Tom Brady Is Back in the Game, Trump Signs Loyalty Pledge, Dylann Roof Faces Death Penalty: P.M. Links

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  • Oh, THAT explains my Twitter feed today.
    Credit: Keith Allison / photo on flickr

    A judge has vacated the four-game suspension lodged against Patriots quarterback Tom Brady in that whole "deflategate" scandal with the underinflated footballs. The judge ruled that Brady was essentially not provided appropriate due process.

  • The father of the dead Syrian toddler whose body was photographed washed ashore in Turkey has spoken out in despair, saying, "Everything I was dreaming of is gone." The father was the only survivor of the family's attempt to flee to Canada.
  • Kim Davis, the Kentucky clerk who has refused to hand out marriage licenses despite court orders to do so has been found in contempt and sent to jail.
  • Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee's "loyalty pledge" not to run as a third-party candidate if he doesn't get the nomination.
  • South Carolina will seek the death penalty against Dylann Roof for killing nine people at a black church in Charleston.
  • A new study shows that, at least in Los Angeles County, there's very little correlation between the eating habits of individuals and their proximity to fast food restaurants or grocery stores, throwing the concept of "food deserts" into further question.
  • Three corrections officers in Santa Clarita, California, have been arrested and charged with beating an inmate to death last week in a county jail.  

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  1. Kim Davis, the Kentucky clerk who has refused to hand out marriage licenses despite court orders to do so has been found in contempt and sent to jail.

    Did the judge let Barabbas go instead?

    1. Oh? First I’ve heard of this…

    2. Hello.

      The NFL has balls to appeal.

      1. Who run Bradytown?

    3. Bawwabas? But I thought you just asked for Woger the Wapist to be released.

      1. +1 Biggus Dickus

        1. +1 “Fwo him to the gwound – wuffwee….”

  2. Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee’s “loyalty pledge” not to run as a third-party candidate if he doesn’t get the nomination.

    You know who else made people take pledges?

    1. My elementary school teachers?

    2. The Boy Scouts of America?

      1. yes I answered my own hitler question. What do you want to do about it?

        1. Make you a social pariah.

          1. You know who else is a social pariah?

            1. Episiarch.

              /not a question

            2. Libertarians?

            3. Pariah Carey?

              1. You…I mean…just..

                *shakes head and walks away*

    3. NPR wants me to pledge munny. Does that count?

    4. Scouts Canada leaders?

      1. My daughter was in Sparks. Her leader could get a little snarky at times the little shit.

        1. Angst in My Pants, good song…

          1. “Talent is an Asset” is a personal favorite.

            Albert is smart, he’s a genius
            Watch Albert putter, an obvious genius
            Someday he will reassess the world
            And he’ll still have time for lots of girls

            When he grows up he’ll remember us
            When he grows up we are sure that he’ll remember us

            We made sure that Albert wore his mac
            We kept all the strangers off his back

            [Chorus:]
            (Go away)
            Everything’s relative
            (Go away Albert’s mother does say to me)
            We are his relatives and he don’t need any non-relatives

            Talent is an asset
            You’ve got to understand that
            Talent is an asset
            And little Albert has it
            Talent is an asset
            And Albert surely has it

            One day he’ll sever his apron strings
            All of the while he’ll be scribbling things, genius things
            Look at Albert, isn’t he a sight
            Growing, growing at the speed of light

            [Chorus]

            Talent is an asset
            And little Albert has it

            Talent is relative
            That’s hypothetical
            We are his relatives
            That’s parenthetical
            Spare your superlatives
            There’s the receptacle
            There’s the receptacle

            1. Leave Albert’s study room
              Leave Albert’s happy home
              Leave Albert’s neighborhood
              Leave Albert’s city, too
              Leave Albert’s country seat
              Leave Albert’s coun-ter-y
              Leave Albert’s continent
              Leave Albert’s hemisphere
              Leave Albert’s planet, too
              Leave Albert’s universe

              No one must see him now
              Only the medical
              No one must downgrade him
              Don’t be to cynical
              Don’t be to critical
              Cancel the magazines
              They’re much to political
              Don’t buy him any jeans
              They’re much to casual
              Talent is relative
              That’s hypothetical
              We are his relatives
              That’s parenthetical

      1. Nice; but not quite correct.

    5. “Trump also promises not to get pregnant during the race.”

      1. “Trump further promises that he will not attempt to run for the Senate while he’d President.”

        1. “Trump regrets hazing accident at his sorority and also promises world peace.”

    6. Captain Black?

    7. My college fraternity?

      1. dammit. thread was broken up and I didn’t see you

        1. Hitler?

    8. You know who else made people take pledges?

      My old fraternity with the house Little Sisters?

  3. South Carolina will seek the death penalty against Dylann Roof for killing nine people at a black church in Charleston.

    And for singlehandedly killing the Rebel flag.

    1. The additional Hate Crime charge will ensure he’s extra dead. That’ll teach ‘im!

    2. I still find it weird that Dylann Roof’s crime lead to the taking down of the rebel flag. I mean how were these things in any way related? Were the SJW types suggesting that the flag somehow made Dylann commit his crime?

      It’s so weird.

      1. Critical Mass. The push against the dreaded Confederate flag has been building for years. This incident served as the tipping point. If it hadn’t been this incident, it would have been something else over the next few years.

      2. how were these things in any way related?

        Whoa! Look who’s *begging* to be first to the Goodthink Re-Education Centre”!!

      3. And how does Gold’s Gym still exist?

        Trigger warning: photo of that psychopath burning the American flag while wearing a Gold’s tank.

        1. What are wristwatches and bowl cuts, chopped liver?

        2. Gold’s actually seems to be expanding again. It’s very strange. They just opened a location in a strip mall near me in Akron, OH.

        3. OK but that dude doesn’t look like he ever even drove by a gym.

      4. I think the flag was in one of his selfies.

    3. This shouldn’t be funny…I guess I’m a morbid sob.

  4. Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee’s “loyalty pledge” not to run as a third-party candidate if he doesn’t get the nomination.

    Of course, he had his fingers crossed when he signed it.

    1. Yup. Anyone who believes a word that pompous buffoon says is not paying attention.

      1. I haven’t been paying attention.

        What exactly has he lied about? Has he even been caught in a lie? A lie comparable to “what difference does it make” or “I have no classified emails”?

        Personally I don’t like what he says and i believe him when he says things I don’t like.

    2. Trump is a master of negotiation.

      He knows that every agreement is subject to re-negotiation, particularly agreements that are in no way enforceable.

  5. A new study shows that, at least in Los Angeles County, there’s very little correlation between the eating habits of individuals and their proximity to fast food restaurants or grocery stores, throwing the concept of “food deserts” into further question.

    Is “question” the new word for complete, utter and self-evident bullshit?

    1. Nearly every fast food place I have lived near within a few visits I get sick of it.

      Maybe there is some genetic ape code in my brain that tells me “massive doses of fat salt and sugar are special treats and require more effort then a 1 min walk/drive to get”

      1. remember: sugar very bad for you, fat and salt not so much

  6. Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee’s “loyalty pledge” not to run as a third-party candidate if he doesn’t get the nomination.

    That’s bad negotiating.

    1. “I’m not running as a third party. The Republicans or the Democrats can decide which of them is the third party. My party is the classy party, the winner, not for the losers. My party is #1!!”

      /Trump Voice

    2. A game with the headlines: sign a pledge, get back in the game, face the death penalty. I certainly don’t want to see Roofe back in the game, but I don’t want Brady back in the game either and I wouldn’t trust him even if he did sign a pledge, but Trump and the death penalty is also hard to resist. Tough decisions here.

  7. Tom Brady is so easy to hate. Fuck the Patriots. Fuck Bill Belichick. I can’t wait to see them back to their mid 90s form after he retires.

    1. I’m agnostic on this (I know – how is that possible) but I thoroughly enjoy the hatred.

      Let it flow through you! Feel the rage!

      1. Well then fuck you too.

        1. Hah!

    2. Due process for workplace discipline? I’m sure there are plenty of non-Union employees who wished they’d known about that right.

    3. Lean closer, I want to taste those sweet sweet tears…

  8. So, I totally forgot that, while figure skating is out of bounds of the feature, Accomplished Female Athletes of Eastern and Central Europe has no problem with speed skating. To compensate for it, I present Tatiana Borodulina. Born in Russia, she skated for Australia before moving back to Russia in time for Sochi Olympics. She won four European Championship golds, 3 silvers and a bronze. Sadly, she did poorly in Sochi, getting disqualified for false starts.
    She was famous (or infamous -isn’t that like famous, only better) for being the first photo in any tut-tutting article (that was oddly loaded with pictures) about the calendar Russian female athletes put out before Sochi.
    And to break with tradition, here’s a video of various images of her I couldn’t find in one place.

    1. The racy shoot is racy.

  9. A new study shows that, at least in Los Angeles County, there’s very little correlation between the eating habits of individuals and their proximity to fast food restaurants or grocery stores, throwing the concept of “food deserts” into further question.

    Like that’s going to actually stop anyone from continuing to claim a problem.

  10. I am sure this has been discussed on HnR already, but I just found it today: Girl pushes boyfriend to commit suicide.

    My “favorite” part- “”Even though I could not save my boyfriend’s life, I want to put myself out here to try to save as many other lives as possible,” she wrote on Facebook.”

    1. Her attorney argues, however, that the charges should be dropped because Carter’s messages are protected by free speech.

      Well, except for the message “You can soon be as peaceful as the Confederate Flag.”

    2. I agree with most that this girl is a total cunt, but her stupid boyfriend chose to end it (probably to get away from her). She’s horrible and should be shamed and shunned, but I don’t see how she can be charged with a crime.

      1. What gives me pause is that when he was in the middle of trying to kill himself (via carbon monoxide), he got out of the car and she talked him into getting back in and finishing it.

        She nuts.

        1. But he dead.

          She wins.

        2. Damn, took too long to type.

      2. #DeadBoyfriendLivesMatter

      3. She apparently was on the phone with him while he was doing it. He got out of the car as the carbon monoxide started to take effect, and she talked him into getting back in.

        That’s to the point were her crazy seems a danger to others.

        1. her crazy seems a danger to others.

          Only people crazy enough to listen to her. Would like to see her prosecuted, but how can you without creating a dangerous slippery slope? Should an author be held liable if something they wrote encouraged someone to kill themselves?

          1. I was actually thinking of the requirements for forced institutionalization. You have to be a danger to yourself or others, but yes, it is a slippery slope.

          2. I agree with most that this girl is a total cunt, but her stupid boyfriend chose to end it (probably to get away from her).

            Based on my reading of the story, he was a very depressed individual and she actively pushed him over the course of several days to kill himself. Even in conversations where he never brought it up, she’d ask him, “So why haven’t you done it yet?”

            Free speech, maybe, but I won’t be sad if she’s thrown in jail. The hell with slippery slopes. People like that inherently undermine society just by virtue of their own Munchausen-by-proxy narcissism, and it’s better that she be made a cautionary tale.

          3. “but how can you without creating a dangerous slippery slope?”

            Should Charles Manson be in jail for murder? I mean all he did was tell people to kill…

            1. Should Charles Manson be in jail for murder?

              No. In fact, I’ve always found it odd that he was charged with murder when he wasn’t even there. However, he provided an incentive (just like someone hiring a hitman) for his ‘family’ to follow through (his approval). So, I consider him even worse than this girl (who offered NO incentive to the guy killing himself) and I’m glad he’s in prison.

      4. He did chose to end it. But it seems like he wouldn’t have done it without her repeated and insistent demands that he do it. He was a troubled kid and she took advantage of him.

        What an awful person. It’s sad people like that exist.

      5. Having read the article, she’s at least partially responsible.

        1. Hah! Lookit DorkBoy? over hear, “reading the articles”. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

          1. POEZ LAW!!!!!!!@!

            I PWND myself…

        2. she’s at least partially responsible.

          Agreed, and I hope she someday realizes what she did (which seems unlikely since she sounds like a sociopath). But I have a hard time criminalizing speech. If she’d had a more active hand in encouraging his suicide I could see it, but all she did was speak. He chose to do as she instructed, for whatever reason. Btw, suicide (or attempted suicide) should not be a crime.

            1. She was basically just tired of him whining about it.

          1. Just so we’re clear, when your crazy girlfriend with issues says she’s thinking about really doing it this time and you say, “down, not across” and break up with her, is that depraved indifference or just being done with the crazy?

    3. Yeah, she apparently started trying to become a leader is some community group afterwards citing wanting to save other people from her boyfriends fate.

      1. Is that any worse than HIV-positive Magic Johnson giving advice on how to avoid AIDS, or frequently-pregnant Bristol Palin preaching abstinence? Most of the prominent voices in these groups are the last people who should be giving advice.

        1. Yes it’s different. Magic Johnson didn’t actively try to give himself AIDS. This woman wasn’t just careless, or made a foolish mistake. She actively tried, and succeeded to push her boyfriend to suicide.

        2. frequently-pregnant Bristol Palin preaching abstinence

          Not that she’s the best spokesperson for that cause, but two pregnancies in seven years is hardly a frequent fertility rate.

          1. two pregnancies in seven years is hardly a frequent fertility rate.

            For someone who has never been married yet tells everyone else to wait until marriage, two unplanned pregnancies is astonishingly high.

          2. It is when you’re unmarried and teaching other people that they shouldn’t have sex until they’re married in order to avoid the exact kind of pregnancies you can’t seem to stop having.

    4. Wow. Her kind of “help” I’d be careful about accepting….

    5. If that was my son, I don’t think I’d attend the proceedings–I’d have a hard time not sneaking a shiv into the courtroom to use against her.

    6. It’s things like this that remind of a saying: better alone than with bad company

    7. She even looks like the type. You know. The type CSI loves to profile.

      1. Those forehead lines and the large noggin make me wonder if she’s part Klingon. It would explain a lot.

      1. True dat

    8. “After his death, Carter became a self-proclaimed advocate for mental health.”

      It sounds like everyone else on Tumblr who’s just *dying* to be diagnosed with a ‘mental illness’ and create a new gender for themselves which they can say is being oppressed.

  11. Spot the Not: military training accidents

    1. A Marine drill seargent woke his platoon in the middle of the night and ordered them to wade into a deep creek. Some could not swim and 6 drowned.

    2. This Air Force pilot died while attempting to do a barrel roll in a B-52. He was practicing for an air show. 3 other crew members were killed.

    3. This Navy rescue swimmer trainee drowned after being repeatedly held under water by an instructor. The trainee had tried to drop out from the program, but was pressured to stay in.

    4. This Marine died from dehydration after being left alone in the desert with no water, map, or compass. The men in charge of him forgot where he was and did not report he was missing for almost 2 days.

    5. These 14 soldiers drowned while trying to wade from an island to the mainland during low tide.

    6. These 4 paratroopers died during a mass airborne training exercise. 2 died because their chutes did not open properly and the others died in landing accidents. 71 other paratroopers were injured. Sudden wind gusts were the cause.

    1. Is a barrel roll in a B-52 even possible? If it was, I would think it would be too wide a feat for an airshow.

      1. Pretty certain it’s possible.

        1. Let’s steal one and go try it!

          *runs to get the pickup truck to head to the Air Force base*

          1. Aw hells yeah!
            *grabs bolt cutters*

            1. *waves tiny American flag that Florida Man gave me while driving*

            2. I’m going to assume that you grabbed the bolt cutters because you already had the bottle of whiskey stashed in the truck?

        2. Pretty certain it’s possible.

          It is not. And I’m not talking out of my ass because I worked on and even flew aboard B-52s in the Air Force.

          1. I’d have you hold me beer while me and Florida Man find out for our own DAMNED selves, but I ain’t giving my beer to no one!

            WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

            1. B-52s are proof that anything will fly if you attach 8 jet engines to it.

          2. It might be. Similar airframe to the 707, which can barrel roll.

            And by barrel roll, I mean dutch roll. It’s a 1G maneuver.

            1. Each of the pilots I asked said it wasn’t possible. Not only are they very old (the ones I worked on were all built in the late ’50s), they’re very heavy and slow and a barrel roll would cause the engines to stall (and B-52s need ALL their engines to stay aloft). Although the fact it’s never been done isn’t proof it CAN’T be done…

              1. 52Gs are aluminum.

                I fault our pilots for not even trying.

              2. To even have a prayer, you’d have to do it basically on no gas. Even if it were the 1G variety (an actual barrel roll vs. the aileron roll most people think of), I would think the wings would not like flexing under much load when inverted.

              3. Maybe:

                A Boeing sibling of the B-52, the “Dash 80” prototype of the 707 airliner, was put through a barrel roll over an awed crowd by its test pilot, the late Alvin M. “Tex” Johnson, who also flew the first B-52 on April 15, 1952. There’s no proof a B-52 has ever done a barrel roll, but Cole said he heard that one of the bombers made this spectacular maneuver over Hanoi while evading a missile during the costly “Linebacker II” missions in December 1972.

                “I don’t think he went down,” Cole said. “He regained control of it.”

          3. But you didn’t kill yourself proving that it’s not possible like #2 guy did, did you, Mr. Aerodynamical? Nooooo, you just wanna sit here safe and sober and tell us what’s theoretically unpossible.

      2. A barrel roll sounds plausible. I’ll bet it’s really ugly to watch, though, because there’s no way he’s keeping the rotation axis anywhere near level.

    2. I’m going with #2. That seems really stupid and irresponsible. But all my plane knowledge comes from F-15 strike eagle for Sega Genesis, so what do I know.

      1. Better than my plane knowledge, which comes from Top Gun for the NES. F*** that game.

        I’m guessing it’s #2 as well though.

        1. I start playing Destiny and I’ve decided I hate it.

        2. Jeez, didn’t any of you play Flight of the Intruder for NES?

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9ouca41N0k

        3. Ace Combat 4 for the PS2 was the shit.

        4. I’ve never landed that plane once. Not even by accident. What was level 2 like?

          1. It required a midair refueling – needless to say I never made it to level 3

    3. On #2, he wasn’t trying to barrel roll. He just exceeded the max bank angle and stalled out.

        1. Jesus, that’s hard to watch…

          1. The report is even worse. That guy was a ticking time bomb.

            1. Every AF pilot wants to fly fighters. Those who don’t get to often push the limits of the aircraft they’re trained for. My sympathies go to his crew since they had no voice when it came to his reckless flying. Plus, it’s sad to see a BUFF go out in that way.

    4. Pretty sure I remember 2 and 3. 4 probably happens all the time in the 29 Palms, China Lake region. 6 sounds perfectly reasonable.

      I’m going to go with #5 as the NOT.

    5. 2 is indeed the Not. The pilot was not practicing for an air show; it was a final flight before his retirement ceremony. The pilot had got in trouble many times before for reckless flying.

      God damn it, Maverick!

      The rest in order are: the Ribbon Creek incident, the Lee Mirecki incident, the Jason Rother incident,
      the Kurkse incident, and the Gallant Eagle incident.

      Your prize is this depressing Russian war song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHMA6XKoLuA

      1. Also, the maneuver he attempted was a wingover, not a barrel roll.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wingover

        1. According to Wikipedia, no, he just turned too tightly.

    6. #1 is true.

      Fucking great American Chesty Puller even sort of condoned it.

      The trial’s most dramatic moment, however, was the arrival of General Lewis “Chesty” Puller, the most decorated Marine in the history of the Corps. Berman called Puller to testify about training methods. Although having some very harsh private words for McKeon, Puller called the incident in Ribbon Creek “a deplorable accident”, but one that did not warrant court martial. He said that discipline was the most important factor in military training. He quoted Napoleon in saying that an army becomes a “mob” without it. He mentioned his experiences in the Korean War and one of the reasons troops failed was because of lack of night training. General Puller felt that the press had blown this incident out of proportion because of prejudice they had against the Marine Corps. He mentioned a similar accident at an Army post where ten soldiers drowned and pointed out that none of their superiors had been charged and that it had never made headlines the way Ribbon Creek did.

  12. Kim Davis, the Kentucky clerk who has refused to hand out marriage licenses despite court orders to do so has been found in contempt and sent to jail.

    You know who else answered to a higher authority?

    1. Now I want a hot dog.

      1. I doubt even Hebrews can make a hot dog that’s edible.

    2. Judge Dred?

    3. Stannis Baratheon?

      1. Out of the group of people I watch GoT with, I’m the only one who likes Stanis and wants him to win it all.

        1. I was completely on his side until episode 9 last season.

          1. I’m watch last season now. I haven’t gotten to EP 9 yet.

            1. I haven’t gotten to EP 9 yet.

              That’s…umm,…well….hmmm….

              1. SPOILED!!!!!

            2. Yeah………

    4. How far away are we from jailing people for their political beliefs? 10, 20 years maybe?

      1. Don’t be old-fashioned. Today we just create social media mobs which hound people out of their jobs and forever mark them as outcasts.

    5. Fieldmarshal Keitel?

    6. Sauron?

    7. Alcoholics Anonymous members?

  13. California Created Single-Party General Elections And Now They’re More Competitive Than Ever:

    Yes, now voters have the choice between a Marxist AND a Leninist.

    1. Agreed. The point missing from the “study” is that now, no other parties are represented on the general election ballot. In the past, even though those candidates might not win, they were at least represented. Since the “Top two” are selected via the primary, where turnout is often very weak, there is almost no chance a third party candidate will be seen by the overall electorate.

  14. Three corrections officers in Santa Clarita, California, have been arrested and charged with beating an inmate to death last week in a county jail.

    This ties in nicely to something I was going to post anyway:

    OpenJustice: CA DOJ has set up a website to provide transparency on violence within the justice system including arrest rates, deaths in custody etc.

    A transparency initiative led by the CA Department of Justice that publishes criminal justice data so we can understand how we are doing, hold ourselves accountable, and improve public policy to make California safer.

  15. Shameless self-promotion again. Selling merch promoting individual liberty. http://www.zazzle.com/freeonedesign Check it out. New stuff there, and more to come.

  16. Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee’s completely non-binding and unenforceable “loyalty pledge” not to run as a third-party candidate if he doesn’t get the nomination.

    FTFY

  17. I’d think more highly of Kim Davis if she’d have shouted out, “THIS WHOLE COURT IS OUT OF ORDER!!!!”

  18. Three corrections officers in Santa Clarita, California, have been arrested and charged with beating an inmate to death last week in a county jail.

    There was either video, the guards weren’t liked or the inmate was special in some way.

    1. Here’s why:

      “The newspaper said they work under the sheriff’s office, but are not fully sworn deputies.”

      1. So they’re basically civilians.

        1. All cops are civilians.

          1. Sounds like you want to be downgraded to suspect.

      2. If only they’d sworn, like Donald Trump did.

  19. Famous Arab musician sings in English:

    https://youtu.be/IGYJSPmiWSs?t=1m28s

    Heard it for the first time when I was in Tanzania. It was for a cell phone commercial.

  20. OMG the Smug: How Fox News Brainwashes its viewers.

    Over the last ten years, everyone I know has lost a friend or family member or mentor to Fox News… they have watched helplessly as people they love have become part of the conservative punditry herd and, over time, traded their compassion for paranoia; their thoughtful opinions for manufactured outrage; and their empathy for hateful rhetoric.

    … a study conducted by Cambridge’s Journal of Politics found that all Americans ? not just evangelical Christians or diehard Republicans ? are susceptible to Fox News’ message. Democratic members of Congress became more sympathetic to Republican causes after being exposed to Fox News. Their hostility toward Mexican immigration increased, for example, as did their belief in inaccuracies about climate change and the Iraq war. Fox News deliberately misinforms its viewers about things like climate change to score political capital, and most scientists now believe the earth is on the brink of its sixth mass extinction. Fox News not only fosters a culture of terror and hate; it also purposefully contributes to the destruction of the literal planet.

    1. Autostraddle *isn’t* a parody site?

    2. Why are all the commenters girls? Gross.

      “Fox News not only fosters a culture of terror and hate; it also purposefully contributes to the destruction of the literal planet.”

      Ha, ha. Funny.

      But sad.

      1. Why are all the commenters girls? Gross.

        You don’t expect any women to be posting *here*, do you?

      2. LITERAL planet, Rufus. LITERAL.

      3. the literal planet.

        Isn’t that one of the worlds in the Marvel universe?

      4. THE LITERAL PLANET, BRO

        They aren’t destroying some figurative planet we can afford to lose.

        1. It’s a planet covered with litter.

    3. a study conducted by Cambridge’s Journal of Politics found that all Americans ? not just evangelical Christians or diehard Republicans ? are susceptible to Fox News’ message. Democratic members of Congress became more sympathetic to Republican causes after being exposed to Fox News.

      LOL, if you listen to opposing viewpoints, sometimes you discover those viewpoints aren’t evil and might actually be right about some things!

      This used to be called ‘reasoned debate’ but now it’s called brainwashing.

    4. Changing only the POV, one could substitute “PBS” for “Fox” and have exactly the same article.

      I don’t have to like Fox to recognize that the author of the article is full of bullshit. (Or cowshit in this case.)

    5. “the destruction of the literal planet.”

      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY
      LITERALLY

      1. Look, GILMORE, they’re showing that there’s a difference between destruction of a literal planet and destruction of a virtual planet. Duh.

      2. Maybe they meant Littoral planet? Cause you know Faux News promotes global warming which is causing sea levels to rise and destroying the coastlines everywhere?

    6. Oh my God, the best part are the fucking charts where they label things that are a matter of debate ‘false’ and then claim Fox News viewers are ‘misinformed’ for believing things that are arguably true.

      On healthcare, this includes statements like: “undocumented workers will receive free healthcare” (how won’t they? Are hospitals going to let them die?), “The government is taking over healthcare” (it isn’t nationalizing it, but ‘taking over’ can mean any number of things and this is certainly increasing state control), “Taxpayer dollars will fund abortion” (they do. The argument that money goes to non-abortion activities doesn’t change the fact that by subsidizing other activities of PP, the state is effectively freeing up funds for use on abortion. Sorry liberals who don’t want to admit this), and “death panels” (which Howard Dean now admits is basically true).

      So they took four statements that can be argued to be true, claimed they’re false, and then decried Fox News viewers as less informed than MSNBC viewers based on four cherrypicked assertions that aren’t even untrue. Logic!

    7. Note that all of the “false” things about Obamacare are more or less true.

      And I love the leftist meme of “Fox News creates manufactured outrage.” Because leftists never, ever “manufacture outrage.”

    1. Oh Mike. You’re cute when you’re retarded.

      1. So always. Got it.

    2. MOAR KULCHER WORZ!!!!!111!!!1!!!1!!

    3. I had no clue he was running for President again. What’s the point?

    4. Being a government employee is prof of guilt.

      1. And proof too.

    5. If they thought they could burn her at the stake, they would. She’s a heretic from their own party, the worst kind of heretic.

  21. There is an ancient monument in Ohio called the Serpent Mound. It is a mound in the shape of a very large snake. Little is known about who built it and why. I found this cartoon about it.

    1. Ha. Of course people make the same claim about the pyramids in Egypt, even though they contain paintings that show how they were built.

  22. Angry Trump fans sending hilarious emails to woman whose name is Megan Kelly (no relation to Megyn Kelly).

    They taught me some very interesting ways of spelling words and punctuating sentences that I didn’t used to know were grammatically correct.

    1. Megan Kelly is a MORAN. Vote Trunp 2016!

  23. Risking creating a sports sub tread, but WTF does a court have to do with a private company punishing an employee? Taking about Tom Brady.

    1. Exactly! It should be the *US Congress*, not a court!

    2. Depends on what’s in the contract.

      1. Fair point. I guess I could sue my employer if I was punished in some unfair way, but I’d more likely just quit.

        1. Those 4 games are worth several million dollars, and potentially, another Super Bowl championship.

          My understanding was that the arbitrator had the final say, so IDK what authority the court had to stick its nose in.

          1. The fact that Goodell named himself as arbitrator, inheritantly not independent.

            I hate the Patriots and Tom Brady’s zmug ass.

    3. It may have to do with how their monopoly was granted.

      1. Talk to Goodell, they ran to NY court to get their arbitration ruling confirmed. Brady would have appealed, but the NFL actually filed in court. Anyone paying the slightest attention would see the NFL was inept, petty, unfair and capricious is their rulings. Rare to overturn arbitration rulings, but judge gave at least 3 reasons he overturned it. NFL office is as incompetent as the game is popular

        1. The most amazing thing I learned today – Roger Goodell’s annual base salary is $44,000,000 – exactly double the highest paid player in the NFL (Aaron Rogers).

          And he’s a blithering idiot. Incredible.

          1. Yeah, he truly is. He’s like poorly built robot that gets its string pulled but can only repeat 4 different catch phrases

            1. Is Goodell supposed to show up in Foxboro next Thursday to present the trophy? That would be hilarious.

              1. No. First time not there since started playing opening TH night games with SB champs. Hmmm wonder why? He’s gonna be at the concert that’s NFL is having in SanFran to go along with game in NE.

    4. And so many people think this is a good precedent because it makes Goodell look bad and they hate him.

      1. It is a good precedent, because they tried to deprive a union member of 1/4 his salary without any evidence or precedent. Actually said to judge that it doesn’t matter if they have no evidence, denied NFL players association access to witnesses, access to interview notes, admitted that Goodell wasn’t impartial, and that the punishment was made up and without any reasoning. They claim being able to address integrity of the game allows Goodell to do anything and then rule the appeal process of his own punishment. At the end of the day, they didn’t record pre game readings, know about pressure/temp relationship, switched guages during and then claimed .2psi (not 2, but .2) was “possibly” let out of 2-3 balls but they aren’t sure. Despite that they compared Brady to a steroid user and suspended him 4 games. I am not a fan of unions, but this was about breach of CBA contract

      2. Hilarious that it was the NFL that filed the suit – and they got absolutely destroyed.

    5. I think there is a collective bargaining agreement and the argument was that the NFL was in violation of the bargaining agreement that they signed.

    6. Courts enforce contracts when allegedly breached.

      Also, they broke the #1 rule of football, which is that the rules don’t apply to Brady and Belichick.

      1. I assume the other owners have been encouraging the league’s efforts because they feel the rules do not apply to the Pats.

      2. Oooo – I can SMELL the jealous!

        *not a Brady nor Pats fan, but the hatred is delish

        1. I don’t care for sports. The only reason I commented is it seemed odd that a court was butting in to a private matter, but I hadn’t really considered the contract violation aspect.

          1. I don’t care for sports.

            Given this, shouldn’t you have to turn in your Florida Man moniker?

            I thought everyone in Florida was required to be a sports fan, especially during the annual Florida vs Georgia football game.

            1. I went to UF for undergrad, saw some games in the swamp, but it just never really took. I’ll still watch Gator football if it’s on, but I’ve gone whole seasons without catching a game.

          2. NFL was the one that filed in court to get arbitration award confirmed. OOPS!

          3. NFL was the one that filed in court to get arbitration award confirmed. OOPS!

            1. Judge also ruled that squirrel infestations were a breach of site/commenter contract

        2. Saints fan still bitter about being scapegoated over bounties that all teams were doing, while Brady and Belichick repeatedly get caught cheating without consequence.

          1. YES! Let the hatred FLOW through you, T-o-M!

          2. “Brady and Belichick repeatedly get caught cheating without consequence.”

            Bullshit. They were docked a first round pick in 2007 for Spygate, where other teams (Jets, Broncos) were caught doing the same thing (or worse) for little or no punishment. And now they’ve lost another first round pick for an infraction that calls for a $25k punishment in the CBA.

            As a Saints fan, you should be bitter about the vindictive retards in the NFL front office. But Pats fans have even more reason to despise Goodell.

            1. +4 Super Bowl Rings

            2. To be fair, the Broncos probably didn’t get docked because that dipshit Joshie McHoodie was the coach at the time. The league probably figured he was just emulating his sugar daddy Belichick and didn’t know any better.

              1. If my team were continually emasculated by BB and Brady I would be a bitter troll too. It’s cool, I understand. Do save those tears, though. I’ll add them to my drinks for flavor.

    1. Get the fuck out of here! A company…wants to make money?

      1. By SELLING me fucking food?

        What the actual FUCK has this country come to??

    2. Evil bastards.

    3. Most of their readership could do with a Vox Explainer? about why companies do things. Stuff like, profit, opportunity cost, investment etc.

    4. Well it did annoy me whenever I was one minute late for breakfast. Sorta like Michael Douglas in Falling Down. Dude just wanted a burger.

      1. They were just telling you that because they didn’t like you. They still served breakfast to the guy behind you.

      2. “Dude, franchisees run the stores…it’s not us in Corporate….”

        *backing away from Rufus with arms raised*

    5. This reminds me of the great old John Stossel segment, where he interviews people in the meat supply chain to New York and asks them if they are doing their jobs because they like New Yorkers and want to help them.

    6. This move will probably actually cost McDonalds money as the profit margin on lunch/dinner items are much higher than breakfast items.

      1. That assumes people substitute breakfast items for dinner items. It’s also possible some people just want the breakfast items and wouldn’t even go to McDonalds otherwise, in which case you’ll have a higher volume of sales.

        1. Exactly; I don’t know how many times I’ve looked at the clock at 10:15 and said, I’m not going there just to end up being two minutes late.

        1. And the profit on sodas is close to 100%

          1. Yup, which is why I get free water when I can.

    7. Not just any money, but PROFITS!!!! OH NOS!!!!11!!!

  24. The father of the dead Syrian toddler whose body was photographed washed ashore in Turkey has spoken out in despair, saying, “Everything I was dreaming of is gone.” The father was the only survivor of the family’s attempt to flee to Canada.

    Oh, fuck. Why us?

    1. It does seem like a long boat ride.

      1. Why didn’t they just take dog sleds? The water’s frozen, right?

  25. Epileptic Mexican Child Given Weed

    – Not old enough for Ass-Sex, say lawyers, but they’re working on it.

    1. What about deep dish pizza and abortion?

      1. Yes, they both cause bleeding out of her….whatever….

        1. +1 Trumpbump

    2. Weigel’s Cock-ring disagrees.

  26. We Are Living in the Era of Job Gentrification

    Employers increasingly want Ivy League grads for minor-league jobs.

    Apparently a crap economy causing overqualified graduates to take the jobs at the local Starbucks is now a form of gentrification.

    The answer to the problem is of course not economic growth but guilt on the part of overqualified people reduced to taking a crap job.

    1. MORE PEOPLE NEED TO GO TO COLLEGE!!

  27. Way back in 1998, my mom took my brother and me to see Saving Private Ryan. She thought it would scare us out of joining the Army. So much for that.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82RTzi5Vt7w

    1. I cannot watch the last battle scene in that movie. The one dude getting slowwwwwwly stabbed to death, the ieutenant getting killed….blah…

      1. War is hell, and actual combat is a real motherfucker.

        My brother has a gore file from his time as a medevac pilot. I wonder why keeps pictures of stuff like that. Maybe reliving the horror makes it easier to deal with.

        1. Like all the medics at the front gate of BAF when I was there…has to be a coping mechanism.

          I don’t watch war movies anymore…

    2. I read a story about a Marine lieutenant at Iwo Jima. He was at the front of the landing craft. When the ramp dropped, he let out a heroic “FOLLOW MEEEEE!”, took a step forward, then tripped and fell into the sand. It’s a good thing he fell, because right after a burst of machine gun fire killed all the guys standing right behind him.

    3. One of my grandfathers was in the Airborne during the Second World War. One day, this grandfather of mine told me that 15 minutes after he landed in France his best friend got his head blown off by a German rifleman. My grandfather and his best friend were right next to each other when it happened.

      I heard this story long after I had decided to not join the Army.

      The Army fucking my grandfather and my uncles (Vietnam-era veterans) out of their veteran’s benefits and my unwillingness to fight Bill Clinton’s wars caused me to make the decision to not go into the military.

    4. well she’s right you shouldn’t join the army but not because of movies.

  28. Yeah, I’m not really into seeing any photos of dead toddlers washed up on shore today.

    1. You want to see something truly horrific, Tony and Dumfy are both in the Kentucky Clerk thread.

      1. Is there any way to wall off the thread, like the Cask of Amontillado?

        1. …one doesn’t get many Poe references over the course of the day.

          +1

        2. Yes, but we have to get everybody drunk first.

          1. Has a sober person ever posted to this forum?

            1. Has a sober person ever posted to this forum?

              I’m an Irishman who spent my college years in Wisconsin. Up there the breast milk is 7% alcohol.

              1. Bullshit!

                Real sconnies don’t have time for regular booze. That tit milk is 7% paint thinner.

                Ask Tundra, he’s a true Minnesodan and will back me up on this.

            2. *snaps awake, with key board imprint on face*

              Hic*

              What uh…what were we talking about?

          2. OK – we were good to go right from Jump Street! BRICK ‘ER UP!

        3. This is for science, B.P. Someone has to definitively answer whether sufficiently high concentrations of stupidity can actually cause cancer. This is the only way.

      2. When two trolls go to war….

        /fuckmegoestoTrollywood

        1. Two? We’ve also got John in there Johning up the place, but Michael Hihn wants to make sure that the other side has someone to be embarrassed by as well and started comparing everyone to Nazis, and there’s like six other people I’ve never even seen before spouting their own lunacy. It’s World War Troll.

          1. “World War Troll”

            Oh nicely done! +1

  29. World’s only good Canadian is taking a gender studies class starting in one week, will release a weekly video debunking everything they learn in class.

    I have a good feeling Lauren Southern’s GPA is about to take a hit due to all the F’s an angry feminist is about to give her.

    1. Hopefully she’s going in disguise, with a pseudonym.

      1. Check around 35s in the video… pretty convincing.

    2. Poor strategy. Never let the enemy know your battle plans ahead of time.

      1. You leave my future wife alone.

        1. He’s right. On the other hand, her opponents are stupid.

    3. ‘World’s only good Canadian’

      DONT DO IT SHATNER, THE FEMINST HAS A STICK!!!

  30. I have seen these stories about Syrian refugees struggling to get into Europe via Hungary…

    …and not one of them seems to mention, = why is it they don’t want to just stop and find work in Bulgaria, Macedonia, Romania?

    Its not like “Europe” (or Canada) are somehow magically the most convenient locations for refugees…?

    1. To be fair, those three countries are exporting their own people because their economy is shit. Of course, they’ve been mostly exporting to Western Europe, where Syrians are aiming, too. Who’s gonna hire a Syrian who doesn’t speak local language, doesn’t know local customs and might not even drink?
      Also, if they get refugee accommodation there, it won’t be as nice and generous as West Europe.

    2. Or Hungary for that matter.

      I live in Europe and I don’t know either. It is true that the Northern countries are flooded with Polish and Bulgarian folks who are willing to take any service job in the UK or Germany (and are quite good workers too). So I guess their economies must be in crap shape. It’s unclear to me why, with the free flow of people and goods, they wouldn’t all be booming due to cheaper labor.

      1. Protectionism and racism, most likely.

        Wow, where else are people leaning in that direction? hmmmm, can’t think of it at the moment.

      2. Seriously, what can Syrians do in any of those countries? Even if they speak a foreign language, it won’t be Hungarian, Bulgarian, etc, so any qualifications they have are wasted. There’s already tons of low cost labour in those countries, and, as far as black markets go, they are covered as well. The countries themselves are smaller, poorer and have far less culturally for Syrians than UK, France or Germany.

        1. “The countries themselves are smaller, poorer and have far less culturally for Syrians

          Maybe. I’m not sure i buy that.

          Particularly when a lot (if not most) of these places are still better off than Syria itself.

          They’re certainly less economically advantaged than Europe proper, but Bosnia, Croatia have muslim populations and decent economies which I’d think might be attractive to syrian emigres

    3. They get free stuff from the German government because of their Nazi past guilt.

    4. why is it they don’t want to just stop and find work in Bulgaria, Macedonia, Romania?

      Two words–welfare benefits. Most of them are trying to get to Germany because it has some of the most generous benefits for migrants in Europe.

      Bulgarians, Macedonians, and Romanians also have rather long memories of being invaded and occupied by Muslims for several hundred years and aren’t exactly eager to risk history repeating itself.

    1. That is….”delicious”….on so many levels

    2. Tojo tried to commit suicide by shooting himself in the heart. He was saved by American medics and blood donated by Americans. The Japanese thought it was shameful that he did not commit suicide the proper way (seppuku).

      1. Confucius say: Tojo not have the right Mojo

  31. A new study shows that, at least in Los Angeles County, there’s very little correlation between the eating habits of individuals and their proximity to fast food restaurants or grocery stores, throwing the concept of “food deserts” into further question.

    Our stupid Minneapolis has been going on and on about “food deserts” in Minneapolis. It is total bullshit.

    1. It is an excuse to regulate, and that’s all the bullshit they need.

      1. That’s true. They want to force stores to stock what they tell them even though no one will buy it.

    2. Minneapolis Mayor

    3. The central downtown area was pretty bad for food. They tax you like 14% on drinks too.

      1. Gotta pay for Block E dude. That 14% includes a special tax that went to the bars and tenants of the Block E mall. The owner of the old Pickled Parrot bar was so miffed he closed his downtown location.

        Block E was a block of bars and other seedy places that was pretty popular, but the city council wanted a fancy development there, so the razed all the bars. Then the block sat empty for years as they tried to figure out which crony would get the development rights.

        It finally opened again with an urban mall. Then no one would go there. The biggest problem (in my opinion) was that in an attempt to make it palatable to the proggies, they mandated that the mall have an open space in front of it for the people. The people who tended to congregate there were pretty much crack dealers and their customers.

        So it failed and now they dumped in more millions to convert it into a practice facility for the T-wolves.

        http://tcsidewalks.blogspot.co…..about.html

        But if Block E teaches us anything, it should teach us to be skeptical anytime a developer comes to the city with a plan to “save downtown.” And this is doubly true if the plan involves tearing down existing shops or businesses, no matter how seedy or disreputable you might find them.

  32. ERRYBARDY FOOTROOSE

    – Dancing in Public No Longer Illegal in Japan

      1. You totally missed like a dozen great opportunities there

  33. http://www.mattbevin.com/matt_…..nty_clerks
    Any thoughts on this?

    1. He’s an idiot because government officials don’t have the Constitutional right not to do their job.

    2. Thats one of the stupidest fucking things I’ve ever seen

      People don’t elect citizens to use their “Individual Discretion” to apply law as per their private morals.

      Citizens leave their personal fucking views at home when they take “PUBLIC” office. if they want to flog jesus and be unmolested… Welcome back to the private sector.

      1. I’m guessing you didn’t hit the ‘Donate’ button?

        1. If he had a tin-cup i’d have pissed in it

    3. MATT BEVIN is running for office? Again? Losing to The Turtle wasn’t enough. There must be more boobing.

  34. Did anyone cover this cop in Texas getting fired for killing an unarmed teen? I heard today, as well, a cop in Massachusetts lost his job for fabricating a story (I forget which town – Millett? Something like that).

    http://www.cnn.com/2015/08/11/…..-shooting/

      1. THAT’S IT!

        /Lucy yells at Schroeder.

    1. Libertarian Moment? In all seriousness, maybe the increased awareness and talk of po-po problems is pressuring departments to do something meaningful.

  35. Three corrections officers in Santa Clarita, California, have been arrested and charged with beating an inmate to death last week in a county jail.

    I blame out of control War on Copz rhetoric.

  36. The father was the only survivor of the family’s attempt to flee to Canada.

    OK, normally I’m all sympathetic to the plight immigrants – legal or otherwise – but seriously, *fleeing* Canada? I mean, I know Canada has waaaaaaay too much flannel and Australia has all that good chocolate, but really? Really?

        1. Ah, I see – I didn’t RTWFA and what I read suggested that they were in Canada, asylum was denied.

          But still – Greece, even Turkey, are decent places and a lot easier for a Syrian to get los tin the crowd in than Canada.

  37. Millenial Polling Shows = They Hate Themselves and Think Their Own Opinions Are Stupid

    Want to Be “Gen X”, But Gen X Thinks They Suck Already

    “WASHINGTON ? Even millennials don’t think much of their generation.

    A Pew study released Thursday shows 59 percent of millennials described their generation as “self-absorbed.” Almost half ? or 49 percent ? said they were “wasteful,” and 43 percent said they were “greedy.”

    The highest-ranking positive traits they came up with were “environmentally conscious” at 40 percent and “idealistic” at 39 percent.

    Many millennials ? generally defined as being ages 18-34 ? don’t even want to be identified as such.

    Sixty percent don’t consider themselves to be part of the “millennial generation.” Instead, 33 percent say they are part of Generation X.”

    1. The highest-ranking positive traits they came up with were “environmentally conscious” at 40 percent and “idealistic” at 39 percent.

      So the only positive traits they came up with are basically synonyms for ‘retarded.’

      1. Just because the author of the article labeled those traits as positive, doesn’t mean you have to.

        1. Most of my generation will describe those as positive and everyone who describes themselves that way will.

          1. You’re canadian, you don’t count.

  38. A judge has vacated the four-game suspension lodged against Patriots quarterback Tom Brady in that whole “deflategate” scandal with the underinflated footballs.

    Can anyone explain to me why a government official stuck his nose in this? Why does the clogged court even entertain the nuances of a private game?

    Biffy keeps nudging the croguet balls closer to together. Someone call the cops!

    1. It’s a contract dispute, the Federal courts decide them. The NFL actually filed to “confirm their decision.” NFLPA won based on terms of CBA not followed.

      1. There’s no way NFL could not know they would lose. NFL must’ve spent nearly 3 minutes of revenue on this. NFLPA “wins” the suit but loses the PR battle, which is the exact outcome Goodell wanted.

        1. I don’t see how the NFL won a PR battle with this.

    2. Don’t like Brady (because he isn’t quarterbacking MY team) but the suspension was stupid.
      As I recall, before every play an NFL official handles the ball and spots it. If they can’t detect an under-inflated football, then they aren’t doing their job. Same as if they miss 12 men on the field – it’s their bad, not the sideline coach who couldn’t count properly.

  39. “You see this Death Row cell, Dylan? It will be your home for the next thirty years of your life!”

  40. Kugman = “In policy terms, climate action ? if it happens at all ? will probably look like health reform. “

    Well, *that’s* a relief.

  41. http://www.bostonglobe.com/met…..story.html

    Millis gun attack story fabricated, official says

    Protect and serve, bitches.

    1. Nope, no militarized police there.

  42. I remember a while back Shikhia wrote a column declaring that Hillary was a genius for embracing amnesty. Everyone laughed at her, including me. Time to eat crow: she was right, as usual. There is nothing to be gained from pandering to the border nazis. These people will not accept anything less than DERPORT EVERY1 NOW so you may as well bomb the bridge. Whomever comes out of the GOP bloodbath will have been ‘forced’ by the Trumpsters to say some pretty stupid stuff about immigration, and they won’t be able to walk it back all the way without alienating the Trumpster, which will alienate normal people. Normal people say they like border security, but it’s easy to scare those normal people into believing the GOP guy is racist based on his dumb immigration comments. The average person hates the idea that they might be racist more than they like border security. Look at what happened to the CA GOP after they started enforcing Prop #? (the one about not providing services to illegals). Hillary will have that file nailed down, assuming she survives email-gate and maybe assuming she isn’t up against Fiorina.

    1. I think that’s complete nonsense because far fewer people are in favor of more immigration than against immigration. The people who ‘favor’ more immigration are never going to vote Republican anyway, so it can’t possibly hurt a Republican candidate.

      1. First, you missed my point. Voters say that, but the feeling of not being a racist will outweigh that, I think. Second, Gallup clearly indicates that Americans favor amnesty, so it’s not clear-cut regarding immigration.

        1. Voters say that, but the feeling of not being a racist will outweigh that, I think.

          Yeah, all the way up until they move to another school district.

    2. Speaking of Hillary, since we’re locking up elected officials for breaking laws, when is she going to jail for possessing and transmitting highly classified signals intelligence data through unapproved systems, breaking numerous federal laws in the process?

  43. Are any of our Canadian contingent in the Maritime provinces? I’ll be passing through some of the Maritime provinces in the near future. Sorry, I don’t want to announce exact dates on a public forum for reasons I hope I don’t have to explain. If you are, and are interested in getting a beer, contact me at dgroves140 at gmail dot com.

    Sarcasmic or any other Mainers out there, I’ll be passing your area on the way home and able to meet folks on the way home. If you’re interested, drop me an e-mail and I’ll let you know when I’ll pass through.

  44. Donald Trump has signed the Republican National Committee’s “loyalty pledge” not to run as a third-party candidate if promise that makes sure he doesn’t get the nomination and won’t run as an independent

  45. Sounds like a plan to me dude. Wow.

    http://www.Total-Privacy.tk

  46. Note that all of the “false” things about Obamacare are more or less true.

    And I love the leftist meme of “Fox News creates manufactured outrage.” Because leftists never, ever “manufacture outrage.”

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