A.M. Links: Hillary Staffer Subpoenaed Over Private Email Server, Kentucky Clerk Faces Contempt Charges for Refusing to License Gay Marriages, O'Malley Plans Protest Outside DNC


  • Credit: Downing Street / Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND

    Bryan Pagliano, a State Department staffer who worked on Hillary Clinton's private email server, has been subpoenaed by Congress and plans to invoke the Fifth Amendment.

  • Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis is scheduled to appear in federal court today where she faces contempt charges for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.
  • Democratic presidential hopeful Martin O'Malley is planning to hold a protest outside the headquarters of the Democratic National Committee in response to the limited number of presidential debates currently scheduled during the 2016 primaries. "It's important that we bring our call for more debates directly to the group that is restricting candidates' ability to debate," the O'Malley campaign declared in a statement. "It's, frankly, undemocratic."
  • The Republican National Committee is reportedly asking GOP presidential candidates to sign a loyalty pledge promising not to run as independents in 2016.
  • "The family of a Syrian toddler whose body washed up on a Turkish beach had been trying to emigrate to Canada after fleeing the war-torn town of Kobani, one of their relatives told a Canadian newspaper on Thursday."

New at Reason

  • Immigration and the Constitution The Constitution does not delegate to the federal government power over immigration, only over naturalization. By Judge Andrew Napolitano

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  1. Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis is scheduled to appear in federal court today where she faces contempt charges for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

    Where’s your messiah now, Flanders?

    1. I ask again, if we are going to do this to government employees who dont do their job, why start with her?

      Why not start at the top?

      1. low-hanging fruit. And the feelz.

      2. Because she’s refusing for ideological reasons, not just because she’s lazy, incompetent or feels entitled.

        1. Same applies to the guy at the top.

          1. No see, he feels entitled too, so its okay.

          2. But his ideological reason the good ones, while she is clearly teh evulz

          3. I’m not convinced that Obama has an ideological bone in his body.

        2. My California baby-mom and only love has stopped pestering me about getting married. She’s very conservative and this marriage thingy seems so sordid now.

      3. I actually prefer gov’t employees who don’t do their job. It’s the ones who go above and beyond who scare me the most.

        1. In most cases, I agree. The Ron Swanson theory of government. But a few government employees do provide services that people need. Of course many of those services would be better handled outside of government, but here we are. At the moment you can’t get (legally) married, buy and drive a car, etc. without some government employee doing their job.

        2. Will Rogers said, “Thank God we don’t get all the government we pay for.”

    2. Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis

      Just another Rethuglikkan religious fanatic…oh wait…

      1. Yeah, but why isn’t she withholding CWPs since guns kill people and murder is prohibited by the Ten Commandments?

        1. If she truly is Christian, why is she soldiering for Caesar?

    3. Hello.

      “Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis is scheduled to appear in federal court today where she faces contempt charges for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.”

      She may have to cut her losses I’m afraid. Church and State and all that.

      1. In her place, if I was willing to blow up my cushy government job over religion and gayz, I’d aim for a little jail time – just a day or two to get the martrydom fizz about you. Then resign, in tears and in front of cameras – gofund a book, have one of the millions of starving writers write if for you and get that sucker out for Christmas sales.

        Now for the title?
        ‘The Cross of Gayz’

        1. And for that, I give the *cross of narrowed gaze*

    4. So this is the second Reason article in 3 days to say that she is in trouble for not issuing licenses to same-sex couples. But I was assured by many commenters yesterday that she’s actually refusing to issue any licenses at all. Does anyone know exactly which it is?

      1. She is issuing no licenses because she refuses to issue same sex. She thinks shutting down the office protects her from charges of discrimination.

        1. Maybe she’s a crypto-anarchist looking to bring down the State from within the highest echelons of some Kentucky county bureaucracy.

          1. That prospect excites me.

      2. It’s a Reuters article.

        I’m pretty sure she is refusing to do any marriage licenses.

        Whatever happened to resigning in protest? I guess it’s an elected position, so they just can’t fire her.

        1. My wag- if she resigns, then the gays will get their licenses so it’s the same as issuing them herself. As long as she stays and refuses, no licenses for gays.

          1. And if she refuses to grant licenses, they will go somewhere else and get married, so the effect is the same.

            1. “Not on my watch, not from my office, not in my county!”

    5. Her boss could defuse this entire cluster duck by re-assigning her to a different job. That’s how this is handled by competent managers.

      1. Her boss is the voters and they may not have a problem with what she’s doing. Issuing no licenses at all means not only can the gays not get married but neither can inter-racial couples nor non-Baptist couples nor Republican couples.

        They’re not much different than the people in my little part of the world who are pissed off about the outsiders coming in here and stirring up trouble about the way we do things around here. Perhaps totally unrelatedly, the couple of people in my life who have kids who go to this school are also the same people in my life who think Donald Trump is just the greatest thing since sliced bread and plan on voting for him just as soon as they find out which party he belongs to. (“Which one is Obama? He’s in the other one, right?” ACTUAL FUCKING QUOTE.)

        1. I have a few very intelligent friends who are fans of Trump. I cannot for the life of me understand why.

          I get the entertainment factor. I get the sheer joy of watching someone throw hand grenades in random directions, particularly in the vapid world of national politics.

          But as a serious consideration? I just don’t get it. It is like saying you want to vote for Yosemite Sam.

          1. you want to vote for Yosemite Sam.

            I would.

            1. Yosemite Sam would be way better of a president than anyone else who’s running.

              1. “I’ll get rid of all the varmits!!!” *pulls six shooters and shoots in air(that’s where Biden got it from…)

            2. At last, a Cowboy we can all get behind!

            3. You want W again?

          2. “Well I speak LOUDLY and carry a BIGGER stick! And I use it too!”

            *bonks Bugs Bunny over the head*

      2. She’s elected. Her “boss” is the electorate. So yes, an incompetent boss.

      3. That’s how this is handled by competent managers.

        And government is just full of competent managers.

        Also, as others pointed out, it’s an elected office, so she couldn’t just be reassigned.

  2. Taylor Swift Is Dreaming Of A Very White Africa

    The video for American singer Taylor Swift’s new song “Wildest Dreams” has been viewed more than 10 million times in the two days since it debuted.

    In it, we see two beautiful white people falling in love while surrounded by vast expanses of beautiful African landscapes and beautiful animals ? a lion, a giraffe, a zebra.

    Taylor Swift is dressed as a colonial-era woman on African soil. With just a few exceptions, the cast in the video ? the actors playing her boyfriend and a movie director and his staff ? all appear to be white.

    We are shocked to think that in 2015, Taylor Swift, her record label and her video production group would think it was OK to film a video that presents a glamorous version of the white colonial fantasy of Africa.

    1. You white people walk too proud upon this earth.

      1. That’s because we’re all living in America.


    2. Sometimes I wonder if its bullshit like this that will end up tearing the country apart instead of the coming economic apocalypse.

      1. I just finished a book in which the extinction of humanity by an astronomic event was very nearly preempted by ginned-up grievance politics.

        1. I didn’t know Al Gore had a new book out.

          1. Yep. The last half of part two was infuriating.

            1. I liked it overall – got a tad weary of the crypto-Neil Tyson character and wanted more “5000 years later” – but thought it a worthy book.

    3. Anyone who thought we were reaching peak outrage is an idiot. That’s a supply we can create out of nothing.

      1. Virtual particle outrage.


    5. my god, how exhausting it must be to live inside the perpetual outrage machine.

      1. I think they drink a lot of coffee.

        1. Ahem, * fair trade,* of course.

          1. Fair Trade, Organic, Rainforest Alliance Certified, Sustainable Non-GMO coffee.

            1. And what’s the gluten content? How many glutens? I’m only allowed to eat like 3 glutens.

              1. That’s just the beans. Then there’s the method of brewing. Don’t forget the living wages for the barrista in a microaggression free work environment. No staring while they make the coffee!

                1. No staring while they make the coffee!

                  Good luck with that…

                  1. Hmm. Seems like you might run afoul of some health codes there.

      1. Forget it HM, it’s NPRtown.

    6. Colonialism was neither romantic nor beautiful. It was exploitative and brutal.

      Were Uganda / Zimbabwe / Congo / etc. more exploitative and brutal then than they are now?

      1. Robert Mugabe doesn’t like the tone of your question.

        1. Only in NRPworld are there no comparatives. The world only comes in better and worse.

          1. Heart of Derpness. (posted again because it showed up in this thread about thirty comments below, where it makes no “sense”)

      2. It was probably romantic and beautiful for many of the rich white colonists involved.

        Congo (Belgian congo anyway) was probably worse in the colonial era.

        1. The British left their colonies in Africa better off than they were pre colonialism.

          Btw, just saw “White Hunter, Black Heart. Great Clint Eastwood movie loosely based on John Huston’s time in Africa shooting animals instead of filming.

          1. I think that is probably true. But it doesn’t excuse the racism and violence of colonialism. The British were there to extract resources.

            1. Is there any difference between colonial racism and violence and every day, run-of-the-mill racism and violence?

              1. Or the racism and violence of the pre-colonial eras?

            2. And the Africans didn’t have the wherewithal to extract it, this sort of economic and power imbalance would have had similar results if almost any other group were in the same position as the Europeans. But the Europeans were rather ethical as far as murdering foreign invaders go.

              The Arabs and Ottomans did a shit ton of colonizing and a shit ton more enslavement and they were far far far more brutal slavers and tyrants. There’s a reason you don’t see any populations in the Middle East descended from their abundant African slave population. The men were castrated, the women who were pregnant had their babies killed and when the slave became a sickly burden, they were put down like a diseased farm animal. The Europeans by comparison had a governing philosophy and ethical code that was unquestionably superior to that of the Middle Eastern societies, which were the alternative.

              1. The Europeans were rather ethical in comparison to others with the glaring exception of the Belgians. They were truly evil fuckers.

                1. As any Dutchman will attest.

              2. Yeah, sure. Europeans, especially the British, were probably the least worst colonizers they could have had. That doesn’t mean you have to excuse what they did. I’m not making any claim that Africa would be a more prosperous and civilized place if European colonialism hadn’t happened.

                1. That doesn’t mean you have to excuse what they did.

                  I excused what they did? I just pointed out that European colonialism was the least bad alternative of many bad alternatives for a society as far behind the technological and social curve as the sub-Saharan Africans. “Teach men not to rape Teach more advanced civilizations not colonize the less advanced” just isn’t a reasonable view of history.

                2. “Yeah, sure. Europeans, especially the British, were probably the least worst colonizers they could have had. That doesn’t mean you have to excuse what they did.”

                  ^ This.

            3. If you can’t have slaves in your own country just move to another country and enslave the locals. Problem solved.

        2. Colonialism was the best thing to ever happen to the Dark Continent.

      3. Colonialism was neither romantic nor beautiful. It was exploitative and brutal.

        Of course, Taylor Swift isn’t actually making a video about actual colonial Africa, she’s using a 50’s aesthetic based on African romance movies of that era.

        This would be like complaining if someone did a music video based on small town 1950’s nostalgia on the grounds that someone in Alabama might have been getting lynched at the time.

        1. Heh, more than using an aesthetic, notice that about the first thing shown in the video is a clapperboard with the date 8-2-1950.

          1. 1950 wasn’t exactly the heyday of European colonial rule or totalitarianism in Africa.

            1. Not sure of your point — if you were shooting a movie on location in 1950, what do you figure the general makeup of the cast and crew would’ve been?

              1. The point is that using such a time period necessarily disqualifies the notion that this is a celebration of colonialism.

              2. Not sure of your point — if you were shooting a movie on location in 1950, what do you figure the general makeup of the cast and crew would’ve been?

                They’d have been white.

                The porters and guides would have been black.

      4. Of course, they lived under the constant tyranny and oppression of those sensible, and enlightened Europeans we soo wish to emulate…

      5. Heart of Derpness.

        1. Fucked up nesting. See above.

    7. Song sucks but that’s a good look for her. Yeah, there seems to be an infinite supply of derp. Who even thinks like that? Other than that crazy asshole who shot down the reporter and cameraman.

      1. I actually think she looks better without the China Doll makeup she typically sports.


    8. My contribution to the absurd idea of cultural misappropriation:
      How it feels when white people shame your culture’s food ? then make it trendy
      My family’s food went from ‘Chinese grossness’ to America’s ‘hottest food trend.’

      Recently, I discovered I can order bone broth, like my grandmother used to make, in New York City ? the same way I would order a cold-pressed juice.

      The horror!

      Fashionable food from foreign cultures may satisfy a temporary hunger, but if you’re trying it for shallow reasons, you’ll be culturally unfulfilled in the long run.

      Apparently one should feel shame for trying something new without a deep understanding and respect for the cultural evolution of the food one is eating.

      1. Yea, because no one else ate bone broth except the Chinese.

        1. Yeah, cultural appropriation is retarded but it’s retarded on steroids when it comes to talking about food.

          1. I hope she remembers this next time she eats fried chicken.

            1. Or pasta alla putanesca.

      2. Taking it to its extremes, only Mexicans should be allowed to eat chocolate.

        1. I actually read something by some lefty recently that argued that same ridiculous point in regards to avocados and Mexicans.

          1. But I LOVE eating Mexicans!

            1. They can eat all the testicles that they want.

      3. Funny how that cultural appropriation outrage only seems to work one way – where’s the outrage about the bastards appropriating my culture’s printing press and electricity and the Cheeto?

      4. Then I am keeping all the fucking haggis!

        Seriously though, I think the Japanese need to stop fucking around with distilling “Scotch” whisky.

    9. Oh, LOL this entire paragraph is hilarious:

      We are shocked to think that in 2015, Taylor Swift, her record label and her video production group would think it was OK to film a video that presents a glamorous version of the white colonial fantasy of Africa. Of course, this is not the first time that white people have romanticized colonialism: See Louis Vuitton’s 2014 campaign, Ernest Hemingway’s Snows of Kilimanjaro, the 1962 film Lawrence of Arabia and of course Karen Blixen’s memoir Out of Africa.

      WHAT! How do Snows of Kilimanjaro or Lawrence of Arabia romanticize colonialism? Snows of Kilimanjaro is about a dude who develops gangrene in his leg and dies. Lawrence of Arabia is about fighting against the colonialist power, the Ottoman Empire. Did these people actually read or watch the works they’re talking about?

      1. I think for these people, “romanticize” means a white character grows in some way. Sure, Lawrence was fighting against a colonial power, but that reduces colonialism to an excursion for a white man to develop his skills and his ego, or some bullshit.

      2. Valuing facts over feelings? You’re privilege is showing.

    10. We are shocked to think that in 2015

      IT’S 2015

    11. Out of Africa (1985):

      Best Picture
      Sydney Pollack

      Best Director
      Sydney Pollack
      Best Writing, Screenplay Based on Material from Another Medium
      Kurt Luedtke

      Best Cinematography
      David Watkin

      Best Art Direction-Set Decoration
      Stephen B. Grimes
      Josie MacAvin

      Best Sound
      Chris Jenkins
      Gary Alexander
      Larry Stensvold
      Peter Handford

      Best Music, Original Score
      John Barry

      Oscar Best Actress in a Leading Role
      Meryl Streep

      Best Actor in a Supporting Role
      Klaus Maria Brandauer

      Best Costume Design
      Milena Canonero

      Best Film Editing
      Fredric Steinkamp
      William Steinkamp
      Pembroke J. Herring
      Sheldon Kahn

      What a difference 30 years makes.

  3. The Republican National Committee is reportedly asking GOP presidential candidates to sign a loyalty pledge promising not to run as independents in 2016.

    Party Uber Alles

    1. You know who else wanted loyalty to the Party?

      1. Beastie Boys?

        1. +1 Brass Monkey

        2. Gotta fight for your right

          1. George Lincoln Rockwell?

      2. Hillary Clinton?

      3. Eddie Murphy?

      4. This Bad Mother F*cker?

        Trigger Warning – NSFW, possibly NSFL depending on how you may feel about learning that there are apparently Canadian white-boy rappers out there.

    2. More importantly, have any of them signed a ‘Purity Pledge’?

      1. “I want my Daddy to take me to prom!”

      2. Is that the one where they promise to only fuck over US Citizens?

      3. Sworn to fun, loyal to none.

    3. Almost overnight the Glorious Loyalty Oath Crusade was in full flower.

    4. They already make you sign a loyalty pledge when you join the party. How is this any different?

  4. Democratic presidential hopeful Martin O’Malley is planning to hold a protest outside the headquarters of the Democratic National Committee…

    Learned from the BLM movement he helped create.

    1. Martin O’Malley:All lives matter.
      Prog crowd: Boo! Hiss! Racist!
      Subliminal Martin O’Malley : oK. Which ones don’t matter. Describe your bigotry.

    2. I did one of those compare your views to the candidates things. Paul was first by a large spread at 91%. O’Malley was dead last at 13%.

    3. Anybody else here remember a time when it was rare for presidential candidates to debate each other? It’s so taken for granted now, yet it wasn’t always considered a necessity.

      Apparently the DNC considers them such a necessity now that, in order to make sure there’s sufficient att’n to them, they had to create an official, closed circuit of them, such that if you participate in an unsanctioned one, you don’t get invited to the sanctioned ones. O’Malley’s complaining that there should be more allowed.

  5. Starfish-killing robot close to trials on Great Barrier Reef

    Crown-of-thorns starfish have have been described as a significant threat to coral.

    The Cotsbot robot, which has a vision system, is designed to seek out starfish and give them a lethal injection.

    After it eradicates the bulk of starfish in a given area, human divers can move in and mop up the survivors.

    1. What could possibly go wrong?

      1. “Is this the reef of Sarah Connor?”

        1. On August 29 2016, Cotsnet became self aware.

        2. “Have you seen this starfish?”

        3. Drop your speargun. You have ten seconds to comply.

      2. If the robot is programmed to only kill creatures with 5 appendages, we should all be safe.

        *counts number of appendages*

        Crap. It was a woman who invented this thing, wasn’t it?

  6. Salmon spawns on Obama in Alaska

    During his historic trip to Alaska, President Barack Obama spent some time fishing at Kanakanak Beach in Dillingham and in a comical moment, a salmon spawned on his shoes.

    “Did you see that? Something got on my shoes,” Obama called to the press. “He was spawning a little bit, which, generally you don’t want fish spawning on your feet.”

    “He was happy to see me,” Obama added.

    Is there anything the man can’t do?

    1. story sounds fishy to me

      1. **narrow gaze***

        /pinch hitting for the Swiss mammal

        1. Appreciate that, Mr. Lizard.

      2. “He was spawning a little bit, which, generally you don’t want fish spawning on your feet.”

        Fish named Chris Matthews.

        1. “I spawned first!”- David Brooks

    2. During his historic trip to Alaska,

      Seriously, it’s “historic”? Much of his trip is no different than someone else going there for vacation.

      1. Yeah. Harding went there 90 years ago. And immediately died upon his return.

      2. Exactly. It’s another fucking vacation in everything but name.

      3. Yeah, but he’s the first sitting President to visit the Arctic Circle. That’s very important because the media have nothing better to talk about.

        1. “..That’s very important because the media have nothing better to other shit they would rather not talk about.”

      4. I know Barry tends to avoid any contact with states that didn’t vote for him, but since when is visiting one of the 50 (57?) states “historic”?

        1. It’s the first time a black President has visited Alaska. Can’t wait to see the memorial plaque they put up, wonder if it will look like the plaque they put up over the White House toilet commemorating the historic first dump ever taken in the White House by a black President. (I know, it’s racist of me to assume that just because he’s black he would take a dump rather than leave one.)

      5. Much of his trip is no different than someone else going there for vacation.

        Bigger entourage

    3. “I once fish jizz thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis big.”

      1. I saw one of tgise Alaskin shows. This eskimo chick pulled freshly caught salmon out of tge net and sucked the roe right from it’s belly. It was funny. Then she sang fish eggs to the tune of fish heads.

    4. Sometimes Obama / Salmon slash-fic just writes itself.

      1. *becomes worried SF is going to write something in this nature*

      2. It should be bigger than the thing that happened to Carter with wild animals.

    5. Wait, what was Chris Matthews doing in the river in Alaska?

    6. Ichthyality?

  7. Pet king cobra on the lam in Orlando:


    Years ago, I knew a guy who had a permit to raise venomous reptiles (which from what I hear is not an easy permit to acquire). At one point, he had in his collection an albino king cobra, which he kept in a glass enclosure. Apparently, the albinism gene also makes them insane in the membrane, and every time he walked into the room where the snake was kept, it would begin striking at him from inside the enclosure until venom was running down the glass. That’s the stuff of nightmares right there.

    1. Last time I went to NERD they had a couple cobras.


      1. Last time I went to NERD they had a couple cobras.

        At the time I knew that guy, he had a juvenile gaboon viper, probably about two feet long. One day, he asked me to buy a couple feeder mice and bring them to his house to watch him feed this thing. As it was explained to me, the injection of the venom not only immobilizes the prey, but it’s also the first part of the digestive process. Watching blood pour out the mouse’s nose, mouth, eyes, and ears, there was little doubt that its insides were being dissolved.

        1. Ewwwwwwww

          /teenage girl

          Seriously though, can you imagine what would happen if you were bit in the leg or arm? You’d lose the limb for sure.

          1. Seriously though, can you imagine what would happen if you were bit in the leg or arm? You’d lose the limb for sure.

            Yeah, I’ve seen pictures of people bitten on the leg or hand by one of these things. Left untreated, the limb basically rots down to the bone. Really and truly awful. Even with prompt treatment, you’re not assured of surviving, let alone not losing large amounts of tissue.

            Last year, the wife of a coworker was bitten on the hand by a pygmy rattlesnake while gardening. These aren’t nearly as deadly as a gaboon viper, and she did receive prompt treatment and eventually made a full recovery, but for a couple months, she was barely able to use that hand at all.

    2. Bah, a gang of pythons will beat that cobra up in no time.

        1. If I was one of those drivers going by, those things will be pancakes.

        2. That was FANTASTIC! I think the python was winning.

          1. Did you see the size of that cobra? Had to have been at least twenty feet long. And they eat other snakes. Any snake with “king” in its name eats other snakes. King cobra, king snake, etc. I thought it was cool that the python had the sense to immobilize the cobra’s head. And I think you’re right. Eventually the cobra would have been strangled or asphyxiated.

            1. I think they commonly grow to nearly twenty feet in length. What’s more, they can rear up a full third of their body. So imagine being a 6′ tall man and looking one of these things in the eye . . .

            2. Jim Morrison approves.

          2. I bet that’s the last time that cobra picks on a retic.

      1. Loving the thought of holding open that shopping bag with my hands and arms exposed.

    3. Since albino animals can’t hide in the wild, the co-morbidity with the hyperaggression is probably a key reason the genes stuck around (on top of being recessive)

      1. Salon could work some SJW into that theory.

      2. That’s how he explained it to me. Ordinarily, an animal like that wouldn’t survive in the wild past its infancy.

        1. I catch pictures of albino animals in the wild on the Daily Fail from time to time. Last one was an albino whale. Humpback if I remember correctly.

            1. Neat!

              You’re right, that’s really cool. Whales are beautiful animals.

          1. Humpback

            So, anal?

  8. Hundreds of girls hospitalized due to mysterious gas at school in Afghanistan

    Kabul, Afghanistan (CNN)Mysterious fumes in two Afghan schools have sent more than 300 girls to a hospital this week — and officials suspect the incidents were deliberate.

    On Thursday, 115 girls from a school in Herat city were hospitalized after they were poisoned with some type of gas, Herat Regional Hospital spokesman Mohammad Rafiq Sherzai said.

    The schoolgirls ranged in age from between 9 and 18, he said.

    Sherzai said this is the third incident of its kind this week in the same police district of Herat.

    You know who else gassed school kids…

    1. Clutzy Russian anti-terrorist troops?

    2. Nasty shit.

      But hey. Obama tells us Christians…Crusades….

      1. Afghanistan might be the worst place in the world. Just for some perspective, the Pashtun have been engaging in pedophile rape of little boys for generations and justify it under Islam by arguing that it’s totally not gay so long as you don’t actually love the boy. When the Taliban took over, they cracked down on the pedophilia by basically murdering people who engaged in it. So when we ousted the Taliban all the pedophilia issues in the Pashtun parts of the country came back because the Taliban was no longer there to kill the child rapists.

        The Taliban actually originally gained support because they’d come in and rescue boys who had been kidnapped and raped by militia commanders.

        So poisoning some girls with toxic fumes is probably like the 50th worst thing that happened in Afghanistan this week.

        1. Good god is the middle east fucked up.

          1. Trust me, all they is a little democracy.

            -Bill Kristol

        2. Tough call on the worst place in the world. I think it comes down to Afghanistan, Mauritania or North Korea.

          1. Syria and northern Iraq gets get a pass?

            1. Too new and dynamic to say. They are certainly getting there, but I think there is reason to exclude active war zones.

            2. Can we all just agree that the entire Middle East is terrible?

    3. The fat kid in the back of the class?

      1. Pull my +1 finger

        1. “Oh Allah, I should have stayed out of the snackbar.”

    4. My college roommate?

  9. Emanuel set to call for largest property tax hike in modern Chicago history

    Mayor Rahm Emanuel is set to call for the largest property tax increase in modern Chicago history to raise enough money to make a major pension payment for police and firefighters next year, the mayor’s City Council floor leader and a City Hall source told the Chicago Tribune late Wednesday.

    The mayor also plans to push a new garbage collection tax, a new per-ride fee on taxis and ride-hailing services such as Uber and a new tax on electronic cigarettes and smokeless tobacco products.

    Ald. Patrick O’Connor, 40th, said the idea is to cut down on the annual budget hole that has plagued the city budget for years and further scale back some of the poor financial practices.

    1. scale back some of the poor financial practices

      So, just to be clear, many of the poor financial practices will be left untouched and those poor financial practices to be addressed will only be scaled back not eliminated.

      1. The “poor financial practices” he’s referring to are “not raising taxes”. They are going to scale back that particular poor financial practice by instituting a mere whopping tax increase rather than the mind-bogglingly insane tax increase they really need.

    2. No. Fuck you, cut spending.

      P.S. Will there be a tax on Nikki’s worstness?

    3. So in other words, the amount of money you’re forced to pay to the city for permission to remain in your own home has just increased so that city workers can have a fatter pension.

      1. But rest assured these poor financial practices will only continue to get worse.

        1. They are ending the poor financial practice of not extracting enough money from their victims at gunpoint.

          1. They are ending the poor financial practice of not extracting enough money from their victims at gunpoint

            It really does represent an appalling level of ineptitude. When you have the guns and the jails, there’s simply no excuse for not extracting all the wealth you need, right from the outset, to cover all your expenses and pay all your salaries and retirements.

            1. But if they try to get it all right from the outset, the marks will flee en masse. That’s why they have to do it gradually, lest the parasites drain the host too rapidly.

              1. Ah, the “boiled frog effect.” You’re right, i failed ot consider that. Soak ’em for everything they’ve got, just be sure to turn up the heat gradually.

    4. Let the Detroitification continue.

      I can’t help but feel schadenfreude at Chicago because of how many obnoxious white people I’ve met who talk about how great Chicago is as if the south side doesn’t exist and the police there don’t routinely kidnap people and take them to secret locations.

      1. South Side? Yeah, they will kill you – but on the West Side, they will kill you and do shit to your body after you are dead.

        /paraphrasing DoC parole officer, mid 1990s

    5. How come this never works in SimCity?

  10. …has been subpoenaed by Congress and plans to invoke the Fifth Amendment.

    Ladies and gentlemen, we have our fall guy.

      1. TEATHUGLIKKKANZ!!!1!!!1111!!!!

    1. Maybe, except he was a government employee at the time. He’ll be granted immunity and compelled to testify. Maybe Clinton’s people have a gun on his family and he’ll do the time.

    2. Ladies and gentlemen, we have our fall guy.

      I wonder if they cut some sort of deal with him, or if they just singled him out to be their sacrificial lamb . . .

      1. He’s one of the little people. Sacrificial lamb for sure.

    3. Am I the only creature in this forum that thinks the IT guy should be the first asshole pulled up to the table during any email scandal?

      1. No. Most of them would start their testimony with:

        “You won’t believe how fucked up it really is…”

      2. The guy who knows you spend all day on Ashley Madison talking to bots, and you want him to testify first?

        1. That is exactly what I am saying. The ones doing the digging should put him up first. It gets you to the 5th Ammendment stage faster.

    4. Crazy prediction: FBI will drop the case without much explanation.

      Lefty pundits will rush forward to say “nothing here, move along”. Bump up in polls long enough to win the nomination. Presidential coronation next.

      /hopes he is wrong.

      1. Then, after six months of stonewalling all questions, they will, in unison, respond “That’s old news. Why are we still talking about this?”

      2. No, this is exactly what’s going to happen. Clinton’s profile is way too high and the media far too invested in her ambition the last 20+ years to exert enough pressure that the FBI and DoJ would actually prosecute her for repeatedly sending classified info over nonclassified lines, a practice that would get a normal government employee legitimate jail time.

        Even though her crimes are far worse than Nixon’s because they compromised national security, the media don’t hate Hillary nearly as much as they hated him, and Bernie’s too much of a pussy to call her out on her blatantly illegal activity. So she’s going to end up skating to the general to beat whatever squish the Republican donor class ends up nominating.

      3. The lefty pundits will say, “nothing here, move along. It was just like the fake Benghazi scandal.” As if they had investigated Benghazi at all.

        Don’t get your hopes up over a 5th amendment assertion.

        During the investigations of Clinton’s extensive campaign finance investigation, over 100 witnesses either asserted the 5th or fled the country. It didn’t hurt Clinton’s reputation at all; nobody even remembers it.

        1. Don’t get your hopes up over a 5th amendment assertion

          See also: Lerner, Lois; under PHAKE TEATHUGLIKKKANZ SKANDUL

          1. And speaking of Lerner, it came out last week that she had a separate email account under the name “Toby Miles” (her dog), that everyone neglected to mention to investigators during the two years of investigation.

            Nothing to see here. Move along.

  11. Saw this in the local paper yesterday.

    Disabled man whose home was robbed five times in six years buys a gun to protect himself – then shoots a burglar just hours later… and now the DA is considering whether to charge him for using ‘deadly force’

    Harvey Lembo, 67, bought revolver after being broken into last month
    Disabled former fisherman said he has been robbed five times in six years
    Just hours after collecting weapon he heard someone breaking in again
    When man tried to escape, Mr Lembo says he shot him in the shoulder
    Christopher Wildhaber, 45, is now in jail charged with the burglary


    1. I don’t understand or agree with the state’s logic at all when it comes to defending one’s home. If someone breaks into a person’s house unlawfully then he’s fair game. Plain and simple. They know what they’re doing and moreover how does the homeowner know the intruder doesn’t want more than just some cash or jewelry? What are they supposed to fucken do? Sit there?

      It’s outrageous. This guy did the right thing. Enough of this ‘reasonable force’ bull shit. You come in my house, then I automatically assume you will do harm to my family. Therefore, I have every right as a human to use necessary force I deem appropriate at the time.

      Fuck you.

      1. Not that I disagree with you but, in some jurisdictions, this: When man tried to escape, might be problematic?

        1. When they start convicting the cops for shooting people trying to flee, then I’ll agree.

        2. Know what, Raven?

          Then don’t break the law.

          But I do agree if the person runs away you back off but to me, the law should side with the victim. You have cases where they don’t run away, get shot and SUE the home owner.

          1. Oh, I agree. I was speaking purely from the perspective of the law in this case. In some states, if the perp is exiting your property you are not allowed to use deadly force. See Sarcasmic below also.

            1. Same thing here in Quebec.

        3. All depends who is claiming – explicitly – that the guy really was attempting to escape. Unless I see an exit wound in the front of the perp’s shoulder, I ain’t gonna believe it – and maybe not even then.

          The real ‘crime’ here is that nobody briefed Mr. Lembo beforehand on what to say and showed him how to put a couple of rounds in the center of body mass. Oh, and how to ensure the exit wounds aren’t on the guy’s chest.

      2. I don’t know how this one will pan out. If the guy had shot the intruder in the act of stealing, then it would have been OK. State law says you can shoot someone who is unlawfully on your property and engaging in a crime. However if the person is not committing a crime and your life is not in danger, then you can’t legally use deadly force. At the time that the guy shot the robber, the robber was done stealing and was only trying to get away. I sure hope the DA lets it slide. If not then the guy will likely be threatened with prison for the rest of his life and be coerced into taking a plea. Though if I was in his shoes I’d take it to a jury. Assuming it came to that.

        1. How could the homeowner know for certain he was done stealing? He might have had some of the homeowners goods stuffed in his pocket and was trying to get away with the loot, which is part of stealing.

        2. Yep – he’ll be charged for telling the cops the wrong story and not lawyering up. Not smart.

          He’d be a hero in the local paper if he had said the guy was rushing him.

          1. Trust me, the locals are on his side. That’s why if he’s charged he should demand a jury trial. I have no doubt that he’d be acquitted.

            1. Trust me, the locals are on his side. That’s why if he’s charged he should demand a jury trial. I have no doubt that he’d be acquitted.

              That’s what I’d do. The DA is probably looking for easy pickings, someone he can bully into a plea bargain. My guess is that if he demands a jury trial, the charges will be dropped entirely.

      3. In the US it is unconstitutional to declare any person outside the protection of the law. For good and for ill.

        1. Unless it’s deemed too difficult or dangerous to apprehend you under the law. Yes, you totally have the right to drone process.

          1. I said it was unconstitutional, not that it wasn’t done. Also, its unclear to me whether the Constitution applies outside of Territory claimed by the US. Certainly to the US government’s interactions with Us citizens, and probably to legal residents.

    1. Not just fraud. Looks like it won the election for the other lady, too.

  12. Actor Dean Jones Dies at 84

    Actor Dean Jones, perhaps best known for his acting work in such Disney films as The Love Bug and That Darn Cat, died of Parkinson’s disease Tuesday in Los Angeles. He was 84.

      1. Too soon, Swiss.

  13. Cato Institute Misses the Point on Immigrant Welfare Use ? Again

    Given the complexity of the SIPP and the sensitivity of the issue, we took the extra step of having all of our calculations verified by Decision Demographics, an independent statistical consulting firm that takes no position on immigration.

    So what do open-borders enthusiasts do when confronted with such indisputable data? They change the subject. That’s what the Cato Institute’s Alex Nowrasteh did in his response to our study. While we compare the welfare use of immigrants and natives, he spends several paragraphs on what he calls “the interesting question”, which is how poor immigrants compare to poor natives in terms of welfare use. He gives no reason why this is a more interesting question. It actually obscures the comparison considerably, since poverty is a major driver of welfare use and immigrants are more likely to live in poverty.

    As we make clear in our report, the main reason that immigrants use more welfare than natives is simply that immigrants tend to be less educated and subsequently poorer than natives. Welfare use is not a moral failing on the part of low-skilled immigrants any more than it is for low-skilled natives. Our point is that as long as we continue to take in so many low-skilled immigrants (legal or illegal), immigrant welfare use will remain high.

  14. Kermit the Frog’s new girlfriend is younger, thinner ? and blander

    Let’s make one thing perfectly clear: after the release of pictures of Kermit the Frog’s new girlfriend, Denise, it’s clear who was the real pig on the Muppets.

    Miss Piggy was always the more charismatic performer, the more powerful presence in that relationship: she was Angelina to Kermit’s Billy Bob, the Cher to his Sonny, the Liz to his Larry (Fortensky). And yet he always got the top billing, the most screen time and the most credit for his intelligence. It’s now clear that he was also always colluding with the producers and directors to make sure that Miss Piggy looked like a violent, egotistical harridan and he was seen as the sensitive, Rainbow-Connection-bleating ex-hippie who gracefully put up with both her personality and living in her shadow. Woe is him, we all said ? and that’s exactly what he wanted us to say.

    1. Sounds like he made a nice upgrade.

      1. The K-Man, trading in for a younger model.

    2. Another pig?!? I think Kermit might have issues

      1. They tend to come home safe at night, so…

        1. ***narrows gaze further***

          That’s two for you in one thread, I am keeping my narrow slits on you since Swiss Servitor won’t bother.

          1. Do all us gaijin look alike to you? Just one so far.

            1. Well…yes, but …damnit

              /retracts crest, crawls back in the terrarium.

    3. She is awake that Kermit isn’t a real talking frog, right? He’s just, you know, a cross between a mop and a puppet.

    4. *Looks picture of at the author the article at the top of the page*
      *Looks at the picture of the “Denise” muppet*
      Ho. Ly. Shit!

      1. Whoa. Explains why she’s bitter.

  15. Oops! Guy sends naked selfies to HR department while applying for job

    The man apparently made a good impression during an interview with the unnamed business last month. “There was a conditional offer of employment made to this particular applicant,” Elmhurst Police Chief Michael Ruth told the Chicago Tribune.

    Shortly after, he “texted the HR director and sent a nude photo of himself.”

    Another revealing picture showed up a day later with no explanation. The company alerted cops who, “contacted the offender who admitted to sending the photographs.”

    Police reports confirm the man explained the photos were “meant for another individual and were sent to the victim in error.”

    1. Might have worked if he was applying to MWW.

    2. “the victim”??!!

      1. Seriously, how retrograde is that? They should be called “survivors.” It’s more empowering.

    3. So, maybe he believed in full disclosure?

      1. something something fill a position

    4. The company alerted cops who, “contacted the offender who admitted to sending the photographs.”

      Couldn’t just rescind the job offer or, I dunno, just call the guy?

  16. FBI Scours Clinton Server for Evidence of Spying

    The FBI has begun a probe into whether foreign intelligence services compromised Hillary Clinton’s e-mail server during and after her tenure as secretary of state, according to U.S. intelligence and Congressional officials.

    The damage assessment, which is part of the bureau’s investigation into whether the former secretary and her staff mishandled classified information, will hunt for digital traces of cyber-espionage by foreign governments. Even mundane and unclassified Clinton e-mails could provide important insights into the inner workings of the U.S. government and the actions of its top officials.

    1. They could just ask the NSA.

  17. America turning out a generation of little dummies as SAT scores are at their lowest level since the last time the test was dumbed-down. Sorry, I mean “overhauled”.

  18. Obama leaves $31 tip on $18 check, continues history of awesome generosity



    1. Hey look, a worshipper!

      And he claimed to be atheist, ha!

      1. shriek only leaves 8% tips

        1. He demands service excellence.

    2. And as usual he was being “generous” with taxpayer’s money.

      1. And in a super high-profile way. People who are actual and consistent generous tippers don’t go out of their way to publicize to the entire world how generous and awesome they are.

      2. *ding ding ding*

        BURN! Again.

  19. 15 per cent of British men (and a few women) would have sex with a robot

    The chaps who’d be up for courting a bot believed they could have a “fulfilling, emotional relationship” with a lifelike machine.

    However, the Sky News poll found only two per cent of women would date a droid.

    Top academic Dr Helen Driscoll believes humans having sex with robots could be “the norm” in 50 years.

    She claims advances in technology will change the way we interact with robots in the coming decades – and that virtual reality could soon “mimic and even improve” on sex with a human.

    1. What’s the % when it comes to an Agile Cyborg?

    2. Have you ever seen the average British woman? The robot from Lost in Space is more appealing.

      1. like this lovely lass?

          1. What the actual heck? That’s like Andy Capp + fat chicks.

            1. All hail the awesomeness that is Viz comic.

        1. LH, I have a certain set of skills. I’m going to find you and kill you.

          I’d rather do the starfish killing robot.

          1. You must first get past my minions.

            1. Before I get to you, or before I get to the starfish killing robot?

              I’ve seen your minions. Pasty eight year olds weak from 80 hours in your factories don’t scare me.

        2. I had previously believed all you mammals looked alike. However that particular departure from the bell curve proves me wrong.

      2. I choose to believe all British women look like this.

        1. I had a real weakness for 1970s Felicity Kendal when I was a kid watching Good Neighbors.

          1. Let’s not forget Lysette Anthony

    3. My wife dates a “robot” about 2-3x a week. Of course I get to help!

  20. Five of the most obscure college degrees in America

    It’s that time of year again ? the hallways and classrooms at universities across the country are filling with bleary-eyed students binge-drinking coffee before their 8 a.m. lecture.

    But for some students the class topics are a little out of the norm of typical collegiate learning.

    Here are five of the most obscure college degrees in America:

    1. Adventure Education ? Plymouth State University
    2. Cannabis Cultivation ? Oaksterdam University
    3. Viticulture and Enology ? Cornell University
    4. Race Track Management ? University of Arizona
    5. Puppet Arts ? University of Connecticut

    1. Puppet Arts is not obscure to seasoned Hit ‘n’ Runners

      1. Puppets creep me out.

        Clowns too.

    2. I’d think any college with a good ag program would have a Viticulture major these days. (And cannabis cultivation soon.)

      1. Speaking of viticulture, evidence that it began in France c. 500 BC


      2. The punchline is that the article was written by a Photojournalism major.

      1. Perhaps they offer that at the University of Zurich?

        1. I am hoping to get my Masters at the Eidgen?ssische Technische Hochschule Z?rich


          1. SS, by this point your gaze is so narrowed you’re a cyclops.

          2. Awesome.

    3. Adventure Education actually sounds pretty cool. Like, dream job cool.

      1. Yeah. Unfortunately, there are only three full-time Adventure Education jobs in the country.

          1. The Civil War was just one big adventure… with disease, hunger, and bloody wounds.

    4. I agree that they are obscure, but each actually provides instruction that could be applied in the production of goods and services that are desired by sane people.

      Obscure does not equal utterly ridiculous stuff like LBGTQ studies, feminist studies, critical theory, etc. which can only be applied to reduce the happiness of sane people.

  21. Judicial Watch: FEC Must Investigate Democratic National Committee for Employing Illegal Alien to Craft 2016 Political Message

    Judicial Watch announced today that it filed a complaint with the Federal Election Commission requesting that it investigate the Democratic National Committee (DNC) for having “knowingly hired” an illegal alien, Cindy Nava, to help craft the committee’s 2016 political message and communications. Judicial Watch filed its complaint on August 25, 2015.

    A June 8, 2015, story in The Washington Post reported that the DNC hired Nava with full knowledge of what DNC chair Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-FL) termed Nava’s “undocumented status.” The news report details that “Despite not yet attaining legal status, Nava is working for the Democratic National Committee as one of a crop of fellows from around the country helping the party organize ahead of a presidential election that President Obama predicted would feature immigration as a major issue.” The Spanish language newspaper El Nuevo Herald reports that Nava would help coordinate DNC outreach to “women, youth, and Hispanics.”

  22. ‘It’s not free’: Canadian health care insurance almost doubles in cost during last decade as average family pays $12K
    …An average Canadian family pays $12,000 per year for health care insurance and those costs have nearly doubled in the last decade, according to a Fraser Institute report.

    1. Don’t read the comments.

      National Post commenters are disappointing me these days.

    2. Last night I was on a call with a canadian and some brits. Somehow the topic turned to health issues and health care. They repeated horror story after horror story about crap service and protracted wait times, including a 24 hour wait to get an x-ray to determine that yes, that bone is in fact broken. (and even months of waiting on cancer diagnosis). My comment about “It took me all of two hours to get a pack of x-rays and I paid only $66 (all out of pocket) was met with deflection of “but some people don’t have $66”. Or “that’s $66 that could be used elsewhere”. The more the conversation dragged on and the more examples of prompt, competent care I got by paying out of pocket the more their own recourse was “but it’s free to me“. And this was after an anecdote about how they’d ended up worse off after a particular visit to the doctor and how they learned to stitch their own wounds because it would take too long to get the NHS to stop the bleeding.

      I was at a loss as to how they couldn’t put the pieces together.

      1. Really wish we could have more of these horror stories being related to people over here. The problem with single payer take time to build up, and by the time they do the people using it don’t know that incompetent slow to the point of dying in the line isn’t just part of life.

      2. OK, so I have a client who told me that her son’s covered for health care under her & the dad, but that the deductible from her insurance for the kid is over $2000. And this client works for a major hospital in the area.

      3. I would gladly pay $66 or even $660 dollars to find out right away if I had something broken.

        Heck the time I broke my ribs I was out in the boondocks. I went to a middle-of-nowhere town with the world’s smallest hospital. Within twenty minutes my chest was x-rayed. A few minutes later the doctor came in – two snapped bones found. I was sent on my way with a prescription of vicodin. I didn’t have to pay anything out of pocket either.

        Funny thing – I didn’t feel that bad until he told me that I had two broken ribs. Only then did it start to really hurt.

        1. You must have really snapped them. I had a fractured rib and that didn’t hurt until half way into the next day. Then again, I was drunk and playing “who can hit you in the chest harder” with my buddy. Ah, to be 25 again.

      4. Simple. Brainwashed. They will perform mental gymnastics to absurd levels.

        They don’t realize if the government gets out of health that means more disposable income which is probably worth more than $66. Once in your pocket, it’s your own responsibility to make good use of your money. Alas, this is where things go astray. People are sometimes not good with their money pissing it away rather than, say, saving $20 of that $66 in case they need it for an X-Ray.

        Plus. Not sure about the UK, but in Canada national health has insanely become part of the nationalist ethos; a political symbol of pride.

        It’s retarded.

        How can you make meaningful adjustments to it when people are so romantically (though to many it’s rational because America) attached to it?

        1. It’s like the Yugo as a symbol of national pride. When it’s all you got…

        2. I would have loved if the order of the conversation had been different so that I could have responded to their argument of “but some people might not get treatment” with “Dude, you’re stitching your own wounds closed because you already can’t get treatment. How much worse can it get?”

          1. As I mentioned recently, one hospital called to tell me there was an ‘indefinite’ waiting list to see an orthopedist for my knee. That’s a new word in the wonderful world of public health. I had to track down my original doctor who performed the surgery in 1990. I was told if he determines it to be urgent (which it isn’t, even though I need this screw to come out because it does hurt), it will be quick – one to two months – if not…twirls thumbs.

            Welcome to ‘free shit’ in all its glory.

        3. Not sure about the UK


      5. My friend always says, “You can’t beat free!” He had no problems getting furniture from the side of the road, because “hey, you can’t beat free!” Nevermind all the shit that would come with that “free furniture.” Yeah, you can also get free food out of dumpsters. Doesn’t mean you should want to eat there unless you were absolutely desperate.

        1. A free roadside couch is all fun and games, until you get it into your living room and a family of angry raccoons emerges from it.

          1. Uh, i heard.

      6. The problem with government medical schemes like National Health and Canadian single payer is that they seem like they are good until you get sick or injured. Then they suck really bad.

        Sure, they have “free” birth control and their essential emergency services (childbirth for example) cannot be too bad; otherwise, they’d lose popular support. However, for anything non-essential or out of the ordinary, the patient is screwed unless he has a disease with a lobby for special treatment (AIDS, for example). The number of discontented sick people will always be a very small fraction of healthy enrollees who are not dissatisfied with they system that they do not use.

        1. Sure, they have “free” birth control and their essential emergency services (childbirth for example) cannot be too bad; otherwise, they’d lose popular support. However, for anything non-essential or out of the ordinary, the patient is screwed unless he has a disease with a lobby for special treatment (AIDS, for example).

          The military healthcare system works the same way. When I was enlisted, I had pretty bad ingrown toenails that needed to be removed. The secretary told me I’d have to wait two months just to get an appointment–unless I said it was an “emergency”, then they could see me within a couple of days.

          So essentially, I was told to lie in order to get a simple outpatient procedure done by a military doctor in a timely manner. I said “fuck that” and went to the private clinic in town and was out in less than 2 hours. I suspect Canada and the UK’s systems work in pretty much the same manner–can be great if you have something truly severe, but if you need anything basic accomplished quickly you’re hosed. Leftists always tout the overall lower costs, but that’s because it’s heavily rationed to keep costs down and they studiously avoid mentioning that in their stupid Walter White’s Cancer memes.

          1. “stupid Walter White’s Cancer memes”

            Breaking Bad had all sorts of incredibly implausible twists that required suspension of disbelief, but the “cancer meme” was the most implausible. Walter White was a public school teacher in New Mexico. As such, he had medical insurance. It may not have covered every doctor in New Mexico, but it would have covered ordinary and necessary oncology treatment much better than ObamaCare. Even after he had to quit work, he would have been covered under his disability insurance. The meme was utterly disconnected from the real world.

  23. Covered wagon overturns, snarls traffic on Arkansas highway

    Arkansas State Police say the wagon being pulled by Karen Robertson of El Dorado had a mechanical malfunction a little before 3 p.m. Monday, and took a spill in in the eastbound lane of the Interstate 30 bridge in Little Rock. No one was injured.

    About 20,000 people head to Clinton, about 80 miles north of Little Rock, around Labor Day for the annual Chuckwagon Races, where teams of horses pulling covered wagons compete for prizes.

    State police spokesman Bill Sadler says all lanes were blocked briefly, but traffic began moving quickly.

    1. You have died of dysentery.

      1. Did he eat this?

      2. Karen should have just caulked it and floated it down the river.

  24. Steven Spielberg and the Temple of Obama
    …This effort began in November 2012, shortly after his reelection, when the president hosted filmmaker Steven Spielberg at the White House for a screening of Lincoln. President Obama was “spellbound,” the Times reports, as Spielberg held forth “about the use of technology to tell stories.”

    1. Not a cult.

    2. Steven Spielberg, the Hook auteur? That guy?

  25. Obamacare Gives Big Windfall To Insurance Companies As Quality of Healthcare Declines
    …Meanwhile, as Americans are suffering from rising costs and less access to quality health care, the biggest winners from the passage of Obamacare are the insurance giants. In the aftermath of the government health care takeover, there has been an explosion of health insurance company profits, windfalls and megamergers. As “stock market darlings,” health insurance company profits have skyrocketed to all-time highs and stocks have split even thanks to the health care law.

    Reports show the so-called “Big Five” health insurers ? UnitedHealth, Aetna, Cigna, Humana, and Anthem ? have all outperformed the broader stock market by a wide margin since Obamacare was signed into law in March 2010.

    1. The entire thing was a giant payoff to the insurance companies. Yet, every Prog is convinced it was for the poor and the less fortunate. I bet Obama laughs his sorry ass off every time he thinks about how stupid his supporters are.

      1. A heavily regulated, guaranteed profit ‘utility’ makes money for the stockholders. The Weigels of the world think that makes it Capitalism.

        1. Well, the Monsanto fan boys here think that big Ag gorging on subsidies is capitalism.

          1. Who are they? I am all for killing off all ag subsidies.

          2. Who are they? I am all for killing off all ag subsidies.

          3. Hey, liar. I’m still waiting for evidence of your claim of glyposate hypertoxity. Please don’t respond with non sequiturs like ‘Monsanto accepts subsidies’ or ‘Some company that performed testing for Monsanto falsified data on studies unrelated to glyposate.’

            If it makes you feel any better, I don’t buy by glyposate from Monsanto.

  26. Man suffering from constipation for 10 years has 11-pound stool removed

    The unidentified patient was evaluated at Second People’s Hospital in Chengdu, China, after complaining of stomach pain, Central European News (CEN) reported. While he had been admitted for the same pain previously, doctors had been unable to diagnosis the cause.

    A series of X-rays revealed that the patient’s heart had shifted to the right because his colon had swelled to twice the normal size, CEN reported. Doctors diagnosed him with congenital megacolon, which can cause paralysis of the movements of the bowel and can sometimes lead to fecal tumors.

    1. The stool is now running for office. See what I did there? Funny, no?

      1. I’m out of narrow gaze, would you prefer brooding reptile stare?

    2. Does the EFSM know of this?

    3. What was the weight in Courics?

    4. How many Courics is that?

    5. congenital megacolon

      I’m calling dibs on the band name.

      1. Damn you for getting in first!

        1. I left “fecal tumor” for you

          1. Eh…that might be an album name at best. 🙁

      2. They play speed metal. The lyrics are hard to make out, but they were written by SugarFree so that may be a good thing.

        1. “super poop
          you poop it
          super poop
          it poops you


          super poop
          doom of you
          doom of you
          doom of you”

      3. Eww! /teenage girl.

    6. I really didn’t need the Trump Origin story

      1. “This dump is ‘UUUUUGE!”

    …The press release announcing release of the first edition (for 2011) said that: “California, often thought of as the land of plenty” in the words Center on Poverty and Inequality director Professor David Grusky, is “in fact the land of poverty.”

    The latest California Poverty Measure estimate, for 2012, shows a statewide poverty rate of 21.8 percent, somewhat below the Supplemental Poverty Measure and well above the Official Poverty Measure that does not adjust for housing costs (16.5 percent)….

    …The original Stanford Center on Poverty and Inequality press release cited California’s dismal poverty rate as resulting from “a weak labor market and California’s notoriously expensive housing.” …

    1. The latest California Poverty Measure estimate, for 2012, shows a statewide poverty rate of 21.8 percent, somewhat below the Supplemental Poverty Measure and well above the Official Poverty Measure that does not adjust for housing costs (16.5 percent)

      Does it adjust for other costs, i.e. the much higher gas prices in California vs. Texas?

      This is a problem I’ve always had with official poverty measures – our poverty line is determined by the following:

      The U.S. Census Bureau determines poverty status by comparing pre-tax cash income against a threshold that is set at three times the cost of a minimum food diet in 1963, updated annually for inflation using the Consumer Price Index, and adjusted for family size, composition, and age of householder.

      This is a retarded metric. First of all, it’s pre-tax, so states with higher tax rates might have a lower poverty rate, but nonetheless have far more people struggling to pay the bills because a higher percentage of their income is taxed away. It completely fails to acknowledge differences in cost of living within America, so it severely under counts poverty in high tax blue states while over counting poverty in parts of the country with lower costs of living.


  28. Striking against The Man: Newly-introduced parking meters are being destroyed by vandals opposed to paying – with the damage bill topping $40,000

    1. I used to have this idea of attacking all the parking kiosks in the area with a chain saw – if the arm were removed, all cars could go park for free, or something. But I never carried it out.

      1. So like a sequel to Cool Hand Luke, with some Orange is the New Black thrown in?

        1. It’d be best if there were a team of people in trucks with chainsaws all hitting the kiosks at the same time.

    2. Yarraville == Westies == (probably) Housos, all over again.

    3. People don’t like it when the free lunch ends.

  29. “The family of a Syrian toddler whose body washed up on a Turkish beach had been trying to emigrate to Canada after fleeing the war-torn town of Kobani, one of their relatives told a Canadian newspaper on Thursday.”

    Remind me one more time of how that “Arab Spring” is working out these days. It sure looks like it has turned into a complete and total nightmare for Europe. You’re doin’ a heck of a job, Obama.

    I still shake my head thinking about how some of the more dopey Reasonoids really thought this was all going to turn out great.

    1. Remind me how that GOP led Nation Building turned out?

      1. So your guy has done nothing in his entire term, since only BOOOOOOSH has has any impact on that time?

        1. I don’t give a fuck if the entire Middle East fell into a sinkhole.

          1. Since your Chocolate Nixon gave Iran nukes, you’ll get your wish.

          2. I don’t give a fuck if the entire Middle East fell into a sinkhole.

            If that were true, you wouldn’t have just said;
            Palin’s Buttplug|9.3.15 @ 9:18AM|#

            Remind me how that GOP led Nation Building turned out?

            you lying, disingenuous shitbag.

      2. It’s all turning out even worse than that foolish publisher’s bad investment in your shitty Rock and Roll book that you’re never going to finish.

      3. Yeah. If Bush were still president, two toddlers would have washed up! Thanks, Obama!

        1. Start your Thursday morning right, with a tall cup of Dead Toddler Jokes?.

          1. How do you get a pile of dead toddlers out of the back of a truck? With a pitchfork!

            How do you get a dead toddler out of a blender? With a straw!

            I’ll be here all week. Try the veal.

            1. Try the veal.

              Is it toddler-free?

              1. You have to try the veal to find out what’s in it.

            2. I was being facetious. I’m going to go home an hug my toddler now.

            3. How do you get a pile of dead toddlers out of the back of a truck? With a pitchfork!

              That was the old “dead baby” joke…

              What’s the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can only unload one with a pitchfork.

              “Only one needs salt” was also acceptable

      4. You know that’s a tu quoque, Palin right? For once answer the assertion as presented rather than spinning off into your predictable ‘but Bush’ stance.

        1. Now this might be the most pointless H&R comment I’ve ever seen.

          1. Hey! Someone’s gotta try!

            1. No they don’t.

    2. How is Obama at fault for the Arab Spring failures? He’s an idiot who was a cheerleader of the movement because he doesn’t know anything about the world and had an irrationally idealistic view of how Arabs would behave themselves after ousting dictators, but he didn’t cause the Arab Spring, nor did he cause the chaos that followed.

      He is at fault for Libya, but even that was turning into a catastrophe before we made the mistake of toppling Qaddafi without a plan for what we were going to do after.

      1. Syria, the rise of ISIS, and the consequences of those two things on the rest of the middle east are all pretty much directly our government’s fault, and all of those actions were championed by Obama. Meddling in Egypt politically as well. Everything that could possibly be done to exacerbate the foreseeable clusterfuck resulting from the “Arab Spring”, we did.

      2. Not at fault, but he greatly exacerbated the catastrophe.

        Aside from sending all that “non-lethal aid” to groups that turned out to be al-Nusra and ISIS affiliates and vassals, or were simply stolen by these groups. Obama basically says to everyone, “If we get evidence that the Assad regime gases people, you’re going down like Gaddafi.” This creates a huge disincentive for the Assad regime to gas anyone and a huge incentive for the various terrorist organizations operating in that country to stage a gas attack to look like Assad’s work.

        All we can say for certain is that the attack happened and the incentives for everyone involved are what they are. And to my knowledge, there had been no gas attacks prior to Obama’s “red line” speech or since Obama made it clear that gas attacks will not earn the rebels an air force. It’s just all too coincidental.

        Most likely Obama didn’t follow through on his threats because he found out that terrorist groups he was touting as liberal democrats with guns, turned out to be ones gassing 1300 people. Which would be a little embarrassing.

      3. For an officer of the U.S. government, tasked with maintaining its current strategies, the answer was more complex. The U.S had to prevent enemies from taking power, and in a way that would endure. Saving a tottering dictatorship today in a hamfisted way, would likely inflame the oppressed’s passions even more, leading to a more determined effort to overthrow the dictatorship, and its replacement with something that hated Americans more implacably.

        For each country the options were:
        a) Support the dictator overtly in their bid to stay in power.
        b) Support the dictator covertly in a deniable way
        c) Cheer the dictator but do nothing more.
        d) Be neutral
        e) Support a rebel group covertly in a deniable way
        f) Support a rebel group overtly
        g) Cheer the rebels but do nothing more.

        A machiavellan policy could incorporate several options simultaneously. But, whatever policy one followed, it would have to be purposeful – ie chosen soberly based on the vision of the U.S. leadership – and with some organizing principle.

        Slipping into my ex-naval officer’s mindset, I would have recommended that the U.S. government adopted a public neutrality, and in the case of Egypt worked with the Mubarak to find a way for him to be ‘ousted’ without destroying the security agreement with Israel – ie to find a reformist that would make some reforms without removing Egypt from the U.S. sphere.

        1. In the case of Syria, the U.S. should also have remained publicly neutral, and allowed matters to take their course. Ditto with Libya.

          What the Obama administration did was pretty much the opposite of this:
          1) They initially cheered the rebels. The rebels quickly ran into difficulties in Libya and Syria. The U.S. announced that they would intervene on the rebels’ behalf. The proposed interventions were unpopular within the U.S. and highly illegal as proposed.

          2) In Egypt the rebels swept into power and immediately formed a government that was hostile to the U.S. and Israel. The U.S. then supported a reactionary counter-coup. This has made the population even more anti-American than it was previously. The counter-coup will have to rule more brutally than its predeccesors unless they figure out how to short circuit anger as to how they came to power.

          3) In Libya, the illegal bombing ignited a humanitarian crisis and unleashed bands of mercenaries and war parties that are chewing through the countryside, with the people coming out on top believing they have a religious duty to kill everyone who does not bend their knees to them – the more brutally the better.

          1. 4) In Syria, Obama’s nerve failed. The rebels were nominally anti-American, but allied with the pro American gulf arabs. The illegal bombing of Libya had hardened opposition to a similar adventure in Syria, and the public vacillation of the Obama adminstration resulted in the Gulf arabs backing the rise of ISIS – the same guys who were taking over Libya and the northern Sahara. Attempts to covertly support a chosen rebel group with military equipment ended up resupplying ISIS.

            The end result is that the most brutal gang is taking over the region, and the tide of refugees fleeing their swords and AK-47’s are washing up in Europe creating a huge political crisis.

            The Obama administration is not to blame for the Arab Spring. True.

            But, they handled it terribly. Navigating the revolutions required discretion, subtelty and a steady hand. They were indiscreet, hamfisted, and vaccilated from one day to the next. Their compass was not a long term vision, but the tenor of the op-eds in this morning’s New York Times and Wall street Journal

            1. If, as is being widely alleged, other heads of state were afraid to communicate with the U.S. because they were aware of Hillary Clinton’s gross dereliction of her duty to secure her communications, they couldn’t act with discretion – the only avenues open to them were overt acts on the part of the U.S.

              Again, that reflects on the dereliction of Obama as a head of state.

              In the end, it’s possible that a competent U.S. foreign policy aparatt would have been unable to keep the Arab Spring from spawning ISIS and the waves of refugees fleeing the charnel house that Arab and North African lands are becoming. But, Obama’s incompetent handling pretty much guaranteed the current mess.

              1. Shit: I left off the begining of my essay!

                IT should ahve started thus:

                The Arab Spring confronted the U.S. government with a terrible dilemna; it was a rebellion against dictators and the oligarchs at the center of various states which not only supressed the popular will, but also enriched themselves at the expense of the common people. The oppression was ruthless, ensuring most people lived in grinding poverty on the edge of starvation or death from disease, while the elites vacationed in Paris and drove Mercedes.

                Some of these dictators were allies of the U.S. government, with the U.S. government assisting them in quelling the opposition.

                For a guy like me, the answer would be simple, let the people rise up, and let the dictators fall.

                But for the U.S. government, the answer was not so simple; in many of the countries the popular will was Islamic theocracy; in Egypt, the group poised to take over was the father of Al Queda, the Moslem Brotherhood.

                1. Well put.

                2. Dang, tarran….that was pretty well put together.

                3. ^ THIS.

                  Despite what some Americans, even many Americans who fancy themselves as quite sophisticated, the world does not revolve around US foreign policy.

                  Something like the Arab Spring was bound to happen sooner or later. Whether it evolved into a good thing or a bad thing could possibly be influenced by US foreign policy, but could never be determined by US foreign policy. Regardless, it is now obvious that Clinton, State Department career staff, and US intelligence services did much that harmful to the interests of peace and civilization, and very little that was constructive. To make things worse, the propaganda from the US media was absolutely dreadful; Al Jazeera provided much more insightful and credible coverage despite its own bias.

                  The fact of the matter is that, just about everywhere in the world, local political, economic, and cultural relationships are insanely complex. Foreign policy analysts seem to abstract these relationships to identify good guys and bad guys. That good-guy-bad-guy model kind of worked after WWII with Nazis and Shinto militarists. However, anti-communism proved to be a less useful determinant of good guys and bad guys during the Cold War. It utterly fails in conflicts involving Muslims. It also fails in places like the Ukraine.

  30. The right wing’s hideous crusade against Michelle Obama has completely fallen apart
    For years, the likes of Rush Limbaugh have lobbed racist, sexist invective at the First Lady. But it didn’t matter

    Obama has been an exemplary first lady and is extremely popular with the public, having shown good humor and style throughout her tenure; so it’s been very difficult for the right to find anything to criticize.That hasn’t stopped them, of course. There is nothing even remotely controversial about her work with military families, a constituency they feel belongs to them, so anything they might pounce on there is an unlikely target for GOP ire. But this mother of two daughters having the temerity to initiate a program to encourage kids to eat healthy foods and exercise has sent them into fits of hysteria.

    Think about that: Something adults have been doing since the beginning of time ? telling kids to eat their vegetables and go outside to play ? is a Marxist plot to destroy the fabric of our civilization.

    1. But this mother of two daughters having the temerity to initiate a program to encourage kids to eat healthy foods and exercise has sent them into fits of hysteria.

      And exactly what authority does she have under the Constitution to initiate squat?

      1. And they aren’t being encouraged to eat healthy food. They are being required to do so through the Department of Education.

        1. because apparently, “since the beginning of time” when this sage advice began, not all of the king’s children have been following it.

        2. To be clear, skim milk is not a healthy food.

          1. “The only thing i hate more than a liar is skim milk. Because it’s water… that’s lying about being milk.”

    2. Reminds me of when the Wingnuttery freaked out when Obama addressed school kids to tell them to do their homework if they wanted to succeed.

      1. Hey Weigel. Were you cruising that school in your windowless van at the time?

      2. Shorter shreek. “You leave Obama alone”.

        You retards are so funny. You really are going to go down with this retard’s ship. Not a single person under 70 to run for President, no governors of note, control only thirty percent of the state legislatures, smallest minority in Congress in 80 years, but you still love Obama. They still send you the same tired ass talking points.

        Obama might as well have been a Manchurian Candidate sent over by Karl Rove. And you retards just can’t get enough of him as you lose every elected office in the country.

        1. I think that Kentucky clerk should run for president. She’s got as good a chance as any other Democrat at this point.

          1. Absolutely. What is Hillary going to say against her? That she broke the law?

          2. Better chance than Webb.

          3. Now that I think about it, that would be an epic troll of EVERYBODY.

        2. Don’t forget that, unlike TEH RACEIST TEATHUGLIKKKANZ, all of the Democratic candidates are old, white, and with one exception, men.

          But the Dem candidates have the right FEELZ and Ben Carson isn’t really black because he’s conservative.

      3. Shorter PB: tu quoque, tu quoque,tu quoque,tu quoque,tu quoque,tu quoque,tu quoque,..

        Jesus, do you ever have anything else, dipshit?

    3. I’m still wondering when she’s finally going to hit a treadmill herself.

      1. She’s just big-boned!

    4. The horrible school lunches, and the Orwellian paeans to “First Lady Obama for making our lunches more healthy” issued by the aparatchniks in their schools are having the opposite to the intended effect.

      A lot of kids, instead of feeling gratitude towards the Obamas, the Democratic Party, and the State, are instead blaming them for their hungry bellies by the time the end of the day is rolling around.

      1. Yep – It became a standing joke in my kid’s last public school. Unfortunately I had to start making the kids sandwiches before going to work every morning so they didn’t have to eat that crap.

        1. Local news here ran a great comparison article about lunches that totally shamed the largest public school in the area, who were embracing the first lady’s “campaign.” The news reporter went to three or four different districts and photographed lunch trays for each district. Largest district, and the one with the poorest kids, had the most pathetic trays.

      2. My kid’s school started the free breakfast thing this year. The nutritious menu includes:

        – Froot Loops with a graham cracker
        – Cinnamon Toast Crunch
        – Frosted Flakes
        – Pancake stick with chocolate chips
        – biscuit with eggs (one day a week)

        All with skim milk of course

        1. A lot of kids only real meal comes at school. And that bitch is basically starving them. You really can’t overstate how awful she is.

          1. A lot of kids only real meal comes at school.

            and the state’s response is 180 degrees from what anything resembling sanity.

          2. I’d like to see what was on her menu during the Martha’s Vineyard excursion.

          3. A lot of kids only real meal comes at school.

            I seriously doubt that. I think a lot of parents are just fucking lazy.

            1. I used to but then I got to know a few people who worked in very poor school districts. It is totally true. You wouldn’t believe the shit that goes on. They have kids show up to school with backpacks full of clothes because they have no idea where they are going to stay. They just get passed around from relative to relative. And I am not talking about teenagers. I am talking about nine and ten year old kids.

              Of course it is not because this country is poor or that their parents can’t afford to feed them. It is because their parents and families are evil scumbags who just don’t give a shit. A whole lot of kids in this country have no one on earth who gives a flying fuck about their welfare, least of all their parents.

          4. A lot of kids only real meal comes at school.

            That’s what happens when you sell your EBT card…

    5. the Right-wing Derangement Syndrome at Salon never takes a day off, does it. Good night, can you imagine having to be around people like this for any length of time.

  31. At a sensuous retreat, female sexual desire takes center stage
    Madsen starts retreats by getting naked for a live demo: “I have arousal, I have orgasms, I laugh, I giggle …”

    Pamela Madsen’s Back to the Body sensuous retreats for women are a lot like Ye Olde Hysteria Treatments, but with a sensitive, “viva womanhood” spin. Madsen, a sexuality and relationship coach, uses terms like “crisis of female desire,” “vaginal disconnect” or just “angry pussies,” but we’re talking about the same thing: Women not being in touch with their desire, women being ashamed of their desire and/or women not expressing their desire and riding it like the wild pony it is.

    The retreats, often set in glorious settings like Tuscany, offer hands-on “Taoist sensuous bodywork” sessions, workshops and exercises to overcome body shame and explore desires as well as group discussions on body image, expressing desire, and how to be open to pleasure in daily life. (Or so I’m told; retreats are super-pricey, 4 to 5 grand. Further on in the story we’ve got tips for a DIY budget plan.)

    “One of our core teachings is that your pussy is your pilot light. It’s your central life force energy,” says Madsen.

    1. I….I…got nothing.

      Hey, SugarFree – you make anything of this?

      1. All I know is that if anyone knows anything about female desire, it is this sexy beast.

    2. Yet at the same time, they expect to be treated as more than a vagina with a life support system.

    3. Another article about “angry pussies” from Salon.

    4. I think we all need to take Vaginal Disconnect seriously; after all, women suffering from a Disconnected Vagina aren’t able to follow their “pussy lights” and end up with “angry pussies.” Wild ponies… I give up. I can’t.

    5. Gee, who knew this would happen after embracing feminism?

    6. One of our core teachings is that your pussy is your pilot light.

      You mean, the thing that goes out, and ends up blowing up the house?

  32. http://radaronline.com/celebri…..ails-sale/

    Hackers offer to sell entire set of Hillary’s unreleased “private emails” for 500K. Hello, Gofundme, Kickstarter. Assuming the offer is legit, it would take 30 seconds to raise the money?

    1. Shit, that’d be a bargain for the GOP considering they wouldn’t have to spend any money on the campaign of their eventual candidate.

      1. The only Republican who would have the balls to do that would be Trump or maybe Cruz and Cruz wouldn’t have the money. If I had the kind of money where 500K was pocket change, I would so buy those things. Set up a website and just leak a couple of really good ones every day between now and the election.

      2. True, but it would effectively end any legal case, right?

        1. Why? A legal case might derail John’s plan if they were subpoenaed – then just dump them all and turn it over to the FBI.

        2. Why? Private parties are not restricted by the Constitution. Those emails could still be used against her in court even if they were stolen, as long it was a private party who stole them and not the government.

          As they say in Law School, you don’t have a due process rights with your girlfriend.

          1. I was thinking more of chain of custody. Couldn’t a defense lawyer argue that it was not possible to tell which e-mails were legit and which had been fabricated?

            1. That is a good point. Getting them admitted into court would be tricky. One way you could do it would be to put the recipients on the stand and have them identify the email. But they could easily claim not to remember.

              I think it would be virtually impossible to admit them. But it wouldn’t prevent you from admitting copies you found yourself that had a chain of custody.

            2. All you’ve really need to prove is that she has ONE work related email that she didn’t turn over, and you’ve got her for evading records keeping. Once you have the stash, you can start hunting the people down she sent the emails to and one of them will cave and show you the email were they received it. Plus, her allies would flee and turn state witness in a heartbeat if the dirty laundry was going to be published publicly. It doesn’t even need to make it all the way to court to prompt enough folks to turn on Clinton to see her to jail.

            3. She’s never going to jail, so chain of custody doesn’t matter. All that we can really hope for it to keep the vile creature out of the White House.

            4. Couldn’t a defense lawyer argue that it was not possible to tell which e-mails were legit and which had been fabricated?

              If he wanted to really get into the issue of how the server was set up, how many security holes it had, how many people hands the emails had been through, etc., sure.

              It wouldn’t be terribly difficult to turn the argument about chain of custody back on him, by pointing out that his client had, and probably still has, the means to conclusively prove whether the emails are legit. With a tiny bit of luck, you could get him to deny that an email in your batch was not legit, even though it had also been turned over to the feds. At that point, he’s fucked.

        3. The republican party isn’t an official part of the legal system. Evidence isn’t considered tainted when they find it without a warrant.

        4. I don’t know why it would end the legal case. Acquiring all the evidence that you are lookinf for rarely does, after all.

    2. Breitbart and the Daily Caller offered or paid similar sums for Weigel’s Journalist archive. This will happen.

      1. 500K isn’t that much money. If this is legit, someone will buy it and make them public. And if these hackers don’t have them, some hacker somewhere does. Dozens if not hundreds of people knew about her private email server. And really, no email server is completely secure. No way in hell it wasn’t hacked multiple times by multiple parties.

        1. 500K isn’t that much money.

          500K is still a King’s ransom. How much would you pay for a Clinton or Bush to have his thumb screws loosened?

          1. Not after taxes, etc. It isn’t enough for someone with the access (basically, a DC nerd of some kind) to pull the trigger, i.e. – if they can’t payoff the mortgage or relocate easily they won’t do it.

    3. How would you verify this in a way that kept them from running away with the cash?

      1. Carefully. You would have to have them send you samples to show they had them. Then maybe an encrypted file with them giving you the password after you pay them the money.

        It would still be risky. But if they produced a dozen or so emails that had hallmarks of legitimacy, I am sure there are technical ways to tell if it is an actual email and not just a text file, it would be worth taking the risk.

        1. Maybe they could demand to see and verify the emails first and then pay? There’s enough people with reputations to keep that want this, a reasonable argument could be made that the one paying isn’t at risk of not holding up their end of the deal.

          1. Just escrow the cash with Julian Assange.

    4. THAT’S gotta be worth something to someone out there with coin.

    5. Anyone caught touching those stolen emails with a ten foot pole would be in a federal pound-me-in-the-ass-prison for a very long long time, since they’re absolutely rife with state secrets.

      1. That is a great point. I hadn’t thought of that. The National Security Act is a strict liability statute. Generally people who don’t know information is classified are not prosecuted but I am sure DOJ would make an exception for Hillary’s emails.

        1. All they’d have to prove is that the accused has heard of the investigation into Hilary’s emails to establish some mea culpa.

        2. Of course, when you buy them you don’t know if they have state secrets. And Hillary’s camp isn’t in a position to complain about it.

          Plus, do the feds really want to prosecute a citizen for having classified emails, and not the source of the leak itself? I doubt it. Not in a case as high-profile as this.

          Easiest way to handle it is to give the encrypted file and the password to the feds. You haven’t opened the file yet, so you’re good. Also give the encrypted file to some overseas journalists, and keep the password to give them later if the feds don’t play nice.

        1. *flings diaper at Swiss*

          1. Loaded or unloaded?

      1. Two babies enter, one baby leaves.

        1. It cuts my property taxes by 50%?

          I’ll pay extra to watch,,,

    1. Those people should just be shot. No one who would do that has any value as a human being or any business breathing the rest of the world’s air.

      1. I shouldn’t have laughed as hard as I did when I read that…

    2. /takes notes.

    3. filming brawls between toddlers on Snapchat.

      The first rule of Child Abuse Club is; YOU DON’T POST IT ON SNAPCHAT.

      The second rule of Child Abuse Club; YOU DON’T POST IT ON SNAPCHAT.

  33. Semi OT: I can’t stand seeing pictures of Hillary. And thanks to Reason for making me see bunches of them today. They should post trigger warnings over each photo.

    1. But you’re a woman with a vaj-vag; therefore you are required to vote for the Hildabeast.

      1. If that’s a requirement I may turn in my membership.

        1. The Great Vajonus will forgive you.

        2. You’re going to turn off your pilot light?

    2. Semi OT: I can’t stand seeing pictures of Hillary.

      Especially the ginormous, screen-filling one at the top of the page right now. I’m already fighting a bug right now, I don’t need anything else to bring me even further under the weather.

  34. Can someone please explain why the fuck this Richard Fowler guy is a lefty talking head on Fox News? It seems like every time I see him pop up it’s because he just said something staggeringly idiotic. The first time I saw him was when he said “freedom of speech comes with limits while blaming Pamela Geller for her own attempted murder and now he’s trying to claim Jared Loughner was a Tea Partier who tried to kill Giffords because of evil right-wingers.

    1. I think you answered your own question.

      1. This.

        I bet Roger Ailes writes his talking points.

    2. Can someone please explain why the fuck this Richard Fowler guy is a lefty talking head on Fox News?

      Because “Fair and Balanced.”

      1. They will need an openly gay correspondent for “Flair and Brilliance.”

        1. They’ve got Shepard Smith.

          1. “Mah name is Shepard Smith, and ah come from a small town full of secrets.”

              1. Huh – didn’t know.

                He has good taste.

                I love how hard they’re trying to dig for something sordid but there doesn’t seem to be anything.

    3. Fowler is just a heel cutting a promo on the the American Bombshell.

    4. Fox has to have liberals in these fake TV debates, so the hire the dumbest ones they can find. Juan Williams, Bob Beckel, Geraldo Rivera, and this new retard. They make great punching bags.

      1. Fox has to have liberals in these fake TV debates, so the hire the dumbest ones they can find.

        Because they can’t get Rachel Maddow, Chris Matthews, Al Sharpton, or Chris Hayes- that kind of dumb is reserved for PMSNBC

  35. well that’s settled then:

    Hillary Clinton’s emails are about as scandalous as my grandmother’s recipe for tater-tots. What a waste of newsprint. Focus on real issues.

    1. FAKE SCANDAL!!!!!

      God doesn’t give with both hands.

    2. What she doesn’t say is that her Grandmother was a Russian agent who used tater-tot recipes to encode secret messages.

    3. Those kinds of things make me happy. Hillary is going down in flames. I seriously doubt she is going to be the nominee and if she is, she can’t win at this point. So, I want to see a lot of real dead ender Hillary fans as butt hurt as possible if she is not the nominee. I want a whole lot of Hillary fans angry and bitter that the Democrats betrayed Hillary even though it was finally going to be a woman’s turn. So keep preaching it Olivia. You go girl.

      1. Even among my lefty friends, no one is defending her anymore. It’s nice to see. Unfortunately, they all seem to like Sanders. But I don’t think he has a chance either.

    4. #bobbleheadlivesmatter

    5. She was the only reason I watched House. And here my wife thinks I actually liked the show.

      1. I preferred Jennifer Morrison.

        1. You didn’t see the Ep where Lisa Edelson did the schoolgirl/poledance thing?

      2. If you don’t like House you can giiiiit out.

  36. Politico reporting that Trump supposedly plans to sign a GOP loyalty pledge and forego a possible third-party run as early as tomorrow.

    1. And if he breaks it? What are they going to do? Sue him? It is not like his crazed supporters are going to care. That said, I really don’t think he plans to run as a third party. I think he thinks he doesn’t need to and can win the GOP nomination. And he may be right.

    2. This strikes me as completely unenforceable.

  37. Spot the Not: bending the rules

    1. Mormon bubble “porn”: sexually suggestive images that contain no nudity. The name comes from the bubble-like shapes drawn on the image.

    2. Sabbath phone: a phone for Orthodox Jews in which picking up the handset opens a circuit instead of closing it, thus avoiding the rule against kindling a fire.

    3. Pick your poison: Although they believed the world would end without constant human sacrifice, the Aztecs gave most female captives a choice of either being sacrificed or becoming a sex slave for the priests.

    4. Weekend marriage: a temporary marriage that allows Muslims to have sex without being guilty of fornication.

    5. Calf-killing collar: pious Hindus do not harm cows, so to dispose of unwanted calves, they put a triangular collar around the calf’s neck. When the calf tries to drink from its mother, the collar pokes the mother and the mother kicks the calf away. The calves die from either the kick or the lack of milk.

    6. The useless dagger: Sikh men are required to carry a dagger by their religion. However, since carrying weapons is illegal in many places, some Sikhs wear a dagger which is welded to the scabbard, thus rendering it harmless and legal.

    1. Heard of number four before, but I’m not sure it was for Muslims.

    2. I’m going with 3.

      Couple reasons:

      1. Aztecs usually made you a slave before you were sacrificed. Sacrifice was one method of resolving the power discrepancies between slave owners and non-slave owners in a tribal society. Cannibalism resolved the same imbalances in other tribal societies.

      2. Also, being sacrificed was considered an honor. My understanding is that they used to have a team handball tournament–and the winners were given the privilege of being sacrificed. Think about that.

    3. I’m pretty sure I’ve heard #4 before.

    4. 2 because you can’t open a circuit any more than close one. In addition, some poskim (rabbinical authorities) have prohibitions about picking up and using “everyday” objects. (Hey, I wasn’t always a Germanic Neopagan!)

        1. Holy shit!! I never would have believed it. You still can’t use it for social calls on the Sabbath.

    5. 3 is the Not. The Aztecs drowned young women for Chicomecoatl, the goddess of farming.

      your prize is a sample of Mormon bubble porn: http://i.imgur.com/yEnsa.jpg

      awww, yeah…

  38. The Clintons’ plan to counterattack Obama
    The president holds the cards and they are damning

    The Clintons must also go on offense, meaning possibly threatening Mr. Obama with her knowledge of any relationship he may have had with the Clinton Foundation donor network, the lies about Benghazi, and so on. Whether or not their side of this highwire negotiation works depends on what leverage they have against him.

    It also means threatening anyone who gets in her way of the nomination. In a panicky attempt to scare off other contenders such as Vice President Joe Biden, she claimed that she already has substantial (but easily changeable) delegate support. While it may be tough for her to directly attack Mr. Biden, she may choose to attack others close to him to get him to think twice.

    1. the lies about Benghazi

      I’m calling BS on this one. Anything bad Hillary can reveal about Benghazi will reflect at least as bad on her, as well. I think she knows that the less Benghazi is mentioned, the better.

  39. “Bryan Pagliano, a State Department staffer who worked on Hillary Clinton’s private email server, has been subpoenaed by Congress and plans to invoke the Fifth Amendment.”

    It’ll be a sad day for Republicans candidates everywhere if Hillary loses the nomination.

    Everybody knows this is a preview of what the Hillary Administration will be like, even the Democrats, and she’s much easier to beat than the others–just because of that.

    From both a winnability standpoint and a philosophical standpoint, we should all pray that Liz Warren doesn’t run. I’d rather have Hillary the Hated in office than Wampum Warren. Such choices. America, we’re so fucked.

    1. I worry most about bern. Liz would be bad but id rather have her over bern. Her crusade is only on wall street…i think she does so because her donations are lawyer. She is a crony capitalist corporatist playing a demagogue

      Bern concerns me cause he wants all this free shit brought to you by the govt…vermont scrapped single payer but yet he wants to impose it on the whole country. It is like he is unphased

      1. I have thought about this, but none of the Dems who have won the presidency since FDR openly proclaimed themselves as leftists (socialists, choose whatever term you like).

        Harry Truman: Pragmatic, “The buck stops here”, anti-communist
        JFK: An ardent anti-communist and he ran against unshaven Nixon.
        LBJ: Southern Democrat.
        Jimmy Carter: Pretty much fatigue from Watergate and was a Naval officer.
        Bill Clinton: Our version of Tony Blair, “centrist” Third way type.
        Obama: Anyone with a fucking brain new he was a leftist, but being black this was the
        trump card. Ideology was secondary for alot of his voters.

        1. … Ideology was secondary irrelevant for a lot of his voters.

  40. State Department staffer who worked on Hillary Clinton’s private email server

    Why was a public employee working on a private server located in her personal residence? Who assigned him to that work and brushed away any concerns he had?

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