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Rachel Dolezal Sued Historically Black College for Racial Discrimination, Pope Francis Talks About Climate Change: A.M. Links

Robby Soave | 6.16.2015 9:00 AM

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  • Rachel Dolezal
    Youtube

    This is truly the story that keeps delivering: Rachel Dolezal once sued Howard University for discriminating against her because she was white. Still, she says she has identified as black since age five.

  • Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.
  • A balcony collapsed near the University of California, Berkeley, killing five people believed to be students.
  • U.S. drone strikes killed Al Qaeda's leader in Yemen.
  • Have you seen the raccoon balancing on an alligator's back yet?
  • Watch KC Johnson discuss the Amherst College rape case on Megyn Kelly's show.
  • What The Washington Post gets wrong (and right) about campus rape statistics.

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NEXT: Andrea Castillo on the Crypto Wars 2.0

Robby Soave is a senior editor at Reason.

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  1. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    U.S. drone strikes killed Al Qaeda’s leader in Yemen.

    They’ll just get a new one, you know.

    1. Slammer   10 years ago

      “All the people martyring him just proves how strong Al-Qaeda still is!!!”

      1. CatoTheChipper   10 years ago

        That Allah would welcome a new martyr to heaven for a romp with his 72 virgins shows how He loves those who would fight jihad.

    2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      Hello.

    3. WoodchipsandDerp   10 years ago

      Mr. Wuhayshi, 38, who had led Qaeda operations in Yemen since 2002 and was also the global extremist network’s second-ranking leader

      They’ll run out of number 2’s any day now

      1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        Not while this guy is around.

      2. Peachy rex   10 years ago

        I wonder if they’ve considered just eliminating the #2 position entirely – what would we do then?

        1. Mark22   10 years ago

          You show that turd who’s in charge.

          1. B.P.   10 years ago

            Winner.

      3. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        “Congratulations, Mustapha, you are the new Number Two!”

        “Look, I *said* I was sorry about boning your wife!”

        1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

          Alternate joke: Al Quaeda officially has more Number Twos than *The Prisoner.*

          1. ThisWoodchipperKillsFascists   10 years ago

            Do they have that funky chair? I hope they do.

      4. Puddin' Stick the Dark One   10 years ago

        He wasn’t actually #2… he just looked like it.

    4. Chinny Chin Chin   10 years ago

      Back in the day, military units were identified on the battlefield by their unique banners. It was a great honor to carry the colors into a fight, and opposing warriors took pride in killing the bearer. Rarely, though, did the death of a banner-man change the outcome of a battle.

      I’m beginning to think all these terrorist leaders are like those guys running into battle with a flag.

      1. Pathogen   10 years ago

        vexillarius

    5. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

      Al Qaeda leadership

      1. GamerFromJump   10 years ago

        The idea that “you can’t just keep wasting them, more will just pop up” is learned helplessness and magical thinking. You’re either ascribing magical hydra-like regenerative powers or admitting that the other adherents of the religion are just awaiting the right trigger to activate, and thus any notion that “it’s not the whole religion, just a few bad apples” is a PR lie, and it IS the whole religion.

        Otherwise, simple mathematical fact is that if you take out enough of the bosses, you’ll eventually run out.

  2. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    Rachel Dolezal once sued Howard University for discriminating against her because she was white. Still, she says she has identified as black since age five.

    Whatever color, she’s got the perpetual victimhood thing down pat.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      Isn’t this just what you’d expect from a fuckin’ wigger?

      1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Oh, no, you dint…

      2. expat   10 years ago

        Not cool.

      3. Zeb   10 years ago

        “Wafrican American”, please.

        1. Bobarian (sexbot hand model)   10 years ago

          South African American?

    2. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      I fail to see how one fact is relevant to the other.

  3. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Oh Florida Colorado Man

    Colorado man shoots himself in foot twice to see what it feels like

    Adam Hirtle allegedly opened fire on his own lower limb Wednesday night after becoming curious about what sensations he would experience, reports the Denver Post.

    The 30-year-old was inside his Colorado Springs home’s garage when he took off his boot and fired a slug from his .22 caliber, semi-automatic handgun into his foot.

    He then placed his boot back on ? and pulled the trigger again to see if the feeling was any different.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      Here’s your sign, Colorado Man….

    2. SugarFree   10 years ago

      I tried to tell you idiots that gay marriage would lead to this kind of stuff, but you just laughed and called me names.

      1. gaijin   10 years ago

        gay marriage…I thought it was The Pot??

        1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

          It’s Colorado.

          The evil root cause was TABOR.

          1. CatoTheChipper   10 years ago

            No. The root cause is ObamaCare.

            Guy had no financial consequences for shooting himself in the foot.

        2. 2ndClassProle   10 years ago

          Is he Mexican?

      2. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

        I thought they laughed and called you names because you have a big red nose.

    3. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      PS Was this gentleman a member of the Barney Fife Society? Or does the article not specify (too lazy to rtfa)…

    4. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

      So suddenly scientific curiosity is something to be ridiculed.

      1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

        Did he have a notebook? “June 15 – experimenting with two rounds of Remington Thunderbolt .22 Long Rifle ammunition. How I came to acquire ANY .22 ammunition in the current climate, I’ll leave for another day. In my lah-BORE-atory, I assembled the rounds next to my trusty old Colt New Frontier single action revolver. I arranged a sort of backstop onto which I would place my foot, whilst guarding against a ricochet after firing. I noted the time, temperature, humidity and barometric pressure, as I always do during my experiments.

        THEN I BUST A CAP IN MY GODDAMN FOOT MOTHERFUCKER THAT HURTS JESUS FUCK ME OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWO!!!!!”

      2. Ivoted4KODOS   10 years ago

        So suddenly scientific curiosity is something to be ridiculed

        You win the internet for June 16th, 2015!

      3. GamerFromJump   10 years ago

        Was it preceded by “Hey, y’all watch this!”?

    5. ThisWoodchipperKillsFascists   10 years ago

      Wasn’t this an alternate ending in “the pawnbroker?”

    6. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      He then placed his boot back on ? and pulled the trigger again to see if the feeling was any different.

      Ahhhh the rigors of science.

  4. Jordan   10 years ago

    Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.

    I see he’s aiming to be the head of two major religions.

    1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

      The Carbon Cult tithes in bigger lumps.

      1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        Once a Carbon tax is passed, you will tithe whether you like it or not.

    2. Ivan Pike   10 years ago

      I see he’s aiming to be the head of two major religions.

      Three

  5. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.

    Condoms for everyone!

    1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Yeah, someone was apparently beating the overpopulation drum really loud at some Vatican climate summit recently.

      However, Fisty is right that this could be the thing that causes the hierarchy to relent on at least some forms of contraception. Will be interesting to see how they weasel out of the “every sperm is sacred except for involuntary emmissions” corner they’ve painted themselves into. But then religious dogma needs neither internal consistency nor external validity.

      1. Medical Physics Guy   10 years ago

        Fact: 1 out of 4 college students today has experienced involuntary emissions.

        1. Charles Easterly   10 years ago

          All on the same day?

          What a mess.

    2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      I laughed hard.

      It takes a lot of double think to do Malthusian population control and sperm preciousness at the same time.

      1. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

        Unless it is a straw man.

    3. Pathogen   10 years ago

      “Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.”

      Don’t push your moldy old religious dogma on me!.. wait.. climate change? Thank god for this saint!

  6. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

    A balcony collapsed near the University of California, Berkeley, killing five people believed to be students.

    Sparing them a life of microaggressions and constantly being offended.

    1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      That is actually horrible.

      1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

        Yes, I know. But once I hit submit I couldn’t take it back.

        I was just hoping no one would notice it.

        1. Judge Forrest's Clitdong   10 years ago

          They were saved from microaggressions by the help of a macrocompression.

          1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            You laugh now but that balcony probably contained the sum total of all the Berkeley libertarian clubs who were getting together for a conference.

            1. Ivoted4KODOS   10 years ago

              You laugh now but that balcony probably contained the sum total of all the California libertarian(s) who were getting together for a conference

              FTFY

      2. GamerFromJump   10 years ago

        Horribilarious, even.

  7. gaijin   10 years ago

    what if there were a dataset of temperature that was so well done, so scientifically accurate, and so completely free of bias that by its design, there would never be any need nor justification for any adjustments to the data?

    NOAAs own data shows cooling trend in NA

    Settled science…now with moar Faith!

    1. Medical Physics Guy   10 years ago

      I’m no climate expert but I am a scientist, and I have to say, as far as I can tell Tony Watts runs rings around the competition. I don’t care who funds him, his arguments and data analysis are always much more nuanced and compelling than the right-thinking climate change talking points.

      1. Brett L   10 years ago

        That was what sold me, too. Also the rough UHI experiment he performed was one of those great moments in simple science like Feynman freezing the small rubber O-ring in his ice water at a Challenger press conference. (Which he later admits in his memoirs was suggested and facilitated by the AF general).

        1. Puddin' Stick the Dark One   10 years ago

          I thought Sally Ride suggested it… she was feeding Feynman information through General Kutyna and anonymous notes.

      2. gaijin   10 years ago

        Agree. I also think that ‘climate experts’ is a term that does not necessarily equate to climate science any longer.

    2. WoodSlayer   10 years ago

      The data were adjusted upward by 0.12?C to make them “homogeneous” with the longer-running temperature records taken from engine intake channels in marine vessels.

      That’s like, well, I better adjust my weather station to match the temp reading on my car’s dashboard. Un-fucking-believable.

  8. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Smelling salts for John…

    CDC: Average American Woman Now Weighs As Much As 1960s US Man

    The average American woman now weighs as much as the average American man weighed in 1960.

    Both U.S. men and women have been packing on the pounds since 1960, with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention showing that the average American woman now weighs 166.2 pounds ? nearly identical to what American men weighed in the 1960s. And U.S. men have expanded greatly in the same time period, having gained nearly 30 pounds from the 1960s to 2010 ? 166.3 pounds to 195.5 pounds today.

    1. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

      I could stand to lose a few pounds, but if I dropped all the way to 166 I’d be unable to carry my gym bag.

      1. SugarFree   10 years ago

        The average American man was 5′ 8″ in the same time period.

        1. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

          I figured that would be part of it, but that’s a lot more than I would have thought.

        2. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

          I was going to say, I weigh more than 166 pounds and I’d actually feel unbearably skinny if I were that thin.

    2. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

      Buried the lede: Average American male gained 30 lbs from 166 to 195.

      Better back away from those pork chops (Not really, protein is fine. Give ups the sugar, fatties).

      1. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

        Bury the lede? That male weight gain average is all because of one outlier – Warty.

      2. Brett L   10 years ago

        Maybe cause they squat more?

        1. Warty   10 years ago

          They don’t. Again, I skew the mean.

  9. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    Have you seen the raccoon balancing on an alligator’s back yet?

    From Florida Man’s gallery exhibit.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      I understand he has a painting of this scene. On black velvet, of course.

  10. Gilbert Martin   10 years ago

    The Dolezal story sounds like something written by “The Onion”.

    1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      She even named one of her sons ‘Franklin’.

      She tried too hard.

      1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

        Is the other one named “Token”?

        /keepin’ it real, yo

        1. expat   10 years ago

          Ok, THAT was funny!

      2. db   10 years ago

        http://youtu.be/xvgCvT9xX7A

  11. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    NSFW Photos: Smallest Penis In Brooklyn Contest Celebrates Micro Dongs

    Over 100 tiny penis lovers packed into King’s County Bar in Bushwick yesterday afternoon for the third annual Smallest Penis In Brooklyn pageant, a celebration of, well, the title says it all.

    There were considerably more women than men in the crowd for the three hour event, with many small groups of women batched together (photographer Melanie Rieders described it as “a bachelorette girls day vibe”). MC Chicken Bitches welcomed people by reminding them that this event was a celebration of all sizes (but mostly teeny tiny sizes): “If you came here to make fun, you better get the fuck out,” she said, adding that the bar hosts the event to “celebrate what you’ve got,” even if what you’ve got could generously be described as “flyspeck.”

    1. Rich   10 years ago

      “If you came here to make fun, you better get the fuck out.”

      Some of us might enjoy this.

      1. gaijin   10 years ago

        That was pretty extreme man!

        Seriously, that band trolled so many who bought Pornograffitti thinking they were getting an album full of More Than Words.

        1. Rich   10 years ago

          Yep. MTW was, um, atypical.

    2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Someday I will have to make a journey to that strange place. Like an entirely different country.

      1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        It’s like an…

    3. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      Why wasn’t it held in Chinatown?

      1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        C’mon man. Are you not familiar with the effete Brooklyn metrosexual hipster?

        1. Zeb   10 years ago

          Have you been measuring their dicks?

  12. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

    Not exactly a nut punch, but close enough: http://www.postandcourier.com/…..g-incident

    1. SugarFree   10 years ago

      I’m on the officer side in this case.

  13. Rich   10 years ago

    Contest! Who should play Rachel Dolezal in the movie?

    Ima say either Mariah Carrey or Ben Jealous.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      Whoopie Goldberg. Of course.

      Well – or Gwyneth Paltrow.

    2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Lucy Liu?

      1. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

        Seconded

    3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      Angelina Jolie? Or Jay-Lo? Or Melissa McCarthy?

      http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-…..s-stop.php

      1. Rich   10 years ago

        Nice, Rufus!

        I think it’s gonna be tough to beat Angie.

        1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

          She’s a lock because she’s part crazy too.

          And yes, I misspelled J-Lo, I think. Bah humbug.

      2. Zeb   10 years ago

        That’s a dumb list. I can see people being annoyed or offended by some of the blackface and yellowface stuff (though Othello kind of has a tradition of that). I thought race blind casting was supposed to be a good thing now.
        Also probably worth mentioning to the author that many latinos are white people as are Persians (aka Iranians or Aryans).

        And where is Ben Kingsley as Gandhi?

    4. AlmightyJB   10 years ago

      Sideshow Bob

      1. CatoTheChipper   10 years ago

        ^ Winner

        1. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

          Seconded

  14. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    Still, she says she has identified as black since age five.

    I identified as Roy Rogers when I was five, but I got over it.

    1. Slammer   10 years ago

      SCARY GUNZ OMGZ11!!!!

    2. gaijin   10 years ago

      nice!

    3. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      “Yippee Kye Yay, motherfucker….”

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        +1 Nakatomi

    4. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      What, no Trigger warning?

    5. Rich   10 years ago

      LOL

  15. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Live iguana found in toilet, and other surprising tails from the bowl

    Iguanas and snakes and frogs, oh my!

    Those are just some of the critters found in South Florida toilets ? and a Fort Lauderdale family is the latest to learn the call of nature can result in a startling brush with nature.

    “The toilet was clogged, we couldn’t unclog it, so I called a plumber and the plumber brought up an iguana, a live iguana,” said homeowner Marian Lindquist. “But it died.”
    Iguana in the toilet

    Marian and Lily Lindquist and plumber Alisa Scott were shocked to find an iguana blocking the toilet in the Lindquists Fort Lauderdale home (Marian Lindquist, courtesy)

    Such bowl intruders are not that uncommon in South Florida, according to Tim Fallon, vice president of the Broward Chapter of the Florida Association of Plumbing-Gas-Mechanical Inspectors.

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      I think Marian Lundquist is full of shit.

    2. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      Tim Fallon, vice president of the Broward Chapter of the Florida Association of Plumbing-Gas-Mechanical Inspectors.

      That sounds like a legit job.

  16. Longtorso, Johnny   10 years ago

    America’s Most Advanced Climate Station Data Shows US In A 10-Year Cooling Trend
    …Data from America’s most advanced climate monitoring system shows the U.S. has undergone a cooling trend over the last decade, despite recent claims by government scientists that warming has accelerated worldwide during that time.

    The U.S. Climate Reference Network was developed by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) to provide “high-quality” climate data. The network consists of 114 stations across the U.S. in areas NOAA expects no development for the next 50 to 100 years.

    The climate stations use three independent measurements of temperature and precipitation to provide “continuity of record and maintenance of well-calibrated and highly accurate observations,” NOAA states on its website. “The stations are placed in pristine environments expected to be free of development for many decades.” In essence, NOAA chose locations so they don’t need to be adjusted for “biases” in the temperature record.

    1. gaijin   10 years ago

      cool story bro

      1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

        -1 degree

      2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Boo!

    2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      That can’t be true. Why, I was gleefully and repeatedly informed on FB that there was no pause in warming and that those icky climate deniers had been vanquished once and for all.

      1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        It will be true once the Pope gets in on the action and exorcises the climate denier ghosts.

        “The power of Carbon compels you!”

      2. The Last American Hero   10 years ago

        They were vanquished in the sense that Al Queda’s number two was vanquished.

      3. CatoTheChipper   10 years ago

        The Pope himself says there is global warming, and he’s infallible.

        Who are you going to believe? Hard data or the Pope?

    3. Je suis Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Not sure why we spend money on land sensors when we have a satellite network.

      1. Zeb   10 years ago

        Probably because they don’t measure exactly the same thing.

    4. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      In essence, NOAA chose locations so they don’t need to be adjusted for “biases” in the temperature record.

      LOL

    5. Zeb   10 years ago

      I suppose it is entirely possible that North America has cooled while other parts of the world have warmed.

  17. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Juan Williams: Dems should not be losing voting-rights fight

    Even most black Americans ? people who, overwhelmingly, don’t vote Republican ? currently favor new requirements for voters to have photo identification. Three-quarters of all voters ? people of all races and political parties ? favor such laws, according to polls.

    The black support for photo identification of voters can only be described as amazing.

    For most of the twentieth century, violence, poll taxes and literacy tests were used by segregationists to deny black people the right to vote.

    The current state of public opinion, including among the black community, is doubly incredible because there is no evidence of widespread voter fraud anywhere in the nation.

    1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

      There is no evidence because people stalwartly block efforts that might record such evidence.

      1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        “stalwartly?” Does that involve free weights and dungeons?

        1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

          https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/stalwartly

          Not this time, Tonio.

          1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

            I know what it means, UCS, but had just never heard the adjectival form of the word. It’s beautiful in a terrible sort of way, just like you-know-who.

      2. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

        “There is no evidence that anyone has stolen anything from my safe, which I haven’t looked at since I put stuff in it 10 years ago, so I would be crazy to go look and see if it’s still there.”

    2. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      “Why aren’t black people embracing our demagoguery? It’s shocking!”

    3. Rhywun   10 years ago

      The black support for photo identification of voters can only be described as amazing.

      Yeah, why aren’t they following the script?

      1. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

        Juan Williams also fails to acknowledge that there’s no evidence requiring photo ID in any sense ‘suppresses the vote.’ What’s actually going on here is that people reasonably question why you shouldn’t have to show ID to vote when you show ID for tons of other basic activities and the Democrats haven’t managed to explain how requiring an ID to vote is ‘voting suppression’ if requiring ID to rent an apartment isn’t ‘renting suppression.’

        I had to show an ID to rent a car two weekends ago. Why do Democrats allow this? Do they not want black people to be able to rent cars?

        1. JD the elder   10 years ago

          I believe that the standard line is that renting a car is not a fundamental right, whereas voting is. Of course, at this point, the list of fundamental rights seems to be down to speech and voting.

          Frankly I think both sides of this debate are pretty dumb. There’s very little evidence of voter fraud, particularly of the sort that would be affected by voter ID laws, and there is a history of trying to suppress ‘undesirable’ voters. On the other hand, given that you have to have ID to get on a plane, open a bank account, get a drivers license, get married, and pretty much every other damn thing these days, the idea that ID is some kind of monumental imposition to voting is just stupid.

          1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            There’s very little evidence of voter fraud, particularly of the sort that would be affected by voter ID laws,

            Why shouldn’t you be required to verify you are who you say you are when you’re about to do something as important as wield government force against me?

        2. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          As we all know, blacks just don’t have the wherewithal to acquire an ID.

      2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        When did you get back?

    4. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      For most of the twentieth century, violence, poll taxes and literacy tests were used by segregationists to deny black people the right to vote.

      It’s almost as if people don’t see a photo ID as equivalent to these things. Huh.

    5. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      The current state of public opinion, including among the black community, is doubly incredible because there is no evidence of widespread voter fraud anywhere in the nation.

      Yes the inner city precincts in major, Democratically held, cities across the country had 100% of the vote go to Obama. That’s tens of thousands of voters and not even one voted Republican or accidentally hit the wrong button or anything. Yep no fraud. Whatsoever.

    6. Zeb   10 years ago

      For most of the twentieth century, violence, poll taxes and literacy tests were used by segregationists to deny black people the right to vote.

      The change could have something to do with the fact that those things don’t happen much, if at all, anymore. A lot of the rules protecting voting rights for blacks may have been necessary. But they are the sort of thing that should be temporary and only used as necessary. But for some people there will never be any situation where it is OK to stop affirmative action, protected class status and other things that really should (if anything) be temporary measures to correct serious systemic injustices.

    7. Azathoth!!   10 years ago

      The current state of public opinion, including among the black community, is doubly incredible because there is no evidence of widespread voter fraud anywhere in the nation.

      Yes, it’s absolutely incredible that when you don’t look for something–and go out of your way to prevent people from being able to detect that something–that you might not find any of that something.

  18. Slammer   10 years ago

    NSFW

    Naked Wizard guy tased at Coachella

    Alright, so I guess the guy “resisted”, but wasn’t harming anyone that I saw. And gets a huge knee dropped on his gut. That’s when he decides, “I better get away from these violent dudes”, and gets the tase. Why can’t they just let people alone?

    1. Lady Dalrymple   10 years ago

      Watch the lady in the black top check out his micro-penis at :046.

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        micro-penis shamer!

    2. Elspeth Flashman   10 years ago

      Naked Wizard Guy – good band name?

      1. B.P.   10 years ago

        There’s a stoner rock band called Bad Wizard.

  19. Longtorso, Johnny   10 years ago

    US Prosecutor Now Sending Criminal DNA Testing In DC To Lab Run By His Girlfriend
    The U.S. attorney who handles DNA and forensics litigation in the District of Columbia stopped sending cases to the city’s independent forensics lab in January, in favor of a private lab run by his girlfriend….

    1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      See, the system works!

      1. thrakkorzog   10 years ago

        I fail to see how this is any worse than the previous DC lab

    2. Galactic Chipper Cdr Lytton   10 years ago

      While there appears to be no direct financial incentive for Borchardt-Gardner, an intimate relationship shared between a prosecutor and the supervisor of the lab handling evidence in his cases could present a possible conflict of interest.

      Hello, McFly! No direct financial incentive?!? He’s sending work to her lab that they otherwise likely would not have had. No work = no workers. That’s a pretty direct financial incentive.

      Too bad US Attorneys seem to be more interested in hyperbolic woodchippers than prosecuting outright and blatant corruption.

  20. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

    Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.

    So, I wonder if Eddie is going to submit to papal authoritay on this, or go schismatic.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      Schismatic – is that when your palms start to bleed?

      1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Ha! No, that’s stigmata. And I’m only pointing that out because it annoys the bejesus out of Eddie that I’m familiar with the minutiae of his belief system.

        Interestingly, most of the claimed appearances of stigmata on the faithful (yes, an actual thing) have been on the palms, but Romans crucified by nailing through the arm between the radius and ulna, or by tying, since nails through palms wouldn’t support the weight of the body.

        1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

          Thanks for ruining the joke.

          🙂

          1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

            Sorry, bro. Here, have some wood chips.

          2. mad.casual   10 years ago

            Not only did he ruin the joke, he ruined it inaccurately.

            If you’d read the story and understood Pilate and the mob’s request to have the bodies off the cross before Sabbath, you’d know there was no ‘crucifixion standards’ any more than a hanging standards in The Old West.. “Hung on the cross until dead.” is the most accurate general description. The only archaeological example of the practice shows the feet being nailed to the cross. With the feet nailed, the hands are more than sufficient to hold the body weight (especially if the legs remained unbroken, obv.). Further, unless you happen to know the mass of Christ it’s a guess at best.

        2. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

          “it annoys the bejesus out of Eddie that I’m familiar with the minutiae of his belief system.”

          It does?

          I’m not as fascinated with you as you are with me, so I only pay attention to you when I’m actually replying to you.

    2. WTF   10 years ago

      In fairness to Eddie, the Pope is only considered authoritative and infallible on matters of church doctrine, not secular affairs.

      1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        The Pope can tell us the doctrinal consequences of particular scientific facts – that is, *if* we’re facing a climate crisis *then* faithful Catholics and people of good will ought to do such-and-such.

        Although if I read the article correctly he doesn’t go into detailed legislative proposals.

        1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          Although if I read the article correctly he doesn’t go into detailed legislative proposals.

          Instead offers a vague if not just unspoken proposal that the state should plunder and steal in the name of the environment.

          1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

            I’d like to see the final document on this one.

            1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

              When Francis says “do something about climate change”, do you literally think he, of all people, is referring to property rights and inviolable common law protections of said property?

              1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                But if there’s a pending disaster caused by manmade climate change, and carbon emitters are actually contributing to the horrors predicted by the climate change crowd, then yes there should be limitations on property rights. The common law doesn’t let you use your property so as to damage the property of others.

                So it really all comes down to the scientific evidence. Are property owners actually threatening to cause these disasters? From reading Reason commenters, I understand there’s room to disagree.

                But put yourself in the position of someone who believes the predictions. You would be calling for *something* to be done, if only growing some extra-large algae beds.

                1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

                  and carbon emitters are actually contributing to the horrors predicted by the climate change crowd, then yes there should be limitations on property rights.

                  If it is as you describe, then it’s not a limitation on property rights at all since no one has a right to harm the property of others to begin with.

                  The common law doesn’t let you use your property so as to damage the property of others.

                  Which is my entire point. The Pope isn’t pushing for property rights now is he?

                  You would be calling for *something* to be done, if only growing some extra-large algae beds.

                  Well if property rights aren’t worth protecting then your life isn’t worth protecting. You emit methane, you should be killed and there will be a net benefit to the environment.

                  When you abandon principles in order to be practical, bad shit happens.

      2. Old Man With Subpoena   10 years ago

        The Pope should read St. Augustine of Hippo.

        1. Old Man With Subpoena   10 years ago

          Reckless and incompetent expounders of Holy Scripture bring untold trouble and sorrow on their wiser brethren when they are caught in one of their mischievous false opinions and are taken to task by those who are not bound by the authority of our sacred books. For then, to defend their utterly foolish and obviously untrue statements, they will try to call upon Holy Scripture for proof and even recite from memory many passages which they think support their position, although they understand neither what they say nor the things about which they make assertion.

          1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

            I don’t think the problem is how to interpret the Bible, but how to interpret the scientific evidence about the climate situation. If the Pope is misled by the “scientific consensus,” then faithful Catholics are entitled to say so.

            1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

              I mean, there used to be a scientific consensus in favor of the Ptolemaic system.

            2. Old Man With Subpoena   10 years ago

              Now, it is a disgraceful and dangerous thing for an infidel to hear a Christian, presumably giving the meaning of Holy Scripture, talking nonsense on these topics; and we should take all means to prevent such an embarrassing situation, in which people show up vast ignorance in a Christian and laugh it to scorn. The shame is not so much that an ignorant individual is derided, but that people outside the household of faith think our sacred writers held such opinions, and, to the great loss of those for whose salvation we toil, the writers of our Scripture are criticized and rejected as unlearned men.

              1. Old Man With Subpoena   10 years ago

                Context: he was speaking of science.

                1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                  Let me look that up…

                  1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                    Ah, yes, he was criticizing Christians who dogmatized on scientific questions based on debatable interpretations of the book of Genesis. Good thing that doesn’t happen today!

                    But that still allows for “if-then” statements like “if the climate crisis is real and threatens us with hurricanes, devastating floods, etc., *then* there would be a Christian duty to act to stop it.”

                    If the premise is wrong, no worries. If the premise is correct, then the conclusion would be theologically defensible.

              2. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                Yes, indeed, Saint Augustine is spot on.

                But this is about the science.

                If in fact there *were* a climate crisis endangering the planet, then one could argue that the Bible and tradition called on human governments to do something about it based on man’s dominion over the earth. That would be a perfectly valid scriptural interpretation, IMHO.

                1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                  So if there *isn’t* a climate crisis, that wouldn’t invalidate the theological interpretation, just that it’s inapplicable to the current situation.

                2. Old Man With Subpoena   10 years ago

                  But this is about the science.

                  No, it’s about that fucking embarrassment at the Kremli… I mean Vatican, who is happy to expound on shit where he’s clueless. Nice church ya got there.

                  1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

                    The Augustine quote was about people who interpret Genesis as requiring a particular scientific result. Whatever you think about the scientists predicting climate disasters, they are not acting based on Scripture, so the Augustine quotes don’t apply.

      3. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

        And only under specific conditions, which have been considered to have been met only about a dozen times in Church history.

  21. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Clinton campaign bans national pool reporter from N.H. events

    Hillary Rodham Clinton’s presidential campaign Monday banned a representative from the national print pool from attending any of her events in New Hampshire, a development that will make coverage for her trip to New Hampshire spotty for some of the country’s largest print outlets.

    The campaign team for Clinton, who is a former US secretary of state, is not allowing a reporter from the Daily Mail, a London news outlet, to have access to her events. Nick Merrill, a Clinton campaign spokesman, said that the campaign is getting “blowback” from foreign outlets. Foreign outlets have not been granted access to some Clinton events because the campaign wants to give preference to US publications.

    1. WTF   10 years ago

      The foreign outlets don’t carry water for her, so out they go!

    2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      F***ing racist xenophobe!

      Down with Hillary!

    3. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Haven’t RTFA, but couldn’t the pool substitute another reporter? Was it the specific reporter (individual) or did she ban anyone associated with US print media?

    4. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

      What are they going to do if he shows up anyway?

  22. John   10 years ago

    More proof Ronald Reagan really did kick ass. Can you imagine President Urkle doing such a thing?

    http://www.breitbart.com/big-g…..president/

    1. WTF   10 years ago

      Obama would probably manage to shoot himself in the foot.

    2. ThisWoodchipperKillsFascists   10 years ago

      I was surprised it wasn’t a 1911.

      1. CatoTheChipper   10 years ago

        I’m not at all surprised that Reagan was an old-school wheel-gun kind of guy.

  23. Longtorso, Johnny   10 years ago

    Where did two selfless public servants get the money for that?

    White House defends private Prince party
    The White House on Monday defended a private concert over the weekend featuring Prince and Stevie Wonder, saying the Obamas paid for it themselves….

    1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

      From all the money they saved by having their vacations on the public dime!

    2. John   10 years ago

      Rubio buying an $80,000 boat with his own money is just unseemly and shows what a tacky Cuban he really is. The Obamas having a private concert from one of the highest paid and most famous performers in the world is totally okay because they paid for it with their own money.

      Got it.

    3. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      “When asked about the controversy, Stevie Wonder said he didn’t see anything wrong.”

      1. Mr. Anderson   10 years ago

        I heard what you did there.

      2. The DerpRider   10 years ago

        Perhaps he did see it, and just doesn’t care…

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUgngvsWLlE

    4. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Money voluntarily given to small business owner by customers = you didn’t build that.

      Money extracted by force from wage slaves to political overlords = paid for it themselves.

      Man, this doublethink is hard.

      1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

        Don’tcha see, nobody gives up money voluntarily!

    5. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

      “Their own money” = money robbed from American citizens at the point of a gubmint gun.

      Fake scandal, move along…

  24. Longtorso, Johnny   10 years ago

    Where did two selfless public servants get the money for that?

    White House defends private Prince party
    The White House on Monday defended a private concert over the weekend featuring Prince and Stevie Wonder, saying the Obamas paid for it themselves….

    1. WoodchipsandDerp   10 years ago

      Nobody NEEDS more than one musical artist to perform at their private concert

    2. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      “You didn’t book that!”

  25. Fist of Etiquette   10 years ago

    Watch KC Johnson discuss the Amherst College rape case on Megyn Kelly’s show.

    Hercules MKII 3 hours ago
    Megyn’s so hot when she’s pissed.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      I’d still like to micro-aggress her.

      1. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

        repeatedly?

      2. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        Try out for that contest in Brooklyn.

    2. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

      “Megyn’s so hot when she’s pissed.”

      Those last three words could be removed and the statement would be equally true.

      1. Crusty Juggler   10 years ago

        Eh, agree to disagree.

        1. Irish Says Enough Woodchippers   10 years ago

          Your taste in women seriously confuses me.

  26. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    How ISIS came to eclipse al Qaeda

    Fast-forward to today. ISIS, which grew out of Zarqawi’s dissident franchise, is gobbling up market share. Having declared it wants a monopoly on jihadist terror wherever it operates, it recently beheaded 10 members of the Taliban.

    There are many reasons for ISIS’s success. But one crucial factor was President Obama’s decision to pull US troops out of Iraq in 2011. He spent the next few years dismissing it as the “JV team” so he could brag about “decimating” al Qaeda.

    Now that ISIS is encircling Baghdad, the president wants to replicate the surge ? but on the cheap. This week he said he wants to send a few hundred advisers to “stand up National Guard Units to help Sunni communities secure their own freedom from ISIL’s control.”

    1. John   10 years ago

      It is called sending just enough to lose.

    2. ThisWoodchipperKillsFascists   10 years ago

      All the weapons we gave them didn’t hurt. Yay obama!

    3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      “The Surge” was just ethnic cleansing aided by a few extra thousand troops. The US basically let the Shia militias come into town for two days and clear out nearly all the Sunnis by any means necessary. The extra US troops set idly by while this “sectarian violence” spread. The function of the surge was to disguise the ethnic cleansing campaign. The resulting success was because of the military strategy of our political leaders, not because we gave some local militia a blank check to murder thousands of people.

    4. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

      Maybe they’ll start murdering each other in a Crips vs. Bloods-style gang war.

  27. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Obama, Clinton Mocked by Flashing Traffic Sign in Los Angeles

    The conservative artist-provocateur who calls himself Sabo and is known for his campaign poster?style send-ups of Democratic candidates and fundraisers decided to take his act on the road Monday afternoon.

    With both President Barack Obama and 2016 Democratic frontrunner Hillary Clinton scheduled to attend multiple fundraising events in Los Angeles this week, Sabo rented an LED changeable message sign (CMS) Monday afternoon and programmed it with messages such as, “Expect Delays June 18-19,” “Democrats Begging 4 Money.” Other messages included “Blame Tobie [sic] Maguire,” “Blame Chuck Lorre” and “Hillary Back Begging,” among other jibes.

    The artist and his crew towed the flashing sign up the 405 freeway, through Brentwood and over to the Pacific Palisades, where at least two fundraisers will be held later this week.

    1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      That was awesome.

    2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Nice.

  28. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    New England Trip 2015

    I’ve been to 44 states now, although I did not actually get out of my car when I drove through Delaware. To the New England Reasonoids I didn’t visit, no worries. I was moving fast anyway. I like long road trips by myself. Maybe I should be a trucker.

    I went up I-95. Spent about $40 on tolls, including $14 for the George Washington bridge in NYC. Eh, tolls are libertarian.

    In Conneticut, I met a beggar at a rest stop. He said he lived nearby and needed a little bit of money for gas. Questions which came to my mind, but which I did not ask were:

    1. You ran out of gas and money at the same time?

    2. You have no friends or family nearby who can hep you?

    3. You have a car but no credit card?

    Nearby the beginning of his sob story, I put forth my hand and said “not interested”. He said “what does that mean?” I said “I can’t help you.” He said “you can’t or you don’t want to?” I said “I don’t believe you”. He said nothing and I drove away.

    1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

      I stopped by the free Submarine museum in Groton, CT. Tons of fun. I highly recommend it, although I did bang my head on a bulkhead in the USS Nautilus. That is impressive for a guy in the 20th percentile for male height. I asked the Navy guy there about the reactor room. He said it had been defueled and it was off limits for reasons of secrecy.

      I tried to find the Royal Indian Burial ground in RI, but failed. I ate a sandwich there, so I consider the state covered.

      In MA, I visited Cape Cod, Plymouth, and walked the Freedom Trail in Boston. That climb up the Bunker Hill monument was a good work out. I saw the church in that poem about “one if by land and two if by sea”. And I saw the most libertarian warning sign ever:

      WW2 Destroyer
      CAUTION
      Not Modified For Visitor Safety

      In ME, I visited Acadia National Park. It is the most beautiful place I have ever been. The water was very cold. No whales to been seen when I went on the whale watch, but I did see puffins and a seal. I ate lobster next to the bay where they were caught and waved to the fishermen. Glorious! I also got a free beer because I found big typo on the menu.

      1. John   10 years ago

        The old Nautilus is at Groton? Wow. I need to go see that sometime.

        1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

          It’s awesome and the whole museum is free.

      2. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

        That climb up the Bunker Hill monument was a good work out.

        I did a 5k Sunday that started up that hill just before the 3 mile mark. It was a bitch.

      3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

        And I saw the most libertarian warning sign ever:

        Nah. I was once on a road in the Arizona desert and pulled over in this little stone parking lot in the middle of nowhere. I noticed there was a sign about 500 yards away out in the desert and beyond that there was a little patch of trees. So I hiked out to see what this sign said. I got there and it read “Warning; Do Not hike in this area. The Oasis is further than it appears. Beware of dense rattle-snake population”

        So I actually had to hike out to read this sign that tells me not to hike out in the desert because I’ll probably get bitten or die of exposure. That’s the most libertarian sign I’ve ever seen.

    2. Derpetologist   10 years ago

      In NH, I went what’s left of Old Man in the Mountain. They have a special set-up that recreates the original view. I also visited Keene, NH to check up on the free state project. Despite the high concentration of libertarians, the town was not in ruins and the streets were not piled high with corpses and orphans. There were more children playing outside than the other small towns I’ve been in.

      In VT, I visited Karme Choling, a Buddhist retreat. The name has an umlaut, but no one pronounced it. The name means “Tail of the Tiger” in Tibetan. I observed an archery class with those Japanese bows where the top is longer than the bottom. In two volleys, no one hit the target and two arrows landed on the roof of the shed. I give the Buddhists points for training with weapons, although I think they would do better to be more practical.

      In PA, I visited the Army Heritage Museum. I went through a replica of a WWI trench and completed a WWII obstacle course. I also learned why US tanks in the Korean war were painted to look like tigers. 1951 was the year of the tiger, so the US Army though tanks painted like tigers would terrify the Chinese. Actually, it just made the tanks easier to shoot.

      http://platedlizard.blogspot.c…..-trip.html

      1. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        Despite the high concentration of libertarians, the town was not in ruins and the streets were not piled high with corpses and orphans

        OMG! Shocking!

        Here is a fun link:

        Designing Private Cities, Open to All

        Jamshedpur was founded by Tata Steel, as a company town, in 1908. It has landscaped parks, paved roads and even a lake, but it’s no playground for the rich. It’s a working town. Nevertheless, it is the only city in the state of Jharkhand with a sewage treatment plant, and it’s one of the few cities in all of India where residents enjoy reasonably priced, reliable electricity and safe tap water. In a survey by the marketing research company Nielsen, residents ranked the city among the best in India for its cheap and reliable provision of sewage, water, electricity, public sanitation and roads.

        1. 2ndClassProle   10 years ago

          Wait this is lie, only governments can plan communities.

        2. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          But without the government, who would fuck up all the infrastructure and then claim we can’t do without them?

      2. Drake   10 years ago

        If you didn’t eat at Polly’s Pancakes in Sugar Hill, NH, you wasted the whole trip.

      3. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

        Did you just put PA in New England????

        1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

          Oh drat, I did. And Delaware too. I shall go flog myself forthwith.

    3. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      God – you ARE a heartless bastard. You deserve a gold monocle for that act.

      *looks on proudly*

      Yeah – I don’t give money to beggars. Ever. EVER. Did at one time – never again.

      1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        I gave money to lepers and blind people I met in Tanzania. Leprosy and blindness are beggable.

      2. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        I heard a story once of a guy accosted by a beggar. The beggar starts his speech about how he found Jesus and is turning his life around, but the guy interrupts and says:

        “Look, I’ll give you $20 right now if you promise to spend it on alcohol. Pray with me now: in the name of Jack Daniel’s, amen.”

      3. Rich   10 years ago

        “The guy said he hadn’t had a bite in days, so I bit him.”

    4. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

      3. You have a car but no credit card?

      This is actually fairly common. You didn’t grow up working poor, did you? Of course, 1, and 2 are red flags if he ‘lives nearby’.

      1. Derpetologist   10 years ago

        This guy looked to be in his mid 40s.

      2. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

        What libertarian has grown up working poor?

        *sneers so much that his monocle drops out*

        1. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

          I did.

          The idea that the working poor don’t have credit cards doesn’t match what I saw at all. Now, if it turned out his credit card was maxed out, I might be more likely to believe that.

          1. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

            In reality I wasn’t raised poor – but I got very little financial support from my family. I was expected to go and make my own way in the world. I worked washing dishes, did warehouse work, and a few stints in the screenprinting trade. The one thing I learned from those days that being poor sucks.

    5. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      Pretty much when they start arguing or bargaining it’s a sign they’re a professional beggar. Once you say no, just walk away.

      1. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Oh, rest stops are notorious places for aggressive panhandlers.

    6. Protagoronus   10 years ago

      Anybody that wants to pull their car off the road in Delaware is welcome to light the ole’ Protagoronus signal and grab a beer with me at the Twin Lakes Brewery.

    7. crab_apple   10 years ago

      It’s ok, no one gets out in Delaware. Unless you are about to enter New Jersey because I’ll be damned if anyone else is pumping my damn gas.

  29. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

    Finally a bit,of Justice in this case: http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..kindle-app

    1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

      FTA: But both were convicted of giving misleading statements to the FBI and face up to 20 years in prison. Croley was convicted of both counts against her ? filing a false report and violating Parrish’s right to a fair trial by withholding exculpatory evidence. She faces a 20-year sentence on the first count and one year for the second.

      Withholding exculpatory evidence is only punishable by a year in prison? Jesus, no wonder so many cops don’t seem to give a fuck about handing evidence to defense attorneys.

      You’d think a person could run on just that issue (reforming the sentencing for that crime to 20 years to life) in many urban areas in America and would win in a landslide.

      1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        If that person was a Republican, he might get as much as 20% of the black vote – maybe even 25%!

        1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          Well, seeing as I’m not a republican I don’t really care. A libertarian, especially a black one, that ran on that platform against a white democrat whose campaign has been financed by the police union for the last seven election cycles might actually win.

          1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

            There may be a sea change in the black community, like their previous shift to the Democrats. It may take some time, though. Until it happens, it’s Democrats all the way down.

            1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

              Seriously, the best chance a pro-justice candidate would have would be to register Democrat and win the primary, then (s)he is set.

              1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

                Lets not pretend there is some nuance to gaining the black vote. They vote for Democrats and quite nearly only Democrats because of social pressures from outside and within their communities.

      2. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

        Yeah, and that one-year maximum sentence is kind of a fail-safe since we all know cops are rarely charged, and are prosecuted ineffectively in those rare cases where they are. One year is the minimum threshold for felony sentencing, FWIW.

    2. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      “From day one I have been in this,” Parrish said. “It’s surely not about putting somebody in prison or giving somebody a charge they didn’t deserve, but right is right. Somebody has to stand up at some point for justice.”

      That was some story.

      PoliceOne and conservatives with law & order boners are indignant.

  30. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Rachel Dolezal to Matt Lauer: “This is not some freak, ‘Birth of a Nation,’ mockery blackface performance”

    Lauer asked when she started openly “deceiving” people about her race, and she took exception to the question. “It was a little more complex than me identifying as black,” she said, before saying that newspapers began referring to her as “trans-racial” and “bi-racial” early in her career, and she never corrected them.

    “Why didn’t you correct them if you knew it wasn’t true?” Lauer asked.

    “It’s more complex than it being true or false in that particular instance,” she replied.

    Dolezal claimed that she doesn’t darken her skin, she merely doesn’t “stay out of the sun.” Lauer asked if what she did is akin to “blackface,” and read a quotation from the Washington Post’s Jonathan Capehart, who wrote that “blackface remains highly racist, no matter how down with the cause a white person is.”

    “This is not some freak, ‘Birth of a Nation,’ mockery blackface performance,” she said. “This is on a very real, connected level.” She added that she’s had to “live the experience,” especially after she gained custody of her adopted brother. “I couldn’t be perceived as white and be Isaiah’s mother,” she said.

    1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      “It’s more complex than it being true or false in that particular instance”

      No it’s not, you lying, self-absorbed cunt.

    2. Slammer   10 years ago

      It’s more complex than it being true or false

      Sigh.

    3. Rich   10 years ago

      “It’s more complex than it being true or false”

      Well, more complex than it being black or white.

      1. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

        Heh.

        She’s a nutjob and a deceiver, but it is absolutely delicious watching them reap what they have sown.

    4. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

      I suspect she’s wearing the makeup which is designed for and marketed to black women. This makeup is compatible with darker colored skin. I once met a white lesbian with a black partner and the white woman used that makeup and achieved much the same effect as Dolezal.

    5. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      “I couldn’t be perceived as white and be Isaiah’s mother,” she said.

      Could it be that blacks, who cannot be racist ever, would somehow resent you raising one of their tribe?

    6. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

      Why would she have custody of her adopted brother if their parents are still around?

    7. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

      But still no answers on that hair? How did she get that hair????

      1. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

        Bride of Blackenstein

  31. Certified Public Asshat   10 years ago

    DuClaw’s Sweet Baby Jesus beer pulled from shelves of Ohio grocery chain

    Benfield said this is the first time the beer has been pulled from a chain of stores, but not the first time it’s generated complaints.
    “When you push boundaries and try to get one group excited about it, inevitably people are going to get upset on one side or the other,” Benfield said.
    The name Sweet Baby Jesus was chosen after a test batch tasting of the winning recipe of a home brew contest held by DuClaw. Another name had been tentatively assigned ? Benfield couldn’t remember the test name ? but the brewmaster didn’t think it fully captured the consumer’s reaction at first taste.
    “We liked the phrase [Sweet Baby Jesus], which at least to us, is a phrase of excitement or astonishment,” Benfield said.

    1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      “Another name had been tentatively assigned ? Benfield couldn’t remember the test name”

      It was probably “holy crap, this tastes awful!”

    2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      I have seen billboards for this in Utah, and needless to say, it pointedly mocks the dominant community there.

    3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      What are we, Muslims? It’s Jesus on a beer bottle get over it. South Park had Jesus murdering people and probably having gay sex or something. No one is forcing you to buy the beer.

    4. All-Seeing Woodchipper   10 years ago

      Pairs wonderfully with christ-on-a-cracker chips.

  32. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

    Libertarianism: Basically Stalinism

    Libertarianism has a complicated history, and it is by and large a sordid one. Its leading 20th-century theorist was the novelist Ayn Rand, who, for all her talk of freedom, was an authoritarian at heart. She was intolerant of dissent and conspiratorial to a fault. Libertarians elected to public office on the basis of her ideas, including former Republican Representative Ron Paul, Rand Paul’s father, have adhered to such radical positions as abolishing the Federal Reserve.

    […]

    For libertarianism is among the most rigid of modern ideologies. The theorists who formulated its core principles were seekers after political purity. They created an ideal world designed to work perfectly ? but only if human beings acted consistently. Society, to them, was like a Swiss watch: Let every part play its designed role, and the whole thing would run on its own accord.

    Libertarianism in that sense is not merely an economic doctrine or a political worldview. It proposed, as Ayn Rand realized, a secular substitute for religion, complete with its own conception of the city of God, a utopia of pure laissez-faire and the city of man, a place where envy and short-sightedness hinder creative geniuses from carrying out their visions. If there was anything its founders hated more than governmental authority, it was religious authority.

    1. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

      Such a religious-like ideal requires careful scrutiny to ensure that no one breaks the rules or, in religious terms, commits a sin. Individuals are free to act in their self-interest ? indeed, are required to ? but if they grow lazy or are swayed by emotions or altruism, society’s best achievements will come crashing down around them.

      Libertarianism, in short, resonates with an avid quest for political purity. The ideas of both conservatives and liberals are flexible enough to give way, at least on occasion. Obama, for example, regularly advocates compromise in principle, and conservatives, who do not, nonetheless fight frequently with each other. Those associated with libertarianism have no such room to maneuver; those who disagree are treated like apostates.

      Yet if libertarianism is principled, it is also an impracticable set of ideas. Republicans who want to increase the defense budget can, and do, get results. Democrats who sought national health insurance finally realized their objective after decades of trying. But how, exactly, does one get government “interference” out of business when business wants it there most of the time? Is a libertarian foreign policy even imaginable, let alone workable? Truly principled libertarians believe that government should refrain from telling women what to do with their bodies, but should there be no regulation of medical procedures?

      This guy is a professor of political science at a major college.

      1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

        He sure set that straw man alight. Never seen flames rise so high into the sky.

      2. Raven Nation   10 years ago

        So much crap in so few paragraphs. I wonder what the purpose of these kinds of posts are?

        1. Rhywun   10 years ago

          I wonder what the purpose of these kinds of posts are?

          Pretty obviously, to make sure the sheep don’t stray.

          1. Raven Nation   10 years ago

            I guess. The statists must be getting worried.

            1. Rhywun   10 years ago

              Nah, it’s just boilerplate scaremongering. A college professor can churn this stuff out in his sleep.

      3. sarcasmic   10 years ago

        Truly principled libertarians believe that government should refrain from telling women what to do with their bodies, but should there be no regulation of medical procedures?

        Wow. I can almost see the guy smugly sitting back in his chair feeling like he’s pointed out some great contradiction, where there actually is none. What a dope.

        1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          I have never heard a substantive critique of libertarianism come from non-libertarians. Quite nearly 100% of what you hear is the author thinking he’s pointed out some great logical inconsistency or failure of reason in our libertarian thought. When in fact all that author has done is demonstrate how little he understands. The quality of these critiques against libertarianism is measured by how well the author utilizes sophistry to hide his own bareass ignorance.

          1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

            When someone feels that freedom means asking permission and obeying orders, the concept of liberty simply does not compute.

            When someone supports social justice, as in using the government to commit crimes on their behalf, the concept of actual justice simply does not compute.

            When someone supports ideas based upon who argues them, not the merit of the ideas themselves, then they will never understand arguments from principle.

          2. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

            If I choose to disclose to someone I’ve newly met that I’m a libertarian, they always – always – proceed to tell me what I believe.

        2. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

          But it is not a contadiction when abortion is apparrently the only medical procedure that should not be regulated?

      4. 2ndClassProle   10 years ago

        Why do they only speak of Rand? Out of the Holy Matriarchal Trinity, I prefer Paterson and Lane more than Rand.

        1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

          Ayn Rand was a terrible person. This makes all of her ideas wrong. For example she took advantage of Medicare and Social Security. That right there invalidates all of her ideas. Duh.

          1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

            I never understood the ‘yeah well conservatives really love their SS, right?’ angle. No kidding, they were forced to participate and pay into it. What do they expect they do, refuse the cheques?

            1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

              What do they expect they do, refuse the cheques?

              Yes. That is exactly what they expect them to do. They’re supposed to refuse all benefits, not use public roads, quit their job if they work for the government or for a contractor, and still pay taxes to pay for it all.

            2. lap83   10 years ago

              I think their motive is to actually see if they can guilt conservatives into giving the checks back.

              1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

                The same sophistry is applied to universal health care. If you criticize it you will inevitably be told ‘but it’s nice to have it when you need it though, right?’

                I never asked for it and if I was consulted I would have voted against it. That the tyranny of the majority ruled and prevailed in the matter doesn’t detract from the fact a) the quality can stink and b) isn’t proof we’ve come to like it over time thanks to their wisdom.

          2. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

            She’s got to be the only person that proggies criticize for using their sacred programs.

            Or do they think that everyone on SS and Medicare are horrible people?

            1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

              Anyone who criticizes government is a bad person, especially if they take advantage of the things they pay for with their taxes.

              1. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

                They see it as reneging on a bribe (though they would never express it in those terms).

          3. Tonio the Plant Fiber Shredder   10 years ago

            ^This (Sarc @9:44)

        2. Raven Nation   10 years ago

          If you’re going to dismiss philosophy based on those who come up with them, then let’s start with Rousseau and Marx.

          1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

            They had the correct philosophy, so that argument doesn’t count on them. Principals, not principles.

      5. Je suis Woodchipper   10 years ago

        This guy is a professor of political science at a major college.

        That Boston College considers this person fit to teach political science, which typically includes comparative economics, tells me that Boston College doesn’t give a shit about its political science program.

        Stalinism is that transition to communism where you centralize everything and kill all the detractors. And yet this guy thinks it resembles a philosophy that maximizes individual liberty. Laughably absurd.

      6. JD the elder   10 years ago

        So the guy writes an article on how Ayn Rand is at the heart of the libertarian movement without bothering to look up her actual views on libertarians? That’s like starting your speech by standing up and screaming “I HAVE NOT DONE EVEN FIVE SECONDS OF RESEARCH ON THIS”.

    2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      Blathering Article’s Summary:

      Freedom is slavery

    3. Warty   10 years ago

      This guy is doing an amazing Tulpa impression.

    4. MJGreen - Docile Citizen   10 years ago

      Its leading 20th-century theorist was the novelist Ayn Rand

      LOL. Great opening.

  33. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    11 ways white America avoids taking responsibility for its racism

    if we are well-intended and do not consciously dislike people of color, we cannot be racist. This is why it is so common for white people to cite their friends and family members as evidence of their lack of racism. However, when you understand racism as a system of structured relations into which we are all socialized, you understand that intentions are irrelevant. And when you understand how socialization works, you understand that much of racial bias is unconscious. Negative messages about people of color circulate all around us. While having friends of color is better than not having them, it doesn’t change the overall system or prevent racism from surfacing in our relationships. The societal default is white superiority and we are fed a steady diet of it 24/7. To not actively seek to interrupt racism is to internalize and accept it.

    As part of my work I teach, lead and participate in affinity groups, facilitate workshops, and mentor other whites on recognizing and interrupting racism in our lives. As a facilitator, I am in a position to give white people feedback on how their unintentional racism is manifesting. This has allowed me to repeatedly observe several common patterns of response. The most common by far is outrage:

    1. John   10 years ago

      As part of my work I teach, lead and participate in affinity groups, facilitate workshops, and mentor other whites on recognizing and interrupting racism in our lives. As a facilitator, I am in a position to give white people feedback on how their unintentional racism is manifesting. This has allowed me to repeatedly observe several common patterns of response. The most common by far is outrage:

      There is trouble here is River City and its pool, I mean the RACISM. I have got some instruments I can sell you that will keep your children on the straight and narrow.

      What a carnival barker.

      1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        That’s about the size of it.

      2. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

        What the flying creeping fuck is an “affinity group”?

    2. Longtorso, Johnny   10 years ago

      that intentions are irrelevant

      Unless it is the prog’s intentions, which are all important.

      The most common by far is outrage:

      I called him a racist. That angered him, thus proving he is a racist.

      1. WTF   10 years ago

        Well, yeah. I called someone a sheep-fucker. That angered him, thus proving he is a sheep-fucker.

    3. WTF   10 years ago

      “The societal default is white superiority and we are fed a steady diet of it 24/7. “

      No, it isn’t, and we are actually fed the exact opposite 24/7. But don’t let reality get in the way of your agenda.

    4. Raven Nation   10 years ago

      The civil rights version of mission creep.

  34. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    The black support for photo identification of voters can only be described as amazing.

    For most of the twentieth century, violence, poll taxes and literacy tests were used by segregationists to deny black people the right to vote.

    Talk abut a non sequitur…

    1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

      Voter ID is a Republican plot to deny the vote to black people. Even a free photo ID requires getting off one’s ass and going someplace to get it, and that’s the same as a tax. Duh. Everyone knows this.

      1. WTF   10 years ago

        Since you don’t believe that black people are uniquely unable to perform the simple task of getting a free photo ID, you are clearly a racist.

        1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

          How do blacks buy their menthol cigarettes and forty ouncers of malt liquor without photo ID?

          *ducks and runs*

          1. WTF   10 years ago

            Also, fried chicken?

            1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

              BAM! THAT’S what I’m talkin’ ’bout.

      2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

        Even a free photo ID requires getting off one’s ass and going someplace to get it

        Sounds like an individual mandate to me. Isn’t that something that progs love with Obamacare?

      3. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

        The argument they make is that it is still a form of a poll tax because one must take time from work to get the ID and must also pay for a birth certificate necessary to obtain the photo ID. So what is the solution, because to win this fight in the media those,problems must be resolved in order to take the complaints away.

        Propose laws that say a birth certificate will be sent for free once a year for anybody requesting one to obtain a valid state identification. And that that state ID can be ordered online (free computers at public libraries) or that state DMV’s issuing the IDs are to remain open from 8 am to 9 pm six days a week by spreading their current staffing out over that time period.

        Seriously, people. We cannot win this argument on the merits of “Voter IDs stop fraud” when the other side’s entire argument hinges on “they want to make it hard for blacks to vote”. The only way to win is to eliminate their arguments completely while still making universal voter ID a real thing.

        1. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

          You,will,also see the added benefit of forcing the DMV to be open when people can go there without being inconvenienced. Which would be a good sell to everybody except the people that work at the DMV.

          1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

            Non-day shift work has an automatic pay bump in at least the contract I work under, so even if staffing stays constant, cost could still go up. (not counting utilities).

        2. 2ndClassProle   10 years ago

          It is justification for their failed progressive policies. When they start loosing elections, it will not be the platform, but because of oppression.

        3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          If anyone is so fucking stupid that getting a valid ID is too hard for them, especially considering that it’s done in order to wield government force against others, then they don’t deserve to be able to vote to say the least.

        4. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

          Seriously, people. We cannot win this argument on the merits of “Voter IDs stop fraud” when the other side’s entire argument hinges on “they want to make it hard for blacks to vote”.

          Except that 75+% of the population thinks that voter id laws are a good idea.

          The argument they make is that it is still a form of a poll tax because one must take time from work to get the ID …

          And they needed the id to get the job, or take government benefits.

          1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

            And they needed the id to get the job, or take government benefits.

            Or buy booze. Or buy cigarettes. Or drive/register/buy/rent a car. Or fly on an airplane. Or open a bank account. Or get married. Or rent a room. Or buy certain cold medicine. Or buy a gun. Or get a hunting/fishing license. Or pick up a prescription. Or write a check. Or use a credit card. Or donate blood. Or go to the doctor. Or go to school. Or get a library card. Or pawn something. Or get water/electricity hooked up to your residence.

            But not to vote.

          2. sloopyinTEXAS   10 years ago

            Except that 75+% of the population thinks that voter id laws are a good idea.

            Sure, but there aren’t than many single issue voters on this issue alone. So we need to see how much of that 25% we can capture by eliminating their argument. A swing of just. 2-3% could be enough to completely swing elections while having the added benefit of eliminating some actual voter fraud in the process, which could result in as much as a 8-10% swing in areas that have recently received over 100% voter turnout.

          3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            -I have to spend money on gas to drive to my polling station which is out in the country. Poll tax!

            -I’m not allowed to vote naked, so I have to spend money buying clothing to vote. Poll tax!

            -I’m required by the laws of nature to consume some amount of calories to walk into the polling booth and push a button. Poll tax!

            If you took this logic to it’s conclusion, literally everything is a poll tax.

  35. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    You knew it was coming: black trans woman explains that you can’t be trans racial, because race has a biological basis and gender does not.

    http://everydayfeminism.com/20…..ansracial/

    1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      It’s come to this.

      I quietly push my woodchipper around town now.

    2. John   10 years ago

      Genetics are just a lie told by the patriarchy.

      1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

        Race is a social construct, it ain’t real man. But ‘racism’ is a thing all white people are born with and can only be eradicated with government enforced privileges on the basis of race, this thing that I just said doesn’t exist.

        1. John   10 years ago

          The funny thing is that race and ethnicity really is a social construct. We are all the same biologically regardless of our race. Indeed, some of the most vicious and genocidal ethnic conflicts in the world are among groups that are racially identical. Bosnians and Serbs look just alike and so do Turks and Greeks and a whole lot of other people with historical and bitter hatreds for each other. What makes someone “black’ is not their skin tone, as this woman proved. What makes them black is them calling themselves that.

          Everything they say about gender is actually true about race. Yet, because there seems to be a law of physics that everything they say and think must be the opposite of the truth, they claim that gender is the construct and race is the genetics.

          1. Ivan Pike   10 years ago

            The funny thing is that race and ethnicity really is a social construct. We are all the same biologically regardless of our race.

            So how do haplogroups relate to all this? Do they specify a specific “race” or something else?

            1. John   10 years ago

              What is a “race” is totally arbitrary. Why are Kenyans considered black but lighter skinned Arabs not? Because that is what society decided. There is nothing to say a light skinned Arab isn’t black, if that is what society decided. Think about the Zimmerman “white Hispanic” thing. Zimmerman’s skin tone is white but his family or at least part of it is from Mexico. There are Mexicans who are lighter skinned than many “white” people in America. Are they not Hispanics? Maybe depending on how you define the term, which is completely arbitrary.

              Sex in contrast is not arbitrary. You either are XX or XY. You can’t be sort of one or the other. It is a biological fact not a social construct like race.

              1. Ivan Pike   10 years ago

                John

                Looks like the squirrels ate my post, so I try again.

                From the phenotype level, race can be difficult to determine, even arbitrary as you say. My question is really at the genotype level. As sex is either XX or XY, would race be the haplogroup that you carry in your DNA.

                n=60
                C=0
                Q=80.0
                R1=11.7
                Others=8.3

                This is the haplogroup for Inuit. Could someone have the same mixture of haplogoups and NOT be Inuit?

                1. John   10 years ago

                  The problem is deeper than that. Male and female have objective meanings. Each is a set of genes that about half of the population shares and determines whether you can bear children and what range of height and strength you will be. That is an objective definition. Does that mean that women can’t wear combat boors or men can’t wear dresses and makeup? No. Other than child birth, gender roles are social constructs but gender itself is not.

                  Race in contrast is somewhat objective. You are right that someone who is genetically an Inuit is different than someone who is a Slav. The problem is that you can be both. I can have some Slav and some Inuit. I can’t have some male and some female. I am one or the other. So what it means to be of this or that race and who actually is that is totally arbitrary. If you go back far enough everyone has some kind of black African ancestry. So are they “black”? If not, then how close does the ancestry have to be? It seems to me the answer to that question is totally arbitrary.

                  1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

                    So if I describe a black person to you, you wouldn’t know what I’m talking about? If I said I was an Eskimo, do you imagine I’d have blonde hair and green eyes? There is quite clearly a difference between myself and a Sub-Saharan African. Our ancestors evolved different phenotypes and indeed different genotypes. I digest milk and dairy products quite well for instance. I don’t have any predilection towards sickle cell anemia. I don’t have any chance of passing on Tay Sachs disease to my children et cetera.

                    Race is certainly a man-made construct. Just like differentiating a squirrel from a rat is technically a man-made construct. Yes phenotypes are a poor basis to classify people, but ethnicity and race are as real as other abstract concepts like “horse” or “dog”. Nature doesn’t classify things on it’s own, the human mind does that. The rational mind does that.

                    1. John   10 years ago

                      So if I describe a black person to you, you wouldn’t know what I’m talking about?

                      Sure I would. But that just makes your description comprehensible. It doesn’t make it any less arbitrary. Under the old Apartheid system ethnic Indians were considered “black” and treated just like black Africans. Was that “wrong”? Well morally sure but not semantically. What is “black” is whatever you decide it is. Again, is a person who is 10% black back in the same sense as someone who is 95%? If so, why? Since you can be two or even three or more races at once, what constitutes a “race” is in practice completely arbitrary and a social construct.

                    2. Warty   10 years ago

                      “Race” is and always was nothing more than tribal affiliation. Attempts to systematize it, biologically or otherwise, are always doomed to be nonsense.

                    3. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

                      Since you can be two or even three or more races at once, what constitutes a “race” is in practice completely arbitrary and a social construct.

                      Of course race is a social construct. People always say that like it’s some profound wisdom. “Horse” and “Zebra” are man-made constructs too. Let’s disparage those concepts and pretend they are morally and logically invalid too.

                    4. Azathoth!!   10 years ago

                      ‘Race’ is the word used to describe the semi-speciated breeds of human. It is not arbitrary. A great amount of racial information can be gleaned from the visual inspection of a single bone.

                      The fact that hybridization is possible does not, in any way, undermine the non-arbitrary nature of race.

                      All of the ‘race is a social construct’ dogma is designed to make it seem that light skinned caucasians from the European region created the idea of ‘race’ so that they could declare themselves the ‘superior’ race.

              2. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

                John,

                Bringing Hispanic into the discussion just confuses things more as it is technically a broad cultural identifier, but one that is colloquilly used as equivalent to racial identifiers. It seems to me as an Anthropological exercise there is some use in speaking of race in termS of more closely related branches of the human species and it migratory and evolutionary history.

    3. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

      “Gender does not”

      Ha….haha….hah……hahahahaha……

      hahahahaaaaaaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      *breath*

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

      1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

        (OK,”sex” vs “gender”, etc. etc.

        WHAT. EVER.)

        1. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

          Pretty simple, just make up some new word that means “race, but solely in the mind of that own individual” and claim that it’s 1) different from “race” and 2) important.

          1. SugarFree   10 years ago

            Trueskin

            1. lap83   10 years ago

              That sounds perverted

              1. SugarFree   10 years ago

                Only if you rub the lotion on it.

                1. Al-WoodChippin-manian   10 years ago

                  Go on….

          2. Rich   10 years ago

            make up some new word that means “race, but solely in the mind of that own individual”

            “She’s comfortable in her OWNSKIN.”

    4. WTF   10 years ago

      I bet she Fucking Loves Science, too.

    5. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      “race has a biological basis and gender does not.”

      Why “gender” and not “sex”? Because “gender” was a term developed to describe cultural factors about what sex you identify with.

      So once we get a word to describe identifying with another race, we’ll be set.

      1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        I see that Auric beat me to it.

    6. lap83   10 years ago

      “because race has a biological basis and gender does not.”

      So a black man and black woman have more in common than a black woman and a white woman?
      I think I have heard that line of thinking before….I don’t know where, or from whom….

  36. Rich   10 years ago

    Prince gave a private VIP performance at the White House on Saturday night to celebrate African-American Music Appreciation Month.

    Also there: … former Attorney General Eric Holder, Education Secretary Arne Duncan and National Security Adviser Susan Rice. First daughters Sasha and Malia were also at the show, we’re told. In one showstopping number, Prince introduced Wonder to the stage and the pair sang “Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours” for grooving guests.

    Your tax dollars at play.

    1. WTF   10 years ago

      No, they claim the Obamas paid the tab themselves. Somehow.

      1. Rich   10 years ago

        Oh. I take full responsibility for the error.

      2. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

        Just like how they were miraculously able to afford a two million dollar mansion in Hawaii on Barack’s 50k salary at a job he had only worked at for 4 years at the point he bought the place. Actually come to think of it, I think “a friend” bought him the mansion but I’m sure there was no quid pro quo…

        1. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

          He got down payment assistance.

    2. Je suis Woodchipper   10 years ago

      just so long as Wu Tang didn’t perform. they were drafted by the Chinese.

  37. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    One last Salon:

    Hillary Clinton, fighter: Why her new approach is an attack on a destructive American myth

    As the Times notes, Clinton’s decided she’s better off embracing Obama’s legacy than running from it, so it’s unlikely she’d ever publicly make her argument in these terms. But by trying to brand herself as a tough, scrappy and indefatigable fighter, Clinton is in some ways returning to the fundamental philosophical difference between herself and then-Senator Obama. And she’s saying that time and experience have shown that Obama was wrong. America doesn’t need a reconciler; it needs a president who can simply get things done ? with or without a fight.

    That assessment, I believe, is correct. And it’s a testament to Clinton’s intellect and political savvy, her being able to recognize that outcomes are what matter to voters, not process. Even if her analysis is sound, however, the “fighter” strategy still must confront one big question and must defeat one big myth. The question is whether the Obama years have taught Americans that their politics is broken because of structure, not individual politicians. And the myth is that there are “common-sense” solutions we could all agree upon, if only vulgar and venal politicians would get out of the way ? or fall in line.

    1. John   10 years ago

      She is fighting the fight for all the fighters out there or something. Exactly what she is fighting for or what she has ever fought for beyond her husband’s ability to lay interns and her ability to stuff her bank account is unclear.

    2. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

      Obama the reconciler? Ha.

    3. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      ‘that outcomes are what matter to voters, not process.’

      Well, to be fair, we do enjoy a smoked sausage sammich, no?

    4. Raven Nation   10 years ago

      And the myth is that there are “common-sense” solutions we could all agree upon

      This I agree with.

    5. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      She has dodged Bosnian sniper bullets, alright?

      What part of “Hillary is a fighter” do you not understand?

    6. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

      Do people actually still believe politicians ‘fight’ for them?

      How infantile as it is retarded.

      Yeah, Hillary (and Obama of course) is fighting for you – YOU – Mr. and Mrs. Middle-Class Shmuck.

      Get outta here.

    7. Je suis Woodchipper   10 years ago

      so gridlock. works for me.

    8. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

      When has Obama been a reconciler? His attitude has always been “I won the election, do as I demand”. See how he treated the Obamacare vote and lawsuits, and how he did not need even the fig leaf of a Congressional authorization of force against Libya.

  38. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

    “Still, she says she has identified as black since age five.”

    So forgive my fraudulent behavior and where’s my book deal, suckas!?

  39. Ken Shultz   10 years ago

    “Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.”

    Ecology really is more like a religion than anything else, and I don’t necessarily mean that as an insult.

  40. TheZeitgeist   10 years ago

    Pope Francis seems to be gearing up for a major push on the moral necessity of confronting climate change.

    Everyone knows the Catholic Church is a peerless authority on geophysics with an irreproachable track record on such subjects going back centuries.

    1. John   10 years ago

      Maybe the Vatican can start trying climate skeptics. They can have show trials for anything who objects to church approved science. Too bad the Pope is serious and not just trolling. If he were trolling, he would have such trials and watch the entire “I fucking love science” crowd have orgasms in praise of it. That would be some first class trolling.

    2. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

      Because poor people need carbon taxes and less manufacturing jobs

    3. gaijin   10 years ago

      I see a little silhouetto of a man,
      Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango?
      Thunderbolt and lightning,
      Very, very frightening me.
      (Galileo) Galileo.
      (Galileo) Galileo,
      Galileo Figaro
      Magnifico.

      1. Mickey Rat   10 years ago

        The Church was supporting the scientific consensus at the time as well (Galileo just demonstrated that some of the Ptolemaic Theory’s assumptions were wrong, but the Copernican model could not accurately describe planetary motion before Kepler’s insight on the shape of orbits).

    4. sarcasmic   10 years ago

      Listening to NPR on the drive to work this morning they said that the pope once studied chemistry, which means he knows more about science than any of his denier critics.

      1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

        I listened to NPR a while back when they were doing a profile on “Missy Elliot” and making the case that her hit single “My Milk Shakes Brings All the Boys to The Yard” is the song of a generation and that it’s lyrical qualities typify the black experience…. blah blah blah… racism.

        The point is that NPR is so full of smug shit I can’t even put into words how terrible their reporting is. But of course Pope Francis is a chemist/climatologist, last year this time I believe he was a world renowned economist. He’s really the perfect Pope for the modern progressive age. Like a regular poor person he rides the bus, wears humble clothing and is a total moron about money and finance. He also knows all of the most ignorant buttons to push while complaining about what he calls ‘capitalism’. It just doesn’t get any better.

        1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

          The point is that NPR is so full of smug shit I can’t even put into words how terrible their reporting is.

          With regards to anything related to politics and economics, I agree. But they do do some good work when they’re not shilling for Marxists. That and they don’t go to commercial every eight minutes.

          1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            Even their economic commentary is sometimes unintentionally illuminating. For instance, I first learned that the medical industry’s procedures pricing is almost entirely centrally planned by a conspiracy of medicaid, medicare and the AMA. Now of course NPR was not describing the price fixing system as a bad thing, they thought it was good and the narrator was scratching his head as to why it doesn’t work all that well. And in conclusion they posited that if we had more central planning power in the hands of bureaucrats and technocrats, it would work even more betterer.

            Now they were 95% backasswards stupid in their reporting, but I still learned something. So I will give NPR a little bit of credit. But I still would relish the thought of Kai Rysdaal losing his tax grants and getting put out on his ass along with the rest of them.

        2. Galactic Chipper Cdr Lytton   10 years ago

          Uh, wasn’t that Kelis, not Missy Elliot?

          1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            Same thing

          2. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

            All female rappers look alike to me.

  41. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

    Five minutes of Gameplay from new Star Wars Battlefront game

  42. Slammer   10 years ago

    New Mot?rhead

    Sounds good.

  43. Rich   10 years ago

    Some of Clinton’s Libya emails said to be withheld from Benghazi Committee

    “We provided the Committee with a subset of documents that matched its request and will continue to work with them going forward.”

    Why are these clowns not slapped with a subset of contempt charges?

    1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      Because the contempt charges would be coming from the same political institution they’ve headed up, the same institution they use for their advantage and the same institution that favors their ilk above the rest of us proles at every turn. If the state is to monopolize justice, you can expect this.

      1. Rich   10 years ago

        Ah. Well, they *did* say “We will continue to work with them going forward.”

  44. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

    U.S. drone strikes killed Al Qaeda’s leader in Yemen.

    I’m sure that means Al Qeada is defeated and they won’t be a problem anymore. Right?

    1. Raven Nation   10 years ago

      I’m pretty sure the current drone strikes are just mopping up (like those Japanese soldiers in the jungle decades after 1945) because, you know, Osama bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive.

  45. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

    Scientists rally around Nobel Prize winner who lost job over sexist comments

    The British scientist resigned from several positions after telling an audience in Korea last week that women should work in segregated labs because “[men] fall in love with them, they fall in love with [men] and when you criticize them, they cry.” He apologized for the comments but stood by his claim that men falling in love with women in labs is “disruptive to the science.” The backlash on social media, however, forced him to resign from his honorary professorship at University College London and his positions at the Royal Society and the European Research Council (ERC) days later.

    Hunt conceded in an interview with The Observer that his comments were “inexcusable,” but also claimed that they were misinterpreted. He told The Observer that he made them in “a totally jocular, ironic way,” and he feels that the authorities that pushed him to quit handled the situation unfairly.

    “I have been hung to dry by academic institutes who have not even bothered to ask me for my side of affairs,” he said.

    London mayor Boris Johnson came to Hunt’s defense in an op-ed for The Telegraph on Sunday, saying that research shows women really do cry more than men.

    That last paragraph makes me laugh. It’s okay what he said, because SCIENCE! Not, you know, that he has a right to say what he wants.

    1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      His comments weren’t even that bad. What’s inexcusable is him being forced to pretend they were inexcusable.

      1. Rich   10 years ago

        His comments weren’t even that bad.

        Are you kidding? Just *think* of all the women who cried when they heard that stuff!

      2. thrakkorzog   10 years ago

        His comments were more along the line that he doesn’t want any crybabys in science. To paraphrase a feminist movie, There’s no crying in science. You’re either right or you’re wrong. That’s how science works.

    2. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      “research shows women really do cry more than men.”

      Research at the Institute of “Well, duh!”

    3. Raven Nation   10 years ago

      BBC had a story yesterday that his resignation from UCL was along the lines of “if you don’t quit, we’ll fire you.” To make it worse, they called his wife while he was flying home and told her to tell him.

    4. lap83   10 years ago

      “London mayor Boris Johnson came to Hunt’s defense in an op-ed for The Telegraph on Sunday, saying that research shows women really do cry more than men.”

      In fairness, that isn’t because Tim Hunt is such a heartbreaker.

    5. JD the elder   10 years ago

      And the sad thing is that the guy is recognized as a scientist of major importance. But hey, let’s throw him in the trash because he said some dumb things. Either the people who make decisions like that think that being politically correct is more useful than being a good scientist, or they just haven’t thought about it at all. Either way, the implications are scary.

  46. Grand Moff Serious Man   10 years ago

    In which Jezzie’s bitch about rich people bitching about California’s water rationing

    My god, how will these rich people like golfer Phil Mickelson, who also lives in Rancho Sante Fe, survive “the war on suburbia” and “drought-shaming,” a term Yuhas created?

    Also, this quote:

    “I’m a conservative, so this is strange, but I defend Barbra Streisand’s right to have a green lawn,” said Yuhas, who splits his time between Rancho Santa Fe and Los Angeles. “When we bought, we didn’t plan on getting a place that looks like we’re living in an African savanna.”

    Nice. Look, rich people, Califronia is in dire straits! Don’t be a terrible person by claiming that your coins should get you more of the dwindling water supply while the rest of the state is cutting back. It doesn’t matter what your parents told you. You are not special. No one is special during a drought.

    Do they seriously think rich people are going to use up all the water in California? They can’t possibly come close to one-tenth of a percentage point of CA water.

    1. Rich   10 years ago

      You are not special. No one is special during a drought.

      Then you won’t mind them moving their tax dollars out of California.

    2. Injun, nonviolent Wood Chipper   10 years ago

      You are not special.

      And they teach the opposite in government schools, and expect people to think differently when they become adults?

  47. John   10 years ago

    Unless they find the bodies of young girls in her basement, I am not sure how Hillary could be revealed to be a more hideous human being.

    http://www.politico.com/story/…..mpaign=New Campaign#ixzz3dDp9yp56

    She took millions to speak a the Boys and Girls Club. She didn’t donate the money back or agree to speak for a nominal fee. No, she wanted her millions. What a craven greedy bitch. She is so greedy and obsessed with money it makes your hair stand on end.

    1. Slammer   10 years ago

      Unless they find the bodies of young girls in her basement

      What difference would that make?

    2. SugarFree   10 years ago

      Well, if she’s bathing in their blood to stay young she’s obviously doing something wrong.

      1. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

        It’s been established for about 80 years that you’re supposed to inject the young blood.

    3. sarcasmic   10 years ago

      Look. It’s not her fault that her foundation uses 94% of its donations on overhead, leaving only 6% for charity. Good help isn’t cheap.

      1. 2ndClassProle   10 years ago

        Man why has this not been shouted more in the media is just a proof of biased and corrupt media.

    4. Raven Nation   10 years ago

      Did this get covered last week?

      http://freebeacon.com/politics…..orsed-her/

      Later story claiming the 2008 check was to replace a 100k check that went missing in 2007 but wasn’t noticed until a year later. Trigger warning, BuzzFeed:

      http://www.buzzfeed.com/rosieg……pc5Wb9dLE

      1. Rufus J. Firefly   10 years ago

        Are any of the soccer brass here watching Copa America?

        1. Raven Nation   10 years ago

          Not I: no cable or satellite. Following the scores though.

        2. Rhywun   10 years ago

          Between that and girl soccer and hockey it’s been hard to pay full attention to it. But I noticed a couple upsets already.

    5. lap83   10 years ago

      It also makes you wonder about those non-profit groups, either they were incredibly gullible to believe that the Clintons would donate it back or they’re not spending their funds wisely.

      1. John   10 years ago

        They are run by Progs who think that giving the charity’s money to Prog politicians is not wasting it or violating their trust responsibilities. It is just another example of why Progs should never be allowed to infiltrate an organization.

    6. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

      The 5k I mentioned upthread was for a local Boys and Girls Club. Glad to see where that registration fee is going.

    7. Rich   10 years ago

      [Bill Clinton said] “I have done more appearances for other people than I have given paid speeches.”

      Uh, huh. How much did you get paid for those appearances?

    8. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

      She does sorta look like Gacy. And grew up only a few miles from him.

  48. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    From the Reuters idiocy linked above:

    For libertarianism is among the most rigid of modern ideologies. The theorists who formulated its core principles were seekers after political purity. They created an ideal world designed to work perfectly ? but only if human beings acted consistently. Society, to them, was like a Swiss watch: Let every part play its designed role, and the whole thing would run on its own accord.

    What a carefully crafted strawman.
    These people are completely unselfaware.
    “Based on my longing for a world in which outcomes are determined by some all-knowing, all-powerful force (be that God or government), I look at a model in which the ultimate end result is the random outcome of billions of individual acts and cower in terror and revulsion.

    1. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

      Most rigid? It’s the messiest most constructive/destructive “ideology” (I hate that word) around. And that’s what is so grand about it.

  49. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    And for no particular reason other than the cheese factor:

    1970s Men’s Fashion Ads You Won’t Be Able To Unsee

    The 1970s must have taken place on a different planet. These photos of men’s fashions from that decade leave us drowning in astounding mustard knits, garish patterns, high waists, way-too-skimpy briefs, and other fashion faux pas that defy description 40 years later.

    As synthetics fell in price, casual menswear was suddenly available to many young men looking to cut loose. Since polyester doesn’t require ironing, the “wash and wear” revolution is in full view of these models with their skin-tight threads. A Travelknit suit jumps out of the suitcase ready to wear, keeping with the decade’s focus on spontaneity and indulgence.

    1. lap83   10 years ago

      What’s up with the models in #9? They look like some random guys the photographer found in a bar.

      1. John   10 years ago

        The funny thing about the 1970s is that black people totally pulled it off. You see pictures from the 70s and the white people look ridiculous. The black people always look stylish even in the worst of the 70s clothes. I swear the 70s were some kind of small karmic payback for Jim Crow.

        1. Rt. Hon. Judge Woodrow Chipper   10 years ago

          Racist. everybody looked clownish, but we expect clownishness from black people.

    2. Rhywun   10 years ago

      40 years from now we’ll look back on today’s primped and pumped-up, tatted & slathered in hair product look and wonder “what the hell they were thinking”.

      1. lap83   10 years ago

        Whatever do you mean?

  50. LynchPin1477   10 years ago

    I was complaining about this last night, but if you are planning on seeing Jurassic World, save your money and just stay home. It was truly one of the worst movies I’ve seen in a long time, and more than that, it was insulting to the audience’s intelligence.

    1. Rich   10 years ago

      insulting to the audience’s intelligence.

      Please go on ….

      1. The DerpRider   10 years ago

        Does it rise to juvenile bluster?

    2. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

      duly noted.

    3. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      Does Hollywood produce *any* good movies nowadays?

      Oh, and you’re trespassing on my lawn.

    4. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

      I thought it could have been done much better, and even a few tweaks as simple as an extra line of dialogue here and there would have made it noticeably better/consistent. However, I wouldn’t say it was one of the worst movies I’ve seen in a while, unless you were expecting something a lot more serious than dinosaurs fighting.

      1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

        “I wouldn’t say it was one of the worst movies I’ve seen in a while”

        I don’t think they’re going to be quoting that in their publicity.

      2. LynchPin1477   10 years ago

        The dino fights weren’t even exciting. The CGI was very unimpressive for a big-budget movie in 2015 and the end fight sequences felt more like something out of Michael Bay.

        Here is what I said last night:

        Writing was awful. The plot, if you want to call it that, was one tired trope and cliche after another. But they don’t even linger long enough to try and develop any of them into a cliched movie. There may have actually been negative character development, in the sense that characters just do things that seem opposite their already thin personalities. Horrible, horrible forced romance. Bad CGI. Boring action sequences. Meaningless death scenes that I guess are supposed to be exciting, for some reason, but just left me feeling cynical (like, are we supposed to be happy that character died horribly? because they weren’t bad, or even annoying). Really unconvincing CGI for a major movie in 2015. And absolutely no heart. Some reviews are saying it was exciting but I didn’t think so at all. There were a couple genuinely funny moments, but usually I just found myself throwing my hands in the air. The unintentionally funny stuff was too annoying to actually laugh at. And HOLY SHIT the plot holes!!!!

        It almost felt like disaster porn. The scale of destruction was smaller but it had the same sort of vibe. I walked out saying that it reminded me of Transformers, but with dinosaurs. But I think even Michael Bay could make a better movie than this.

        1. LynchPin1477   10 years ago

          And this isn’t me just hating on action flicks. I can enjoy simple escapism that entertains with flashy things and loud noises. Not everything needs to be serious or though provoking.

          But whereas a summer blockbuster like Guardians of the Galaxy felt like the writers, director, and actors all knew what they were making AND having fun along with the audience, Jurassic World just felt like the writers and director were doing everything they could to cash in on what they think excites people (and evidently, it does). But it doesn’t feel like they had fun with it. Either that or they were too clueless to know what they were hacking together.

        2. Auric Demonocles   10 years ago

          I think it would have been improved quite a bit by dropping a few of the random, undeveloped subplots. That divorce thing didn’t really add anything. The girlfriend at the beginning? Totally irrelevant.

          I did really like the Larry kiss scene, but it would have held more weight if they’d stuck with avoiding the cliche the whole movie instead of making it “this guy is too nerdy for the cliche to apply to him”.

    5. John   10 years ago

      Hollywood just can’t make good big budget movies anymore. They can still make good movies but they are always smaller low budget ones. When Prometheus turned out so bad, that is when I finally gave up and admitted Hollywood is done. Could there be an easier set up for a good movie than that? A couple of smart college students could write a passable script on that premise. Yet, they managed to make the movie completely unwatchable and an insult to the audience, because that is what they do.

  51. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

    So my paper sold for $47 million, $1 million more than Providence, which has less than half our circulation. I think I could have put together a better offer myself. True story.

    1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      Someone bought Providence, Rhode Island for $46 million?

      1. UnCivilServant   10 years ago

        They were overcharged for it.

        1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

          I hear it’s like a miniature Detroit.

          1. crab_apple   10 years ago

            It’s not that bad. It’s not that great either.

    2. John   10 years ago

      If I were some internet billionaire, I would be quietly buying all of these papers. I would do it through shadow companies and keep a very low profile. I would let them lose money and continue to publish. Then, when I had collected a large number of them, I would come out of the shadows and make every single one of them a mouth piece for small government and listen to the gnashing of the Progs’ teeth and lamentation of their women.

      1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

        “At this rate I’ll have to close the newspaper…in 60 years.”

  52. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

    Uh oh, Reason…the Pope is going to back science over fantasy, unlike libertarians? Better start honing all of your “the Pope should stick to religion” articles, even though he will demonstrate a better understanding of the value of science than all of you.

    1. SugarFree   10 years ago

      Fuck off, joe.

      1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

        Good retort, sf. You sure told me off.

        1. John   10 years ago

          Better than running away and then crawling back in years later. It is one thing to be wrong, which you are about nearly everything. It is quite another thing to be a complete coward, which is what you are.

          I thought the board was the RACIST and you couldn’t be associated with it? What, you are down with racism now? Forget it Joe. You command less respect than shreek now. No one cares what you think about anything. Everyone knows you are a fraud.

          1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

            For a guy who doesn’t care what I say, you sure respond to everything I say. Seems a tad contradictory…

            1. John   10 years ago

              No one cares Joe. You are done. No one is going to engage you anymore. Why should they? You are a fraud and everyone knows it. You are wasting your time. Post your crap all you want but it won’t do you any good. The only response you will get is “fuck off midget”. You took your ball and went home. You can’t come back.

              1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

                You just did. You can’t keep anything straight, can you? I’m on your head, John…go on…admit it!

        2. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

          the Pope is going to back science over fantasy

          .
          Just ponder that statement for a moment…

          1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

            *grins*

          2. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

            I have. I am right.

            1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

              He should pray for a miracle. Isn’t that part of his job description?

              1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

                Sure. And God sent that miracle. It’s called science.

                1. A special place in JW's Hell   10 years ago

                  joe is conflicted over the erection that the commie pope is giving him.

                  Should I feel shame over it? Is it acceptable to to receive divine arousal?

    2. John   10 years ago

      Shut up Joe you mental midget. Why don’t you tell us about how the Democrats were going to defund the Iraq war and repeal the Patriot Act again? Or how Obama was going to respect civil liberties and the rule of law and not launch any illegal wars?

      We know who you are and what a clown you are and how you ran away and hid to avoid having to answer for the years of bullshit you posted on here.

      1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

        The intelligentsia checks on!

        1. John   10 years ago

          Yes Joe. This is where the adults talk and children like you are no longer welcome. Crawl back into your hole at DU.

    3. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

      And your transformation to a religious nut is complete.

      1. John   10 years ago

        He was never bright to begin with. When you think about it, the Catholic Church is a good home for him. Joe is one of those people who needs a top man to tell him what to think and how to act and who is the enemy.

    4. sarcasmic   10 years ago

      Hey dipshit. You ran away when I Godwinned the last climate religion thread, so I’m back to put you in your place.

      Remember I mentioned a certain politician who took the scientific consensus of the time to its logical conclusion, and you said I was comparing climate scientists to a dude with a funny mustache? Well, dipshit, that was very moronic of you. My point was that if a politician took today’s scientific consensus to its logical conclusion, and enforced a worldwide ban on fossil fuels, that billions of people would die. That wasn’t comparing the scientists to that Austrian dude, it was comparing a hypothetical politician to the failed artist. Dipshit.

      Now run away again. Run, Jackass! Run!

      1. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

        I do remember that! It was infantile of you then, and even more so today, now that you doubled down on it! Thanks!

        1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

          The only infant here is you.

          1. SugarFree   10 years ago

            He was the tallest man on his debate team, sarcasmic. Were you? Huh?

            1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

              No.

              *hangs head and shuffles away*

          2. Jackand Ace   10 years ago

            Your dad can beat my dad, sarc?

            1. sarcasmic   10 years ago

              If you still think my comparing a hypothetical politician to Adolph is the same as calling climate scientists Nazis, then yes. My grandfather could beat your dad. And he’s been dead for twenty years.

    5. Warty   10 years ago

      Are you still pretending this isn’t you, joe? Tell us some stories about that time you were a substitute teacher. That was pretty humiliating, right? Come on, tell exactly how degrading it was. Did the children call you names? Throw things at you? We know they didn’t have any respect for you, that’s for sure. Come on, details.

    6. OldMexican   10 years ago

      Re: Jackass Ass,

      Uh oh, Reason…the Pope is going to back science over fantasy,

      No, he is not. Global Warming is one thing; hysterical assertions about the dangers of “Climate Change” are NOT backed up by science or facts of any kind.

      “the Pope should stick to religion” articles, even though he will demonstrate a better understanding of the value of science than all of you.

      And when he doesn’t, you will be the first to say “The Pope should stick to religion!” I’d wager.

  53. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    my paper sold for $47 million

    That seems like a lot for a piece of real estate in downtown (I assume ) Columbus.

    1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

      The building didn’t come with it. True story.

  54. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

    My boss just came up to me and said “How are you liking this Vermont weather?”, then laughed at me. 🙁

    (it’s about 20 degrees above my acceptable max temp/humidity today)

    1. Rhywun   10 years ago

      In NYC, we call that “May through September”.

      1. Loves Big Brother Kristen   10 years ago

        NYC has nothing on DC swampass summers. Nothing.

  55. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    The building didn’t come with it.

    Wow. It seems as if a lot of these deals hinge on “undervalued” underlying assets like the real estate.
    .
    .
    .
    On Morning Joke, they brought in one of the CNBC guys to talk about the verdict in the Hank Greenberg / AIG lawsuit against the government. Just as the discussin

    1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

      We do have a high tech printing plant and do a lot of contract printing for other publications. That was part of the deal.

  56. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    Goddammit-
    Just as the discussion about AIG and it’s potential effect on future bailouts seemed to be getting interesting, the retarded girl lurched up in her chair and blurted, “Let’s talk about Panera!”
    What a fucking useless blithering ninny. She’s not even good looking enough to get a job fetching coffee at FOX.

  57. Derpetologist   10 years ago

    Warning: Carnivorous Corvette

    http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us…..te-n373316

    I heard a story on the radio about a guy who died after getting locked inside his 2007 Corvette. He was at Waffle House and went back to his car to get something. When he closed the door, he couldn’t open it again and the car began to heat up in the sun. The doors and windows in the car are all electric and the battery cable got loose somehow and he couldn’t start the car. He left his cell phone at home so he couldn’t call for help either. It appears he spent his last moments frantically searching the car’s manual for a clue on how to escape. There is an emergency release latch for the door, but most Corvette owners don’t know about it.

    1. Notorious G.K.C.   10 years ago

      A tragedy – mainly for the victim, but secondarily I suspect a tragedy for the car company once they get sued.

      1. John   10 years ago

        They have been making cars with remote entry for what 25 years now? In all of that time I have never heard of any car having such a defect. Clearly getting the electronics right is not that difficult. Companies like Jaguar and Range Rover, who are famous for being able to fuck up any kind of electrical system have managed it. And GM can’t? Yeah, GM should be racked over the coals for this.

        They should not worry however. If things get too hard, they can just declare bankruptcy and the Democrats will allow them to fuck over their tort victims so the unions don’t have to pay.

    2. creech   10 years ago

      I wasn’t aware that Corvettes didn’t have any windows to kick out.

    3. VG Zaytsev   10 years ago

      Why didn’t he just break out one of the windows.

  58. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    “it’s”
    Good grief.

    1. Citizen Nothing   10 years ago

      How can we take anything you say seriously now?

  59. The Late P Brooks   10 years ago

    a guy who died after getting locked inside his 2007 Corvette.

    “It was a mercy killing.”

  60. Warty   10 years ago

    Today’s Ohio headline of the day for today: Phony Tallmadge High School bowling coach gets probation for sexual relationship with teenager

    His double chin is a mighty one.

    1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

      She was 17 and this guy is a Tier III pariah for the rest of his life.

      1. Warty   10 years ago

        I don’t understand how it was illegal, because the age of consent here is 16. There’s a bullshit exception to that where coaches aren’t allowed to bang their athletes, but since he wasn’t really a coach, how does it apply?

        1. Free ?Woodchippers! Society   10 years ago

          Patriarchy. The whole age of consent thing is incredibly convoluted. Numerous states have an age 16 consent law, yet with arbitrary regularity 20 somethings are prosecuted as statutory rapists even if they weren’t a coach, teacher, preacher or whatever. If I were 19 with a 16 year old girl friend and I lived in a 16 Age of Consent state, I’d still assume that I’d have my life ruined if word of the relationship reached authorities.

    2. neoteny   10 years ago

      about a month’s worth of “inappropriate” text messages and photos

      How much is a month’s worth of texts and photos?

  61. RAHeinlein   10 years ago

    OT: FDA announced final ruling on partially hydrogenated oils (PHO’s) and has revoked GRAS status…

  62. neoteny   10 years ago

    I identify as a swallow; but when people ask me: “what do you mean, an European swallow or an African swallow?”, I have trouble answering them.

  63. OldMexican   10 years ago

    Re: Jackass Ass,

    Uh oh, Reason…the Pope is going to back science over fantasy,

    No, he is not. Global Warming is one thing; hysterical assertions about the dangers of “Climate Change” are NOT backed up by science or facts of any kind.

    “the Pope should stick to religion” articles, even though he will demonstrate a better understanding of the value of science than all of you.

    And when he doesn’t, you will be the first to say “The Pope should stick to religion!” I’d wager.

  64. OldMexican   10 years ago

    Looks like Joe (Jackass Ass) et al decided to make their last stand on the hill of Climatey Changey.

  65. adolphowisner   10 years ago

    I started with my online business I earn $58 every 15 minutes. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it out.

    ??????? http://www.workweb40.com

  66. John   10 years ago

    Those things are a fortune. And they are the definition of a car that actively wants to kill you. They are rear engined and of course have all of the over steer that goes with that. Of course if you know how to drive them, you can make that work for you. The problem is the turbo lag on those 930s is brutal. So not only do you have all of the over-steer problems that come with a rear engined car without traction control, you also have the lag to deal with. So even if you develop the skills and the balls to hit the accelerator when it starts to spin, you have this huge turbo lag. Meaning you have to hit the accelerator before it starts to spin. If you hit it when it does, you will get this enormous burst of power just as you are straitening out the car, which will put into the nearest arco barrier or telephone pole.

    Those 930s are probably the most terrifying cars every built.

  67. Lord Humungus   10 years ago

    Steve McQueen’s too… *sigh*
    Part of the proceeds going to Boys Republic:

    After the incident, McQueen’s stepfather convinced his mother to sign a court order stating that McQueen was incorrigible, remanding him to the California Junior Boys Republic in Chino, California. Here, McQueen began to change and mature. He was not popular with the other boys at first: “Say the boys had a chance once a month to load into a bus and go into town to see a movie. And they lost out because one guy in the bungalow didn’t get his work done right. Well, you can pretty well guess they’re gonna have something to say about that. I paid my dues with the other fellows quite a few times. I got my lumps, no doubt about it. The other guys in the bungalow had ways of paying you back for interfering with their well-being.” Ultimately, McQueen became a role model when he was elected to the Boys Council, a group who set the rules and regulations governing the boys’ lives He eventually left Boys Republic at 16. When he later became famous, he regularly returned to talk to the boys and retained a lifelong association.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_mcqueen

  68. John   10 years ago

    No. Mainer is the one who has the classic one. He has a 71 or 72 one I think. I have a cheap one. I have a 02, which is the first generation water cooled one. Great machine and a ton of fun, but not expensive and not well liked by the Porchephiles, who are the goofiest car enthusiasts on earth.

    The old 911s were very hard to drive. Unless you are Jackie Stewart or Mark Webber, it is a waste to have anything more than a couple hundred horsepower in them, because anything more than that is going to make them undrivable.

  69. John   10 years ago

    McQueen had his issues. He was a real asshole to his wives and girlfriends. But he was a great guy to children. He always took care of that place.

  70. John   10 years ago

    He was a complex guy. Most people who are genisus at something are. He was absolutely a genius movie actor. The thing about him was that he really wasn’t particularly good looking. He had blue eyes but didn’t have classic features the way Paul Newman or Robert Redford did. Yet he had more charisma on screen than either of those guys. He just understood the camera.

    My guess is that he had real issues with his mother and women in general as a result. His step father was a total asshole who beat the shit out of him and sent him to reform school and his mother not only introduced him into their lives but let him do that. I can see how someone who grew up like that would have an innate distrust of women and also be wildly insecure and looking for their approval. Distrust, resentment and insecurity is a volatile mixture.

  71. John   10 years ago

    I have done some. It is actually not that difficult of a car to work on. You just need a lift. You get that car off the ground and the entire engine is laid out right above you. Everything is very accessible. Without a lift, it sucks however.

    I do not have a good garage or even a decent driveway now. If I ever get one, I would love to splurge on a lift and be able to do real work on it. Until then, I pay someone else sadly.

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