 09:05:49

        2. Don’t have a cow, man

    3. Bit like tar and feathering just with cream corn. 😀

    4. How, exactly and in great detail, does one get ‘corned by police?

      You ever play the game, ‘Cornhole’?

      Not the one with two boards and tossed bean bags.

      The one that is featured in Warty’s dungeon.

      The police play just like that, only without any friction reducers.

    5. WHERE’S THE BEEF? BOOM NAILED IT

      1. You forgot to reset your timestamp.

        1. I don’t need to. It’s understood.

  10. 90) An article in the Washington Post today explains that California for the past four years has been in its most severe drought in 500 years. And of course, the state is “facing a mega-drought that could last up to 30 years if greenhouse gas emissions are not dramatically curtailed by 2050.” But, if global warming climate change is the culprit today, what explains the drought 500 years ago? Apparently, a study at Columbia University finds “California’s current drought is part of a natural pattern, but human-caused climate change has made it significantly worse.” We don’t actually know that though. We’re relying on tree rings to estimate the moisture from centuries ago?which is a valid method. But that method doesn’t tell us the temperature. All it tells us is the Southwest goes through very dry cycles from time to time. And now we’re in another one. Far from being evidence for global warming climate change, this should reassure us that what we’re seeing is no different from what the Earth has gone through tens of thousands of times before, and will do so again.

    1. still a cool story, bro

      1. I know, deja vu, right? Probably just a glitch in the matrix.

    2. They’re just making shit up when it comes to the effect of global warming on long term climate trends. When they say “facing a mega-drought that could last up to 30 years if greenhouse gas emissions are not dramatically curtailed by 2050.”, what they leave out is that it could last up to 30 years if greenhouse gas emissions are dramatically curtailed by 2050 for all anyone knows. The 2050 date is also really odd to mention there since it is more than 30 years away.

      Seems most likely that the western US has just been in an unusually wet period for the past 100 years or so.

    3. None of that makes any sense whatsoever.

      Talking to these people is no different than talking to a religious fanatic.

    4. Why wouldn’t a warmer world produce more el nino’s for CA – that possibility seems more likely than the opposite.

      Also, what was happening Climate wise 500 years ago? Something called the little ice age.

      1. I don’t think that people know enough about the actual mechanism behind El Nino to really say. Who knows how warmer atmosphere would affect ocean currents and whatever else is behind El Nino?

    5. Human-caused gross water mismanagement ain’t helped California, either.

  11. Donald Trump still leads among GOP presidential candidates, but Ben Carson is now a close second in the polls.

    Just wait until Friday morning when something equally as meaningless is revealed from the polls!

    1. Why Friday? Is that when we finally ask the millenials what they think about it all?

    2. I vote for completely ignoring polls for at least 4 more months.

    3. How do the results of the republicrat primary have anything to do with reason, liberty, or anything other than libertarians getting fucked in the ass by team read
      *same as above for team blue*

  12. What dark times we live in when wandering TEAM BLUE-ers have to pin their hopes on Ben Carson so that Donald Trump will not say “Ni!” to old women.

  13. Hungary has closed its border to refugees.

    Hungary is going to be Trump’s running mate.

    1. And they’re going to make Serbia pay for that fence!

    2. So the hungry are not welcome in Hungary?

  14. Expect a showdown between Donald Trump and Carly Fiorina at tomorrow night’s Republican presidential debate.

    Should be quite a

    *** dons sunglasses ***

    face-off.

    1. +1 visage

    2. I want their faces off.

        1. Give every candidate one of those evil rubik’s cubes; tell them if they solve it, they get to be CoC.

          Last, slowest or least evil fuck standing wins?

          Better than the Electoral college.

  15. Expect a showdown between Donald Trump and Carly Fiorina at tomorrow night’s Republican presidential debate.

    I will watch if a shaggy Jeff Lynne is involved.

    1. Your link, it broke my computer.

      1. OMG! Sorry, Lee G, I posted the link to the ELO song “showdown” with glee, but it ended disappointingly.

        1. ELO? Jeff Lynne? What are you, like 130 years old?

          1. I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT “ARMCHAIR THEATER” WAS A FINE BIT OF WORK!!!!

          2. Don’t bring me down!

    2. An Error Was Encountered
      The URI you submitted has disallowed characters.

      Must be typo Tuesday

      1. Better than a UTI.

    1. +1

        1. NO BINARY BIDDING!

          All additional bids must be made in decimal.

          1. It was in base 10. Exponential.

          2. 100 quatloos on the silent one!

          3. +6.02E23

  16. Expect a showdown between Donald Trump and Carly Fiorina at tomorrow night’s Republican presidential debate.

    The other 35 candidates have the best seats in the house.

    1. The biggest danger to Trump in being the front runner is that he’ll inevitably hang himself with all of that surplus rope.

  17. Bo Bait

    LEADING GAMERGATE CRITIC SARAH NYBERG CLAIMED TO BE A PEDOPHILE, APOLOGISED FOR WHITE NATIONALISM

    Sarah Nyberg, a transsexual formerly living as Nicholas Nyberg, sometimes known as Sarah Butts, is a well-known critic of the GamerGate movement who was recently quoted on the topic by The Washington Post. She enjoys the support of prominent progressive commentators including Salon columnist Arthur Chu, former NFL punter Chris Kluwe and academic Katherine Cross.

    But a recent leak from an online chat room owned by Nyberg reveals Nyberg’s disturbing past. In 2005, Nyberg described herself as a pedophile, revealed how she was obsessed with her young cousin, who was 8 years old at the time and whom we will refer to as “Alice,” defended white nationalism, and orchestrated a cyberattack against a rival’s website. Public records reveal that she currently owes at least $100,000 in back taxes and is classed as a “delinquent” by the Wisconsin Department of Revenue.

    1. and she is known to double-dip a chip.

      1. Say it ain’t so!

      2. One time she was driving and she swerved to hit a squirrel.

        1. We are talking about bad things she’s done. Not things that should get her nominated for a public service award.

          1. She leaves her Christmas lights up until June!

      3. She always leaves the seat up

    2. Not even slightly surprised. I know one of the other prominent critics was a former Neo-Nazi (he saw the ‘light’ and became a progressive).

      I’m not really sure why the upper echelons have been attracting such nasty people, but really, these aren’t people you want to be friends with or trust with anything.

    3. Holy shit, I just read some of those logs. I’m actually super proud of the reporter for contacting the cousin’s parents and showing them the log. Sarah has a folder full of pictures of their daughter that she’s been sharing with other self-admitted pedophiles. That’s the kind of thing you need to let parents know as soon as freaking possible.

      Also, not super clear on the law, but isn’t this enough evidence to get a warrant to seize her computers and check for child pornography?

      1. I’m not sure. I didn’t see any references to powered yard equipment…

    4. GAH next time TW: imagine a shirtless young Andy Kaufmann, and then imagine it pedo’ing.

  18. Read an interesting article (paywalled, alas) on North Korean millennials who are using drugs, gambling, and watching forbidden DVDs, accessible now with the limited move to allow street markets and private trading:

    She says the black market generation has three defining characteristics: it has no devotion to the Kim dynasty; it has had wide exposure to outside media and information; and it is individualistic and capitalistic.

    “We grew up with markets. We experienced selling and buying,” she said. “Once you start trading for yourself, you start thinking for yourself.”

    1. Ribertarian moment?

        1. Swiss, they are Korean, that is how their eyes look naturally. They ain’t narrowing their gaze.

          1. *looks for kimchi pot to hurl at His Holiness*

            1. I’m not worried. You’ll never find them because they are all buried.

            2. Is that some new North Korean strain? Pot’s legal there.

        1. My eye doctor saw what you did there, WTF.

          For you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsokBNOe_p8

    2. Modern technology is going to make it increasingly difficult for authoritarian regimes like the Kims to brainwash their people. This is a good sign for the North Koreans.

      1. Sure, but what about the all brainwashed Americans that just vote for me free stuff?

        1. Can we swap them for free market young Norks?

          1. I think that’s a fair deal. American progtards really want a Dear Leader to watch over them, tell them how to think and protect them from all fear and discomfort. They’d love North Korea.

            1. My progtard acquaintances tell me that North Korea is nothing like a progressive society. It’s almost as though they refused to look at their idol’s clay feet.

            2. And the Norks celebrate Earth Day 24/7 365 days a year!

              1. Nothing like a wood-gas generator-powered truck to help the environment.

          2. Seconded!

        2. Yaarrr, talk like a pie-rate day isn’t fer another few days, swabbie.

          1. ARGGGGGGGGH! Blimey ya barnacled beast! Raise the mainsail and head fer Jamaica! Rum for the men when we get there! Double quick time, lads, and get the devil behind ye…ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

    3. “Once you start trading for yourself, you start thinking for yourself.”

      This is probably the most profound thing I’ll come across today. North Koreans are treated like children and lead a childlike existence. It’s no surprise that when they start making their own lives, pursuing their own livelihoods, they wake up. This is, and should be, immensely frightening to the Kim dynasty.

      1. I hope the Kims end up like the Ceausescus.

        1. That’s too forgiving.

          Medieval torture methods seem appropriate. And starvation of course.

          1. Oh very well then Lee, send the Kims to work in agrotechnical centers for the rest of their lives.

            1. Nah, send ’em to Scientology’s Sea Org

              1. Nice, as the term of service in unimaginably more lengthy than a single life: “When a Scientologist joins the Sea Org, he signs a contract agreeing to serve for 1 billion years (no typo – 1,000,000,000 years). Because Scientologists believe in re-incarnation, the Sea Org member is expected to return and serve again in his or her next life.”

      2. This is, and should be, immensely frightening to the Kim dynasty.

        Enh they just have to look to China to see how a corrupt leadership can still maintain total control even while introducing limited freedoms.

        I expect Kim will overreact to this with a firing squad or two and life such as it is will go on as usual.

      3. Probably immensely frightening to American proggies, too.

    4. Really shows that markets are just human nature. I hate it when people talk about market economies as if they are just another political system or ideology like socialism or fascism. As if there is a choice to be made. Markets are just how human beings interact. Such a deep part of our nature that they thrive even under the most oppressive, anti-market regime there is.

      1. Agreed. That’s why I’ve always hated hyphenated anarchisms* – they all assume human nature will magically change and we’ll all be happy with syndicalism, primitivism, or what have you.

        * with the exception of anarchocapitalism, which still allows for people to opt out of markets and attempt to pursue their utopian dreams together

        1. I’ve never been able to understand just what socialist anarchists (or whatever they call themselves) are after. Seems pretty contradictory to be against coercive rule, but still think you can prescribe how society will be set up.
          Of course, although I am philosophically and anarchist, I don’t think that anarchocapitalism is something that is really at all likely to happen either.

        2. which still allows for people to opt out of markets and attempt to pursue their utopian dreams together

          before they start eating one another.

          1. John Lydon said of Occupy Wall Street “It always ends with a hippy playing a flute”. Guess that’s actually the penultimate phase

            1. That last Hippy with the flute (made from the thigh-bone of the penultimate hippy) is well fed.

  19. Russian President Vladimir Putin has vowed to continue providing military support to Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.

    Two guns and one barrel of a chest.

  20. terrible links this morning. I’m sure the commentariat will make up for it.

    1. Come on – Trump, Biden AND Putin! I tell, it’s GOLD, Jerry!

      1. So, Trump, Biden, and Putin walk into a bar; and the bartender says “What *is* this? A joke?!”

        1. Trump yells “you’re fired, you loser!” at the barkeeper, Biden takes off his shoes and tries to balance them on top of his head, and Putin runs over and punches a Bear head mounted on the wall and tries to pick up several women.

          1. Putin is having an off day, though, and only manages to bang three of the women.

          2. That is my dream world, right there

          3. You got a travel buddy, mini series there.

      2. No article about that woman in Kentucky?!?

        AARRGGH!!!! I NEED UP TO THE SECOND UPDATES ABOUT EVERYTHING SHE DOES!!!!!

    2. Be careful what you wish for.

    3. Links? Those are just for decoration.

      1. If you click on the links, you’re not doing this right.

        You think Fist reads any of the links? He doesn’t even read what he submits.

        1. If you’re not first you’re last

          1. If you’re not first fist you’re last

  21. Michigan resident tests positive for bubonic plague

    A Michigan resident is recovering from the state’s first ever confirmed case of bubonic plague, state health officials said on Monday.

    The adult resident of Marquette County in the state’s Upper Peninsula recently returned from a Colorado area with reported plague activity and there is no cause for concern about human-to-human contact, the state health department said.

    It was the 14th human plague case reported nationally in 2015, more than four times the average of three cases annually of the rare and potentially life-threatening flea-borne illness, state health officials said.

    An elderly Utah resident died from plague in August and two people have succumbed to the disease this year in Colorado.

    The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says the plague was introduced to the United States in 1900 by rat-infested steamships that had sailed from affected areas, mostly in Asia.

    Early symptoms of plague include high fever, chills, nausea, weakness and swollen lymph nodes in the neck, armpit or groin.

    1. Look like someone got caught

      [dons sunglasses]

      trying to flea…

    2. My advice is to avoid cliches like the plague.

      1. “Wow – you look like the Black Death today.” – the plague dude’s friend
        “Yeah, I feel like Black Death warmed over.” – plague dude

        1. I was on a large consulting gig where it seemed like there was some sort of card that had to be signed every day for some person I had never met.

          One day it was a get well card for a person I didn’t know. I asked what was wrong with them and the card person said they had Lymes disease. I signed it with “Counting the ticks on the clock until you return”

          I was never asked to sign a card again on that project.

          1. Ha!

    3. I think “reported plague activity” is scary and probably “cause for concern.”

    4. I wonder why we never hear much about prairie dogs in these stories.

      Bubonic plague got into the prairie dog population decades ago. That is where it is coming from.

      1. Yes. Here in Colorado plague pops up in the prairie dog population yearly, it seems.

      2. It is in prairie dog populations but it’s also in other rodents and other mammals. It’s widespread throughout the western U.S. Rock squirrels are the common source of infection in the SW and the California squirrel in the Pacific. And when I say that, those are really the host host animals. Fleas do most of the transmission of Y. pestis to humans.

  22. Derpy’s Army Countdown: 9 weeks

    motivational thought: he who dares, wins
    motivational song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKYALsp-sIg

    I discovered that walking backwards a few miles a week helps me run faster. There is evidence that walking backwards has other benefits too.

    1. +1 Ministry of Silly Walks

    2. It won’t move the odometer back, though.

      1. Oh wouldn’t that be fun? Imagine millions of old people walking around backwards to become young again.

        Wow, it took me one sentence to improve upon the premise of the movie Cocoon.

        1. In Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, the protagonists tried to erase the mileage on a car they stole by driving it in reverse on a treadmill device.

    3. It’s supposed to help your memory? But I forgot how.

      1. You may want to consider walking back that statement.

        1. A round of applause for that one.

    4. Box jumps really help speed up your runs. Work your way up to a 24 inch high box/platform then do 50 of those every other day. You will be surprised how much that can change your run.

      1. ^this

        Shuttle runs are also a real good speed increaser.

        On a football field, go 10 yds up, 5yds back for the legth of the field. Your thighs and lungs will burn.

      2. Well, I don’t know if doing a lot of box jumps helped but…I did reduce my one-mile run time from 7:30 to 6:45 after 8 months of CrossFit, which included an uncountable number of box jumps.

    5. Especially if you are in politics, right?

    6. Squats and glycolytic work and you’re set. An old article of mine on the subject:
      http://www.edwards.af.mil/news…..=123196506

    1. I’m not going to bother clicking the link. Having lived under his miserable reign in Maryland, I assume he’s against them. Also, he wants more taxes.

      1. The first of O’Malley’s 15 goals is to increase American families’ median net worth by $25K in 10 years.

        Sheesh, that’s already being done through currency devaluation.

        1. “Reach wage growth of 4 percent annually by 2018. Today in America, wages for most workers have been flat or falling for decades. In real terms, the average wage peaked in 1973. In addition, recent gains in wage growth have accrued to top earners: wages have risen almost 10 percent since 2000 for earners at the 90th percentile, while wages have fallen by nearly 4 percent for earners at the 10th percentile.”

          There is so much wrong with this paragraph.

          First of all, the reason wages have ‘fallen’ for the bottom tenth percentile is because the bottom tenth percentile is composed largely of recent Hispanic immigrants with no skills who have arrived since 1973. So the people who were in America in 1973 are not worse off today, it’s just that we’ve brought in lots of people from the third world who are really poor. That’s not evidence there’s something wrong with our economy, it’s evidence there’s something wrong with Mexico’s.

          Secondly, I just looked at a wage growth graph and since 2000, we’ve had like 5 months with wage growth over 4%. O’Malley wants to do this every year for half a decade, but doesn’t explain how.

          1. Mandate it. Just like health insurance. Wage-earners must secure 4% annual wage growth or be fined. Businesses with over fifty employees are required to offer 4% annual wage increases to all employees or be fined. Everyone has health insurance now, so it only makes sense.

            1. Don’t forget to peg inflation to 4.5%, which will guarantee wage growth to at least 4%.

    2. Yet another reason MOM will never be president.

      1. Your mom will never be president!

    3. My plan starts with expanding safeguards to all gun purchases, whether from a licensed dealer, online posting, or private sale. Under my plan, a background check would be required for each and every gun purchase. And every person seeking to purchase or transfer a gun would have to obtain a fingerprint-based license, including completing safety training and a waiting period. Without such protections, it will remain far too easy for criminals to legally buy guns.

      Progtards really do live in a fantasy land of their own mind, where criminals magically obey laws…just because.

      1. “I really like your plan to shoot up the church, but wait a minute here, bro. Are we going to have to acquire these guns without a license? That’s illegal!”

      2. You make it sound as though criminals ever illegally obtained guns, when we all know that that’s just an NRA ammosexual talking point.

    4. Why do people insist on having opinions on things they know nothing about?

      1. You’re basically saying people like O’Malley should have no opinions at all.

        1. I’m cool with that.

    1. Detectives obtained an arrest warrant Friday for Dukes, who goes by “Boo Boo” and hangs out in the Buckeye-Shaker neighborhood.

      Oh Cleveland, never change!

    2. Cleveland Man and Florida Man enter the Octagon….who emerges victorious?

      1. Wait, what if Triangle Man entered the Octagon with them?

        1. He’d just do the things a triangle can.

          1. +1 universe man

      2. The one that you feed.

  23. Last week Biden had a secret meeting

    It’s nice to see the Clinton tradition passed along.

  24. Humiliating FBI file reveals secret sex life of feared terrorist Anwar al-Awlaki

    So nice of the Government to kill him and spare him the social embarrassment

    1. I enjoyed that yarn.

      In a tale full of twists that might have gone a different way, this was an especially provocative turn. The FBI’s blanket surveillance was intended to find his ties to terror, and what it found did not add up to anything close to a criminal terrorism case. But because the bureau stumbled onto his visits to prostitutes, and because Awlaki found out about it, he abandoned his life in the United States, with dire ultimate consequences both for American security and for Awlaki himself.
      In other words, his main reason for leaving the United States was not Americans’ anti-Islamic prejudice, as many have assumed, but his own anti-Islamic behaviour.

      1. incompetence for the win.

  25. I heard a thoughtful comment on talk radio the other day: the guy said that Clinton made a deal with North Korea to give them aid if they canceled their nuclear program. The North Koreans got the aid, but never allowed inspections, and built an atomic bomb.

    I wonder if Obama & Kerry learned any lessons from that.

    1. They learned that people will buy any load of bullshit they want to sell them.

    2. Obviously they did because that’s exactly the same deal that was struck with Iran.

    3. I don’t know about Obama & Kerry, but the Iranians were fast learners.

    4. Yep. The big famine of ’94-98 caused all the bleeding hearts to lose their fucking minds. That shitheap could’ve toppled years ago but our tax dollars fed their military a little longer.

  26. Why sudden global warming means colder summers in Europe
    And with the largest El Nino event set to hit, it is believed rising temperatures like never before will scorch the planet.

    But on Monday, the Met said in a report that observations of climate patterns in the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans combined with record global temperatures past year and expectations 2015 and 2016 would be near record highs pointed to a changing trend.

    The latest findings will obliterate theories that global warming is beginning to slow down.

    […]
    However, this is far from certain, Scaife says, because there are so many competing influences, such as the positive PDO that might outweigh the effects of a negative Atlantic Multidecadal Oscillation.

    http://tvnewsroom.org/newsline…..pe-131674/

    *Sudden* global warming could strike at any moment! Lookout! This is indisputable truth, panic! PANIC NOW! … “however this is far from certain”, the author goes on to say.

    1. You mean weather patterns are complex and we aren’t sure how exactly they work? Who would have thunk.

      1. DENIER!!! FOLLOWER OF THE KOCHTOPUS!!!!!

    2. We know it’s getting warmer because it’s getting cooler! We know it’s getting dryer because it’s as dry now as it was a long time ago!

    3. And in other news, On Sunday our first snowfall of the year.

      http://www.newsminer.com/news/…..df72c.html

  27. Open-ended question: if it’s not a big deal to provide kosher meals to Jewish prisoners, despite the hassle and expense, why is it a big deal to allow Christian clerks to refuse to sign gay marriage licenses?

    Prisoners get more respect for their religious beliefs than govt employees these days.

    1. I’m sure they’ll be another Kim Davis thread to where that can be discussed.

    2. Prisoners have no freedom of choice. If they can’t eat the food served they don’t have an option to go elsewhere. By putting them in prison, we have taken responsibility for their upkeep, and part of upkeep is making sure they can eat. Note this is not me weight in on Kim Davis debate, just explaining the theory behind prisoner accommodations.

    3. Prisoners are not free to source their meals elsewhere. Government employees are free to try to find employment elsewhere.

    4. It prison was for violent offenders who had gotten a fair and honest trial, I would be all for telling them they can eat a bag of dicks for all I care. Unfortunately our prisons are packed with people who don’t deserve to be there, so they should be run as humanely as possible.

      1. Cooked or raw?

    5. Maybe we could get them rubber stamps so they don’t have to sign.

      1. We could get them from the same place judges get them for warrants.

    6. At Guantanamo, the cells have lines painted on the floor so the prisoners know which when to face when praying. They also give them korans, prayer rugs, halal meals, and time to meet with Muslim chaplains.

      If suspected terrorists deserve that much respect for their religion…

    7. Maybe because they are two fundamentally different legal relationships.

      Jewish prisoners aren’t paid to eat non-kosher meals. Whether their dietary preferences should be accommodated is an issue of policy and budget, not contract.

      Kim Davis is paid to issue marriage licences. If she wants to keep getting the $100,000 a year for the job, she should do the job. If she doesn’t like part of the job, she can do what the rest of us do, and get another job.

      1. If my job required me to do something I thought was wrong, I would probably just quit.

        I feel bad for anyone in a wedding-related job who opposes gay marriage. Their only choices are go against their beliefs or quit their job.

        1. That would include private-sector jobs?

          Because the anti-Davis crowd (except some eccentric libertarians) isn’t really big on the public/private distinction.

          1. the kim davis “debate” is stupid, it shouldn’t be a debate because the government shouldn’t be issuing licenses to form a social contract, its just a stupid holdover law from the racists who didnt want their white daughters marrying black men

            1. I’m not defending marriage licenses, because it doesn’t affect the question of which relationships the government should recognize as marriages. Under the old law, the government in a few states would recognize a common-law marriage between a man and a woman, but they wouldn’t recognize a “common-law marriage” between two men. And even today they wouldn’t recognize a “common-law marriage” among more than two people.

              But I don’t think marriage licenses came exclusively from the anti-interracial marriage movement. But you may have a point (see p. 11):

              “As states began to abolish common law marriage beginning in approximately 1875,
              the reasoning related to: (1) urbanization and industrialization which eliminated problems of access to civil authorities; (2) increased wealth in private hands, leading to concerns of protecting inheritances from fraudulent claims and transmission of wealth to legitimate heirs; (3) protecting the institution of marriage; (4) racism, eugenics, and class bias; and (5) administrative and judicial efficiency concerns.”

          2. That would include private-sector jobs?

            Its a nonzero risk. There has already been at least one business closed over this.

    8. Despite some of the previous comments claiming there is logic to it, there is none. Both situations arose separately from the successful lobbying of separate interest groups. It’s the tax code writ large

    9. Here’s an interesting thought:

      In 1993, when they were debating the Religious Freedom Restoration Act in Congress, there was an amendment to specify that the law wouldn’t protect prisoners. Congress rejected this amendment, because they thought even convicted criminals should have religious freedom.

      I’d note that public officials aren’t exempt from the various RFRA laws, either.

  28. Academic-derp on Derpbook #1:

    A friend of mine laments that we are living in political bizaro world. Because, if we lived in a sane political world, Jerry Brown would be a serious presidential candidate.

    1. They’re not satisfied that a straight up socialist is running and in the lead?!

      1. He’s not in the lead, he’s just leading in a few early states.

    2. Jerry Brown would be a serious presidential candidate

      HIGH SPEED RAIL IN EVERY GARAGE

  29. Academic-derp on Derpbook #2:

    Another friend of mine noted, in ominous tone, that the shooting yesterday occurred on a campus that allowed guns to be brought on to campus. So, Va Tech, school shootings, UAB, etc. all go down the prog memory hole.

    1. The suspect was a social sciences professor. And since they reported nothing of his beliefs, that means he’s a liberal.

    2. With your freaky views, however do you cope in academia?

      1. I don’t discuss politics with other academics – there’s just no common ground upon which to have a conversation. I do, however, push my students very hard to question the beliefs they come in with.

        But, I must admit, I have a lot of very aggressive arguments with fellow academics – by myself when I get home.

        1. But, I must admit, I have a lot of very aggressive arguments with fellow academics – by myself when I get home

          Ew.

          1. So there *are* things that will gross you out!

            1. That is a very small list, eh?

              1. Ass short as the the list of people the Germans laid off when they bought the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant

                1. How short again?

                  1. So short that even Joe of Lowell towers over it.

          2. Do those arguments ever come to blows, or angry passion?

  30. Meanwhile in Ohio…

    The Ohio [Fraternal Order of Police] joins a broad coalition of law enforcement officers and public safety advocates in calling for the defeat of Issue 3 in the Nov. 3 election.

    “This proposal would make the daily challenges of our jobs even harder,” said Jay McDonald, President of the Fraternal Order of Police of Ohio.

    “How can we keep children safe when adults can legally possess significant quantities of marijuana at home within easy reach, or when marijuana retail stores can operate within a stone’s throw of a newly built school or daycare? Issue 3 is a nightmare for the law enforcement community.”

    http://www.wkyc.com/story/news…../72255644/

    1. The great thing about that line of reasoning is that you can replace the word “marijuana” with absolutely any common household item, and it still works.

    2. “keep children safe”

      objection, assuming facts not in evidence

    3. What’s up with Amendment 3, anyways? On the one hand, legalization is good. On the other hand, I’ve heard the legalization metric that it sets up is absolute crap?

      1. It is absolute crap. The financial backers of the initiative are pushing a legalization scheme whereby only they will be allowed to commercially produce marijuana. It’s a step in the direction in a sense, but I’m a firm believer in slippery slopes and I’m not such a fan of voting a government sanctioned monopoly into existence.

        1. If Ohio allows initiatives, why not vote for this one and, if it wins, propose another initiative later to make dope less monopoly-y?

          1. That will eventually happen. I don’t believe the monopoly will exist forever. I think it will exist as long as long as it takes the monopolist enterprise to establish an economy of scale over their smaller competition.

            1. Competition like balconies or backyard gardens? You can’t compete against free.

              1. First, it’s not free. Secondly, the home growers are required to be licensed by the state and essentially give up all pretense of of fourth amendment rights to privacy in their home. Not to mention, who wants to register with the government, how well can that turn out?

    4. True story. The daycare my child matriculated out of two years ago has a pot shop close by. No child has gotten stoned to date.

  31. I don’t know who originally speculated about this, but on the radio this morning I heard that there are now rumblings that the cop who was supposedly murdered in a Chicago suburb actually committed suicide.

    And it took them 2 weeks to figure out this might be the case.

    1. imo, that cop had creepy eyes.

    2. Guess he took Wesley Snipes’ advice from “Passenger 57”

      “What would I do if I were you? If I were YOU, I’d KILL myself!”

      1. This is why I always bet on black.

        1. +57

    3. I live in the area. The assholes treated the town like a warzone over the death of one cop. We all know that they’d never do that over the murder of a peasant. Must be embarrassing for them that they now have to consider suicide, so it’s not really surprising that it took them weeks to fess up to the fact that they may have imprisoned peaceful people in their homes, shut down schools, and donned camo for nothing.

    4. SIV? That the cops are keeping dead silent about the case while complaining about coroner publicizing general information about the death sealed the deal for me.

      I don’t think it took the cops two weeks to figure it out. I think they suspected some time ago but chose to continue the homicide narrative for face saving reasons, partly his and partly their own.

  32. CNN: Uber economy like a “turn of the century sweatshop”

    I’m not c+p’ing from the article. The headline itself is dumb enough.

    1. Dammit. SF’d the link.

      http://money.cnn.com/2015/09/0…..=obnetwork

      1. You should have pull quoted because this person’s argument is hilarious:

        “After all, on-demand workers are a sizable piece of the U.S. workforce. A recent study found that 34% of U.S. workers are freelancers. Meanwhile, 40% of those surveyed said they worked for two or more companies — and half said they struggled to find enough work.
        According to NELP senior staff attorney Sarah Leberstein, who co-authored NELP’s study, the workforce looks “a lot more like turn of the century sweatshops.””

        Ah yes – those notorious freelance sweatshops from early 1900s America where the main concern of workers was that they couldn’t find enough work. Those were terrible.

        1. Sweatshop? That’s absolutely ludicrous. There is zero comparison and Leberstein just discounted any research she may have contributed.

      2. From comments:

        “NCNick 5 days ago
        The .00001% have won and the 99.99999% are too simple to understand that they lost the economic war. What can you expect when one side holds most of the weapons and the other side is too simple to use the only weapon (shear numbers of people) they have.

        In my humble opinion, the .00001% should win the Nobel Prize in Economic Sciences for the more than effective propaganda campaign that has some (mostly on the far Right) convinced that they have a chance to be “In the club”.

        Who needs Slavery when you have the Uber Economy. The poor are enslaving themselves.

        #eattherich”

        Ugly. Very.

        Fuck you CNN.

        1. That actually reads like a parody.

  33. Trigger Warning: Auto-play video embedded

    Emily Blunt says GOP debate makes her regret becoming US citizen

    Actress Emily Blunt recently joked that she questioned her decision to be come a United States citizen following the first Republican presidential debate.

    “I became an American citizen recently, and that night, we watched the Republican debate and I thought, ‘This was a terrible mistake. What have I done?'” she told The Hollywood Reporter at the Toronto International Film Festival in an interview published on Monday.

    Blunt also mentioned that she was impressed by Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA).

    Davis Guggenheim, director of the “He Named Me Malala” documentary, lamented the state of the Republican presidential primary, calling it the “Republican clown car.” He also predicted that Donald Trump will “crash and burn.”

    Oh Hollywood, will you ever not live up to stereotypes about yourself?

    1. Someone build a wall around that bitch. TRUMP! Where are you! Get on it!

    2. Becoming an American citizen *is* a mistake. Great! Now all your worldwide income becomes taxable! And you have to disclose foreign assets using onerous forms! And kiss any overseas bank accounts goodbye, since foreign banks cope with intrusive IRS tax collection attempts by simply refusing to do business with americans.

      1. FATCA is unbelievable. I tried to open a second acct at a Japanese Bank I’ve been with for 15 years and even that was impossible. I’m glad at least my existing accts weren’t cancelled.

      2. ^^

        On a personal and a professional level, this is 100% true. I maintain a personal bank account back in the UK and I had to send them an opinion by a tax accountant and a declaration that I was still a UK citizen with a notarized cover letter to my UK bank, to *stop* them from unilaterally closing my account.

        We have a significant population of US investors currently on secondment and/or extended transfer to non-US firms, and I’ve heard credible, completely anticipated horror stories, particularly those who thought they were ‘in the clear’ with the IRS until that whole UBS debacle. Suddenly, many of them have found that all their efforts to comply with US law as it stood before FATCA, counted for nothing.

        1. Good thing congress is on the case:

          http://www.forbes.com/sites/ke…..preparers/

    3. I like to call her Emily Mount, because…I’d like to mount her.

      1. I like to call her Emily “smoke my man” Blunt, because that is what I would like her to do.

      2. Something about this being why there are no libertarian women.

        1. The libertarian woman likes me, gosh.

    4. Just shut up and act. Or take your clothes off…

    5. So what earthly paradise was she a citizen of previously?

  34. This was going to be a Spot the Not, but I couldn’t find enough reals.

    The tried to join

    1. John Wayne tried to enlist during WW2, but the studio wouldn’t let him. He did visit wounded soldiers at hospitals in the South Pacific. He felt guilty about not serving for the rest of his life.

    2. John Milius tried to join the Marines during the Vietnam War, but was rejected because of asthma. He later wrote and directed the cult WW3 action movie Red Dawn.

    3. Bruce Willis tried to join after 9/11 but was too old. He did go visit troops in Iraq and did the “yipee kai yay…” line for them. There was much rejoicing.

    1. Bruce Willis would only reluctantly enlist if an giant asteroid was about to destroy earth.

      1. Would that Ben Affleck had been killed instead of Bruce….

    2. “John Milius tried to join the Marines during the Vietnam War, but was rejected because of asthma. He later wrote and directed the cult WW3 action movie Red Dawn.”

      On the set of Red Dawn, John Milius told Charlie Sheen that he used to dream about having the opportunity to ‘skim the tree tops of Vietnam and rain fire on children,’ and then he started laughing.

      To this day no one is quite sure if he was joking.

      1. A number of my fraternity brothers did Marine Officer Candidate School. I remember them singing a song, the chorus of which ends with, “Napalm sticks to kids!”

        And there was a poem about “them babies burnin’ in the night” yadda yadda yadda.

        It was pretty awesome stuff.

        1. Napalm Has No Friends….because napalm sticks to kids.

          /1985 Infantry School

    3. There was a British businessman whose name escapes me who had trouble joining the army and found a creative way to do it.

      When World War II broke out, his job was identified as a critical one for the war effort.

      As a result he was barred from joining the army. The law, however explicitly permitted people in those positions to run for office, so he ran for parliament. He won. The day after he was sworn in, he resigned from the parliament and enlisted.

      Winston Churchill made a crack to the effect that that man was the only one who would use the parliament as a stepping stone to get into the army. If only I could remember his name!

      1. His name was Fitzroy Maclean. He was in the diplomatic corp and wasn’t allowed to enlist, so he ran for office as you described. He wrote a wonderful book called “Eastern Approaches” describing his exploits in WWII. Went to North Africa, ran into a friend who was in the Long Range Desert Group, so he hitched a ride. Later he parachuted into Yugoslavia to be the Brit liason to Yito. He enlisted as a private and ended up a Brigadioer by war’s end.

  35. Not sure what I’m more disappointing in: no alt-text, or a morning link on a double murder simply because it involved guns.

  36. Pharaoh’s Snake

    Warty powder. (Mercury(II) thiocyanate decomposition is initiated by heating.)

  37. Jeremy Corbyn, a republican, will kiss hand of Queen, swear fealty

    Jeremy Corbyn will have to kneel before the Queen and kiss her hand while promising to be her “true and faithful servant” – despite wanting to abolish the monarchy.

    The new Labour leader, a republican, has agreed to join the Privy Council – a formal body of advisers to the Sovereign that comprises of senior government ministers and the Leader of the Opposition.

    Member, who are given the Right Honourable title, are given national security and intelligence briefings but Mr Corbyn has previously insisted he would not agree to join the largely ceremonial body.

    In the summer he told the Guardian he was “quite capable of having private discussions with anybody whether I have got a handle on my name or not”.

    But after Whitehall officials reportedly turned down Mr Corbyn’s calls for a different avenue to be found for him to receive security briefings, he decided to accept his invitation.

    It means he will have to attend Buckingham Palace, place one knee on a cushion, swear an oath of allegiance and brush the Queen’s hand with his lips and asked to “swear by Almighty God to be a true and faithful Servant unto The Queen’s Majesty as one of Her Majesty’s Privy Council”.

    I guess American politics could be worse in this regard.

    1. Have you not seen all the celebrity “How Will You Serve Obama” videos from the end of 2008-beginning of 2009?!

    2. Many years ago, I had a UK friend whose son-in-law’s father could actually arrange a meeting with the Queen. (He was head of the UK equivalent of the American Legion). So I often fantasized about meeting Elizabeth II – shake her hand and say, “How do you do, Mrs. Windsor.”
      Never got the chance.

      1. “How’s it hangin’, royal ugly dude?”

  38. Where’s John?

    Also, where’s Waldo?

    1. I’m guessing vacation or dead. Or maybe his bosses decided that he should actually do work.

      1. He does disappear now and then and in the past he has blamed work.

      2. I hate when that happens.

    2. John is Kim Davis?

      1. That explains… so much.

        1. Almost all of it, actually.

  39. Caught Trump’s latest commercial this morning in a crowded lobby waiting for the elevator. I could not contain my laughter/disdain at “I’m going to build a really, really BIG wall.” I was the only one laughing.

    1. That’s because everyone else realised all in all they’re just another brick in the really, really BIG wall

      1. Trump fans don’t need no education.

      1. It’s the same one where he says rapists and murderers are going to really be sorry when he’s President. It’s a classic.

    2. WE’LL CALL IT THE GREAT WALL OF TRUMP

      1. He really didn’t say “UUUUUGGE” wall?

        1. All the first page links on Google and Dogpile with ‘trump campaign commercial’ point to spoofs.

          Linky?

          1. I just saw it two hours ago. Stream some shitty CNN. You might catch it before lunch.

          2. I don’t think it was a spoof. It was him, his voice saying his words.

          3. How can you tell the difference?

  40. Ugh.

    I’m so happy that our state is finally going after the scofflaws who buy RV’s in another state and fail to send 6.5% of the money back to Minnesoda.

    Minnesota Revenue Department officials said on Monday that the latest was a man who failed to appear in court on charges of avoiding state taxes. He was found by police in Florida and sent back to face Minnesota tax evasion charges. He pleaded guilty.

    http://www.duluthnewstribune.c…..x-payments

    Hmmm… Maybe the reason the guy didn’t appear in court was because he was living in Florida?

    I’m stunned that Minnesoda thinks it is owed money if you buy something in a different state. I’m a little worried myself now because I bought my last car one county over because my home county of Hennepin has an extra sales tax for the Twins stadium. Am I now a tax outlaw because I decided to buy my car based on avoiding a tax?

    1. When I lived in Pennsylvania, they did the same thing if you bought a car in Delaware.

      1. Engagement ring stores advertise that they’re just over to border in Delaware so you don’t pay sales tax, though.

        1. I think it was just for cars. You’d have to pay the tax when you registered the car in PA. This was 10 years ago though, I may be misremembering.

    2. So “sending” back to MN in custody was worth the fine?

    3. I don’t imagine there are any people who live in states with sales tax who aren’t tax outlaws (or scofflaws, anyway).

    4. This has been going between California and Oregon forever. CA, and probably other states as well, have something called a ‘Use Tax’. When you buy something from another state you are supposed to declare this purchase and pay your local sales tax.

      1. Ditto between NH and ME.

        1. I don’t know about Maine, but from time to time Mass. tries to get certain businesses in NH to collect sales taxes on their behalf. Which of course doesn’t fly as being a non-sales-tax state surrounded by sales tax states is a big thing for NH.

    5. I don’t know how they do it round your way, but around here when you register a new car you must bring proof that you paid sales tax on it. Doesn’t matter where you purchased it, they care only that taxes have been paid. If you’ve got proof that you paid equal or greater than the local tax rate, then you’re off the hook. If you paid anything less than the local tax rate, then you must pay them the difference before they’ll let you register the vehicle.

      Taxes must be paid.

      1. And on top of that there is an excise tax that is based not on what you paid, but on the original blue book value.

        1. Can’t let people get away with buying a car for $1 from a relative or something.

      2. If I buy a car in Ventura County, CA and park it in Los Angeles County, CA I have to pay the 1% difference in sales tax to Los Angeles Country.

        This is unenforceable with a refrigerator or the like. But the CA BOE (Board of Equalization) has its jaws locked around car dealers.

      3. Back in the day, a California company had to pay a tax on inventory held on 12/31. So companies would put the really valuable small stuff – jewelry, electronics -in a trailer and haul it to Nevada on 12/30 and the Nevada dealer would “return” it on 1/2. Wasn’t in Cal. on 12/31 so no tax. I wonder if that “loophole” was ever closed?

    6. Anyone remember the California Smog Impact Fee?

  41. I saw somebody post this on Facebook and now I’m wondering if suicide is an option.

    1. Goddammit I’m stupid today.

      … Donald Trump President …GOP 2016 Nomination ….Cabinet picks Rudolf Giuliani , Ted Cruz ,Ben Carson, Trey Goudy and Allen West ,Sarah Palin , Newt Gingrich , ….its not a personal attack on Politics But…it is strictly business…”Legal Americans”

  42. “The U.S. “would go crazy if China did this to us,” says Microsoft about DOJ attempt to compel email data stored overseas.”

    Kinda like the IRS demanding deposit info from every bank in the world?

    1. Not exactly, but If email was like money I’d be rich.

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